Applejack and Her Cider Problems

by Windy Chaser

Rating: mature
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Main 6, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Profanity, Random, Sex
Length: 1092

This is a story of Applejack and her cider problems

When Applejack is drinking too much, her friends are worried, and try to help her. Although she's more of a ciderholic than Rainbow Dash, she refuses the help.
It is like 3:20 AM for me right now, it's so late, I HAVE TO DO THIS
And I'm sorry to anyone who has to verify this, I'm extremely tired

Published 2014-05-03 06:00:04 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-03 06:00:04 UTC

Chapter 2

"Shit! This hangover is killing me." Applejack said just before she vomited on the floor. "Then maybe you shouldn't drink so damn much." Twilight said, trying to convince Applejack to stop. Even though Dash loved the stuff, she was trying to help AJ stop, too.
"I ain't taking no AA class, and that's that!" She said. "I don't care." Twilight said. Just at that very moment, Applejack shut Twilight up, then said "Twilight?" The purple unicorn was getting really fucking annoyed, and didn't hold back her next words. "WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT?" She asked. "Twi? What's, what's Rule 34?" Applejack asked.
"You don't want to know." Twilight said, with a hint of annoyance in her voice. "Well, whatever it is, it sounds fun." She said. "NO, GOD NO!" Twilight yelled at her friend. "Ah don't care, Twi, I'm gonna fuckin' do it." Applejack said. Rainbow Dash rushed into the room, and asked why Applejack was saying she was going to clop. Suddenly, AJ put down her iPod, and looked at Rainbow with wide eyes
"I'm gonna go clop in the bathroom." AJ said, as she snapped a picture of Dash.
"Ummmm... She's hammered again?" Rainbow asked, scared that she was what Applejack was going to clop to. "Yup." Twi said, with annoyance in her voice.
Suddenly they heard Applejack moaning. "Is that her vomiting, or..." Suddenly she realized that it might be both, then Rainbow threw up on the floor.
"I'm sorry, I gotta go." Rainbow said suddenly.

Chapter 3

Author's Note

Look, before you read this, I've said this before and I'll say it again.
I DON'T FUCKING CARE ABOUT YOUR OPINION ABOUT CLOPFICS!!!! I'm not bothered by them, but I don't encourage clopping. Damn nearly nothing bothers me. THIS IS NOT A GRAPHIC PORNO, CALM THE FUCK DOWN!!!!!!

Chapter 3

Soon after AJ was done, she decided she wanted to go to Rainbow Dash's house and have a drink. The only issue was that she had been told by Twilight Sparkle told her that she may have scarred her for life.

Well... APPLEJACK DIDN'T FUCKING GIVE A SINGLE FUCKING FUCK!!!

So, she went to Rainbow Dash's house, where the entire thing was so fucking awkward that Rainbow Dash actually screamed, "DEMON SPAWN!!!!!!!". It was funny, because not a single fuck was given that day by Applejack, because she soon later said, "Rainbow?" in her drunk matter. "Y-yeah?" Rainbow Dash asked, her eye twitching aggressively while she spoke. "Rainbow... will you fuck me?" Applejack asked.

Rainbow didn't do anything. She just sat there, and she thought she may have went into a stroke.

Dashie sat there and shook under her coat while Applejack had Rainbow's hoof, and using it to masturbate. Rainbow Dash didn't know what to think about it. She was knew she was straight, but she thought it felt... Good? What the hell was she thinking! "APPLEJACK!!!!" Rainbow Dash suddenly screamed. Right at that moment, Applejack did begin to climax from the stimulation, but Dash yelled so loud that it quite literally scared the cum out of Applejack. After that, Rainbow Dash ripped her hoof out of Applejack's slit and retched on the floor. The scream of Rainbow Dash also immediately forced Applejack to go sober. "What the hell happened, Rainbow- OH MY GOD!" Applejack screamed as she started to squirt multiple times.

And you'll never guess what happened...

Rainbow Dash did it! Before Applejack became sober, Rainbow Dash quickly drank multiple cups of cider. She was extremely drunk, to the point where she felt the affects of being high on Mary Jane! Soon after, she just didn't give a fuck. As soon as Applejack spoke, Rainbow suddenly rammed her hoof into Applejack's pussy, and had started to move in and out of it so quick that she came REALLY fast. This was impressive, considering Applejack is a very tough nut to crack. While it would take Rainbow Dash about an hour to climax, Applejack considered that quick. It would usually take Applejack three hours to even spasm slightly. This time, it took (get ready for it)..... ten seconds FLAT!!!!

"What the f-" Applejack suddenly said, as she saw Rainbow Dash curled into a corner, licking her wet hoof. "Rainbow Dash, are you alright?" AJ asked the pegasus, who was on the brink of insanity. "MORE APPLES!!!" Rainbow Dash suddenly growled, just before she lunged at Applejack, took a mouthful of cider, spliced through Applejack's lips using her tongue, and spit it into her mouth while making out a bit with her. She then forced herself out of Applejack's mouth, and as she put her hoof in front of AJ's mouth, she said in a drunk, but sexy voice, "Now, swallow, AJ, It's not nice to spit your food out." Applejack did so, and then they were both drunk as FUCK!

So they took the opportunity, and they FUCKED LIKE THERE WAS NO GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!

Chapter 4

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Chapter 1

"How them (hic) applesh doin' Big Macintosh?" Applejack asked her big brother, who responded with, "Applejack, it's three in the morning." This just made his sister laugh, and say "Hee Hee, ya sure?" She asked. "Eeyup." He said to her. "I'm gonna go see Rainbow Dash." She said, as she stumbled out the door, and tried to run out the door, but smashed straight into it, and she was really fucking hammered, so all she did was start to cry. (I have nothing against AJ, I'm just as tired as she is drunk right now.). "Ya gotta be fuckin' kidding me." Big Mac said.
Applejack didn't even hit the door that hard, she was just too damn hammered to realize it.
"Big (hic) Macintosh, Applebloom got into the apple cellar again!" Applejack remarked. "She is in Appleloosa with Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle." Big Mac said, trying to find out how somepony can get THAT fucking wasted. "Oh yeah, never mind." She said, then laughed like she were to be smoking weed. "Big Mac?" She said. "Eeyup?" He responded. "Who in the FUCK ish this PewDiePie?" She asked

That's when Big Mac grabbed his iPod, PewDiePie merchandise, and went to where his sister sit. Big Mac bitch slapped her, then showed her who it was.

Author's Note

I'm sorry.... It's REALLY late at night, and I do shit like this really late at night. I mean, just earlier, when I went to put on the case on my iPhone 5S, I put it on upside down, and could see everything I was doing.