The Conversion Bureau - Lab Rat

Sorry for the song reference, if all that would happen in real life, I would sing this song to my plants everyday.

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The Conversion Bureau: Lab Rat

“Wait, did you just said makeover?” I asked Star. She had a huge smile on her little face.

“Yes, if you want to become a true mare, you need to take care of yourself. Take care of your mane, find you the perfect dress, all the mares are doing that kind of thing.” I stared at her.

“Okay for my made, but no dresses.” I said firmly.

“Only a few?”

“No.”

“One?”

“N…Okay.” There is no way of change her mind then.

“Yay, we’re going to be best friends, I know it.”

“Woo hoo.” I said in a monotone voice.

“Just follow me.” She said. She unlocked the door and jumped out. In the hallway, I saw a clock attached on the wall. There was an hour and a half until lunchtime; we got enough time to do girl stuff. We walked in silence to a room, which looked like the director’s room.

“Can you go there?” I asked Star. She checked at me while opening the door.

“It’s my sister’s room; she’s letting me use her makeup. Just follow me and prepare to be amazed.” I walked in front of a mirror and saw my mane. It was a real mess. It looked like a bird nest on top of my head.

“Dear Celestia, my mane is in such a mess.” I said out loud. She walked beside me and pushed me on a chair. She levitated a brush and started to brush my mane. After a wonderful moment of taking care of my mane, I looked like a diva out of a show.

“So, you like it?” She asked. I turned the chair to face her.

“No, I don’t like it.” Her smile faded right when I said this. “I LOVE IT!” This outburst startled her and another smile, even bigger, grew on her face.

“I’m so glad you like it. Now dresses time.” She took a dress and I tried to put it on. After a lot of trouble, I managed to wear it. I had only one reaction:

“No, this green doesn’t go with my mane and even less with my fur.”

She giggled lightly and she helped me remove the dress.

“I know, I wanted to show you, again, the power of the mare.” It’s true that I was never good with which color goes with what. Now, it feels like something natural. “Okay, you got your dress. Now, we’ll-“ I stopped her.

“No, I’ll choose another dress. It’s okay.” I made my way to the wardrobe and check what kind of dresses was there. I could say that the whole color spectrum was there. I carefully chose a pure red dress with a fake rose on it. It was nice and, with the pink of my fur, it was perfect.

“Nice choice, beauty.” Said Shooting Star when she helped me putting on those fine cloths. I was so beautiful, buck being a man; I like this one even more. Am I serious? I don’t even know.

“Now, you got your mane ready, your robe too. You just need your makeup.” She started levitate a mascara stick and started putting all those stuffs on my face. I don’t even know some of those products, but I trust Star. She was a mare from the beginning, right?

“I look amazing, thank you. Right on time, it’s 12:04. Wish me good luck.” I said to her. She walked beside me and said: “You don’t need luck; you’re born with those skills. Go get’em all… or only the blue one.”

I walked out of the room, still looking the work Star made on me. It was amazing. I made my way to the cafeteria and looked around to see where the lucky stallion I met is. After being checked by all the stallions in the room, my date popped behind me.

“Hi A! Oh, dear Celestia, you’re so gorgeous today. It’s nothing compared to few hour. What happened?” He asked. I started to smile a little. I turned to face him.

“You remember the mare you talked at my room door? She is awesome when she starts to make you a makeover. Also, let’s take a seat, I’m starving.” I answered. He nodded and we walked to a free table. That’s when I saw that it was a high school style cafeteria, where you got a choice between few meals and you receive it.

I walked to go in the line. After waiting for a few minutes, I arrived at the serving zone. “Hi miss, wow, I like your style. Anyway, today, we serve salad with hay and alfalfa. Want some?” I nodded and she gave me the plate by levitating it. In it, there was the salad, apple juice and an apple. Also, a little brownie for dessert.

“Shanks.” I said while having the plate between my teeth. I walked back to the table when I saw that ‘he’ wasn’t there. I check in the line and saw that he was getting served. I placed the plate on the table and waited for him to come back.

“Why don’t you eat?” He asked when he came back. He was holding the plate with his wings. Neat trick, I like it.

“I was waiting for you. You didn’t tell me your name yet. What is it?” I asked. He placed his plated in front of mine and sat down.

“You didn’t tell me yours, you only told me that your name is A. Give me your complete name and I’ll give mine.” He said. Why do I need to give my name? It doesn’t even make sense now that i’m a mare.

“Okay, but my name look like a male name.”

“I don’t care, what is it?” Wow, he really want to know.

“Anthony Matias Duquette. I prefer my friends to call me ‘A’.” I was ashamed of my old name now. I need to find myself a pony name.

“It’s a nice name. My name is North Wind.” We ate a bit before continuing the conversation.

“So, what’s up with that guy who... died this morning?” After hearing this, a little tear started to form beside my eye.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t want to make you cry. Do you want to stop talking about him?

“No, no... it’s okay. He was my friend when I used to... work with the HLF.” My revelation shocked him.

“You used to work with the HLF!? Why are you a pony then?” He asked. I took a bite before answering.

“My friend revealed to me the truth. Remember Keven’s speech?”

“Who? Oh, the dead guy, yes, I remember. Something about chips or something... don’t tell me that-”

“Yes, I was controlled, but my friend melted it with the serum.”

“Your friend was a HLF member?” He asked.

“No, he worked with the PER to transform me and run away. He’s even here right now. Well, he was supposed to be here. I wonder where he is.” I finished the plate. It tasted amazing. I took the apple and ate it in one bite. It makes me remember when I was young. I ate apples every day.

“Amazing. So, are we going to eat together again tonight?” I asked him.

He finished his tray. “Yes, I’ll have something even special if you want.”

“Nice, I like special, special is my middle name.”

“I thought Matias was your middle name.” We both laughed. We walked back to our rooms. I needed to get ready for the earth pony classes.

I removed the still stainless dress Star gave me, I’ll need to give it back. I walked to Star’s room and gave her the dress, she was impressed that there was no stains. Also, I asked her for some makeup remover. She gladly gave it to me only if I would come back later to prepare me for tonight’s date. I gladly accepted the offer and went to the bathroom.

I used the makeup remover to clean my face and did my business. Then, I walked back to my room, put the bottle on my table and made my way to the greenhouse. I was a little early so, I managed to have a talk with the teacher.

“Hi.” I said. He turned and looked at me. He was a navy blue stallion (why is every stallion blue?) and his mane was fire truck red, with a lightish blue interior. He smiled and started talking with an accent.

"Hey there, so whats a pretty mare like yourself doing out here... wait you must be here for the classes," He said while holding out his hoof, “Well, my name is Alejandro, but that name might change. So, what is a pretty looking mare... wait, I already said that.” He looked nice and funny, for a teacher, I mean.

“Yes, I’m new here and I want to know what earth ponies can do. Is it true that they are useless?” He facehoofed hard before continuing the conversation.

“ALL LIES. If there were no earth ponies, nothing would get done. They can grow plants right in front of you. If you think about it, its like my magic except more in tune with the earth." Well, it sure look interesting, said like this.

“So... where are you from?” I asked him.

"Well I left Australia after that whole PER incident I was in so I went to Equestria for a bit then came here to help out." He answered. Then, a group of earth ponies arrived and we started the class.

“Today, we’ll learn the basic of crop growing.” He said to the group, “I’ll give you each three seeds and you will try to make them grow.” He, then, gave me and the other student the seeds. We all walked in different direction and started to work. For my part, I went to see Ale for an answer.

“How do we make them grow?” I asked him. He turned around and smile.

“This is the best part, you need to find what they like. Think of them as your friends. Friends don’t all like the same thing. Some of them like music and the others stories. Try to find what your friends like.” Well, this is going to be tough. I walked in a corner and checked the other students. They were all trying to find what their new friends’ likes. I planted the seeds in the ground and lied on the ground, in front of them.

“Hi little flowers, my name is Anthony. I’m here to take care of you. What would you like to hear, a story or a song?” I asked then. It almost sounded ridiculous to talk to plants until I could swear I heard an answer. I heard a bit of music coming out of them.

“Okay. I know a good song, but, with my new voice, I don’t know how it will sound like.” I took a deep breath and started to sing :

I'm through with standin' in lines to clubs I'll never get in.

It's like the bottom of the ninth and I'm never gonna win.

This life hasn't turned out

Quite the way I want it to be.

There was some sprouts coming out of the earth. I somehow knew that they liked when I’m singing.

I want a brand new house on an episode of Cribs.

And a bathroom I can play baseball in,

And a king size tub

Big enough for ten plus me.

The sprouts were beginning to grow leaves.

I need a credit card that's got no limit,

And a big black jet with a bedroom in it.

Gonna join the mile high club,

At thirty-seven thousand feet.

The flowers appeared on top of the sprouts. One more verse and the flowers would be fully grown!

I want a new tour bus full of old guitars.

My own star on Hollywood Boulevard.

Somewhere between Cher,

And James Dean is fine for me.

I could say that the flowers exploded in front of my face, but it would be a little bit exaggerated. Let’s just say that Alejandro was proud of me when he saw that I managed to make them grow before everypony else.

“Wow, that’s impressive for most newfoals, most of them try to get over the talking to the plant, but I have never seen anypony grow a plant that quick. Share to the rest of the class your little secret you used.” He said.

“S...secret? You mean like what I did differently?” I asked.

“Yes!” He answered. Everypony were listening for my golden rule of crop growing.

“I just asked them what they liked and they managed to answer me. It was weird, but fun.” The whole class was surprised and went back at their little garden. While the teacher was congratulating me for my success, lots of student used my trick and grew some beautiful flowers. It almost looked like the garden back at the HLF headquarters.

“Well class, it’s time to say goodbye. I hope that, later on, you say that earth ponies are useful and not a bunch of sack of... never mind. Anyway, see ya later!” I could swear he was about to say something bad. At least, the human part was easily suppressed by his pony side.

After the class, a pony with a brown mane came to see me.

“Hey girl, I saw that you were good at growing food. Would you mind helping me in the kitchen?” She said. Getting a job at something that involves cooking filled me with joy.

“Awesome, I would love to. What do you need help for?” I asked her.

“Our pastry chef got hay fever and is staying at his house back in Equestria. Can you make dessert for tonight’s dinner?”

“I can make it, but not serve it. I got a date tonight with a nice stallion.” I said.

“Well, that’s no problem, dear. Just follow me and think about a recipe.”

“Nice, this is going to be fun.”

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Thanks to DaBunnanaKing for his OC. He's a good earth pony teacher (and sometime, a real idiot).