Letters of an Ignored Daughter

by Commander Hot Stuff

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy
Length: 4204

Celestia has a daughter and this daughter is not very happy with the arrival of her mother's favorite student.

Rainbow Dash has lived a simple life in Ponyville, until the day her father told that she was adopted. And her mother is none other than the Sun Goddess, Princess Celestia. The arrival of a unicorn that has received more attention of Celestia than Rainbow throughout her entire life infuriates the pegasus to the point that she decided to send reports to her mother, expressing her disgust.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-01-15 02:59:06 UTC

Friendship is Magic

Dear Princessa Celestia,

What have you got in that shit which you calls head to send your " personnel student " where I am currently living? I mean, it was no longer enough to fuck my life taking my horn and turning me into a deadly Pegasus, you made a pegasi couple (thousand times better parents than you) adopt me, I spending my childhood being mocked by my classmates, and then I discover that the all-powerful ruler of Equestria is my mother and I could have already become a Wonderbolt long time ago. Okay, palms for you.

Your mediocre student had the courage to speak the Wonderbolts not accept a pegasus (correcting her, I'm a alicorn without a horn) who could not clear the sky on a single miserable day. I had the pleasure to rub in the face of that bitch that I could do it in ten seconds flat. Not to mention the small change I made in the style of her mane. Fluffy is more the style of a stuck smartass unicorn. Do you know where I can find one of those glasses for nerds? I'd love to add it to her look.

We (and when I say we, I mean the other four) did everything we could to show our hospitality. And how she thanks us? Locking herself in a bedroom inside a LIBRARY and not talking to anyone. Her dragon (Spike, if I'm not mistaken), is a very fun guy, he managed to make a hat with the uncool lamp which was in the library junk.

So we spent the whole night in a party where the honoree neither made a point to attend and move our asses to City Hall, where each and every event happens in Ponyville. Ponyvillians awaiting you and your sunbutt to raise the sun for the first time in their humble town. And what happens? You simply do not appear and in your place, a depraved crazy pony screams that night will last forever. The egghead saids she call Nightmare Moon, the old “Mare in the Moon” story.

I decided to do something for Equestria, since you do not, and follow your student back to the library. Clearly you knew Nightmare Moon would return and sent a spy (your antisocial student) to keep an eye. Luckily, Pinkie Pie is smarter than her and found the book first.

Five elements and one unknown (holy shit) are able to defeat Nightmare Moon. They are Honesty, Kindness, Laughter, Generosity and Loyalty. In short, Applejack, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rarity and me. Nothing could be simpler.

I pretended to fall on talk of shadowbolts, they really know how to cherish someone (thing a certain mother does not) even if it were to delay our search for the Elements. If they were real, and not just ponies created from the nightmare, that stallion much like with Soarin would be lucky to clop with the unknown Princess of Equestria.

We found the elements. Fluttershy and I went down them to the floor with that retarded asking for us to be care. As if I did not know that stones are fragile (okay, it did not make sense). Then she made a pose of intellectual and we decided to leave her alone. Maybe Nightmare Moon would appear and kill her? Then we would find the sixth element and defeat that sinister thing and we would get all the credit that your student would probably get alone. Yes, I have obsession with being famous since the part of my throne was torn from me.

Nightmare Moon stepped on them as if they were, you know, apples and they broke. The smartass saw that she needed us and we turned up at a very opportune moment. She said some crap about us and what we represented the elements. If someone asked me before we get into the Everfree Forest I would answer with pleasure. I always knew I was the bearer of the Element of Loyalty. How else I would try to save your kingdom and your sunbutt after you abandoned me?

Then magically the sixth element came from the ceiling and a rainbow blast (yes, rainbows rule) hit the crazy pony. But instead of killing her, blew the "shell" into a thousand pieces revealing none other than my aunt (insanity sends hello).

Pinkie decides to play a party for the return of my aunt imprisoned on the moon for a thousand years and you grant your student remain in Ponyvile, according to you to learn about the magic of friendship. But I know you know what I'm capable of and wants somepony to watch me. The lame excuse about reports of friendship melted the hearts of my friends, pathetic.

Your daughter,

Rainbow Dash

PS: The sixth element is Magic (of Friendship), she knows us less than 24 hours and already think our friendship is a powerful thing. Damn pariah.

PPS: Spike is a nice guy and agreed to send my reports to you too. He deserves better than Twilight Sparkle, please give him to me as compensation to all moral and physical damage I suffered all these years.

The Ticket Master

Dear Princess Celestia,

I'm not a gross subject, is you that are an irresponsible mother. If I can not have Spike, okay, I'll have fun with your student as I did today. For starters, it was YOUR idea to send two tickets to the Grand Galloping Gala. If you are not counted, we are five distinct mares. Or do you think there is a Rainpieflutterarijack walking through Ponyville?

Personally, I think it would be a very pretty mare. A white alicorn with a long rainbow mane, light blue eyes and wearing a Stetson. Her cutie mark would be ... A big apple with a gem, a butterfly and a balloon inside. Underneath the apple would be a curved lightning.

So you would have to admit that exists another princess besides you and Aunt Luna. But back to the normal things in this insane earth, each of us had a reason for wanting the ticket more than the other.

Applejack wanted to expand his business out of Ponyville and show Granny Smith that her pies are much better. Rarity wanted to marry (my cousin) Prince Blueblood, the biggest mistake she could make in life. Fluttershy wanted to meet the animals of the royal gardens, as if they were different from others. Pinkie just wanted to have a little extra fun at a party widely commented throughout Equestria. And I, well, I want to make this Gala one that nobody will forget the next thousand years. A really fun Gala, together with Pinkie Pie.

For this ticket, I started the competition, leaving the other so eagerly crazy, Twilight reduced to a confused, crazy and hungry pony. Yeah, I'm great. But as I also wanted the ticket, I opened a hole in a large cloud to keep her dry while she ate. And no, I would not do for anyone else except interested me.

Pinkie Pie got the height to make the whole town because of chasing Twilight ticket, leaving only as hiding place her "home", the library, where I suggested we hide. Twilight broke into a scream about not being able to decide, and one by one my friends gave up the ticket, except me. But I had to show that also gave to, because I love them. Just for that.

So Twilight returned the tickets and what did you fixed it, sending tickets to all of us. And what I learned is that the pressure does a rational pony become crazy.

Your ambitious and happy daughter,

Rainbow Dash

Griffon the Brush Off

Dear Princess who I shall call mother without any reason,

Today my old friend Gilda came to visit. I was really looking forward to something fun in Ponyville. To be honest, pranking with Pinkie Pie was losing the fun.

We racing, we did risky flight maneuvers (my favorite), and had a bit of Pinkie Pie. But for some very mysterious reason, she was gone for hours.

Guess why she disappeared? She was planning a party to welcome Gilda. Pure Pinkie Pie. So I decided to reminisce about the old days and put some pranks in all possible places the party, hoping that her laugh. Or if she got angry, I could blame Twilight. Griffon are carnivores, you know.

But for some dumb reason, Gilda accused Pinkie Pie of doing the pranks, and still accused MY pranks of being lame. I really love Pinkie Pie as the little sister that I'll never have, and I'm not lame. Then I said some beautiful truths to Gilda.

I think I broke off the friendship whit her, but it's better that way. I heard that Gilda made Fluttershy cry in the market while she led the ducklings. I matured, she did not.

Your matured daughter,

Rainbow Dash.

PS: Fluttershy would feel better if you sent the bunnies that I asked you in my last letter. And no, I'm not trying to destroy Ponyville.

Boast Busters

No-Dear Mother that I hate Princess Celestia,

Never trust a unicorn. I thought that finally someone would humiliate your dear student and what I get in return? A butt hurts, really hurts.

Your daughter who hates unicorns (except Rarity)

Rainbow Dash.

PS: Please order your guards stop search my house looking for bombs. We need a new water reservoir. And tranquilizer for cows.

Look Before You Sleep

Dear Princess Celestia,

Trees are really comfortable for a nap. Unfortunately so comfortable that I fell asleep in service. So today will have a big storm to compensate for what I did not do last week. I hope your student go crazy sharing the same space that Applejack and Rarity.

Your daughter willing to do your student suffering,

Rainbow Dash

PS: Who has never done a slumber party as a kid? Even I did.

Bridle Gossip

Dear Princess Celestia,

Why the hell there are zebras in Equestria? Have not enough the unicorns and now, zebras. I swear if I hear any more rhymes, I do not answer for my actions. I was quite happy to break much of her house having as excuse my uncontrolled flight. And now besides Spike, I want a Appletini. And never be like your idiot student who judges a book by the cover. That said book can save your skin. By the way, I hate books, except "History of the Wonderbolts".

Your racist daughter,

Rainbow Dash

Swarm of the Century

Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I met the weirdest and cutest(?) creature that roams our lands. Parasprites. Really cool creatures when it comes to reproduction and mass destruction. Luckily, we have Pinkie Pie to save the day with a band of one pony.

You could come here more often.

Your daughter really glad,

Rainbow Dash.

PS: Ponyville need wood to be rebuilt, and as I said, come here more often.

Winter Wrap Up

Dear Princess Celestia,

Winter Wrap Up is one of the coolest events of the year. This year, I, Applejack and Sparkler been in charge of the teams. And everything running smoothly until your student trying to help. It is a Ponyville tradition, therefore, without Canterlotians here.

Let's say we only have two ways here: Earth Pony Way or Pegasi Way. Therefore, we charitably let her think who was helping giving her the most unnecessary office in the world: organizing.

I took Spike a dozen sapphires because he had the flu. He was very happy.

Your working daughter,

Rainbow Dash

P.S: Sweet and tasty sapphires – Spike

Call of the Cutie

Dear Princess Celestia,

Today was a really busy day and not a cloud left to rest, so I had to pick a black even. Then I heard Apple Bloom complain about something. Of course, she does not have her cutie mark and I totally understand her impatience.

I tried the various forms of sport with her, but all in vain. Then she will definitely not have a cutie mark in sports.  Later I knew that she joined Rarity's little sister and my number one fan and they formed a group called the Cutie Mark Crusaders. That sounds good to me.

Your daughter committed to helping foals without cutie marks,

Rainbow Dash.

PS: Please send a new cookbook to Pinkie Pie or a new furnace ... Those cupcakes seemed made of charred pony meat .

Fall Weather Friends

Dear  Princess Celestia,

Oh, autumn. My favorite season of the year. When I was a little filly, my dad used to bring me to Ponyville, and I loved it. I saw that ponyvillians also had a race, the Running of the Leaves. I watched really excited to see who would win.

And it was in this race that I met Applejack. She watched the race at a certain distanceshe did not look very well. I approached her and asked her what she was feeling. She stood frightened and ran away from me.

I've always been a fast Pegasus, so I used all my wingpower (which was not very strong) to reach her. Heck, she ran very fast on four hooves, but I managed to catch her and hold her down.

She asked me to I would leave her alone, but I said no, because she looked sad and I wanted to know why. She said it was not my business, and I would not care even if I knew. So I screamed for her to stop being silly, and she screamed back that I was silly and nosy.

I lost my patience and said it really was not my business and walked away from her. I stopped a few feet from her and looked at her. She was curled up in a ball and crying. I had been a bad pony and have made her cry. I approached and said I was sorry, but she said I was not my fault. She also said she was sad because every year her daddy brought her mother to see her run, but they had died a few months ago and it was her first Running of the Leaves without them.

I hugged her with sincerity and said I did not have a mother too (guess who is at fault), but I liked to remember the happy times I had with my adoptive mother (who had died). So we decided to seal our friendship with a run. We tied.

We have not seen each other for years, I joined the Junior Speedesters and Fluttershy moved to Ponyville to take care of some sick animals there, in her letters, she told me about Applejack.

Years later, I moved to Ponyville. But my behavior and my attitudes had changed too. I was extremely competitive and arrogant. But this year the peak reached during a simple game with horseshoes that became a Iron Pony Competition and then the worst of the Running of the Leaves ever.

But it served to remind us that our friendship (Sealed years ago with a fillies race) is very important than competition. Not that the competition is not important, because for us continues to be, it is a part of us. Just we can not let that happen over what happened today.

Your daughter,

The Iron Pony.

PS: I'm sure your student uses teleportation to get the fifth place.

Suited for Sucess

Dear Tyrant Celestia,

Why the hell ponies who spend about 99% of their lives completely naked have to wear a dress for an event? I'm totally awesome naked. I have style, charm and elegance (when I want), do not need a corny dress to look pretty. A simple scarf was sufficient, maybe something to adorn the mane too. I mean, how will I be able to show my stuff for the Wonderbolts on this thing? I'm like a walking rainbow. Not to mention the clouds in the hem of my dress.

But I'm accepting this for Rarity, although a scarf would have been 20% cooler. My girly friends (including Applejack), are really excited about their new dresses and liveliest yet for the Gala.

Your awesome and naked daughter,

Rainbow Dash.

Sonic Rainboom - Part I

Dear Mother,

I do not know how to start this letter. I could tell how nervous and anxious I am. Or I could lie and say that I'm fine. I've been trained for weeks, reviewing all my movements step by step.

I could tell you that I'm not scared. But I am.

I never felt so nervous or scared in my life as I am feeling now. Not even in the history exam. All I wanted now was your hug and you saying me that everything will be fine, that I'll do it.

I wanted to believe it.

Fluttershy has been a greater moral support than she could never imagine. But in the state that I am, all I do is criticize her. I can not sleep thinking about it.

So I decided to write this letter in the middle of the night. It's the only way to alleviate what I'm feeling. Back to the city where I grew up with few ponies believing in me does not help much.

I do not know who else to ask for help,

Rainbow Dash

PS: I don't want to wake Spike, so I used the old locket that Dad gave me to send it.

Sonic Rainboom - Part II

Dear niece,

Sorry not be your mother who is answering you, but Celly is sleeping after a long exhausting day. Having all Equestria on your back is not easy. But I'm not writing to talk about her and yes about you.

I could say things like "are you kidding me?" But I completely understand what you are feeling, my dear niece, and I hope through this letter be a balm to your torments.

I was born among the most powerful alicorns: my parents and my older sister. I saw my father raise the sun early in the day and lower it in the evening. Then mom raised the moon and this meant it was night. But I had never seen her lowering the moon.

Then one day my father interrupted a play between me and my sister, saying he had something important to talk to Celly. They were taken to a private room, and I was curiously listening on the door.

He told her that he would teach her how to raise and lower the sun. And very soon, mom teach me to do the same with the moon. I was scared. The moon was a very large glowing white ball to me. Mom always slept a few hours in the morning, so I thought that the moon was very heavy. I was afraid to fail, just as you are today.

For me, using my magic to move the moon was to do the impossible. Look, I was just a little filly. Celestia was only a few years older than me. I hid in the forest, if they do not find me, they could not force me to do the impossible. That's what I thought.

The guards of my father spent hours and hours searching for me, but I did not answer any of them until I heard the voice of Celly. She managed to find me in my hiding place and take me back to the castle. My father gave me a scolding because I had ran away, he told me that mom was so sad that he had forgotten to raise the moon and he had to do.

So the lessons about the moon began. Mom watched me raising the moon and spent the night awake with her. She teach me the Dreamwalker, a spell that allowed her to enter the nightmare of the foals and calm then down. I have make many friends in the dream world. When the dawn came, mom lowered the moon. We were going to sleep.

One day, my mother and I were walking to the balcony as usual and she told me that I would raise the moon for the first time. I got scared and told her that I was just a little filly and the moon was enormous. But I did not try to escape again.

Dad and Celestia had just lower the sun and were waiting for us. I looked at the sky and lit up my horn and as I was lifting my head, the moon was rising in the sky. It was not as heavy as I thought. It was like levitate my crown to my head in the morning. That night, the night I got over my fear, I made the impossible happen. And that was how I got my cutie mark.

I know it is an old story but I hope I have helped you. Give your best and make your impossible happen. I believe in you, my niece.

With love,

Your aunt Luna.

PS: Your mother woke in middle of the night to eat a piece of cake and catch me writing this, she said she believes in you and she will be there to watch you, I would be there too, but I have to command the court in her absence. Do not forget, you are capable and I believe in you.

Applebuck Season

Dear Princess Celestia,

Are you implying that I'm a terrorist? Do not even think about taking my Gala ticket. While I have hurt somepony this week (unintentionally), I'm far from turning my best friend in stone. Yes, I knew the whole story of the guy you do not like to talk about.

The pony in question is called Big Macintosh, but everyone calls him Mac or Big Mac because he is very big, in every way. But it was not a good idea to try bondage with him (he being the victim).

How would I imagine it was Applebuck Season Eve?

Excluding the part that I had been catapulted onto the balcony of your stupid student, the week was pretty fun. First, a general poisoning because of some spoiled muffins and then a herd of bunnies terrorizing all residents. Ponyville can be very funny sometimes.

Finally, Applejack accepted the help that Twilight was trying to impose her (and I know where she learned) and we all received a bottle of apple juice after a really hard day's work.

Your sexually satisfied daughter,

Rainbow Dash.

PS: Fluttershy needs new bunnies, those probably fled to Manehattan.

PPS: Spike requested to ask if you accept a muffin.

P.P.P.S.: They are delicious – Spike.

Dragonshy

Dear Princess Trollestia,

You have dozens of stallions of all kinds on your guard and a flyer elite, why the hell you want to send me and my friends to talk to a DRAGON?

If there's anything I hate more than losing is to see any friend of mine hurt. Or being injured. And you have the potential to do so. So let's make a deal, you stop it and I stop to offend you at the beginning of each letter, although you deserve.

I never doubted Fluttershy. I'm just super protective of her. And in relation to Pinkie Pie too. And also in relation to Rarity. And Applejack too, although she is as strong as me. And I know how Fluttershy is afraid of dragons, we grow together in Cloudsdale.

The great lesson I learned today is that your mother may think that you are a terrorist and as punishment, sending you straight into the mouth of a dragon. No need to comment which your student tried to argue with a dragon. He could have eaten her, would be a great favor.

Your non-terrorist daughter,

Rainbow Dash

Feeling Pinkie Keen

Dear Princess Celestia,

When I arrived in Ponyville, few years ago, ponyvillians warned me about the Pinkie Sense. At first moment, I did not believe. Said it was bullshit Pinkie Pie's body(even though she was so random) predict the immediate future.

Would be too obvious to say on that same day I met my number one fan, Scootaloo. Pinkie was watching some of my maneuvers and then her tail began to shake. She hid under a rock (like I said, totally random) and I just laughed. Right this moment an orange filly fell on top of me, taking us both to the ground.

She smiled embarrassed and apologized to me, said that her name was Scootaloo and she was trying to do some of my tricks on her scooter, she had thought that was amazing and had never seen a pegasus flying as I flew, only the Wonderbolts.

I was a little intrigued by that. Not with the part to be commended, because I love compliments, but with part of she trying to make it on her scooter. I mean, she was a pegasus filly, so why could not she try to make it fly? Only then I realized that her wings were underdeveloped for her age.

If Pinkie's tail began to shake, is better hide, or you will get screwed.

Your nostalgic daughter,

Rainbow Dash