Temporary Hiatus
I've dreamed of this moment for a long, long time, to see you broken at my feet, to gloat as you are powerless to respond, to laugh with my henchponies until my sides ache and my lungs burn. Oh, the mere thought would bring a cruel smile across my face, and I could only imagine my joy if this fantasy of mine was to become a reality. How I have dreamed of the indescribable ecstasy I would experience from the mere sight of your cold motionless body before me.
Right now I've never felt more sick in my entire life. Just looking at your blood staining my fortress's floors twists my emptied stomach. I wish I had the foresight to demand a bucket before I had sent my guards away. I will have to clean that mess before I call them back. Can't have them thinking their mighty leader is squeamish in the presence of a little gore. We all have reputations to keep, don't we?
May I be honest with you, Ms. Do? Of course I can. How long have we known each other? A long time, yes? A very long time? You, perhaps, know me better than any other in the world. Of course I can be honest with you.
I have never been so disappointed. No, not when you robbed me of the Sapphire Statue or destroyed my home in Tenochtitlan. I suppose I am no stranger to letdowns. Whenever my warriors return to my side licking their wounds or whenever I lead a temple raid only to find its contents already salvaged, there is always disappointment, coupled with rage, a seething rage that makes a mighty volcano seem mild.
That anger is oddly absent today, and without it all I feel is disappointment. I feel...empty.
Was this all it really took, Ms. Do? A single arrow? One, single, well positioned arrow? I've seen you face a storm of these missiles without blinking. How is it that of all the thousands of darts and bolts thrown at you, this is the one that pierces your heart? No enchantment, no mystically properties, nothing special, just a simple iron arrow.
I am disappointed.
There were no elaborate traps, no spring mechanisms or levers or piranhas. My time and my efforts have been spent wasted. If this was so easy, why did it take so long? Why couldn't I have done away with you so much sooner? How many of my plans would have seen the light of fulfillment if you had been struck by that very arrow on our first encounter, in that temple so long ago? And now that you are finally gone, I can't even take credit. I wasn't the one to throw the arrow. I don't even know who did or from which direction it came from. I can't take credit for this, not without becoming disgusted at myself.
I am disappointed.
Why didn't you see it coming? Why didn't you dodge? I do not understand. I know you, Daring Do. I know how fast you are, how your agility is more than a match for a tiger. I've seen you evade flying spears and swinging blades. Thousands of arrows have never even grazed you. This one was no different from the others. It should not have hit. You know it. I know it. It should not have ended this way.
Don't give me excuses. Your legs might still be broken and I see that your wing has yet to recover from our earlier engagement but remember who you are. You're Daring Do, adventurer extraordinaire, the hero archeologist! You're my nemesis! How could you fall so easily? Why didn't you get out of the way? Don't just lay there and ignore me. Answer my questions!
I...I'm sorry, Ms. Do. I...as you can see, I am having a difficult time accepting this. This wasn't suppose to happen, not like this. I don't even remember how I wanted this to go down. It's all a distant memory now, like a glimpse of a dream. I can't even hear your imagined screams in pain. There's only...silence. How I hate this silence.
Tell me Daring, how did you expect this to end? Certainly not with an arrow in your chest, eh? Ha, no I would think not. Was it above a pit of lava? Or perhaps a final duel on the highest mountain peak? Oh, it must have been an epic battle, one last fight for an artifact that would spell the doom of all the land. Certainly not over this little bauble, I'm sure. I wonder, how did you imagine I would die? Please tell me, Ms. Do, how was your last book going to end? How was your series going to end?
Oh don't look so surprised. Of course I know of your little side project, Ms. Do. Yes, yes, I can read. Sarcasm is not becoming of you. What, have I read...well...excuse me.
...yes, we are alone. I had to make sure before I answered, that's all. The answer is yes, Ms. Do, I have read your works. If I may be honest with you once more, I became desperate. You had already defeated me so many times. I thought, a rather foolish thought I'll admit, perhaps your recordings might hold some sort of secret, a weakness I've been blind too. At the very least, an understanding of your view of the situation and way of thinking would have given me some advantage. I've read through the entire series at least twice, hoping to find something, anything, to use against you.
Did I enjoy your books? What a difficult question.
Do you remember the first time we met? I am a little surprised that you chose to exclude such a pivotal event from your writings. Then again, I doubt it would have been approved by the publishers. Yes, I can't imagine the scene where you quite literally ripped your way through my guards would have sat well with all the parents of your young adoring fans.
Funny, I don't recall feeling sick that day like I do right now. No stomach churning, no embarrassing vomits, and it was far messier then too. How odd...
To this day I still do not understand why you spared me. There I was, helpless before you. You held all the cards that day. Opportunity sat right in your hooves, but you let your chance slip away. Why? Why did you stay your hoof? And why do you no longer seek my life? What happened that you so willingly gave up your quest for vengeance?
May I be honest with you, Ms. Do? I am sorry for your father's death. Yes, I am sorry. Shocking isn't it? He was an interesting stallion, brave and intelligent but foolish at times. The good doctor would too often allow the kindness in him cloud his better judgement. But he deserved my respect and without his assistance, my rebirth would not have been possible. His death was necessary, but I regret it immensely. I am sorry.
Ah, memories. Is that why you wrote your books, to preserve your memories? Is that why you chose to omit our first entanglement, to forget the hurt that came with that specific encounter? Was reliving that specific memory too painful? Was it easier to forget your father and his unavenged blood? How dare you. You insult your father's memory. Running away from the past, like a coward. How can you live like you do, knowing your father's killer still lives? Why was the fearful blood lust I saw in your eyes that day absent in every other of our clashes?
No, Mr. Whiskers, don't touch. That's not a toy, leave her alone. Go play with your brothers. I will feed you later. Run along now.
Did I enjoy your books? What a difficult question. Did I enjoy reliving my defeats? Did I enjoy having your victories over me rubbed in my face? Did I enjoy reading all these stories, knowing how each and every one would end, down to the very detail?
I despised you, Ms. Do. That is no secret. And for awhile I despised your books. Several copies served me as fuel for my fireplace. Oh, how I hated how Daring Do would always find a way to defeat the dreaded Ahuizotl against all odds. How I hated her confidence, her smugness, her recklessness, her self righteous attitude.
And yet...I found myself coming back. For every copy I destroyed in anger, I bought another. Acquiring these books secretly was no simple task, I assure you. I knew how every story would end, I was there after all, but the ways you painted each scene drew new details I had not noticed before. Experiencing our clashes from your side may not have provided me with anything exploitable, but it was most definitely insightful and, I must admit, quite entertaining.
The series grew on me as I continued through it. You have a gift, Ms. Do. You are an excellent writer. There were times when I had forgotten who I was and sat on the edge of my chair in suspense. Some nights I went without sleep as I made empty promises to myself, just one more chapter, just one more chapter. Silly, isn't it? It gets worse.
And as the series grew on me, so did Daring. Her recklessness and overconfidence became...endearing. I began to recognize the cleverness in her quips and appreciate her particular sense of humor. Your jokes are far funnier when I can spare the time to enjoy them. She was brave and bold and oh so strong willed. Her tenacity was admirable, and her determination was inspiring. The way she fought was like a dance, graceful and in rhythm. She was a strong, beautiful mare, deserving my respect. Yes, I Ahuizotl reluctantly, begrudgingly, gave my respect to Daring Do.
And now you lay here, at my feet, cold and unfeeling. Can you feel my finger against your cheek? Can you feel me stroking your mane? How does it feel, my fingers running through your soft lovely hair? Will you protest? Will you lift your hoof and push me away? Will you ask me to continue? Say something, anything, please...
What happened to the pony in your books? Where is the pony who stole the Sapphire Statue right out of my hands? Where is the pony who captured the Griffin's Goblet? Where is she who defeat me so soundly so many, many times? She would not have fallen here. She would not have allowed something as mundane as an arrow stop her.
Where is the mare I've read so much about? Where is the mare that commanded my respect? Where is the mare whose company I would never admit enjoying? Where is the mare I fell in love with? Where. Is. Daring Do?
Are you nothing but an imposter, a body double perhaps? Will I turn around and see that magnificent pony behind me, crouched and ready for battle. Will she wait for me to first finish my soliloquy and turn before attacking, just so she can see my expression of surprise? Her description of it will be hilarious, no doubt. I am turning, Daring Do! Prepare yourself, for I am turning!
...she's not there. You're not there. No, you're here instead, at my feet. What a hopeless notion.
Perhaps...perhaps you are not actually gone. Are you simply playing, waiting and listening and silently laughing at these secret words I speak? Are you waiting for the perfect opportunity, waiting for the right time to strike? Here, here is my neck. Your hoof is on my neck. It won't take much to incapacitate me. What more are you waiting for?
...no, I cannot believe this. I can't believe you're gone. I can't. I won't. Get up, Daring Do. Get up and fight me, please. Our encounters are all I live for now. I need this. I need you. Get up, please.
Please...why won't you get up?
I was looking forward to the next book. I look forward to all of them, really. I couldn't wait to learn of how you would escape my elaborate trap, to see how you would win against all odds. How long must I wait now for the next installment? Why must you delay the next release like this? Why are you letting down your fans like this?
No, I am being too harsh. You've been working so hard on these books, I have no right to complain. I imagine writing is a stressful occupation, you do not need unappreciative fans making such unreasonable demands. I am reasonable. You, my dear author, deserve a break, yes, a brief hiatus. I can wait. We can all wait.
How does a vacation sound, Ms Do? We should visit the eastern lands. I hear the Lazarus Pit is quite lovely this time of the year. Perhaps we should act upon that little rumor on the Savior's Grail on the way there. And afterwards we can visit those shifting sands, where that mysterious alchemist and his mystical stone dwell. Does that not sound wonderful?
Oh, of course I know such things are nothing but myths and old mare tales. But then again, so was the Radiant Shield of Rasdon. So was the Amulet of Atonement and Quetzalcoatl. So was I.
Come along, Ms. Daring Do, for we have much distance to travel and I do not wish to delay. We will see each other very soon. I will make sure of it.
Come quickly, Ms. Daring Do. We have a story to continue.
...This Is Not The End...
An Alternative Path: Lamentation for a Villain
An Alternative Path: Lamentation for a Villain
"Gonna have to try harder than that!" the mare laughed as she leaped to the side. The arrow flew harmlessly into the wall and clattered onto the floor.
"What's the matter, Ahuizotl?" Daring Do mocked as she tore open a small pouch hanging from her neck and split its contents. Formidable painted stallions armed with bows and spears found themselves dancing around the chamber as marbles rolled underhoof. "No death trap today? Or was that big pit in the other room suppose to be your big huzzah?"
The blue creature before her hissed and clutched the silver idol in his hands closer. "Stop her, you fools!" he screamed at his disoriented guards struggling to their feet. "Stop her, or you shall all suffer my wrath. The idol must not leave this place until the stars align!"
"Sorry, Ahuizotl-"
The creature had enough time to blink before the Pegasus appeared in front of him and placed a painful kick into his gut. The silver statue fell out of his grip and into Daring's outstretched hoof. She immediately deposited the statue into her pith helmet for safekeeping and set it back upon her head.
"-but I've got a schedule to keep. We'll have to stargaze on some other date."
Daring Do's smile grew as Ahuizotl knuckles paled as he tightened his fists. His entire body seem to quiver in rage. Ah, the teasing moments were her favorite part of these little adventures. A pity she rarely had time to enjoy them, Daring thought, noting the guards creeping up from behind her.
She sprung into the air, and with a few strokes of her powerful wings, she was hovering well above the reach of the thugs. Her exit in the form of a large ritualistic hole in the fortress ceiling caught her eye, and she sped towards it.
The warriors rushed forward, trying the best to stop or at least delay Daring's escape. Spears and knives and rocks were thrown haphazardly into the air. A particularly large stone crashed against the giant stone pillar in the center of the chamber. It wobbled for a minute before collapsing, and soon the rest of the mighty fortress began to shake. The guards looked to each other nervously, no longer concerned of their master's shrill orders to capture the escaping Pegasus.
Fresh air. Daring took a deep breath of the cool evening air as she hovered over the crumbling temple. "Another day, another dungeon," she whispered to herself. Landing on a cliff overlooking the temple, she allowed herself a brief rest and watched as Ahuizotl's fortress disappeared, leaving behind a ruin.
"Better luck next time, Ahuizoti!" she called, waving toward the giant pile of rubble and waiting for her last bit of reward. If it were anyone else beside Ahuizotl, Daring might have felt some guilt from taking so much pleasure in another's misfortune. Oh, but hearing the mad creature's screams of frustration, and his tantrums felt too good to be a sin. It was so hilarious, hearing his empty threats and useless rage.
It was adorable really, how hard the villain tried. Maybe one day she'd let the poor thing have a small victory. Nah.
Daring suddenly leaped into the air and spun around, her hooves up and ready. The ambush she had expected was not there. There were no tigers or panthers or leopards or kittens with switch-knives. Daring quickly scanned the treetops; perhaps an aerial assault. No, nothing there either.
Confused, she settle back down. Why did she feel so on edge then, she wondered. She wasn't in any immediate danger. She wasn't in any potential danger. What could possibly be the problem? Daring looked back to the ruins. Odd, Ahuizotl should have sworn revenge by now...
Ah, that was it. The silence, the lack of embittered wailing, the absence of enraged screams. What was taking Ahuizotl so long? What was he planning?
"Hey, honey? Are you alright?" Daring called toward the rubble. "Need a hoof?"
She expected to see a weak wave of a fist, to hear a groan. She received no answer.
"Tch, if you're not going to do anything, I'm going home!" she yelled. "No, serious. Say something funny otherwise this next book's gonna flop," she added a little quieter.
Daring began to pace, a universal sign of deep thought. Her pacing was interrupt every so often by a quick glance toward the former fortress.
"Okay, on one hoof this idea is total stupid," she muttered. "This is a trap and you know it. On the other hoof, I can't end a story like this. That's boring. Though I could always make something up, I guess," Daring considered, rubbing her chin. A second later she shook her head. "Nah, I can't make this stuff up. Ahuizotl's rants are a classic. They're too precious. No author could copy his style correctly." She sighed. "It's a trap. I know it's a trap. I'm falling into an obvious trap."
Daring took to the air and flew towards the ruined temple. She landed on one of the larger pieces. If a hand suddenly burst from beneath all the debris to grab at her, she would not have been surprised.
"Alright, Ally, you wanna play hide and seek, huh? This couldn't wait 'til morning?"
Silence answered her.
"Are you seriously playing hard to get? I'm telling you, that doesn't work for me."
Silence answered her.
Daring released a groan and began to shift rocks. "Stupid lazy monkey-cat-monster-thingy, making me dig him out..."
The small pile of rubble she had pushed aside grew. Pile became piles as Daring Do left her first dig site to another. And another.
"Archeology is very delicate work," Daring muttered in a high pitched mockery of her old professor. "You must always be careful, least you risk damaging valuable ancient artifacts." Another stone was tossed unceremoniously to the side. "Delicate my flank."
She wiped off the sweat from her brow and considered removing her soaked vest. The pith helmet would stay on however, especially considering how bright the sun was shining.
Wait, sun?
Daring looked up. There it was, that bright yellow orb.
"Huh, how long have I been out here?" She stifled a yawn and kicked at the debris. "Heh, too long, I know that mu-"
There! A dusty blue hand! Daring's eyes flew open and she jumped back. The hand did not reach for her neck or curl into a fist or even wave. It simply sat there, amidst the rocks.
Daring Do hesitated. She started forward, then immediately pulled back. "Come on, girl," she growl to herself. "You've come this far. I'm ready for anything. You hear that, Ahuizotl?" Daring shouted. "I'm ready for anything you try to pull!"
She began her task slowly at first, with all the finesse of a surgeon, carefully shifting debris to the side. Her patience soon wore thin, however, and rocks quickly filled the air as Daring threw them away in every direction, until, finally, the rest of Ahuizotl's curious blue body had been excavated.
"Well...well..." Daring huffed, catching her breath. "Well...what do you have to say for yourself, hmm? Making me do all this work before breakfast?"
Apparently nothing; Ahuizotl didn't even stir.
"Oh, the silent treatment now? Real mature."
A finger twitched! Daring leaped into the air, ready for action, just as the passing breeze died away, as did the movement she thought she saw.
"H-hey, Ally? You sleeping?" Cautiously, she approached. "You know, you kinda look like a large stuffed animal when you sleep. Did you know that? Well, anything to say?"
Daring took another tentative step closer. "Still nothing? Did this idol really mean that much?"
She stood right next to the unmoving creature now. Again, she began to pace, muttering to herself.
"If you wake up right now, we'll both be starting some awful days," she said, leaning forward. None to gently she push Ahuizotl's unmoving body onto his back and set an ear on his chest. She blinked and rubbed the inside of her ear, trying to banish any obstructing wax. She lean forward again.
"This is where your heart is, right? 'Cause I can't hear...well..."
Daring lifted her head and moved closer, dangerously closer, to Ahuizotl's face and listened.
"No breathing...no heartbeat...diagnosis..."
Daring pushed away and closed her eyes. She sighed. "Well, you can probably guess the diagnosis, huh?"
Her lips twisted into a small, humorless smile. "Never thought it'd end like this. Call me naive but I was kinda hoping for a happy ending. You know, hero saves the world, gets the boy, yadda yadda yadda. Man, and I had this entire redemption arc planned out. Heh, guess it was never meant to be.
"I have no idea what I'm going to tell my publisher. Can't exactly say, oh the villain's dead so no more adventures oh and by the way it was all real." Daring sat back down, next to her most dreaded foe. "Don't worry, I'll think of something.
"I don't think I'll stop writing. Maybe I'll start a new series, sci-fi or mystery or..." Daring suddenly grinned devilish at the body next to her. "How does erotica sound?"
She laughed, a short barking sound. "Ha, me, write romance. Well, it definitely won't be based off my own experiences, so you've got nothing to worry about."
The laughter faded. A shadow fell over Daring's features, and she grew solemn. "I'm going to miss Daring Do," she said. "I'll miss the adventures, the danger..." She set a hoof in the limp hand of her most hated enemy.
"I think I'm going to miss you most of all," Daring whispered, blinking away tears before they could grow heavy and fall. "I'm not the kind of pony who lives in the past, not after...well, our first tango...but I'll never forget you, our time together, I promise.
"Thanks, Ahuizotl, for making this all possible."
Daring Do brushed her lips against her villain's wide forehead, then pressed her lips against his.
"Good bye."
The End
