Twilight Sparkle becomes a pancake
Twilight was once a majestic creature, loved and celebrated by the many citizens that inhabited Equestria. She had saved the world on many accounts, and had been the center of ridiculous shenanigans many a time. She was certain no-pony had ever come close to the level of adventure experienced in her life; Friendship, tragedy and perilous quests all had their part in Twilight’s life.
However, no matter what her life amounted to, or how many lives she might have saved in her short time in this world, nothing could stop the inevitable fate racing towards her. And there she lay, stewing in a shallow pool of boiling butter, slowly frying as she came to her senses. Her once beautiful mane replaced with the slowly forming sludge of Insta-Cake Pancake Mix. The familiar scent of raisin that followed every pony of her color shrouded in sickly sweetness.
“I’m a pancake…” Twilight spoke, but no-one would hear her words.
The instant she realized, thoughts and questions began racing through Twilight’s mind.
“Why now? How could this have happened? Wasn’t I supposed to be immortal? Where the hay is spike?” She was in complete shock, judgement clouded by the fact that she was now a pancake. She had no place to turn for answers, no-pony who would be able to listen to her in this time of need. She was a pancake. Confusion turned to anger; An Alicorn-turned-pancake looking for a solution in a world where no friends are there to turn to. Blame manifested itself into Twilight’s psyche, forcing newer, deeper thoughts.
“This must be the work of discord, or even Nightmare Moon! I never trusted Luna, anyway. Sister to a complete bitch. It was Celestia who corralled me into this life of celibacy, and now I’ll never get the chance to grind on some sweet pole. I envy Applejack…” Twilight was so blinded by her rage, and the depth of her thought, that she didn’t notice the purple dragon making his way down the stairs. It was only when her name was called out by him that she pulled herself from her one-pony conversation.
“Twilight…? Twilight?!” Spike called through the library, and unsurprisingly, didn’t get a response. It’s not like this was uncommon. There wasn’t a week when Twilight wouldn’t get up extra early to see the morning fog, or even catch a glimpse of the fabled ‘Morning Duck’, so Spike didn’t particularly worry.
Spike began his morning rituals for when Twilight is out of the house. He stumbled lazily over to the sofa which he’d spent many nights coaxing Twilight from when her drunken stupors had gone too far. Slumping down into it, he realized he’d forgotten the weed. As a point of his morning rituals was to relax, and start the day with a breath of fresh smoke, the depressants were clearly paramount in this situation. However, it was then – as he sauntered into the kitchen – did Spike see the thing he and Twilight had been fearing for years. As baking mix was deemed punishable by death many years ago, the pancake laying on the table could only mean one thing.
“NOOOOO!” Spike dropped to his knees, instantly realizing what situation he, and most importantly, Twilight, was in. His one true friend had fallen, only to be transmogrified into a sweet, sweet pancake. A veil of tears was draped over Spike’s eyes, and yet, he couldn’t stop himself from pathetically crawling over to the tanned desert. He was shaking, completely unprepared to deal with this horrible fate his good friend had met. He knew what he would soon have to do… and dreaded it.
After hours of crying, Spike had pulled himself together, and was ready to perform the sacred ritual bestowed to any whose friends have been touched by the ungodly finger of the Pancake. Taking Twilight’s now tanned, crispy body, Spike rolled it up. Applying the apple jam, sugar and butter, Spike shoved the pancake into his mouth. With one sudden motion, Twilight, and everything she stood for was obliterated, traveling through the intestines of a baby dragon.
Spike lay there for a moment on the cold kitchen floor, contemplating what he'd just done. Before he could even begin to delve into the fact that Twilight was a pancake, his eyes were quickly caught by a strange purple glow. A glow that scared him more than anything had in a long time, as this ominous illumination was actually being emitted from his stomach.
"Pan... cake... po... wer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" A familiar booming voice erupted from Spike's glowing abdomen and echoed through the library. This was literally the scariest thing any living being had experience before in Equestria. This was not foretold in the ancient prophecies, and that uncertainty shook Spike to his core.
In an instant, a crack rang out as Spike's body arched backward. His mouth agape, and eyes wide, the baby dragon witnessed a body of purple magical essence spew out of his very own mouth. Waves of this colorful substance continued to pour out of the poor dragons body. Fortunately, it was over rather quickly, leaving Spike unharmed, but in a heap on the floor, exhausted.
"Hi there Spike, miss me?" A voice Spike knew only too well rang out, and something inside him snapped in sudden realization of what was before him. Looking up, the being looking down with a kind eye managed to both terrify and relieve him.
A giant pancake floating a few inches from the ground. The sight was certainly something new. Wings akin to those of Twilight's protruded from it's back, as did a single, glowing horn at the front.
This... this is what the legend stated. Prophecies told of a mysterious creature of Circular proportions would reveal itself to us. A deity. A god. This is what would help the ponies bring true harmony to the land. This is the beginning. This is 2014.
And with that, it was gone. And Spike was happy. He lost a good friend. But he gained something much more. He gained a pancake.
Author's Note
My creative talents are not wasted.
