"Quack." Wait...WHAT?

by -Serpent-

Rating: everyone
Tags: Princess Cadance, Comedy, Random, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Main 6, Other, Princess Luna
Length: 1370

A duck finds himself in the royal dungeons. This cannot be good...

When a duck named Fluffy Feather wakes up in the royal dungeons, everything goes crazy. She brings the attention of the Princesses and the Elements of Harmony, the most powerful ponies in Equestria. This...cannot be good. At all...

Published 2014-05-31 18:30:06 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-31 18:30:06 UTC

"Quack? Quack. Quack! QUACK!"

Fluffy peered up at the bars, uncertain.

"Quack?" she said, wondering how she got here. The duck walked around, examining her surroundings. She nipped at moldy cheese, banged on an iron door, and batted the iron bars. Fluffy had the sudden urge to let go of the flow, so she sat on the cheese and did her business. She wandered around some more, and started playing with the items in the room. There were all kinds of rubbish, and she quacked happily. The duck heard footsteps approaching from the other side of the room. Fluffy sniffed the air. It smelled like pony. Like a dirty pony. Fluffy looked at the intruder. It was a huge, smelly, brown pony, towering above her, smiling. Fluffy's mouth opened, and she stood there, terrified. The dirty pony cackled, and grabbed her by her feathery tail. He grinned some more, and started pulling off Fluffy's feathers.

"QUACK!" she honked, as loud as she could, and started biting the dirty pony. The dirty pony recoiled, and started screaming. Fluffy quacked some more, and suddenly, as if by magic, the whole place started to get filled with noise and screaming. The duck looked up at the dirty pony, who was cowering in the corner. She shrugged, and honked some more.

***

It was a usual morning for the Princess, and all of Equestria. Celestia woke up, raised the sun, and set to doing usual duties of the day. Little did she know that she would have the worst day of her life this beautiful sunny morning, and she would meet someone even more powerful than her and the Elements of Harmony put together. Sadly, it was no Luna. It was no Chrysalis. It was something much, much worse. As the Princess combed her shimmering mane, she thought of what it would be like to have something exciting happen, something not on her schedule.
Celestia yawned, and moved onto combing her tail. She usually did both her mane and tail with magic, but she had grown bored of it, just like everything else. She wished she could go on an adventure with her sister, like old times. But Equestria needed ruling, and that was her job. She was envious of her sister, who could roam free in her stars, and didn't have to be the leader of Equestria, unlike her.

The Princess's thoughts moved on to Twilight and her friends. My student is lucky, she's still young, and doesn't have even have to think of taking over my job for many more years to come.
As she was flying down to the Royal Dining Room to eat breakfast, she heard commotion coming from what seemed to be the Royal Dungeon. Princess Celestia sighed, and took a detour towards the dungeon. She departed down the magical stairs to the jail cells, to see what was going on.

She was nearly deafened when she opened the large platnium door with her magic. The noise was not like any other she had heard. There was quacking, screaming, shouting, hollering, singing, dancing, and kittens mewing. The Princess's mouth hung open, and she fainted, her mind a mixture of awe, surprise, and craziness.

***

Fluffy suddenly saw the huge door open, and behind it....was a beautiful shimmery pony. "QUAAAAAAAACK!!!!!" She started honking and dancing, and the other prisoners followed suit. A chubby blue pony with scissors for a cutie mark even started singing. Just then, the duck suddenly realized that she could step through the bars of the prison cell, and she quacked happily, doing so. She was free! The evil dirty pony could hurt her no more! Then, Fluffy started walking to the shimmery pony, who looked like she was constipated. She giggled, nearly falling over from laughter. The duck regained her balance, and continued towards the beautiful shimmery pony.

***

Princess Celestia stood, wide-eyed, watching Fluffy, who was waddling to her. She did not know what to do. All her years, she had never encountered a scenario like this. Suddenly, she knew what to do. The Princess smiled, "Hello, little duckling! Would you like anything to eat? Some bread perhaps? Or some cheese? Would you like a place to sleep?"

"Quack. Quack? Quack quack quack quack????" Fluffy replied. She looked up at the Princess keenly, waiting for an answer.

"I'm sorry, I do not understand your language, little duck. As I said before, would you like some food?" Celestia said, peering down at the duckling. Fluffy quacked again, getting frustrated, "Quack....quack quack quack?"

Princess Celestia facehoofed, and tried asking again and again, but with no success. She finally couldn't take it anymore. Celestia fired a spell at Fluffy, who started getting bigger, and...

...a huge yellow fluffy elephant was standing before The Princess, looking at her derpily. "Whaaaat?!?!"

Princess Celestia started to panic. That spell was supposed to turn the duck into a pony, not a elephant! Celestia started running around the dungeon, her mind an explosion of madness. She was about to give up, go back into the castle, and leave the elephant, but suddenly, the ELEMENTS OF HARMONY burst inside the dungeon, wearing their magic garments, with a look of first determination, and then horror on their faces.

Twilight Sparkle suddenly exclaimed, "Princess Celestia! We were looking all -" The purple alicorn suddenly stopped mid-sentence, and fainted. Rainbow Dash took her place. "Yeah, yeah, yeah, we were looking for you, but I see you need our help! And Twilight is too shocked her mentor is crazy...so-"

"-Wait a second there, sugarcube! Did ya just call Princess Celestia cray-cray? Now why in the hay would you do that? Ah don't understand." Applejack cut in, glaring at Rainbow. The cyan pegasus beckoned to Celestia, who was running around in circles mumbling things like 'fried chicken' and 'enchiladas'. Applejack fainted too, falling next to Twilight.

Pinkie Pie glanced over at Princess Luna. "Hello!" she grinned.

"When did Luna get here?" Rainbow Dash questioned, glancing around suspiciously.

"There is no need for thee to be suspicious. Thee hath not seen me teleport here, young child." Luna responded.

"HEY, I'M NOT A CHILD!" Rainbow yelled, frowning.

Just then, Fluttershy jumped on top of the fluffy elephant, and hugged it. "Ilikefluffyelephants!!" she exclaimed, and fainted. Now, three out of the six elements of harmony were unconscious. This wasn't good.

Rarity was near fainting also. She collapsed on the dungeon floor, muttering about the dirtiness of the jail. Now, it was up to only Rainbow Dash, Princess Luna, and Pinkie Pie to make things right. Of course, Celestia was still there, but she was running around screaming about enchiladas and fried chicken, so she didn't really count.

The three ponies stood in awe, looking at the huge fluffy yellow elephant that was formerly a duck. This former duck had caused so much trouble...but why? They did not know.

"Princess Luna, could you turn the duck into a pony? We might be able to understand it..." Rainbow Dash suggested.

"HEY! Rainbow Dash couldn't say that!" Pinkie Pie claimed, looking at 'Rainbow Dash'.

"Are you calling me stupid?!" said pony growled, looking at Pinkie Pie with a face of hatred.

Just then, the fluffy yellow elephant that was formerly a duck spoke. "My friends, we must be wary. There is a changeling around..."

Rainbow Dash fainted.

"YOU TALKED!!!!!" Pinkie Pie screamed, pointing a hoof accusingly at the fluffy yellow elephant who had formerly been a duck.

"Of course I did." she calmly answered, pushing Pinkie's hoof to the ground.

Just then, Luna ate a bagel.

The fluffy yellow elephant turned back into a duck, Princess Celestia got a bucket of water poured on her head, and all the ponies on the ground became conscious again.

"Who is thee, duckling?" Luna asked commandingly.

"I am..." She started...

"Go on!" Rainbow Dash commanded.

With a flash of white, the duck turned into these ponies' mortal nemesis...

Discord.

Author's Note

The story you all have been waiting for is here!

This was really fun to write. :derpytongue2:

Please tell me if you liked it or not, if I should change it or not, and if I should write more derp stories like this!

-Serp