The Cutie Mark Crusaders Try Cocaine For The First Time

by -MahLeetlePanties-xD

Rating: mature
Tags: Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Random, Derpy Hooves, Main 6, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1203

The girls try a magical substance!

Scootaloo has found something magical! SHe only had to pay 20$ for a magical bag of "Sugar"! She shows her friends and it all goes down hill from there....

Published 2014-01-14 02:50:12 UTC
Last updated 2014-01-14 02:50:12 UTC

Sugar Trip

The Crusaders finally drink their Kool-aid...But something just doesn't seem right. Their eyes get blood shot and they start to hilusonate....

"This sugar taste funny guys....." says Sweetie Belle in a slow deep voice.

"WHATS WRONG WITH YOUR FUCKING FACE!!! OMG AHHHHH!" yells Scootaloo as she waves her arms around in the air like a fucking idiot.

"Why are we in the forest....Where did this giant dick come from?!" says Apple Bloom as she giggles like a dumb ass.

They sat there for atleast 3 hours saying dumb ass stuff...But finally they got up and left the tree house to go for a walk. Everyone one they passed by looked at them like they were crazy mentally retarded goat shafts. They ran into Apple Jack and she stared at them suspicously and imedaitly knew what the fuck was going on!

"Scootaloo...Why are your eyes so red....and why do you look so weird...!?" asks Apple Jack in confusion.

"There..There..Was this mother fucker..That was like..Hey mother fucker..Can i fucker your mother fucker fucking fuck." Says Apple Bloom while derping everywhere.

"Oh! You were swimming and there was alot of clorene!? I thought so! Well godd bye you stupid cunt face!" says Apple Jack at she Beef Curts her sister and leaves.

They just walk on like nothing happened...Suddenly all of their tummies start to growl. They had "The Munchies"

DUN DUN DUN DUN!!!!!!!

The Munchies....

After walking around for a while they started to get "The Munchies..." so they stopped by the bakery to get some kick ass Urinal Cake. As they walked in the bakery they got some really strange looks from everyone in the bakery. They decided to cuss at everyone they saw for the rest of the day. They sat down at a table and waited for the stupid ass waiter to come and get their order.

"Hello how may i take your fucking order?" asks the waiter.

"I would like three Urinal cakes you stupid faggot..." says Scootaloo as she gives the waiter the finger.

This turned into a huge argument....

"Fuck off, man mattress. I hope you get fucking raped. " says the waiter in a mad voice.

"By the time you discover how not to be a panda pounder, it will be practically a few days too late. You fucking bitch." says Sweete Belle as she giggles.

"Go fuck your sister, you fucker." says the waiter in a in raged voice.

"Already did cunt. Know why you have urinary tract infection? Because you're a neo-conservative shit stain." says Apple Bloom as she farts in her hand and throws it in the waiters face.

"Why you little shit im gonna kick your little ass!" yells the waiter.

"Just try it and do me a favor while your at it. Come over to my house and drizzle some feces on your aunt, I heard that fuckface thinks it's swell." says Apple Bloom.

"You need a swift kick to the ass!" yells the waiter.

"Drink a can of placenta, you cunt." says all three of them as they walk out of the store.

"Do me a favor and get raped by a cheerleader, you fucking pillow humper!" the waitress says as she shoots them the finger.

The crusaders did not get anything to eat...Little did they know...That the sugar that man gave them made them want to eat eachother. Later that day they all went back to the tree house. Scootaloo kept on drooling while looking at Apple Bloom. Scootaloo grabs the salt and a knife and hides it in her back fat.

"Hey Apple Bloom come back here with me." says Scootaloo as she points to the bathroom of the tree house while twitching.

When they get in the bathroom Scootaloo hits her in the head with a ball sack that she cut off of a stupid faggot. Apple Bloom instantly falls down and passes out. First thing Scootaloo did was cut off Apple Blooms hoofs and put them into a bowl. After that she Scalped her and chopped her mane up and used it as parsley. Then to top it all off she cut off her Cutie Mark and put it on as the topping of her salad..You know because shes on a diet. Finally she stabs Apple Bloom 79 times in the face and cut her head off and threw her out the window. She walked back into the room and licked the bloody mess off of her fingers when suddenly a chainsaw cut her torso in half.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screams Scootaloo.

Sweetie Belle was chopping her up into bite sized pieces while reading a cook book called "How to cook a dumb ass irredeemable slut infidel pony." she was finished chopping her up and got a frying pan and started to fry the little pieces. This recipe was called "Scrotum stain and nipple scab soup." after she fried that up she put it in a sauce pan on low heat with a couple of nipple scabs and half a cup of milk. After letting that boil down she pissed into a cup and poured it into the soup. It was finally finished. She poured it into a bowl and added a beautiful ball of pubic hair to top off her soup. She gulped it down and then wend outside and shot her self.

-Never try cocaine kids.

The Creepy Man In The Alley With Sugar!

One sunny morning Scootaloo was going for a walk while listening to "We cant stop" by Miley Cyrus. She stopped at every building and wall twerked. Sometimes she even went inside and twerked on peoples faces. Of course every body hates Miley Cyrus so they all punched that bitch in the face. While Scootaloo twerked on the side of the bakery a strange man whispered from the alley.

"Hey kid i got what you need....I got the good stuff." said the creepy old child molester as he held up a bag of ilegal substances.

"Oooooh sugar! I do need some of that! I was just about to go back to the tree house and make some kool-aid!" yelled Scootaloo in excitment.

"Here ya go..I just need you to pay 20$." Exclaimed the old man as he scratches his nut sack.

"Okay sir!" says Scootaloo.

"HEY COME BACK THIS IS JUST A BUNCH OF TAINT ROLLED UP INTO A BALL!" yells the old man.

Scootaloo runs off back to the tree house while twerking at every stop. While she made her way back to the tree house Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle were tagging up some buildings around Ponyville. They wrote some really disturbing things on the Library where Twilight lives. That's because they fucking hate her stupid ass. Later they both returned to the tree house too see that Scootaloo was making some Kool-aid.

"Yu-ummy! Grape is my favorite flavor!" yells Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom.

"I got the good kind of sugar from some creepy old perverted guy with an erection in the alley." says Scootaloo as she pours three glasses of Kool-aid.

Scootaloo hands them their glasses and they propose a toast.

"A toast to being so fucking awesome!" They yell as they cling together their glasses.