Err... I had fun with this. xD
"Now, our guest tonight is uhh... quite a peculiar one." Jeremy Clarkson looked at the camera with a face of genuine confusion, cocking an eyebrow up as his eyes seemed to move aimlessly in thought. "But, regardless, we're quite excited to have her here! Are you familiar with a show called 'My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic'?" He turned to a member of the crowd behind him, holding his hand out in question. The member nodded, much to his delight.
"Oh! So, are you aware of the fandom that consists of grown men who watch the show, and buy its merchandise aswell?" He questioned further.
"Yes, I'm actually one of those men." The crowd member smiled, somewhat embarrassed when he admitted it.
"O-oh." Jeremy Clarkson muttered, turning back to the camera in semi-shock as he sighed. "Okay then."
The large audience gave a small chuckle, very much similar to your everyday sitcom.
"Well, he's going to be happy. Why? Because, much to many scientist's bewilderment, a character from the tv cartoon 'My Little Pony' has appeared on our very soil. Who?" He gave the crowd one last look to add to the effect. "Ladies and gentleman, the alicorn of night! Princess Luna!"
The audience applauded as a spotlight shone over to the darkness, revealing Luna herself as she trotted over to the show's host. Jeremy gave an exaggerated bow, much to the amusement of both the audience and Luna.
"Welcome, Luna! How do you find Earth so far?" Jeremy asked as he signaled for her to sit on the couch. He took his seat across her right after.
"Well, everything is very... er, fast paced. Atleast, when you compare it to my homeland." She stated as she sat on the sofa. "I mean, nopony here even bothers smiling to one another. It's a little unsettling, but there's always room for improvement." Luna smiled.
"Nobody, you mean." Clarkson pointed out with a grin.
"Oh, right. Nobody. Excuse my terminology, I'm still working on it." She smiled, slightly embarrassed.
"No no, not a problem dear! Also, very true words, what you just said. Sometimes it takes a cartoon from another world to show us just how unpleasant we can be sometimes." He pursed his lips as he raised his eyebrows, the audience chuckling lowly. "Now, how much time do you think before the federals burst in here and take you in for questioning?" He asked, half jokingly. He honestly wasn't sure himself if having a mythical being in the show would result in some type of trouble or not.
"Oh dear, honestly, I'm going to head right back home after this. How I even ended up here on the show was, well... it's quite the story to tell. I'll leave it at that."
"Ha, I'm sure of it. Would you care to share with us how exactly you ended up here? I mean, here as in, on Earth. Not the show." He chuckled.
"Well, I'm going to be honest, it was an accident which led me to being flung out here. See, the thing is my sister and I are currently housing two of your kind, although we're struggling with trying to find a way to get them back here. As I woke up here in your world, I began preparing my recall spell-" Luna paused as Jeremy held out a hand.
"Sorry, sorry, but did you just say spell? As in like, um-" He motioned his hand in circles trying to get the words out.
"Magic?" Luna offered.
"Yes!" Jeremy snapped his fingers.
"Precisely." Luna nodded. "Why?"
Clarkson could only cock an eyebrow as he placed his finger on his chin in a thoughtful manner. He then furrowed his eyebrows as a piece of Luna's statement echoed in his mind.
"Wait, did you just say you're housing two of our 'kind' in your homela-" He looked to his side to find a member of the camera crew mumbling a few words to him.
"We don't have much time, remember, she has to go back in a few minutes."
"Ah, right." Jeremy cleared his throat, pulling out a few pieces of paper from his coat. "Now, you took our Lacetti out for a hotlap and did some," He took a quick glimpse at his sheet of paper. "...rather fast times." He nodded, clearly impressed. "Considering you don't have hands or fingers to even handle the steering wheel well... or the gear shifter... this is actually mind boggling." The audience chuckled.
"Really?" Luna was actually amused, smiling.
"Yes! Who would like to see our very first mythical being around the track?"
The audience muttered a scrambled mess of 'yes', 'sure', and even a few 'woo!'.
"Play the tape." Jeremy faced the tv screen, everyone else following in suit.
The sound of tires screeching weakly and an engine being revved over the redline flooded the entire room.
"Oh! You were definitely ecstatic about it!" He laughed.
"I won't lie, it was the most fun I've had in a while." She admitted with a smile.
The footage was now showing the cockpit cam, her face fixed with pure focus as her mouth hung.
"And that focus, wow." He chuckled even more. "Are you sure you don't do this for a living?" He joked.
"Oh, we don't even have this kind of technological advantage in Equestria." She stated.
"Well you should, because you seem like a natural!" Jeremy complimented.
The footage showed her going flat out as she approached the hammerhead.
"Oh, but how did she handle the hammerhead? My goodness, you're coming in hot!" Jeremy was literally sitting on the edge of his seat at this point.
The car's wheels locked for a moment during braking.
"OH!" Jeremy shouted excitedly.
The car swung into the first turn as the tires screeched the entire time; going wide throughout the entire hammerhead. Her reaction to the turn was followed by a quick transition into the cockpit cam. "Errgh! I hate that damned corner!"
Luna gasped.
"Oh my, I wasn't aware they were going to put that in the footage!" Luna sounded worried, much to Jeremy's humor.
"That's fine, you didn't even cuss." He couldn't help but start a small laughing fit. "Oh, haha- did you actually just go flatout through the entire bentley?" He was still cackling. Luna rolled her eyes, smiling as she was finally warming up to the host's childlike behaviour.
"Yes, I did."
"Very impressive! Really! Oh, and there you go through the- WOW! Massive understeer through gambon! But, across the finish line regardless, and that was a fairly clean lap, Luna!" He looked back to the princess. "Now, let's find out just how well you did for driving a car the very first time ever in your existence!" He emphasized the last part of the sentence with a few bounces of his head. Slipping the time card out, he read it slowly.
"You did it... in..." He looked up to the princess, then back down with only his eyes. "One..."
Luna leaned in a bit.
"Yes?" She acknowledged.
"Forty..."
The audience audibly gasped.
"Yes?" Luna leaned in more.
"Sssssssseven..."
The audience members remained silent, though this time looking at one another with shock.
"Yes?" Luna was definitely eager to hear her time by now, her fore legs propping her up from the ground as her rear remained seated on the sofa. Jeremy tried holding his laughter behind his hand, but it was audible nonetheless.
"On the dot! Putting you right at," Jeremy stood up, looking for the proper position to place her name and lap time on the lap board, "10th! Your in the top 10! Spectacular job, no doubt about it!" He began clapping his hands. "Ladies and gentleman, princess Luna!" The audience clapped madly, cheering her on.
"YES! YYYES!" She flew up, clapping her hooves together in delight. Suddenly, she flew back down, looking concerned.
"Oh no. I'll just have to do it now." She spoke to herself.
"I'm sorry?" Jeremy asked, being unable to hear her over the audience's standing ovation. Suddenly, in a bright flash, she was gone. Everything went completely silent as he stood in shock, witnessing right in front of him for the first time in Earth's history the spell of a mythical being, in action.
"Wow." He muttered, looking around to see that everyone held equally shocked expressions. Then, after the sound of a door opening, the voice of a male spoke up; echoing through the cavernous show set. As everyone turned to face him, Jeremy recognized the man as the show's producer himself.
"That... was brilliant."
Author's Note
I don't even know what to say.
This was stupid, and fun at the same time.
And lol. This is just lol.
ALSO, for those of you who follow my other story "Dude, What the FFFF!!", did you catch the little reference? Read again if not : )
