It was a bright and sunny Tuesday morning in Ponyville, the sun was shining, birds were chirping, and Twilight’s slave was out running errands.
“Ugh this is ridiculous.” Spike grumbled to himself, “I sacrifice sleeping in every morning just so Miss Sparkle Butt can maintain her to-do list.”
Spike was greatly looking forward to his next errand however, an errand that got him some time with a certain dress maker. The little green and purple dragon rapidly came to the front door of the Carousel Boutique and gave it two swift knocks.
“Just a minute!” sang out an angelic voice from the other side. Just by hearing her voice spikes tummy was filled with butterflies. The door then opened revealing a very beautiful white unicorn. Spikes eyes turned into little hearts as he looked at her.
“Oh, hello Spike! What can I do for you?”
“Kiss my..err.. I mean, I’m just here for the dress Twilight ordered!” Spike blurted out.
“But of course little one!” gushed Rarity, “I’ll be right back!”
Ugh, little one. Spike hated it when Rarity referred to him as a child.
“If only I could prove to her that I can be grown up.” Muttered Spike to himself.
“What was that darling” Rarity said as she came back with the dress.
“Oh nothing!” sputtered Spike. “Thanks! Gotta go!” And with that Spike made his depressing retreat from the boutique. Somehow he had to get Rarity to pull her head out of her plot and actually notice him, but how?
Spike was approaching his final errand of the day, Sugar Cube Corner. He could feel the delicious aroma penetrate his nostrils, and fill his nose with glorious scents.
“Lets see.” Spike said to himself as he pulled out his checklist. “Twilight ordered two red velvet cupcakes with vanilla frosting, and eight peanut butter cupcakes with chocolate frosting!” Spikes mouth was beginning to water at the very mention of the delicacies.
Spike approached the front door and was getting ready to open it.
BAM
The door flew open revealing a very hyperactive pink pony on the other side who was singing a merry tune.
“Oh my name is Pinkie Pie! I made myself a cupcake! Ponies think I’m crazy! But I tell them to shove…”
“Pinkie!” called out a crippled Spike, interrupting Pinkie’s song. He was sprawled on the floor with his hands on his face.
“Oh hey Spikey Wikey!” greeted Pinkie. “Are you playing hide and seek? Cause I’ve already figured that hiding spot out.”
“No! You broke my face you pink idiot!” shouted Spike. “Well don’t just stand there! I need a doctor!”
(30 Minutes Later)
“How is he nurse?”
“Well Pinkie, that shot to the face did him a lot of damage.” Explained Nurse Redheart.
Pinkie had gotten Spike to Ponyville Hospital as fast as she could, minus the part where she tried to catch a butterfly for fifteen minutes. However, she got him there in time before any of his injuries got any worse. He is now laying in a bed with a strand of bandages that cover his entire face.
“Mphhh, grmphh, phumphh!” mumbled Spike.
“How long will the bandages stay on?” inquired Pinkie.
“Well the doctors have administrated the bandages with a new magic healing potion that should rebuild the bones, muscles and skin in his face.” Explained the nurse. “For it to have full effect the bandages need to stay on for a whole two hours.”
“Okie dokie lokie!” exclaimed Pinkie Pie. “Hey while we wait, I could tell you my whole life story!”
(2 Very Annoying Hours Later)
“And that’s how Ponyville was made!”
“Huh? What?” questioned Nurse Redheart as she woke up from her nap.
“Hey it’s been two hours!” shouted Pinkie. She eagerly burst into Spike’s room as a doctor was getting ready to cut off the bandages.
“Mind if I watch?” asked Pinkie.
“Ugh just don’t touch anything.” Grumbled the grumpy doctor. He then leaned in to make the first cut.
“Wait!” shouted Pinkie.
“What!?”
“Are you sure the patient has enough emesamensara?”
“I have no idea what that is.”
“Very well doctor, carry on.”
“May I?” The doctor then leaned in for the second attempt of the first cut.
“Hold it!”
“Ugh, what!”
“The readings on this brain meter are all wrong!” shouted Pinkie pointing towards a blank screen. “We must postpone the operation!”
“That is a television put here for the patients enjoyment.” Fumed the doctor. “And its not even plugged in to the wall!”
Observing the unplugged cord, Pinkie was satisfied.
“Correct you are doctor, proceed with the operation.”
“Gee, thanks.” The doctor began his third attempt.
“Wait!’
“Now what!?”
“I just wanted to say sorry for interrupting you before,” apologized Pinkie. The doctors left eye gave off a quick twitch.
With his fourth attempt the doctor began to cut off the bandages, they came off very quickly, revealing Spikes face.
As soon as the doctor made eye contact with the now un-bandaged spike, gave out a short gasp and fainted dead away. Nurse Redheart then came into the room.
“Time for you medicine mister…” The nurse looked up and saw the un-bandaged Spike. “Mister…mister…handsome!” And with that she wobbled slightly and fainted just like the doctor before her.
“Wait, what did she call me?” Asked Spike.
“Handsome.” Answered Pinkie. “But she spelled it wrong.”
“Quick! Hand me a mirror.”
Pinkie quickly scooped up a mirror and hoofed it over to Spike. He quickly grabbed it and began to examine his new mug.
“That nurse was right!” Exclaimed Spike as he saw his heroic chin and defined cheekbones. “I am handsome!”
“Spike, you’re not handsome.”
“…”
“You’re a hunk!”
Pinkie Pie, and a very excited Spike soon made their way back into Ponyville Towne Square. Immediately ponies where taking notice of Spikes newfound good looks.
“Ah! So handsome!”
“Hey good looking!”
“Wow Spike! The people of Ponyville really do appreciate a handsome face!”
“Haha, yeah I guess.” And then it hit him. This was the prefect opportunity to show rarity that he wasn’t a little baby!
“Make way citizens!” Spike bellowed. “I need to get to the Carousel Boutique!”
After a lot of sprinting Spike finally made it to the entrance of the Boutique. He then reached for the door handle, because handsome men don’t knock.
“Good luck Spike!” Pinkie called out.
“Psh, I don’t need…”
WHAM
Before he good grip the handle the door flew open straight into his handsome mug sending him flying into a nearby dumpster. Not aware of what just occurred, Rarity strolled out of her shop, with a garbage bag levitated by her magic. Just as she was ready to throw it into the awaiting dumpster she heard a groan come from inside of it.
She the looked in and gasped at what she saw.
“Spike!”
“Huh, what?” Spike opened his eyes to see Rarity staring down at him. This was it! Rarity was finally going to see that he was more than a little dragon!
“Spike, you’re…you’re…”
“Yeesss?”
“You’re, so…so…”
Moment of truth!
“You’re so filthy!”
“Well I was hoping you would…wait what?”
“Don’t worry dear, ill fix you right up!” Rarity then levitated Spike out of the dumpster and shot him with her clean spell, revealing a bright and shiny dragon.
“Don’t you notice anything different?” he asked desperately.
“Umm, nothing comes to my attention dear!” said Rarity. “Well I must be off!”
And just like that she was gone. Not gone, gone, just in her house gone.
“I don’t understand!” shouted Spike. “Why didn’t she notice!”
“Ooooh! Ooooh! I know!” shouted an exuberant Pinkie Pie.
“What! Tell me!”
“Maybe it’s because you’re not handsome anymore!”
“Not hand…?” Spike quickly scampered to a nearby window to look at his reflection. To his dismay, it was just like Pinkie had said. His big baby eyes, chubby cheeks, and undefined chin were back.
“Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!” Pinkie Pie approached the solemn Spike.
“I know this might not be a good time but, can I smell your armpit!?”