*Insert Apple Pun*

by Waldo the Digital_Hex

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Romance, Big Macintosh, Random, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 3552

After a hard morning of work, a sweaty Applejack makes her way to shower off. And who should she encounter other than Big Mac! A completely random Applecest done by yours truly, a spin-off to the Pounding Pumpkin series.

After a hard morning of work, a sweaty Applejack makes her way to shower off. And who should she encounter other than Big Mac!

A completely random Applecest done by yours truly, a spin-off to the Pounding Pumpkin series.
Takes place about 13 years after the current series, 3 years before One Pounded Pumpkin.

Published 2014-01-16 11:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-15 04:39:03 UTC

Chapter 1

*Insert Apple Pun*

Digital_Hex

Chapter 1

It all started like any other morning. It always does.

Applejack awoke before the sun, heading out to the fields with her hat held high and a skip in her step. Working on the farm was her passion, what she lived for. She wouldn't trade it away for anything.

She started her work with the day, beginning as it did. Usually, she ended with it as well.

Off in the distance, she saw her older brother, Big Macintosh, working the fields as well, the heavy yoke he always wore put to good use as he plowed a field of dead vegetation. Applejack felt herself staring off at him with a soft smile on her face. Her brother was so strong, so muscular, so...

Applejack shook her head.

No, brain, bad thoughts, she thought with a blush. Back to work.

But even as she continued working, the seed that had planted itself years ago continued growing.

She worked. She sweat. She teared up. She panted.

As the sun reached it's zenith in the sky, Applejack finished bucking the entire left side of the field she was working on for the day, a feat in itself. She wasn't satisfied, though.

As she trotted over to the shower hose on the side of the house, she couldn't help but wonder where Big Macintosh was. She was starting to miss him. She found herself starting to daydream, imagining his thick cords of muscles drenched in sweat, his coat ruffled from a hard day's work, the wafting smell of-

Applejack snapped back to reality, chastising herself instantly.

Ya ain't supposed to be thinking like that! 'T'ain't normal, stop it-

As Applejack turned a corner of the house, she saw many things at once.

First off, Big Macintosh was beneath the shower head, the water washing down his rippling form. Applejack already felt her face grow hot as she continued the visual treat against her best wishes.

Big Macintosh really was ripped. His muscles were sharp and defined, thick and powerful. He wasn't overly bulky like some ponies, but Applejack knew he could easily out perform a bigger pony in a heartbeat.

For lack of a better word, he was fragging sexy.

The water streaming down his face and body was not helping the situation any either. His straw blonde mane was flush against his face, his eyes closed as his head was tipped back. Then Applejack noticed something else. She looked around, almost disbelieving. Then she saw it.

Big Macintosh's yoke was sitting a slight distance away, resting against the side of the house. Applejack returned her gaze to Big Macintosh, face blazing red.

She hardly ever saw Big Mac without his yoke on. On the farm, around town, at the dinner table, he always had it on. Without it, he looked so... naked.

And she thought he looked even better without it.

She facehoofed. Why do I have to be thinkin these thoughts 'bout my brother now?

She turned, trying to trot back around the house, away from the hunk of a stallion that was her brother. Unfortunately, she tripped.

“OOF-” she called out right before she face-planted right into some mud. Blech.

Big Mac looked over, interrupted from his peaceful meditation. He looked right, then left, finally spotting Applejack unceremoniously sprawled out in the only patch of mud that side of the house. She was such a silly pony.

“Applejack... y'alright?”

Applejack groaned in the mud.

“Just fine, brother.”

“Then why're ya lyin' in the mud?”

Applejack had no response.

A few moments passed. The silence hung in the air with a heavy aura, growing more and more awkward until Applejack finally had the good sense to pull herself from the mud.

Big Macintosh stiffled a chuckle. Applejack's face was brown with the soupy mud, and it dribbled down her front as she sat down.

“C'mon,” Big Macintosh motioned her over, “Let's get'cha cleaned up.”

Applejack mumbled something incomprehensible to Big Mac before begrudgingly stumbling her way to Big Macintosh, grateful for the mask of mud on her face. It kept her growing blush hidden.

T'ain't fair, she pouted to herself as she sat down in front on Big Macintosh, feeling the cool shower water crashing against her back. Too cold. She shivered violently.

This water isn't just cold, it's freezing! How does he enjoy this?!

“Could ya at least turn up the water a tad bit? Ah know it's hot outside, but this is a bit too cold, don'tcha think?”

Big Macintosh cocked his head slightly, then shrugged. It all felt the same to him, anyhow. Might as well humour his sister.

Applejack cooed as the water grew warmer, until it was quite bearable. Big Macintosh smirked before turning the temperature up just a tad more.

“Looks like this year'll bring a good profit,” Big Macintosh said calmly as he pulled out a rag, turning Applejack around and dragging the rag down her face, taking off a layer of mud.

Applejack blushed freely, the mud no longer covering her scarlet face. The effect was not lost on Big Macintosh. He gave Applejack a curious look.

“Lil' sis, y'alright? Yer face is redder'n a tomato.”

Applejack shook her head vigorously.

“N-Nah, I'm fine!” she declared, holding up a hoof. It was trembling slightly.

Mac rolled his eyes. His sister was a terrible liar.

Although, he admitted with a tiny grin, it is kind of cute when she tries denying stuff. Like this. It's not really lying now, is it?

Big Mac calmly rubbed the mud off of the towel before wringing it out. Back to Applejack's face it went, removing more muck.

“Y'sure 'bout that?” he challenged evenly.

Applejack laughed in an extremely high-pitched tone.

“O-Of course!” she lied again.

Mac snorted. He wrung out the towel once more before leaning in towards Applejack.

“Wh-what are you do- Mac!” Applejack exclaimed before closing her eyes, Big Macintosh's face directly in front of hers. Her fantasies all ran rampant in her mind rapidly, outcomes running wild, until-

She felt Mac gently set his forehead against hers.

Applejack cracked open her eyes. Mac was looking at her forehead with a concerned look.

“Yer awfully hot there,” he remarked as he pulled away. “Ya sure y'ain't sick or nothin?”

Applejack shook her head side to side.

“Definitely not sick. Nope.”

Mac shrugged, accepting the answer. Applejack was a grown mare, and if she insisted she was fine then surely she was fine.

“If ya say so,” he commented before picking the rag back up. Flicking it free of a few speckles of mud, he held it out for Applejack. Giving Mac a confused look, she slowly took it from him.

“Are ya goin somewhere?” she asked curiously.

“Eeyup,” he said briefly.

Applejack couldn't tell due to his red hide, but his cheeks were stained just as flushed as his sister's were. He could handle wiping her face clean, that he could do. Keeping his composure during something as innocent as that was easy. But...

The steam was growing thicker in the shower room as the hot water cascaded along Applejack's form. Her coat was drenched in the steaming stream, and Mac knew that he needed to get out quick. He was getting too excited.

“Well, uh...” Applejack stammered. Mac flicked an ear towards her.

“I would appreciate it if, uh... well, ya know, it's...”

Applejack growled before rapping her forehead with a hoof.

“Gosh darnit, can ya finish cleanin me off?” she barked loudly.

Mac cocked an eyebrow.

“What?” he deadpanned.

Applejack flushed an even deeper scarlet, something that was not lost on Mac. He simply dismissed it as a trick of his mind, however. Surely she didn't harbour any feelings for him. She was probably still upset about her last coltfriend, what was his name? Whisper? Something strange like that.

“It's just,” she stammered as she tried to articulate what she was thinking up. “We really don't spend all that much time together anymore, y'know? So, uh... I'd appreciate it if ya stayed a little bit longer, helped me clean up a bit?”

She bit her bottom lip nervously as Macintosh mulled over what she'd just said.

Mare is flustered when talking to me. Mare wishes to spend time with me in shower. Mare does not want me to leave her in shower alone. Computing... Computing... Flag recognized. Preparing new route. Proceed with caution.

“I s'pose I could stay a bit longer,” he decided, taking the rag back from Applejack.

“Not sure what ya want me 'round for, though. Ya know I'm not much for conversations.”

Applejack giggled softly as he wiped along the side of her neck, his pressure soft and gentle.

“Yer company is enough, brother. I just feel like we don't spend enough time together, s'all.”

Yeah, beause the longer I spend with ya, the closer I am to bustin a nut... Much like right now actually.

Macintosh let out a cheeky chuckle as he made sure his back legs were tucked together a little tighter. He was definitely getting excited.

He cleaned the rag again before running it along Applejack's mane, trying to pull a clump of mud from along the hairs. He had the foreign matter trapped within the rag, all he had to do was pull it out.

Pressing down along her neck, Mac drove the mud out of Applejack's mane, pulling on her hair in the process.

The reaction was immediate. She let out a sharp mewl of pleasure before throwing her hooves to her mouth, eyes wide.

“I can't believe I just-” she gasped, looking anywhere but towards Macintosh. “S-Sorry...”

Mac, in his defense, honestly had not seen that coming. He stood frozen, trying to refute what just happened. The logical side of his mind was trying to make sense of it. He pulled a mare's mane, and she liked it.

Meanwhile, the reasoning part of his mind was working double time.

M-Maybe it was... Or maybe she... Well, uh... Buck.

Reason lost.

Mac snorted, returning to reality.

“S'alright,” he commented as he wrung out the towel. “It can't be helped if ya like it.”

Applejack began cracking a smile before she froze.

“And what's that supposed to mean?”

It's not you, Mac. Remember that.

“I mean,” he began, “it can't be helped if ya like having yer mane pulled. I hear lotsa mares like that.”

Applejack facehoofed.

“Yer so thick,” she whispered.

“What was that?”

“Nothing!”

Mac had heard her, though. His restraint was being tested.

He ran the rag through her mane again, but this time...

He rested the rag right at the base of her mane, griping it tightly before slowly yanking down playfully.

Applejack hissed in pleasure, back arcing.

“M-Mac! Stop that!”

Macintosh smirked. Yep, restraint was broken.

“Why? Ya seem to certainly be enjoying yerself.”

Applejack scowled at him.

“And ya don't seem to be too concerned about turning on yer own sister,” she deadpanned.

Mac gulped. She had him.

“W-Well, ya see,” he stammered.

Why am I now on the defensive?!

“Aha!” Applejack shouted. “You was doin that on purpose!”

Horse apples.

“Well ya definitely weren't tryin to stop me!” Mac returned, taking a step forward.

“And why would I?! I was busy being stimulated!” Applejack stepped forward.

“Ya culd have said somethin!” Another step.

“Maybe I didn't wanna!” Step.

“And why wouldn't ya!” Step.

“Becuase I-” Applejack took another step before realizing her muzzle was brushing against Mac's. She froze.

Mac, too locked up upon the contact.

“Uh, Applejack? Yer, uh, kinda close there...”

Applejack swallowed nervously.

“Ya? What of it?”

Mac laughed awkwardly.

“Well, uh...”

“Yeah...”

“Do...”

“I...”

Applejack looked at Mac's eyes.

Macintosh looked into Applejack's eyes.

Wordlessly, they leaned forward, lips brushing against each other.

Despite how heated they had each become, the kiss was surprisingly tender. It was gentle and slow, as if it were their first.

Applejack was the one to break away. She cocked her head back, giving Macintosh a curious look.

“Did we just-”

Macintosh nodded.

“Eeyup.”

Applejack looked off to the side, confirming with herself that she had indeed kissed her brother. Oddly enough, she was perfectly fine with it. Not that there was much of a chance she would have had a problem.

She looked back at Big Mac.

“Can we... do it again?”

He smiled softly before closing the distance once more, and the two locked lips passionately. This time, Applejack slipped her tongue along Mac's lips, worming her way into his mouth. There, she danced with him, sloppily smacking on eachother.

They were so distracted that they didn't even hear a set of hoof beats around the side of the barn. They were completely oblivious to the word until the shriek.

“B-Big brother?! Big sister?!”

As if a fire had been lit under their butts, Applejack and Big Mac leaped from each other, looking opposite directions.

“What is it, Apple Bloom?” Applejack asked, feigning ignorance on what had just happened.

Apple Bloom sniffled.

“Granny Smith was looking for ya two, but- now my bow is all ruined!”

Confused as to why she hadn't questioned her elder siblings... interaction, the two looked at their baby sister.

She was covered in mud, having fell in the same puddle that Applejack had fallen in to. Her bow indeed had a large splotch on it.

Both of them let out a long sigh of relief.

“I-is that all?” Applejack laughed. “In that case, yer free to use the shower. We'll go find Granny.”

Apple Bloom sniffled again, nodding. The two elder ponies scampered past her, shaking themselves dry. Apple Bloom made her way towards the shower head before pausing, casting a curious look upon her two siblings.

“Wait, why were ya both using the shower at the same time?” she asked suspiciously.

Applejack gulped, opening her mouth to answer, but Macintosh swooped in just in time.

“Saves time. Got to go!”

Grabbing Applejack's hoof, he ran off, leaving Apple Bloom curious but content.

Applejack shot Mac a grateful look.

“Thanks fer the save there, brother.”

Mac stopped before taking the bend around the house. Glancing around, he confirmed that they were alone.

“S'no problem.”

Applejack giggled before leaning forward, kissing him softly.

“But thank ya, nonetheless.”

“My pleasure,” Mac replied.

And thus it began.

Author's Note

Words cannot explain why I wrote this. My humblest- DERP

Chapter 2

*Insert Apple Pun*

Digital_Hex

The sun was warm as it rose into the sky, shedding it's golden light over Sweet Apple Acres. Applejack stirred as a beam cast over her face. She yawned, pushing herself as she groggily blinked, looking around.

Her face flushed pink as her eyes locked on the mass of red hide rising and falling right next to her.

The events from the night before flashed through her mind, a guilty pleasure she couldn't help but giggle at.

Laying back down, she crawled under Mac's hoof, wrapping him around her. The two were in the loft of the barn, a decent hiding spot for their... escapades, the night prior. Further away from the house, so there was a lot less chance of them getting caught in the act.

She smiled as she felt Mac's warmth around her. Closing her eyes, the mare felt herself starting to drift back off.

That was, until-

“Applejack?”

Applejack's eyes went wide. Apple Bloom had apparently come out looking for them, having poked her head inside the barn.

Applejack tried to control her breathing, but that only made it worse as she inhaled the scents that her and Mac had worked up. The barn was stale with the funk of spunk and sweat. It was undeniable.

Apple Bloom took a quick whiff before grimacing, covering her nose with a hoof.

“Ew, what's that smell?” she whispered as she pulled herself inside the barn.

“C'mon Applejack, I know yer in here! I checked all over fer ya, ya gotta be here! Why're ya hiding!”

Applejack swallowed hard. She and Mac weren't exactly shielded from view. If Apple Bloom were to simply look up-

“Ah! There ya... are...”

Apple Bloom had looked up. Of course.

“Uh, sis?” she asked, looking with confusion at her two elder siblings.

“Ya?” Applejack asked rather bluntly, wanting to work through this ordeal... however she could, really. She had no idea how to explain this to her little sister.

“Why's big brother holdin ya like that?”

Applejack cursed under her breath.

“Well ya see-”

She was interrupted by Macintosh snickering in his sleep, mumbling loudly.

“AJ, ya silly pony... yer usin yer teeth too much...”

Applejack flushed. She just hoped Apple Bloom wouldn't catch on to what he meant by-

“That's better, AJ,” Mac chuckled, eyes still closed as he smiled all sorts of goofy. “Ya give amazing head, sis...”

“Tarnations, Mac!” she screamed, bucking Mac hard in the chest. His eyes went wide as he let out a quite audible OOMF!

“What the- Applejack! What was that fer!?”

Applejack's face was red as she pointed at Apple Bloom.

Their baby sister was petrified, looking at the two with a horrified expression. Macintosh sucked in sharply.

“What did I jus say...?”

“Ya just commented on my skills at playin the flute,” she grunted.

Apple Bloom shook violently, tears springing into her eyes.

“What're... Are ya... Why're...” she sputtered, trying to deny what she saw before her own eyes.

“Now hold on, Bloom, we can explain!” Applejack tried to reason, but Apple Bloom would have none of it.

“Explain what, that ya two are screwin off when there's work ta be had!” she screamed.

Macintosh narrowed his eyes.

“Now listen here, this has nothin to do with skippin out on the farm-”

“Nah, brother!” Apple Bloom cried. “Ya'd just rather be foolin 'round in the barn with yer... Ah!”

She turned and sprinted away.

Applejack groaned, flopping onto her back.

“That... went horribly.”

“Eeyup,” Macintosh agreed.

Meanwhile, Apple Bloom skittered out of the barn, racing back towards the house. Granny Smith was out on the porch already, rockin' away in her favourite chair.

“Granny Smith!” Apple Bloom hollered. “Ya need ta hear this!”

Chapter 3

*Insert Apple Pun*

Digital_Hex

Applejack didn't want to admit it to herself, but the fact still stood that they were... well, they were-

“We're busted,” Big Mac said loudly, finishing what was on AJ's mind.

“Looks like it,” she sighed. She let a hoof dangle down from the balcony as she tried to brainstorm a way to explain this to Apple Bloom.

“How're we gon' explain this here to 'er?” Applejack thought aloud. Big Macintosh rolled over so he laid next to her. His sister leaned against his warm coat, relishing his touch.

“Ah don't rightly know,” he admitted.

Applejack sighed, lost in her own mind. So many decisions she now faced, all because her little sister had to walk in at the wrong time.

“Gosh darn it, Bloom, why'd ya have ta jus' walk on in here when ya did?” she mumbled aloud. “Well, the least we can do is pray she don't tell-”

“APPLEJACK! BIG MACINTOSH!” Granny Smith practically bellowed from her rocking chair outside of the Apple family home.

Big Macintosh shot Applejack a look. Applejack blushed before rapping lightly against the wood of the loft.

“Suppose ah should've done that befor' sayin somethin, huh?”

“GET OUT HERE! NOW!” Granny Smith added, loudly.

AJ and Mac groaned as they made their way out of the loft. Their coats were still damp with each others sweat, reminiscent of their play time.

“How much trouble d'ya think we're in fer this?” Macintosh asked his sister. Applejack shrugged.

“No clue.”

Together, the two rounded the corner of the barn, expecting to see their granny riled up and angry. Instead, they found quite the interesting situation.

“Ah, there ya two youngins are!” Granny Smith groaned from where she lay, slung over the railing. Apple Bloom was laying unconscious at the foot of the stairs to the home.

“G-Granny?” Applejack exclaimed as she rushed over to her grandmother, helping her off the railing as Big Mac rushed to Apple Bloom, helping her up into a sitting position. He checked her over only to confirm that she was out cold, but otherwise unhurt.

“What happened?” AJ asked her grandmother.

“Why, that youngin down there told me some int'restin news, and was gon' flap her yap all o'er town too!”

AJ felt her stomach pit.

“What... interestin' news?” she asked.

Granny Smith rolled her eyes at her grand-daughter.

“Now ah know ah'm old, but do you two youngin's honesty think ah couldn't hear what y'all were getting' into in ma barn?” she asked coldly.

The pit in AJ's stomach churned.

“So yer mad?” she asked, motioning towards Apple Bloom. Granny's eyes went wide.

“What- no, no child. Yer sister slipped and fell try'na run up these steps. I tried to get up maself, but tripped as well!”

Applejack nodded, but she was still confused.

“Wait, so... yer not mad?”

Granny laughed. “Of course not, dear, I had a favourite cousin when I was your age too, dear!”

The pit relinquished, only to return when she realized what her Granny's words meant.

“Too much info there, Granny.”

Author's Note

Eh, why not.