Lady Luck meets Lord Chance

Things could be worse.

At least he didn’t have a broken wing; the only thing that really hurt was his pride. What a landing. The impact may have been jarring but he could shrug it off, Rainbow Blitz was sure things were going to be okay.

Yeah right, he just got sucked in head first through a mirror, a mirror! It was amazing he hadn’t been shredded to pieces.  He had panicked when the curtain obstructed his vision, then bashed his muzzle on a few, painfully solid objects before he recovered. The pony grumbled to himself, and then his friends decided to dog pile on him, didn’t they?

The winged pony picked himself up and dusted himself off, muttering obscenities under his breath the entire time. Leave it to Dusk to be a dolt and get himself captured by, by…hmm.

Blitz’s gaze shifted back and forth around the room, and he could only pout in disbelief.

“We’re back in Ponyville?! Are you kidding me?!” He growled in exasperation before finally laying eyes on just the alicorn he wasn’t thrilled to see.

“Dusk Shine! Can you explain what the hay is going on? You said you went to Canterlot, Spines said you were ponynapped! I dived through glass for you, ready to save your sorry flank!” He huffed, crossing his hooves.

That last part wasn’t exactly true, Rainbow Blitz was pulled into the mirror, screaming like a little filly as it happened, but he’d never admit it.

An orange hoof placed itself on his shoulder; it was attached to a large stallion with a concerned expression.

“While I’m impressed by your loyalty to our mission of saving Dusk, your observation skills leave much to be desired.” he drawled. The large orange pony, gestured a hoof around the room.

Raising a brow, the cyan Pegasus finally noticed the six other ponies in the library. Elusive the unicorn was staring at another orange mare, scrutinizing her with his critical eye. He flicked her hat and flipped his tail in distaste. She looked extremely offended when he scoffed and turned from her, on to his next victim. Butterscotch tentively circled a pink earth pony, who was grinning so widely that Rainbow Blitz unconsciously touched his own facial muscles, unsure if they were truly capable of such a feat.

He looked back at his friend, who could only frown and shake his head unknowingly.

“I guess the gang’s all here.” said Dusk Shine quietly.

“Who the heck are you guys and why are you in the library before hours?” asked Rainbow Blitz, tone accusing.

Rainbow Dash was not one to take an accusation, no matter how subtle it was.

“Who are we? Who are you?!”she snapped back, “You guys just trashed the library after you flew out of a mirror! Nice landing by the way.”

Rainbow Blitz’s feathers bristled as he straightened to bicker with the obnoxious cyan mare who had insulted his honour. As he opened his mouth, a well groomed white hoof shoved itself into it, effectively shutting him up.

“Where are our manners?” laughed a rich, baritone voice. It belonged to the white unicorn with a navy blue mane and sparkling sapphire hues.

Those sparkling sapphires however, turned cold and steely as they glared at Rainbow Blitz, with the very distinct message of Be mature and polite about this, you idiot.

“My name is Elusive Beau; this here is the ever dashing Rainbow Blitz.” Blitz grunted. Elusive casted a disdainful look at his friend before continuing, “My good colt Butterscotch is the other Pegasus, and the charming Applejack is truly the delight of our small town.”

Applejack nodded and smiled, “Howdy.” Standing a few trots away was Applejack the mare, staring at the orange Stallion curiously and mildly annoyed for a reason she could not explain.

“I see you’ve already met our resident genius, Dusk Shine. And last but not certainly not least is- Berry Gumball, you get down from there!” scolded Elusive.

The pink stallion had been hanging off the chandelier, playing paddy cake with another just as pink, just as bubbly mare.

“Aw, man.” moaned Berry Gumball and Pinkie Pie in unison as the male hopped back onto the floor.

“Might I ask the names of the lovely ladies, and perhaps give them a tour of the town?” asked the gracious Elusive.

Rainbow Dash smirked, “The name’s Rainbow Dash, and we live here, pal. I don’t know who you think you are,” she paused for a moment, groomed fetlocks, coiffed mane,  polished horseshoes…definitely Rarity, “You should probably take your egghead friend here and head on home.”

“We live here too.” came the soft but firm statement from Butterscotch.

“Well, actually we are in their version of Ponyville.” explained Dusk Shine, “When we went through the mirror, we actually ended up here, in an alternate universe. This isn’t exactly home, though it may feel like it.”

Rainbow Dash wasn’t mollified, “Yep, our property, why don’t you second rate copy cats take a hike?”

“Rainbow!” chided Twilight, “You’re being rude!”

Blitz had just about enough lip from the annoying little mare, “Second rate?! I’m the fastest flier in Equestria! I pull off sonic rainbooms in my sleep!” He spread his wings, “Fly me, brah!”

“Oh, you wanna go? I’ll go!” challenged Rainbow.

“No one wants to go!” interjected both Applejacks, “I suggest ya’ll calm down and keep a level head.”

“Spooky.” noted Berry and Pinkie in unison. Realizing what they had done, the two smiled at each other and high hoofed.

But it was too late, “First one to the bell tower and back wins! Readysetgo!”  shouted Rainbow Dash. And with a gust of wind, the two cyan ponies disappeared in a rainbow flash.

“If one of them wasn’t enough,” sighed Twilight.

“Now we have two brash and competitive ponies.” shrugged Dusk Shine good-naturedly, finishing Twilight’s sentence.

Rainbow Dash was beating her wings as fast as pegasusly possible. Here was this arrogant pony, claiming he was faster than her, when it had already been established time and time again, that were was no better flier than Rainbow A. Dash. The A stood for awesome!  She was the youngest flier in Equestria to do a sonic Rainboom, the top of her class at the Cloudsdale Weather Academy. She even turned the Wonderbolts down before! Did she mention the A stood for awesome? Dash scowled, it didn’t matter if Rainbow Blitz was her alternate, they were still two different ponies, with different wing spans, muscle strength, bony density…she’d still be the best.

Rainbow Blitz was right next to the rainbow mare, gritting his teeth in frustration. Okay, fine, she was fast. Faster than any other mare he had ever flown with. But he was a stallion, he had the muscle advantage, he couldn’t possibly lose! He was the element of loyalty, the champion of kicking flank and looking good while doing it. Lunar Nightterror couldn’t stop him, Strife couldn’t hold him down. Queen Somber and King Nymphamos? Nuh uh, Rainbow Blitz took them all down!

Then why in the name of all that is good and holy can’t I get a nose of an advantage?

The two were flying neck and neck, even at the turn around the clock tower, not a single feather of distance was lost or gained. Each emptied the tank and gave a final burst of speed as they approached the library, but they were going much too fast to adjust for the sudden change in wind current, sending them both tumbling through the open doors of the library. They skidded and slid on the floor, finally sliding to the centre of the main room, where they were scrutinized under agitated and exasperated looks.

“Who…won?” panted Rainbow Blitz.

“You tied.” said Fluttershy as a matter of factly.

“I win!” squealed Pinkie Pie. Berry grumbled as he tossed the mare three bit coins. He never lost bets, until now apparently.

“Aw, come on! Rematch!” Shouted Rainbow Dash.

“Bring it!”

“No.” said Rarity calmly, a hoof on Rainbow’s shoulder, “If you two hotheads would cool down for a bit, we can discuss the real issue here.”

Elusive nodded at his double, “Indeed. There are six paradoxes in this room. You six mares being male is something that never happened in this world, and here we are, standing in the same room!”

Worried, Fluttershy trotted next to Twilight Sparkle, “Is this…bad?” she asked.

“We’re not sure yet.” answered Dusk Shine, looking up from his book, “Reality hasn’t been destroyed yet, that’s for sure. As of now, I’d suggest to just staying away from the mirror, don’t even mention it to anyone else, and I guess you should stick in groups.”

“Like a buddy system.” continued Twilight Sparkle, “Cover for your doubles, and but try to keep the social interaction with others to a minimum, well, unless you think you can handle the awkwardness that’s bound to ensue when you have the male, or female version of yourself hanging around with you.”

Applejack shrugged and waved a beckoning hoof over to her male counterpart, he began to follow, as did two other earth ponies, happily bouncing along.

Rarity eyed Elusive for a few moments and finally stated, “If it wouldn’t be a trouble to you, could I practice making a suit on you? Dresses are my passion of course, but I hardly ever get male clients, I think this would be a wonderful learning experience.”

Elusive grinned, “But of course! Always happy to help a lovely lady.”

The mare blushed and they set off for Carousel Boutique to fit Elusive for his new suit.

As Dusk Shine levitated another pile of books toward him and Twilight for their research on the mirror, Rainbow Blitz and Rainbow Dash stormed out of the library. They glared at each other with animosity.

“You’re nuts if you think you’re staying with me.” growled Rainbow Dash.

“I didn’t want to anyway! I bet my crib’s better!” huffed Blitz.

“Fine then!”

“Good!”

“Okaaay, calm down now.” urged Butterscotch, stepping between the two, “We’re all friends here.”

His female double agreed, “Why don’t we just relax, and get some nice, hot breakfast?”

Rumbles of hunger could be heard from the stomachs’ of the athletes, who had just finished a race without any sustenance.

“I bet I can eat more than you.” challenged Blitz.

“We’ll see about that!” retorted the cyan mare.

As the two rushed off toward the nearest diner, Fluttershy rolled her eyes, “What in Equestria am I going to do with her?”

Butterscotch gave her a good hearted smile, “Well, as soon as you figure that out, feel free to tell me so I can keep Blitz in check. Come on, I’m sure we’re going to have to play mediator with those two.” His eyes widened in sudden realization, “Oh, Solaris, we have to make sure they don’t eat the town out of business.” he remarked playfully.

The mare laughed softly, but genuinely, “We better hoof it then!”

It was a Celestia damned war zone. A Nightmare Moon cursed scenario. A Discord blessed turn of events.  It was what would be forever mentioned as the Great Panic of the Breakfast Foods at old J.J’s Diner.

Determined sets of Amethyst eyes stared each other down as the ponies they belonged to shovelled food into their mouths. Mountains of plates were stacked on top of one another, the poor chefs were tripping over their hooves to bring orders to table 12, where Rainbow Dash and Rainbow Blitz were locked in an epic showdown of the highest stake; their prides. Eggs, toast, pancakes, waffles, cheese, omelettes, every breakfast food one could imagine were being devoured quickly and methodically. This had been the first hour, as for the second and somehow, a prolonged third, the devouring devolved into a forced nibbling and pained chewing.

Breathe and swallow, breathe and swallow. Thought Blitz determinedly, although with the over looming feeling of doubt, and stomach cramps.

I…I can’t.

Rainbow Blitz paused, and the mare he was facing off looked up from her toast. He raised a single hoof in the air, and took a deep breath. He smacked his lips once. Then twice. The stallion promptly threw up all over the floor.  He finally collapsed on the table, a strand of drool dripping from his mouth. Old J.J the beige earth pony tugged at his goatee and paid one of his waiter’s two bits. After pocketing the money, he sent him to fetch a mop to clean up the mess Blitz had made; it was a victory short lived.

Dash however, couldn’t celebrate. Usually a bright cyan, the mare was currently an odd shade of sea green. With a sudden sprint, she flew into the washroom and slammed the door. One could only imagine the horrors beyond.

The butter coloured Pegasus stared at the stallion beside her and covered her face with a wing, “Why didn’t we stop them?” she groaned.

A low growl escaped Butterscotch’s lips, “We tried.” he muttered, still picking at the harden egg whites stuck in his mane from his first three attempts at slowing the cyan ponies down. They wasted perfectly good eggs, throwing them at poor Butterscotch.

Rainbow Dash merged from the filly’s room, stumbling and looking no better than she had been when she entered, although her coat was less green, more of a pale blue.

“Are you two completely satisfied with yourselves?!” demanded Butterscotch, uncharacteristically authoritative.

“What good came from this foalish competition? Nothing! You both tied, again. You both wasted piles of perfectly good food, and you’ve completely embarrassed Fluttershy and I. Now your bodies will have to pay for your recklessness here.” He stormed out of the dinner and sat by the road, fuming.

Blitz got up with a groan and followed after his friend, “Alright, fine. I’m sorry for this little…mishap here.” He put a hoof around the agitated yellow pony, “Sorry to you, Scotch, not her.” finished Rainbow Blitz pointedly.

It was Fluttershy’s turn to be exasperated, “You are her!” she sighed while helping Rainbow Dash out of the diner.

“You two are going to destroy Ponyville with your antics.” said Scotch quietly.

“Doesn’t seem as if you two are as close as me and Shy.” came the snarky ribbing from Rainbow Dash.

“Enough, Rainbow.” said Fluttershy, almost appalled at her friend’s audacity, “Butterscotch is right. You if you two don’t get along, somepony, including yourselves, are going to get hurt.”

Feelings of remorse and regret flowed through the cyan ponies. Rainbow Blitz and Dash begrudgingly exchanged a look; it was a simple glance, followed by a nod.

“We’re stubborn and thick skulled, fine.” said Dash, “But you animal caretakers, you.” continued Blitz, “You’re our friends, and, I guess we care. About you.” he groaned, “Sharing feelings is for fillies!”

But that was enough for the gentle, yellow ponies. Butterscotch and Fluttershy shared a smile.

“I know Twilight and Dusk Shine said to use the buddy system with our doubles, but since you two don’t seem to get along, maybe we should swap partners?” suggested Fluttershy.

“I can go with Rainbow Dash, and Blitz can go with Fluttershy.” nodded the yellow stallion.

Rainbow Blitz slowly walked up to the yellow mare, he wasn’t particularly large, just your average Pegasus stallion, but he was still a good hand taller than her.

“Whatever, let’s go.”

He readied his wings for take-off, but instantly back-pedalled at the sight of Rainbow Dash in his face.

“In the name of Luna, if you do anything stupid or reckless with Fluttershy, and if I know myself, I would, I’ll buck you to next Tuesday! And, and…and then next Tuesday Applejack will buck you back and we’ll just buck you back and forth like a ping pong ball! Ohh, you’ll be so sorry…” she said threateningly, voice trailing off for Blitz’s imagination to add its own flavour of horror.

“Yeah, well, you treat Scotch well! He’s sensitive!” retorted Blitz.

Butterscotch dead-panned, “There’s a difference between reserved and sensitive, you dolt.”

But Blitz was already in the air, “Treat my boy right! Peace late!” he thumped his chest twice with his hoof before flying off, Fluttershy in tow.

To his left, Rainbow Dash had a mischievous grin on her face. A grin Butterscotch didn't like, not a single bit.