//-------------------------------------------------------// Macedonian Sun -by GewherKills- //-------------------------------------------------------// //-------------------------------------------------------// Prologue: From Every Nation //-------------------------------------------------------// Prologue: From Every Nation Well this sucks. It was what Richard had kept in mind since he had got here. It abhorred to have been thrown into a country that didn’t exist, it was even worse to have been thrown into a cage by poachers, and it sucked brass balls to discover that he had a primary role as a sexual-slave.                     He had been on this train for a few days now, forced to wallow in his own excrement usually, with his captors cleaning the cage and allowing him a chance to stretch his aching limbs barely, if ever. Humans all around him acted aberrantly, making animalistic noises, flinging their excrement about, and trying to bite their captors. The terrain gave the impression of a Germanic countryside. The terrain was quite familiar to him, because he was an exchange student at the Freie Universität Berlin. His brain, desperate to form some recognition of where he was in his state of denial, kept insisting he was out, heavily intoxicated, somewhere in the Leipzig countryside.                     He had considered reaching for something to saw off the bars of the cage, but the idea proved useless. His owners had tied his leash right into the goddamn wall. How?            With magic, of course! It was always the explanation. How did his leash fit into the wall? Because magic. How did the ponies control them with total obedience, even when branding or castrating them? Magic of course!             The thoughts of castration and branding gave a shivering sensation down his spine. Most of the time, castration was performed with something as simple as a pair of garden shears! His captors couldn't afford proper equipment, and even then, they were not concerned.                   Then there was the ahem- ‘Indulgement’. Those bastards would come back into his car and have their way with the females. It terrified him to watch, and then of course there was the odd homosexual joining in the fun.  Nowthere was something to see. After ceasing with their carnal pleasures, they would lead the raped ones into a different car, to make sure they weren't sold along with the others.                     They had been stopping at town after town, with humans being sold off by the hundreds, but they insisted on keeping him until they reach a destination they all seemed excited about reaching. Someplace called Canterlot, if he remembered correctly. He had noticed all of the puns of American towns this country had. Baltimare, Fillydelphia, Las Pegasus.             Sabel was one of about fifty left on the train. He mostly could tell why they were saving them. Some were well muscled, others showed remarkable intelligence in pony eyes. To Rex though, their ‘remarkable intelligence’ was nothing beyond the capacity of a talented dog, or perhaps an internet phenomenon like that Keyboard Cat video.                     He couldn't understand though, why he was here.                     He was pretty much your average student, 5’11, gamer, whiter than a cheesecake, and a bit of additional intelligence kept in check by absolutely no sense of maturity. His captors always kept bragging amongst themselves that he would fetch at least 10,000 bits at market. Oh the irony.. His train of thought was interrupted as the train gave a sharp jerk, smashing him into the side of his cage. He looked out into the city below, ignoring the humans below being sent out in chains to meet their fate, it was actually quite catching to the eye. A colossal yet welcoming fortress graced the city with quite an awe-inspiring presence, the mark of a blazing sun bestowing one entrance, the other bearing a crescent moon. So this in Canterlot… ‘’Finally, we’re here!’’ ‘’Everypony, get those humans out, and get them quick, we’re dealing with nobility here, so put your damn flanks into it!’’ the most senior of his captors quickly announced. ‘’The boss sees any slacking, and it’ll be the end of you!’’ Richard was taken first; he offered no resistance, knowing it was futile.                     His eyes were blinded as he stepped out onto a podium, neck chained and linked to the twenty other humans lined up on the platform as a voice sprang to life on the loudspeaker. ‘’Noble mares and gentlecolts of Equestria, I give to you, with great honor, the finest humans of our storage!’’ ‘’The bidding shall start at 1,000 bits, now for our first offer!’’ A fine male, five feet and nine inches in height, dark skin, and remarkably muscular for any ‘recreation’ that may be had!’’ Richard’s expression soured at the mention of the euphemism. Hooves went up all over the crowd, first 2,000 bits, than 3,500, eventually settling on eight thousand, being sold to a blue stallion clad in a gray breastplate.                     Humans sold for crazily expensive prices, ten thousand, and twenty thousand one even going as far as forty. It was obviouson the trader’s faces that they had never expected this kind of profit.                     ‘’And now for our final, and greatest offer!’’ A rare breed of Human male, five feet and eleven inches in height, and incredibly gifted in the fields of physical fitness, endurance, and ability, for all those who would seek to have such fun.’’ Well fuck me sideways with a flaming lubricated horsec*ck. Thought Richard with a defeated frown on his face. Oh wait.. ‘’Fifty thousand bits!’’ one cried. ‘’Seventy thousand!’’ ‘’Eighty-five thousand!’’ The offers kept going higher and higher by the thousands, Richard could have sworn he saw the boss start to salivate one it reached three hundred-thousand. ‘’One million bits!’’ The entire field fell silent. ‘’One m-m-million bits?!’’ The Boss stuttered as one of the nobles came forward. ’Yes! My good sir! No joke at all!’’  ‘’One million bits for this fine specimen! No funny business!’’ I'm not liking where this is going.. ‘’Of course Prince! SOLD to Prince Blueblood for one million bits!’’ How impressive. Richard thought, He’s got a jerk-off name to match the jerk-off outfit.. The stallion had a styled mane, bowtie, and a white tuxedo equipped with a red tulip in the breast pocket.  From the looks of it, he’d been taking that suit everywhere. He gave a contagious smile that would have made anybody back home roll their eyes in disgust as the Prince went to collect the human and whatever else he needed. His suspicions were not for the feint of heart. His new owner had been leading him down the castle’s many confusing and intricately decorated corridors, looking intently for one particular room that Sabel prayed to God was the servant’s quarters. He’d take unpaid labor over being buggered up the arse by Blondie here.         ‘’Come along, my pet.’’ Blueblood chimed as he lead Rex down another hallway, ‘’We’re going to be having fun all night and day!’’ If any Siddha, are present, please let someone get me out of here, please! Thought Rex as he was lead down the secluded hallway, nowhere near any servant’s quarters.         Blueblood levitated a key from his saddlebag, and slid it into the lock. Opening the door to the room full of.. Oh my god.. Saddles, chew toys, dildos, whips, lube, and a goddamn upright steel rack with straps attached to it. NoNoNONoNONONo! Thought Richard as the Prince started lubing up his nether regions. God, Discord, Billy Mays, something get me out of here! Rex thought, looking around for a means of escape. ‘’Alright you little rascal, bend over!’’ His eyes closed forcefully as he waited for the end to arrive. There was no way out of this, he was in for a whole new world of pai-                 ‘’Blueblood?’’ //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 1- Die Schöne Sonne, Mein Retter //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 1- Die Schöne Sonne, Mein Retter ‘’Blueblood?’’         Both my to-be rapist and myself looked up to gaze in the presence of an imposing, yet motherly figure standing in the door, with a look akin to someone walking in on.. Well, a rape.         For a few moments, the three of us just stood in silence, the white mare looking like she had seen a ghost, my would-be tormentor looking looking, and probably knowing, that his life was about to get a whole lot harder, and me, wondering how my asshole wasn’t bleeding horrifically yet.         ‘’Blueblood’’ The regal mare said, this time dropping the word in venom, ‘’What-is-this?’’ That’s right you stingy bastard, prepare, for a world of pain. I thought gleefully as the mare approached the Prince, now armed with a look of loathing.         ‘’Oh! umm..Auntie!’’, ‘’We’re in a bit of a, private, moment right now, come back later?’’ The royal pressed her face up against the Prince, burning all the anger and flame she could muster into the far reaches of his soul. ‘’I trusted you, NOW I have no choice but to take that trust back, along with the resources gained with it.’’ She seethed. Never letting up on the emotional kerosene being poured into my tormentor’s eyes. ‘’B-but-but Auntie!’’ You wouldn't!’’         ‘’I can and I Will’’ ‘’Blueblood, I find you guilty of repeated Human abuse of the first degree, and for these crimes, I revoke your rank, demesne, and fifty-thousand bits of your fortune’’ The Prince no longer spoke, only stuttering. ‘’B-b-b-but!- ‘’My quarters, now’’  The now former Prince wasted no time in galloping off to the room as fast as his lubricated hooves could carry him, slipping often along the way. I still stood in my original position, petrified by the omnipresent fear of physical abuse that had always been close since my arrival in this forsaken place.  ‘’You need not be afraid, little one, for you are safe now.” I look up at the sun, and see not just a savior, but a beauty unequaled by anything I had witnessed back on Earth before. A motherly gaze,a welcoming smile, and a flowing multi colored mane nearly a foot in length all complimented a powerful, yet caring figure gazing down upon me with a look changed in seconds from complete hatred to loving compassion. Wait, what?!         They’ve kept me In a cage for weeks now, branded men, raped women, sold us to crowds that literally spit as we passed by, and now I’m attracted to one of them?!         My mind is torn over what feelings I may have for the imposing figure, but both acknowledge that she saved me from a fate worse than death, which could have ended in a shattered mind and an equally shattered ass. For that, she deserves my respect.         ‘’T-t-take that.. that human away!’’ ‘’A-and that awful t-thing too!’’ The prince managed to stutter through sobs. I felt no sympathy for my captor, and if I must die now, at least I’ll die happy, knowing that I delivered my revenge. As the guards carry him away, The Princess leads me the other way, with the profanities of the Prince never ceasing to echo down the hall. This time, though, I show nor feel no fear. I know that this time, I’ll finally be able to rest in relative peace after weeks of imprisonment and scarring, mental and physical.         We eventually arrived at a fairly modest-looking door emblazoned with a small Verginia Sun. The Princess slid a small lock mechanism barring the door,and we walked in, to which I    promptly collapsed.  I hadn’t relaxed in days, and that combined with being bought, sold,near-raped, and yet saved all in the same day was too much to bear.         The Sun Princess noticed my constant bouts of shaking, and made an attempt to comfort me. She picked me up gently, using her magic, and glided me over to a pony couch that look more like a rug hybrid, and then promptly started to cry, burying her muzzle into my chest, and letting loose her tears.         It pained me to see such a kind-hearted being cry, especially when I had most of the equity in causing the event to begin with. I wanted to comfort her with whatever words I could find, but I knew that if I revealed my ability to speak by any means, it would be the end of me.         ‘’I never meant to hurt him, I never did.’’         The Princess started to calm down, finally slowing down the shedding of tears that saddened me to see. We lay there for what seemed like hours before she finally got up, depositing me on a canvas bunk near the door.  It took hard effort not to at least grin, or spontaneously hug the pony who had not just saved my life, but given me all the necessities I could ever need, so I did. She seemed surprised by this at first, but she warmed up to the gesture, and even smiled. What she said next finally assured me that there was at least one pony in this world who I could trust.         ‘’Don't worry now my little human. You're safe from the bad ponies’’’ She laid right by my side until I finally curled up and slowed my breathing, a technique I learned in ROTC a few months ago to give the enemy the impression you were asleep. As I was about to lapse into quite a long period of unconsciousness, I briefly see her finally walk out before I finally delve into the world of sleep. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 2: Amidst Barbarians, Never Alone //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 2: Amidst Barbarians, Never Alone Uuughh… How much did I drink last night….         The words themselves seemed to drunkenly stupor through my mind, I hadn’t opened my eyes yet, but I already knew that the following, due to the crazy Equestrian-style dreams I had been having, had to be true:         1.Thou hast consumed enough alcohol to kill most of thine creatures smaller than thou.         2. Thou shalt seek out thy locale psychiatrist.         3.Thou shalt seek out thine toilette even sooner.         Upon the last thought, I immediately jumped up with a speed that would resemble Usain Bolt with an overactive bladder, and attempt to run out of my dorm and into a bathroom as quickly as possible. Except, when I run to my pseudo-door, I instead flatten face first into a fresh section of drywall.         Then, in multiple ways, it hits me. I'm still here.. Every day, the same routine: wake up, look around, make up some assnine attempt to escape. Im in her care now though, so I’m finally safe, right? My feelings for the Sun Goddess, though all too recent to make assumptions, have been in heated conflict for the past forty-eight hours.         My cynical side scoffing and declaring she’s just another rapist, and my ever-weakened sense of hope retaliating with what little it had. She seemed nice enough, but in this world, cynicism is what’s kept me alive so far, and I intend to stick to it.         I peeled myself off the wall, and looked around the room for whatever sharp, pointy objects I could find. If I needed to, in a tight spot I could probably beat something to death with any of a variety from objects from a broken glass shard to a steel dildo. Unfortunately, I could find neither, as the room had been wiped clean of anything even close to pointy. Sighing, I slumped back into my cot in resignation. There was nothing I could use, nowhere to run, and no-one coming to save my sorry arse.         And soon enough, my newfound captor-savior walked in with a smile, holding a leash. I groaned, but grudgingly lifted myself off the cot and lied down in a gesture of submission to let her attach the leash. After all, why the hell not? If I’m already an animal, act the part. She seemed surprised I didn’t stand up at first, but attached the leash anyways.         Apparently all of us still walked naturally rightside up. I had thought with our animalistic nature it had to be trained into us. I slowly rose up and started walking, I had no other option. She seemed to brighten up the walls with just a smile. Eventually we passed by one of the nobles on our walk, I could almost identify them by smell now. The overpriced and overwhelming stench of  perfume could be smelled and gagged at from two miles away. The sun being the relative chatterbox she is, they couldn't help but strike up a conversation.         ‘’Ah, Princess! I can’t help but notice what a fine specimen you have there, I must say!’’         Yes, Family Tree? The Princess's brow rose and began to furrow. ‘’I would offer you quite the sum for this fine human!’’         ‘’He’s NOT for rent, Tree.’’         ‘’Oh but Princess, he would be such a fine human to go to waste! Why he must be of one of the highest pedigrees in the Kingdom, may I just have the pleasure of renting him?’’ I wanted to kick this guy in the balls so badly..         ‘’I said HE’S NOT FOR RENT!         Upon hearing the Princess's thundering announcement, the Noble quickly shut up. Word apparently spreads fast in this country, as we went the rest of the day without much interference. Eventually we came to a pet store in one of the more busy streets. Everything seemed to be strutted with various diamonds or other jewels.  The city’s streets showed no sign of crime, misery, disease or even a simple speck of dirt. You would have sworn the had taken Brave New World and ponified the story. The nearby ponies, noble or not, all bowed before her.         Every time, She simply laughed and said that they had no need to bow. The store we eventually reached had enough bling attached to the bloody walls that it may have been the cause of permanent blindness for an unfortunate few of the locals. And if the outside wasn’t enough, the inside probably could induce nausea from excessive pastel alone.         The Sun Goddess ignoring my futile attempts to preserve my vision, walked into the the store, only to be told that she couldn't drag my sorry arse in here, as it was a violation of company policy. Reluctantly, she hitched me to a post outside, (also diamond-strutted) and left me to wait.         Boredom set in fairly quick, and I was left to look repetitively at the city’s other highest stores, all boasting the same show-off attitude and heavily inflated pricing. Eventually though,something looking vaguely reminiscent of a Dishonored-style aristocrat at a costume party caught me eye.         This guy belonged to someone incredibly wealthy or equally odd.         He was clad in a long coat donned with various feathers jutting out around his wrists, shoulders and elbows. Most of the outfit was checkered in various shades of purple and red, his hands covered with latex- looking gloves.         The man himself gave off an aroma of cold venom, his blue eyes piercing into anything the gazed, as if analyzing what to take down in a fight, or perhaps searching for a target, and soon enough, the spotted me.         I instinctively grabbed the sharpest rock I could find lying around, and arranged myself in as much as a combat stance as I could bear. He glanced over to me, spotting the rock in my hand, he sighed, and rolled his eyes. His demeanor confused me immensely. First it seemed like he wanted to murder someone, now he just looked annoyed. He walked over to me, then sat down at the post next to me a way probably intentionally designed to resemble somewhat of a dog. He slowly leaned over, not to arouse suspicion, and whispered the first six words I had received out of a human’s lips I had heard since my arrival. ‘’Can you understand what I’m saying.’’         I remain silent for a few seconds, then as he sighs and begins to walk, I respond.         ‘’Nope, it’s just Chuck Testa.’’         He looks to me, initially with a stunned expression and barrages me with questions. I don’t blame him, as he’s probably been as isolated as me ever since his departure from Terra firma. He introduces himself as Josh, and says he’s part of a Thieves Guild based here, with various sects in other cities.         While I’m glad to have met another, I’m reluctant to give him my actual name, so I instead give him a pseudonym, John. He cocks an eye at the name, but accepts it. Eventually he gets up, and before we part ways, agrees to meet again. Before I can speak again, a griffon walks up, detaches his leash, and he’s off.         I watch as he leaves, a smile growing ever larger on my face as I finally know I am no longer alone. I ponder whether I will ever meet him again, and if so, If I may finally make my escape. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 4: Sub Insciens Concussio //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 4: Sub Insciens Concussio Canterlot Castle Anno Domini 2014 September,6:30 A.M I was tired of this shit.         I had playing the “surprisingly intelligent beast” game for weeks now, and I was tired of it. the weeks of ‘entertaining the nobility as well as Celestia had taken a toll on me, and I most likely would have lost it by now if not for that certain encounter a few weeks ago. As that human walked off in the day to do god-knows-what at night, he actually undid a far bit of psychological scarring. Speaking of nights, after meeting ‘Josh’ a few weeks ago, I had hypothesised that there had to be more people like him. There had to be, meeting him was proof enough. But, in order to gain an “outlet”, if you will, to the outside word; I needed a pony intermediary to relay me information and send information from myself. So began my purposely slow and tentative process of revealing my intelligence.         It turns out that I didn’t have to work very hard to find such a pony. One of my caretakers, Swift Protector, had been noticing my strange bouts of “Near-Sentience” that I accidentally let slip from time to time. I had approached him about a week ago, while no-one (or rather no-pony, as it were) was around, I crept up. Out of more bravado than brains, I quietly whispered four words into his ear that could change the course of this city’s, and nation’s histories. “Can you help me?” Then I realized the sheer stupidity of what I had done. Would he call the guard? Would he pretend to trust me and sell me out? Or worse, what if I was taken to the Royal Laboratories for ‘testing’? I had had my legs turned and I was ready to run like a bat out of hell at any given moment. Thank god I never needed to. As it turned out, Swift never once became even slightly close to being a sellout. From the minute I first spoke to him, he acted like a kid in a candy store, wanting to know ever more about myself, where I was from, human cultures, and the interesting question of just how the hell I got here; which I happily regurgitated the answers to. I finally could talk to someone other than myself for a change.         Which brings us to the present. Thanks to Swift’s having access to the local libraries, I’m able to have at least some Pony-made books; the one I’ve been nearly addicted to being Battered Spear’s new novel Capitulation, which I found to be eerily similar to Robert Conroy’s 1945, with both Celestia and Emperor Hirohito enduring a similar predicament forced upon them by similar groups of coup-perpetrators.         As well as books on Equestrian history, which basically seemed to be what America would have developed like as an Absolute Monarchy.The very idea of which is ironic itself. The events were almost identical in some areas. The naming of their cities, the way the pushed westward further expanding their frontiers; the similarity was almost scary in a certain way. Swift had noticed it as well.         Swift had also been making a Herculean effort to find and locate my aforementioned human guild member, who always managed to evade the public eye and well-known, reputable locations; which made finding him the ‘easy’ way nearly impossible.Then again, I shouldn't be surprised he would avoid such places. But we were both determined to do so, laws be damned.         We were currently engaged playing a game of Poker. Swift though the idea of gambling in such a form was needless and rather stupid, so we bet favors in the place of material wealth. Which never ceased to make things interesting, especially when the bet was bat-crap insane.  But of course we always did them anyways, but the one I had right now was incredibly risky. As he would find out.  “Swift, I got a rather large one that might jump the shark a little” I stated, not looking up from my cards, a 4 Of Hearts and Jack of Diamonds. Swift had learned only a few human idioms from me so far, but he understood the basic premise of what I meant. “Hit me with it, brother” he replied, not looking up from his own cards himself.         I actually might have cracked a wide smile then and there. Not only did Swift learn Human customs and bits of language exceptionally fast, but he had quite a decent poker face. “I think I might need your assistance in making contact with a few more” I replied as I made yet another bluff-induced call in the hope of convincing him my cards weren't as crappy as I knew them to be.         Swift dropped his cards, a One and a Seven of different pairs. The cheeky bastard was bluffing too, I thought before Swift’s immediate rebuttal. “Are you insane?” He hissed, “You got lucky with me, I wouldn't be the same about the rest of the guard!” I knew his point all too well, but I could not and would not be cooped up in a small room as a pet for the rest of my life. “I know that full well, Swift, but I wasn't planning on meeting with any guards,” I countered; waiting for him to realize my intent.         “Oh, I get it, those blasted court bureaucrats,” he slowly smiled back. “Precisely,” I too grinned, “so I’m counting on you to at least try this just once.” I almost near-pleaded. Swift playfully cocked an eyebrow and replied wittingly “You never won the game, but I’ll do it anyways, I’m so nice like that.” ‘But only after another game.”         I let loose my first hearty laugh since captivity. ______________________________________________________________________________ Canterlot Castle Anno Domini 2014 September 11:30 A.M Celestia groaned for at least the 25th time that day.         She knew It was useless doing so at this point, it was an everyday routine that she had kept up for nearly a millenium; but she still had the tendency. More and more Nobles came with more and more outrageous requests. Money, appointed and elected offices alike, one even requested a statue of him in the Canterlot Gardens for his ‘Valuable Contributions.’ Which, She thought, mostly include sitting on his plot, and making requests for those around him to kiss and wipe it. She had been wanting to whip up a wonderful cake, but there was no time. Plus, she had drank two glasses of Chimay this morning. As a great mare once said while in such a situation “You should not drink.. and bake.” Which she had just exactly done a number of times, neither of them ending in anything resembling a success. She still remembered (and winced) at the time when Luna had drank a full case of Pintrot Noir and attempted to fix dinner for everyone.         The end results had been 12,000 bits worth of damage to the Royal Kitchens, which had never truly healed since that unfortunate accident. It had inspired Celestia to pass a law stating that no-pony who is currently intoxicated should be allowed to handle a massive amount of sulphur, which had been almost unanimously passed by anyone who had heard or seen the blast, which was almost everyone. But she smiled at one thing. At least her pet was always there.         The pet human she had bought from the train, along with the strange toys he had been carrying with him, was stowed away in her Servant’s Quarters. He always managed to give her comfort at the end of the day, no matter the level of stress. Which I could use right now, she thought before returning to one of the many princess-like things princesses usually did on a day-to day basis.         Princess-sized mounds of paperwork.         The sheer workload to be completed in a day would have overwhelmed even the most talented of administrators, but Celestia had possessed experience with the skill for more than nine-hundred and fifty years now, 973 to be exact,  and developed as well as sharpened those skills over time. To her, this was simply an average day’s work. Ponies often scoffed when they saw it, believing that no pony, deity or otherwise, could handle to such a thing. And Celestia scoffed in response, always piling on even more papers to the piles the next day after the press published such a report.         Then again, it was lucky they could, the Equestrian Newspapers and Media Front (ENMF) was a state-run governmental organization, with bureaucrats often ‘softening’ the more radical articles. Celestia disliked the practice, and Luna openly opposed it, always attempting to introduce new legislation to end the State Control of the media. These bills, even if Celestia intervened on her sister’s behalf, always mysteriously ‘disappeared’ after the shortest amount of time in the Kingdom's Diet.         Most of the country’s heavy industry was state owned, a practice which sometimes often grew into an even bigger problem than the ownership of the public media. Cloudsdale and Baltimare were the only notable exceptions. Even they didn’t have much to offer, which had been most of the reason why the government had cut them some slack in the first place; there simply wasn’t enough to impact much of anything. But she had plans to spark a renaissance of the industry there,  and without state intervention. But that could come later. So she had decided to to take the day off today with Luna’s approval, and decided to take the day off today, preferring instead to visit her human. She felt rejuvenated as she climbed the cobblestone maze of hallways, towers and staircases up to the Servant’s Quarters. The air may have been dusty and a bit hazy, but she was happy nonetheless.         The Old Stones actually provided a relaxing atmosphere, which she always had loved to slowly take in. She thought of the Human for a while. While a pet, he had some of the most strange mannerisms she had ever before encountered. For instance, he always slept on a bed. It didn’t matter whether it was a cot or simply a mattress on the floor, he would take it before he would even dream of simply collapsing on the nearby rug. Of course, there were other things such as the human being seemingly a bit autistic, but the psychologist she had summoned had already determined it would be impossible for a human to have a variation of autism found in intelligent creatures, which she found doubly strange. She had thanked her for her findings, but privately doubted their legitimacy. She took her thoughts off the Human and back to navigation. As Old as she was, the castle was much,much older. Even princesses got lost on rare occasion. She could see her Servant’s Quarters just near the end of the hall.  As she began to approach the Quarter’s however, she heard a conversation between her trusted staff aide Swift Protector. Normally, it would be nothing out of the ordinary, just giving her human some love and encouragement, but this time-         -He was mentioning bureaucrats.         Infuriated that one of her closest, most trustable aides would turn on and scheme against her, she quite literally burst through the frail antique lock on the doors, and charged in; ready to arrest the schemers. Normally she tried to tolerate such ponies, no matter how backstabbing and deceitful their actions were, but this time she could make an exception. However, the scheming coming from within the room was laughable, if scheming at all.         The ‘Schemers’ were Swift and the human playing a simple game of-         Wait a minute.         Swift and the HUMAN?! Her jaw slowly dropped open, and she slowly turned towards the human in more awe than rage.The Human had done some strange things before, but this was off the deep end! She didn’t know what to expect, neither from Swift nor her seemingly normal pet, until she heard her human speak some of the first words (and profanity) of his species.         “Oh shit…”         To which she promptly passed out. //-------------------------------------------------------// Author's Note 1 //-------------------------------------------------------// Author's Note 1 ATTENTION ALL (FEMALE DOGS): I'm looking for FimFiction writers who have talent, a knowledge of the military histories AND *drumroll* Those who live in EST time zone and have some way to IM. Sincerely,