My Little Discord: Chaos is Lovely

by 70monkies3eatchowder6

Chapter 4: Trauma with a Side of Guilt

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The cave is dank with a stank that can only be described as rank. Twilight gulps multiple times, trying not to allow herself to get sick. Periodically Fireheart had been teleporting them whenever he had recovered enough from his magic to move more quickly. They move quickly through the underground cave but are still miles from Canterlot.Twilight tries to study him when he casts it, but without seeing the subtle gleams of light from his masked horn, it is difficult to see how he does it. She longs for her books to break the monotony and thick suffocating air.

"Why does the air smell so awful?" she says. "It's like breathing in moist garbage."

Initially, Fireheart says nothing, warps again, and then decides it is time for a rest. He stops and ponders for a moment, but decides to continue. "Far back in Equestrian history, a lot of awful things happened down here. One would think the smell would go away by now, but it never does. The cave has a way of retaining things. There is a secret tunnel in this cave that connects directly to Canterlot, more accurately, Celestia."

"What?" Twilight stomps her hoof down. "How do I not know about that?"

"You know many things, Twilight, but you know far from everything."

She huffs. "I don't expect to know everything. It's just that, I'm her student. She shares everything with me. How could she not trust me to know this?"

Fireheart's mane droops over his eyes. He throws his head back to banish away the hair. "Hey, I was her student too. Keep that in mind. Celestia cares, but she's overprotective. She probably didn't want you to know about how brutal this place was, and...I don't blame her."

"Yeah, but she told you about it."

"Actually, she didn't. At least, not until she had to."

Twilight's face contorts. She turns her head a little to the side. "What do you mean, had to?"

Fireheart pauses for a moment and looks away, sighs. "I don't wish to talk about that right now Twilight."

Twilight feels fury building in her hooves. "Oh you're going to talk alright, Mr. Secretive. I..." She stops herself. "It's because of what happened in the story isn't it? I'm sorry."

"It's fine...We need to keep moving."

"Yeah, about that. This is clearly draining you. Why don't you let me do some of the teleporting?"

"Can you teleport long distance?"

"Well, no...but,"

"Can you see where you're going to end up?"

"Again no. Here's what-"

"Then how's it going to work?"

"Well, maybe if you stop interrupting me, you'll find out!" Twilight finds herself raising her voice a little too much. It echoes through the cave, to the point where the most distant of her echoes almost sounds like a cackle. "Look. All I'm suggesting is that you use your spell to show me where I'm going, and I can do the teleporting for a while. It may be a shorter distance, but It's worth a try."

Fireheart stops and thinks for a moment. "Hmm. That's actually a pretty good idea. The viewing spell doesn't drain me very much. This could work. I'm going to rest a moment longer, and then we'll continue."

"Just hurry before we see more of those things."

"Don't have to worry about that. They don't live in this part of the cave."

"How do you know that?"

"Let's just say I've spent too much of my time here already. I know these caves like the back of my hooves. Nothin' lives 'round this part of the cave."

"Oh?" Twilight cocks her head. "Why is that?"

"I don't know. Best as I can tell, it's like the local wildlife can just sense that something bad happened down here. If you haven't noticed, this part of the cave is silent too."

Twilight's eyes widen at the mention of the fact. Up until this point, she was surrounded by an ambient background of typical cave noises, water dripping, hollow sounds, even the occasional bat screech, but here, there was nothing. No sound whatsoever. Twilight gulps with uncertainty.

"Even after all these years," Firehoof continues, "I gotta admit I've never gotten quite used to this part of the cave."

Now Twilight ponders, resting her hoof to her chin. "You know, you're a pretty somber Stallion, you know that, Fireheart?"

The Stallion snorts. "Heh. Yeah. I s'pose I am."

The two continue onwards, taking turns teleporting, and as they near Canterlot, the silence inexplicably seems to grow. Twilight teleports and finds herself mere feet away from the remains of a long deceased pony. She gasps.

"Careful." Fireheart shoots out a hoof. "You don't want to touch that."

Twilight jerks her head back. "Why would I want to touch it?"

"Boredom? I don't know. The important thing is to not touch it."

"You touched it before, didn't you?"

"...Yes...Don't touch it."

"Heheh...okay. Noted."

Twilight walks a few steps forward, then stops again. "Why?"

Fireheart pauses too. "What?"

"Why don't I want to touch it?"

"You just don't, okay? Look. It's better that you just forget about it and move on."

"You touched it. You seem fine."

"I'm immortal."

"Well so am I...I think."

"Wait, what?"

"Well yeah. I'm an alicorn now, so I'm pretty sure that makes me immortal."

"Well there's another name I suppose I have to remember."

"WHAT did you say?"

"Look, when you're immortal, ponies live and die before your eyes in the blink of an eye. It's impossible to keep track of names, let alone anything else that distinguishes them."

"Celestia does it. She remembers you. She remembers more of the ponies in Ponyville than I do. That's an excuse."

"She does it because that's her job as Princess of the Sun and ruler of Equestria, and even she forgets sometimes, or gets names jumbled." Fireheart takes a few steps closer to Twilight. "She's even done it with me before when I was a little colt. She called me Starswirl before." He looks her in the eyes. "She's never done it to you?"

Twilight rolls her eyes back. "Uh...nope. Never before." She doesn't want to admit it to him, but Fireheart is right. Even Celestia shows a little absent-mindedness when it comes to her own students' names. There were multiple times she had referred to Twilight as Sunset Shimmer, but of course their names were similar. Twilight shifted in place. She didn't like the way she felt when she thought about the imperfections of her own mentor.

"Right."

"Well. I guess we should keep moving, hunh? Twilight says.

"Yes," he agrees. "And forget about the skeleton."

The pair continue to take turns teleporting through the cave. As they travel, the silence continues to grow until they reach a certain point, where it suddenly relents.

"Do you hear that?" Fireheart says. "Trumpets."

"You mean?"

"Yes, we are almost there."

Twilight and Fireheart approach a strange wall on the cave. Behind it are sounds of music, commotion, and hoofsteps.

Twilight gasps with excitement, and then lightly squeals. "We're right under Canterlot!"

"Yeah, that's what I've been trying to tell you. Remember this switch, okay? You never know when you'll need to use it."

Fireheart places his hoof on a rock on the wall and pulls it down. The door slides outward. The two follow a long winding stone stairway as the commotion grows larger. Another door.

"Wait," Fireheart says.

"Why?"

Fireheart knocks seven times on the door, six in a quick fashion, the last more delayed. A few moments pass. A few moments more. Fireheart's face grows wrinkled. He steps back.

"Hunh? Usually that works...Unless...Something happened to Celestia?"

"Uh how about we try it one more time?"

Fireheart begins the knock again but is interrupted by a muffled, "Don't worry I hear you, but I need you to wait a few moments please."

A loud announcement is made. Neither Fireheart nor Twilight can tell the who or what, but slowly the commotion meanders over to a different room. Soon, quiet returns. Then, the door opens. The two step outside, only to see that Celestia's throne is moved, and there at the top of the stairway is the Princess herself. The two step out into the brightly lit throne room of the palace.

"Oh, Fireheart! Long time, no see! And Twilight, I see you found him after all! Wonderful! Any news on the Discord situation?"

Fireheart shakes out his mane. We were hoping you'd tell us. Anything unusual happen since Twilight's friend disappeared?"

"Not as far as I'm aware of, though Applebloom I hear now has two tails. Distressing and cruel as that is, it's far from a Equestria wide crisis."

"See?" Twilight glares at Firehoof. "I told you we had nothing to worry about."

"Why don't you two stay for a rest? That's no small tunnel. I'm sure you're exhausted."

Fireheart interjects. "No thank you, Princess. I need to make sure everyone else is okay."

"Well, if you insist, but I really don't think you have to wor--"

"I know." Firehoof scratches his ear. "This is just something I have to do."

"Well I for one am staying for a bit," Twilight says.

"What do you mean?"

"Look. I'm about to do a whole lot of traveling, going to places I never wanted to go in the first place. I'm hungry and tired from teleporting and so are you. You need a break. Besides, I have some catching up to do with the Princess."

"I'll break when I'm dead."

Celestia claps her hooves together in an excited fashion. "Oh an immortality joke! Wonderful!"

Fireheart and Twilight both deadpan.

"What?" Celestia smiles. "You two need to learn to relax sometimes."

Firehoof snorts and meanders out the door. He casts a spell that only he is aware of, one that allows him to more easily spot peculiar changes in his environment. He wanders for a time until he is out of Twilight and Celestia's sight.

"Good. I could use a break from him," Twilight half mutters.

"And why is that?" Celestia smiles down at her. "Is his abrasiveness getting to you?"

Twilight jumps up. "Oh, um Princess! I'm sorry. I didn't...think...you heard me." Twilight's face drops and turns flushed. "I know he used to be one of your students. I apologize."

"No need," Celestia says. "His abrasiveness gets to me sometimes too. There's a reason we haven't spoken in fifty years. Just know he wasn't always like that." She looks out one of the painted glass windows in the palace onto the outside garden. She takes a deep, peaceful breath.

Twilight joins her. "How do you do it, Celestia?"

"Hmm?"

"You have the most stressful job of anypony. How do you keep it together? You're always so peaceful."

"I have to be."

"You have to be?"

"If I wasn't, you know what would happen."

"Is it because you're immortal?"

"No actually. I have plenty of cause to worry for my subjects, even if I know I cannot be permanently harmed. It's more like this: There is always one thing or another threatening Equestria. Take for example, Discord's most recent antics. Is there cause for worry that he's done what he has to your friends? Of course. Do I let worry control me? Of course not. Whenever I'm in a situation like that, I ask myself a question. Have I done everything in my power to remedy the situation? If the answer is no, I go do what I can. If the answer is yes, I relax and cease to allow myself to worry. Worry will only cripple my effectiveness as a leader, which you can be sure will make the situation ten times worse. When there is nothing else you can do, the best solution is to wait, and maintain your composure."

The two princesses share a few moments of silence. Celestia's mane waves like a proud flag.

"Celestia, thank you."

"Whatever for?"

"The good advice."

Celestia smiles. "Anytime."

A few more moments.

"Why didn't you tell me about the tunnel?"

Celestia takes another deep breath. "Nopony should have to know about that tunnel, Twilight. It represents a part of Equestria's history that I'm not proud of. I should have figured you'd stumble upon it sooner or later. You've always were a curious one." She turns her head toward Twilight. "I'm sorry I hid it from you, but I'd do it again if I had a choice. It is a place of pain and sadness."

Twilight rubs her hoof upon the ground, uncertain if she should ask her next question. She looks back at the garden, radiating peace and glory. Such a drastic difference from the tunnel.

"Something wrong, Twilight?"

"I...okay. Here it goes," She straightens herself out and looks back at Celestia. "What happened to Fireheart when you first showed him the tunnel?"

"Oh yes. That. That was...some time ago. It was. Hmm." Twilight thinks of Fireheart's words as Celestia struggles to remember. "It was such a chaotic day for him. I remember that. Everything changed for him that day. Fireheart had devised a spell so powerful that he believed it could banish Discord from this plane of existence forever. Just when he was about to cast it, Discord made his family appear in front of him, his wife and two kids. Fireheart earnestly believed with all of his heart that it was another of Discord's tricks, and it was. Just not the trick that he thought it was. Fireheart believed Discord took the form of his family to make him not want to cast the spell, when instead he really teleported Fireheart's family in front of him to shield him from the magic. I don't think even Discord expected him to cast the spell. Discord was different back then, younger and more fierce, more fierce even then when the six of you first faced him."

"How is that even possible?"

"Oh he was. He was...He decided to make an example out of Fireheart. Knowing Fireheart would live in guilt for the rest of his days for what he did to his family, Discord decided it would be a good 'joke' to make him immortal." She looks over to her throne and back to Twilight. You know his cutie mark?"

Twilight pauses for a moment. She turns her head perplexedly to the side. That's strange. How did I miss his cutie Mark? That's so weird?

"Well actually, Celestia, I have to confess, I have no idea what his cutie mark is."

"You wouldn't. He doesn't have one."

"Wait. What? How?"

"I'm not sure exactly the reason, but it disappeared a few hours after the incident with Discord and his family. I don't know if it was Discord's magic, or his family's loss that caused it. Firehoof took it to mean he no longer had a purpose without his family. Discord enjoyed it all the more."

Twilight covers her mouth with her hoof. "That's terrible. I didn't know that part of the story."

"By the time he came to me, he was a broken Stallion. His entire personality just sunk that day. He was such a great student."

"You speak about him like he's no longer here."

"He's not the same Stallion that he was. When he got here, everypony assumed he purposely cast the spell on his family. Discord made sure to make his mischief in as public a setting as possible: Town square in Canterlot. Everypony was furious, demanding he be tried for his crimes. He explained what happened to me, but the only way I could prevent a riot was to tell them that he was being privately tried. After I led him down to the passage, I left him on his own and told the people of Canterlot that he had managed to escape before the trial could be finished."

Twilight raises her eyebrow. "Didn't ponies find that story, you know, suspicious?"

"Some did, but there was no evidence of it, and soon people started to forget. Now, few remember anything about it, except for the story."

"Wow," Twilight struggles for something to say. "Tough break."

Celestia lets out a half laugh. "Yeah. You said it."

The palace door swings open. In steps one of Celestia's assistants. "Celestia, are you coming, your Majesty?" She stops mid stride. "Oh, Twilight Sparkle, your Highness. I didn't see you come in."

"Oh, Heh. I guess I can be a little bit sneaky sometimes." Twilight posits a lame smile.

"Oh course, your Highness. Celestia Majesty?"

"Tell them I will be with them momentarily, Quill Dabber."

"Yes your Majesty." Quill Dabber steps out and Celestia flips the switch to move her throne back in place.

"I'm sorry Twilight, but I must go now. We are having a meeting to organize next year's Grand Galloping Galla," Celestia rolls her eyes in a very exaggerated motion. "Oh well. Duty calls."

Twilight nods to her and Celestia walks lightly out the door. Twilight tries to take one of Celestia's deep breaths. "Well," she mutters. "Now what?"

A quick puff answers Twilight and she jumps back. "What the?"

Next to her is a disheveled Fireheart. He leans over in a slump. "Fireheart, what are you--"

"Everything looks fine."

Twilight's body prepares to ask a question, but then she catches herself. She grabs his arm and helps him walk. "You know what? I've asked enough questions for one day. You need to rest. Come on. I know a room in the castle you can stay. It used to be my old room."

"You mean my old room."

Twilight rolls her eyes. "Whatever."


Author's Note

Well, this one was a little longer. Hope you all enjoy!

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