Pranking With Your Reverse Gender Self

by Surplus Flow

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Random
Length: 2335

It was Saturday morning. Surplus Flow had a day off, and why not spend it playing his computer. But then his reverse gender self appears. What do they do? Go pranking!

It was Saturday morning. Surplus Flow had a day off, and why not spend it playing his computer. But then his reverse gender self appears. What do they do? Go pranking!

A normal story with rule 63.
Constructive criticism appreciated.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-01-26 01:21:48 UTC

Part 1

Canterlot, Equestria

Flow Mansion

Surplus Flow looked across his front lawn from his room balcony. It was a Saturday, a day of peace for the commander. He took a large sniff of the air and exhaled. Opening his eyes, he turned back inside and made his way down the halls to his office.

He passed Lucky Service, his butler, who was bringing breakfast to his parent’s room.

“Good morning Lucky, how are you this fine Saturday morning?”

“Good sir. We have eggs and hash browns for breakfast. The garden tenders will be arriving during noon,” replied Lucky as he continued down the hall and made a left.

‘Father and mother will be going to a garden party this afternoon. River has work until nine, and I apparently have nothing to do.’

He pushed those thoughts away as he approached the office doors. They were old, but still durable and working. He took out his keys-which he conjured halfway to the door-and inserted it into the keyhole. He heard the click and pushed the doors, closing them once he got in.

Inside his office was a large wooden desk with a neat pile of papers. Various writing tools lay strewn across the desk itself. Behind the desk was a chair in which he sat his flank on. He used his magic to tidy up his desk.

Satisfied, he put his hoof under the desk pressing a secret button. With that press, a small section in the middle of the desk revealed an eye scanner. An orb inside a black box. He put his eye about half-a-foot away as the eye scanner started to scan his eye.

‘Oh Earth technology, how helpful you’ve been to Vortex for the last millennium.’ He thought.

He smirked as the eye scanner went back into the desk. Overhead, the ceiling parted above the desk, lowering a two computer screens hooked up to various wires. A keyboard and mouse dropped down afterwards.

Surplus use the mouse to start up the computer. When it had finally finished, a alert showed up titled “Massive Magic Energy Source Detected”. Intrigued, he opened it up revealing the location which was… in his backyard? He doubled checked.

It was no doubt that it was coming from his yard. He reached under his desk for another button. When he finally pressed it, the wall on his left swung around revealing a white wall. On the wall was his dual Five-Sevens, a M-4 modified to his liking, and a MP-5 also modified to his liking. There was also a HVS and a bullet-proof vest.

He took his Five-Sevens, the MP-5, the HVS, and the vest. The latter two were worn while he had both pistols in separate holsters. His MP-5 at hand, he pressed a button returning the wall back to place and bringing up the computer.

He closed the doors to his office and down the hall. Making his way to the stairs, he instead sat on the rail and slid down it. He made good time as his office was the fourth floor. He jumped off the railing towards the backyard entrance.

He peered outside my yard. The yard was huge, with various statues and hedges, including a fountain in the middle. There were benches situated along the statue bases for when there was a party.

The magic source was coming from the end of the yard so he moved quickly. He came upon site, on which he thought he saw a duplicate of himself.

***

Canterlot, Equestria

Stream Mansion

Five minutes ago

Excess Stream looked at the spellbook in her hooves. She flipped over to the page about crossing into a different world. The spell seemed so difficult because of the requirement of massive energy. Yet, her name was Excess, and her talent was having more than enough power, sometimes having more than the Princess herself.

She was ready to enter to this new world. She had her vest, HVS, her MP-5, and her dual Five-Sevens. She readied the spell causing a whirl wind in the room she was in. Her horn took on two different layers as she got more power into the spell. And then she was gone from existence. The wind calmed down, the spellbook laying on the floor.

***

Right now

Surplus looked at the look-alike in front of him. The pony was a mare with the same eye, coat, mane, and tail color like his.He raised his right foreleg as soon the mare also raised her right foreleg.

They stared at each other in complete silence, shocked at what they were seeing. He was the first one to speak.

“Hello.”

The mare replied, “Hello to you too.”

“So… what brings you here?”

“A world travelling spell.”

“I see.”

“Excuse me but what is your name?”

“Oh sorry, my name is Surplus Flow. How about yours?”

“Excess Stream, nice to meet you Surplus Flow.” He looked at her with curiosity as the she looked at him with curiosity also. Then their eyes set upon each other’s flank. They also had the same cutie mark, a four-pointed vortex with a atom in the middle, including a star between each point.

“So,” started Surplus as he drew a conclusion, “we must be opposite gender of each other.”

“I thought so too,” replied Excess. “I also see that we have the same loadout too.” She observed.

“So what now?” he asked.

Excess pondered for while and so did Surplus. Then they both started to grin.

Surplus said, “you thinking of what I’m thinking?”

“That we go prank the princesses, wait I mean the princes?”

“Yup. Follow me to my mansion.” Excess nodded as she followed Surplus back to the mansion. The mansion was exactly like hers. Same architecture, wallpaper, and decorations. She actually knew where he and she were going.

The basement.

Surplus opened the door to the basement using his keys to open them. Thankfully none of the butlers and maids saw them. They have never seen guns before, or even better technology than a fridge.

The basement had a nice feel to it as it wasn’t the type you would see in movies. It was more of a lounge. Surplus was about to press another secret button-which he loves so much-but Excess beat him. She had pressed the button and the walls began to turn around revealing a small armoury including a T.V.

There was section just for dedicated to all things pranks. Excess was excited to find a briefcase with the words "Caution" on it.

She asked, "is this what I think it is?"

"Yes, had it added to all the VCAPS. It doesn't use up much space. Some of the engineers asked why I commissioned this project. I just said, "none of your business"."

"Funny, hey can you tell me the Princes and Queens names?"

"Sure, there is Queen Celestia, mother of Prince Music Note. There is Queen Luna, mother of Prince Moonlight Draw."

"Let us prank Artem- I mean Luna!" Excess said gleefully as she brought the briefcase to a table and sofa facing the T.V. And opened it.

Surplus also came to the sofa carrying two cans of coke in his magic, straight from the Earth portal. He passes the other coke to Excess as she looks at the console that was inside the case.

Surplus picked up the remote turning the black screen on. He set the screen to a hidden camera. Queen Luna's position was outside having tea time with her sister, Queen Celestia.

He nodded and Excess flipped some switches before hitting a red button. The O.P.C.,or Orbital Pillow Cannon had just fired.

Part 2

The pillow flew at amazing speed breaking the atmosphere. It had charms to slow its speed so as not to kill the pony with sheer force. It also had a charm as to not catch on fire passing the atmosphere.

It passed several space junk, the majority space debris. The others were debris from the unknown satellites orbiting Equus. To a pony watching through a telescope, it would be brushed off as a star due to it having bright lights.

Then again, how would a pillow coming from the heavens look like?

***

Canterlot, Equestria

Castle Courtyards

“Sister, I feel uneasy, like something is about to happen,” said Queen Luna as she shivered.

“Do not worry Luna, I doubt it would be anything bad.”

“But sister, it feels like when you prank me.”

Queen Celestia just chuckled as she sipped the last of her tea. Setting down the saucer with the cup on it. She adjusted her crown before saying, “as I said before, it’s probably nothing. Now I must be off, the Day Court is about to begin.”

Celestia got off the cushion she was sitting on and left, but not before hearing Luna yell behind her, “sister, if this is a prank, I swear I will get you back!”

Luna realized that her sister was long gone. She placed down her saucer and refilled her cup with the teapot.

Then she flew off her cushion as something soft hit her, causing her to drop the teapot. It shattered into pieces as the Queen somehow managed to flip spinning the object that had hit her. And that somehow her head landed on that soft object.

She looked up pressing her hoof against her face. SHe looked down to see that the object that had hit her was a pillow. A fluffy and perfect pillow had hit her. A few feet across was her crown that had been knocked off when she was struck by the pillow.

Then an idea came to mind followed by rage. She opened up the pillow, and on the inside was the culprit written in bold letters “Return To Surplus Flow”. She grinned with anger and excitement as she took off towards the Flow Mansion.

***

Flow Residence

30 minutes later

“She’s behind us!” yelled Surplus as he made a sharp left. In front of him was Excess who still had the briefcase in her levitation. Luna was hot on their tail yelling, “Get back here Surplus Flow and your look-alike!”

“Excess fire the O.P.C. at her, it’s our only hope of surviving!”, yelled Surplus as he dodged a freeze spell from Luna.

“I know, I just fired VCAPS 7’s entire pillow storage, ETA 2 minutes!”

“I hope it’s enough to subdue Luna!”

***

15 minutes earlier

Surplus and Excess had taken off and stored their armour in the basement. They had left laughing at Luna being hit with the pillow. Deciding that a prank war was needed to decide who gets to choose the next victim.

The score was Surplus seven, and Excess’s seven also.

“Give up Excess!”

“Never!” yelled Excess as she made a mad dash through the yard. SUrplus was right behind her carrying several water balloons in his magic.

Excess made a right and hid behind a bush. Surplus ran past allowing her to conjure a pie and throw it at his head. He turned around, throwing his water balloons, then giggling like a foal ran past her.

She shook off the water and ran to the side of the mansion where the tool shed was. Next to the tool shed was the water hose. She turned valve and took the nozzle in her magic. A single drop of water came out.

She brought the nozzle to her face before it sprayed her in the face.  She shrieked as the hose drenched her. The hose whipped back and forth like a snake until she turned it off using her hooves to shield her face from the water.

Then she whipped back looking at the laughing stallion on the ground. Next to him was the hose in which he had stepped on.

“You should have seen the look on your face, priceless!”

He was cut off as another pie was launched at him. The pan slid off his face as two eyes appeared in the mess of pie goop on his face. Then the whole process started again, until a certain prank victim flew into yard.

She looked at the chaos caused by the one who pranked her and his look-alike who was a mare. She yelled in the Traditional Royal Canterlot Voice ,”Surplus Flow and your accomplice, we command you to stop this chaos and face the consequence for pranking us!”

The two ponies stopped in their tracks with Surplus levitating pies and a towel and Excess levitating water balloons. They looked at the Queen of night, then looking at each other. Their magic flinged all of their prank items covering the Queen in pies and water balloons.

The unicorns flee to the mansion heading for front door. There was a loud shriek from the Luna as Excess ran for the basement. Luna chased Surplus allowing Excess to gather the briefcase, two sunglasses, and a syringe launcher with in case of a angry or manic pony.

Surplus and Excess rejoined and ran away from the chasing Luna. They ran into the streets of Canterlot scaring nobles as they wondered why the night Queen was chasing two other nobles who looked alike.

***

Canterlot Castle

Now

Surplus dragged the unconscious body of the Luna. Surplus told the royal and lunar guards to back off as this was official business. They listened of course as he was the command-in-chief.

Luna had been knocked out by a lot of pillows, two syringes of sedatives, and a sleep spell. She could take a lot of hits while lusting for revenge. They dragged the body to Luna’s sleeping quarters.

Excess placed the briefcase and syringe gun down. Conjuring the two sunglasses, she gave one to Surplus and they made their way to balcony. It was lunchtime now so it would be Luna’s sleep time now.

They both put on their sunglasses before they said, “I guess that’s a night out.”

*The author has been punched before he could write Yeahhhhh after this horrible pun*