Fixer Upper: A Derpy and Doctor fanficby graceyadorableChaptersI Just don't know what went wrongAnything I can do to help?You okay?Opps! My Bad!I Just don't know what went wrongAssisting Fluttershy didn’t go well either. Derpy scared away the rabbits by accidentally falling backward into a bush, frightening the daylights out of a family of bluebirds. It took Fluttershy forever to gather them all back together, and Derpy had tried to help. She only managed to scatter them further. Finally, Fluttershy landed on the ground, Derpy following suit, albeit much less gracefully. “Um, I don’t mean to be rude, and I really do appreciate the help,” Fluttershy began carefully, “but I think that I can manage on my own from now on. Thanks for dropping by!” Derpy blinked, then scuffed the dirt with one hoof. “Okay.” “Oh, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, Derpy,” Fluttershy cried. “No, it’s okay,” Derpy said, forcing a smile. “I’m gonna go see if Twilight needs any help.” Twilight just nudged the last book into place, then stepped back and smiled with satisfaction. “A place for everything and everything in its place.” Turning her head, she said, “Isn’t that right, Spike?” The dragon lifted his head with a snort. “Wha? Oh, yeah. Sure.” He promptly rolled over and went back to sleep, though not before muttering, “And give me some warning next time you want me to stay up all night helping you clean.” Derpy burst in. “Hiya, Twilight!” Twilight jumped. “Oh! Hello, Derpy. Can I help you with anything?” Never down for long, Derpy bounced toward her, tripped over a table, and sprawled on the floor, looking up at her through her fluffy golden forelock, her crooked eyes twinkling. “I can to help you, Twilight!” “Oh, you--you did?” Twilight couldn’t hold back a shudder at the thought of this clumsy pony terrorizing her library, which she had spent all night cleaning up. Derpy acted like she didn’t notice. “Yeah! I’ve already tried helping everybody else out, and they all sent me away. So now I came to help you!” “Well, I just finished cleaning up in here--” Twilight started. “I get it. You don’t want me in here any more than everyone else does,” Derpy said sadly. “But I can help you get ready if you like,” Twilight finished. Derpy’s crooked golden eyes lit up, shining brighter than twin gemstones under the beam of a floodlight and she seized Twilight in a gigantic bearhug. “Oh, thank you! No pony’s ever offered to help me with anything before!” “Really?” Twilight asked. “That’s hard to believe. You’re a really nice pony!” Just a little clumsy. Okay, a lot clumsy. “When are we going?” Derpy tipped her head in the direction of the spa. “Oh, we’re not going there. It’s sure to be completely packed with all the other ponies who’re getting ready. No, I’ve got a better idea.” She began to trot off. “Follow me!” Derpy obeyed, and Twilight led her all the way out of Ponyville, down the road and to… “The Everfree Forest!” Derpy cried, then bounced right in, a huge, goofy grin on her face. “You’re not scared of this place?” Twilight asked in surprise, watching the gray pony roll around in the grass like it was the finest of carpets. “Not one bit!” Derpy said cheerfully, shaking her gray coat. “I love it in here! I come see my friend Zecora all the time!” “You’re friends with Zecora too?” Twilight asked with a smile, trotting into the forest. “Oh, yes. She’s the closest thing to a mother that I have,” Derpy said, looking happily at the deep green leaves and the long black shadows that crouched under the canopy of criss-crossing branches. “Ever since my real parents died when I was a filly, I’ve been going to see her! She’s nice, nice, nice! And she taught me my favorite muffin recipe ever!” “Well, that’s great that you have a maternal figure,” Twilight said. “Zecora agreed to help me get ready for the big party tonight since the spa is going to be so crowded!” “Rarity made me a dress,” Derpy smiled, flapping upside down in front of her. “Really? that’s sweet! What’s it look like?” “It’s long and white and it’s hemmed with gold and it’s really poofy, just like a cloud, and there’s a big ribbon around the waist and it’s so pretty!” Derpy gushed, bouncing up and down on a tree branch. On the third bounce, the branch broke and she went crashing down to the forest floor. “Woo! That was bumpy!” Derpy shook her head and grinned. Carefully, Twilight pulled a twig out of her mane. “Come on, let’s hurry to Zecora’s!” “Ah, hello, my young friends,” Zecora smiled, opening the door wide. “Come in, and your appearances I will tend.” Derpy greeted the zebra with a great big hug, and Twilight looked around with a smile. The inside of the cottage was, as always, pleasantly cluttered with books and foreign treasures. Masks, strange stones lined the shelves, and bizarre jugs hung from the ceiling. “Come on, Twilight,” Derpy chirped, then leaped right into the cauldron in the middle of the room, sending a spray of water everywhere. “Derpy! What are you doing? Get--” Twilight started, shocked, but she stopped when she heard Zecora laughing. “Don’t worry about it,” the zebra said, “Instead, come and sit.” She patted the space beside her and Twilight obeyed, watching as Derpy submerged in the cauldron, and presently, bubbles began to float out of the water and burst in the air. Every time they popped, they sent a sprinkle of rainbow powder floating back down, so that when Derpy stuck her head up again, it looked like she had been covered in runny rainbow paint. “Woohoo! This feels so good, Zecora!” Derpy cried, falling back in with a big splash. “What is that?” Twilight asked. Before Zecora could respond, Derpy popped up and said, “It’s this really cool herb mix that’s the BOMB for getting dirt and stuff off your coat! Hey! Zecora, this works really good with sticky chocolate syrup, too!” Deroy sank back in, and more bubbles floated out. Zecora turned and pulled a mug off the shelf near her shoulder and took a deep gulp. “Forgive me; my throat is horribly sore. But this tea helps. I must make more.” She clopped off to the other side of the room. Derpy burst out of the cauldron in a shower of multi hued liquid and shook herself vigorously until her coat puffed out like a dandelion ready to spread its seeds. “Look how fluffy I am, Twilight!” She chirped happily. Zecora handed her a towel and Derpy began to smooth down her gray coat, which now glistened like gray fluorite, and her golden mane was silky soft and shiny. “Wow, you look pretty!” Twilight said, but she sounded just a tad too surprised. “I feel pretty!” Derpy trilled. “I feel pretty and witty and bright!” Twilight and Zecora started to laugh as Derpy bounced around the room. The time for the party came much too quickly, and soon Derpy was ready to go. She was in her beautiful dress, flying to Canterlot. It had been decided that the new colt’s arrival would be celebrated in the same castle as the Grand Galloping Gala, and to get in, every pony had to register. Derpy had done that weeks ago, and she was practically giddy with excitement. The night air was cool and crisp, and it made her feel alive, free, like there was nothing any pony could say to her that would make her feel sad or embarrassed ever again. Night flights were always her favorite, but flying under the stars in a beautiful dress while going to meet the pony who was the reason she was alive? It was almost more than her muffin-loving heart could bear. When she got there, it looked as though every pony in all of Equestria was there. Swooping down, she snagged a spot in the long line before more ponies filed up to the admittance desk, behind which sat a calm brown pony with a pencil for a Cutie Mark. Derpy wanted to bounce up and down and run in circles with wild excitement, but she didn’t want to ruin her dress. She kept perfectly still, her eyes shining like twin gemstones, and grinned in excitement as snow began to fall from the skies of Canterlot. The palace lights were already glowing like stars had been placed in every towering stained glass window, and she could hear a fast and funky rock-’n-roll tune blasting from inside. Derpy couldn’t dance without injury involved, but she loved parties all the same. She bet that Pinkie Pie had already taken all the decorations and food inside from where she was designing them at her house. Looking around, inching ever closer to the front of the line, she saw dresses and suits with Rarity’s distinctive and stylish flair to them, and look! There was Rainbow Dash flying with the Wonderbolts! She could smell Applejack’s cooking, and the aroma made her mouth water and her stomach gurgle embarrassingly loudly. Twilight was almost certain to be talking to Princess Celestia. The Princess! Derpy’s heart was about to explode from too much happiness, and she couldn’t resist giving a little hop of joy. At last, the brown mare looked down at Derpy. “Name?” “Derpy Hooves,” Derpy said cheerfully, her eyes sparkling. The pony flipped through the register, carefully scanning the pages, her large, dark green eyes skimming down the columns of names and registrations. “Miss...Derpy?” “That’s me!” “I’m afraid you’re not in the register.” Anything I can do to help?Derpy felt like she had just been kicked. “What?” “I’m sorry, miss, but you’re not in the register and, I’m afraid, cannot be admitted.” “But I’ve registered!” Derpy exclaimed, blushing with embarrassment as hot tears pricked at her eyes like little claws. “Well, you don’t show up here,” the brown mare said patiently. “I’m sorry. Next!” “No, you don’t understand!” Derpy cried, rearing onto her back legs and putting her forehooves on the desk. “I’ve registered! I’m supposed to be here!” The brown mare nudged her away with an impatient snort. “I’m sorry, miss, but you’re not registered and therefore are not allowed inside. You’re holding up the line, so please go home.” Derpy stood in the snow, her face hot with embarrassment and her eyes swimming with unshed tears. A stallion, big and brawny and black, shoved past her, and she tripped on the hem of her dress and fell in the snow. Some of the ponies started to laugh, and some pointed at her. Others looked like they weren’t sure to laugh or not, and others just ignored her, but not a single one stepped out of line to help her. She got to her feet and fled, her hooves crunching in the snow and her breath coming in pale, smoky clouds as she put as much distance between herself and the despicable line as she could before finding a rock under a tree, clambering up on it, and finally letting the tears flow. They streamed down her burning face and fell into the snow, sending up the faintest swirls of steam. Derpy cried and cried, and she knew that she was probably overreacting, but she had been looking forward to this for weeks and weeks, and now she had been told that she couldn’t even go inside! All those dreams for nothing. She had spent days imagining out what she would say to the mysterious colt who had saved her mother while she was still expecting, had doodled for hours pictures of her ideal dress, which Rarity had so kindly made. She might as well return the dress; she would never have an excuse to wear it again. It was much too fine and precious a thing to wear on any day, and Derpy had never been invited to a party in her life because she was just so clumsy! At last, her sobs quieted and she got the courage to lift her head and look at the castle. It looked like a picture out of a fairy tale; ablaze with lights and frosted by the crystalline white snow that fell from the sky like dancing lazy rain, sparkling in the firelight like blankets of the finest diamond dust. She could hear the music, a lively rock and roll tune that moved even the most reluctant hooves to dance, and she found herself flicking her tail to the beat. Indistinct buzzings of chatter seasoned the air like pepper and cinnamon, and Derpy heaved a heavy sigh that came from the very bottom of her little broken heart. Twilight had had to go early to speak with the Princess; otherwise, Derpy was sure that her friend would help her get in. But no. Twilight was there, in the heart of the warmth and dancing and enchantment and lighthearted frivolity, and Derpy was out here, in the cold, in the snow, shivering and wet with tears. It wasn’t fair! Derpy had always been so careful not to let any pony see anything besides a cheerful smile on her face, but really, she knew what the others said about her. She had heard every remark about her clumsiness, knew every snide comment that had been whispered behind a hoof. But this…. She slowly pulled off her dress. There was no need for finery anymore. Besides, her cursed clumsiness would probably mean that she’d trip on the perfect hemline and fall in the mud or something like that. She would give it back to Rarity later. Slowly flapping her beautiful gray wings, she rose into the sky and flew away, letting the tears continue to flow. As she soared sadly through the snowy white sky, however, she could feel the salty tears freezing on her face, hardening in her coat. She was so lost in her own thoughts of sadness and anger at somebody’s fool headed mistake that she didn’t realize that she had flown into a thunder blizzard until she felt the sky rock with an unbelievably loud KABOOM! Derpy screamed and dropped the dress as she beat her wings as fast and hard as she could, trying to find a way out of the black clouds that rained sleet and snow and icy hail down on her, stinging her wings and coat, striking her face and neck. She ducked and dodged and plummeted, but nothing helped. She was stuck in the storm. Lightning flashed around her and illuminated the ominous and dangerous--perhaps deadly--shapes of the billowing clouds around her, all of them black bleached silver by the flash of lightning that gave her a half a second of sight before she went blind again. “Help me!” Derpy screamed, though she knew that nobody would hear her. Folding in her wings, she dove down toward the earth, racing the rain and going perhaps fast enough to create a sonic rainboom were there sun to make a rainbow. There were lights on the ground below her. Were they somehow prolonged reflections of the lightning? Was it the snow? A fire? Ponyville? Where was she? At that moment, a sudden and violent gust of wind snatched her in a freezing and insubstantial fist, rolling her head over heels and around and around and around like she was a wooden block in a dryer. She was shaken and joggled and tossed around for so long that she lost all sense of direction and didn’t know if she were falling or being hurled up toward the heavens. The dark clouds above her whirled and she closed her eyes tightly and shook her head, trying to regain control, but her wings were pinned to her sides. At last, she realized that she was falling. She fainted just before she crashed through the roof of the palace in Canterlot. You okay?Derpy stirred, and a torrent of whispers met her ears. “She’s not dead!” “What’s she doing here?” “Some entrance, right? She’d do anything for attention!” Then, a new voice, pleasantly between high and very deep, spoke up above the rest. “Quiet! Is all you can think about this poor pony’s faults when she just crashed through the roof, obviously blown in by the storm?” There was a faint buzzing, more mechanical than bees, and a blue light shone on Derpy’s closed eyes. “Come on,” the voice coaxed, quiet enough so that only she could hear it. Some pony was lightly stroking her forelock with his muzzle. “Come on, beautiful, let’s see those eyes.” “No!” Derpy whispered, fierce although it was faint. “Spirited, huh?” The new pony chuckled softly. “That’s what I like to see. Now come on, show me your pretty eyes.” Her golden, wandering eyes had never been described as pretty, and she was hesitant to obey, but there was something, just something, about that voice that made her choose to trust the speaker. Timidly, she blinked and lifted her head. “There we go!” The pony grinned. He was almost ridiculously handsome, with a light brown coat, like pale brown sugar, and that sugar-pelt was shining and glossy beneath the bright, multicolored lights. His mane was scruffy and the rich dark brown of chocolate. His forelock fell onto his forehead with careless and casual elegance, and his matching tail hung to his hocks. His eyes sparkled at her like cobalt blue gemstones, sweet and gentle like a midnight breeze. He leaned down and kindly helped her rise to her shaky feet. “D-did I hurt anybody?” Derpy asked, her ears drooping and her head lowering. “No, but you certainly ruined the party!” Rainbow Dash snapped. “The Wonderbolts and I were about to make our grand entrance!” “That’s enough!” The new pony said sharply, his ears flattening in anger. “Do you even care that she could have been seriously hurt? Is all you can think about your spoiled entrance when she might have died?” Rainbow Dash dropped her head and stared sulkily at the ground. “Now then,” said the colt, turning on Derpy. Uh oh! Now I’m really gonna catch it! Derpy thought, shrinking backward, her stomach churning like Pinkie Pie’s blender were whirling away on full blast. After all, what else could he do but shout at her? She immediately recognized him as the colt in whose honor the part was for, and she had just wrecked it by coming in through the roof when she wasn’t even in the register! She had broken the castle, and she could even see Princess Celestia staring at her in shock. She hung her head, her cheeks red with shame. He leaned close to her and whispered, “Would you like to come back to my place after this kerfuffle is over?” Derpy stared at him in shock and a bit of revulsion, but he said, “No, no, it’s nothing like that. You just look like you could use some fixing up.” Derpy followed his gaze to the scratches and little cuts all over her body and wings, then nodded shyly. “Fantastic!” He said, then turned and raised his head to look at Princess Celestia. “I’m very sorry about all this, Majesty,” he said. She blinked, then smiled. “It’s all right, Doctor. Is our young friend okay?” This ‘Doctor’ looked at Derpy, who nodded again. Swishing her tail in embarrassment, she said, “I gotta go...I’m not allowed in here.” “Why?” The Doctor pony asked. “Some pony made a mistake and I’m not in the register,” she mumbled, backing away further. “That’s ridiculous!” The Doctor exclaimed. Stepping close to her, he said, “You can stay here as my guest.” Derpy’s eyes began to shine and she positively glowed with happiness. “R-really?” The Doctor winked at her. “Sure.” After the party had left, Derpy stood quietly in the corner while the Doctor chatted pleasantly with Princess Celestia, thanking her for the party and wishing her well. Derpy smiled as the handsome colt walked over to her, then took off his coat and draped it around her shoulders. “Don’t want a pretty filly like you getting a cold, do we?” Derpy blushed brightly, her cheeks turning rosebud pink, and she didn’t say anything. Derpy, although no pony would believe it, was actually very skilled at reading body language, and there was nothing about the Doctor that suggested that he was being anything but kind. Sure, his doting was a wee bit flirtatious, but he didn’t do it because he wanted her, or anything like that. He was just a genuinely kind soul who knew just how to help. He kept close to her side as the two walked through the snow, walked because, unlike Derpy, the Doctor did not have wings. “So,” Derpy said shyly, the crunching of snow filling the night as she walked next to him, “Do you have a name besides Doctor?” He glanced at her out of the corner of his shimmering cobalt eye. “It’s just Doctor.” Derpy nodded. She understood perfectly. He probably had an awkward name like Shiny Sand, judging from his hourglass Cutie Mark. Well, she had no right to judge; after all, her name was Derpy. “I’m Derpy, by the way.” Oh, please, don’t laugh at my name! “Derpy?” The Doctor asked, a smile spreading over his face. His eyes twinkled with barely suppressed laughter. She stared at the ground, her face hot and her stomach squirming with embarrassment. The Doctor finally had to laugh, and he nudged her shoulder playfully. “That’s the cutest name I’ve ever heard!” Derpy’s head jerked up and she actually stopped walking, just staring at him in shock. “Really?” She squeaked. He grinned at her. “Really.” Lifting his head higher, he looked around and said, “Come on. It’s not far from here.” “So you’ve saved Ponyville before?” Derpy asked, loving the warmth of his coat around her shoulders. “Yeah,” the Doctor said offhandedly, and from his tone he wasn’t bragging. “Do….do you remember a black Pegasus mare with a gold mane and tail?” Derpy whispered shyly, feeling a tremor of excitement and nervousness rushing up through her like a waterfall breaking free from winter’s ice. “She had ballet shoes as her Cutie Mark?” The Doctor lifted his head to the sky and closed his eyes as he walked, the soft white snow dusting his mane and face like little flakes of sugar. “Yes, I remember her. Mist Chaser, correct?” Derpy squealed and the Doctor jumped, startled. “What’d you do that for?” “That was my mother! She was pregnant with me when you saved her and then that means that it’s because of you that I’m alive and thank you!” Her words came out in a tumble as she tackled him in a hug. They crashed into the snow and sent up a plumy spray, like that of waves breaking over rocks. Derpy realized what she had done, then jumped up with a frantic apology. “I’m sorry! So so so sorry! I didn’t mean to do that, I just didn’t think and--” The Doctor slowly got to his feet and Derpy was terrified that she had hurt him. But then he grinned at her. “You’re welcome. My place is just ahead.” He led Derpy onward through the falling snow to where the silhouette of a tall, curious blue box awaited them. Derpy looked at the box on all sides, then frowned. “This is a pretty little house, Mr. Doctor,” she said matter-of-factly, trotting around it twice. The Doctor’s voice had a smile in it as he said, “You’ll be surprised.” Derpy looked the strange blue box up and down, up and down, then, swishing her long golden tail to flick away the snowflakes, she trotted after him and went inside. Opps! My Bad!“DERPY! STOP. TRYING. TO. HELP!” It took an awful lot of mishaps to make even Pinkie Pie lose her temper, but….Derpy hung her head, her creamy blonde forelock falling over her teary golden eyes. “I-I’m sorry, I really am, but…” “You crushed the cake, you burned the cupcakes, you let the ice cream melt, you somehow managed to slop paint all over the couch, you made a hole in my wall when you were trying to put up the banner and accidentally put a nail through your hoof!” “It was an accident,” Derpy protested quietly, trying not to cry. Pinkie Pie went on as if she hadn’t spoken. “I sent you into the kitchen to cook, and it’s a disaster! There’s syrup making the floor all sticky, the utensils are everywhere, the smoke alarm’s gone off four times in twenty minutes, you can’t even read a recipe--” “Pinkie, I--” Derpy tried. She was cut off again. “You somehow managed to dismantle the microwave, and the only food you didn’t burn was the muffins, but even then you forgot the flour!” “My bad,” Derpy whispered sheepishly, her head hanging lower and her tail brushing the ground. “Go help Applejack pick some apples!” Pinkie went on, though she sounded less angry. “She could use a Pegasus, and Rainbow Dash is clearing the sky while Fluttershy is busy with the animals.” Derpy shook out her flour-covered wings, the feathers sticky with drying chocolate syrup, and took off, flapping out the door in a crooked, lopsided way, bonking her head on the top of the door as she went. Applejack was pleased to see her. “Howdy there, pard’ner!” She shouted cheerily. “I need an extra pair of hooves to help with these here apples! Gotta get a bunch for that party today, y’know!” “I’m so excited to see who saved Ponyville before! How come he hasn’t come sooner?” Derpy chirped, getting tangled in the branches and knocking about five apples to the ground. “Me too. But he’s probably busy with some important stuff,” Applejack said, bucking a tree square in the trunk. Apples fell into the bucket with a staccato thumping that sounded like drumbeats. “Ooh! You could make music with the apples!” Derpy cried, a crooked grin spreading over her face. “Let me try!” Before Applejack could say anything, Derpy grabbed the tree in a big bear hug and shook it as hard as she could, the leaves rattling together like microscopic pebbles. The apples certainly came off, but they were quickly covered by a hailstorm of aromatic verdian foliage as every leaf fell off as well. “Oh….sorry!” Derpy cried, trying to dive and pick up an apple and only managing to crash into the ground in a tangle of legs and wings and fluffy blonde hair. Applejack blinked, then smiled. “Don’t worry about it, sugarplum. There’s plenty of other trees.” Trotting over to one, she said, “Now, watch me.” She nailed the tree with a mighty buck, the sound echoing around the whole of Sweet Apple Acres, and like ruby red rain, the sweet fruit came loose and plunked into buckets. “See? Ya gotta kick the tree, not shake it.” “Oh! Okay!” Derpy cried, then bounded over to a giant tree with branches so heavy with apples that they were dragged toward the ground. Lunging forward onto her forelegs, she thrust out her heels in a heavy buck--that completely missed the tree and hit a bucket of freshly collected apples, spilling them all over the ground. “Oops! My bad!” Derpy cried, starting forward to refill the bucket, but Applejack stopped her. “Just go buck down some more apples, sugarcube,” she said patiently. “And don’t worry about it. I’ve kicked over my fair share of buckets, too.” Feeling better because she wasn’t the only one who made such mistakes, Derpy cantered over to another tree. She braced her hind legs up against it and then kicked hard, and this time she didn’t miss the tree. What did miss, however, were all those apples. Not a single one made it into the bucket. Derpy couldn’t seem to do anything right, and finally, after she somehow managed to push a wheelbarrow into a lake, Applejack came up to her and said, “Um, look, Derpy, why don’t you go help Rarity? It can’t be easy with all them dresses, I reckon.” “Okay!” Derpy trilled, pretending to be enthusiastic, but she knew Applejack’s motivation. She just kept getting in the way. Flapping off through Ponyville, Derpy landed on Rarity’s doorstep, tripped, and toppled over. Getting up again and shaking her head and wings, she tapped on the door with one hoof and waited. A flustered-looking Rarity opened the door. There were pins in her mouth and a tape measure wound around one leg. Her luscious purple mane was frizzy and tangled, and her normally flawless makeup job was smudged. She definitely needed some help, all right. “Oh! Um, Derpy, hello, can I help you? Do you like your dress?” “Oh, I love it!” Derpy beamed. “It’s the most prettiest thing I’ve ever owned!” “Well, I’m certainly glad,” Rarity said with a strained smile. “But if you’ll excuse me, I really have no time to spare….” “Applejack sent me to help you!” Derpy told her, eyes sparkling. “She...she did?” Why? She knows that Derpy is the clumsiest pony for miles! I can’t have her in here! She’d ruin everything! “Well, I’m almost done with the last dress, so…..why don’t you go find Twilight or Rainbow Dash or Fluttershy? I’m sure they’re more in need of help than I am.” Rarity gave an airy laugh and closed the door quickly. Derpy’s ears drooped as she walked slowly away. She had seen the inside of the shop. Half-cut dresses, dresses that needed to be hemmed, fabric to fold, ribbons to tie...the place was an absolute catastrophe….Rarity may need her help, but she wouldn’t accept it. Rainbow Dash was flying around, looping the loop and doing barrel rolls, spinning through loops in the clouds and creating a red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple blur in the cerulean backdrop of the endless sky. Derpy watched, wide-eyed, as the blue Pegasus bucked, slammed, and whammied the clouds right out of the sky, sending them in every direction like beautiful white balls of fluffy. Derpy stretched out her wings and jumped up into the air. “Hi, Rainbow Dash!” Rainbow Dash looked down. “Hi, Derpy.” “Rarity sent me to help you clear the sky!” Derpy stated, and if it were possible for somebody to bounce up and down in midair, she was doing exactly that. Rainbow Dash looked around at all the clouds. “I could clear this sky in twenty seconds,” she bragged, “but sure, you can come up here.” Derpy flew a lopsided loop-the-loop and kicked her forelegs in excitement. “Oh boy!” She rocketed off, then whirled in the air and bucked a heavy cloud. Unfortunately, it didn’t explode harmlessly like the others did. A lightning bolt shot out and hit Derpy, sending her cartwheeling head over heels, making her mane frizz out even worse than Rarity’s and making her tail look like an electrified hedgehog. “Woo! That was some shock, huh Rainbow Dash?” Rainbow Dash closed her eyes. “Just get on with it, Derpy.” “Okey-dokey!” Derpy flew back in for another go, and another bolt shot out, this time shooting right between Rainbow Dash’s ears. “Yikes! Careful, Derpy! Watch it!” “Sorry!” Derpy flapped awkwardly over to her. “Can you show me how you do it?” “Watch the master at work!” Rainbow Dash grinned smugly, then soared off, slamming her hind feet into a cloud with somewhat unnecessary ferocity. Derpy tried to copy her, but the cloud just burst into five littler ones. “Jeez, Derpy! Haven’t you ever cleared a sky before?” “I just don’t know what went wrong!” Derpy chirped, bouncing up and down in midflight. “And no pony’s ever let me clear the sky before!” “Gee, I wonder why,” Rainbow Dash muttered. “I’m so excited to see the new colt!” Derpy cried, flipping onto her back and flying at another cloud. “Is it true he’s really saved Ponyville before?” “Yes,” Rainbow Dash answered, seeming exasperated. “It was way before any of us were born, when the mayor was just a filly herself.” “The mayor told me he saved my mother when she was gonna have me!” Derpy beamed, accidentally electrocuting herself again. Rainbow Dash chose not to say the smart remark that she was thinking at the moment. Instead, she said, “Derpy, you keep zapping yourself, and I don’t really need your help anyway. Go help Fluttershy instead!” Derpy stopped bouncing up and down on top of a raincloud. “But…..” “Go!” Rainbow Dash ordered. “Go help her round up a bunch of rabbits or catch some birds or something.” Derpy stared at the ground, far, far below, as she slowly flew away, rejected yet again. Author's Note First Chapter so far! I have more to come!
I Just don't know what went wrongAssisting Fluttershy didn’t go well either. Derpy scared away the rabbits by accidentally falling backward into a bush, frightening the daylights out of a family of bluebirds. It took Fluttershy forever to gather them all back together, and Derpy had tried to help. She only managed to scatter them further. Finally, Fluttershy landed on the ground, Derpy following suit, albeit much less gracefully. “Um, I don’t mean to be rude, and I really do appreciate the help,” Fluttershy began carefully, “but I think that I can manage on my own from now on. Thanks for dropping by!” Derpy blinked, then scuffed the dirt with one hoof. “Okay.” “Oh, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, Derpy,” Fluttershy cried. “No, it’s okay,” Derpy said, forcing a smile. “I’m gonna go see if Twilight needs any help.” Twilight just nudged the last book into place, then stepped back and smiled with satisfaction. “A place for everything and everything in its place.” Turning her head, she said, “Isn’t that right, Spike?” The dragon lifted his head with a snort. “Wha? Oh, yeah. Sure.” He promptly rolled over and went back to sleep, though not before muttering, “And give me some warning next time you want me to stay up all night helping you clean.” Derpy burst in. “Hiya, Twilight!” Twilight jumped. “Oh! Hello, Derpy. Can I help you with anything?” Never down for long, Derpy bounced toward her, tripped over a table, and sprawled on the floor, looking up at her through her fluffy golden forelock, her crooked eyes twinkling. “I can to help you, Twilight!” “Oh, you--you did?” Twilight couldn’t hold back a shudder at the thought of this clumsy pony terrorizing her library, which she had spent all night cleaning up. Derpy acted like she didn’t notice. “Yeah! I’ve already tried helping everybody else out, and they all sent me away. So now I came to help you!” “Well, I just finished cleaning up in here--” Twilight started. “I get it. You don’t want me in here any more than everyone else does,” Derpy said sadly. “But I can help you get ready if you like,” Twilight finished. Derpy’s crooked golden eyes lit up, shining brighter than twin gemstones under the beam of a floodlight and she seized Twilight in a gigantic bearhug. “Oh, thank you! No pony’s ever offered to help me with anything before!” “Really?” Twilight asked. “That’s hard to believe. You’re a really nice pony!” Just a little clumsy. Okay, a lot clumsy. “When are we going?” Derpy tipped her head in the direction of the spa. “Oh, we’re not going there. It’s sure to be completely packed with all the other ponies who’re getting ready. No, I’ve got a better idea.” She began to trot off. “Follow me!” Derpy obeyed, and Twilight led her all the way out of Ponyville, down the road and to… “The Everfree Forest!” Derpy cried, then bounced right in, a huge, goofy grin on her face. “You’re not scared of this place?” Twilight asked in surprise, watching the gray pony roll around in the grass like it was the finest of carpets. “Not one bit!” Derpy said cheerfully, shaking her gray coat. “I love it in here! I come see my friend Zecora all the time!” “You’re friends with Zecora too?” Twilight asked with a smile, trotting into the forest. “Oh, yes. She’s the closest thing to a mother that I have,” Derpy said, looking happily at the deep green leaves and the long black shadows that crouched under the canopy of criss-crossing branches. “Ever since my real parents died when I was a filly, I’ve been going to see her! She’s nice, nice, nice! And she taught me my favorite muffin recipe ever!” “Well, that’s great that you have a maternal figure,” Twilight said. “Zecora agreed to help me get ready for the big party tonight since the spa is going to be so crowded!” “Rarity made me a dress,” Derpy smiled, flapping upside down in front of her. “Really? that’s sweet! What’s it look like?” “It’s long and white and it’s hemmed with gold and it’s really poofy, just like a cloud, and there’s a big ribbon around the waist and it’s so pretty!” Derpy gushed, bouncing up and down on a tree branch. On the third bounce, the branch broke and she went crashing down to the forest floor. “Woo! That was bumpy!” Derpy shook her head and grinned. Carefully, Twilight pulled a twig out of her mane. “Come on, let’s hurry to Zecora’s!” “Ah, hello, my young friends,” Zecora smiled, opening the door wide. “Come in, and your appearances I will tend.” Derpy greeted the zebra with a great big hug, and Twilight looked around with a smile. The inside of the cottage was, as always, pleasantly cluttered with books and foreign treasures. Masks, strange stones lined the shelves, and bizarre jugs hung from the ceiling. “Come on, Twilight,” Derpy chirped, then leaped right into the cauldron in the middle of the room, sending a spray of water everywhere. “Derpy! What are you doing? Get--” Twilight started, shocked, but she stopped when she heard Zecora laughing. “Don’t worry about it,” the zebra said, “Instead, come and sit.” She patted the space beside her and Twilight obeyed, watching as Derpy submerged in the cauldron, and presently, bubbles began to float out of the water and burst in the air. Every time they popped, they sent a sprinkle of rainbow powder floating back down, so that when Derpy stuck her head up again, it looked like she had been covered in runny rainbow paint. “Woohoo! This feels so good, Zecora!” Derpy cried, falling back in with a big splash. “What is that?” Twilight asked. Before Zecora could respond, Derpy popped up and said, “It’s this really cool herb mix that’s the BOMB for getting dirt and stuff off your coat! Hey! Zecora, this works really good with sticky chocolate syrup, too!” Deroy sank back in, and more bubbles floated out. Zecora turned and pulled a mug off the shelf near her shoulder and took a deep gulp. “Forgive me; my throat is horribly sore. But this tea helps. I must make more.” She clopped off to the other side of the room. Derpy burst out of the cauldron in a shower of multi hued liquid and shook herself vigorously until her coat puffed out like a dandelion ready to spread its seeds. “Look how fluffy I am, Twilight!” She chirped happily. Zecora handed her a towel and Derpy began to smooth down her gray coat, which now glistened like gray fluorite, and her golden mane was silky soft and shiny. “Wow, you look pretty!” Twilight said, but she sounded just a tad too surprised. “I feel pretty!” Derpy trilled. “I feel pretty and witty and bright!” Twilight and Zecora started to laugh as Derpy bounced around the room. The time for the party came much too quickly, and soon Derpy was ready to go. She was in her beautiful dress, flying to Canterlot. It had been decided that the new colt’s arrival would be celebrated in the same castle as the Grand Galloping Gala, and to get in, every pony had to register. Derpy had done that weeks ago, and she was practically giddy with excitement. The night air was cool and crisp, and it made her feel alive, free, like there was nothing any pony could say to her that would make her feel sad or embarrassed ever again. Night flights were always her favorite, but flying under the stars in a beautiful dress while going to meet the pony who was the reason she was alive? It was almost more than her muffin-loving heart could bear. When she got there, it looked as though every pony in all of Equestria was there. Swooping down, she snagged a spot in the long line before more ponies filed up to the admittance desk, behind which sat a calm brown pony with a pencil for a Cutie Mark. Derpy wanted to bounce up and down and run in circles with wild excitement, but she didn’t want to ruin her dress. She kept perfectly still, her eyes shining like twin gemstones, and grinned in excitement as snow began to fall from the skies of Canterlot. The palace lights were already glowing like stars had been placed in every towering stained glass window, and she could hear a fast and funky rock-’n-roll tune blasting from inside. Derpy couldn’t dance without injury involved, but she loved parties all the same. She bet that Pinkie Pie had already taken all the decorations and food inside from where she was designing them at her house. Looking around, inching ever closer to the front of the line, she saw dresses and suits with Rarity’s distinctive and stylish flair to them, and look! There was Rainbow Dash flying with the Wonderbolts! She could smell Applejack’s cooking, and the aroma made her mouth water and her stomach gurgle embarrassingly loudly. Twilight was almost certain to be talking to Princess Celestia. The Princess! Derpy’s heart was about to explode from too much happiness, and she couldn’t resist giving a little hop of joy. At last, the brown mare looked down at Derpy. “Name?” “Derpy Hooves,” Derpy said cheerfully, her eyes sparkling. The pony flipped through the register, carefully scanning the pages, her large, dark green eyes skimming down the columns of names and registrations. “Miss...Derpy?” “That’s me!” “I’m afraid you’re not in the register.”
Anything I can do to help?Derpy felt like she had just been kicked. “What?” “I’m sorry, miss, but you’re not in the register and, I’m afraid, cannot be admitted.” “But I’ve registered!” Derpy exclaimed, blushing with embarrassment as hot tears pricked at her eyes like little claws. “Well, you don’t show up here,” the brown mare said patiently. “I’m sorry. Next!” “No, you don’t understand!” Derpy cried, rearing onto her back legs and putting her forehooves on the desk. “I’ve registered! I’m supposed to be here!” The brown mare nudged her away with an impatient snort. “I’m sorry, miss, but you’re not registered and therefore are not allowed inside. You’re holding up the line, so please go home.” Derpy stood in the snow, her face hot with embarrassment and her eyes swimming with unshed tears. A stallion, big and brawny and black, shoved past her, and she tripped on the hem of her dress and fell in the snow. Some of the ponies started to laugh, and some pointed at her. Others looked like they weren’t sure to laugh or not, and others just ignored her, but not a single one stepped out of line to help her. She got to her feet and fled, her hooves crunching in the snow and her breath coming in pale, smoky clouds as she put as much distance between herself and the despicable line as she could before finding a rock under a tree, clambering up on it, and finally letting the tears flow. They streamed down her burning face and fell into the snow, sending up the faintest swirls of steam. Derpy cried and cried, and she knew that she was probably overreacting, but she had been looking forward to this for weeks and weeks, and now she had been told that she couldn’t even go inside! All those dreams for nothing. She had spent days imagining out what she would say to the mysterious colt who had saved her mother while she was still expecting, had doodled for hours pictures of her ideal dress, which Rarity had so kindly made. She might as well return the dress; she would never have an excuse to wear it again. It was much too fine and precious a thing to wear on any day, and Derpy had never been invited to a party in her life because she was just so clumsy! At last, her sobs quieted and she got the courage to lift her head and look at the castle. It looked like a picture out of a fairy tale; ablaze with lights and frosted by the crystalline white snow that fell from the sky like dancing lazy rain, sparkling in the firelight like blankets of the finest diamond dust. She could hear the music, a lively rock and roll tune that moved even the most reluctant hooves to dance, and she found herself flicking her tail to the beat. Indistinct buzzings of chatter seasoned the air like pepper and cinnamon, and Derpy heaved a heavy sigh that came from the very bottom of her little broken heart. Twilight had had to go early to speak with the Princess; otherwise, Derpy was sure that her friend would help her get in. But no. Twilight was there, in the heart of the warmth and dancing and enchantment and lighthearted frivolity, and Derpy was out here, in the cold, in the snow, shivering and wet with tears. It wasn’t fair! Derpy had always been so careful not to let any pony see anything besides a cheerful smile on her face, but really, she knew what the others said about her. She had heard every remark about her clumsiness, knew every snide comment that had been whispered behind a hoof. But this…. She slowly pulled off her dress. There was no need for finery anymore. Besides, her cursed clumsiness would probably mean that she’d trip on the perfect hemline and fall in the mud or something like that. She would give it back to Rarity later. Slowly flapping her beautiful gray wings, she rose into the sky and flew away, letting the tears continue to flow. As she soared sadly through the snowy white sky, however, she could feel the salty tears freezing on her face, hardening in her coat. She was so lost in her own thoughts of sadness and anger at somebody’s fool headed mistake that she didn’t realize that she had flown into a thunder blizzard until she felt the sky rock with an unbelievably loud KABOOM! Derpy screamed and dropped the dress as she beat her wings as fast and hard as she could, trying to find a way out of the black clouds that rained sleet and snow and icy hail down on her, stinging her wings and coat, striking her face and neck. She ducked and dodged and plummeted, but nothing helped. She was stuck in the storm. Lightning flashed around her and illuminated the ominous and dangerous--perhaps deadly--shapes of the billowing clouds around her, all of them black bleached silver by the flash of lightning that gave her a half a second of sight before she went blind again. “Help me!” Derpy screamed, though she knew that nobody would hear her. Folding in her wings, she dove down toward the earth, racing the rain and going perhaps fast enough to create a sonic rainboom were there sun to make a rainbow. There were lights on the ground below her. Were they somehow prolonged reflections of the lightning? Was it the snow? A fire? Ponyville? Where was she? At that moment, a sudden and violent gust of wind snatched her in a freezing and insubstantial fist, rolling her head over heels and around and around and around like she was a wooden block in a dryer. She was shaken and joggled and tossed around for so long that she lost all sense of direction and didn’t know if she were falling or being hurled up toward the heavens. The dark clouds above her whirled and she closed her eyes tightly and shook her head, trying to regain control, but her wings were pinned to her sides. At last, she realized that she was falling. She fainted just before she crashed through the roof of the palace in Canterlot.
You okay?Derpy stirred, and a torrent of whispers met her ears. “She’s not dead!” “What’s she doing here?” “Some entrance, right? She’d do anything for attention!” Then, a new voice, pleasantly between high and very deep, spoke up above the rest. “Quiet! Is all you can think about this poor pony’s faults when she just crashed through the roof, obviously blown in by the storm?” There was a faint buzzing, more mechanical than bees, and a blue light shone on Derpy’s closed eyes. “Come on,” the voice coaxed, quiet enough so that only she could hear it. Some pony was lightly stroking her forelock with his muzzle. “Come on, beautiful, let’s see those eyes.” “No!” Derpy whispered, fierce although it was faint. “Spirited, huh?” The new pony chuckled softly. “That’s what I like to see. Now come on, show me your pretty eyes.” Her golden, wandering eyes had never been described as pretty, and she was hesitant to obey, but there was something, just something, about that voice that made her choose to trust the speaker. Timidly, she blinked and lifted her head. “There we go!” The pony grinned. He was almost ridiculously handsome, with a light brown coat, like pale brown sugar, and that sugar-pelt was shining and glossy beneath the bright, multicolored lights. His mane was scruffy and the rich dark brown of chocolate. His forelock fell onto his forehead with careless and casual elegance, and his matching tail hung to his hocks. His eyes sparkled at her like cobalt blue gemstones, sweet and gentle like a midnight breeze. He leaned down and kindly helped her rise to her shaky feet. “D-did I hurt anybody?” Derpy asked, her ears drooping and her head lowering. “No, but you certainly ruined the party!” Rainbow Dash snapped. “The Wonderbolts and I were about to make our grand entrance!” “That’s enough!” The new pony said sharply, his ears flattening in anger. “Do you even care that she could have been seriously hurt? Is all you can think about your spoiled entrance when she might have died?” Rainbow Dash dropped her head and stared sulkily at the ground. “Now then,” said the colt, turning on Derpy. Uh oh! Now I’m really gonna catch it! Derpy thought, shrinking backward, her stomach churning like Pinkie Pie’s blender were whirling away on full blast. After all, what else could he do but shout at her? She immediately recognized him as the colt in whose honor the part was for, and she had just wrecked it by coming in through the roof when she wasn’t even in the register! She had broken the castle, and she could even see Princess Celestia staring at her in shock. She hung her head, her cheeks red with shame. He leaned close to her and whispered, “Would you like to come back to my place after this kerfuffle is over?” Derpy stared at him in shock and a bit of revulsion, but he said, “No, no, it’s nothing like that. You just look like you could use some fixing up.” Derpy followed his gaze to the scratches and little cuts all over her body and wings, then nodded shyly. “Fantastic!” He said, then turned and raised his head to look at Princess Celestia. “I’m very sorry about all this, Majesty,” he said. She blinked, then smiled. “It’s all right, Doctor. Is our young friend okay?” This ‘Doctor’ looked at Derpy, who nodded again. Swishing her tail in embarrassment, she said, “I gotta go...I’m not allowed in here.” “Why?” The Doctor pony asked. “Some pony made a mistake and I’m not in the register,” she mumbled, backing away further. “That’s ridiculous!” The Doctor exclaimed. Stepping close to her, he said, “You can stay here as my guest.” Derpy’s eyes began to shine and she positively glowed with happiness. “R-really?” The Doctor winked at her. “Sure.” After the party had left, Derpy stood quietly in the corner while the Doctor chatted pleasantly with Princess Celestia, thanking her for the party and wishing her well. Derpy smiled as the handsome colt walked over to her, then took off his coat and draped it around her shoulders. “Don’t want a pretty filly like you getting a cold, do we?” Derpy blushed brightly, her cheeks turning rosebud pink, and she didn’t say anything. Derpy, although no pony would believe it, was actually very skilled at reading body language, and there was nothing about the Doctor that suggested that he was being anything but kind. Sure, his doting was a wee bit flirtatious, but he didn’t do it because he wanted her, or anything like that. He was just a genuinely kind soul who knew just how to help. He kept close to her side as the two walked through the snow, walked because, unlike Derpy, the Doctor did not have wings. “So,” Derpy said shyly, the crunching of snow filling the night as she walked next to him, “Do you have a name besides Doctor?” He glanced at her out of the corner of his shimmering cobalt eye. “It’s just Doctor.” Derpy nodded. She understood perfectly. He probably had an awkward name like Shiny Sand, judging from his hourglass Cutie Mark. Well, she had no right to judge; after all, her name was Derpy. “I’m Derpy, by the way.” Oh, please, don’t laugh at my name! “Derpy?” The Doctor asked, a smile spreading over his face. His eyes twinkled with barely suppressed laughter. She stared at the ground, her face hot and her stomach squirming with embarrassment. The Doctor finally had to laugh, and he nudged her shoulder playfully. “That’s the cutest name I’ve ever heard!” Derpy’s head jerked up and she actually stopped walking, just staring at him in shock. “Really?” She squeaked. He grinned at her. “Really.” Lifting his head higher, he looked around and said, “Come on. It’s not far from here.” “So you’ve saved Ponyville before?” Derpy asked, loving the warmth of his coat around her shoulders. “Yeah,” the Doctor said offhandedly, and from his tone he wasn’t bragging. “Do….do you remember a black Pegasus mare with a gold mane and tail?” Derpy whispered shyly, feeling a tremor of excitement and nervousness rushing up through her like a waterfall breaking free from winter’s ice. “She had ballet shoes as her Cutie Mark?” The Doctor lifted his head to the sky and closed his eyes as he walked, the soft white snow dusting his mane and face like little flakes of sugar. “Yes, I remember her. Mist Chaser, correct?” Derpy squealed and the Doctor jumped, startled. “What’d you do that for?” “That was my mother! She was pregnant with me when you saved her and then that means that it’s because of you that I’m alive and thank you!” Her words came out in a tumble as she tackled him in a hug. They crashed into the snow and sent up a plumy spray, like that of waves breaking over rocks. Derpy realized what she had done, then jumped up with a frantic apology. “I’m sorry! So so so sorry! I didn’t mean to do that, I just didn’t think and--” The Doctor slowly got to his feet and Derpy was terrified that she had hurt him. But then he grinned at her. “You’re welcome. My place is just ahead.” He led Derpy onward through the falling snow to where the silhouette of a tall, curious blue box awaited them. Derpy looked at the box on all sides, then frowned. “This is a pretty little house, Mr. Doctor,” she said matter-of-factly, trotting around it twice. The Doctor’s voice had a smile in it as he said, “You’ll be surprised.” Derpy looked the strange blue box up and down, up and down, then, swishing her long golden tail to flick away the snowflakes, she trotted after him and went inside.
Opps! My Bad!“DERPY! STOP. TRYING. TO. HELP!” It took an awful lot of mishaps to make even Pinkie Pie lose her temper, but….Derpy hung her head, her creamy blonde forelock falling over her teary golden eyes. “I-I’m sorry, I really am, but…” “You crushed the cake, you burned the cupcakes, you let the ice cream melt, you somehow managed to slop paint all over the couch, you made a hole in my wall when you were trying to put up the banner and accidentally put a nail through your hoof!” “It was an accident,” Derpy protested quietly, trying not to cry. Pinkie Pie went on as if she hadn’t spoken. “I sent you into the kitchen to cook, and it’s a disaster! There’s syrup making the floor all sticky, the utensils are everywhere, the smoke alarm’s gone off four times in twenty minutes, you can’t even read a recipe--” “Pinkie, I--” Derpy tried. She was cut off again. “You somehow managed to dismantle the microwave, and the only food you didn’t burn was the muffins, but even then you forgot the flour!” “My bad,” Derpy whispered sheepishly, her head hanging lower and her tail brushing the ground. “Go help Applejack pick some apples!” Pinkie went on, though she sounded less angry. “She could use a Pegasus, and Rainbow Dash is clearing the sky while Fluttershy is busy with the animals.” Derpy shook out her flour-covered wings, the feathers sticky with drying chocolate syrup, and took off, flapping out the door in a crooked, lopsided way, bonking her head on the top of the door as she went. Applejack was pleased to see her. “Howdy there, pard’ner!” She shouted cheerily. “I need an extra pair of hooves to help with these here apples! Gotta get a bunch for that party today, y’know!” “I’m so excited to see who saved Ponyville before! How come he hasn’t come sooner?” Derpy chirped, getting tangled in the branches and knocking about five apples to the ground. “Me too. But he’s probably busy with some important stuff,” Applejack said, bucking a tree square in the trunk. Apples fell into the bucket with a staccato thumping that sounded like drumbeats. “Ooh! You could make music with the apples!” Derpy cried, a crooked grin spreading over her face. “Let me try!” Before Applejack could say anything, Derpy grabbed the tree in a big bear hug and shook it as hard as she could, the leaves rattling together like microscopic pebbles. The apples certainly came off, but they were quickly covered by a hailstorm of aromatic verdian foliage as every leaf fell off as well. “Oh….sorry!” Derpy cried, trying to dive and pick up an apple and only managing to crash into the ground in a tangle of legs and wings and fluffy blonde hair. Applejack blinked, then smiled. “Don’t worry about it, sugarplum. There’s plenty of other trees.” Trotting over to one, she said, “Now, watch me.” She nailed the tree with a mighty buck, the sound echoing around the whole of Sweet Apple Acres, and like ruby red rain, the sweet fruit came loose and plunked into buckets. “See? Ya gotta kick the tree, not shake it.” “Oh! Okay!” Derpy cried, then bounded over to a giant tree with branches so heavy with apples that they were dragged toward the ground. Lunging forward onto her forelegs, she thrust out her heels in a heavy buck--that completely missed the tree and hit a bucket of freshly collected apples, spilling them all over the ground. “Oops! My bad!” Derpy cried, starting forward to refill the bucket, but Applejack stopped her. “Just go buck down some more apples, sugarcube,” she said patiently. “And don’t worry about it. I’ve kicked over my fair share of buckets, too.” Feeling better because she wasn’t the only one who made such mistakes, Derpy cantered over to another tree. She braced her hind legs up against it and then kicked hard, and this time she didn’t miss the tree. What did miss, however, were all those apples. Not a single one made it into the bucket. Derpy couldn’t seem to do anything right, and finally, after she somehow managed to push a wheelbarrow into a lake, Applejack came up to her and said, “Um, look, Derpy, why don’t you go help Rarity? It can’t be easy with all them dresses, I reckon.” “Okay!” Derpy trilled, pretending to be enthusiastic, but she knew Applejack’s motivation. She just kept getting in the way. Flapping off through Ponyville, Derpy landed on Rarity’s doorstep, tripped, and toppled over. Getting up again and shaking her head and wings, she tapped on the door with one hoof and waited. A flustered-looking Rarity opened the door. There were pins in her mouth and a tape measure wound around one leg. Her luscious purple mane was frizzy and tangled, and her normally flawless makeup job was smudged. She definitely needed some help, all right. “Oh! Um, Derpy, hello, can I help you? Do you like your dress?” “Oh, I love it!” Derpy beamed. “It’s the most prettiest thing I’ve ever owned!” “Well, I’m certainly glad,” Rarity said with a strained smile. “But if you’ll excuse me, I really have no time to spare….” “Applejack sent me to help you!” Derpy told her, eyes sparkling. “She...she did?” Why? She knows that Derpy is the clumsiest pony for miles! I can’t have her in here! She’d ruin everything! “Well, I’m almost done with the last dress, so…..why don’t you go find Twilight or Rainbow Dash or Fluttershy? I’m sure they’re more in need of help than I am.” Rarity gave an airy laugh and closed the door quickly. Derpy’s ears drooped as she walked slowly away. She had seen the inside of the shop. Half-cut dresses, dresses that needed to be hemmed, fabric to fold, ribbons to tie...the place was an absolute catastrophe….Rarity may need her help, but she wouldn’t accept it. Rainbow Dash was flying around, looping the loop and doing barrel rolls, spinning through loops in the clouds and creating a red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple blur in the cerulean backdrop of the endless sky. Derpy watched, wide-eyed, as the blue Pegasus bucked, slammed, and whammied the clouds right out of the sky, sending them in every direction like beautiful white balls of fluffy. Derpy stretched out her wings and jumped up into the air. “Hi, Rainbow Dash!” Rainbow Dash looked down. “Hi, Derpy.” “Rarity sent me to help you clear the sky!” Derpy stated, and if it were possible for somebody to bounce up and down in midair, she was doing exactly that. Rainbow Dash looked around at all the clouds. “I could clear this sky in twenty seconds,” she bragged, “but sure, you can come up here.” Derpy flew a lopsided loop-the-loop and kicked her forelegs in excitement. “Oh boy!” She rocketed off, then whirled in the air and bucked a heavy cloud. Unfortunately, it didn’t explode harmlessly like the others did. A lightning bolt shot out and hit Derpy, sending her cartwheeling head over heels, making her mane frizz out even worse than Rarity’s and making her tail look like an electrified hedgehog. “Woo! That was some shock, huh Rainbow Dash?” Rainbow Dash closed her eyes. “Just get on with it, Derpy.” “Okey-dokey!” Derpy flew back in for another go, and another bolt shot out, this time shooting right between Rainbow Dash’s ears. “Yikes! Careful, Derpy! Watch it!” “Sorry!” Derpy flapped awkwardly over to her. “Can you show me how you do it?” “Watch the master at work!” Rainbow Dash grinned smugly, then soared off, slamming her hind feet into a cloud with somewhat unnecessary ferocity. Derpy tried to copy her, but the cloud just burst into five littler ones. “Jeez, Derpy! Haven’t you ever cleared a sky before?” “I just don’t know what went wrong!” Derpy chirped, bouncing up and down in midflight. “And no pony’s ever let me clear the sky before!” “Gee, I wonder why,” Rainbow Dash muttered. “I’m so excited to see the new colt!” Derpy cried, flipping onto her back and flying at another cloud. “Is it true he’s really saved Ponyville before?” “Yes,” Rainbow Dash answered, seeming exasperated. “It was way before any of us were born, when the mayor was just a filly herself.” “The mayor told me he saved my mother when she was gonna have me!” Derpy beamed, accidentally electrocuting herself again. Rainbow Dash chose not to say the smart remark that she was thinking at the moment. Instead, she said, “Derpy, you keep zapping yourself, and I don’t really need your help anyway. Go help Fluttershy instead!” Derpy stopped bouncing up and down on top of a raincloud. “But…..” “Go!” Rainbow Dash ordered. “Go help her round up a bunch of rabbits or catch some birds or something.” Derpy stared at the ground, far, far below, as she slowly flew away, rejected yet again. Author's Note First Chapter so far! I have more to come!
