luke comes to equestria

by Prince Luna

Rating: everyone
Tags: Human, Main 6, Princess Luna, Opalescence, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Original Character, Comedy, Random, Slice of Life
Length: 4244

Trollfic, a self-insert spoof.

Watch the dramatic reading of the first 3 chapters here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0g0VUDibfss it's hillarious XD
luke comes to equertia and he is the most powerfulest alikorn ever so he uses his magic and does good things 4 the place but he leaves momentarily and chaos happens he needs to CTRL+S the day. (Not to be taken seriously AT ALL. Any bad spelling or grammar is intentional. A spoof of poorly made self-inserts. For now this is a one-shot I did when I was bored. There may or may not be another part, I just want to do my crossovers now.)

Published 2012-03-20 03:14:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-05-19 15:37:53 UTC

the knew arival

luke woke up and gasped.
"im in equestria" he said loudly.
he looked and saw he had a horn and a wings. he was a alicorn. he was dark blue with a black mane and his cutie mark was a star.
"i wonder y im here" he thought.
somepony came to him it was twilight sparkle.
"hello! oh a alicorn we need to take you to princes celestia" twilight sparkle demanded!
"k" said luke who smiled.
***
a few hours l8r they were in canterlot.
"oh wow its much beter than in the cartoon!" luke said.
"what cartoon!" twilight asked.
"nothing" luke said keeping the secret.
they saw celestia and luna luna blushed cos she fancied luke.
"so this is the alicorn" celestia said
"yes" said twilight
"k i need to no how he got here" she said
"dunno" luke and twilight said.
"hi luna" luke said.
she waved and said hi back.
"whats youre name!" asked twilight cos she fancied luke.
"im luke" said luke whos name was luke.
"k you can live in ponyville" said celestia.
"cool!" luke exclai- exlame- said.
***
luke met rainbow dash and she showed him a sonic rainbowm.
"wow that was cool" he said
"yes i no so are you" said rainbow dash cos she fancied luke.
she then did a loop the loop and went back to cloudsdale. rarity walked up with opelesense.
"oh this is luke" she said
"meow" said opalesince cos she fancied luke
"want a outfit!" asked rairty.
"k i wont a black tux" luke said.
"k ill make it now" rarity said cos she fancied luke "come on opelesunse."
"meow" said opulesence.
luke thought he was popular with the girls and he saw big mac.
"eyup" said big mac then he saw luke "hello my name is big mac how can i help u?" he asked
"dunno im just walking" said luke
"k ill keep going by the way this is my sister apples bloom" he said and walked away
"how get him to talk!" said apples bloom
"im a alicorn" said luke
"yes" said apples bloom
then he aimed his horn at apples blooms flank and used magic
"wow my cutie mark came" apples bloom shouted.
"yes it is a picture of me" luke said
"wow i need to show sweet bell and soot-a-loo!" apples bloom ran away and liked her new cutie mark cos she fancied luke.
***
luke went back to canterlot and saw luna
"hello" he said
"hello" she said
"i love you" he said
she said she loved him too and they had a wedding and got married at the wedding cos she fancied luke like i said. all the girl ponies cryed cos they fancied luke even big mac fancyed him he was gay. ohpalesence scrached luna because she was jealous.
then they were going back to lukes house if you know what i mean but pinkie pie stopped them.
"luke i brought you here" she said
"why" asked luke
"dunno i just brought you here" she said
"can i go back!" luke quest- kwesch- asked.
"ye" said pinkie pie
"ok by luna im going home" said luke
"cya" said luna to her new husband
so luke went home but he was still an alicorn and there was a portal behind him.
"hm maybe i should go back" he thought.
so he jumped in the portal and went back!
***
he looked around everything was random the floor was dominos and there was a chicken in the sky.
"o its just scoot-a-loo flying hi" he said she said hi.
he went to his house and opened the door but his house wasent there! luna was sat on the floor.
"hi your back" said luna huging luke cos she was married to him.
"yes i am what happen!" he shouted.
"diskord is back again and he wants to make chaos again to rule the world again!" luna expl-ekspl- said.
"oh no not again" luke said.
so luke and luna went to canterlot to get the elements of harmony but there was a giant opelassence!
"MEOW" it screamed still jealous.
luke used his magic and turned opelisense back to normal.
"k cya sorry for marying luke but i fancy him" said luna.
"hi my names mike. im a cat!" opalessenc-no sorry mike said.
"oh no diskord got to raritys cat!" luke said.
"cause my name is dave oh my name is dave..." mike/dave sang.
"not a song!" they ran.
celestia opened the door to the elements and luke wore all the necklaces.
"you are the most powerful alicorn so you can kill him for good." celestia said kissing luke on the cheek cos she fancied him.
"i will stay here" said luna as she made out with luke.
"k cya im gonna kill diskord." luke ran off.
"by" the two said.
***
"hey diskord" luke said.
the creature turned around.
"hello! oh youre the alicorn sent to get rid of me well ill kill you first" diskord zapped luke.
luke was dying but he heard voices.
"dont be die luke we need u!" said twilight.
"howdy we spent so much time together yall cant just leave us yeehaw" said applejack, she was a texan.
"your my cutie mark!" said apples bloom.
"eyup" said big mac.
"i can do it!" luke glowed.
he rose up in light and ate the elemtns he then super evoled to mega-luke!
"hey diskord!" he said.
"yes?" diskord turned around.
"&%$* YOU!" he shouted and blasted magic at diskord.
"noo" diskord died.
***
luke was at his ceremony and so was the others.
"its like the prophercy!" whispered fluttershy cos she fancied luke.
"well done you did a good job killing diskord" said celestia.
"yes you saved us" said luna
"k thanks" said luke.
"ill send you home now" said pinkie pie.
"k i love you rainbow dash" luke said kissing his gf.
***
luke was home but still a alicorn!! he then saw the portal again.
"maybe its my destiny" said luke and he walked in again.

~~~THE END~~~ :-)

luke comes back 2 equestria,

hi guys soz its been so long but i deci- desey- chose to rite a sequal! i no its been ages since th last chapter but o well here we go!
-----~~~~~~~******------~~~~~~********:):):):):)-----~~~~

luke was lisning to his ipod he was lisning to his favorite song high schol never ends he licked the pmv of it and was showing the music to his fionsay applejack, she was a texan.
"howdy i like this music yeehaw" said applejack, she was a texan.
"yes" said luke
its been 4 months since luke went back in the portal nd he saw his wif luna again and everypony was happy so happy i could cry! soz give me a sec i need to stop crying
ok so applejack (the texan) went in the cafe they where at and went to get more cofee but celestia came to luke
"we need u in canterlot again" she said
"but im having lunch with applejack (the texan)" luke said but not the texan bit i put that cos applejack is a texan just incase u didnt no.
so luke flyed to canterlot to see the problem it was opalassscents in the tree so luke used his magic to save her.
"thanks" said mike
"k" said luke
so luke had saved mike/opalisanse and went back home (pardon the pun)
***
"soz applejack (the texan) i had to get a cat from the tree in canterlot" luke said
"howdy its ok yall need to do youre duty yeehaw" said applejack, she was a texan.
he was watching mlp:fim s1e3 on his phone and twilight sparkle came u pto him
"whats that!" she asked
"its nothing its a phone" luke said
"o i dunno wot that is" said twilight
"k well im going home by applejack (the texan) by twilight" he said kissing his gf twilight.
he went home to see his wife luna
"hi luke" she said
"hi babez" he said back "well i got to now"
so luke flyed to twilights house next door and opend the door
"hi spike" luke said to the pruple dragon.
"hi luke wow can you show me magic again?" spike asked..
"hi yes i will what do you want" luke asked
"number 36 please" so luke aimed his horn at spike and he became BIG MUSCLES! and went to raritys house to be in love with her.
***
so luke and spike went to raritys but she wasent there!!
"o no someone kidnapt her!" said spike
"the worst things that can happen this is THE WORST POSIBLE THING!" luke yeld.
"yes i no" said spike with his big muscles
they saw opelisanse/mike/dave and asked where was to be rarity
"cos my name is dave oh my name is dave" the cat sang
"not the song!" luke said runing away with spike.
***
so luke gathered the main six except rairty cos she was missing and fluttershy cos she was feeding her rabbit.
"k we gota find rarity" luke said "i tryed using my magic but she came here and then went again cos i magicked wrong"
"ok where is she" rainbow dash asked
"missing" luke said
everypony gasped! if lukes magic didnt work thenit must be bad!
***
they went to the forest and battled a manticorn but fluttershy needed to take the thorn out of its poor again and she did so they went on.
"wow its like when we went to fight nitemare moon" said rarity pinkie pie
"yes i think well see steven magnet" said tiwlight
but they didnt! so they crossed the river and the bridge and went to where they found the elements of harmony
"oh i forgot" said luke who flyed to canterrlot and came back "i need the elements cos ther might be a evil guy"
he wore them cos he was the most powerful alicorn. then they went upstairs and saw NITEMARE MOON!
"what r u doing here!" asked rainbow dash
"kidnaping rarity" said nitemare moon
"k your not alowed" said luke
"o its the alicorn" said nitemare moon
"howdy aint you luna yeehaw" said applejack, she was a texan.
"no cos im a new one" said nitemare moon
"ok hows luna" said luke
"shes k shes in the bed" she said
"oh thats k" luke said reayd to kill nitemare moon
"ON YOUR SIDE!" she laughed
"oh it is on" said luke and used his mgic to kill her but it didnt killed her!
"you cant kill me cos im invisible" said nitemare moon
"if shes invisible we cant kill her" said twilight
"she must be invisible!" said pinkie pie
remember fluttershy wasent there well she followed them actually thats y she took the thron out but they werent looking and didnt see her so she went to nitemare moon
"no we dont do this its bad give rarity back"
"k soz :(" said nitemare moon who untied rairty
"im back guys" said rarity
"what do we do with nitemare moon!" asked spike showing off his muscles to rarity btu the magic went away!
"i still need to kill her shes evil" luke said
"but im good now fluttershy turned me good" she said in her dafence
"ill still kill you" said luke and blastred her with magic she screamed and died.
they decided to go home (again sorry pardon the pun)
***
"luke for yor heroics we can give you this medal" celestia gave luke the medal
"thank you" he said kissing his gf celestia and waved to his wife luna in the crowd
"im proud to accept this" he anno-anow- said.
applejack (the texan) cried she was very happy of her bf getting a award.
luke stood on an podium
"i will bring piece to equestria" and everyone cheered cos they all fancied him.
so luke lived in equestria forever but what happened in the real world! find out next time on LUKE COMES TO EQUESTRIA!

luke goes back and comes back part 1/2

today luke was with his wife luna and his gf flutershy came in
"oh hello luke" she said
"hi" said luke
"i just came" she said "to say that my rabbit ran away can u get it"
"yes" luke said so he went to find the rabbit.
he found it outside his house
"silly fluttershy" he said "the rabbit was outside"
"i know" said fluttershy "cya"
"potassium" said luke (i started doing science thought id put a joke from science in LOL)
***
luke was doing the garden then spike came to say hello
"hello" said spike
"hi said luke
"lets go and see rairty" said spike cos he fancied luke but he fancied rarity coz he was bisexual (CREDIT TO OWEN KAY 11SS/GS (I FORGOT) TM 2012)
so they went to raritys house
"hi" said rarity she was not kidnapt
"hi" said luke "i have to go now cya"
"by" said everyone
***
luke was crying cos he missed the real world but he was also crying because his gf rainbow dash dumpt him his wife luna was cons-kons-comfo-kumfur-making him feel better.
"its k theres other fish in the carbon" said luna (another science joke)
"thanks luna" he said kissing his wife
so luke decided he wanted to go back to the real world he went to pinkie pie but she dunno how to get him back
"but u did it b4" luke said
"yeah i dunno how" said pinkie pie cos she fancied luke
"&!?"£ logic im pinkie pie" laughed luke
"what did you say!" asked pinkie pie
"nothing" luke fogot he wasent allowed to swear cos it was a kids show.
"so can i go back!" luke asked
"yes ill get the portal ready" said pinkie and she got the portal
***
it was weird in the real world cos luke was an human again and he walked and saw his mum
"hi mum" he said
"hi" she said
"did u miss me!" he asked
"dunno where were u" she said
"oh wasent i gone" luke asked
"no" she said
"k" luke said and went back to equestria
BUT HE WAS A PERSON IN EQUESTRIA!!!!!!!!
to be continued...!

The Final Story: Part 1

Luke fell to the ground in pure astonishment. Not only was he the one who would ultimately defeat a deep lurking evil, he was also this deep lurking evil. He tried to stand up again but his tembling knees caused him to collapse once more. The ponies tried to keep their distance.

"luke wot is this y r u gonna kill us!" asked spike

Luke had to think to himself for a moment. He said nothing. He managed to stand up at last and kicked some of the sand from the desert, then turned to the ponies.

"i dunno" he said.

Then, a blinding light filled the skies and a mighty figure flew down to the ground before Luke. It was Princess Celestia. She turned to the ponies and focused her horn on them. Using her magic, she transported them back to Ponyville.

"luke u gota exercise the demon in u" she said.

"wot demon?" luke asked

Celestia then told Luke how it was not truly him that was evil, but a spirit living inside of him. How it got there exactly, neither of them knew.

"y did u send the others back" luke asked

"they think ur evil nd we cant let them stop u release the evil in u" she said back.

Celestia then sighed and used her magic to levitate the letter which Spike had dropped when he teleported.

"theres someting i miscal- misskal- did wrong" she said

"wot!" said luke

"u r not the chrono core x aka The Purification Weapon" she expl- ekspl- said.

Luke learned that 'The Purification Weapon' was the true name of the 'chrono core x', and that it was not him, but truly a weapon of mass power.

"wen i gave the elemtns of harmony a new form i used there power to mak the weapon" she said "this weapon wood destroy an evil i predickted years ago"

"do i has to killed myself!" luke shouted a question

"dunno" celestia replyed.

Luke looked towards the sun and shielded his eyes from its glaring light.

"were is The Purification Weapon?" he asked

"in the castle in canterlot" celestia said "but u cant just go in not even with my permishun you need to go to the grand galloping gala"

She explained to Luke a detailed plan of how he would arrive to the Gala and whilst there, make his way to Celestia and recieve a map of the grounds and magic spells to use on the guards. Apparently this was all too important and risky for Celestia to do herself, she could not just simply retrieve The Purification Weapon. It had magical shields that only Luke, the most powerful being in Equestria, could overcome.

"but i ent a alicorn anymore im a human" he said

"i can use a spell to change you back" said celestia and she did and teleported them back to ponyville but luke was under diskies.

***

Later that night, Luke remembered something very important from his first visit to Ponyville. He went to his room in his house and looked through his wardrobe.

"lol found it" he smiled looking at the tux rarity made him in chapter 1.

Struggling to put it on with horse-like features, it took him a long time to correctly wear the tuxedo, but he managed to put it on correctly eventually. He walked outside into the cold night air to wait for his carriage to the Gala. Ponies walked by but none recognised him; it seemed that Celestia's disguise spell was working well.

Eventually, a cart pulled by two white stallions stopped at Luke's door and he climbed on board and suddenly gasped at who he saw.

"luna wot u doin here?" he asked.

"im ur date 2 the gala" she giggled.

"k" said luke and they went to the gala.

***

After an hour or so, the two arrived at Canterlot Castle and waited for the doors to open. They watched in awe as the Wonderbolts performed amazing somersaults and tricks to open the Gala.

"rainbow dash wonts to be them" luke said

"yeah i no but they wont let her" said luna

"y!" asked luke

"we cold all die soon" she said with a tear.

Luke had to ponder for a second as to what exactly she meant, but he decided to ignore it and focus on his main mission; to retrieve The Purification Weapon. At last the gates opened and ponies flooded in, all wearing dresses and suits to mark the occasion. Luke and Luna trotted through slowly and immediatley found a room where they would be safe and nopony would find them.

"k now i need to make u seethru" said luna using magic on luke and he was gone.

"thanks" luke said "now i need to find The Purification Weapon"

Luke quickly galloped off, however Luna was not sure which direction he went as her spell had turned him invisible. Carefully avoiding bumping into ponies when entering huge crowds, Luke had to find his way to the basement of the castle before Luna's spell wore off.

Luke stealthily opened another door when nopony was watching. The door led to a small cloakroom with a hatch in the floor, which Luke opened with his magic. He stepped through, expecting stairs, but fell and landed on the ground with a hard thud and the invisiblity spell wore off.

"oops" he said.

He identified this as the basement and directly ahead of him was a large opaque white case attached to the cold, mossy stone wall.

"fond it" luke smiled.

He slowly approached the case and reached his hoof out to open it, but as he did so, a crackle of electricity made contact with his hoof and exploded in the air, sending him flying backwards into another wall.

"ouch that was mean" he grumbuld.

"indeed" said another voice

"o celestia hi" said luke to the alicorn

Celestia had entered the basement just as Luke tried to open the case. She laughed.

"luke thow needeth to use thine spelleth i taght thow" she sed

"o i forgot!" he said

Luke closed his eyes and relaxed. His horn began to glow a blue aura circled his horn and also on the case. It shone brightly in the blue colour and slowly opened to reveal another orb of light which flew out anfd covered Luke. Luke, in the light, levitated upwards. Celestia watched in amazement as the light faded, still leaving Luke in midair, and slowly transformed into a bright silver armor which slivered up Luke's hooves and twisted around his torse then up his neck and over the top of his head. Around his neck, a light green gem formed and was supported by more silver armor.

Then Celestia began to laugh maniacally and out of her usual context.

"r u ok" asked lukee lowering down

"im more than okayeth, foal!" she replyed evily
"what did u call me!" luke gasped

"a foal ur a foal im not celestia and now u opened the case witch previously sealed my power" she expl-eks-sorry this bit is too scary i cant spell very well my heart is racing.

"then who are you!" luke asked

'Celestia' laughed once more and walked over to the open case. Its white leather turned a dark black and a purple mist oozed out. A green light slowly travelled from Celestia's hooves, which turned black and had holes in them. Eventually she was fully transformed and revealed herself.

"i am queen crystalist" she said

"i dunno who u r but y r u here!" luke asked

"to get my powers back!" she announced

Then the purple mist lowered to the ground and grew, taking the form of a smaller creature. A changeling.

"wot r those" luke asked scarededly.

"my changeling army they can transform into anything or anyone" chrystalist laughed.

Luke watched in horror as more and more changelings formed from the purple mist. He then tensed himself and looked down at the gem on his chest.

"The Purification Weapon" he gasped.

"no dont use it itll kill me!" chrystalist begged

"good! PURIFICATION WEAPON ACTIVATE!" luke shouted.

The gem shone a bright green. Chrysalis covered her eyed and screamed. The Purification Weapon was in effect.

"a one time use to end the evil" luke grined.

The light then started to take a shape. The shape of an alicorn. Luke gasped as it became real and Chrysalis stared seeing she was in no danger. The alicorn stood on the floor. She was a glorious white with long flowing green hair. She wore a golden wreath around her head and had an expression so serious that it would give anypony goosebumps. She was no taller than Luke or Twilight Sparkle, but just as magnificent.

"who r u" luke asked in amazment.

"I am MUTTV," she proclaimed, "or as you may know me, The Purification Weapon."

the end (april foals chapter!!!! not a cannon)

luke killed himself but he wos a nuke nd every1 died

THE (real) END!!!!!!!!!

april foals (horse joke get it!)

luke goes back and comes back part 2/2; the chrono core X

BUT HE WAS AN HUMAN!

luke looked around and saw everypony staring at him

"who are you!" asked lyra, who cos she fancied luke but as a pony not an human

"its me luke" said luke who really was luke

but nopony beleved him :( and the equestria police arrested him

"you need a audience with the princes" they said

"k" luke cryed

he saw her but she new it was him!

"luke" she said

"hello" he replied

"we need to change you to a alicorn again we need to find the chrono core X" her voice boomed

"what why" luke asked

"it is the ultimat power and there is a new bad guy who turned you back to a person" she expl-eksp-said.

"k where is it" luke said

"i dunno i used it years ago but its lost" she said

"k do i need to go on a journey!" luke beemed.

"yes" celestia said

***

luke got the main characters of mlpfim and remembered s1e2 where they adventured but he knowed thy needed to go far so they went to the dessert

"whats a human again!" asked rarity

"its like a pony but different in lots of ways" luke expl-ekspl- i really dont like that word :(

"howdy do ya'll no where the chrono core x is yeehaw" applejack asked, she was a texan.

"no" said luke

"then where are we going!" luna, lukes wife, asked

"wherever our feet and whoves take us" luke said

"k" everypony said (howdy k yeehaw applejack said, she was a texan.)

suddenly spike BURRRRRRRPED a nd there was an scroll

"its from the princes it says that luke you are the chrono core x!" he read

"then whos the villain"

"YOU TWOO!"

luke fell over "oh no"

find out what happens in the VERY LAST EVER CHAPTER next! will luke kill himself or live to doom equestria 4ever!

editers not: there will be a very special difrance to the next chapter i bet 0 people will guess what it is!