Big Macintosh's Storyby MajorDudeChaptersChapter 1Chapter 2Chapter 3Chapter 4Chapter 5Chapter 1Sweet Apple Acres It was a beautiful morning. Celestia's sun started to rise and shine upon a certain house next to an apple farm. The morning silence was broken by a gentle yawning of an adult stallion. The stallion got off of his cozy bed, exposing a large green apple Cutie Mark on his large flank. Letting out another yawn, he walked up to a window. Letting out a smile, the red-skinned Earth pony happily muttered, "Eeyup." He ruffled up his yellow mane as he stared at the sun. "Such a beautiful day." He thought to himself. The weather was perfect too. All thanks to Rainbow Dash, who even made it to the Wonderbolts. "This really is a good life..." The red pony muttered with a grin. He lifted his nose and started sniffing. He smiled. His sister, Applejack, did make the best pancakes out of anypony is Equestria. He walked out of his bedroom and into the kitchen. A yellow filly, with a red bow on her head, smiled and walked up to the red pony. "Morning big brother!" She greeted as she hugged him. The red pony hugged back the filly. "Morning AppleBloom." An orange pony smiled as she put down a plate of piping hot pancakes with extra syrup. "Lovely day, isn't it Big Macintosh?" Big Macintosh nodded. "Indeed it is Applejack." He walked up to an elder green mare and gave her a small kiss on her forehead. "Morning Granny Smith." The green pony smiled. "Good morning Mac." Big Macintosh sat down and started to eat his pancakes. "Lovely breakfast Applejack." Big Macintosh gratefully said to his sister. Applejack laughed. "I cooks them just the way ya like them." After he finished breakfast, Big Macintosh went outside to do his work. With a harness on his back, he walked up to an apple tree and put baskets near it. He gave the tree a good kick and smiled as the apples from the tree fell into the basket. Big Macintosh observed all the other trees he had to harvest from. He let out a smile. "I still have time to visit Rarity." Rarity was Big Macintosh's marefriend. Big Macintosh couldn't wait until she becomes his wife. Nopony minded their relationship. Even Spike, who once had a major crush on Rarity. However, she was too old for him...and then Spike realized that Silver Spoon, one of the well-known bullies, had a crush on him. Now they became inseparable and madly in love. They even made Diamond Tiara, a bully even worse than Silver Spoon, turn over a new leaf. Two well known bullies now became one of the most respected and kind ponies in Ponyville. Big Macintosh grinned. This was the best life he had ever experienced. He walked up to another tree and kicked it. As the apples from the tree fell into the basket, he turned his head to the Everfree Forest. His smile suddenly vanished. "Big Mac!" "Poppa!" As Big Macintosh let out a small tear, Applejack suddenly appeared next to him. "Everything OK Big Macintosh?" Applejack asked her brother with a concerned face. Big Macintosh winced. "Whoa. Ya snuck up on me like that." Applejack frowned. "Sorry." Big Macintosh shook his head. "Don't apologize. Oh. And everything's OK." Applejack smiled and walked away. "Alrighty then." She said. "I still can't believe that she just snuck up on me like THAT." Big Macintosh muttered to himself. He shrugged. "I should probably get to work. Don't want to keep Rarity Belle waiting." He continued his work until it was past noon. He walked over to Carousel Boutique and knocked on the door. A small filly unicorn opened the door and smiled as she saw Big Macintosh. "Hi there Big Macintosh!" The filly shouted as she hugged Big Macintosh "Howdy Sweetie Belle." Big Macintosh said with a chuckle. The filly, Sweetie Belle, shouted, "Rarity! Big Macintosh's here!" A white unicorn appeared and smiled. "Hi there Big Macintosh." She said as she gave him a kiss on his cheek. He smiled and nuzzled her. "Howdy sugar." Sweetie Belle let out a da'www as she saw her older sister be with the stallion she loved. Rarity and Big Macintosh went out to a fancy restaurant that Rarity knew. The dinner was fantastic. Rarity ordered a fancy salad. and, of course, Big Mac did the usual, "I'll have what the lady's having," which made Rarity blush even more. After dinner (and of course a fancy apple pie for desert) Big Macintosh escorted Rarity back to her home. As they reached Carousel Boutique, Rarity gave Big Macintosh a big kiss on his lips. "Good night." Rarity said. "I love you." "I love ya too." Big Macintosh said with a big smile. As he walked home, he walked past the Everfree Forest. He gritted his teeth. "Ah don't know son...it looks pretty dark..." "Please Poppa! Just a bit more!" "But...(sigh)...alright..." "Son! Where are you!" "Big Mac!" "Poppa!" "NO!" Big Macintosh shook his head, wiping the tears from his face. "I'm sorry dad..." He whispered. "No. Ah promised that I wouldn't cry." Big Macintosh said as he sniffed. He walked back to his home. "It's getting dark. I should probably go to sleep right now..." He opened the door and noticed that the house was quiet. Everypony must be asleep. He walked into his room. "I can't wait for the biggest sleep...huh?" Big Macintosh noticed a small rip on the floor. He saw words and numbers and something called, "The Official MLP FanFiction Website." "What the..." Big Macintosh said with a raised eyebrow. "Big Macintosh?" Big Macintosh turned around and saw a tired AppleBloom. He looked back in the floor and, to his surprise, noticed that the rip was gone. Big Macintosh blinked. What happened to that rip? "What happened?" AppleBloom asked. Not wanting to worry AppleBloom, he smiled and patted her head. "Nothing AppleBloom. You should probably go to sleep. Heard ya got a date with Spike." AppleBloom yawned and smiled. "Alrighty. Oh, and it's a double date. Me and Spike are having lunch with Sweetie Belle and Button Mash." She said as she walked back to her room. Big Macintosh yawned. "Good for you AppleBloom." He lied down in his bed and dozed off. Tomorrow was gonna be a good day. Alright. Who the hell was suppose to fix that rip? It was me sir. Call the fire department, because your ass is fired. Chapter 2The next day It was a beautiful morning. Celestia's sun started to rise and shine upon the Apple house. The morning silence was broken by a gentle yawning of Big Macintosh. The stallion got off of his cozy bed, exposing his large green apple Cutie Mark on his large flank. Letting out another yawn, he walked up to a window. Letting out a smile, the red pony happily muttered, "Eeyup." He ruffled up his yellow mane as he stared at the sun. "Such a beautiful day." He thought to himself. "This really is a good life..." The red pony muttered with a grin. He lifted his nose and started sniffing. He smiled. Applejack did make the best pancakes out of anypony is Equestria. He walked out of his bedroom and into the kitchen. AppleBloom smiled and walked up to the red pony. "Morning big brother!" She greeted as she hugged him. The red pony hugged back the filly. "Morning AppleBloom." Applejack smiled as she put down a plate of piping hot pancakes with extra syrup. "Lovely day, isn't it Big Macintosh?" Big Macintosh nodded. "Indeed it is Applejack." He walked up to Granny Smith and gave her a small kiss on her forehead. "Morning Granny Smith." The green pony smiled. "Good morning Mac." Big Macintosh sat down and started to eat his pancakes. "Lovely breakfast Applejack." Big Macintosh gratefully said to his sister. Applejack laughed. "I cooks them just the way ya like them." After he finished breakfast, Big Macintosh went outside to do his work. With a harness on his back, he walked up to an apple tree and put baskets near it. He gave the tree a good kick and smiled as the apples from the tree fell into the basket. Big Macintosh observed all the other trees he had to harvest from. He let out a smile. "I still have time to visit Rarity." Rarity was Big Macintosh's marefriend. Big Macintosh couldn't wait until she becomes his wife. Nopony minded their relationship. Even Spike, who once had a major crush on Rarity. ~~However, she was too old for him...and then Spike realized that Silver Spoon, one of the well-known bullies, had a crush on him.~~ So that's where that mistake was... However, she was too old for him...and then Spike realized that AppleBloom, Big Macintosh's youngest sister, had a crush on him. There we go. Despite endless insults from Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, two well-known bullies, Spike and AppleBloom became inseparable and madly in love. Crap. Those two rich brats remain evil...ah f*ck it. Big Macintosh blinked. "What was that?" He said to himself. Something happened. He couldn't hear it or see it, he just felt like something happened. It was like that incident last night... "Hey Big Macintosh!" Applejack suddenly appeared next to him. Big Macintosh jumped. "Ya scared me there Applejack." Applejack grinned nervously. "Sorry." Big Macintosh shook his head. "Don't worry about it." Applejack smiled and walked away. "Alrighty then." She said. "Hey sis." "Yeah?" "Is it me...or is this day kinda like the same like yesterday?" Applejack froze. "Um...well..ah..." Change the subject. "I heard that there's gonna be a dance and Spike's taking Silver Spoon." Spike's dating AppleBloom. "I mean AppleBloom!" (Sigh) Big Macintosh looked dumbfounded. "OK..." Applejack let out a stupid smile. "Oh look at the time! It's time for me to...do stuff. Bye," She ran away as Big Macintosh just stood there. "Huh." Eventually, he got his work done and visited Rarity. They sat down on a bench. "Hey Rarity, can I ask ya something?" "Sure. What is it?" Big Macintosh sighed. "It feels like...there's something going on. Something weird." Rarity cringed. "Oh, I'm sure it's nothing...hey, remember when we first met?" Big Macintosh nodded. "Yeah...it was Hearts and Hooves Day...and those Cutie Mark Crusaders thought you needed a date so they..." He stopped. Wasn't it Cheerilee that the Cutie Mark Crusaders wanted? Not Rarity? "Something wrong?" "Oh um...nothing Rarity." Big Macintosh frowned. Cheerilee...wasn't she the one whom he fell for? He sighed. "What the buck is going on?" He whispered. Nighttime came and Rarity was escorted home by Big Macintosh. He went home and went to bed. He sighed. "Something's wrong...and I'm gonna find out..." He muttered as he fell asleep. Um sir... Yes? Is it alright if I...um...point out some mistakes...? What mistakes? Well, it feels rushed, you just fixed a mistake improperly, you entirely ripped off your first chapter for the beginning, and don't get me started with the spaci... Ok ok. By the way, are you the Human Torch? Um...no? Well you must be...because YOU'RE F*CKING FIRED. Oh and be a sport and fire that actress who's playing as Applejack, mmkay? Oh god I'm talking like that Suri...I hate her. Chapter 3The next day It was a beautiful morning. Celestia's sun starte- Let's just skip to the chase. Big Macintosh woke up. "It happened again..." He got off of his bed. OK. AppleBloom, say good morning to your 'brother' and Granny Smith...just...do whatever you do. Big Macintosh quickly turned around. "Who's there?" What do ya mean the new Applejack can't cook?-! Just...make something! I don't care! Big Macintosh twitched his eye. "Somepony's here." AppleBloom! What's taking you so long?-! "WHERE ARE YOU?-!" "Macintosh!" Big Macintosh turned around and saw AppleBloom. "AppleBloom! Did ya hear that..." "No. I didn't hear The Author talking!" AppleBloom said with a shrug. Big Macintosh gave her a glare. "What did ya say...?" He whispered. AppleBloom's ears dropped. "Uh...I...um...ah..." Nice going 'AppleBloom,' you're fired. Somepony knock out Big Mac. "SHOW YOURSELF, WHOEVER YOU ARE!" shouted Big Macintosh. A yellow mare who looked like Applejack came with a chair and hit Big Macintosh in the head, knocking him out. CHAPTER END A human sighed as he put his hand on his forehead. He rocked his chair he was sitting on. He was in a room filled with computers, devices, and his pony staff. There was a large screen in front of the human. "Get the AppleBloom actress." He said blankly. A pony who looked like AppleBloom walked into the room. She let out a nervous look as she stood before the human. "Alright look." The doppelgänger said with a New York accent. "I screwed up, ok? But I promise I..." "I promise you're fired." The human interrupted. The AppleBloom look-alike let out a shocked face before it turned into an angry face. "Alright! The buck with youse! I don't need this crap! There are other fan fictions to star in! I'll be in a good fan fiction! Maybe this one where I meet these other stupid blank flanks in a forest..." She shouted as she walked away. The human rolled his eyes. "A little rough, huh Author?" The human's mare assistant said. "Full name please." "Oh...um...The Author." "Thank ye very much." The human said as he let out a cheerful smile. "Let's see what the readers think!" He took out a remote control and pointed it to the large screen. He pressed a button and the screen turned on. "Let's see...ZAGNA says, 'Get off of this fanfic site.' Some guy put a Luna picture saying 'The trolling has doubled.' Shinbu replies, 'Dude are you gay? You stupid piece of sh...' OK. Who were supposed to filter the negative reviews? Oh, wait wait wait. Hah. I remember this." He clicked on his remote and a portion of the screen enlarged. Applejack: You sick monster! Who the heck do ya think you are for tricking mah big brother into your lousy story! AppleBloom: You meanie! Bring back my big brother! Cheerilee: Damn you for taking the pony I love and putting him in this nightmare you call your 'fan fiction!' Pinkie Pie: Why haven't I appeared in your story yet?! The Author smiled. "I didn't know they would still be commenting this. That's good." He leaned from his chair. "Hold up. I'm getting another comment from Deftones89MX." A teenager laying down in his bed was diddling on his phone. His room was covered with pictures of his posse known as The Family. "Nice story. Just some errors you need to fix." The teenager typed. "Send. Hopefully this story will get updated soon. I could always play Left 4 Dead 2 in my Xbox 360 to kill some time." The Author sighed. "The day I see a comment from Deftones89MX that doesn't have the word 'error' is the day they release Half-Life 3...Oh well, thanks anyway Deftones89MX. You were my first commenter." "Um...sir...I've always wonder...what if Big Macintosh tried to escape?" "Fat chance. That fake story where his father was killed in the Everfree Forest should keep him away from the exit." The Author put his hand in his chin. "I think now is the perfect time that Big Macintosh proposed to Rarity." He took out a walkie talkie. "Hey Rarity actress." "I have a name ya know," said a voice that sounded like Rarity's voice but with a cockney accent. "But yes?" "You think you can marry Big Macintosh? As part of the story?" "Sure. I can do marriage. I'm just not doing babies." "I didn't say anything about kids, but I could always just make you wear a fat suit to make you look pregnant and adopt some kids. The dumber they are, the more Big Macky has to stay! Oh and you are getting an raise." "Sweet!" The Rarirty actress exclaimed as she turned off her walkie talkie. "So!" The Author exclaimed as he clapped his hands. "Let's work on the next chapter! Make Big Mac wake up in his bed. Make the actors and actresses convince that it was a bad dream. Simple! Nothing can go wrong!" Chapter 4 THE AUTHOR'S NOTES I apologize for what happened in the last chapter. I had to fire a sh*tload of employees. I 'promise' this chapter will have no trouble. If it doesn't, I'll eat my hat. Ha. Jokes on them, I don't own a hat. Stupid motherf-wait, they can still hear me? Oh sh- I'm sure you won't find anything wrong here. :) I hope you enjoy this chapter ;) Tthhee sun began to rose, covering the once dark fields with sunlight, showing its beautiful grass and colorful flowers. Ponies yawned in their homes and smiled as soon as they exited out of their homes to enjoy the sunshine ~~from Celestia.~~ Sweet Apple Acres was also covered by the sunlight. Applejack woke up from her bed, yawning as she got off to bed to make breakfast for her family whom she loved. AppleBloom woke up and got off of bed, wanting to wake up Granny Smith. She didn't want to be late for a planned date she had. Finally, Big Macintosh woke up. He got off his bed, letting out a long yawn as he ruffled his yellow mane. He let out a smile as he mumbled, "Eeyup." WHY THE HELL IS THERE NO HYPERLINK?-! He turned around and began to fix his bed, which was no problem for him. YOU'RE F*CKING FIRED!-!-!-! He left his room and headed for the kitchen, finding his family, sitting at the kitchen table eating breakfast. "Morning Applejack," Big Macintosh greeted, "You look different." The yellow Applejack actress nervously grinned. "I got a haircut." "Makes sense." Big Macintosh said with a smile. She placed a bowl of cereal in front of Big Macintosh. He smirked. "No pancakes?" 'Applejack' chuckled as she poured some warm milk over his cereal. "Not today big brother." Big Macintosh chuckled as he The Author, with a twitching eye, with immediately grabbed his chair and smashed it into one of his employees. "NEXT...TIME...DON'T...EVER...PUT...YOU...TUBE...VIDEOS...IN...THE MIDDLE...OF...THE...STORY!!!" He continued bashing the employee as other employees looked at them with a horrified expression. As soon as he was done smashing the chair on the poor guy, he went looked back to his large screen. "Alright." He said as he got out his remote control. "Let's fast forward a bit." Big Macintosh was walking with Rarity into town. Everypony seemed so happy. Venders were chattering with friendly customers. Other ponies helped others if they needed help. It was truly a happy sight. "Such a lovely day, is it not Big Mac?" She said as she nuzzled Big Macintosh. "Eeyup." "Oh look! It's Sweetie Belle!" Big Macintosh saw Sweetie Belle in a cafe. She was with her coltfriend, Button Mash. They were both sharing a vanilla milkshake. Their other friends were also in the same cafe, sitting at nearby tables. AppleBloom was with her coltfriend, Pipsqueak. They both happily nuzzled each other. Scootaloo was busy talking with her coltfriend, Rumble. Silver Spoon was chatting with her coltfriend, Spike. Diamond Tiara gave a quick peck to her new coltfriend. Ever since Silver Spoon dated Spike, they made Diamond Tiara, a bully even worse than Silver Spoon, turn over a new leaf. Two well known bullies now became one of the most respected and kind ponies in Ponyville. Ah...much better. Shoulda done this earlier. Big Macintosh smiled at the romantic sight. "I love you Rarity." Big Macintosh said to Rarity as he kissed his cheek. The Author facepalmed as he rocked his chair slightly. "Heh, heh, heh......WHY DOES IT SAY KISSED HIS CHEEK!!!??? IT'S HER, HER! NOT F*CKING HIM!!!! JUST END THE GODDAMNF*CKING CHAPTER!!!" CHAPTER END The same teenager, who was in his bed diddling on his phone, blinked. "Man, this is a weird story. It's alright but damn man. Get a goddamn editor or proofreader or something." The teen threw his phone away and picked up his XBOX 360 controller. He grabbed his headset and adjusted it to his head. "Let's hope Takashi and Joshua are online. But not Alexander. Oh lordy please no." He mumbled as he got up and turned on his XBOX 360 and grabbed his Left 4 Dead 2 disc he had next to his pile of XBOX 360 video game discs. The Author sighed. "Well, that was bad," he muttered as he put his hands on his face, "Huh. Why didn't Big Mac notice any of..." The Author widen his eyes as he quickly stood up. "What if...no...he..." He shook his head. "NO! He's not planning to escape, is he...?" His concerned face turned into an evil grin. "Not if I can help it..." He whispered as he took out his walkie talkie. He pushed a button on the device and put it up to his ear. "Hello?" he asked, "Good. You're there...guess what? You'll be making a guest appearance...mmkay?" "OKIE DOKIE LOKIE!" yelled a cheery voice from the walkie talkie. "Hehe, nice Pinkie Pie impression." The Author replied as he turned off his walkie talkie. "No way in hell you're leaving my story Macky." He evilly mumbled. The Author let out an evil laugh. His happiness was crushed by one sudden realization. "I misspelled the first word in this chapter...didn't I?" Author's Note Sorry for the wait, I've been recently busy. Had to do more stories. Please check 'em out. Thanks and pardons. Chapter 5The next day came, indicated by the sunrise on the horizon. Applejack got off of her bed. With a gentle yawn, she ruffled her mane playfully. "Hey big brother!" She yelled as she ran to his room. "Wake up!" She gently opened the door. "It's a new day today! Bucking trees and being with your true love! Come o-" She stopped talking and dropped her smile when she noticed that Big Macintosh's bed was empty, only a messy bed sheet was left on his soft bed. Applejack lowered her ears. "Oh sh*t." Big Macintosh lifted up his head, letting the calm soft breeze run through his tense yellow mane. He let out a ragged sigh, a soft faint cloud coming from his lips as he walked on the dirty path, occasionally crushing the leaves that laid on the brownish path. Its noises crushed the once forever silence in the Everfree Forest, which formed goosebumps in Big Macintosh's red coat. His gaze was fixed in the middle of his vision. His frown slowly turned into a scowl as he stopped his trotting. The leave-crushing sound was now silent near Big Macintosh's hooves. He knew that he had a different, yet similar, leave-crushing noise in front of him. His stony face hid the fear that built up in his large body. It can't be... Out of the shadows formed from the dark trees, came stallion, older than Big Macintosh, who had the same stony face as Big Macintosh, expect that Big Macintosh's face barely crumbled in fear. "It's been a while," mumbled the mysterious stallion, shaking his head gently, letting the breeze run through his dark yellow mane. Goosebumps also appeared on his green coat, but it was not from fear, but from anger. "Dad..." whispered Big Macintosh as his stony face finally broke apart, a tear-filled expression was all that was left, "You're alive..." "Surprised?" whispered the stallion, his face turning into a glare, "Ever since you left me here dead?" Big Macintosh lost control and let more tears fall into the ground. "I'm sorry Poppa...I'm so sorry." His father's expression didn't change. "You should be son." Large black torn vines emerged from the ground near Big Macintosh, "You should be." The vines immediately wrapped up around Big Macintosh's neck. As the vines tightened, Big Macintosh, now scared to his limits, struggled to free himself from this predicament. It was futile. As soon as he realized this, he closed his eyes and gave up. He was going to miss what he had always wanted to be a part of... AppleBloom getting her Cutie Mark... Marriage to Rarity... But most of all, he thought as he gave up his final breath, to know the truth... CUT!!! The Author carefully stroked his chin as a young man wearing a black suit let out a nervous smile. "So what do you think of it?" The young man asked. "Bullcrap. NEXT!!!!" Immediately, a bald man pushed the young man out of the way. He took out a CD from his coat he was wearing and placed it in the DVD player that was next to The Author. Big mac step into bontique Rarity i home. Big mac shout. Oh hay bm. Rarty shouted. CUTIEMARK CRUSADERS YAY Sweetie and two girls shouted. Marry me raity big m yelled Yay. Yelled she Everyone had sex and celestia made big mac prince since blueblood died. everybody die. The end. "Now THIS I like! You goddamned hired!" The Author barked with a wide smile as he gave a thumbs up to the bald man. "Umm...The Author?" "What?!" The Author angrily shouted to his messenger. "It was good! It was more funny! It wasn't like the other one! The other one was more serious, especially when Big Macintosh died! I wa-" "The Applejack actress wishes to speak to you." The messenger interrupted as he gave The Author a walkie talkie. The Author blinked as he calmly grabbed the walkie talkie. "Yello?" "Code Red. I repeat Code Red." "What the hell's a Code Red?" "Big Macintosh's missing." "Oh." The Author shrugged as he cleared his throat. "Check around the farm." "I did. Along with the Granny Smith and AppleBloom actresses. He's nowhere around." The Author gulped. "Well...um..." He suddenly grinned. "I think I know where he is..." "SURPRISE!!!!!" Pinkie Pie immediately broke into the Carousel Boutique. She was holding four board games. "BIG MACKY! I HEARD YOUSE FEELING DOWNY! SO LET'S PLAY SOME GAMES WITH YOU AND RARITY! IT'LL BE FUN!!!" Pinkie Pie, at a great speed, ran around the shop, searching for Big Macintosh. He also ran to closets, opening it. "Aha! I know where he is..." She quickly bursted into Rarity's bedroom. Her eyes shrunk when she only saw a passed out Rarity actress lying on her bed. Five empty beer bottles lay next to her. Pinkie Pie took out her walkie talkie. "He's not here." The Pinkie Pie actor said in a deep male voice. The Author almost wet his pants as soon as he heard the news. He lowered the walkie talkie and soon dropped it. The employees had concern expressions on their faces. With a fear-filled gulp, The Author mumbled, "END THE CHAPTER." CHAPTER END The teenager threw his phone at the wall. "OH COME ON!!!!" He hissed as he started to furiously punch his pillow, "What am I supposed to do now? Play Left 4 Dead with Ltmajordude? Jesus Christ!" Real World Sweet Apple Acres "He ended the chapter?" Applejack asked as she watched her younger sister, AppleBloom, opened a program in her laptop. "Maybe Macintosh found a way out of there!" "So what now?" Granny Smith asked, who was standing next to Applejack and AppleBloom, "Is there a way to see if he escaped?" "Thankfully," AppleBloom replied with a smile, "I can hack into that meanie's network and see what's going on." Applejack ran to the door. "I gotta get Rainbow Dash and the others to gather up. I just KNOW that he's gonna make it out of there! Might as well give him a lil' ol' welcome back visit." As soon as Applejack left, AppleBloom smiled as she finished typing on her laptop. "I'm in! Let's see what's going on in 'Big Macintosh's Story' now..." Big Macintosh's Story Ponyville "ATTENTION! BIG MACINTOSH HAS ESCAPED! FIND HIM AND KIL-er I mean DETAIN HIM! IF YOU KILL HIM THAT's ALR-crap uh...YOU GET THE IDEA!" The speakers that were hidden on roofs of ponies' homes kept playing this message as all the pony actors and actresses ran and scrambled around Ponyville to find Big Macintosh. "Find him?" The Rainbow Dash actress asked the flying Scootaloo actress. "Nope." The Scootaloo actress replied. "I checked everywhere. Even the clouds." "Damn it Scootaloo actress! He's an Earth pony! He can't fly!" "Ah shut up! You're just jealous that I can fly and you have to use fake wings to goddamn fly. Also, I have a goddamn name you know!" "Girls! Shut up and find the goddamn red bastard!" The Spike actor complained as he passed by the two actresses. The Fluttershy actress grumbled as she took out her walkie talkie while in mid-air. "Hello? Author? We still haven't foun-" She didn't finished her sentence as she rudely bumped into a pegasus actor. "Ump! HEY! WATCH WHERE'RE YOU'RE GOING, YOU STUPID F*CKING PIECE OF SH*T! DUMB F*CK!" The Fluttershy actress hissed as she dusted herself. "Sorry!" The pegasus actor apologized with a sad face. "YOU SHOULD BE, MOTHERF*CKER! Where was I? Oh yeah." She cleared her throat as she contacted The Author with her walkie talkie. "Still couldn't find him The Author!" The Author angrily stomped the floor, letting out an anger yell. "DAMN IT, DAMN IT, F*CKING DAMN IT! Just where else the bitch could be at?! Ponyville and the Everfree Forest are the only options! Everywhere else doesn't exist in my story! It's just a goddamn dome! Where could Big Mac-" The Author stopped as soon as he realized where Big Macintosh was all along. Real World Ponyville Schoolhouse Cheerilee sighed as she slumped to her desk. Recently, she was feeling glum, due to Big Macintosh's departure. After that Hearts and Hooves incident, she decided to go on a date with Big Macintosh, as some sort of punishment to the Cutie Mark Crusaders. However, secretly, she wanted to be on that date, not to punish the Crusaders, but to be with Big Macintosh. Ever since she met him in high school, she became smitten, especially with his calm demeanor. She became more happy and thrilled when AppleBloom came to school for the first time, since it meant that she could watch Big Macintosh come to pick up AppleBloom. She let out a sigh. Ever since that Author had kidnapped Big Macintosh and made him a part of his fanfiction, Cheerilee started to miss Big Macintosh, love him more. She opened her desk drawer. Inside, there was a picture of Big Macintosh and Cheerliee on a second date, around the time that the Crusaders were punished for that Hearts and Hooves incident. In the picture, Cheerilee gave Big Macintosh a small red charm. It was her good luck charm she received when she was a filly. When she gave it to Big Macintosh, she claimed that it was "a token of apology" for what happened. However, when she gave it to him, it meant more than that. She let out a small tear. "I love you, Big Macintosh..." "Hey Cheerilee!" Cheerilee almost jumped up and turned around to see a smiling Rainbow Dash. "I got some good news," Rainbow Dash said, "Guess who's coming back?" "How's the cameras?" The Author asked his technicians. One of the technicians gave The Author a thumbs up. "It's working. We can now fully see into the Everfree Forest." "I don't get it," another technician admitted, "Big Macintosh was scarred for life when we made up that story about how his father died. Why would he go back there?" The Author sighed. "I guess Big Mac finally grew a pair..." He took out his remote control and pressed the power button. "We have visual on that red bitch." Real World Near Everfree Forest "How did you get this giant TV screen?" "I dunno." Pinkie Pie answered to a curious Twilight Sparkle. "What really surprised me is that AppleBloom managed to connect the laptop to the screen." Applejack admitted to Twilight, "How did she not get her Cutie Mark yet?" "Well, at least everypony's here." Rainbow Dash stated as she turned around to see mostly everypony from Ponyville standing there, waiting patiently for Big Macintosh. Even Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were silent as they wanted to see how the events unfold. Standing in front of the huge crowd was the rest of the Mane 6, Big Macintosh's family, and Cheerilee. "Alright!" AppleBloom shouted to the crowd. "It's connected! Let's see how mah big brother's doing!" She then pressed the space bar on her laptop. Big Macintosh's Story Everfree Forest Big Macintosh slowly walked around in the dark forest. His heart pumped slightly faster as sound almost became nonexistent. A soft wind blew through the trees, running through his yellow mane. He let out a determined look. He will escape from this nightmare. Alright. We just need to scare him, so that he can go back to the farm. Simple. As Big Macintosh let out a sigh, he grabbed something from his saddlebag. Something he would consider his good luck charm. He took it out and stared at it as he put it right in front of him. Cheerilee's small red charm. He had secretly loved her since he met her in high school. He fell for her cheery and rebellious manner, especially that frizzled mane. He was filled with joy when he learned that when AppleBloom first started school, her teacher was none other than Cheerilee. He was glad when she punished the Crusaders on the day of the Hearts and Hooves incident. It gave him the chance to finally be with Cheerilee. He did not know that Cheerilee saw him take out the charm on the screen. She let out a tear. He had it all along...Does that mean...? Alright. You guys ready? Big Macintosh let out a tear as he held on to the charm tightly. "I love you Cheerilee..." I love you too Big Macintosh... Deploy Diversion1.exe. Immediately, ghostly sounds filled the forest. Big Macintosh didn't seem affected by this and calmly walked on, ignoring as the sounds began to sound more creepy. All that was in his mind was home, freedom, family, and Cheerilee. Damnit. Alright. Go with Diversion2.exe. A little extreme...but as you wish. As the sounds faded away, ground started trembling as the trees and plants started shaking. Big Macintosh seemed fazed by this, but still kept going on, focused on his mission. Sh*t. Diversion3.exe. Now. But sir. Isn't that going a bit too far? I said, NOW. The ground stopped its shaking and immediately, green dots appeared from the shadows. Big Macintosh gulped. Timberwolves. The green dots came out of the darkness, revealing that they were the eyes of what Big Macintosh guessed, Timberwolves. Not hesitating, the vicious creatures sprinted towards Big Macintosh. Nevertheless, he dodged their attacks and ran passed them. MOTHERF*CKER! EXECUTE Diversion4.exe!!! NOW!!!!!! No! This is going too far! I won't! I refuse! IDIOT!!!!! I'LL DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! The Timberwolves that were behind suddenly disappeared. Big Macintosh thought that he was in the clear now. He was wrong. The forest, like a finger snapping, immediately started raining and producing massive amount of thunder. The ghost sounds came back, this time making sounds of ponies dying and suffering. The ground trembled so hard that even the strongest trees fell to the ground like leaves. The Timberwolves appeared again, this time much bigger and much hungry. Big Macintosh let out a fear-filled expression. No. I can't do this...I CAN'T! He then looked into the charm and soon, for a while, forgot about everything in his presence. Applejack...AppleBloom...GrannySmith...Ponyville...Cheerilee... He gritted his teeth as hard as he can as he roared in the top of his lungs. "I'M COMING!!!" He immediately ran passed the monster, receiving only scratches, cuts, and bruises. He quickly dodged the falling trees and the thunderbolts that violently struck the ground. He hummed out the tunes of the agonizing sounds. The Author dropped his jaw as he saw what was happening in front of his eyes. All of Ponyville did the same. Cheerilee just started crying with joy. As soon as Big Macintosh continued on, receiving only minor wounds all over his body... THUD!!! Big Macintosh bumped into the seemingly dark air in front of him. This surprised him, along with the fact that the sounds, shaking, and monsters suddenly disappeared like a lightbulb going out. He touched the "air" a couple more times, until he realized that there was a small grey hole. He put his hoof in the hole and soon jiggled it a bit, revealing that there was a concealed grey door. He opened it slowly and noticed that inside was nothing but darkness, with the exception of a sign in the top of the doorway labeled "EXIT." The Author made no sound as he saw what happened in the screen. He took out a small microphone and sighed as he turned it on. "Need to do what needs to be done..." Big Macintosh gulped. "Home..." He muttered. "It's...finally over..." "Big Macintosh. Wait." Big Macintosh quickly turned around but saw nothing. "Heh. You can't see me. But I can see you. I'm kinda like God...except you probably don't know who God is..." Big Macintosh shook his head. "Who are you?" "I am The Author. I created this world that you are currently in." Big Macintosh growled. "You're a sick monster." "Oh am I? The one who gave you happiness, joy, peace?" "I know you tried to kill me with those diversions!" "I had no choice! Do you realize what your departure here will do to me?" "Let me guess. Ruin your story reputation?" "Correct." "Humpf. A selfish monster." Big Macintosh exclaimed as he turned to the exit. "Wait!" Big Macintosh turned around his head only. "You have a choice right now. A.) Live in my world. Live a peaceful life, be with your marefriend, be happy. The actors and actresses are so good, you'll think that they're the real residents of Ponyville. Or B.) Go back to your world. Be with your family...in the dangerous cruel world. Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon, Suri Polormare. Unhappiness will reign there. It always has. Is it worth having to be with your family and friends just for the cruelness there? Shouldn't your family care for you? Your friend respect you? Ha. Of course they don't. They want you to be in that world. Just to satisfy them. Some family and friends. They don't love you. Fake love over real hate Mac. My version of family and friends are enough. I'll even bring back your parents. I can do that...So what's it gonna be? 'A' or 'B?' Fake joy or real suffering, pain, and hate?" Big Macintosh stopped and thought for a bit. The Author looked a bit nervous as Big Macintosh thought his decision. All of Ponyville awaited his answer. The Apple family and Cheerilee knew, in their hearts, that Big Macintosh will pick the right choice. After some thinking, Big Macintosh finally let out a joyful smile. As soon as the Author saw the smile on Big Macintosh's face, he let out a frown. "You're going back to their world, aren't you?" Big Macintosh calmly replied, "Eeyup." All of Ponyville suddenly cheered and roared with joy. Applejack, AppleBloom, and Granny Smith cried with joy as they hugged each other. Cheerilee was shedding joyful tears as she looked up to the sky and thanked Celestia for everything. The employees uncomfortably stared at The Author. Who just stood there. His deadpanned expression refused to change. He stared at the screen, his right eye was slightly twitching. This ain't over yet Big Macintosh... Big Macintosh gave a bow before he turned around and headed to the exit. Real World Near Everfree Forest Everypony was silent as they stared at the forest. They were all anxious to see Big Macintosh. Immediately, he suddenly appeared in thin air. He blinked as he realized how quixkly that took. Before he could think another thought, his family came and tackled him, giving him tight hugs. "I missed ya Big Mac!" shouted Applejack, letting her tears fall on Big Macintosh. "Me too sonny!" yelled Granny Smith as she tighten the hug. "Me three big bro!" cried AppleBloom as she cried on Big Macintosh's chest. All of Ponyville cheered of his arrival, some ponies chanted his name. As the family stopped hugging Big Macintosh, he noticed Cheerilee not too far away, who was lightly kicking the dirt. She looked up and saw Big Macintosh coming towards her, making her blush a bit. As soon as they were close enough, they looked into each other's eyes. Tears came out of Cheerilee's eyes. Big Macintosh almost did the same thing. Immediately, Cheerilee gave Big Macintosh a big hug and cried on his shoulders. He simply hugged her back and gently kissed the side of her head. "I love you Cheerilee." "I love you too Big Macintosh." As he tighten the hug, he looked up to the sky, thanking Celestia that it was now over. He was finally home. And that, my dear readers, is the story of Big Macintosh. THE END...for now... The teenager calmly grabbed some chips from his Doritos Nacho Cheese bag. He placed them in his mouth, chewing the junk food as he placed his hand back to his controller. LTMAJORDUDE HAS JOINED YOUR XBOX LIVE PARTY "Hey what's up guys! It's me Lieutenant!" "Oh look who it is..." One of the XBOX LIVE party members grumbled. "Lieutenant, get out of the party." The teenager replied. "...OK..." LTMAJORDUDE HAS LEFT YOUR XBOX LIVE PARTY "I wonder when that Big Macintosh's Story is gonna get updated?" The teenager mumbled as he took a sip of his Mountain Dew. Author's Note I felt bad that I had to end this story...but I had to...in order to make the sequel. ;)
Chapter 1Sweet Apple Acres It was a beautiful morning. Celestia's sun started to rise and shine upon a certain house next to an apple farm. The morning silence was broken by a gentle yawning of an adult stallion. The stallion got off of his cozy bed, exposing a large green apple Cutie Mark on his large flank. Letting out another yawn, he walked up to a window. Letting out a smile, the red-skinned Earth pony happily muttered, "Eeyup." He ruffled up his yellow mane as he stared at the sun. "Such a beautiful day." He thought to himself. The weather was perfect too. All thanks to Rainbow Dash, who even made it to the Wonderbolts. "This really is a good life..." The red pony muttered with a grin. He lifted his nose and started sniffing. He smiled. His sister, Applejack, did make the best pancakes out of anypony is Equestria. He walked out of his bedroom and into the kitchen. A yellow filly, with a red bow on her head, smiled and walked up to the red pony. "Morning big brother!" She greeted as she hugged him. The red pony hugged back the filly. "Morning AppleBloom." An orange pony smiled as she put down a plate of piping hot pancakes with extra syrup. "Lovely day, isn't it Big Macintosh?" Big Macintosh nodded. "Indeed it is Applejack." He walked up to an elder green mare and gave her a small kiss on her forehead. "Morning Granny Smith." The green pony smiled. "Good morning Mac." Big Macintosh sat down and started to eat his pancakes. "Lovely breakfast Applejack." Big Macintosh gratefully said to his sister. Applejack laughed. "I cooks them just the way ya like them." After he finished breakfast, Big Macintosh went outside to do his work. With a harness on his back, he walked up to an apple tree and put baskets near it. He gave the tree a good kick and smiled as the apples from the tree fell into the basket. Big Macintosh observed all the other trees he had to harvest from. He let out a smile. "I still have time to visit Rarity." Rarity was Big Macintosh's marefriend. Big Macintosh couldn't wait until she becomes his wife. Nopony minded their relationship. Even Spike, who once had a major crush on Rarity. However, she was too old for him...and then Spike realized that Silver Spoon, one of the well-known bullies, had a crush on him. Now they became inseparable and madly in love. They even made Diamond Tiara, a bully even worse than Silver Spoon, turn over a new leaf. Two well known bullies now became one of the most respected and kind ponies in Ponyville. Big Macintosh grinned. This was the best life he had ever experienced. He walked up to another tree and kicked it. As the apples from the tree fell into the basket, he turned his head to the Everfree Forest. His smile suddenly vanished. "Big Mac!" "Poppa!" As Big Macintosh let out a small tear, Applejack suddenly appeared next to him. "Everything OK Big Macintosh?" Applejack asked her brother with a concerned face. Big Macintosh winced. "Whoa. Ya snuck up on me like that." Applejack frowned. "Sorry." Big Macintosh shook his head. "Don't apologize. Oh. And everything's OK." Applejack smiled and walked away. "Alrighty then." She said. "I still can't believe that she just snuck up on me like THAT." Big Macintosh muttered to himself. He shrugged. "I should probably get to work. Don't want to keep Rarity Belle waiting." He continued his work until it was past noon. He walked over to Carousel Boutique and knocked on the door. A small filly unicorn opened the door and smiled as she saw Big Macintosh. "Hi there Big Macintosh!" The filly shouted as she hugged Big Macintosh "Howdy Sweetie Belle." Big Macintosh said with a chuckle. The filly, Sweetie Belle, shouted, "Rarity! Big Macintosh's here!" A white unicorn appeared and smiled. "Hi there Big Macintosh." She said as she gave him a kiss on his cheek. He smiled and nuzzled her. "Howdy sugar." Sweetie Belle let out a da'www as she saw her older sister be with the stallion she loved. Rarity and Big Macintosh went out to a fancy restaurant that Rarity knew. The dinner was fantastic. Rarity ordered a fancy salad. and, of course, Big Mac did the usual, "I'll have what the lady's having," which made Rarity blush even more. After dinner (and of course a fancy apple pie for desert) Big Macintosh escorted Rarity back to her home. As they reached Carousel Boutique, Rarity gave Big Macintosh a big kiss on his lips. "Good night." Rarity said. "I love you." "I love ya too." Big Macintosh said with a big smile. As he walked home, he walked past the Everfree Forest. He gritted his teeth. "Ah don't know son...it looks pretty dark..." "Please Poppa! Just a bit more!" "But...(sigh)...alright..." "Son! Where are you!" "Big Mac!" "Poppa!" "NO!" Big Macintosh shook his head, wiping the tears from his face. "I'm sorry dad..." He whispered. "No. Ah promised that I wouldn't cry." Big Macintosh said as he sniffed. He walked back to his home. "It's getting dark. I should probably go to sleep right now..." He opened the door and noticed that the house was quiet. Everypony must be asleep. He walked into his room. "I can't wait for the biggest sleep...huh?" Big Macintosh noticed a small rip on the floor. He saw words and numbers and something called, "The Official MLP FanFiction Website." "What the..." Big Macintosh said with a raised eyebrow. "Big Macintosh?" Big Macintosh turned around and saw a tired AppleBloom. He looked back in the floor and, to his surprise, noticed that the rip was gone. Big Macintosh blinked. What happened to that rip? "What happened?" AppleBloom asked. Not wanting to worry AppleBloom, he smiled and patted her head. "Nothing AppleBloom. You should probably go to sleep. Heard ya got a date with Spike." AppleBloom yawned and smiled. "Alrighty. Oh, and it's a double date. Me and Spike are having lunch with Sweetie Belle and Button Mash." She said as she walked back to her room. Big Macintosh yawned. "Good for you AppleBloom." He lied down in his bed and dozed off. Tomorrow was gonna be a good day. Alright. Who the hell was suppose to fix that rip? It was me sir. Call the fire department, because your ass is fired.
Chapter 2The next day It was a beautiful morning. Celestia's sun started to rise and shine upon the Apple house. The morning silence was broken by a gentle yawning of Big Macintosh. The stallion got off of his cozy bed, exposing his large green apple Cutie Mark on his large flank. Letting out another yawn, he walked up to a window. Letting out a smile, the red pony happily muttered, "Eeyup." He ruffled up his yellow mane as he stared at the sun. "Such a beautiful day." He thought to himself. "This really is a good life..." The red pony muttered with a grin. He lifted his nose and started sniffing. He smiled. Applejack did make the best pancakes out of anypony is Equestria. He walked out of his bedroom and into the kitchen. AppleBloom smiled and walked up to the red pony. "Morning big brother!" She greeted as she hugged him. The red pony hugged back the filly. "Morning AppleBloom." Applejack smiled as she put down a plate of piping hot pancakes with extra syrup. "Lovely day, isn't it Big Macintosh?" Big Macintosh nodded. "Indeed it is Applejack." He walked up to Granny Smith and gave her a small kiss on her forehead. "Morning Granny Smith." The green pony smiled. "Good morning Mac." Big Macintosh sat down and started to eat his pancakes. "Lovely breakfast Applejack." Big Macintosh gratefully said to his sister. Applejack laughed. "I cooks them just the way ya like them." After he finished breakfast, Big Macintosh went outside to do his work. With a harness on his back, he walked up to an apple tree and put baskets near it. He gave the tree a good kick and smiled as the apples from the tree fell into the basket. Big Macintosh observed all the other trees he had to harvest from. He let out a smile. "I still have time to visit Rarity." Rarity was Big Macintosh's marefriend. Big Macintosh couldn't wait until she becomes his wife. Nopony minded their relationship. Even Spike, who once had a major crush on Rarity. ~~However, she was too old for him...and then Spike realized that Silver Spoon, one of the well-known bullies, had a crush on him.~~ So that's where that mistake was... However, she was too old for him...and then Spike realized that AppleBloom, Big Macintosh's youngest sister, had a crush on him. There we go. Despite endless insults from Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, two well-known bullies, Spike and AppleBloom became inseparable and madly in love. Crap. Those two rich brats remain evil...ah f*ck it. Big Macintosh blinked. "What was that?" He said to himself. Something happened. He couldn't hear it or see it, he just felt like something happened. It was like that incident last night... "Hey Big Macintosh!" Applejack suddenly appeared next to him. Big Macintosh jumped. "Ya scared me there Applejack." Applejack grinned nervously. "Sorry." Big Macintosh shook his head. "Don't worry about it." Applejack smiled and walked away. "Alrighty then." She said. "Hey sis." "Yeah?" "Is it me...or is this day kinda like the same like yesterday?" Applejack froze. "Um...well..ah..." Change the subject. "I heard that there's gonna be a dance and Spike's taking Silver Spoon." Spike's dating AppleBloom. "I mean AppleBloom!" (Sigh) Big Macintosh looked dumbfounded. "OK..." Applejack let out a stupid smile. "Oh look at the time! It's time for me to...do stuff. Bye," She ran away as Big Macintosh just stood there. "Huh." Eventually, he got his work done and visited Rarity. They sat down on a bench. "Hey Rarity, can I ask ya something?" "Sure. What is it?" Big Macintosh sighed. "It feels like...there's something going on. Something weird." Rarity cringed. "Oh, I'm sure it's nothing...hey, remember when we first met?" Big Macintosh nodded. "Yeah...it was Hearts and Hooves Day...and those Cutie Mark Crusaders thought you needed a date so they..." He stopped. Wasn't it Cheerilee that the Cutie Mark Crusaders wanted? Not Rarity? "Something wrong?" "Oh um...nothing Rarity." Big Macintosh frowned. Cheerilee...wasn't she the one whom he fell for? He sighed. "What the buck is going on?" He whispered. Nighttime came and Rarity was escorted home by Big Macintosh. He went home and went to bed. He sighed. "Something's wrong...and I'm gonna find out..." He muttered as he fell asleep. Um sir... Yes? Is it alright if I...um...point out some mistakes...? What mistakes? Well, it feels rushed, you just fixed a mistake improperly, you entirely ripped off your first chapter for the beginning, and don't get me started with the spaci... Ok ok. By the way, are you the Human Torch? Um...no? Well you must be...because YOU'RE F*CKING FIRED. Oh and be a sport and fire that actress who's playing as Applejack, mmkay? Oh god I'm talking like that Suri...I hate her.
Chapter 3The next day It was a beautiful morning. Celestia's sun starte- Let's just skip to the chase. Big Macintosh woke up. "It happened again..." He got off of his bed. OK. AppleBloom, say good morning to your 'brother' and Granny Smith...just...do whatever you do. Big Macintosh quickly turned around. "Who's there?" What do ya mean the new Applejack can't cook?-! Just...make something! I don't care! Big Macintosh twitched his eye. "Somepony's here." AppleBloom! What's taking you so long?-! "WHERE ARE YOU?-!" "Macintosh!" Big Macintosh turned around and saw AppleBloom. "AppleBloom! Did ya hear that..." "No. I didn't hear The Author talking!" AppleBloom said with a shrug. Big Macintosh gave her a glare. "What did ya say...?" He whispered. AppleBloom's ears dropped. "Uh...I...um...ah..." Nice going 'AppleBloom,' you're fired. Somepony knock out Big Mac. "SHOW YOURSELF, WHOEVER YOU ARE!" shouted Big Macintosh. A yellow mare who looked like Applejack came with a chair and hit Big Macintosh in the head, knocking him out. CHAPTER END A human sighed as he put his hand on his forehead. He rocked his chair he was sitting on. He was in a room filled with computers, devices, and his pony staff. There was a large screen in front of the human. "Get the AppleBloom actress." He said blankly. A pony who looked like AppleBloom walked into the room. She let out a nervous look as she stood before the human. "Alright look." The doppelgänger said with a New York accent. "I screwed up, ok? But I promise I..." "I promise you're fired." The human interrupted. The AppleBloom look-alike let out a shocked face before it turned into an angry face. "Alright! The buck with youse! I don't need this crap! There are other fan fictions to star in! I'll be in a good fan fiction! Maybe this one where I meet these other stupid blank flanks in a forest..." She shouted as she walked away. The human rolled his eyes. "A little rough, huh Author?" The human's mare assistant said. "Full name please." "Oh...um...The Author." "Thank ye very much." The human said as he let out a cheerful smile. "Let's see what the readers think!" He took out a remote control and pointed it to the large screen. He pressed a button and the screen turned on. "Let's see...ZAGNA says, 'Get off of this fanfic site.' Some guy put a Luna picture saying 'The trolling has doubled.' Shinbu replies, 'Dude are you gay? You stupid piece of sh...' OK. Who were supposed to filter the negative reviews? Oh, wait wait wait. Hah. I remember this." He clicked on his remote and a portion of the screen enlarged. Applejack: You sick monster! Who the heck do ya think you are for tricking mah big brother into your lousy story! AppleBloom: You meanie! Bring back my big brother! Cheerilee: Damn you for taking the pony I love and putting him in this nightmare you call your 'fan fiction!' Pinkie Pie: Why haven't I appeared in your story yet?! The Author smiled. "I didn't know they would still be commenting this. That's good." He leaned from his chair. "Hold up. I'm getting another comment from Deftones89MX." A teenager laying down in his bed was diddling on his phone. His room was covered with pictures of his posse known as The Family. "Nice story. Just some errors you need to fix." The teenager typed. "Send. Hopefully this story will get updated soon. I could always play Left 4 Dead 2 in my Xbox 360 to kill some time." The Author sighed. "The day I see a comment from Deftones89MX that doesn't have the word 'error' is the day they release Half-Life 3...Oh well, thanks anyway Deftones89MX. You were my first commenter." "Um...sir...I've always wonder...what if Big Macintosh tried to escape?" "Fat chance. That fake story where his father was killed in the Everfree Forest should keep him away from the exit." The Author put his hand in his chin. "I think now is the perfect time that Big Macintosh proposed to Rarity." He took out a walkie talkie. "Hey Rarity actress." "I have a name ya know," said a voice that sounded like Rarity's voice but with a cockney accent. "But yes?" "You think you can marry Big Macintosh? As part of the story?" "Sure. I can do marriage. I'm just not doing babies." "I didn't say anything about kids, but I could always just make you wear a fat suit to make you look pregnant and adopt some kids. The dumber they are, the more Big Macky has to stay! Oh and you are getting an raise." "Sweet!" The Rarirty actress exclaimed as she turned off her walkie talkie. "So!" The Author exclaimed as he clapped his hands. "Let's work on the next chapter! Make Big Mac wake up in his bed. Make the actors and actresses convince that it was a bad dream. Simple! Nothing can go wrong!"
Chapter 4 THE AUTHOR'S NOTES I apologize for what happened in the last chapter. I had to fire a sh*tload of employees. I 'promise' this chapter will have no trouble. If it doesn't, I'll eat my hat. Ha. Jokes on them, I don't own a hat. Stupid motherf-wait, they can still hear me? Oh sh- I'm sure you won't find anything wrong here. :) I hope you enjoy this chapter ;) Tthhee sun began to rose, covering the once dark fields with sunlight, showing its beautiful grass and colorful flowers. Ponies yawned in their homes and smiled as soon as they exited out of their homes to enjoy the sunshine ~~from Celestia.~~ Sweet Apple Acres was also covered by the sunlight. Applejack woke up from her bed, yawning as she got off to bed to make breakfast for her family whom she loved. AppleBloom woke up and got off of bed, wanting to wake up Granny Smith. She didn't want to be late for a planned date she had. Finally, Big Macintosh woke up. He got off his bed, letting out a long yawn as he ruffled his yellow mane. He let out a smile as he mumbled, "Eeyup." WHY THE HELL IS THERE NO HYPERLINK?-! He turned around and began to fix his bed, which was no problem for him. YOU'RE F*CKING FIRED!-!-!-! He left his room and headed for the kitchen, finding his family, sitting at the kitchen table eating breakfast. "Morning Applejack," Big Macintosh greeted, "You look different." The yellow Applejack actress nervously grinned. "I got a haircut." "Makes sense." Big Macintosh said with a smile. She placed a bowl of cereal in front of Big Macintosh. He smirked. "No pancakes?" 'Applejack' chuckled as she poured some warm milk over his cereal. "Not today big brother." Big Macintosh chuckled as he The Author, with a twitching eye, with immediately grabbed his chair and smashed it into one of his employees. "NEXT...TIME...DON'T...EVER...PUT...YOU...TUBE...VIDEOS...IN...THE MIDDLE...OF...THE...STORY!!!" He continued bashing the employee as other employees looked at them with a horrified expression. As soon as he was done smashing the chair on the poor guy, he went looked back to his large screen. "Alright." He said as he got out his remote control. "Let's fast forward a bit." Big Macintosh was walking with Rarity into town. Everypony seemed so happy. Venders were chattering with friendly customers. Other ponies helped others if they needed help. It was truly a happy sight. "Such a lovely day, is it not Big Mac?" She said as she nuzzled Big Macintosh. "Eeyup." "Oh look! It's Sweetie Belle!" Big Macintosh saw Sweetie Belle in a cafe. She was with her coltfriend, Button Mash. They were both sharing a vanilla milkshake. Their other friends were also in the same cafe, sitting at nearby tables. AppleBloom was with her coltfriend, Pipsqueak. They both happily nuzzled each other. Scootaloo was busy talking with her coltfriend, Rumble. Silver Spoon was chatting with her coltfriend, Spike. Diamond Tiara gave a quick peck to her new coltfriend. Ever since Silver Spoon dated Spike, they made Diamond Tiara, a bully even worse than Silver Spoon, turn over a new leaf. Two well known bullies now became one of the most respected and kind ponies in Ponyville. Ah...much better. Shoulda done this earlier. Big Macintosh smiled at the romantic sight. "I love you Rarity." Big Macintosh said to Rarity as he kissed his cheek. The Author facepalmed as he rocked his chair slightly. "Heh, heh, heh......WHY DOES IT SAY KISSED HIS CHEEK!!!??? IT'S HER, HER! NOT F*CKING HIM!!!! JUST END THE GODDAMNF*CKING CHAPTER!!!" CHAPTER END The same teenager, who was in his bed diddling on his phone, blinked. "Man, this is a weird story. It's alright but damn man. Get a goddamn editor or proofreader or something." The teen threw his phone away and picked up his XBOX 360 controller. He grabbed his headset and adjusted it to his head. "Let's hope Takashi and Joshua are online. But not Alexander. Oh lordy please no." He mumbled as he got up and turned on his XBOX 360 and grabbed his Left 4 Dead 2 disc he had next to his pile of XBOX 360 video game discs. The Author sighed. "Well, that was bad," he muttered as he put his hands on his face, "Huh. Why didn't Big Mac notice any of..." The Author widen his eyes as he quickly stood up. "What if...no...he..." He shook his head. "NO! He's not planning to escape, is he...?" His concerned face turned into an evil grin. "Not if I can help it..." He whispered as he took out his walkie talkie. He pushed a button on the device and put it up to his ear. "Hello?" he asked, "Good. You're there...guess what? You'll be making a guest appearance...mmkay?" "OKIE DOKIE LOKIE!" yelled a cheery voice from the walkie talkie. "Hehe, nice Pinkie Pie impression." The Author replied as he turned off his walkie talkie. "No way in hell you're leaving my story Macky." He evilly mumbled. The Author let out an evil laugh. His happiness was crushed by one sudden realization. "I misspelled the first word in this chapter...didn't I?" Author's Note Sorry for the wait, I've been recently busy. Had to do more stories. Please check 'em out. Thanks and pardons.
Chapter 5The next day came, indicated by the sunrise on the horizon. Applejack got off of her bed. With a gentle yawn, she ruffled her mane playfully. "Hey big brother!" She yelled as she ran to his room. "Wake up!" She gently opened the door. "It's a new day today! Bucking trees and being with your true love! Come o-" She stopped talking and dropped her smile when she noticed that Big Macintosh's bed was empty, only a messy bed sheet was left on his soft bed. Applejack lowered her ears. "Oh sh*t." Big Macintosh lifted up his head, letting the calm soft breeze run through his tense yellow mane. He let out a ragged sigh, a soft faint cloud coming from his lips as he walked on the dirty path, occasionally crushing the leaves that laid on the brownish path. Its noises crushed the once forever silence in the Everfree Forest, which formed goosebumps in Big Macintosh's red coat. His gaze was fixed in the middle of his vision. His frown slowly turned into a scowl as he stopped his trotting. The leave-crushing sound was now silent near Big Macintosh's hooves. He knew that he had a different, yet similar, leave-crushing noise in front of him. His stony face hid the fear that built up in his large body. It can't be... Out of the shadows formed from the dark trees, came stallion, older than Big Macintosh, who had the same stony face as Big Macintosh, expect that Big Macintosh's face barely crumbled in fear. "It's been a while," mumbled the mysterious stallion, shaking his head gently, letting the breeze run through his dark yellow mane. Goosebumps also appeared on his green coat, but it was not from fear, but from anger. "Dad..." whispered Big Macintosh as his stony face finally broke apart, a tear-filled expression was all that was left, "You're alive..." "Surprised?" whispered the stallion, his face turning into a glare, "Ever since you left me here dead?" Big Macintosh lost control and let more tears fall into the ground. "I'm sorry Poppa...I'm so sorry." His father's expression didn't change. "You should be son." Large black torn vines emerged from the ground near Big Macintosh, "You should be." The vines immediately wrapped up around Big Macintosh's neck. As the vines tightened, Big Macintosh, now scared to his limits, struggled to free himself from this predicament. It was futile. As soon as he realized this, he closed his eyes and gave up. He was going to miss what he had always wanted to be a part of... AppleBloom getting her Cutie Mark... Marriage to Rarity... But most of all, he thought as he gave up his final breath, to know the truth... CUT!!! The Author carefully stroked his chin as a young man wearing a black suit let out a nervous smile. "So what do you think of it?" The young man asked. "Bullcrap. NEXT!!!!" Immediately, a bald man pushed the young man out of the way. He took out a CD from his coat he was wearing and placed it in the DVD player that was next to The Author. Big mac step into bontique Rarity i home. Big mac shout. Oh hay bm. Rarty shouted. CUTIEMARK CRUSADERS YAY Sweetie and two girls shouted. Marry me raity big m yelled Yay. Yelled she Everyone had sex and celestia made big mac prince since blueblood died. everybody die. The end. "Now THIS I like! You goddamned hired!" The Author barked with a wide smile as he gave a thumbs up to the bald man. "Umm...The Author?" "What?!" The Author angrily shouted to his messenger. "It was good! It was more funny! It wasn't like the other one! The other one was more serious, especially when Big Macintosh died! I wa-" "The Applejack actress wishes to speak to you." The messenger interrupted as he gave The Author a walkie talkie. The Author blinked as he calmly grabbed the walkie talkie. "Yello?" "Code Red. I repeat Code Red." "What the hell's a Code Red?" "Big Macintosh's missing." "Oh." The Author shrugged as he cleared his throat. "Check around the farm." "I did. Along with the Granny Smith and AppleBloom actresses. He's nowhere around." The Author gulped. "Well...um..." He suddenly grinned. "I think I know where he is..." "SURPRISE!!!!!" Pinkie Pie immediately broke into the Carousel Boutique. She was holding four board games. "BIG MACKY! I HEARD YOUSE FEELING DOWNY! SO LET'S PLAY SOME GAMES WITH YOU AND RARITY! IT'LL BE FUN!!!" Pinkie Pie, at a great speed, ran around the shop, searching for Big Macintosh. He also ran to closets, opening it. "Aha! I know where he is..." She quickly bursted into Rarity's bedroom. Her eyes shrunk when she only saw a passed out Rarity actress lying on her bed. Five empty beer bottles lay next to her. Pinkie Pie took out her walkie talkie. "He's not here." The Pinkie Pie actor said in a deep male voice. The Author almost wet his pants as soon as he heard the news. He lowered the walkie talkie and soon dropped it. The employees had concern expressions on their faces. With a fear-filled gulp, The Author mumbled, "END THE CHAPTER." CHAPTER END The teenager threw his phone at the wall. "OH COME ON!!!!" He hissed as he started to furiously punch his pillow, "What am I supposed to do now? Play Left 4 Dead with Ltmajordude? Jesus Christ!" Real World Sweet Apple Acres "He ended the chapter?" Applejack asked as she watched her younger sister, AppleBloom, opened a program in her laptop. "Maybe Macintosh found a way out of there!" "So what now?" Granny Smith asked, who was standing next to Applejack and AppleBloom, "Is there a way to see if he escaped?" "Thankfully," AppleBloom replied with a smile, "I can hack into that meanie's network and see what's going on." Applejack ran to the door. "I gotta get Rainbow Dash and the others to gather up. I just KNOW that he's gonna make it out of there! Might as well give him a lil' ol' welcome back visit." As soon as Applejack left, AppleBloom smiled as she finished typing on her laptop. "I'm in! Let's see what's going on in 'Big Macintosh's Story' now..." Big Macintosh's Story Ponyville "ATTENTION! BIG MACINTOSH HAS ESCAPED! FIND HIM AND KIL-er I mean DETAIN HIM! IF YOU KILL HIM THAT's ALR-crap uh...YOU GET THE IDEA!" The speakers that were hidden on roofs of ponies' homes kept playing this message as all the pony actors and actresses ran and scrambled around Ponyville to find Big Macintosh. "Find him?" The Rainbow Dash actress asked the flying Scootaloo actress. "Nope." The Scootaloo actress replied. "I checked everywhere. Even the clouds." "Damn it Scootaloo actress! He's an Earth pony! He can't fly!" "Ah shut up! You're just jealous that I can fly and you have to use fake wings to goddamn fly. Also, I have a goddamn name you know!" "Girls! Shut up and find the goddamn red bastard!" The Spike actor complained as he passed by the two actresses. The Fluttershy actress grumbled as she took out her walkie talkie while in mid-air. "Hello? Author? We still haven't foun-" She didn't finished her sentence as she rudely bumped into a pegasus actor. "Ump! HEY! WATCH WHERE'RE YOU'RE GOING, YOU STUPID F*CKING PIECE OF SH*T! DUMB F*CK!" The Fluttershy actress hissed as she dusted herself. "Sorry!" The pegasus actor apologized with a sad face. "YOU SHOULD BE, MOTHERF*CKER! Where was I? Oh yeah." She cleared her throat as she contacted The Author with her walkie talkie. "Still couldn't find him The Author!" The Author angrily stomped the floor, letting out an anger yell. "DAMN IT, DAMN IT, F*CKING DAMN IT! Just where else the bitch could be at?! Ponyville and the Everfree Forest are the only options! Everywhere else doesn't exist in my story! It's just a goddamn dome! Where could Big Mac-" The Author stopped as soon as he realized where Big Macintosh was all along. Real World Ponyville Schoolhouse Cheerilee sighed as she slumped to her desk. Recently, she was feeling glum, due to Big Macintosh's departure. After that Hearts and Hooves incident, she decided to go on a date with Big Macintosh, as some sort of punishment to the Cutie Mark Crusaders. However, secretly, she wanted to be on that date, not to punish the Crusaders, but to be with Big Macintosh. Ever since she met him in high school, she became smitten, especially with his calm demeanor. She became more happy and thrilled when AppleBloom came to school for the first time, since it meant that she could watch Big Macintosh come to pick up AppleBloom. She let out a sigh. Ever since that Author had kidnapped Big Macintosh and made him a part of his fanfiction, Cheerilee started to miss Big Macintosh, love him more. She opened her desk drawer. Inside, there was a picture of Big Macintosh and Cheerliee on a second date, around the time that the Crusaders were punished for that Hearts and Hooves incident. In the picture, Cheerilee gave Big Macintosh a small red charm. It was her good luck charm she received when she was a filly. When she gave it to Big Macintosh, she claimed that it was "a token of apology" for what happened. However, when she gave it to him, it meant more than that. She let out a small tear. "I love you, Big Macintosh..." "Hey Cheerilee!" Cheerilee almost jumped up and turned around to see a smiling Rainbow Dash. "I got some good news," Rainbow Dash said, "Guess who's coming back?" "How's the cameras?" The Author asked his technicians. One of the technicians gave The Author a thumbs up. "It's working. We can now fully see into the Everfree Forest." "I don't get it," another technician admitted, "Big Macintosh was scarred for life when we made up that story about how his father died. Why would he go back there?" The Author sighed. "I guess Big Mac finally grew a pair..." He took out his remote control and pressed the power button. "We have visual on that red bitch." Real World Near Everfree Forest "How did you get this giant TV screen?" "I dunno." Pinkie Pie answered to a curious Twilight Sparkle. "What really surprised me is that AppleBloom managed to connect the laptop to the screen." Applejack admitted to Twilight, "How did she not get her Cutie Mark yet?" "Well, at least everypony's here." Rainbow Dash stated as she turned around to see mostly everypony from Ponyville standing there, waiting patiently for Big Macintosh. Even Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were silent as they wanted to see how the events unfold. Standing in front of the huge crowd was the rest of the Mane 6, Big Macintosh's family, and Cheerilee. "Alright!" AppleBloom shouted to the crowd. "It's connected! Let's see how mah big brother's doing!" She then pressed the space bar on her laptop. Big Macintosh's Story Everfree Forest Big Macintosh slowly walked around in the dark forest. His heart pumped slightly faster as sound almost became nonexistent. A soft wind blew through the trees, running through his yellow mane. He let out a determined look. He will escape from this nightmare. Alright. We just need to scare him, so that he can go back to the farm. Simple. As Big Macintosh let out a sigh, he grabbed something from his saddlebag. Something he would consider his good luck charm. He took it out and stared at it as he put it right in front of him. Cheerilee's small red charm. He had secretly loved her since he met her in high school. He fell for her cheery and rebellious manner, especially that frizzled mane. He was filled with joy when he learned that when AppleBloom first started school, her teacher was none other than Cheerilee. He was glad when she punished the Crusaders on the day of the Hearts and Hooves incident. It gave him the chance to finally be with Cheerilee. He did not know that Cheerilee saw him take out the charm on the screen. She let out a tear. He had it all along...Does that mean...? Alright. You guys ready? Big Macintosh let out a tear as he held on to the charm tightly. "I love you Cheerilee..." I love you too Big Macintosh... Deploy Diversion1.exe. Immediately, ghostly sounds filled the forest. Big Macintosh didn't seem affected by this and calmly walked on, ignoring as the sounds began to sound more creepy. All that was in his mind was home, freedom, family, and Cheerilee. Damnit. Alright. Go with Diversion2.exe. A little extreme...but as you wish. As the sounds faded away, ground started trembling as the trees and plants started shaking. Big Macintosh seemed fazed by this, but still kept going on, focused on his mission. Sh*t. Diversion3.exe. Now. But sir. Isn't that going a bit too far? I said, NOW. The ground stopped its shaking and immediately, green dots appeared from the shadows. Big Macintosh gulped. Timberwolves. The green dots came out of the darkness, revealing that they were the eyes of what Big Macintosh guessed, Timberwolves. Not hesitating, the vicious creatures sprinted towards Big Macintosh. Nevertheless, he dodged their attacks and ran passed them. MOTHERF*CKER! EXECUTE Diversion4.exe!!! NOW!!!!!! No! This is going too far! I won't! I refuse! IDIOT!!!!! I'LL DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! The Timberwolves that were behind suddenly disappeared. Big Macintosh thought that he was in the clear now. He was wrong. The forest, like a finger snapping, immediately started raining and producing massive amount of thunder. The ghost sounds came back, this time making sounds of ponies dying and suffering. The ground trembled so hard that even the strongest trees fell to the ground like leaves. The Timberwolves appeared again, this time much bigger and much hungry. Big Macintosh let out a fear-filled expression. No. I can't do this...I CAN'T! He then looked into the charm and soon, for a while, forgot about everything in his presence. Applejack...AppleBloom...GrannySmith...Ponyville...Cheerilee... He gritted his teeth as hard as he can as he roared in the top of his lungs. "I'M COMING!!!" He immediately ran passed the monster, receiving only scratches, cuts, and bruises. He quickly dodged the falling trees and the thunderbolts that violently struck the ground. He hummed out the tunes of the agonizing sounds. The Author dropped his jaw as he saw what was happening in front of his eyes. All of Ponyville did the same. Cheerilee just started crying with joy. As soon as Big Macintosh continued on, receiving only minor wounds all over his body... THUD!!! Big Macintosh bumped into the seemingly dark air in front of him. This surprised him, along with the fact that the sounds, shaking, and monsters suddenly disappeared like a lightbulb going out. He touched the "air" a couple more times, until he realized that there was a small grey hole. He put his hoof in the hole and soon jiggled it a bit, revealing that there was a concealed grey door. He opened it slowly and noticed that inside was nothing but darkness, with the exception of a sign in the top of the doorway labeled "EXIT." The Author made no sound as he saw what happened in the screen. He took out a small microphone and sighed as he turned it on. "Need to do what needs to be done..." Big Macintosh gulped. "Home..." He muttered. "It's...finally over..." "Big Macintosh. Wait." Big Macintosh quickly turned around but saw nothing. "Heh. You can't see me. But I can see you. I'm kinda like God...except you probably don't know who God is..." Big Macintosh shook his head. "Who are you?" "I am The Author. I created this world that you are currently in." Big Macintosh growled. "You're a sick monster." "Oh am I? The one who gave you happiness, joy, peace?" "I know you tried to kill me with those diversions!" "I had no choice! Do you realize what your departure here will do to me?" "Let me guess. Ruin your story reputation?" "Correct." "Humpf. A selfish monster." Big Macintosh exclaimed as he turned to the exit. "Wait!" Big Macintosh turned around his head only. "You have a choice right now. A.) Live in my world. Live a peaceful life, be with your marefriend, be happy. The actors and actresses are so good, you'll think that they're the real residents of Ponyville. Or B.) Go back to your world. Be with your family...in the dangerous cruel world. Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon, Suri Polormare. Unhappiness will reign there. It always has. Is it worth having to be with your family and friends just for the cruelness there? Shouldn't your family care for you? Your friend respect you? Ha. Of course they don't. They want you to be in that world. Just to satisfy them. Some family and friends. They don't love you. Fake love over real hate Mac. My version of family and friends are enough. I'll even bring back your parents. I can do that...So what's it gonna be? 'A' or 'B?' Fake joy or real suffering, pain, and hate?" Big Macintosh stopped and thought for a bit. The Author looked a bit nervous as Big Macintosh thought his decision. All of Ponyville awaited his answer. The Apple family and Cheerilee knew, in their hearts, that Big Macintosh will pick the right choice. After some thinking, Big Macintosh finally let out a joyful smile. As soon as the Author saw the smile on Big Macintosh's face, he let out a frown. "You're going back to their world, aren't you?" Big Macintosh calmly replied, "Eeyup." All of Ponyville suddenly cheered and roared with joy. Applejack, AppleBloom, and Granny Smith cried with joy as they hugged each other. Cheerilee was shedding joyful tears as she looked up to the sky and thanked Celestia for everything. The employees uncomfortably stared at The Author. Who just stood there. His deadpanned expression refused to change. He stared at the screen, his right eye was slightly twitching. This ain't over yet Big Macintosh... Big Macintosh gave a bow before he turned around and headed to the exit. Real World Near Everfree Forest Everypony was silent as they stared at the forest. They were all anxious to see Big Macintosh. Immediately, he suddenly appeared in thin air. He blinked as he realized how quixkly that took. Before he could think another thought, his family came and tackled him, giving him tight hugs. "I missed ya Big Mac!" shouted Applejack, letting her tears fall on Big Macintosh. "Me too sonny!" yelled Granny Smith as she tighten the hug. "Me three big bro!" cried AppleBloom as she cried on Big Macintosh's chest. All of Ponyville cheered of his arrival, some ponies chanted his name. As the family stopped hugging Big Macintosh, he noticed Cheerilee not too far away, who was lightly kicking the dirt. She looked up and saw Big Macintosh coming towards her, making her blush a bit. As soon as they were close enough, they looked into each other's eyes. Tears came out of Cheerilee's eyes. Big Macintosh almost did the same thing. Immediately, Cheerilee gave Big Macintosh a big hug and cried on his shoulders. He simply hugged her back and gently kissed the side of her head. "I love you Cheerilee." "I love you too Big Macintosh." As he tighten the hug, he looked up to the sky, thanking Celestia that it was now over. He was finally home. And that, my dear readers, is the story of Big Macintosh. THE END...for now... The teenager calmly grabbed some chips from his Doritos Nacho Cheese bag. He placed them in his mouth, chewing the junk food as he placed his hand back to his controller. LTMAJORDUDE HAS JOINED YOUR XBOX LIVE PARTY "Hey what's up guys! It's me Lieutenant!" "Oh look who it is..." One of the XBOX LIVE party members grumbled. "Lieutenant, get out of the party." The teenager replied. "...OK..." LTMAJORDUDE HAS LEFT YOUR XBOX LIVE PARTY "I wonder when that Big Macintosh's Story is gonna get updated?" The teenager mumbled as he took a sip of his Mountain Dew. Author's Note I felt bad that I had to end this story...but I had to...in order to make the sequel. ;)
