Vampony Survival Guide Tales
Raiding Party
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Raiding Party
Patches' estimate was pretty far off, I wish I could say I was surprised. It took him at least two hours to wrap up whatever he needed to get done and pack, then catch up with me. I remember hearing that it was a bad idea for a Pegasus to take to the skies so Patches either didn't know about that little bit of information, or he had truly exhausted every last fuck he had to give. Considering what I saw that morning the latter was quite possible...
"INCOMIIIIIIIIIIINNNG!!!" Patches bellowed as he descended, crashing through the treetops and snapping several branches unfortunate enough to exist in his path. With a powerful beat of his wings he landed quite softly next to me, that giant shit-eating grin plastered on his face.
"Well, if they didn't know we were here before, they definitely do now," I grumbled at him. “You also got a little something in your teeth,” I mocked, pointing at the leaves that had been wedged in between his teeth by the force of him slamming through the branches. There were also several twigs stuck in his mane, but he didn’t seem to mind any of it.
"Aww I hoped having a vamp or two around to beat senseless could help lift your spirits!" His smile only widened as he threw his arms out.
Patches looked pretty different from this morning. He had donned a set of armor that seemed to be mostly made out of leather, but if there was anything I had learned about Patches was that he was all about deception. His shoulders and forearms had metal plates on them, but I fully expected the rest of his leather armor was a facade for something far sturdier. He had a bandolier full of those frighteningly large rounds for his rifle slung across his body, along with an ammunition box at his left hip. He had a bad habit of making everything normal-sized look small.
He was also wearing a sort of utility belt and I could make out the handles of several different tools in their sheaths. Attached to his right hip and his belt was a crowbar, right behind it was a sledgehammer. I think it was the same hammer he had used on the Gargoyles that morning. A bit of what looked like dust from a stone was still stuck to one end.
On his back was a very large pack full of what I could only guess to be food and more survival gear. I noticed the pack's straps were tightened, it could expand to accommodate more objects. Attached to the bottom of Patches' giant backpack was a much smaller one, one sized for a regular pony.
He reached behind himself and pulled the second pack from the bottom of his first and handed it to me. It was the one I had left at his house.
"There you go, some water, food, and a few other tools and supplies in case we get separated," he said with a smile.
"What took you so long by the way?" I couldn't help but ask. I put my pack on and tightened the straps as much as I could, keeping the weight high and close.
"I remember this armor fitting better," he said as he quickly looked away and started walking in the direction of the nest.
I heard that tone in his voice that made me think he was lying, but it also sounded a fair bit like embarrassment. Maybe he was faking it?
"Is Patches getting faaaat?~" I asked in a singsong tone, feeling a massive grin spreading across my face. Having seen him stark naked that morning I knew he was far from fat but I figured some teasing might get the truth out of him.
He looked over his shoulder making a mock pouting face. "No..." His eyes quickly shifted side-to-side. "You... You be quiet and stop saying things like that... I'm flawless," he said as he turned his nose up and away from me and let out a snort like some kind of Canterlot elite snob.
"I dunno, I didn't want to say anything but I'm starting to notice some jiggle in your step," I continued my assault, chuckling a fair bit.
"Ok you saw me naked, I'm better-looking than you!" He had stopped walking and turned to point at me.
"Oh so now we're gonna make this a contest about looks when you can't even be on time?!" My voice rose unintentionally as victory drew near.
"Aaaahaaauuuaaah! See?! I knew this was some convoluted mindgame of yours to try to get me to spill the beans about why I'm-fuck..." He drooped, knowing he'd been caught.
"So what's the real reason for your tardiness?" I asked, leaning forward with a triumphant grin.
He huffed and let out a sigh, looking at me with that 'I'm so fucking fed-up with you already' look. "You're really not gonna drop it are you?"
I slowly shook my head, never letting my smile falter nor my eyes off his face.
"Fine, Daisy and Bryon caught me undressing so I got one last good fuck in before I hit the road. There you happy? You know about my sex life and how much better than yours it is," he crossed his arms over his chest as he finished his little taunt. He was clearly trying to twist his loss into a win, maybe a tie.
"Yes I'm glad I can trust you to be honest with me after I grill you a little," I said with a chuckle as I brushed past him to continue through the woods.
We continued along through the woods for over an hour, mostly going uphill and winding around various obstacles. Patches had this odd compulsion to pull on damn near every fern we passed, yanking one of the branches from it, playing with it a little, and dropping it. Was he leaving a trail on purpose or was he just that starved for stimulation? I settled on the latter option when he started eating one of the fern branches and ignored the next few dozen of the plants. Patches you great, big, absent-minded thing.
"By the way, how fucking far away is this place?" I asked as we rounded the hill's edge only to be greeted with the sight of a small shallow valley and several more sloping hills beyond it. Each mound of earth was heavily wooded and I couldn't make out a building anywhere. The thick forest was definitely going to slow us down if we were going to continue on the ground to avoid detection.
"About a day's walk ohhhhhh," he trailed off, continuing to make that noise as he pointed his arm like a compass' needle. "That way," he said as he froze.
"So we'll be showing up around nightfall? When they're most dangerous?" I asked as we resumed. I decided to let Patches blaze a trail as he seemed set on walking in a straight line to our objective.
"Eh, we can stop and snugg-I mean make camp and rest on the other side of the last hill before the little factory town. That way we can recon in the morning and make our move at about high noon. If shit gets too crazy we can just fall back into the sunlight and fry any of them stupid enough to chase us that far," he said without looking back at me. He was a little preoccupied with swatting at the plants in his way.
I’ll skip the rest of the uneventful journey through the hills and trees, not much happened. Patches and I threw a couple pinecones at each other, he chased a frog and I had to catch him, Patches handed me an old-looking destroyed bird’s nest and before I could ask why he gave it to me I got attacked by an angry crow… Yeah, a grand old time with this one.
We crested the final hill maybe an hour before sunset, looking down into another shallow valley I could see the small factory town. None of the buildings had the tall smokestacks I often thought of when people mentioned factories, no wonder I never spotted anything during our trip. There were four large buildings surrounded by fencing on the outskirts of the town that had to be the factories, there was a significant amount of logging equipment near them.
“Lumber mills, makes sense,” I murmured as my eyes scanned the rest of the town.
There were maybe twenty houses off the main road and one larger building that had to be a market. There were a few other buildings dotting the area but without closer inspection there was no way to tell what they were. My eyes slowly scanned back to the factories.
“Which one is the nest in?” I whispered.
“That one,” he said quietly as he pointed toward the building closest to the hill, the back end had collapsed partway. Rubble had spilled into the forest and knocked a tree over. For just a moment I saw a bit of movement among the rubble and ducked.
“You do that during your escape?” I asked as we turned and started back down the opposite end of the hill. We went a few hundred feet down the back of the hill and stopped to make camp.
“I might have knocked something over, but I don’t think I made that big of a hole in the wall,” Patches said as he dropped his pack and sat on a fern, he seemed to be targeting the poor plants.
I set my own pack down and let out a sigh, realizing how draining the hike had been. A drink of water and a snack helped. Patches offered part of the fern he was mangling, I decided if he favored the things so much they had to be at least half-decent. It was not the tastiest thing.
“I thought you were used to eating crummy tasting things,” Patches teased at my grimace, a half-eaten fern branch in his hand.
“How can you stomach this stuff?” I asked as I tossed my piece away, resting my head on my pack. As close as we were to the nest a fire was definitely a bad idea.
He chuckled and smiled, twisting a fern’s branch in his hand. “You know, I’m not really sure. At some point along the line I just started liking them,” he looked off at the sky. The sun was nearly gone, painting the clouds red and orange.
“Think it’s gonna rain?” I asked, gesturing toward the clouds that seemed to be building and slowly stretching farther across the sky.
“Nah, sun’s going down. They’re gonna weaken and dissipate as it cools off tonight. If they don’t dissipate, they won’t have enough energy to rain, as long as they don’t hit a particularly steep hill that is, then the orographic lift could be enough to cause a light shower but most of these clouds are pretty thin,” he answered with far more information than I needed.
“So fifty-fifty?” I asked, mocking my forecaster.
“Oh hush. You should get some rest, I’ll take first watch tonight,” he said as he rose and stretched his wings.
“Alright, wake me in a few hours, you need rest too,” I said as I looked at my pack with a sigh. I didn’t feel like unpacking anything from my bag so I just layed down and used the sleeping bag rolled up on the bottom of it as a pillow.
My body may have been tired, but my mind definitely wasn’t. It was almost like it was waiting for me to lay down to rest so it could haunt me with new and old images. I was back in that damned desert again, the team of specialists sent into the tunnels to hunt a Queen down and put her to the sword.
It was more like a whole squad, there were twelve of us down there. Two demolition specialists to collapse any tunnel or chamber necessary to cover our advance or escape, two navigational specialists to keep us from getting lost in the literal maze of tunnels, and eight combat specialists to keep the other four safe.
We walked in a staggered column, two combat specialists in the front, a navigation specialist behind them, the two demolition specialists were in the middle of the formation with four combat specialists guarding them and the packages they carried, the second navigation specialist behind them, and two combat specialists guarding the rear of the formation. The columns were at least twenty meters long, I was the front left guard of the demolitions group.
Our progress through the tunnels seemed to get slower and slower the further we advanced. Every time we stopped at a new chamber there were more tunnels leading out of it than the previous one. Some of the tunnels went straight down, since every Changeling could fly, it wasn’t a hazard to them. To the three Earth Ponies in our group however, a fall was a death sentence if a Pegasus couldn’t catch them in time.
We stopped in the center of another deserted chamber, the front Nav Spec lit his horn up and scanned the tunnels. His expression rapidly changed to one of fear as he stopped his scanning spell, instead using his magic to draw his telekinetic blade. A double-ended weapon without a handle, a weapon only a Unicorn could handle properly. “They’re coming,” was all he said, his voice barely above a whisper as the echoes of wings and the clatter of chitin against stone seemed to come from every tunnel pouring into the chamber. Even the tunnel behind us was flooded with the noise.
It wasn’t long before the faint echoes were overwhelmingly loud, sets of glowing green eyes filled the dark tunnels as dozens, no hundreds of Changelings poured into the chamber like water.
Our column rapidly collapsed and condensed into a circle, the eight combat specialists surrounding the other four. The Nav Specs were both armed with telekinetic blades and sent them dancing through the tides of advancing Changelings, carving effortlessly through them. Both of the Demo Specs were lobbing destructive spells into the mass, setting dozens of Changelings on fire at once. Their chitin hissed and popped as the water in their skin boiled.
Violet Rustwing was on this mission as well, and I was glad to have an archer as skilled as her on the mission. Her arrows were directed at airborne Changelings charging their magic up for offensive spells. Any she missed had their spells blocked or deflected by Sugar Burst. I always thought he had an odd name, but he was damn good at his job and a respectable unicorn in my book.
Any of the Changelings that made it into melee range were quickly dispatched as well, and a worrying number made it past the onslaught of destruction magic and telekinetic blades.
“We gotta charge up!” One of the Unicorns shouted as the fireballs stopped raining on the Changelings, allowing several more of them to reach us. Claws and fangs found my armor as I worked my blades relentlessly into the swarm of angry Changelings. No matter how many we felled, more continued over their fallen comrades. If they were being this persistent we must have been getting close to the Queen’s chamber.
“Hit the deck!” I didn’t hesitate, I dove forward onto the ground as a massive wave of destruction magic tore through the room. The intense heat melted everything in its path, it scorched the walls and crept up the spherical chamber to the ceiling. It burned so hot the Changelings in the tunnels beyond the chamber burst into flame, their screams echoed throughout the structure.
The only thing keeping us safe from the massive wall of flame was a small bubble, a shield spell. I had never been so happy to see one in my entire life. The flames continued to roll around the chamber as if they were alive and searching for something else to consume. They eventually poured into the tunnels to cleanse them of life as well, eventually leaving nothing behind but an eerie fiery glow.
The shield spell flickered and died, exposing us to the toxic air and recently burned stone. The floor was almost unbearably hot after the flames had torn through the chamber, the air was so thin we nearly suffocated before more spells were cast to filter the air and make it breathable again.
“What the fuck kind of spell was that?!” I demanded between coughs as the air quality slowly improved. “If it weren’t for the shield we would have been consumed by that fire as well and the mission would have been a failure!”
“We had it under control,” the shorter demolitionist answered. “Would you rather have died trying to hold them all off and had the mission fail anyway?”
“He’s right Alex, they were a mistake or a small opening in our defenses away from tearing our circle to pieces,” Violet said. “Is anyone hurt?” She asked as she turned back to the group.
“Just a few scratches and cuts, nothing major got through, thankfully,” said one of the navigation specialists after looking the last fighter over.
“Then form back up and get a move on!” I barked. “If they’re trying that hard to stop us we have to be close, the Queen will only be vulnerable for another hour or so!”
After a loud confirmation from the team, the column reformed itself and we pressed onward, deeper into the labyrinth. Little did we know, the Changelings were just getting started with their resistance.
We were marching down one of the larger tunnels that lead to a chamber that had a tunnel that lead to the egg chamber where the Queen was supposed to be. According to our Nav Specs. It’s not that I didn’t believe them, but the Changelings were damn good at fooling us into thinking the upper hand right before they took the floor out from under us. Which is exactly what they did.
Wake Trosselhoof the Fifth, an Earth pony, the youngest in our group at a strapping 21 years. He was the son of some rich farmer and next in line to inherit the family’s estate. He could have done anything with his life, with the kind of money his family had. His dad supported every decision he made, except when he decided to join the military.
“If’n I’m gonna spend mah entire laif sittin’ on m’ ass doin’ diddly-squat laike m’ paw, I’monna earn it!” He said with the thickest accent when we all questioned his decision to join instead of taking the easy road through life that had already been paved for him.
Truth be told I really hated ponies who had their entire life handed to them on a platter. Spoiled, soft, weak. He was none of that, he rejected that entire lifestyle, knew what it would do to him. He wanted to be more than his father, wanted to be better, and I had nothing but respect for him for choosing the difficult path when nobody expected him to. Even when his own family tried to stop him from taking that path, he still took it.
It’s a path that comes naturally to a Rustwing, a path we’re expected to take, a path that can often lead to an early death. Many of us take it without a second thought, marching dutifully into Death’s maw to kick its teeth out. We’re so used to it that the pride of walking said path is ingrained in our family. In spite of making it to a position as an elite fighter, something to be truly proud of, Wake was one of the most humble ponies I had ever met.
He didn’t deserve to die. I felt that way about everyone I served with, but on that day his death hit me harder than most. Maybe it was the suddenness of it all. Maybe it was the way the ground just crumbled beneath the middle of the column without so much as a rumble or errant scratch beneath us as a warning. Maybe it was the expression on his face as I grabbed the demolition specialist instead of him. His arms outstretched, his palms open, the panic in his eyes, the way his scream faded as he fell into the darkness… Into the waiting jaws of the Changeling masses below. His eyes fading into the sea of glowing green. I think it’s a combination of everything that happened in that very moment that make it haunt me to this day.
He knew what he signed up for as an escort, to be willing to die for one of the navigational or demolition specialists. Maybe he thought by being with such an elite group of fighters and being as skilled as he was he’d make it through this mission. Maybe he thought it would be better for him to die than one of his fellow soldiers. Maybe he knew he was going to die, just not how. The fact that I’ll never know why he chose to go on the suicide mission bothers me more than I can describe.
I dropped the Demo specialist a few feet from the chasm and dove back in for Wake. Only to crash into a writhing mass of Changelings. They were blocking the way, trying to divide the group and make us easier to kill.
An exceptionally large soldier pounced on me, grabbed my arms and pinned me to the ground, easily overwhelming my strength. “Alex, wake the fuck up,” it hissed. I continued struggling as it shook me and repeated its orders.
A slap across my face pulled me back into the dark forest in the middle of the night. I was panting, my heart hammering in my chest as I looked around for the threat.
Patches was holding my shoulders, even in my large shoulder pauldrons, they only just filled his palms. He was looking at me with a worried expression that I could just barely make out in the nearly starless night. The clouds had definitely overrun most of the sky, so a few hours had passed.
“Hey, not to interrupt your pleasant dreams that you were sharing with the entire forest but,” he leaned in closer, still whispering. “I spotted two vamps, I think they noticed us spying on them earlier, and your shouting didn’t help us hide,” he hissed.
“Shit…”
Author's Note
I can't believe I got another chapter out so quickly! I've just felt really inspired and want to get it all out you know? Stay tuned for part two of Raiding Party! Coming out... Ohhhh... Sometime next week (8-14 days?) I'm gonna be at the rifle range every day of THIS week and I gotta get up at [REDACTED] so I can go to the armory at [REDACTED] and take a bus to the range so we can wait like two hours for the other armory to open up, so we can get our rifles, then wait for the sun to rise so we can shoot at our targets.
-Jake
We noticed some OPSEC violations in this comment and censored them for you Jake, you're welcome.
-ONI
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