Author's Note

I forgot I even had this.

The story I Should Stop Watching... had been in my head for quite some time before I put it to paper. While I still kept the general feeling, take this installment as why consulting others is a good idea no matter what the content. I've had a bad run of luck in terms of editors, so I had gotten into the habit of not using them at all. This is, at least for me, a terrible idea.

Grimm and Softy8088 managed to show me that while what I had certainly had some promise, it was still lacking, and thus I took a few more days to tighten it up. By result it became significantly longer, but i believe the quality jumped by a reasonable amount. This chapter of the Journal is here to show you just how an outside opinion can change a story. If you have read ISSW, you're not missing much if you don't want to read this chapter, but I'm posting it for the posterity.

I Should Stop Watching (Original Draft) - [Fluttershy] [Rainbow Dash] [Twilight] [BDSM] [Hate Sex] [Voyeurism]

For the third time, some nagging thought in the back of Fluttershy’s mind prevented her from just opening the door and rushing to their aid. She could hear the two of them at it again. She had hoped to catch Twilight alone so they could have a private chat without being interrupted. That wasn’t going to happen anymore.

She had flown up to the large gold balcony that almost doubled as Twilight’s courtyard, the go-to entrance for most winged visitors. She liked crystals well enough, and the castle was a nice enough home fit for a princess, but she preferred the cool earth under her hooves anyday. Still, she was happy Twilight had a home now that her precious library was destroyed.

She could hear muffled yells coming from within. Did Twilight do something to Rainbow again? She held a hoof to her chin in thought. She knew not to say anything about it, but did Twilight perhaps ask Rainbow if she dyed her mane her signature rainbow color? That was always a touchy subject in flight school that made her beat up the colts. Maybe Rainbow did something to one of Twilight's special books?

More importantly, why was she even here? It was close to nighttime, and Rainbow Dash always went to sleep early. Twilight, counter to Rainbow, was always up far past the witching hour; the two had almost opposite sleeping schedules. The double doors opened without so much as a squeak, revealing a large, empty corridor. Twilight still hadn’t gotten around to furnishing most of the place. The shouting had gotten louder; definitely two ponies.

Fluttershy had taken but a few steps before she turned back and closed the courtyard door. “No need to get drafty.” Her hooves clip-clopped across the granite floors, following the sound of bickering. Twilight’s yell was easily distinguishable, as the hard crystal walls made screams carry. The abrasive return shouts undoubtedly belonged to Rainbow Dash. Fluttershy winced as she heard something fragile break. At least it was someone she knew and Rwilight was not alone with some stranger.

The arguments were the reason she was here. Well, discussing it with Twilight was, anyway. She and Rainbow Dash had been fighting off and on for weeks now. They hadn’t let their little squabbles spill over into the public, but the tension was there regardless. Fluttershy and the others would come to a group picnic or meeting and find Rainbow and Twilight already there and neck-deep in another spat. Then came the smiles and the apologizing, always constant assurances that nothing was wrong. Something was indeed wrong with their relationship and had been for some time.

Screwing up her courage, Fluttershy approached the new living room Twilight had made. She put her hoof on the handle.

It was locked.

Of course...

“Come on, Rainbow!” Twilight shouted from the other side of the door. Yup, they were fighting again. Now was the time to help her friends. Twilight was always so willing to help her if she had a problem, and Rainbow Dash was her very first and bestest friend. They shouldn’t be fighting!

Fluttershy almost knocked on the door before she stopped herself. Twilight had said that the castle was open to her at all hours, but she wanted to find out why Rainbow Dash was here.

“Geez, get off my back.”

She could hear Twilight huff angrily. “I’ve had two homes here in Ponyville and I let you sleep over whenever you wish. Is it too much to ask you to clean up after yourself?”

“You know, who helped you move in here in the first place? Put this here, find this and put it here, no that’s in the wrong place so put it over here, here’s food but clean up everything while I take a shower; I’m not your fucking slave! Yeah, nice pad, Twi. I hope you have fun moving in by yourself next time around. Helping you move in, mind you, because you asked me to for both your houses. Knowing your luck I give this place a year before it turns into a crater. I’m tired, so back off!”

Ah, so that was it, at least this time around. Well Rainbow Dash could be a bit of a slob at times. More than once when she was in trouble at home, Rainbow was to blame, which resulted in no end of teasing by Fluttershy’s mother. It always took a while to wash her extra dishes and clean up the mess Rainbow left behind, but Fluttershy didn’t mind. Rainbow was always fun to have over, despite what mother always said about grandchildren immediately after when it came to her friendship with Rainbow.

Still, it was nice of Rainbow Dash to help Twilight move despite her busy weather schedule. Twilight could cut her a little slack, especially since she invited her friend over.

“This isn’t a one time thing!” Twilight shouted. “Do you ever clean up after yourself? Do you know how many times you’ve crashed into bookshelves back when I lived at Golden Oak? After a while I started to keep count.”

“Twi, I believe you,” came the acidic reply. “Everything’s constantly routine and numbers and stuff to you! Trips, your bro’s wedding, Winter Wrap-Up, everything. You keep talking about how the rest of us are so important to you yet you really have no idea how we think, do you!? You know, perhaps we don’t want to be reminded every single Celestia-forsaken time we fuck up! You kinda sound like an uptight brat when you keep trying to force us to see your way and don’t even care seeing it ours. Yeah, keep rubbing your friends faces in their failures; that will teach them. That’s not hurtful to hear at all. Just how long have you had that silver spoon in your mouth, ordering around ponies in Canterlot to do whatever you want? We’re not your servants, Sparklebutt. Stop treating us like dogs every time we do something you don’t like.”

What was wrong with them? This was completely different from their previous fights. At least then they managed to keep it under control, but was this how they acted behind closed doors? How many shouting matches like this had they gotten into when nopony was around? Were they hurting so bad that this was the only way they could deal with those issues, or was something else the culprit?

Even though the six of them had only been friends for a couple of years, the impact of their time together had left such an impression on Fluttershy that it felt like a lifetime. She couldn’t imagine a life in the quiet town of Ponyville without the rambunctiousness of their adventures. Twilight, a little awkward, was one of the nicest ponies she knew. Rainbow was still her oldest and most faithful friend that followed her here after Flight School. They’d faced all kinds of trials and tribulations together, unsung horrors and monsters from across the land.

How could it get this bad? Was she truly so blind to the troubles in her friend’s hearts that she could be blindsided so badly? Perhaps the very times she looked so fondly upon was their undoing in the first place. Anger and jealousy could become cancerous if masked by a blind desire to see only the good things.

Fluttershy couldn’t stop the bile rising in her throat and she did her best to swallow it down. If her friends were beginning to hate each other, it made a twisted sort of sense they wouldn’t tell her. It was to keep what precious sense of normalcy they had, to hold what friends still remained. Even if that meant keeping her in the dark. For Twilight she didn’t agree for doing so, but understood. Fluttershy always had a weak constitution and accepted that. She was used to other ponies hiding the truth from her in certain matters knowing how she wouldn’t be able to take it, how she may very well agonize over small slights and insignificant details.

Fluttershy could feel the waterworks coming and the tightness in her chest. Over the course of Rainbow’s rant what she had heard steady pounding, only to discover her own hyperventilating breaths. That didn’t even matter to her. Rainbow. Twilight she understood, yet Rainbow hid this from her? Her oldest friend who followed her to this quiet town? Twilight simply didn’t know better, but Rainbow knew very well how much this would hurt her. Why keep this a secret for so long? Was she waiting until the levy broke and the remaining four were drowned in the aftermath of hurt feelings? That wasn’t loyalty to her friends, that was desperation to retain them as long as possible.

Fluttershy knocked on the door. “G-girls?” came her plaintive plea after she fought down a hickup of misery. It was no use as Twilight was only just getting started and drowned her out.

“If you’d get your head out of the metaphorical clouds for once you’d realize just how blatantly hypocritical you’re being. Not everything’s about you! I can deal with these things on my own but what I don’t sympathize with is your irritating attempts to gain sympathy and glory over such benign tasks. If you can’t help out every now and then, that’s fine, but stop with this holier-than-thou peacocking that you deserve better. Not realizing how others think? You should take a look at yourself Dashie. Perhaps living like a slob and destroying your friends property is fine in your book but your friends have stopped tolerating your “accidents” after the third or fourth time.”

Twilight’s words were cut off with a loud thump. Fluttershy’s ears twitched as she heard the sound of shattered parchment and breaking glass Then came another thud and a series of ruffling noises, followed by several grunts.

“Get off me!”

“Girls!” Fluttershy shouted out of reflex. It didn’t help in the slightest as the pair of them were occupied in their scuffle. She tried the door once more. The lock rattled but the sound was was overridden by the noise of the fight in the adjacent room. She banged on the door but it was no use.

There had to be a way in. There had to. Her friends were fighting each other. How to get in? She certainly wasn’t strong enough to shoulder the door open.

An idea struck her: outside! She knew the castle well enough to know there was a small balcony on the other end of the living room. With a little luck it might be open.

Fluttershy scampered back down the glossy floors as quick as she could. For a brief moment she lost her footing and slipped onto her face. Shaking it off, she returned to the courtyard and with a great unfurling of her feathers she took to the air. After about a quarter of the way around the tree she found the right door. That too was closed, but Fluttershy froze just a moment before despair ate through her. She could see the lock in place, but the door wasn’t quite shut all the way; Twilight didn’t shut it correctly before locking it.

Fluttershy knickered in glee at finding a way in. With a light push the door noiselessly swung open. The living room had to be Twilight’s new study. The few salvaged couches and tables from Golden Oak decorated the room, including a pile of cushions Twilight let her guests sit on while entertaining them. A few white oak bookshelves covered some of the walls, some of the titles she recognized from the old library. Wedged into the far corner was a large oak desk, everything placed exactly as her old house had it. The acrid smell of smoke and earth wafted slightly in the air, an ever-present reminder of Golden Oak’s fate.

“Girls, please! Stop fighting and uuuuuuuuuuuuah...”

As stupid as drawing out that first syllable sounded, her brain had locked up and refused to comprehend what she was seeing.

They were kissing.

Rainbow Dash had Twilight pinned underneath her, a hoof in her back with a vicious snarl on her face. Twilight looked equally livid and her wings spasmodically flailed against her captor. She wasn’t sure they even realized she was there, let alone heard her cry of protest.

They were kissing.

With a foreleg putting Twilight in a headlock, Rainbow had wrenched the princess back at an uncomfortable angle to meet her in a rough but deep kiss. Twilight’s look of fury did little to show that she was trying little to resist. Her earlier despair had finally pushed out some of the tears yet her surprise was so great she didn’t even notice.

They were kissing.

As quietly as she could, eyes glued to the scene before her with a prayer to Celestia to bleach the image away, Fluttershy closed the door again, careful not to accidentally engage the lock.

Why were her friends kissing? They were arguing, and then immediately kissing.

What was going on?

Her thoughts were interrupted by another thud, and Fluttershy cracked the door to see what was going on. Twilight had managed to toss Rainbow Dash off and pawed at the ground angrily. Fluttershy was watching for the stirrings of a spell, but that was quickly stopped by a tackle from Rainbow Dash. The angry pair tumbled about until they managed to come to a stop at the base of a dresser.

Despite the attack, it was Twilight who came out on top. Rather than try her magic she instead managed to get on Rainbow’s back and hold on for dear life. Said pegasus started to get up.

“Uhh!” she cried out. Fluttershy wasn’t sure if it was a cry of pain or a squeak of arousal. Twilight had bitten Rainbow’s ear, but a wide smile was on her face. Next, Twilight continued to tease her pegasus friend by playing with her wings. She used a soft, little stroke to caress the feathers, all the while her hind leg descended and proceeded to grind itself into... oh.

“Oh my.” Fluttershy felt her cheeks flush and the start of a fire kindle in her loins. Just what kind of relationship was this? She had expected anger or friendship, each separated by some personal disagreement between the two mares, not... whatever this was. What kind of perverts were her friends?

“What’s the matter? Does my little tramp have oversensitive wings?” Twilight taunted. Rainbow once again tried to get up but Twilight was one step ahead of her by planting a hoof on her feathers. If Rainbow tried to rise there was a real chance that she’d pull one out by the base.

Fluttershy was torn on whether to try and step in. They were fighting, but at the same time, if the kiss was any indication and with Twilight’s behavior, they were almost enjoying it. What kind of deviants were they to take pleasure in tearing each other’s throat out?

Something else interrupted her thoughts: from the room slowly getting destroyed came a distinct, musky aroma. She almost didn’t smell it with the heat and sweat permeating the room from her friend’s battle, but now she was hit by a wave of it and backpedaled a little bit.

It was more than just enjoying hurting each other, they were getting aroused!

Love and romance was supposed to be a caring, gentle affair. Despite her own nethers moistening up a little, seeing something sexual like kissing and getting aroused by proxy was natural. But this... Fluttershy had no idea what to think about this.

Despite the jokes Rainbow occasionally made about her, sometimes with her in the same room or to her face, she wasn’t alien to the pleasures of the flesh. There were times when she had decided to rub one out or use her one, solitary toy to assist her. It was natural, and an animal caretaker new better than most about an active sex drive.

That was nothing more than sexual release, a byproduct of need every mare or stallion faced. This... this was debauchery! What kind of sadists were these two were they wanted to hurt each other with hooves and words only to violently start making out?

Fluttershy struggled to understand what was going on before one of them spoke. Rainbow’s angry expression was momentarily twinged with a smirk and she said, “Twi, remind me to teach you how to swear.”

Fluttershy stood there, stunned. She was enjoying it. By Celestia, Rainbow was enjoying her treatment at the hooves of Twilight. The sheer carnal outrage, the massive burst of emotion followed by sexual release. It was all a game to the two of them. A twisted, messed up game.

A shudder darted through Fluttershy and with the deepest shame she felt the familiar burning of arousal spike. This wasn’t love. This wasn’t tender. This wasn’t how it was supposed to happen. If she had caught them in a touching embrace, perhaps even in each other’s thighs, it would have made sense. Why were they hurting each other? And why couldn’t she stop watching?

Twilight was still grinding herself into Rainbow’s nethers. Fluttershy couldn’t see the fruits of her labor but she certainly did see the wet rivulets running down her leg. Twilight was in control, mostly because Rainbow didn’t look like she wanted to fight anymore. If it came to a battle of strength, the pegasus would easily win, and a battle of magic would declare Twilight the winner by default. But Twilight hadn’t used magic. That was odd.

Fluttershy moved her hind legs back and forth to help alleviate the discomfort she was feeling. She shouldn’t be watching, that she knew, but she just couldn’t help herself. Despite the raw violence it was something she had to see, to understand. Take a mate, get married, live a long and happy life together; that was how it worked.

And yet what made this relationship tick? No, that wasn’t the right question. Why hadn’t she ran away screaming, or demanded an explanation? There was just something about the two of them together, writhing and moaning like primal animals lost to their instincts. Maybe it was just the siren call of taboo, but she couldn't deny the effect it had on her. This was something vile. It was pure unabashed emotion laid bare and oh, gosh, she was getting wet. Already she could feel her pulse quickening as the two of them screwed each other senseless. One trickle of her own excitement slid down her leg, sending a thrill through her body as her own increasing arousal cut through her shame.

“I’m going to fuck you like the arrogant little harlot you are.” Fluttershy almost missed the words Twilight whispered. Rainbow only smiled, whether at the challenge or Twilight sounding uncomfortable swearing Fluttershy didn’t know. Rainbow Dash adjusted herself to buck off her rider, but Twilight held firm with the hoof on her feathers. The princess bit the back of Rainbow’s neck.

Rainbow didn’t scream. She moaned.

The abuse continued as Twilight dominated her friend, although Fluttershy wasn’t even sure she could call it abuse if Rainbow Dash was enjoying it as much as she seemed. Panting and cheeks flushed, Rainbow had leaned down with her rear raised in the traditional mating display. Rather than letting Rainbow continue to enjoy her ministrations, Twilight moved her limb away as she lined up her crotch with Rainbow’s tail and thrust herself into the soft hairs.

Rainbow wasn’t just taking it, she was getting off on it. As Twilight thrust her folds against her tail, Rainbow followed suit by rocking herself back to match her rhythm. Satisfied that her target was no longer going to rebel against her, Twilight stopped pinning Rainbow and instead grasped her barrel with both forelegs, wrapping her in a tight grip to better leverage her thrusts against Rainbow.

It wasn’t like Rainbow was willing to fight her anyway; she too had fluids running down her legs, although now that she thought about it, Fluttershy assumed that they might be Twilight’s just as much as they might be Rainbow’s. Again and again she timed herself to Twilight’s humping as a slow trail of drool dripped from her lolling tongue. As a slow stream of grunts and whispered curses of delight babbled through her lips as Twilight’s pace picked up.

“Ughhh... fuck!” Rainbow exclaimed. She wasn’t even touching herself. Not even Twilight was bothering with returning the favor, and yet Rainbow Dash, prized flyer of the Wonderbolts, was getting off at being turned into Twilight’s bottom bitch. Fluttershy could feel herself winking as her own neglected lips begged for some attention. She couldn’t, not that she wanted to stave off the urges anyway. She wanted to see this. Her eyes were glued to the debauchery and wanted—no—needed to see the conclusion. She closed her hind legs tight and rubbed her thighs together to try and hopefully stave off the burning. Goddesses knewows she might just abandon trying to reason with the two and lock herself in her bathroom for some quiet time.

And that was when everything went wrong. Denying her rampant horniness or simply trying to analyze what her friends were doing ceased being the centerpiece of her goals as the worst happened. Rainbow, lost to the world in pleasure, was rising to her own peaek of ecstasy as she squirmed on the floor. She was moving so much that in her writhing, her eyes ventured to the supposedly locked door Fluttershy was peeking through to where she saw Fluttershy the Peeping Tom.

Fluttershy’s Her heart froze. Here she stood, frozen at the door, almost masturbating herself to her friend’s private time. Maybe arguing time; she still wasn’t sure. Was thatis foreplay to them?

The thoughts rushed through her mind in an attempt to find a solution, to desperately explain to her oldest friend why she was there watching them have sex while she watched like some sick voyeur. She could see the lust slowly lift from Rainbow’s mind as if each slapping thrust coming from Twilight was fucking sense right back into her horny mind. Then came the surprise, and the realization. Fluttershy felt like a knife was being thrown at her as Rainbow took in a breath.

She winked.

Fluttershy’s wings immediately spread in a wide, painful fear boner. Rainbow laid her head back on the ground, still humming and grunting as Twilight had her way with her. Twilight, still locked onto Rainbow’s neck, didn’t see the silent exchange. Rainbow smile widened as Fluttershy didn’t look away, run, scream, or hide behind several small rocks.

She wanted to be watched.

“Come on, Sparklebutt, is that how you fuck a mare? Do I have to get on top and show you how it’s done?” Rainbow taunted. She was still looking at Fluttershy with a dreamy look on her face.

Of course. Rainbow always had one hell of an ego. Now she had an audience.

Rainbow hissed as Twilight bit down harder before releasing her. “Today’s my turn, Rainbow Bitch.” And with that she gave another particularly vicious thrust that caused Rainbow’s legs to buckle under the strain.

“And you kiss your mother with that mouth, egghead?” Rainbow giggled. “Although I wouldn’t mind seeing you get railed by that hunky brother of yours. He and I can share your hot ass all night.”

Well, she was putting on a show alright. After just a few more thrusts against Rainbow Dash’s now dripping tail, Twilight released her hold on Rainbow’s neck and howled in pleasure as she released. Twilight’s hips thrust against Rainbow’s wet flank out of instinct, little spurts of feminine fluid dripping onto the floor in a small stream. With the look of satisfaction stretched across Rainbow’s smug face, Fluttershy could swear she climaxed along with her.

Twilight collapsed onto Rainbow’s back, exhausted from the whole ordeal. With her eyes closed, she looked about ready to sleep as she panted for breath. Rainbow turned to the little puddle of Twilight’s essence and, making sure her eyes were back on Fluttershy’s, she gave it a lick.

Fluttershy squeaked and all but forced a hoof into her mouth.

“You taste good, Sparkles.”

“Hmmm...” Twilight mumbled back. Rainbow walked to where the two had set, or quite possibly thrown in anger, several of the room’s cushions hours prior, . Rainbow got to her knees and slowly slide Twilight down upon them.

Despite being on her back and looking ready for sleep, Rainbow wasn’t done with her. She opened Twilight’s forelegs to gaze at her prize. Twilight mumbled something but Fluttershy couldn’t hear it from where she was hidingat. The unicorn’sShe could see her fur was glazed in a thick layer of fluid. Rainbow made sure to shake her rear in Fluttershy’s direction before letting their nether lips meet in a delicate thrust.

“Rainbow, I’m a little sore,” Twilight moaned.

The pegasus didn’t respond with a quip, but gave Twilight a rather tender lick across the face. “It’s fine; I’ll be gentle.”

With that Rainbow started to grind herself against Twilight to sate her own ravenous need for release. Gone was the usual violence and now she was soft and careful with the exhausted mare beneath her. She was no doubt already close to release after her earlier treatment and soon she too was grunting like before with a swiftly approaching climax. Her eyes kept darting back to Fluttershy’s crack in the door. No, she wouldn’t have left. Now Fluttershy wanted to see this concluded, but for entirely different reasons.

Rainbow met Twilight in a soft kiss. Twilight’s forelegs wrapped around her neck to hold it for as long as possible before she had to break away for breath.

“Are you close?”

Rainbow pecked her on the lips again as she ground her vagina into Twilight’s. “Yes.”

Rainbow was panting and her thrusts were getting shorter. It was like she was in pain and getting off was the only way to release the pressure. The sound of her slapping thighs, the cocktail of arousal and sweat was making Fluttershy heady. The call to relieve herself was almost unbearable. Already a small puddle had formed to attest to her need.

“I want to tell you something, Twi.” That woke Twilight up. She snapped to attention faster than Fluttershy could realize was possible, especially while getting fucked. For a moment she could see nervousness in her eyes that was slowly replacing the affection.

“What is it?”

Rainbow nibbled on Twilight’s ear, an act the mare didn’t seem to like nearly as much Rainbow did. “We have a visitor.”

With that Rainbow thrust her hips as hard as she could into Twilight’s cunt and held them there. Pinching her clit like that along with getting so worked up before had caused her own climax to burst forth with the strength of a hurricane. It was at that specific moment that Fluttershy discovered what the term squirter meant.

Twilight seemed confused at first, before she lookinged at the locked doorwaydoorway to see it locked. Looking the other direction, an act made more difficult due to the mare cumming on top of her, her eyes widened upon seeing Fluttershy huddled behind the door.

Twilight waited for Rainbow to finish her business. Rainbow seemed to want it done quickly as well for as she stopped painting Twilight’s midsection in her own fluids, she helped the mare to her hooves. She gave Twilight another affectionate lick as she saw Twilight had made the same discovery she did.

“You’re clingy after sex,” Twilight said, although there was no malice in her voice. “Now, Fluttershy.”

Now her tone changed. Fluttershy squeaked and closed the door. Twilight just unlocked it with her magic and opened it as wide as it would go. Fluttershy was hit with the full force of their scent, a fact confirmed as Twilight walked out and saw Fluttershy’s puddle of shame where she had been standing moments ago.

“Fluttershy.” She must have seen what her words had done to her and made her tone much more gentle. Well, she was hyperventilating, fearful, and aroused beyond belief, but that was normal. The first two were normal anyway. Fluttershy had backpedaled to the railing and was looking out towards Ponyville, but her wings refused to open.

“Fluttershy,” she said softly. She turned toward her alicorn friend. There wasn’t anger in her eyes. Only concern. “I’m not mad.”

The burden didn’t lift from her chest and her panting increased. Everything was starting to sway

“Fluttershy, just close your eyes and take deep breaths. Everything will be okay.”

She did so. It took a good minute or two for her panic attack to subside, but it wasn’t the first she’d had and it certainly wouldn’t be the last. She opened her eyes to see a patiently waiting Twilight and a very smug Rainbow Dash.

“Sooooo...” she said, drawing out the syllable. “We got some explaining to do, don’t we?”

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