Royal Rivalry

by Flying Wingnut

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Luna, Comedy, Princess Celestia
Length: 1713

It's a normal day in Canterlot, until Celestia receives a package and goes to Luna. Then, all you-know-what breaks loose.

It's a normal day in Canterlot, until Celestia receives a package. She opens it, goes to Luna, then all you-know-what breaks loose as the entire castle is pulled into a sibling rivalry

In response to a half-hour challenge posted in the School for New Writers, posted by Darklordclomp

Prompt was "What's a little rivalry between sisters?"

Published 2014-01-31 06:10:05 UTC
Last updated 2014-01-31 06:10:05 UTC

What's a little rivalry between sisters?

It was a typical sunny day in the city of Canterlot. Shopkeepers peddled their wares, guards patrolled the streets, saying hello to passing ponies, tourists ogled the palace…it was business as usual in the city streets. Even the castle and it’s inhabitants were going about their daily business. Guards guarded doors, chefs prepared food, servants cleaned, and the princesses performed their daily duties. Yes, all was normal in the city atop the mountain...until Celestia received a package.

“Ah, finally, it is here!” She exclaimed as she grabbed the parcel from the mail mare, giving her a generous tip before closing her chamber doors and trotting to her table. She sat down and quickly unwrapped her box, throwing the scraps of paper and packaging to the side to reveal a brand new, canary-yellow-on-jet-black foam dart gun. She eyed her new not-so-deadly dart revolver with a smile on her face, opening the cylinder and spinning it with her magic. Quickly, she loaded six of the darts that came with it and spun around, snapping the cylinder in place and aiming it at the glass door to her balcony. She pulled the trigger and sent a dart flying through the air, placing it exactly where she intended to. She smirked and spun the gun before putting the barrel under her mouth and pretending to blow smoke from the barrel.

“Excellent…” She purred as she examined the gun once again. “Lulu won’t know what hit her.” She giggled and hid the gun behind herself before getting up from her seat and walking out of her chambers, ushering for her guards to follow as she made her way to Princess Luna’s chambers. She hid her giddy anticipation with her trademark calm and benevolent smile as she cantered gracefully through the hallways, hiding the gun in her ethereal mane, the faintest golden glow on her horn the only indication that she was using her magic. She walked for a few minutes before turning a corner and stopping, shocked, as she nearly ran into the princess of the night, flanked by her own guards.

“Our apologies, sister.” Luna said, a friendly smile on her face as she backed up a few steps. “We did not expect somepony to come around that corner.”

Celestia laughed softly and shook her head, returning her friendly smile. “Not your fault, Lulu. I was daydreaming.”

The two cast cursory glances over each other, silently looking eachother over for a few seconds. They both concluded in an instant that the other was hiding something behind their friendly smiles, and they noted each other's faintly glowing horns.

Luna smirked and flicked her tail in amusement. “We see you have received your package today…” She looked into Celestia’s eyes with an expression that said “We both know what’s going on here…”

Celestia looked shocked for a split second before chuckling and returning her own smirk. “Yes, I have. I take it you have as well?”

Luna simply nodded and shook her mane gently. The two princesses stared each other down in the hallway, their amused smirk never leaving their faces as they stood as still as statues, seeming to wait for the other to do something. They glared with the steely expression of cowponies preparing for a draw...appropriate, really, given the circumstances.

In an instant, Luna pulled something black and yellow out of her starry mane, something very familiar to the sun princess. Celestia immediately reacted, drawing her pistol from her mane and aiming it level with her sister’s head, staring down the barrel of the identical pistol her sister now held.

“Mmm, seems we both had the same idea, didn’t we, dear sister?” Celestia said, a tone of mock evil dripping off of her words.

“Indeed we did, dear sister.” Luna replied, matching her sister’s tone, getting into character for the little game they were about to play.

Their guards simply looked on in confusion, scratching their heads and gazing quizzically at the two princesses aiming toy pistols at each other, speaking as if they were about to engage in mortal combat. The two sisters never took their eyes off of each other, waiting for the other to make a move, waiting for one opening in the other’s defence.

“Guards!” Celestia said in a mock-authoritative tone. “Your princess requires aid in combat!” As she finished her sentence, two dart guns, identical to the princess’ chosen weapons, poofed into existence, one in front of either guard. They chuckled and took the guns, one in his magic, the other in his teeth, and aimed them at their lunar counterparts a small distance away. As they aimed, they noticed the lunar guards taking hold of their own guns, aiming at them. For what seemed like an eternity, they stood their, each pony aiming their weapons at the other, waiting for the other to initiate the engagement.

Without warning, Celestia lit her horn and engulfed herself and her guards in magic. They disappeared, only to reappear a few meters away. Luna matched her movements perfectly, teleporting herself and her guards a few meters away. Everypony took aim with their pistols and pulled the trigger, sending six foam darts soaring through the air towards their adversaries.

And so it began…

~---+---~

It was a typical sunny day in the city of Canterlot. Shopkeepers peddled their wares, guards patrolled the streets, saying hello to passing ponies, tourists ogled the palace…it was business as usual in the city streets. Inside the palace, however, was another story entirely. Inside the royal palace, hundreds upon hundreds of guardsponies feuded with each other, pitting Lunar against Solar in a fierce battle. Tables were flipped, barricades were formed, command posts were established, and an all out war broke out, littering the floors and walls of the palace with darts. Hundreds of guards laid “dead” on the floor, some writhing in “agony” as the desperately hoofed at their “wounds”.

Inside of the Solar command post, Celestia and the last of her battered and broken army huddled behind whatever cover they could as Luna and her army battered at what little of a barricade they had left. They held quite well, using the natural choke point that the sole entrance created to funnel the Lunar army into one pile, taking potshots over the barricade as they advanced, striking down enemy after enemy in a hail of foamy fire. Little by little, though, the Solar guards fell, collapsing to the ground as the Lunar guards made lucky shot after lucky shot as they advanced, pegging them as they popped out of cover to fire. Celestia could do nothing but watch as the last of her guard fell one by one, until she was the last of her army. She stood defiantly behind a table littered with maps and battle plans as she waited for Luna’s army to burst in and take her.

She aimed her pistol at the sole entrance to the room, her last six darts loaded into the cylinder as she watched the barricade bend and buckle as the Lunar guards slammed into it. Over and over they slammed, until it finally gave in and crumbled. As the Lunar guards poured in, Celestia fired her pistol with the calculated precision of a marksman, taking down one guard, then two, then three, and so on until the first six that entered laid “dead” on the ground, a dart clinging to their foreheads. She sighed, however, and resigned to her fate, putting the pistol down on the table and clenching her eyes shut as she heard the guns of the rest of the Lunar army firing at her, peppering the entire room in foamy death. Celestia stumbled back and crumpled up against the wall as her entire body was ravaged by the foamy onslaught. After a few seconds, they ceased fire, leaving the room littered with darts and “dead” guards. Princess Luna strolled into the room, smirking confidently as her guards trailed behind her. She gently rested a hoof on Celestia’s chest before turning to her guards and smiling triumphantly.

“We have seized this day!” She exclaimed, allowing the Royal Canterlot Voice to echo through the castle. “Solar guards, hear me now! Your princess lies dead! This day belongs to the Lunar Republic!”

Her guards cheered victoriously as she raised her hoof to the sky, yelling and cheering along with them. The echoes of cheering rushed through the halls, confirming the fears of any Solar troops left standing. They had lost. Victory belonged to the Lunar Republic.

Celestia snickered and opened her eyes, peering up at Luna with a friendly smirk. “Gee, dramatic, much?”

Luna simply giggled and took her hoof off of her sister’s chest, helping her to stand. As Celestia stood, the castle sprang to life again, with the dead guards standing back up and chuckling, talking and joking with each other as they cleaned up the mess from their “epic” battle.

“Next time, Lulu.” Celestia said as she walked out of the room. She looked back at Luna and casted a wink her way. “Next time.”

Luna chuckled and followed her out of the room, smiling warmly as she trotted up next to her sister. “You wish, Tia. That’s three weeks in a row.”

Celestia chuckled and casted a smirk her way as the walked side by side. “Yes, but that only means our comeback is going to be glorious!”

“And what if you don’t get a comeback?”

“Believe me, we will.”

“You haven’t yet, so what’s going to change?”

“You doubt me?”

“You haven’t given Us a reason not to.”

Celestia and Luna glared at each other for a few seconds before laughing and exchanging a friendly nuzzle. Celestia turned and cantered in the direction of her room, offering Luna a final smile. “Next week, then?”

Luna nodded and smiled as she turned away and begun trotting to her room. “Indeed, sister. Next week We shall crush you again!”

Celestia simply laughed as they parted ways, both of them wracking their minds, trying to come up with new strategies for their next “battle”.

“We’ll see about that, sister...we’ll see…”

Author's Note

Just a little challenge posted by The School for New Writers. Figured I'd give it a go.