Life is a Party

Chapters

Prologue: Dash's Birthaversary
1. A Desolate Pinkie
2. Recovery
3. Don't Leave

Prologue: Dash's Birthaversary

Author's Note

This is simply a recap of a section of the episode from which the story splits from canon. It's a bit of a reminder, but if you feel it's too redundant, please skip to the next chapter.

We begin mid-song, in which Cheese Sandwich has charmed the hearts of every partygoer in Ponyville. Pinkie Pie follows behind, desperately trying to get attention back to her party plans for Rainbow Dash's Birthaversary.

Prologue: Dash's Birthaversary

The super-duper party pony -- that pony is me! You'll never meet another party pony quite like Cheese!

Pinkie Pie tried to keep up with the crowd of ponies, singing and dancing with Cheese Sandwich, but it was to no avail. Her legs seemed to have given up any hope of redirecting the town's attention.

Oh, when I throw a Cheese party, be sure to not be lame

And miss my pie fights, wacky kites, and streamers in your mane

Fizzy drinks, Hawaiian shirts, and brie fondue delight

You know that with Cheese Sandwich, you'll be partying all night!

Pinkie put on a million kilowatt smile to try and catch Rainbow Dash's eye. Surely, her friend wouldn't abandon her for this pony who appeared out of nowhere! Pinkie had been secretly planning Dash's party for weeks! Surely, even Dash knew that Pinkie had been putting extra effort into her Birthaversary... right?

Then Pinkie found herself being trampled by the group of ponies who had been following Cheese Sandwich around like puppies. Eyes wide, she took a deep breath and got to her hooves, staring in disbelief after the multitudes.

"C'mon, everypony!" the pegasus in question shouted. "Let's party down with Cheese!"

Pinkie's eyes might have bulged right out of her head. There was Dash, encouraging everypony to follow Cheese!

"You're really a certified party pony?" Fluttershy asked quietly, barely able to contain the grin on her face.

"That's right!" Cheese affirmed. "That's my guarantee! The super-duper party pony -- that pony is me-e-e-e-e!"

The mob of excited townsfolk lifted Cheese Sandwich into the air and started to carry him away, no doubt to spirit him away to the land of sweet cakes and pies for party planning. Pinkie's mane wilted at the thought of the stallion getting sweets for Dash's party without her. She lifted a hoof, hoping that, somehow, it would be enough for her friends to see.

"But what about the super party pony named Pinkie...?" she asked their backs, tears forming in her eyes.

Wallowing in despair, there was only one little ball of hope floating in her chest. Maybe, if she could speak loudly enough, Dash and the rest of her friends would see her, smiling and waiting for the chance to throw a super duper party! Yeah, that would definitely work!

Pinkie trotted after the group, plastering her signature grin on her face. She opened her mouth to call after Dash, but it clicked shut as the cyan pegasus's voice reached her sensitive ears.

"I mean, Pinkie Pie's parties are fun and sweet and all, but this party's going to be..."

"Epic?" Cheese suggested, grinning widely.

"You said it!" Dash answered, doing a backflip in the air.

Pinkie's heart deflated like a popped party balloon. The waterworks were really flowing this time, pooling in her eyes and dripping down her muzzle with no sign of ever stopping. She stopped walking, intending to go hide for a little while and get all of this ridiculous sadness out of her system, but then Dash turned around, hammering the nail into the coffin with very little remorse.

"Er, heh, no offense, Pinkie," she said, realizing that her friend was following well within earshot.

Pinkie quickly licked the moisture from her eyes in an attempt to hide her feelings from one of her dearest friends. There was no point in spoiling other ponies' moods, especially on such a special day as Dash's Birthaversary! She put on a brave face and gave her best Pinkie smile.

"None taken!" she said cheerily.

Dash grinned, reassured, and sped away to keep conversing with the stallion. Pinkie opened an eye, watching her friend go, before slowing to a stop and letting the party mob go on without her. Her mane wilted again as she slumped, sighing in defeat. With subdued motions, the mare turned around and trotted back toward Sugarcube Corner. Maybe the Cakes needed help with cake baking. She was great at cupcakes, and she had a sinking feeling that the bakery was about to get a lot busier.

1. A Desolate Pinkie

Five Days Later

Twilight Sparkle was having the time of her life. Already, Cheese Sandwich had thrown five spectacular parties, though they had all been eclipsed by Rainbow Dash's Birthaversary. She would daresay that it had been the party of the century, complete with giant party cannons, blow-up castles, huge Rainbow Dash piñatas, Dash lanterns, and even Dash cupcakes, courtesy of Sugarcube Corner. Twilight would have to remember to tell Celestia about it when she next visited Canterlot; she was certain that the sun princess would love to have Cheese Sandwich as the next soiree planner. It would probably be for the best, too; Cheese Sandwich would eventually have to move on, and when he did, he would need a place with welcome hooves.

For now, though, he was staying in Ponyville, and the whole town was rejoicing. Maybe all the ponies needed was a change of party. Pinkie's parties were great and all, but Cheese's parties had that extra oomph to it, whether they be less childish or just a different experience.

Twilight, however, felt like she was missing something. These parties just weren't as fun. She couldn't understand why; there was a special something, a balloon here or a streamer there, that just seemed like Cheese Sandwich was trying too hard. The youngest alicorn princess tried to shake it off, looking for somepony to talk to and snap her out of her strange mood. She scanned the huge room, which was currently hosting Angel's half-birthday party, for her friends. There was Dash, munching on her third round of cloud cake and positively rocketing away from the sugar rush. Fluttershy hovered over the guest of honor, making sure the picky bunny's needs were all satisfied. Twilight thought it best not to disturb either of them.

Applejack was proudly serving flasks of the Apple family's signature apple cider to thirsty guests, both equine and animal. Twilight made her way towards the huge barrels propped against the wall, ready to lend a helping hoof. As she approached, she saw Rarity moving towards Applejack at the same time, clearly with the same thought on her mind. Applejack grinned at her friends and waved them over.

"Howdy, Twilight! Rarity! Mind lending a helping hoof?" she asked, looking just a little flustered.

"Of course, Applejack!" Twilight responded with a smile. "Anything for a friend in need."

The two ponies moved to Applejack's side, helping her hand out more and more flasks of cider.

"It's strange," Rarity said, filling a dish for Fluttershy's mice friends. "I'm missing something here. Maybe it's the attire?"

She looked down at her immaculately sewed party dress, then back up at Applejack. The earth pony shook her head.

"Nah, that ain't it. You're right though... There's no cider without a Pinkie Pie. She hasn't been by to taste even a drop, and she's been begging me to bring Cider Season earlier this year."

"Pinkie Pie?" Twilight repeated. She scanned the room, looking for the familiar pouf of wild pink hair, but Pinkie Pie was nowhere to be found. "You're right. She's not here."

Understanding dawned in Rarity's eyes as she looked to her friends, then back out at the mass of excited ponies. Cheese Sandwich was dancing with the wall-eyed Derpy Hooves, but that was the only sign of anypony with Pinkie's signature updo.

"I've never known Pinkie to miss a party in her life!" the white unicorn exclaimed. "Oh, there really must be something wrong with her."

Twilight felt a knot forming in her chest, as if to confirm the truth of Rarity's statement. Thinking back, she couldn't remember seeing Pinkie at any of Cheese Sandwich's parties. She hadn't seen Pinkie... anywhere.

"Speaking of missing parties, when was the last time you saw Pinkie?" she asked, her elated party mood sinking.

Both ponies thought for a moment, and their expressions sobered.

"The day Cheese arrived in town," Rarity said. "Oh, the poor darling. She must be so upset, having her job taken from her like this! Why, I haven't spoken to her in days."

Twilight's worry appeared almost instantly. She couldn't imagine how Pinkie was feeling. There was no way of knowing her reaction to this sudden series of events without consulting her, and she doubted that either Rainbow Dash or Fluttershy had been in contact, what with the amount of partying going on.

"I'm going to go find her," the alicorn told her friends. "We've been horrible to her, to ignore her like this. The least I can do is apologize and offer her my company."

"I'll come with you," Applejack said, closing the tap. "It's my duty as her friend."

"And mine," Rarity agreed. "I'm sure Fluttershy has her hooves full with Angel and his friends, and..." she snuck a glance towards Rainbow Dash, who was on her fifth slice of cake, "... Dash seems busy."

The three ponies turned towards the door and galloped away, leaving the pulsing lights and the epic party to find their friend.

***

Twilight lead the trio through town, determination in their hearts and Pinkie on their minds. Ponyville was eerily quiet, having been distracted by the seemingly endless stream of parties, which made it that much easier to get to Sugarcube Corner. Twilight burst into the shop, where a tired-looking Mrs. Cake was bottle feeding Pumpkin and Pound.

"Hello, you three," she said in greeting, giving a half-hearted wave. "What can I do for you?"

"Actually, we've come to see Pinkie Pie," Twilight said nervously, looking up the stairs. "Is she home?"

Mrs. Cake's expression changed. It wilted like a dehydrated flower as she gently set down both bottles on the counter. With a great sigh, she nodded.

"Good of you to come," she said quietly. "She hasn't come out of her room since Cheese Sandwich's parties started, and... well, you'll see. She won't open the door for us."

Twilight shot a worried glance at her friends before heading up the stairs. She noted that all of Pinkie's party pictures had been removed from the wall, leaving only hooks and wires where there were once smiling faces. As they got closer, the ponies started to hear a quiet sobbing emanating from the direction of Pinkie's room, and they slowed.

There was a large puddle forming under the crack of Pinkie's door. It was tinged pink, and it slowly soaked into the carpet, spreading towards where the three ponies stood.

"Pinkie?" Twilight called. "Pinkie, it's us. Are you okay?"

This resulted in more sobbing, and the puddle started to spread faster. Twilight realized with horror that the water was made of Pinkie's tears, and she immediately stepped forwards, banging on the door with her hoof.

"Pinkie Pie! Let us in!" she cried, banging harder. When there was no response, she looked back to her two frozen companions, who were staring in shock at the spreading puddle.

"What do I do?" she asked them, panicking. Applejack snapped out of it, splashing through the sopping wet carpet to reach the door.

"Now, Pinkie, if you don't let us in, I'm gonna have to kick this door down!" she barked. "I'm serious!"

There was nothing but the steady stream of sobs from the other side of the door.

Steeling herself, Applejack turned around and lifted a leg. With an encouraging nod from her company, she thrashed out as hard as she could. The door splintered and flew open, slamming into the opposite wall with a bang.

Twilight couldn't believe what she saw. The room was almost completely flooded with tears, which, coming from Pinkie's previous impressive display of waterworks, was not so much of a surprise. The surprise was the puddle of red in the center, mixing with the salty water and spreading in tendrils of sorrow. And in the center, with tears streaming down her cheeks and blood seeping from deep cuts along her flank, was Pinkie Pie.

2. Recovery

Pinkie was sitting in a pool of blood and tears. She wasn't really aware that she was soaked, just that she was alone and in need of a greater good cry. It was something she hadn't let her friends know about; it was all about the show, wasn't it? She lived to make ponies smile and laugh. Who cared how Pinkie was feeling? She certainly didn't. It was a trivial matter in the grand scheme of things.

Until then. Because, despite all odds, the job of cheering ponies up had been handed off to certified party stallion Cheese Sandwich. Without a need to please everypony, Pinkie had found a time for her own emotions, and how badly they needed attention.

"Pinkie?" Twilight asked weakly, staring at the mess of a mare. "Pinkie, what happened?"

Pinkie Pie didn't want to look at her friends. They didn't deserve to see her like this, and she knew that they had done nothing wrong. With great effort, she forced her hair back into its generally poofy state and grinned up at her friends.

All three ponies took a step back. She couldn't understand why, and more tears pooled in her eyes, splashing onto the puddle beneath her. Looking down, she stared at her reflection and understood why, all of the sudden, her friends were terrified of her.

Her hair hadn't returned to its aloof state. Instead, it had merely become extremely disheveled, straight as a board and tangled into knots. Her smile, stretching from ear to ear, was far too wide to be sincere, and was greatly contrasted by the crazed, desperate look in her eyes. Her eyes shrunk to pinpricks as her knee started feeling pinchy, bouncing around like it had a life of its own.

"It's my knee! It's all pinchy! Something scary's gonna happen!" she exclaimed, her voice high as she looked up at her friends in fear. "You guys better hurry and get the Cakes! I'll tickle the monsters away! I'll tickle..."

The horrified expressions on her friends faces were enough to silence the pink pony. It took three seconds and a sudden shudder through her entire body for Pinkie to realize that it was a doozy.

She was the scary thing.

Then she began to laugh.

***

Twilight stared through the glass at her sleeping friend. The princess, unlike the slumbering Element of Harmony, had been up all night, worrying after Pinkie Pie.

"Your Highness?"

Twilight turned to see Nurse Redheart standing behind her, holding a clipboard and smiling in an attempt to lighten the mood.

"I have Pinkamena Pie's file here," she said, gesturing to it. "Miss Pie has suffered from immense blood loss and dehydration. When we woke her up, she seemed to be taking it all rather well, though she didn't remember inflicting those wounds on herself. From the cuts, we can determine that it was done with a kitchen knife, and they are self-inflicted, but she claims to not have done it."

The nurse pony looked somberly at the slumbering Pinkie Pie, whose hair had reverted to its normal frizzy curls. Twilight's mind spun, as she tried to imagine how far under the bar Pinkie must have fallen to hurt herself and not remember it.

"Despite the traumatic circumstances, she seems to be of stable mind," Redheart continued. "We should be able to release her in the next day or two."

Twilight stared anxiously at her friend, then back at the nurse. Her head was reeling with the impossibility of the situation, but she found a way to get her lips to move.

"Has her family been informed?" she asked. The nurse nodded.

"The Pies have been notified. We have been informed that they will be visiting shortly," she said grimly.

"Thank you for your help," Twilight said gratefully, shuffling her wings.

The nurse bobbed her head in a slight bow and turned away to speak to the next worried visitor. Twilight took one last look at her friend and turned to go find Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy. They needed to know.

***

Inside the Trauma Wing of the hospital, behind the glass of the waiting room, a broken mare stared at the ceiling, all alone.

***

Angel's party was still going on, though it was well into the early morning. Twilight watched with drooping eyelids as the sun peeked over the horizon, as if it were a signal for the partygoers to go home and rest before a belated day of work. She had sent Rarity and Applejack home when the two had expressed no desire to return to the festivities.

Twilight was going to have to put a stop to this. The parties were interfering with daily life, and it was her duty as a princess of Equestria to ensure the wellbeing of her citizens, even if she had only been a princess for less than a year. Cheese Sandwich had made his mark, but the partying had started to go overboard, and it had already put a pony in the hospital, albeit indirectly.

The alicorn slipped into the cottage holding most of the town and saw the ponies still going at it, as if no time had passed at all. Every curtain was drawn, and a disco ball had been hung in her absence. She groaned and ignited her horn, sending all of the blinds up and drawing each drape in a matter of seconds. The ponies stopped moving, blinking in the sudden light of the rising sun, and Twilight spotted her targets almost immediately.

Rainbow Dash, having abandoned the cake in favor of her athletic figure, was encouraging Tank to play with some of the other critters. Full of resolve, Twilight steeled herself and trotted over to Rainbow Dash, her expression grim.

"Hey, Twi, where'd ya go?" the pegasus asked, smiling at her friend. The smile faded as she took in the purple pony's expression, and she immediately abandoned her post at Tank's side. "What happened?"

"Pinkie's in the hospital," Twilight said quietly, looking around to ensure that none of the other ponies overheard. "She's... she hurt herself, Rainbow. We found her in a pool of her own blood, crying her eyes out."

Rainbow Dash stared at Twilight for a long time, uncomprehending. Then Twilight was reeling, blown back by the gust of wind the flier had thrown off as she burst out of the room, screaming after Pinkie.

"Pinkie Pie! I'm coming for you!" she cried. The scream echoed back into the house, silencing the townsponies and stopping the festivities.

"The party's over," Twilight informed the crowd grimly. They stared after Rainbow Dash, then filed slowly out of the door. Twilight went to go tell Fluttershy the inconceivable news.

3. Don't Leave

The Cakes had brought Gummy to the hospital to keep their lonely housemate company. For the first time in days, Pinkie perked up at the sight of her pet alligator. She squealed with joy and hugged the miniature reptile to her chest, and the Cakes watched with relief as her hair poofed back up to its cotton candy texture.

"Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!" she exclaimed, grinning at the Cakes as though nothing had happened in the past few days. Gummy attempted to bite her, latching onto her head and refusing to budge. Pinkie giggled.

"Have fun, Pinkie," Mrs. Cake said with sincerity, backing out of the hospital room and shutting the door. Pinkie watched with a huge grin as they trotted away, waiting until she was sure they had disappeared. It was then that she slumped back onto the bed.

As her smile faded, she felt her hair slipping back into its smooth, straight hairstyle, falling like a somber waterfall down her shoulders and neck. Almost angrily, Pinkie pried Gummy from her head and set him in her lap. As if it was routine, the alligator started to paw at her stomach, and she relaxed a little, the slight, uncomfortable pressure soothing her.

"Don't worry," she promised, her voice as aloof as ever. It provided a stark contrast to the rest of her somber appearance, though it didn't bother her in the least. "I know what to do when we get out of the hospital. We're going to throw the party of our lives, and they'll love it! Oh, I have to start preparations now! What do you think we should do first?"

Gummy blinked his right eye.

"That's right," she said, nodding. "We have to clean out the basement. We'll need a lot of room for all the ponies. What else?"

Gummy blinked his left eye.

"That's a great idea!" she exclaimed. "New stuff will certainly make this the best party in Ponyville history! I have to get a new party cannon and come up with a new cupcake recipe, and that'll mean a trip to the Everfree Forest to find some exotic ingredients. I gotta get... what was that?"

Gummy blinked twice.

Pinkie blanched in shock, aghast at the implied answer.

"What? No, that's terrible! Ponies for cupcakes? Eww! No, we're going to buy ingredients, not... harvest substitutes."

Pinkie sat in thoughtful silence, staring up at the stark white ceiling and stroking Gummy like a cat.

"I know, Dashie's visit was really nice, but... she was mean to us," she said to the ceiling. "I'll have to give her a special party. We have to make up for what we did wrong. Then she won't be mean to us again! We'll be best friends again."

Gummy started to chew on the end of her hair, but she didn't notice it. She was too deep in thought.

"Thanks, Pinkie," she said suddenly. "You always have the right suggestions. I think I'll invite Dashie and Cheesy over last. There's never been a party that was designed for everypony's personalities, has there? This is going to be the best party ever!"

She giggled, pleased with herself. Gummy stared up at her with his giant purple eyes, not understanding a word she had said, but enjoying the taste of her mane. It tasted a lot like his favorite punch.

***

Though Twilight and the others waited anxiously for her release, Pinkie was distracted, bouncing around the hospital room and singing a nonsensical song to herself. She knew her friends were waiting for her outside, but all she could think about was the party! There had to be the perfect amount of pink balloons, the right length of streamers, and eight giant floor mats. As with any special party, she knew it was going to be really messy, and cleaning up was a chore. She hated chores! There were so many other fun things to do than cleaning.

The welcoming crew leaped back in surprise as they were suddenly assaulted with what must have been barrels of confetti, shooting from the exit of the facilities with a loud bang. Giggles assaulted the ponies as glitter and little slips of paper rained down on them, catching in manes, tails, and horsefeathers.

"Hi guys!" cried a mass of pink fur from the doorway. "Happy late Birthaversary, Dashie!"

Rainbow Dash laughed awkwardly, shaking confetti out of her mane and smiling at Pinkie Pie.

"Er, thanks, Pinkie," she said. "Good to see you bouncing around..."

Rarity tsked, shaking her head in disbelief.

"Gah, my hair is an atrocity!" she muttered, but as Pinkie looked over to her, she plastered a smile onto her face.

"Come on home, darling," she said, waving her forward. "It's time for us to plan a party for you!"

As the five ponies led the excited Pinkie away, Twilight hung back, watching her friend. She winced at the sight of the bandages around Pinkie's stomach and over her flank, concealing her cutie marks, but that wasn't what was bothering the princess. Instead, it was the odd shape of Pinkie's eyes. She seemed fine and dandy, but her irises were abnormally large, and her pupils had shrunk to pinpricks.

It must be the medicine, she told herself, forcing herself to accept the excuse. Yes, it's just a side effect. I'm sure she'll be fine...

Still unnerved by the sight, Twilight trotted after them, resolving to speak to Cheese Sandwich. She hadn't gotten the chance to do so yet, but she was quite sure that the party pony had a right to know, and very soon.

Author's Note

Well, I figured the dislike was going to happen at some point or another. I just hope it doesn't become a trend... it still hurts that someone changed their mind for the worst rather than the better. I know it's not perfect, but I don't have prereaders, and this is all a rough draft. Thanks for sticking with me up until now, readers. Until... soon, brony on!

And for those of you who find yourselves shocked later, do remember that there is a gore tag. Just a hint...