Chapters A shrill southern accent rang though the household of Sweet Apple Aces. “Applebloom! Come and get yer lazy flank outta bed! It’s already a quarter to 4:00 AM!” Applebloom buried her head in the covers and groaned. Her sister was always obnoxious when it came to the weekdays, but there was something different about today that would leave the most prepared pony's mouth agape. No magic, no Pinkie sense, not even the all-seeing eleven-thousand eyed beast named Sam, (who, that everypony knew, could like, see everything) could forsee the event that featured Applebloom the Earth Pony:
It was today, Applebloom decided, that even though her sister would scream her lungs out, she would NEVER leave the soft paradise that was her mattress. (dramatic gasp!) Her family might threaten, her friends might cry, the entire town might even get on their knees and beg, (and oh, will they beg!) but this little filly WILL get her beauty slee-
“Ah made waffles!~” chimed the voice of Granny Smith.
“Waffles?” Mouth watering, Applebloom was in the kitchen in record time. “Alright, Ah’m up. Now gimme the…” Her spirts plummeted at the sight of her breakfast. “…cold cereal.” Defeated, Applebloom dunked her head in a bowl of milk & Pony-O’s.
“Use yer spoon, sugercube,” commented Applejack.
“Ah know,” sighed Applebloom. She raised her head and used her horn to… magically… lift… her… spoon………..
...She had a horn.
SHE HAD A HORN?!!
Applebloom took the whole ordeal suprisingly well.
...At first.
“Sweet Celestia, Ah’m a honest-ta-goodness unicorn!!!”
Big Macintosh studied his youngest sibling closely. He then surpised her by saying, “Nnope.”
Applebloom was shocked. “And just why th’ hay not? Ah have a horn, and unicorns have horns. Therefore, Ah'm a unicorn! It's simple!"
"Nnope." repeated her brother.
"Oh? And what's yer argument, Mister Knows-It-All?"
"It's just that last time Ah recall, unicorns don't have wings," replied Big Macintosh. Applebloom looked to her sides. Sure enough, she was the the proud (and confused-as-hay) owner of a pair of tiny, majestic wings. Wings that, without her even noticing, had allowed her to hover across the kitchen table and up to her brother's face.
"Oh........uhhhh......hehe....Ah was wonderin' why we were eye level."
And before you could say, "Holy plot twist, Batmare!" Applebloom fainted.
Twilight Sparkle: Exposition Fairy!
Applebloom awoke from her dreams filled with winged-unicorn-shaped waffles to discover that she was in the guest bedroom of Twilight Sparkle's house. She checked herself. She still had the horn. She still had the wings. She still had Spike sitting by her bedside-Wait, what?
"Oh, you're awake," Spike said. "Applejack's in the next room. She's with Twilight trying to figure out what happened to you and why, although I wouldn't look a gift horn in the wing." He chuckled at his own joke.
"Yer not funny. Why ya in here with me, anyway?" asked Applebloom cynically.
"Oh, they let me stay here to protect you and stuff 'cause I'm so manly," said Spike, "forgetting" to mention that the real reason he was here was that Twilight had grounded him for spoiling the ending of the latest Daring Do book for her and Rainbow Dash.
"Why would Ah need protectin'? Ah'm a pegacorn, fer cryin' out loud!"
"Alicorn," Spike corrected.
"What?"
"Twilight says a pony with wings and a horn is called an alicorn."
"Ya didn't answer mah question, Spike."
"Well, Princess Celestia has hundreds of thousands of guards in her castle," explained Spike. "Just in case she gets attacked when she's most vulnerable."
"So you was watchin' me in mah sleep 'cause Ah'm a princess?" asked Applebloom.
"Sure! All alicorns become princesses. And the guards aren't just there when the princess is asleep, they're there when she eats her meals, when she takes a bath, when she bushes her teeth, when she holds the royal court all day, when she hosts those boring frou-frou parties, (which I so totally did not attend last week to stalk Rarity!) when she goes to the Canterlot graveyard to morn all the friends she's outlived with her eternal life..."
"Say what-now?" interrupted Applebloom.
"Nothing!" Spike denied as he clapped his claw over his mouth. But it was too late. Applebloom was already crying.
"Ah don't wanna be a princess! Ah don't wanna live in Canterlot! Ah don't wanna raise no cesetial bodies! Ah don't wanna live forever! Ah just wanna live here in Ponyville an' grow old with mah friends an' family an' get mah cutie mark an' have mah privacy an' WHY DO ALICORNS HAFTA BE PRINCESSES ANYWAY?"
"I beleive I have the answer to that," said Twilight Sparkle as she entered the room.
Seeing Twilight as her deus ex machina, (look it up) Applebloom went from crying adoably to smiling adoably in a matter of seconds. (around Ponyville, such an act of emotional phenomenon was called "pulling a Pinkie Pie")
"So ya used yer magic science-y brian ta find me back ta normal?"
"Well... no," Twilight Sparkle replied. "But I have figured out why Applebloom suddenly turned into an alicorn."
"Why?" asked Spike.
"Because technically, she's always been an alicorn."
Applebloom did a double-take. "PurplebookwormsaysWHAT?"
Twilight was unfazed. "You see, all alicorns start out as normal ponies until certain conditions are met."
"Well first, the pony has to be born with perfect gender equality between unicorn, earth pony, and pegasus DNA," Twilight began, "and then she has to sneeze in her sleep without waking herself up while having the hiccups while the stars are perfectly aligned during the night of the luar eclipse on Venus..."
Hours later...
...all the while exactly 2,138,645,391 earthworms (gasp) whistle a dubstep remix of the Pony Pokey, (gasp) with each worm in a differnt post office around the world. (whew!)"
Applebloom blinked. "Whoa," she breathed. how'd ya figure all that out?"
"Oh, we spent days studying," said Twilight. "but in the end, Big Macintosh had the idea to contact Princess Celestia." Twilight blushed. "Frankly, I'm surprised I didn't come up with it myself."
Applebloom's jaw dropped. "Y'all told Princess Celestia 'bout this?!"
Twilight Sparkle frowned. "Applebloom, I know Spike didn't exactly put the whole 'princess' thing in the best light, but..."
"If Celestia knows, Ah'm gonna become a princess fer sure!' A look of despair showed in the Applebloom's face once again. "She' probably on her way right now! This the end for mah life in Ponyville as we know it! Worse, she'll tell everypony about it! Everpony's gonna think Ah'm a freak, or become jealous that royalty an' not wanna be mah friends anymore! (gasp) Mah friends! Sweetie Belle & Scootaloo are gonna kick me outta the Cutie Mark Crusaders 'cause Ah'm too busy livin' in Canterlot! What if they just don't want me 'cause Ah'm different? And how am Ah gonna-"
"Applebloom, look at me," demanded Twilight. Applebloom's red, puffy eyes met with Twilight's serious, understanding ones. "One: Your friends aren't going to take this the wrong way, or else they wouldn't real friends. Two: have you been listening to a word I've been saying?"
"H-huh?" sniffed Applebloom.
"The circumstances for your transformation are too far accurate for it to be a coincidence. There's a reason the Royal Pony Sisters rule Equestria, Applebloom. Because alicorns live forever, they eventually gain thousands of lifetimes worth of experience. Wtih that experience, they guide the ponies of the world down the right path. You, Applebloom, have been graced with the responsiblity, neigh, the honor of doing just so.
"B-but Ah don't HAVE 'thousands of lifetimes worth of expirience!' Ah'm justa foal!" protested Applebloom.
"That's why the greatest mentors alive, including the princesses, are going to tutor you on how to rule Equestria with wisdom, kindness, and strength." Applebloom gawked at this fact.
[Author's Note: And thus, the fic became 20% cooler! ]
Millions of questions still swam in Applebloom mind, but she could only surface one into words:
"Can Ah still stay in Ponyville?"
Twilight Sparkle smiled. "We'll see. Now, pack up your saddlebags, let's go."
Applebloom raised an eyebrow. "Go? Go where?"
"Don'tcha know?" Applejack said as her head popped from behind the doorway. "Just 'cause yer an alicorn don't mean y'all not excused from no educatin'! Yer late fer elementry school!"
Oh, crud.
Despite Twilight’s persuasions, Applebloom wanted to keep her newfound royalty a secret as long as possible. Fortunately for her, she convinced her family that the residents of Ponyville “won’t be ready fer th’ news.”
And honestly, who could resist the abyss of Applebloom’s puppy-eye face?
So, with a slight adjustment of the bangs in order to hide the horn, along with a certain Crusader cape; Applebloom, “mild-mannered Earth Pony,” was ready to face a normal day at school!
(…Okay, so she’s not that mild-mannered, but the public would be suspicious otherwise!)
As she handed in her late slip to Miss Cheerilee, (that vaguely stated something about an “apple pie emergency,”) Applebloom noticed that her two best friends, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, wore the same Cutie Mark Crusader capes as she had. What if…
Nah. Scootaloo already had wings, so even if she became an alicorn, she had no reason to hide them. And if Sweetie Belle became a bona-fide princess, Rarity would be rubbing it in the face of everypony in Canterlot.
So why were they wearing capes? Something didn't add up. Applebloom had to find out, but she couldn’t risk asking them directly without drawing attention to herself. It was time get creative: note-passing style!
Applebloom readied her pencil as she wrote the first note:
{Hey, Sweetie Belle! Ain’t it wurderful that we all wore our custum-made capes 2 skool on the same day?} Applebloom waited momentarily as the note got passed down to Sweetie Belle. Finally, the response came back to her:
{Yeah, I know! It’s like we’re connected or something. CUTIE MARK CRUSADER PSYCHICS! YAY!
P.S. Your spelling is really louise.} Applebloom vigorously read the letter over seven times. Well, nothing really out the ordinary, except that they tried the whole mind-reading thing last Fri-
“Applebloom?” Miss Cheerilee said, interrupting Applebloom’s train of thought.
“Yes Mam?”
“Since you like taking notes so much, how about you tell us the answer to this problem?” Cheerilee gestured to a ridiculously long algebra equation that what looked far too advanced for even the great scholars of Canterlot to decipher.
Or at least in a kindergartener’s head it was.
In short, Applebloom had no choice to take a complete shot in the dark and hope her answer wasn’t too embarrassing.
“Ummm……..uhhhhhhh……..is it forty-two?”
“Very good, Applebloom! For that, you win a gold star!” Cheerilee exclaimed. Applebloom beamed.
“Lucky guess,” snorted Diamond Tiara.
“Pst!”
Applebloom perked up. It was Snails, passing a note from Scootaloo. It read:
{Come to the clubhouse after school. We’ve got something 2 show U.
P.S. Nice job on the question! I bet even Twilight Sparkle would have trouble figuring that one out!} Applebloom was taken back. So, her friends WERE hiding something from her!
But she probably shouldn’t worry about it.
Because it was probably something good, like… a surprise party! Yeah.
It HAD to be something like that.
It just had to be.
Because her friends wouldn’t hide anything bad from her.
Right?
The rest of the school day went by quickly.
…………..
Oh, who am I kidding, IT TOOK FOREVER, but we’re going to skip until after school.
Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo sat in a quiet circle in their clubhouse. Sweetie Belle looked nervous, glancing around the room like she was sneaking a peak at one of Rarity’s “off-limits” romance novels. Finally, it was Applebloom whom broke the silence.
“So, what was that super-secret ‘thing’ that y’all wanted to show me?”
Scootaloo opened her mouth. “Well…”
“No!” Sweetie Belle blurted, covering up Scootaloo’s mouth with her hoof. She was responded with a double-barrel glare from Applebloom. The pint-sized alicorn was obviously frustrated, having to spend eight whole hours sitting in a class thinking of what kind of secret her friends must have been keeping her, with 90% of her guesses worthy of a “grimdark” tag.
“An’ why not?!” she raged, fury in her eyes. The very anticipation was getting to her. “Ah’m yer friend! What’s with all the hoo-hah?”
“W-well… I……. j-just wanted to start!” Sweetie Belle said, making up the excuse on the spot. “But first, you know how we’ll always be best friends forever?”
“Yeah…” Applebloom said, suddenly uneasy.
“No matter what?” added Scootaloo.
“Um, okay,” Applebloom whispered. She could feel her stomach turn with each slowly passing moment.
“Promise?” her friends said in unison.
“Wha?”
Sweetie Belle took a deep breath. “Promise us that we’ll always be best friends forever. No. Matter. What. Happens.”
“Ah promise.”
“Pinkie Promise?” requested Scootaloo.
“Alright, now y’all are scaring me.”
“Applebloom, Pinkie Promise.”
“Now this ain’t funny. Pinkie Promises are kinda on th’ heavy side-“
“PINKIE PROMISE.”
“Alright, alright! Crossmahheartandhopetoflystickacupcakeinmaheye.” Applebloom recited as she performed to gestures as fast could. “Now, spill!” Scootaloo looked at Sweetie Belle. Sweetie looked at Scootaloo. They nodded simultaneously, and removed their capes. What Applebloom saw made her jaw drop:
Her best friend forever had earned cutie marks. Up on Sweetie Belle’s flank was a bright pink musical note. Scootaloo’s cutie mark looked like an angry-looking chicken riding a scooter. (Scootaloo later explained that she got her cutie mark from a dare. When she had second thoughts about jumping a gulch forty feet wide and infested with giant eels, Snips & Snails had called her a chicken. “And nopony calls me chicken.”)
“We were afraid that you would get jealous and de-friend us,” explained Scootaloo. “You’re not jealous, are you?”
“What? No!” Applebloom was relieved, actually. This was a million times preferable to the thousand and one horrors she had the misfortune to imagine back at school. “Ah’m happy fer you! Once a Crusader, always a Crusader!”
They then squealed in unison, “CUTIE MARK CRUSADER BEST FRIENDS FOREVER! YAY!” They then hugged each other with all their strength.
The moment was short-lived, however. For when their embrace ended, Applebloom noticed that her mane had ruffled back to normal, revealing her horn. What’s more, her cape had fallen off, exposing her wings.
The reaction of her friends resembled nothing less than a blue screen of death.
[Author’s Note: Dear Princess Celestia,
By the end of the next chapter, the audience will learn that you don’t need a grimdark tag to tear a pony apart.
All you need to do is tear apart the world around her.
Sincerely yours,
The Author]
We Drop the Comedy Tag for a While
Once again, the clubhouse fell into complete silence. Then, after a while, Scootaloo spoke up.
“A-are those real?”
Applebloom bit her lip. “Ummm… y’all like ‘em?”She squeaked.
“Like them?” Sweetie Belle said, her voice rising. “LIKE. THEM?!! Just now we tell you that we were worried sick on how you would reject us and disband the Cutie Mark Crusaders, and you just dismissed it like it was nothing. Oh, but now that we find out that you changed into an entirely different species , so it’s now that you suddenly care about what we think!” Applebloom bit her lip once more, this time drawing the tiniest bit of blood. It wasn’t like Sweetie Belle to turn on her friends, but under the extreme circumstances, anypony could’ve broken down to mess of tears and rage.
Besides, she had a point: Applebloom had kept her friends in the dark, and now the guilt was crushing her like a ton of bricks.
“Sweetie Belle…” Applebloom whimpered, “Ah… Ah’m sorry. Ah’m sorry Ah didn’t tell you. Y’all are mah friends, and friends shouldn’t lie like this. We should be proud of who we are, and not get no silly bodily changes get the way of our friendship!” she proclaimed.
“Oh yeah? Is that what you said to Twist back when you two were friends?” Scootaloo bitterly replied.
“Huh?” Applebloom said obliviously, and was taken aback by the sudden the sudden change in subject. “What does Twist hafta do with any of this?” Upon Applebloom’s question, Scootaloo’s features contorted as her face went from a bright orange to red with frustration.
“Twist,” she hissed, a combination of ice, steel, and venom coating her every word. “You know who I’m talking about. Red hair. Glasses. Has a cutie mark, ” she continued. “A cutie mark, I’m sure you remember she recently got. Remember now? She got it right before you replaced her with US!!!”
Applebloom gulped. Suddenly, the promise that her friends made her take made horribly too much sense.
“Yeah, Ah remember Twist,” she said nervously. She looked at the floor, avoiding eye contact.
Scootaloo wasn’t done. “Well, have you even said two words to her since that party? Huh? Do you even know what she was doing at recess today?”
“S-she was on the s-swings,” stuttered Appleboom.
“Crying,” corrected Scootaloo, “She on the swings crying. Why? Because Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon made fun of her lisp, and no one was there for her!”
“Why didn’t you two help her?” asked Applebloom defensively.
“We were too busy dealing with you asking question about what we were hiding,” Sweetie Belle retorted. Applebloom sighed. Then Twilight Sparkle’s words echoed in her head:
Your friends are not going to take this the wrong way, or else-
No.
-or else-
NO! DO NOT FINISH THAT SENTENCE.
…or else they wouldn’t be real friends. This very idea made Applebloom want to dig a hole a hundred miles deep and never come out. Her head started to throb. She found that couldn’t breathe. She shut her eyes as hard as she could. Ah wish Ah could just go away, she thought. Ah wish Ah could go far, far away so this empty pain in mah chest would stop hurting.
Suddenly, something in her head went click, and Scootaloo’s and Sweetie Belle’s voices stopped. Applebloom opened her eyes. She saw she was in a library. The most expensive library Applebloom had ever seen. A giant hourglass stood as tall as the tallest apple tree in the center of the room. Bookcases that took up multiple stories piled up to the fifty-foot-high ceiling. Huge glass windows supplied a view of Equestria’s capital city, the sprawling metropolis of Canterlot.
Applebloom realized that she, within the first day of being an alicorn, had teleported. All the way to Canterlot, no less!
“Well, well,” said Princess Celestia, looking up from her book. “This is… unexpected. Your powers are developing well. I think you’re going to be a fine princess one day!” she encouraged the young filly.
And that’s when the newest alicorn, Princess Applebloom of Equestria, cried for hours on end.
Celestia watched Applebloom sob. Poor girl, the goddess of sunlight thought. It’s like looking at an old picture of myself. She walked over to the blank-flanked filly, which in turn faced away.
“Go away,” Applebloom muttered. “Ah don’t wanna talk to you. Ah don’t even know you. Ah… Ah hate you!”
“Oh?” Celestia said, lowering her head all the way down to eye level. “And why is that, little one?”
“C-cause Ah didn’t even ASK fer none of this,” protested Applebloom, tears still steaming down her baby cheeks. “If you think Ah’m just gonna let everthang get taken taken away from me just so y’all have and extra hoof in ruling Equestria, y’all gotta another… (sniff)” she struggled to finish her sentence. “…(sniff) another… (sniff, sniff)” It was no use, and her voice returned to inaudible, blubbering sobs. “Waaaaaaaaaahhh!!! Ah just want mah friends baaaack!”
“You believe I want to see you suffer?” Celestia said, sitting down. “On the contrary, I wish could take it all away.”
“Yer just saying that ‘cause you and Luna hafta put up with the guards!”
Celestia laughed at this. “After a decades, you barely notice them. No, I’m talking about why you’re crying. You only have good cry like you’re having only once in your life. Lord knows I did.”
“You cried? But yer Princess Celestia! Ah don’t remember in any history books of ya crying!” said Applebloom in disbelief.
“You know, you’re a princess too,” Celestia reminded. “And you’re weeping your very eyes out right now. Besides, history has a nasty habit of ignoring the flaws of the victor.”
“Ignorin’ the what-now?”
Celestia sighed. “It means ponies didn’t want to look at me in a bad way.”
“Oh,” stated Applebloom. “Anywho, what was thing that got YOU all worked up?” The two alicorns’ eyes met, and Applebloom saw the expression on the ruler of Equestria’s face was that of mourning.
Celestia gulped, and her voice wavered slightly. “It was when my husband died. Old age.” She chuckled halfheartedly. “I nearly blotted out the sun, I was so depressed.”
“What happened?” asked Applebloom. “How didja cope?”
“Luna came along,” answered the eldest princess. “You know, there was a time when we were alicorns, but didn’t rule Equestria.”
“Really?”
“Indeed. Back then, we were just victims of magical phenomena. Outcasts, really. Luna was my only friend in the world. Over the years, even though we weren’t really related, we came to call each other sister.”
“How’d y’all become princesses then?” inquired Applebloom.
“Discord happened,” explained Celestia. “After his defeat, we took over. Nopony really objected, especially since the previous rulers (Emperor Hurricane and his constantly bickering wife, Queen Platinum) were hypnotized into thinking that they were their own eyeballs,” she shook her head. “Don’t ask on how that worked. I’ve gotten enough off topic already. The point is that Luna and I will always be there for you, because that what sisters do. On my word as a princess.”
“So what, we’re sisters now?” asked Applebloom, surprised.
“That’s an order,” Celestia giggled. And before Applebloom could object, the little filly was swept into a loving glomp.
“Sweetie Belle?” Rarity yelled though the closed door of her sister’s room. “Is everything alright, dear?” Rarity didn’t understand. Sweetie Belle had just ran into the house crying and muttering things like, “How could she?” before immediately locking herself in her room. (What’s worse, the little brat had taken Rarity’s favorite fainting sofa in with her!)
“No! I’m not coming out!” cried the distressed voice of Sweetie Belle.
“Is this about the cutie mark?” asked Rarity.
“No!” denied Sweetie Belle. “Well… yes. No. Sort of. Maybe. I don’t know, go away!”
“I’m not going anywhere until you come out of room and tell me what’s wrong! (And that you return my sofa back to me,)”
“But I neeeeeeeeeed it!~” whined Sweetie Belle. “Besides, it’s always helped you out when you were in trouble!”
“That’s completely different,” Rarity defended. “I’m simply a lady with certain needs. Now, for the last time, come out!”
“No!”
“Come out.”
“No!”
“Come out.”
“No!”
“Come out.”
“No!”
“Please come out?”
“Hmmmm… Nope!”
“Pretty please come out your room with a new issue of Coltsmarepolotain Magazine on top?
"NO!!!!"
“You are going to come out this instant young filly, or I swear Celestia’s royal flanks I shall BREAK THE DOOR DOWN!”
“This door always looked frumpy anyway!”
“Oh. It. Is. On!” And rather than deal with the door itself, Rarity took a page from Twilight Sparkle’s book (no pun intended) and teleported to the other side. “You may steal my precious furniture,” she ranted. “You may call me a neat-freak, you may make bigger messes and even worse meals than I thought physically possible, you may make fun of me for going on that nightmare of a date with Prince Blueblood and the-rock-that-must-be-named, you may try to disown me as a sister for Applejack, and I’ve even forgiven you out of the kindness of my heart for the complete and utter LIES that wrote about me in that wretched school paper!” Rarity lowered her voice to a whisper. “BUT CAROUSEL BOUTIQUE IS SACRED GROUND. Listen closely Sweetie Belle, and you better listen well: Unless you want to wake up one morning to find yourself on a train halfway to Tartarus, you will never use… that… that ‘F-word’ to describe a single speck of dust that wafts into my beloved paradise of fashion. Do we have an understanding?”
Sweetie Belle gulped. “YesRarityeverythinginyourstoreisdropdeadfabulous,” she managed to squeak.
“Splendid!” Rarity said as she suddenly perked up. “Oh, and thank you so kindly for the complement, it means so much for me. I work so hard to keep things trendy and you wouldn’t believe how hard it is to-“
“Uh, Rarity?” Sweetie Belle interrupted.
“Yes, darling? I do believe there was something that was bothering you before.”
“No, you’re tail’s kinda… half in the door.”
Rarity looked back. Apparently when she had teleported, part of her tail had materialized in solid wood. So, being that she’d never been in this situation before, she acted upon instinct and screamed, “Of all the things that could happen, this is the WORST. POSSIBLE. THING!” She then tried to jump onto her sofa, but overestimated her new tail length. As a result, she landed flat on her face. Sweetie Belle giggled.
After a quick and reluctant tailcut, Rarity saw that her little sister’s mood had improved, so the fashionista decided to take the initiative once more.
“So, did you show Applebloom that new cutie mark yet?” she asked. Sweetie Belle looked at the floor.
“Yeah.”
“And how’d she take it?”
“I don’t wanna talk about it,” grumbled the depressed filly. Rarity’s ears drooped in sympathy.
“Was really that bad?” she asked. Sweetie Belle answered with silence.
“Sweetie Belle,” Rarity coaxed, “I’m your sister. You know you can tell me anything, right darling?”
“Yeah, whatever.”
“And no matter how big of a fight you had, I’m sure that you’ll always remain frineds,” encouraged the reluctantly tailess unicorn.
“How do you know that? You don’t even know what happened!” argued Sweetie Belle.
“True,” admitted Rarity. “Perhaps you could shed some light on that little subject?” Sweetie Belle thought it over.
“Alright,” the little filly said, “Try this on for size…”
And so, Sweetie Belle recounted the events of the clubhouse to her big sister.
“…Goodness,” was all Rarity could say.
“I know,” said Sweetie Belle matter-of-factly.
“But one question remains,” thought Rarity out loud. “How did Applebloom ever become an alicorn?”
“I dunno,” Sweetie Belle shrugged. “I mean, she didn’t exactly stick around to ask.” Suddenly Rarity gasped in realization. “What?” asked Sweetie Belle, her curiosity peeking.
“Ideeeeaaa!~” beamed Rarity, her eyes practically dazzling. “We just don’t know the whole story yet!” Her one-filly audience’s reaction was that of confusion.
“Come again?” Sweetie Belle said flatly.
“No time to explain! We must get an explanation!” And before Sweetie Belle could ask what in Equestria her sister was going on about, she found herself being rushed out of Carousel Boutique.
“Wait, where are we going?!” cried the perplexed pint-sized pink-and-purple-maned pony.
“To the scene of the crime!”
”What crime??!” Rarity stopped in mid-gallop.
“Oh, think nothing of it darling, I just always wanted to say that.” And with that, she continued on without another word of explanation.
[Author’s Note: The glomping of Applebloom and Celestia was so adorable the author’s heart exploded twice, resulting in double-corrective heart surgery. Hence, any & all “Princess Molestia” jokes about said glomp shall be sent TO THE MOOOOOON!!!!!!!]
“So, let me get this straight,” Sweetie Belle said slowly. “Your sister just woke up with a horn and wings?”
“Eeyup,” confirmed Big Macintosh. After Rarity had grabbed Sweetie Belle (and shortly afterward, Scootaloo) the trio had gone to Sweet Apple Acres to get the story straight.
“…And you’re saying that she is to be princess now?” asked Rarity.
“Eeyup,”
“But she didn’t want to be a princess? That’s why she didn’t tell us?” Scootaloo inquired.
“Eeyup & eeyup,”
“So she wasn’t gonna abandon us?!” beamed Sweetie Belle.
“Nnope,”
Rarity stood up straight, triumphant that she had been right about Applebloom’s feelings all along. “Well, I’m glad that she had very good reasons for keeping secrets like that. Come along darlings, I bet you two owe poor Applebloom an apology,” She glanced around the orchard. “Speaking of which, where is the little dearie?”
Big Macintosh shrugged. “Been lookin’ fer her all afternoon,”
“Oh no!” gasped Sweetie Belle. “What if we made her run away from Ponyville?”
“Don’t be absurd,” dismissed her elder unicorn sister. “You tried to run away three times, and you never got further than halfway across town! Wherever Applebloom is, I’m sure that she couldn’t have gotten far, and that she’ll be back at home in no less than… oh, let’s say… 45 minutes.”
Seven hours later…
“Mah sister’s been ponynapped!” cried Applejack.
“Don’t worry Miss Applejack, we’ll find her,” assured the Mayor. She then addressed the rest of the Ponyville Search Party of Fun Stuff Even Though It’s Not Really a Party. (Name patented by Pinkamena Diane Pie.) “Alright everypony, we’re looking for a blank-flanked filly, whom I’m told has both a horn and wings, that responds to the name ‘Applebloom.’”
“Hold up! Isn’t Applebloom an Earth Pony?” asked Random Backround Pony #37. There was a murmur of agreement. No one could match the wit and observation skills of Random Backround Pony #37!
“Well, yes… and no,” said the Mayor as she fidgeted. “It’s extremely complicated, and I’ve only been told half the story.”
“Hey, you can withhold information from us like that!” objected a mint-colored unicorn named Heartstrings, but known as Lyra. (Don’t ask.) “It’s a free country, and I demand as my right as a citizen to know!”
“We live under a government ruled by two immortal beings that raise the sun & moon,” deadpanned the Mayor. “Who said anything about a free country?”
“Good point,” observed Lyra. “All hail Celestia!”
The Mayor sighed. “Now, if there will be no more interrupt-“
“I’m afraid the search party won’t be necessary, Mayor,” interrupted Princess Celestia, riding down on her trademark awesome sky carriage. (of awesomeness) “Applebloom is safe here right beside me,”
The Mayor scratched her head. “But where in Equestria WERE you?” she asked Applebloom.
“Ah was in Canterlot the whole time!” replied the filly. “Ah teleported mahself allllll the way to the castle! Oh, and Ah just want to apologize to mah friends for-Hey, why’s everypony lookin’ at me funny?” After a moment of contemplation, she figured out the reason why: her horn and wings were exposed for all to see. Princess Celestia cleared her throat.
“My fellow and honored Equestrians,” the white alicorn announced, “It is my pleasure to introduce to you the third ruler of Equestria, your humble resident of Ponyville, Princess Applebloom!” the crowd was shocked. It was one thing for a foal to sprout wings, another to grow a horn overnight, but it was a world-shaking concept for a filly to sell you a couple apples one day and for you to have to call her “your majesty” the next. Suddenly, two little ponies broke the silence.
“Yeah, whoo-hoo! You go girl!” cheered Scootaloo.
“I really like your mane!” Sweetie Belle said as she applauded with all her heart. The Apple Family joined in. Soon, all of Ponyville was in applause. (Well, except Diamond Tiara, but she passed out for some reason.)
After everypony calmed down, Applejack came across a plot-hole realization. “Hey, why did it take seven hours fer y’all to get down to Ponyville?” she asked Celestia accusingly.
“Well, Applebloom and Luna got into a rather… intense game of checkers, but after they broke even, I assure you we came down as soon as possible,” explained Celestia.
“Hey!” snapped Applebloom, “Ah beat her best 27 outta 51, fair and square!”
“Well, ya still scared the livin’ horseapples outta everypony,” said Granny Smith. “Yer grounded, ya little immortal, you!”
Applebloom shrugged. “Ah was kinda expectin’ that, but… could ya postpone that fer five minutes?”
“Why’s that?”
“Ah gotta have an honest talk with mah friend Twist,” said Princess Applebloom as she winked.
THE END.
[Author’s Note: No sequels. (trolololololol)]
