Your Faithful Student

by Cadence

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Sad, Princess Celestia, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 3450

A revelation from Princess Celestia about her past turns Twilight's world upside down.

During a party celebrating the anniversary of Nightmare Moon's defeat, an unexpected letter from the princess turns Twilight Sparkle's entire world upside down, leaving her to try and find meaning in a life that she now knows has been nothing but a lie.

Published 2011-10-19 23:49:08 UTC
Last updated 2011-10-20 01:11:50 UTC

Chapter 1

Your Faithful Student

"No. This... this can't be right. There must be some mistake!" Twilight Sparkle said, her eyes scanning over the scroll for what must have been the third time at least. "There's no way she... I can't believe it. I won't believe it!"

"Um, Twi? Is everything alright, sugarcube? Only, you've been starin' at that letter for goin' on ten minutes now." She could hear a voice say. Applejack's,her mind called up for her even through the shock, though she was too caught up in what she'd just read to give any sort of reply.

Getting no response from her friend, the orange earth pony glanced over towards the other four mares in the room, wearing a look of concern that was mirrored on each of their faces. Even Pinkie Pie, usually so cheerful and upbeat no matter what the situation was, could tell that there was something seriously wrong with Twilight.

The six of them had all met up inside of the Ponyville Library, which also doubled as Twilight's house, in order to celebrate the one year anniversary of their defeat of Nightmare Moon. Pinkie Pie had thrown a party just for the six of them and Spike, and everypony had been enjoying themselves when Twilight had received a letter from Princess Celestia, marked as needing her immediate attention. Though she hadn't read it aloud, it was clear to the others from the way that she simply froze up that whatever was written there wasn't good news.

A sudden laugh from Twilight caused them all to jump, Fluttershy letting out a little squeak in surprise and backing up a bit. The lavender unicorn looked to each of them with a rather manic grin on her face, giving another laugh that contained absolutely no humor.

"Oh, ha ha girls. This is pretty funny. You really had me going for a while there. Great prank, Rainbow Dash." She said with a strained smile, turning to the brash pegasus, who shook her head, looking utterly confused.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Twilight. What prank? Is there something off about that letter?"

Twilight hesitated for a moment at that. The pegasus sounded genuine enough, and she'd normally admit to any pranks once they'd gone off. That brought her attention to the other prankster friend of hers.

"Then it must have been you, Pinkie. Right? No need to hide it. Just fess up and then we'll all have a good laugh and put this behind us."

The pink pony tilted her head oddly before replying. "Um... nope! I haven't pulled any pranks. Well, unless you count the sneezing powder on the pin the tail on the pony tail. Oh, or the fake flower that squirts water when you sniff it. Ooh, and the spicy lemon drops! Those are always a favorite! I didn't write any letters though."

With the two likely candidates down, Twilight's desperation to find somepony to pin this on could be plainly seen as she looked at each of her friends in turn. Finally, her gaze fell on her assistant, Spike, who merely shook his head, giving her a concerned look. With the realization that nopony was playing a prank on her, at least as far as she could tell, her back legs gave out and she fell to a sitting position, staring blankly into space. The magic holding the letter up cut out and it dropped to the floor. Seeing this, Rarity glanced over at the others before cautiously approaching.

"Twilight, Darling. Just what is in that letter that has you so flustered? We're your friends, you can tell us." The white unicorn said, backed by nods and agreements from the others. "Is it another assignment from Princess Celestia? Has something happened in Canterlot, or to somepony you know?"

Again getting no response from the stricken Twilight, she bit her lip for a moment before her horn lit up, a white glow surrounding the letter. Before she could so much as raise it from the ground though, a purple bubble of magic surrounded it, cutting off her own. Seeing the look Twilight was giving her, she quickly backed off.

"It... It's fairly obvious that there is something wrong, Twilight, and that you need some sort of help. But there is nothing we can do if you won't even talk to us." Rarity said, sounding somewhat nervous but firm. "Please, we only want to help you."

Finally, after a minute of silence, Twilight gave a slow nod and once again floated the piece of paper up to where she could read it.

"D-dear my most faithful student, Twilight Sparkle." She began, her voice rather hoarse and her friends could tell that she was trying hard to keep from dissolving into tears. "No, I can't say that. Not now. It feels... wrong. I do not deserve to have a pupil such as you. Not after what I've done... There is something I've been keeping from you all along and, though I would rather undertake one thousand other unbearable tasks, you need to know it. You will be bound to figure it out for yourself eventually, but it's better that I'm the one to tell you. A lack of communication nearly lost me my sister so many years ago and I don't want to risk losing you, though I fear I will anyways.

I have always told you that you were chosen to serve as my personal pupil for your incredible magical talent and this is true to some extent. There was another, ulterior motive for it though. As I'm sure you've already guessed, I knew of Nightmare Moon's eventual return and had been planning for it decades in advance. Unfortunately, for what I had done to my sister, to dear Luna, the Elements of Harmony were no longer mine to use. I knew that I had to find somepony else who had the spark, who could bring the Elements back to life, but all of my searching proved futile. Then, I found you. A miraculous birth that resulted in a miraculous pony.

Every part of me is saying to stop this here and let you go on in blissful ignorance, but you have to know. The ponies you know as your parents are such by adoption alone. Your true parents perished when an Ursa Major attacked the town they lived in. I... was unable to get there in time to save them, or the other ponies who died that day. Somehow though, and even I do not fully understand it, you managed to survive. Still a newborn foal, not even a year of age, and you somehow repelled the Ursa and halted the attack. When I found you in the ruins, I knew then that I had finally found the pony I was looking for. But you would need training if you were to take up the Elements of Harmony and defeat Nightmare Moon. You would need to be brought up properly... And so it was that I entrusted you to Star Sparkle and Crescent, to raise you as their own.

Please, I beg of you, do not hate them for their part in all of this. They were merely doing as I commanded, though it is true, and I'm sure you can testify to this, that they loved you just as much as if you were their own child. Still, from that day forth, I was watching over you. Waiting until the day that you were ready to undergo your proper training. When that day came, and you were handed over to me for teaching, I knew then that what I was going to do to you was unpardonable. Every day, I told myself it was for the good of all Equestria, but that phrase has always sounded forced to me...

When I wasn't teaching you the skills you would need later to defeat Nightmare Moon, I realized that you needed more than just teaching. And so I did what I could to keep you occupied and happy. I did my best to... to act, if not as a friend, then at least as a kindly mentor figure. And I believe I succeeded there far more than I had ever planned... When the time finally arrived and I sent you to Ponyville, where I knew the arrival of Nightmare Moon would occur, I also knew that the friends you made there would be the proper bearers of the other Elements of Harmony. How could they not be after how much you had been drilled into your own position? The moment of truth arrived and the six of you performed spectacularly. I was so very proud of you, and also of myself for having created and molded you into who you are and it wasn't until I received your first friendship report that I realized just how much you cared for and depended upon me...

Since that day, I've been trying to work up the courage to tell you all of this, as I knew I must, but I could never do it. It has taken constant badgering from Luna to finally bring me to this point. I know that this... betrayal, for what else can it be called, will hurt you, possibly more than you have ever been hurt before, and I just want you to know, for what it's worth, that I am truly sorry. For the crimes I have committed against you, there can be no forgiveness, but I am still vain enough to hope that you will somehow understand that I utterly regret what I did then and now. To hope that, if it is at all possible, you will someday forgive me..."

As Twilight finished reading the lengthy letter, she clenched her eyes tightly shut and once more released the paper. Silence filled the library as the other five ponies thought through what they had just heard. The sound of a hoof stomping against the floor, followed by Rainbow Dash's voice, finally broke the silence.

"That... that... how could she do something like that to you? To anypony! Ugh, I can't believe this!" She shouted, anger seething in her voice as her wings flared out aggressively. "You can't mess with another pony's trust like that. Building up a relationship simply to cause them to do what you want? It makes me sick!"

"Now Rainbow," Said Applejack in a reasoned voice, though it sounded as if she was suppressing some anger herself. "Ah'm sure the princess had no other choice in the matter. Y'all've met her! There's no way she'd do somethin' like that unless she just had to ta save Equestria. Ah'm sure if there was another way, she'd have taken it. "

A meek voice spoke up following this, as if its owner didn't want to risk offending anypony with what she said. "I... I agree with Rainbow Dash. Though maybe not as, um, strongly. What Princess Celestia did to Twilight was very, very cruel. But... I guess she did have a reason, maybe..."

As Fluttershy's voice faded away, it looked as if Applejack and Rainbow Dash were about to get into a heated argument, but they were stopped by pointed looks from Rarity. In the silence that followed, Pinkie Pie, her bounce a little more subdued than normal, made her way over to Twilight to sit beside her, wrapping one of her fore-legs around her shoulders.

"Aww, that's really sad, Twilight. Maybe she should be called Princess Meanie instead! But then Nightmare Moon would have to have a different name... what could that be? Hmm... Oh, I nearly forgot I came over to cheer you up! I know what it's like to feel sad, but there is one thing that always makes me feel better. A song! Oh wait, I don't know any songs for this... I'll just make one up now then! While I do that though, you should know that everything will be okay. You'll see."

Twilight's eyes snapped open at that and she turned to look at Pinkie, tears in her eyes.

"E-everything is going to be okay? How? How can anything be okay now? Everything I know is wrong. The constants, the things that have kept me going my entire life, they've all been turned upside down. I built my life around her! My whole life!" She shouted, starting to sob as she spoke. "She was... almost like a mother to me. Everything I've done, all that I am, has been to... to please her. To make her look at me and smile and say that I've done good... and now, all those feelings, all the time I spent with her... it was all fake? Just so she could turn me into a pawn?"

"N-now Twi, that ain't necessarily-" Applejack began, but Twilight didn't seem to be listening. She had clenched her eyes shut and was shaking with quiet sobs. As the unicorn continued to speak, oblivious to her friends now, a light started to gather at her horn, shining brighter and brighter.

"Everything I know is false. My life is just one big lie! I've never even known anything about my true parents, thanks to her. All the time we spent together and she never once mentioned anything. Nothing but study, training, and preparation! Or worse, time spent winning me over with nothing but lies and false emotions! All those happy days, were they all just part of her plot? And what now? Now that I have done exactly as she planned for me, what purpose do I have? Has she simply discarded me now that Nightmare Moon is gone? She didn't even bother to come here and tell me herself!"

As Twilight ranted, her sorrow melted away into anger, anger at the one who she now realized had been playing her all along. The glow from her horn spread to completely consume her, soon forming around other nearby objects as well. Books, cakes, glasses, and even Pinkie's pet alligator began to rise up into the air around her. As the glow grew brighter and brighter, larger objects were affected, including Twilight herself, who floated up a short ways into the air, completely oblivious to her friends' cries as they tried to stay out of the maelstrom of magic storming through the Library. Oblivious as the door opened and another pony stepped in.

She had fallen silent, no longer ranting out loud though her thoughts continued on, adding fuel to her anger. She had never been loved by anypony. The one pony she had trusted completely and utterly had been a liar and a betrayer all along, so how could she trust anypony else? They were all lying to her, simply trying to use her for their own purposes and they should have to pay for that. Turning her gaze towards her 'friends', her eyes began to glow with that same light, the light growing to such an intensity that it was painful to look at and seemed to be inflicting pain upon those who were hit by it.

Suddenly, without warning, somepony was standing between her and the others, wings wide outstretched as her own horn glowed softly, taking the brunt of the magical assault. As Twilight watched, barely comprehending what was happening, the alicorn slowly stepped forwards until she was standing right in front of her, nearly blocking her sight entirely. Realizing who this new pony was, her eyes narrowed and she gritted her teeth, the other ponies watching in horror as she glared at their princess.

"You! What are you doing here? Have you come to mock me now, Celestia?"

"I came because I need to be here." The princess responded evenly, though there was strong emotion behind her words. "I was so busy with the Summer Sun Celebration that I wrote you that letter rather than come in person. As soon as I sent it though, I knew this was wrong and that I needed to be here in person to tell you. I couldn't get free to make my way here though, not for a while."

"Why would you bother? You don't care about me. You never cared about me. All you've ever done is lie to me. Deceive me and set me up to be a good little pawn before throwing me away once I had outlived my purpose. Do you even read those reports I send to you or are they just busywork? Something to keep me occupied?"

Celestia visibly winced at this tirade, tears forming in her eyes as she looked into Twilight's, the tips of her feathers beginning to blacken a bit as she continued to hold her ground despite the blistering magic. "Every one..." She murmured softly. "They give me hope that I haven't destroyed you completely. That you are your own pony and not just a vessel for the Elements of Harmony. I was afraid that after all of you defeated Nightmare Moon, you would lose all sense of purpose. But you didn't, thanks to your friends. True friends who care for you, every one. Friends who have done nothing to deserve your anger, unlike me..."

At this, Twilight looked confused, the surge of power lessening a bit as she looked past Celestia to see her friends laying on the ground, watching what was happening in fear. The sight caused her to tremble a bit, more of the magic fading away as she realized that she had hurt them without meaning to. That she had lashed out in her anger at the ponies who were probably the least deserving of it. At this moment of hesitation, Celestia stepped forward to wrap her wings around Twilight, leaning her head gently against the lavender unicorn's neck.

"Twilight... my dear, dear Twilight... I am so sorry for what I have done to you. There is no excuse for it, none that stand up against what I did. I have taken everything from you... I do not ask for forgiveness, nor do I expect it. I... I merely wanted to apologize to you for everything, and to see you one last time. To let you know that I do care about you, even if it doesn't seem like it. It took me far too long to realize this, and this delay has caused irreparable harm. For this, I am so very sorry..."

These words extinguished Twilight's anger, leaving her unsure of what to say as she tried to sort through her own feelings at the moment. After a short hesitation, she closed her eyes and wrapped her fore-legs around Celestia's neck in a tight embrace, tears flowing freely again. The magic around her faded completely, objects falling to the ground all around.

"Princess, I... I could never forget the time we spent together in Canterlot. The way we laughed together, the joy of those days, the simple bliss of being by your side... whether the way you felt then was real or faked, they were still some of the happiest moments of my life and I wouldn't trade them for anything. I've always looked up to you. Wanted... wanted to hear you say that I've done well... I can't lie though. Knowing that you kept all this from me... that is a huge blow and it changes a lot of things. I... I don't think that our relationship will ever be the same..."

Tears sprang once more to the alicorn's eyes, but she nodded slowly. "I understand. It has been a pleasure to have been able to be your teacher, Twilight Sparkle. I... I wish you and your friends the best of luck as you continue to grow and learn more of the magic of friendship. Goodbye, my faithful student..."

With that, she gently pulled away from the embrace before turning toward the other five ponies in the room. "And you, my brave little ponies... I'd like to ask that you take good care of Twilight for me. She is a very special pony, as are all of you. Together, you will all be able to accomplish great things. To be honest, I... I envy you a bit. Farewell."

Now making her way towards the door, one of her wings moved forward a bit to gently wipe at her eyes before she magicked the door open and made to step out. Before she could do so though, Twilight called out to her.

"Princess, I... I'll be sure to send tomorrow's friendship report on time." She said with a soft, teary-eyed smile.

Celestia stopped and turned back to face her at that, giving her a little smile in return. "I'll look forward to reading it, Twilight."