The Replacement Letters

Dear Celestia

My grandma is crazy. She painted dots all over the kitchen wall, made me sing to some water, let a swarm of bees swarm around her, bites on pots and pans without buying them, talks to glass jars, thinks the school bullies are my sister's friends, and claims to have been alive hundreds of years ago. Maybe it's time we sent her to a home before she does something outright horrible, like accept a bribe from Spike to not tell us that he's mistreating our pets. If this town really was founded by us, then Ponyville would be called something like Appletown, or Zap City or something; plus we'd be wealthier than we are.

Applejack