The Best Joke Ever!

by narwhalunicorn

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Slice of Life, Comedy
Length: 1528

write this later

Pinkie Pie takes a try at stand up comedy.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-02-15 00:53:12 UTC

Chapter 1

"Helloooo, Fluttershy!" a jittery pink earth pony yelled happily while knocking repeatedly on a wooden cottage door. The pony bounced about happily, a large smile upon her face. Her curly messy hair shook vigorously with her excited hops, and her frosting covered coat had a sweet sugary scent.

A slight opening in the door stopped the thrilled baker's hops, and a few strands of pink hair peaked out of the door way. A timid yellow pegasus opened the door wider and revealed her plush, soft face. Her deep blue eyes looked up to her excited friend and a small smile appeared on her face. "Yes, Pinkie?" she whispered quietly, brushing a few strands of hair away from her eyes.

Her hyper friend replied flamboyantly, "Mr. and Mrs. Cake told be to baby sit Pound Cake and Pumpkin Cake while they were out last night, -- which was really, really fun! -- but then when they got back super duper late, and they told me about this really funny standup comedian they went to see! And then I thought, if this pony can make ponies laugh, why can't I? So I went over to Light Bulbs and Toothbrushes and got this gigantic spotlight and I'm going to go make a special room just for Mr. Spotlight!"

"Oh my... How much did that cost you, Pinkie?" Fluttershy said with a concerned look in her eyes.

"Only four months of celery!" Pinkie giggled, clapping her hooves and smiling happily.

"Umm... Don't you mean salary?" Fluttershy asked quietly.

"Nope! So then Larry the light bulb cashier pony said that if I bought a box of cereal and celery, it would be half off! So I bought the celery cereal with my celery salary and got some cereal and celery for my salary payed spotlight! Yippee!" Pinkie Pie said overjoyed, jumping into the air excitedly.

"Soo...?" Fluttershy asked confusedly, opening one eye wider in confusion.

"I'm going to do standup comedy! And youuu'rrre invited!" the happy party pony squeaked in delight.

""I... I am?" Fluttershy asked, rubbing her hooves together nervously. "I've never watched standup comedy before. What's it like?"

"Never watched standup comedy!?" Pinkie asked. "How? It's so funny fun fun funnnnn!"

"Okay... I might like it, maybe..."

"Oh, Flutters! You'll absolutely completely totally love it! I'll stand up on a stage, smiling down on you and the rest of the crowd, and then I'll tell a few jokes, and you'll laugh because they'll be really hilariously funny ones! And then I'll leave for a moment, and you'll ask for an encore, so I'll come back and tell one last amazingly funny joke that I made up myself! I can't wait!"

"Oh, umm.. okay," Fluttershy nodded her head to confirm.

"Great! So meet me at Sugarcube Corner and I'll bake you all some cupcakes and then you can watch some standup comedy. Yay!" Pinkie Pie eagerly smiled with glee.

Five ponies stood around the entrance of Sugarcube Corner, waiting for their friend to open the doors and let them into her comedic lair. She had apparently invited all of them so that they could watch her 'very, very special amazing standup comedy routine of ultimate fun!'.

Among the ponies stood Fluttershy, who snook glances at the cookie designed doorway of her friend's family bakery. "So.. umm... why do you think Pinkie was so excited to do standup comedy?" the shy pegasus asked her four closest friends.

"Why only Celestia would know, dear, but I'm just quite shocked that she would make us wait out here in the cold! We all came on time, did we not? But still, must we wait?" sighed an impatient unicorn, tapping her white, polished hoof onto the hard cement.

"Ah reckon that you're just a mighty bit impatient, Rarity," retorted Applejack, rolling her eyes at her sophisticated friend, "It just ain't that bad; it's only been about five or so minutes, anyway."

"Well, I think that we still shouldn't have to-" Rarity started, only to be interupted by a door slamming into her face.

Pinkie Pie bursted out of the door, dressed in a luxurious velvet tuxedo and a microphone strapped to her collar. "Hellloooo, and welcome to the super, spectacular, most amazingest, specialest, best standup comedy day ever!" she giggled, throwing away her grammar with a smile upon her pink, happy face.

Rarity wiped the door dust from her mouth, let out a scream which could be heard all throughout Ponyville, and wiped her hooves over her face in an attempt to cleanse her features from the miserable dust of shame which had gathered on face and left just enough residue to give her nightmares. It hurt a little too, but she was far more concerned about the dirt than the pain.

"Aww, Rarity! You're so excited about the show that you can't even hold it in!" Pinkie said. "I can't wait to show you all! This is gonna be sooo funnnnn!"

"You just... you just..." Rarity stuttered.

"You can't even contain your sheer amount of joy!" Pinkie smiled obliviously.

Rarity wiped her hoof across her mouth for a final time, before standing up straight and nodding to her friend in a most elegant way. "Yes, darling. That's what it was."

"Ooo! Look, I have Cherriyodels!" Pinkie smiled, bouncing over to the cupboard and picking up a box of cereal.

"Umm... What the hay are Cherriyodels?" Rainbow Dash lifted her eyebrow and sniffed the box, highly confused.

"It's only the bestest best cereal ever!" Pinkie Pie giggled with glee, pointing to the cover of the box.

"But... I've never heard of them before..." Twilight said, examining the box thoroughly.

"Of course you haven't, silly; it's only for hungy yodeling ponies! Like me!" Pinkie Pie bounced about grabbing a spoon and bowl from her kitchen.

"Ah think it's more for hungry crazy ponies, if ya ask me," Applejack tilted her head and muttered softly to Flutershy.

"Umm... Pinkie Pie? You yodel?" Fluttershy whispered, hiding her eye behind a lock of hair.

"Of course I do!" Pinkie said, pouring some milk into her bowl, "Why wouldn't I? Doesn't everypony yodel?"

"No..." her shy friend responded reluctantly.

"Remember when I was talking about the celery salary cereal that I got when Larry asked for my serial salary? Well, I gave him my celery as my salary and he gave me more celery and cereal! Cherriyodels is my celery cereal; it's made of cereal and celery and I bought it with my celery salary!" Pinkie Pie shoved the box into Fluttershy's face, and then opened the tab to pour bits of chopped celery and oats into her mouth, "Mmm... Yum!"

"So what about the standup comedy?" Rainbow Dash hovered above her energetic, cereal-obsessed friend, raising an eyebrow and crossing her hooves.

"Yes, I too would like to know what we all gathered here today for," Rarity elegantly concured, stomping a hoof lightly onto the floor.

planning

All of our productive thoughts:

Instead of it being Cheerios, we need a pun for the cereal brand. (Cherriyodels) Maybe Pinkie will be asked to do some stand up comedy, notice the first thing she sees is a box of cereal, and roll with it.

I also think that we should extend the joke. Because it's Pinkie, we should make her talk a really long time about the social system, and then, once he becomes a rich cheerio, Pinkie will explain how unhappy he is because he isn't in love. We can make him catch the eyes of a fair Cheerio lady, and talk about the months it took him to muster the courage to speak to her. Once he dates her, they will go to a fancy party. We'll spend a long time explaining all the details behind the party, and then, his date will ask for some punch. There will be no punch line.

I think she would invite them all to the party and have a secret room in her house reserved for doing stand up comedy. The room'll have a stage and a whole lighting system and stuff. What do you think?

I really expected him to realize in the end that the rich Cheerios get eaten first.

Random jumble of words to go somewhere in the story:

"Ooo! Look, I have Cherriyodels!" Pinkie smiled, bouncing over to the cupboard and picking up a box of cereal.

"Umm... What the hay are Cherriyodels?" Rainbow Dash lifted her eyebrow and sniffed the box, highly confused.

"It's only the bestest best cereal ever!" Pinkie Pie giggled with glee, pointing to the cover of the box.

"But... I've never heard of them before..." Twilight said, examining the box thoroughly.

"Of course you haven't, silly! It's only for hungy yodeling ponies! Like me!" Pinkie Pie bounced about grabbing a spoon and bowl from her kitchen.

"Ah think it's more for hungry crazy ponies, if ya ask me," Applejack tilted her head and muttered softly to Flutershy.

"Umm... Pinkie Pie? You yodel?" Fluttershy whispered, hiding her eye behind a lock of hair.

"Of course I do!" Pinkie said, pouring some milk into her bowl, "Why wouldn't I? Doesn't everypony yodel?"