My name is Rainbow Dash, but you didn't need me to tell you that, did you?
Bet you also don't need me to tell you I'm the fastest flier in all of Equestria, winner of the Best Young Fliers competition, the only person alive to do the Sonic Rainboom, a future Wonderbolt, and the Element of Loyalty to boot. Yeah, no need to say it, I'm awesome.
I'm also pretty good lookin', I won't lie. Don't ever tell anyone else I think that, though. I don't want them thinking I'm all girly or whatever. Nope, this girl is just proud of her nice body. I can feel all the boys staring while I go out training. It's funny, actually, since some of the boys who gawk at my nice ass or perky breasts know damn well who I was in flight school, and I know damn well who they get hard to at night. Seriously, if there's anything I learned, boys love lesbians.
Too bad for them, I'm straight.
What were you expecting? Did you think I like girls because I have rainbow hair? I got the hair from my dad, who, funnily enough, was a huge homophobe. Yeah, that's right, Rainbow Dash, the town gay, has never slept with a girl in her life. Actually, I might have kissed one while drunk at a party, but that's besides the point. I like boys. Say it with me, now. I. Like. Boys. And today, I'm gonna prove it.
I was walking around the main street of Ponyville, looking for my victim. Everyone seems to think it's so hard to find males in Ponyville. Not true. It's just they're all either busy working, training, or in their houses having private time. I just had to go find who was out and about. That, and who was single. Just for the record, girls can really really anal if you even get close to their boyfriend.
I scuffed the ground with my rainbow sneaker as I walked through the marketplace, magenta eyes scanning the crowd, naming off possible boys. Bulk Biceps? Ugh, no! Thunderlane? Cloudchaser is crushing on him hardcore, she'd kill me if I kissed him before her.