Author's Note

*DISCLAIMER*

Of course this is a mature story, only for mature audiences, so there's that in case anypony wasn't expecting WTF Moments.

You have been warned.

It's Just a Bit Bucking Strange

"So you're saying that I leave for what seemed like a little hour or two...and then you jump ship to whatever mare you can get close to next!? For Celestia's sake, she is an underaged mare...You should at least come after something your own age..."

The most awkward conversation had been going on for quite some time, both Trixie and Sweetiebelle arguing back and forward on this whole bucked up mess of a journey. We were all sitting side by side, in this pretty decent sized cart, the awful truth being that I had to sit in the middle between two nagging mares.

"Well I like him...and I don't care what you, Rarity, Celestia, or anypony thinks!"

Sweetiebelle said with a hoof on my knee, a blush and a nervous smile resulting with that statement.

"I love Orion..."

"Listen you little runt, I can assure you don't even know what love is! ..."

Trixie stops and waits on finishing her statement...Instead she turns to me with a raised eyebrow. I just nod back to her awkwardly, and she gets the hint.

"SHE DOES!? Uh!"

Trixie huffed and blushed, both disgusted and intrigued by this weird relationship I called, Sweetiebelle.

I couldn't help but notice Sweetiebelle trying to hold my hand with her hoofs, this causing a little unnecessary trouble...

"Get your hooves off my man!"

Trixie immediately began attempting to win me over, using her so called magic, and teleporting Sweetiebelle in the corner away from the two of us.

"Goddamnit, you two mares can't agree on something...Loving me!?"

I sigh aloud, fed up with this tiresome cycle of madness...The thoughts of leaving this place and ditching both these mares didn't sound like a bad plan...

++++

"You know you're good when you alter the universe, get rid off Orion and still are depressed..."

Spike loudly said to himself, continuing to fiddle with the Doctor's Inventions held in the Laboratory. The Doctor had been in the room with Daisy all along, just Spike and his loneliness keeping him entertained.

"I should find that book Screwball keeps taking away from me...The Necronomicon? Yeah, that sounds about right...Then I can rule Equestria, and with everypony searching for Orion, none will be the wiser!"

...Spike and his crazy monologues...

++++

"You gotta be bucking kidding me, Ruby...You're telling me we lost Orion!? My ultimately most cherished figure!?"

Screwball said quietly, hoping Daddy Discord would not overhear this whole predicament.

"Oh c'mon Sis, you told me Dad doesn't even know about him...What's the big deal?"

...

"I'll tell ya! Now who will provide unlimited power!? What's to stop the three stars I created to just burn out!? Releasing all that Chaos and Love Energy!? Nope, can't have everypony either mating in Equestria or being eaten alive by Zombies."

...The weird truth was, the little horndog of a human kept things in balance, screwing other mares for fun...Slaying the Zombies just for the hell of it...

Good stuff.

++++

"Betcha didn't get eaten out by his tongue...That always makes me cum when he licks down there."

Trixie still continued to bother Sweetiebelle while I snooped around every little emerald, idol, and ancient deities that were held in this shack on wheels. I found a whole lotta useless shit! Goat's horns, eye of newt, maybe even some Dragon scales....All more absurd and peculiar than the rest.

"Hmm, well I think three times was enough, right Orion?

Sweetiebelle cutely said to me with a blush, I meanwhile continued to ignore the two mares and... just... kept...

SEARCHING!

The horrid book had returned, a pale dead brown cover with the gruesome markings of a face, it was the Book of the Dead. Fucking what? Did Trixie just trott up to a Library and check this out or what!? I was almost certain Screwball would have control over where this Spellbook spawned.

"Trixie, babe? Where did you find this?"

...

"Oh, nowhere special...It was just floating around in my banishment to the spiritual plane...Nothing too much for my Orion."

A sudden hug by Trixie causes me to drop the book, this glomp leaving me to lie on the floor...Next to Sweetiebelle and Trixie both closing in...

"Listen...I don't feel into it...Maybe just a cuddle?"

...Instead of listening to my reply, I sit there and gaze at Trixie removing all of her clothing material, cape and hat! She remain staring back at me, a smirk on her face.

"The Great and Powerful Trixie demands your undivided attention..."

Trixie said quietly, running her hooves up and down her fur as she made herself comfortable on my lap. Sweetiebelle too decided to be hooves on with me...

I honestly had no choice but to ditch these mares, I mean what else could I do!? Have filthy, kinky, sex?

Then it hits me...Of all the ideas to go with...I just had to choose this one... Necronomicon Time!

"From whence the time I came, I shall return, the storyline complete again!"

The true foolishness of my actions were unabided, I didn't know what to expect after reading the Time Spell, but damned if I didn't like the results...

+++++

Then, it was all over in an instance, the nighttime had turned to day, and as I look down to see my location, I find that I am back at the Library! Hopefully good old Twilight here...

"Aww, how did somepony sleep?"

...

The fuck is with her wings!? Is Twilight Sparkle supposed to have wings!? What the fuck is going on here!?

I remain quiet, almost speechless while I get a hug and a kiss from this now Alicorn Magician. All I can wonder is, when and what the hell is happening?

"I think I can explain that..."

The moment I hear Screwball's voice, I turn my head to see all the mares I had left...Derpy, Rainbow Dash, Vinyl, Lyra, Pinkie Pie, and Princess Luna...

"Well then...I must've had a terrible dream...Or something!"

I awkwardly say aloud, that causing everypony to come close for a hug on the bed. This couldn't be more confusing, I mean, did I leave the past behind that night? What about all the mess I made in the past?

Well, well, well...It seems that you may have fixed everything in a neat little envelope...Except for the fact that now we don't know where the Necronomicon is...and those stars I created are gone...Along with majority of my power...

Screwball continued to stare at me, using her words without speaking to me...

To keep things simple, Orion, you altered time using a paradox, and in the same paradox you altered time back to it's original form. The mares knew that you left, infact they recall you here one day, gone the next, and until now, the present time! That is actually one of the best ways to fix a whole lotta whooie...But it also means we have to start over all the fun...

"Fun! But Screwball does that mean...?"

I accidentally replied to Screwball out loud, instead of inside my mind...

"Yup! Does somepony wanna get pregnant!?"

Screwball finally said aloud using her mouth, the room quickly filling up with wide grins and a raised hoof...

Ahh, buck me...I can never leave this job...