Dangerously Motherly

by Mutzetrager35

Rating: teen
Tags: Spike, Random, Adventure, Princess Celestia, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 2262

Celestia is one creepy individual, to outside forces. Unfortunately, our protagonist, a Griffin spy, finds out the hard way.

Celestia is one creepy individual, to outside forces. Unfortunately, a Griffin spy finds out the hard way.

Our protagonist, Felix Thalberg, gets caught spying on Celestia in an important meeting with all other foreign forces except the Griffin empire. To avoid death, or mental prison, he chooses the third option that is a mystery to the ponies.

Will he survive?

Published 2014-02-15 19:30:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-02-15 19:30:03 UTC

Chapter 2: Captivity.

Felix woke up in a bedroom. To be more specific, a childish bedroom thats big. A childish bedroom that's big and has no doors. Thankfully, he wasn't tied up anymore and could get up without a headache. Everything around him was a childish light blue that nearly made his eyes hurt, and to add insult to injury there was childish toys and child this and childish everything in the room.

It was starting to really tick him off that he keeps getting knocked out and being placed in a new place every time. Sadly, he couldn't be angry for long, as Celestia walked in from a hidden door in the wall that opened and closed behind her.

"I assume you're enjoying your punishment?" Celestia said as her horn glowed, but strangely enough, nothing happened that Felix could notice.

Felix tried to say something, but he couldn't for some reason. He could feel the vibrations and air from his vocal cords, but no sound. He grabbed his neck and held it, trying to make sound but he couldn't. This scared him and he tried to speak again, but all that came out where chirps and noises that griffin babies make.

"Oh; I forgot. Babies can't talk." Celestia said with a creepy grin as Felix started to shrink to a smaller size. He didn't know what else to do, so he tried to lunge for Celestia's neck to end this. He was too small, and as a result, he got caught in Celestia's arms. I am going to slap a bitch. thought Felix.

"Looks like someone's happy to see mommy!" said Celestia as she rocked poor Felix the baby in her arms. Felix was beyond freaked out, and started to cry. He didn't know what else to do but cry.

"Is someone hungry?" cooed Celestia as she magic'd some bottle out of nowhere, and promptly shoved it in Felix's beak.. mouth? To be honest, he didn't eat in a while, but he couldn't fight back the milk that came in. Celestia fed him for a few moments, and put a diaper on him shortly after. She put him on the ground to do baby stuff, but he just sat there with a murderous look in his eyes. (For a baby, at least.)

"Unfortunately, I can't spend time with you, so I have a babysitter here for you. He'll be here in about 30 minutes, so don't hurt yourself." Celestia said as she walked out. Too bad I can't kill myself. Nothing in here looks hard enough or small enough to choke on. But... wait. Babysitter? Ah, shit. thought Felix. 5 minutes later, he finally got up and crawled around, trying to find something to do that wouldn't bore him to death. He found a pile of those letter blocks, and started with those. He picked one up, put it down, said something babyish, and went to explore more.

What was neat of the room, is that it was kind of like a mini apartment. There where certain areas, like a faux kitchen, a faux living room, and some other stuff. Felix guessed this was some kind of royal nursery. Either way, it sucked having to be a baby, despite being one for a short while. Felix was sitting on some mini couch he assumed was for babies, and waiting there patiently while messing with a rubber duck.

Like Celestia said, a half hour passed and someone new walked into the nursery. This time, it appeared to be a dragon. The dragon was a baby- like him, in a way. The dragon had purple scales and green spines. He also had green eyes, like Felix.

"Hi, little guy! I'm Spike!" said the dragon. Felix looked up at him, as if that was one of the most stereotypical dog names ever. Funny, because Spike looked at Felix with a dog look in a way.

"I bet you've been bored, huh?" Spike said. Felix nodded. Yes, definitely bored, as if nothing exciting happened at all. Felix thought. Spike then pulled out some small sack from fucking nowhere and started rummaging through it. He then got out a blue (ugh) ball twice the sack's size and bounced it a few times, then nodding and passing the ball tenderly to Felix.

"You'll like this! Celestia said I had to get'cha something so here's a ball! Neat, huh?" Spike said.

Felix looked at him incredulously. First, because he's talking to him like a real person, and second, because he thinks a ball is a good gift. Then again, I am a baby now. thought Felix. Felix then chirped and bounced it around, trying to get Spike to go away. Thankfully, Spike then started walking around while keeping an eye on Felix. Spike set his impossible sack somewhere on a counter out of Felix's reach, and then started to play with Felix. Felix actually had a little fun, despite being trapped in a baby griffon's body and having to deal with Celestia's mom fetish.

This went on for a few hours, while Felix and Spike did different stuff. Felix then felt really tired, and let out an audible yawn. Spike took note of this and cleaned up quickly before picking Felix up and taking him to his seemingly big blue crib.

"Nice meeting you, lil' guy. Sweet dreams!" said Spike as he tucked Felix in awkwardly. Spike then picked up his sack and walked out the hidden door. Felix noticed that Spike pressed a button way out of Felix's reach before he went out, and Felix assumed there was an open button. Thus began Felix's plans for escape. The baby griffin yawned and fell asleep relatively quick.

When Felix fell asleep, Celestia came in just a moment later and watched him all night. Poor Felix.

Chapter 1: The conviction.

You're stupid if you think I own My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, this is freakin' fanfiction. FAN.

It was dark in the air vents, to ponies, at least. Felix, a griffin spy hired by the griffin king himself, waited in anticipation for the meeting to start. He was silently watching for movement out from ceiling vents, waiting for someone to come in. A minor draft of air came and ruffled some of Felix's feathers and some of his grey fur. Felix huffed and started to fix some white feathers on his eagle head, in the surprisingly roomy air vents. He was in there for a reason, and that reason was to find out if the Equestrian forces where going to backstab the Griffin empire, since they didn't invite them to this meeting, despite nearly every other country leaders where coming.

Suddenly, the doors swung open as the country leaders where heading in- including Celestia and Luna. Now was his chance. Felix grabbed his tape recorder and put a microphone up to the vent grate. Almost all of the major country leaders where there, including the changelings and minotaurs and several others. They all sat down at a mahogany conference table in the middle of the big room.

"I'm glad you all could make it! Well, except for the griffins, because they weren't invited!" Celestia said as she giggled softly, along with everyone else chuckling with her. Felix nearly gasped, he would've too, if it weren't for him having to be silent. He watched in anticipation.

"Those griffins are such spoilsports, yes? They're so up stuck and pompous..." said the Minotaur president. Felix growled, but not loud enough for them to hear. Though, he saw Celestia's ear twitch when he did so, and even bent over to whisper something to her sister who was sitting beside her, inaudible to everyone else. That shut him up, because it was not part of the job to be found out.

"Mmm, yes, indeed. But we're not here to talk about those feather brains. We're here to enjoy being around each other and chit chat, mm?" said Chrysalis. Everyone else nodded in agreement.

"Remember that time when everypo-one- thought that you where going to take over my country? They where so shocked!" Celestia said. Everyone in the room, except for Queen Chrysalis, looked at her like she was fucking insane.

"Yes, and it looked like we where going to duel to the death! Ha, good times. How is your fascism doing, recently? It seems you have to picked up on it, there." Chrysalis replied.

"Yes, that was an experiment of about 200 years ago, my subjects never even questioned it." Celestia replied, looking amused. Everyone else in the room stared at her even more. Things where awkward for a moment, but then the Diamond Dog king broke it and started a conversation. Things where less tense from there on out.

She did what? I thought that was a normal pony thing! Felix thought. An hour passed as the leaders of the countries chatted, and Felix got a lot of information down. Just as he was about to stop recording, everyone in the room stopped talking immediately, and started to walk out, except for Celestia and Luna.

"Sister, it seems we have a spy." Luna said. Oh shit.. thought Felix as he started to back out. Celestia took note of the noises from the ceiling and ripped off the vent grate with freaky pony magic. Felix could feel the air breeze starting to pick up as he tried to back out, but he was starting to be pushed towards the vent hole.

He could hear the laughing of Celestia and Luna as he fell down from the ceiling and landed on the ground with a thud. He scrambled up and threw off the recording equipment to ready himself for battle, but it never came. Felix Thalburg stared at the two rulers of Equestria, as they grinned at him. Celestia walked up, while using some sort of sleeping spell on him as he fought to stay awake. As he fell on the floor, before he was knocked the fuck out, he could hear Celestia say "Sweet dreams, my young one."

Felix woke up in what looked like to be a big room, with a massive headache. He was in the center on a circular platform surrounded by a pit that was pretty deep. The room was pretty big and there where ponies everywhere. He noticed that he was chained up, meaning he couldn't use his talons or wings to escape. Nearly all the eyes from everyone in the room where on him, as they watched him slowly get up. There where murmurs and whispers, and it started to get on Felix's nerves. He stumbled a little, struggling to get up with the chains constricting him. The headache slowly subsided as his vision began to clear up even more. When he regained his sight, he recognized the room as a court. He was beyond confused now, suddenly he was in court?

"Court is now in session!" yelled some random guard.

"You, Felix Thalburg, are convicted of spying on our ruler in an international meeting, Celestia!" said some stereotypical looking pony judge that was on a tall looking podium in front of him. Everyone else in the room gasped in shock and horror.

"What say you, criminal?" said the judge. Felix cringed when he said criminal. Everyone in the room glared at him more hatefully, now. He assumed ponies really loved to antagonize criminals.

"Hey, you're supposed to say something that would prove you innocent." said a pony dressed in a suit that Felix didn't see behind him. Felix thought that he was his lawyer, Felix looked at him for an awkward few seconds then looked back up to the judge.

"I plead guilty?" said Felix. The lawyer pony sighed.

"Since you plead guilty, Celestia has offered to give you a choice of your punishment! You may choose death, by jumping in the pit below you, or a 1000 year mental prison, or the mystery option!" said the Judge. Everyone except Felix gasped when the judge said mystery option. Felix thought for a moment.

"Er, what is mental prison?" Felix said.

The judge looked at him directly now, and said "Mental prison is when we lock you up in your thoughts, for what will seem 1000 years to you, but mere minutes for us." said the judge. Felix thought for a moment, then decided against it. He didn't want to turn insane, or die, so he decided on the last option.

"I choose the mystery option." said Felix. The judge looked surprised at that.

"Are you sure? Nopony knows what the mystery option is!" said the judge.

"If I'm not going to die or go insane, I'll choose it." said Felix.

The judge looked to be hesitating for a moment, and he scribbled down some stuff on a paper before nodding and handing some papers to a guard. The guard trotted off out the court.

"You, Felix Thalburg, are hereby sentenced to the mystery option! Court is dismissed!" said the judge. Everyone started to get up and get out of the room while talking and murmuring stuff to the people around them. Felix gulped as he felt a knockout spell take over as he fell on the platform, asleep.

Author's Note

Bewaaare, you're in for a scaaare.

What will happen to the protagonist? The title is your only hint.

I don't expect much to be thought of for this story, so I am just going to expect the worst.

If you want, leave a comment and some criticism would be appreciated.