The Bliss of Ignorance

Chapter 1: Prank

Shadows danced across the basement floor, the room illuminated by nothing but a few pitiful torches on the walls and by Twilight’s horn. In the centre of the room, right in front of her, stood a table covered with scientific-looking tools and numerous flasks of multicoloured liquids.

Just a little to the left, Twilight, a little to the left... Pinkie Pie snickered, crouching behind a few boxes by the stairs. She’d been stuck there for quite a while now, an hour at least, but all the waiting was finally going to pay off. Twilight’s horn stopped glowing and her hoof landed on a little blue box. About time she used it. I need to visit Applejack today too;I have a schedule to keep! Pinkie’s eyes tracked the small container as it neared one of the flasks, like the eyes of a kitten following a ball of yarn, while Twilight’s magic kept scribbling something down on a sheet of paper.

Yes, Twilight, now go on, try adding it... Twilight leaned in and tilted the box. Instead of the sulphur that the box’s label claimed it to contain, however, small particles of something unidentifiable filled the air.

“Surprise!” Pinkie jumped up from her hiding place.

Twilight gasped, inhaling the particles, and sneezed right onto her concoction. As her hoof rose towards her mouth, it tipped over the flask and flooded the various notes she had lying there. “No. No, no, no, no! Achoo!” Twilight started pulling the papers, glassware and equipment from the table.

“Sneezing powder! You didn’t expect that, huh? Did ya? Did ya?” Pinkie hopped closer, putting her hoof on Twilight’s shoulder.

Twilight shook it off, glaring at her. “What are you– Achoo! Sneezing pow– Achoo! Pinkie, you can’t be ser– Achoo! Help me with this!”

“Come on, Twi. It’s just a lil’ bit of a mess; nothing a bit of drying in the sun wouldn’t fix.” Pinkie reached towards one of the wet notes. “Look, I’ll–”

“No! Don’t touch it!” Twilight caught Pinkie’s hoof and then shoved her away. “Are– Achoo! Are you blind?”

“Blind?” Pinkie frowned and looked at the table again. Some strange, whitish smoke started lifting from the liquid, which hissed like water falling on a red hot cooking range. “That’s some weird stuff you have there.”

“It’s a strong acid! Achoo! My research, it’s all rui– Achoo! How do I stop this stupid sneezing?”

Pinkie gulped. “You... You have to wait for a few minutes. Then it goes away.”

Twilight motioned towards the expanding puddle on the table. “I don’t have a few minutes!” She started levitating a large stack of notes away, but sneezed again and watched as they fell right in the middle of the mess. “No!” She reached towards them, but Pinkie pulled her away in time.

“I’m sorry, Twilight. I didn’t know you were working with something so dangerous.”

Twilight took a deep breath before running back to the table and continued her rescue efforts. “No, you didn’t, and you still don’t! Achoo!”

“Of course I do. You already told me, silly!”

Twilight growled, her hoof thudding against the table. “No, you don’t! Do you see that flask I put down first?”

Pinkie looked on the ground and saw a small glass of something orange. “Uh-huh.”

“Well– Achoo!” Twilight wiped her muzzle. “Well that” – she pointed at the flask – “is a strong explosive. If I’d knocked that one over– Achoo! If I’d knocked that one over, we’d both be seriously injured or... or worse!”

“Oh.” Pinkie bowed her head. “I’m sorry. I just wanted to play a little prank on you. You know, to lift your mood.”

“Well good job!” She rolled her eyes. “I couldn’t be happier!”

Pinkie lift her head and smiled. “Really?”

“No! I can’t believe this.” She paused. “Huh, no sneeze. Still, couldn’t you see I was in the middle of an experiment?”

“Well, I did.” Pinkie scratched her head. “But you also seemed awfully lonely and glum. I mean you’ve been locked in here the whole day. I didn’t think–“

“Didn’t think what? That I wouldn’t mind having my sulphur replaced with a stupid sneezing powder? That I wouldn’t mind, even if the solution was stable, adding it to the flask and wasting a whole day of research?”

“I hadn’t thought about that.”

“Exactly!” Twilight threw down the last, wet remains of her notes and scoffed as they began to hiss and disappear before her very eyes. “That’s the problem with you, Pinkie. You don’t think!”

“Of course I do. If I didn’t think, I couldn’t have thought out this prank.”

“Oh, give me a break! This childish nonsense hardly counts – tell me, when was the last time you thought about the consequences of your actions? When did you ever stop to think before doing something?”

Pinkie looked down at the ground.

“You haven’t, have you? Just like I thought!”

“W-well, that’s not true!” Pinkie looked back up. “I do think about stuff, I just can’t remember the last time.”

Twilight sneered. “Yeah, right. Can’t help you with that, but I can at least tell you about the last time you didn’t think – it was exactly when you went ahead and destroyed a whole month of my work!”

“I already said I’m sorry. You don’t have to be so mean!”

Twilight took a deep breath again. “You’re right, I shouldn’t have said that. Sorry. But... a month of work!” She leaned against the wall and slowly slid onto her rump. “Pinkie, I need to calm down a bit. Please, leave me alone for now, or I might say something even worse.”

Pinkie nodded, her ears drooping. “Are you sure you don’t want me to help you clean up?”

“I still need to neutralise the acid; you’d only burn yourself. Please, just go. We can talk tomorrow.”

Pinkie plodded outside, looking behind at Twilight several times. She stopped by the basement’s door and cleared her throat. “Twilight, you know I do think, right?”

Twilight stared at her silently.

“Right?”

“Of course.” Twilight cracked a smile and waved her hoof. “But now go. I’m really not in the mood for more talking.”

“Okie dokie lokie!” Pinkie grinned and closed the door. There, her grin turned upside down. She might think she’s smart, but it takes a lot more than smarts to fool Pinkamena Diane Pie! She trotted towards the Sugarcube Corner, kicking a rock which happened along her path. She doesn’t think I think at all!

“Hello, Pinkie.” Mr. Cake stood in the kitchen, kneading dough. “Why the long face?”

Pinkie moved right past him, climbing the stairs by three at a time, and locked herself in her room. There, she collapsed on her bed and let out a loud groan. After a while of lying there, she lifted her head and furrowed her brow. Well, Ido think when I want to, and guess what? I’m going to prove it by thinking harder than ever before!