Not quite what I had planned...

by Blissey1

Rating: mature
Tags: Sex, Fetish, Discord, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Cadance, Comedy
Length: 1647

Discord's plan to send Twilight to the ends of Equestria in order to prove that they really are friends has worked out spectacularly! Or at least, he thinks it has. But even the Avatar of Chaos wasn't expecting the Tatzlwurm...

Discord's plan to send Twilight to the ends of Equestria in order to prove that they really are friends has worked out spectacularly!

Or at least, he thinks it has. But even the Avatar of Chaos wasn't expecting the Tatzlwurm...

Published 2014-02-21 05:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-02-21 05:30:01 UTC

Chapter 1

Discord was dancing a little jig. “I can't believe it! She actually did it!” He began sliding around on the dirt like it was polished marble on a pair of socks he hadn't been wearing a moment earlier. “Twilight actually went to the ends of Equestria, just for me!” He dropped to his knees and a bouquet of roses appeared in his hands. “She likes me! She really likes me!”

His escapades were interrupted by a loud, resounding boom from behind him that made the ground shake beneath him. “Hmm?” He stood up and turned around.

Lying on the ground in the middle of a settling cloud of dust was a creature he had never seen before. It was some kind of gigantic worm, with a body of pink and a purple head. As Discord stared at the creature, it slowly rose and turned to look at him with six beady eyes. Discord’s eyebrows scrunched together. “What in the…”

“RAAAOOOOOOWWWRRR!!” the monster roared out, and lunged at Discord, tentacles reaching out of its mouth towards him.

“GAAAAHHHH!” Discord screamed in surprise. He snapped his talons, and the worm froze in place, one of its tentacles less than a foot away from his face.

Discord clutched at his chest with a paw. “Sweet Celestia's teats, my heart!” His paw gripped a patch of fur and pulled, and his chest opened up like a kitchen cabinet. He reached inside with his talon and pulled out his heart, which was beating frantically. “Shh, shh, it's okay, daddy's all safe now…” he whispered as he gently stroked his heart with his paw. The frantic beating slowed until it finally resumed a normal pace. “That's a good girl… Back in you go!” He placed his heart back in his body and closed his chest.

“Goodness, I haven't had something spook me that badly in centuries...” He looked back up at the giant worm, which was still frozen in place. “Now just what exactly are you supposed to be, anyway?” He walked around the creature’s head, a talon stroking his beard as he took a closer look at the worm. “Hmm… I've definitely never seen anything like you before...” He threw up his arms in disgust. “I swear, I spend just a century or two encased in stone and whole new species pop up!”

He examined the monster for a few more moments. “Well, this was an interesting little distraction and all, but now I'm curious what happened to my two pretty pony princess nursemaids. Outa the way, you!” He waved his paw, and the worm’s head was thrown backwards into the ground, causing the rest of its body to roll onto its side.

Discord started looking about, but his gaze was immediately drawn back to the worm creature. Halfway down the worm's underside, there was a small bulge that was wriggling about slightly. He raised an eyebrow. “Hmm? Now what could that possi… bly…” His eyes slowly widened and his jaw dropped open. “Noooooo…” He limply raised a talon to point at the bulge. “They didn't get…” He turned his stunned stare and talon to the worm’s head. “You actually…”

His gaze switched back and forth between the worm’s head and the bulge in its belly a few more times before he finally closed his mouth and his arm fell limply to his side. “Well,” he said to himself, “this little plan of mine has certainly gone off the rails, hasn't it?”

He walked up to the slightly moving bulge. “I do hope that they're okay…” He was pretty sure that they were, since the bulge was still moving, but he was still genuinely worried. He didn't think even Fluttershy would ever be able to forgive him if he had inadvertently gotten her best friend digested by a giant monster.

He pulled a giant squeegee out from behind his back and slid it across the bulge, turning the creature's skin perfectly transparent. His eyes bugged out of his head and the squeegee fell to the ground. The bulge was indeed Twilight and Cadance, but they weren't being digested as he had feared. They were being assaulted not by stomach acids, but by tentacles.

The two princesses were squished together, belly to belly in the worm's stomach. Twilight’s face was buried muzzle deep in Cadance’s cunt. Snaking around Twilight's horn was a thick black tentacle that disappeared into the pink alicorn’s ass.

His gaze moved to the other end of the pony pair, where the same tentacle was forcing Cadance's jaws wide open as it exited her mouth. It then looped straight around to plow into Twilight's back door. Twining around that tentacle were two more that were vigorously ramming into Twilight's twat, stretching it out wider than looked healthy.

Looking back to Twilight’s head again, Discord realized that the purple princess wasn't willingly eating out her sister-in-law. It was just that same tentacle, going all the way through Twilight just as it had Cadance, coming out of Twilight's mouth and thrusting as deep as it could into Cadance's folds. Twilight's face was simply getting dragged along for the ride.

Twilight was clearly distressed, but if Discord was reading Cadance’s face right, and he liked to think that he’d become quite skilled at reading ponies over his thousands of years, the pink princess was actually enjoying herself.

Discord continued to stare open mouthed at the scene before him. “...Definitely not what I had planned…” he muttered to himself. He watched a few more moments and a small smirk appeared on his face. “...I think I like this creature!” A few more moments and his smirk turned to a frown. He let out a sigh. “I suppose I should probably help them out. It’s what Fluttershy would want me to do…”

He cleared his throat and tapped on the side of the worm with a talon, causing a clear, sharp tapping noise. “Pardon me, ladies, but you two wouldn’t happen to be in need of some assistance, would you?”

Cadance didn’t respond, but Twilight opened one eye just a tad. When she saw who it was, her eyes shot open in a mix of anger and pleading that Discord had never seen on a pony before. She was forced to close her eyes again a moment later when a particularly powerful thrust of the tentacle coming out of her mouth shoved her face right into Cadance’s crotch.

“...I shall take that as a yes!” Discord said. He snapped his talons, and both of the mares suddenly appeared on the ground beside him. Their manes and tails were matted against their bodies by some kind of slimy fluid, and they quickly began coughing up the same liquid.

Twilight recovered first. She shakily rose to her hooves and turned to glare at the draconequus. “Discord…”

Discord was pretty sure that her eyes were literally glowing slightly. The last time he had seen a glare like that was when Luna and Celestia first confronted him all those years ago. He took a step back and raised his arms in front of himself. “Now, before anypony does anything hasty, I just want you to know that I swear this was not what I had planned. I had no idea that something like this creature even existed!”

“Now… don’t be too hard on him, Twilight…” Cadance said while still trying to catch her breath. “It wasn’t all that bad. I could think of worse ways of spending my vacation from the Crystal Empire.”

Twilight’s anger turned to shock as she turned towards her sister-in-law. “What?”

Cadance got up to her hooves. “I thought that this was actually an exciting change of pace from life back at the Crystal Empire. Don’t get me wrong, Twilight. I really do love your brother with all of my heart, but there’s only so much that a single stallion can do to keep a mare like me satisfied.”

“Cadance, you can’t be serious!” Twilight shouted. “That thing violated us in ways that I didn’t even know it was possible to be violated!”

A dreamy smile appeared on Cadance’s face. “I know, wasn’t it amazing?” She giggled at Twilight’s incredulous expression. “Really though, Twilight, as the princess of love, I’m always open to new sexual experiences, and this was easily one of the best I’ve had in a long time.” She trotted up to the worm and lovingly placed a hoof against it. “I’m definitely going to have to remember that this creatures lives out here. I just might come back again some time!” She gently slid her hoof across the creature’s skin. “Maybe I could even convince Shining to come with me…”

Before Twilight could stop herself, her mind conjured images of her brother and those tentacles. She started retching, though nothing came up since the tentacle had already cleared out her system as it went through her earlier.

Discord draped an arm over Twilight's withers. “There, you see, Twilight? It’s not all bad! Cadance liked it!” He was suddenly standing in front of her. “And, hey! Look at it this way! You wanted to spend today getting closer to your sister-in-law, and quite frankly, I don’t think it’s possible to get much closer than what you two just went through!”

“Ugghhh…” Twilight groaned as she collapsed to the ground. The emotional roller coaster she had been on, going from fear, to arousal, to anger, and then disgust, had finally left her completely drained. “Whatever, I don’t even care anymore…” she mumbled. “Would you just please take us back home?”

Discord gave an exaggerated bow. “Your wish is my command, madame!” He snapped his talons and the two ponies and one draconequus vanished into thin air.

Author's Note

Random idea I had.

Twilight's twat, Cadance's cunt... Alliteration is fun! Celestia's snatch, Luna's... Uhh... dang, I can't think of anything.