Finally

It was a brisk bright day. Friday morning at around six O' clock.Today I would finally go through with it after countless days and nights of planning. It was going to be the best day of my life. Alas, it is so close yet oh so far away. I got up and made sure my house was as clean as ever. All of the shelves were dusted, my bed was made, and not even a speck of dirt could be found anywhere in this glorious home of mine. I was truly lucky.

Once everything was in order I set off to start my day. I drove to work with the biggest smile on my face, ready to face any and everything that might have gotten in my way. Upon arrival I saw some familiar faces, almost as happy as myself. I walked inside and straight to my bosses office. I complimented his appearance and he returned it. He ask why I was there and I paused for a moment or two for dramatic effect. Then I shouted at the top of my lungs, "I QUIT." Then I shook his hand and bid him good day. On my way out I walked up to my co-worker, who I've had a bit of a crush on for quite some time now, and I gave her a great big kiss. Then i hugged her and apologized. She slapped me of course in retaliation but I didn't care, I was happy. I got back into my care and was off to my next destination.

Within half an hour I had finally arrived at my dear sweet mothers humble abode. She greeted me and invited me in. I gladly accepted and immediately sat down on the very comfy couch. It was very big, in fact it took up the entire back wall. We exchanged stories, for we haven't seen each other in over three months now and I was just basking in her presence for as long as I could. We talked for nearly four hours before it was time for me to take my leave. I didn't tell her about how I had just quit my job moments ago. I didn't want her poor old heart to worry. I kissed her on the cheek, gave her a great big hug, and departed. I'll never forget the joy I saw in her eyes that day.

It was about eleven-thirty when I got to the cemetery. I had some flowers in one hand and a picture in the other. It was of my dad and I when i was just a little kid. I keeled before his grave and poured my heart out. I told him that mom was doing great and that I missed him more than anything. After an hour or so I wiped my tears, laid the flowers on the ground, and taped the photo to his grave. I left feeling good knowing that he was in a better place.

I got home at three-thirtyish, unsure of what to do next. Again, so close yet so far. I made myself something to eat and contemplated how I would go about the whole thing. I looked at the clock. Not much time left..

I passed out and awoke at a quarter to seven. I thought about for nearly and hour, scared of what might happen afterwards. I finally came to a decision and decided to go through with it. I walked into the kitchen and grabbed my item of choice. It was a sharp knife, long and smooth with a very sharp point. I took off my blue shirt and prepared my self. I took several deep breaths. A few tears started to form in my eyes as I said my final goodbyes to the world i had grown up in and had learned to love, even if it wasn't mutual. With one last deep breath I rammed it straight into my heart with full force. I fell over onto my bed in shock, realizing what i had just done. I know my death was, probably, extremely fast but it felt like an eternity. It was the coldest feeling I have ever known. I felt as my very life was draining from my body. Nothing could have prepared me for that. With my dying words I said, "God take care of my mom for me, she deserves it, for I may just have killed her as well." I closed my eyes and then... nothing.