Foalishness

by Razalon The Lizardman

Rating: everyone
Tags: Diamond Tiara, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Silver Spoon
Length: 2758

A tale of how childhood naivety made way for an unusual friendship between two very different fillies.

When the 'true' meaning behind Diamond Tiara's Cutie Mark is revealed, the pink filly becomes concerned that the life she wants may not be what she'll get as an adult. When she goes looking for solace, it's found in the last place anybody would ever guess it'd be.

Written for the Everfree Northwest Fanfiction Competition.

Published 2014-02-28 20:20:09 UTC
Last updated 2014-02-28 20:20:09 UTC

No one's princess

The sky was bright blue with not a cloud in sight. Aside from the occasional light breeze, there was no wind to be had. It was the perfect day to be out and playing, which is what the Ponyville school foals were doing as it was recess. All across the playground Cheerilee’s students either played or chatted with their friends. One filly in particular had amassed a large group of foals around her; one who had a pink coat, a mixed white and purple mane, and a tiara Cutie Mark which looked exactly the same as the one atop her head, which she was showing off to the foals.

"Wow, Diamond," Alula said, "it's really nice."

Diamond Tiara flipped her mane. "I know," she replied with a snooty tone. "It really fits me to a T." She turned to look around at all of the foals. "By the way, you're all invited to my Cute-Cenera."

Everypony expressed their thanks to Diamond for a few moments.

"So," Cotton Cloudy said afterwards, "what does your Cutie Mark represent?"

Diamond Tiara stared blankly in thought for a moment before replying. "You know, I never gave it any thought." She tapped her chin and gazed upwards thoughtfully. "Though, I did find it strange that it looked the exact same as the tiara my daddy gave me," she said, pointing to the tiara resting upon her head.

"Maybe the mark knows your last name is Tiara, and it's meant to be a nametag?" Snips suggested.

"Yeah, that's what mine did," Snails added, gesturing to the snail mark on his flank.

"Uh, yeah right," Diamond stated sarcastically. "That's not even how Cutie Marks work."

"Maybe it wanted to give you a second tiara in case the first one went missing?" Tornado Bolt supplied.

Diamond Tiara scoffed. "I'd never lose my tiara."

"Hey!" exclaimed Dinky Hooves. "I bet I know what your mark represents!"

Everypony turned to the giddy little unicorn. "Oh really?" Diamond inquired, her tone both snooty and dismissive. "And what might it mean?"

Dinky stood proudly with her chest puffed out. "It means you're gonna be a princess!"

Everypony tilted their head in confusion, except for Diamond Tiara whose eyes went wide in shock. "Did you just say I'll be a princess?" she asked.

"Yup," Dinky confirmed. "After all, Princess Celestia wears a tiara, and now that she's back so does Princess Luna." She looked at the flabbergasted pink filly. "We have a future princess among us!"

All the foals stared mutely in response. After a few moments, however, Dinky's words settled into their little brains and they began crowding around Diamond Tiara even closer, singing her praises and bowing before her.

Diamond was too shocked to bask in the admiration and merely stared ahead blankly.

"Um, your future highness," Snips said, noticing Diamond's thousand yard stare, "is something wrong?"

All the foals stopped and backed away from the pink filly. Diamond didn't say anything at first, as she was lost in her thoughts mulling over what being a princess would mean for her.

If I was a princess, then I wouldn't get to take over Barnyard Bargains from daddy. I'd be stuck in Canterlot with all those snobby nobles and I'd have to listen to all of their complaints day in and day out. Getting to wear a real tiara would be nice, sure, but not if I have to help rule over Equestria in return. Ohhh, why is this happening to me? What did I do to deserve this? I don't want to be a princess. I just want to live a simple life running my daddy's business and making him proud of me, which I can't do if I'm forced to listen to crybabies complaining over stupid things all the time. Ugh.

She stomped the ground. Why!? She stomped it again. Why!? And again. Why!?

"Um, is the ground bothering you, your future highness?" Cotton Cloudy asked her. "Because I'd be more than happy to tear it to shreds if you so wish."

Diamond Tiara realized she was making a scene and, her cheeks coloring red, stopped stomping the ground. She then looked up to all the foals and shook her head.

"I'm fine," she said. She waved her hooves in a shooing motion. "Just, leave me alone for now, okay? I need some time to myself."

The foals looked to each other and shrugged before turning to leave, making sure to express their thanks for being invited to Diamond Tiara's Cute-Cenera once again. Diamond tuned out their thanks, however, and began walking across the playground aimlessly, thinking to herself all the while.

Well, maybe being a princess won't be so bad. Yeah, maybe it'll be fun. All I'd have to do is look pretty and keep order throughout Equestria. Nothing too hard, right? . . . Oh, who am I kidding!? I'd crack under the pressure in a minute if not less! She turned to look at her tiara Cutie Mark. Why'd you have to be such a lamebrain Cutie Mark!? You should've known I wanted to run Barnyard Bargains; why not give me a Cutie Mark of a bit or something like that!? She took a moment to adjust the tiara upon her head before resuming her mental tirade. I mean, look at all the cool, non-lamebrain Cutie Marks all the other foals have! She turned her gaze to all the foals playing on the playground. See? There's a tornado. And there's an hourglass. And there's a pincushion. And there's a-

Diamond paused her inner ramblings upon sighting a filly sitting against the school's wall, alone, with a wooden box held in her hooves. She had a grey coat, silver hair, glasses, and a Cutie Mark depicting a teaspoon with a heart in the center. She was Silver Spoon, the social outcast of Cheerilee's class. Everypony was always too off-put by Silver's unusual love of old-timey things to attempt befriending her, which resulted in the grey filly staying isolated from the other foals and keeping entirely to herself during recess.

Diamond took a moment to wonder what Silver might've had in the box before shrugging and continuing with her walk. After only a few steps, however, a realization struck.

Wait a minute . . . princesses don't make friends with nerds. If I befriended Silver Spoon, then there's no way I could become a princess.

Satisfied that her plan was foolproof, Diamond made way toward Silver Spoon.

"Hi there," she greeted the grey filly as she approached.

Silver Spoon looked up from her box to Diamond. She then looked to her left and then to her right, as if to make sure there was nopony else Diamond could be referring to.

Diamond frowned and, very snootily, said, "Um, I'm talking to you."

Silver Spoon returned her gaze to Diamond. She stared blankly for a few moments before rubbing the back of her neck and sheepishly replied, "S-sorry, I'm just not used to being greeted out of the blue so often." She nervously chuckled.

Diamond rolled her eyes in exasperation and sat down next to Silver. "So, what's in the box?" she asked.

Silver Spoon glanced down at her box for a few moments, as if trying to decipher what about it made Diamond so curious as to its contents. Finally, she opened the lid and moved it so Diamond could look inside. She did, and saw that the box contained a whole set of fancy-looking silverware.

"Why am I not surprised?" Diamond whispered with a small smirk.

"They were a birthday present from my great gran-gran," Silver Spoon explained, bringing the box back over to herself. "According to her, this set dates all the way back to the late eighteen hundreds."

"Antiques like those must be worth a lot of bits," Diamond mused, looking up to the grey filly. "Why would you bring them to school?"

A deep blush adorned Silver's cheeks as she replied. "Well, the swings are always taken during recess, so I bring them here to give me something to do until class starts again." She closed the box and set it between them. "I don't plan on selling them or anything like that; I just like collecting silverware as a hobby."

She's just asking to lose them, Diamond thought to herself before replying.

"Listen, Silver, it isn't safe to bring those to school; who knows what somepony would do if they got ahold of them." She cast a few sideways glances around them as if checking for eavesdroppers before returning her gaze to Silver with a small, but genuine, smile. "If you need something to do until class starts again, we could chat or something."

Silver stared blankly in surprise for a moment before replying in just above a hushed tone, "Do you mean that?"

"Yeah," Diamond said, her tone now taking on the genuineness of her smile. "Like, totally."

"Well," Silver replied, still a little sheepish, "what do you wanna talk about?"

Diamond tapped her chin in thought. She let her eyes wander around the playground in search of anything of interest. All that stood out to her were the various Cutie Marks each of the foals had. She stared longingly at each of them, wishing she could switch her own mark with one of theirs'. Then her eyes came across a couple of earth pony fillies play tetherball: one was yellow-coated and had a red mane/tail with a bow and red eyes, while the other also had a red mane/tail but with a cream colored coat and glasses behind which sat violet eyes: Apple Bloom and Twist.

What drew Diamond's gaze, however, was the lack of Cutie Marks adorning either of their flanks. From this observation, Diamond began wondering if having no Cutie Mark was preferable to having an unwanted one. Judging from how happy Apple Bloom and Twist were as they played with the tetherball, that seemed to be the case. But Diamond Tiara wasn't sure. Luckily, she had someone to give her a second hoof opinion.

She turned to Silver Spoon. "Silver, if you didn't want your Cutie Mark, would you rather be a blank flank?"

The grey filly tilted her head. "What do you mean?"

"Well, anypony who matters knows that Cutie Marks represent what somepony is meant to be in life, or something like that."

Silver nodded. "Yeah, I know that."

"Well, take those two for example," Diamond continued, pointing toward Apple Bloom and Twist, the former of which had just gotten smacked in the face with the ball. "If you weren't happy with what your Cutie Mark represented, would you want to get rid of it and be a blank flank for life instead?"

"Of course not," Silver proclaimed. Diamond stared up in slight surprise as she continued. "I mean, I like my Cutie Mark perfectly fine, but even if I didn't, I'd still rather have it then be a blank flank."

Now Diamond tilted her head. "Why?"

"Because Cutie Marks are the one thing that makes each pony special; what sets them all apart. Taking that away makes you no different from everypony else without a Cutie Mark, and that's the most horrible thing that can happen because you have no special talent all to yourself."

Diamond stared blankly before pondering what Silver said. "I see what you mean," she replied before thinking to herself, As much as I hate my mark, Silver has a point. Being special in a bad way is preferable to being not special at all.

"Why'd you ask me that anyway?" Silver asked. She glanced down at Diamond's tiara Cutie Mark. "Are you unhappy with your Cutie Mark, Diamond?"

The pink filly froze instantly. Way to go, Diamond Tiara, you really messed up now. What'll she think of me if I say yes? If she learns what my Cutie Mark means, she'll start calling me a princess like all the other foals. Ugh, what do I say?

"Well," she said, trying her best to form a response on the fly, "I . . . was just curious." She grinned sheepishly. "You know, I just got my mark and was wondering what would've happened if I'd gotten a Cutie Mark more like one of theirs'," she pointed at some of the other foals around the playground.

Silver followed her gaze. "What's wrong with theirs'?" she asked.

"Nothing," Diamond replied, and glanced down at her tiara Cutie Mark; the rest of her speech oozed with snoot, "but this mark is obviously meant for me. I mean, it's exactly the same as this," she pointed to the tiara upon her head. "Can you imagine me with any other Cutie Mark?"

Silver looked up at the plastic tiara and nodded. "It really suits you, doesn't it?"

"I know," Diamond replied, having finally masked her previous discomposure.

The two then sat in silence for several moments, unsure of how to continue the conversation. Diamond Tiara's mind ended up wandering until she eventually found herself watching their fellow classmates across the playground, playing with each other like they hadn't another care in the world. Seeing the looks of utter joy on their faces made Diamond Tiara scowl in jealousy at first before she remembered why she'd approached Silver Spoon in the first place. She turned back to the grey filly who'd taken to twiddling her hooves in the meantime.

"Silver Spoon," she said in a very business-like tone gained from spending so much time with her father, "do you want to be my friend?"

The grey filly paused, then turned to her with a face that gave the impression a timberwolf had just asked for her hoof in marriage. "What'd you say?"

Diamond sighed in exasperation. "I'm pretty sure you heard me right, but just in case, 'do you want to be my friend'?"

Silver's mouth hung open as she stuttered incoherent syllables out in a failed attempt to answer. Diamond could only look at the scene in mild amusement as Silver slowly recomposed herself and managed to reply with her own question.

"Why would you want to be my friend?"

Diamond was about to mentally panic again as she still didn't want to reveal the truth of why she wanted to befriend Silver Spoon. Then she took a closer look at the grey filly; specifically, her eyes. They were the eyes of a pony who'd never been privy to true friendship, only able to speculate on what it felt like. Now that pony had been given a small sample of what friendship felt like, and she wanted more. It was enough to make Diamond Tiara take pity on Silver Spoon.

"I want to be your friend because . . ." Diamond took a moment to choose her next words carefully, as well as force herself through the sappy feelings she was invoking, "because . . . I know you want to be mine."

Once again, Silver Spoon was at a loss for words; Diamond Tiara was afraid she'd broken the grey filly. Suddenly, Silver suddenly lunged forward and wrapped her fore legs around Diamond's body in a tight bear hug. Diamond didn't even have time to be startled, and before she could even process what was happening she found herself struggling for air.

"OH, THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!" Silver practically screamed. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to be somepony's friend!"

Diamond squirmed a bit in Silver's grasp before the excited filly realized she was suffocating her new friend. She quickly let go of the pink-turned-blue filly, who returned to her pink color as she gulped in a large breath of air.

"Never *gasp* do that *gasp* again," Diamond Tiara warned.

Silver Spoon blushed. "Err . . . sorry," she said, "I'm just so excited to finally have a friend, you know?"

"It's alright," Diamond replied with a smile, her breathing returned to normal. "I forgive you."

"Alright, my little ponies!" Cheerilee called from the school's front steps. "Class is starting again!"

"C'mon," Diamond said as she got up before helping Silver to her hooves. "Let's show everypony how much cooler we are than them."

"We sure are!" Silver exclaimed, and the two joined all the other foals in making way toward the school.

As they walked, Diamond noticed most of the other foals were casting bemused glances her way, obviously confused as to why she was walking with Silver Spoon. She ignored them and happily strode alongside her new friend, all the while smirking.

I'm no one's princess.