Of mercenaries and.... Ponies?

Chapters

I Got It! (aka Scout's day)
The New Contracts
New Stuff, New Land, Same Old Saxxy people.
Welcome to My House Party!
Shoot First and Talk Later Pt 1
Trigger Happy Ponies. Pt 2
Coaching 101
From Night, to Day, and back!
The unexpected occurs, also known as, >:3 (Get in the car)
Secrets and Deceiving Others.
The Start of Something Something Evil.
The Battle of Stalliongrad --Day One; The Gryphon Brothel
BoS Day two: Getting you left foot wet.
BoS Day Three;The reveal
Discorasmus (BoS: Day four)
The Final Day (BoS: Day Five)
Playing With Danger, or doing the Rocket Jump Waltz
I Looooove the Conga!! Wooooooo!
The End of Line (When in Equestria)

I Got It! (aka Scout's day)

“I got it! I got it!”

Scout ran towards a small shed that was positioned between two farmhouses. The Mercenaries that fought here called it ‘Harvest’. But in reality, it was just another battlefield waiting to be claimed.

Scout reloaded his Baby Face Blaster while his agility made it easy to dodge the oncoming grenades coming from a RED Demoman. The battles that happen here tends to be intense, but today, it was tenfold of the average battle. Scout made it in the shed, but a RED Pyro had decided to shoot a flare from his Detonator, having it explode in mid-air, and engulf the Scout in flames.

“I’m on fire! Ow!” Scout screamed.

“No worries mate,” a fellow BLU Sniper threw a jar of Jarate at Scout, extinguishing the flames.

“Aw thanks pal. But next time, how about some water instead of your… well, piss.”

Suddenly, a RED Soldier appeared launching several rockets from his Black Box, killing the two team members.

“Aww crap,” Scout looked into his now dead self while awaiting his time to respawn, watching the RED Soldier do a taunt from his HUD. He never really got the idea of respawning. But then again, who was it to question the person who made all this weird technology? He could imagine how, but why? Although the other mercenaries told to not him question, he just couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe this was just for amusement between the two rivals. But then again, he had seen even more weird things than this, like Merasmus for example a couple of months back.

Alright, time to get back into the game. Scout respawned into the room, where he met a fellow Pyro, Heavy, and an Engineer. The room was small, but big enough to quickly grab things and go. Scout grabbed his Soda Popper, a couple cans of ‘Bonk!’, and his favorite, the Atomizer.

As he ran out of the room, he noticed BLU Demoman acting out of the norm. He decided to check it out, but as he did, the Demoman suddenly turned into a RED Spy and stabbed a Medic walking behind the Heavy. Scout fired a couple of shots, but missed. He decided to alert the BLU Heavy, but it was too late as he was stabbed in the back as well. Crap, might as well try and capture the point.

(……)

RED Spy didn’t want much, maybe a few backstabs here and there to get them out of the way. But all he wanted was to teach BLU Scout a lesson. Do not try to capture point while there is a Spy on the loose. More specifically, people like him for instance. Scout’s mother told him how rainbows made him cry. RED Spy mentally chuckled at that thought. That should teach Scout. I should do that next time I get him. He moved silently into a corner in the shed, waiting for his target, like a spider waiting for its next meal.

(….)

BLU Scout didn’t see where the RED Spy moved to, but it didn’t matter, there were more things to take notice of. Like that RED Sniper he just taken out with his Soda Popper. Scout moved to the shed and started to capture point. Things were quiet in here, maybe a bit too quiet. Scout was almost done capturing point when suddenly; his HUD showed that the RED Spy he had seen earlier had backstabbed him. There was also a small alarm showing, it had said that Scout being dominated by this exact same person. But the line was crossed at the next scene of events as RED Spy picked up his headset and said “Hello, this is Scout, and rainbows make me cry.”

Scout could see it now, all the other mercenaries on the team laughing at him for his fear of rainbows. Aaaand there goes my rep.

The RED team later captured the point and they had also kept it. The announcer mocked the BLU team as “You failed.” This was actually one of the times that they had actually felt badly for themselves for being a failure at this most intense battle that they ever had.

Later, as the team started to pack up for oncoming departure home, Engineer had set up teleportation pods, more advanced than the usual pads that the team would take home.

“Now, this here will take y’all home at the same time,” Engineer explained. “It can fit all of us an’ some.”

“So, vat you saying is zat we can all vit, and the same time, we can get home separately?” Medic said.

“Precisely,” Engineer smirked. “Now the only problem is that we have to share with the RED team, which is why that there seems to be enough room to fit two spawning areas.”

The whole BLU team suddenly went from what happened to be curious faces, to what looks like anger, and started to protest.

“Ye’ got to be mad!”

“Uuh, No!”

“I will crush puny skulls.”

“Hudda hmmpf hmmpf!!”

“No way in hell private!”

“Now, there’s no need to be alarmed,” Engineer hushed the protesters. “Contract says that we only battle on the field.” A few mercenaries nodded in agreement, but Scout was a stubborn one.

“Hey! What if they decided to shoot us on the spot?” Scout exclaimed.

“Then how else are they going to get home?”

There even more murmurs of agreement, although Scout didn’t believe Engineer, he decided to keep his mouth shut just so he might get a chance to say ‘I told you so’.

“Here they come!” Sniper said.

Just as he said that, there were the RED Mercenaries, walking towards them. They too, had the look of frustration at the fact they have to share the pod to get home. They slowly walked up to the BLU team and stayed silent. But the RED spy decided to have fun with Scout and gave him a teasing laugh.

“What’s so funny?” Scout asked.

“Oh it’s nothing,” RED Spy replied. “It’s just the fact that how can a confident little boy like you be scared of such petty things like rainbows?”

Suddenly, not only the BLU team looked at Scout, but also the RED team as well. Scout looked at all of them and then saw that everyone looked like they were going to burst into laughter, until RED Heavy decided to say something.

“Maybe he’s a little baby,” RED Heavy made a mocking crying face and then both teams erupted into laughter.

RED Spy patted BLU Scout’s back, who happens to be on the verge of tears. “We’re only joking around. You know that, right?”

Suddenly, Scout’s face changed into a look of determination. “Of course I did, what did you take me for?

“Oh nothing, just you being a little baby,” Spy replied. After that remark, the teams broke into laughter again. This time, it ended with the BLU Engineer telling everybody to get ready to head home. Instantly, everybody calmed down and then said farewell to each other because they had the rest of the week off.

Great, maybe this would be a perfect time to get some sleep in, Scout thought, and probably an attempt to get a girl. Scout took a look at this team, and sighed. Sometimes, I wonder what Pyro looks like underneath that. I’m pretty sure it’s a guy, but you can’t be too sure right?

There was a flash of light, and then the scene changed from a farm into a stereotypical suburban neighborhood filled with happy children and mowed grass. The children were curious on the sudden appearance of Scout, but they shrugged it off at the thought that he just came from a bus stop.

(Somewhere were quite the opposite was happening)

A lavender unicorn was powering up her horn to put a spell on a few stone orbs. Come on, work!

A dark blue alicorn laughed at her futile attempts, then she stomped her hoof on the ground, causing the stone orbs to crack and break into pebbles. “I am Nightmare Moon, and I shall rule Equestria!” Nightmare Moon laughed manically.

The unicorn turned to see her five newfound friends behind her. “Oh yea, well we don’t need the stones. I have the true Elements of Harmony here with me!”

As she explained how her five friends were the elements, Nightmare Moon was preparing a teleportation spell. But her horn was not even glowing as it would normally do, so the lavender unicorn took no notice to her plan. As the unicorn was going to use the unexpected launch of Happiness-And-Randomness-Most-Often-Not-Yearned (Or HARMONY), Nightmare Moon teleported out of the castle leaving the Elements of Harmony confused where she had went.

“Hey Twilight, where do yah think she went?” an orange Earth Pony asked.

“Who knows,” the lavender unicorn replied. “But wherever it is, we ought to find her before she does anything else.”

Author's Note

I know, I was being a bit harsh on Scout, but, you gotta pick on the youngest one right? I mean....

*Gets hit by a Boston Basher*

"Yeah right"

The New Contracts

“Hello Madame, how can I help my favorite customer today?” A store clerk grinned at the sight of the woman who usually appears every Saturday. She usually appears at about 3 in the afternoon every time. It would spook anyone else but to him it was just another loyal customer.

“I would like to buy some wood, a couple of flares, and a new propane tank,” She appeared to be a tomboy, but in actuality, it just happens to be some lazy dressing; a blue hoodie with a pair of jeans.

“Ahh,” the clerk sighed. “So that would be the usual order then? Well, I’ll tell you what, since you happen to be a loyal customer, I will just reduce the usual price by fifteen percent.”

“You don’t need to do that,” The woman waved her hand in rejection. “Just because I’m usually here, doesn’t mean you need to do that.”

“Well,” the clerk’s voice changed slightly. “A girl like you shouldn’t be treated like such, but I digress. So be it. The price is twenty dollars.”

The woman handed the clerk twenty dollars and left the store. I guess being a girl is good at times. At least my team doesn’t know that. If they did, would their perspective change on me? She paused for a moment. I doubt it, but I’m not sure about Scout. He seems to be looking at me more than usual. I ought to keep an eye on him.

Little did she know that as she got into her car, if she would’ve looked to the left towards a park, she would’ve seen that same very Scout getting chased by a dark blue horse with a horn and wings.

(……….)

His heart was pounding, his legs were burning, and he couldn’t stop running. He thought he had seen all the weirdest stuff ever, but this! This has topped the chart of all things strange and scary. It even topped the Pyro!

“Come here you human, I got something for you…”

He thought he just at least have one casual week with his brother at the park. But noooo, this wisp of dark-blue smoke had to appear and then materialize in front of him. He told his brother to run back home while he distracted it, but Scout just had to do things the hard way.

“It’s something you always wanted…”

At that remark, Scout paused for a moment, only to remember what he was being chased by and decided to run again. If it knew what he wanted, then it can just disappear, right?

Scout stopped, turned around, and saw nothing.

“So it can disappear just like that? I wonder what I was being chased by anyways.” He felt a tap on his shoulder, and then turned to see who it was.

“By me! Of course I can’t just disappear like that!” The creature exclaimed.

And then nothing more.

(…)

A man slammed the door into his kitchen, he ran upstairs, started to bang on his mother’s door.

“Mom!” the boy said. “Scout is being chased at the park!”

Only silence.

“Mom?” the boy was starting to become worried.

“Are you there?” He tried the door handle, only to his disappointment that it was locked.

“Hel-“ He was cut off when the door opened to reveal a tall slender man walking out of the room, buttoning his shirt, and straightening his tie.

“What seems to be the problem?” the man spoken after a moment of silence.

The guy started to explain, but was cut off again by the front door being opened and closed. He ran downstairs to see who it was and found Scout lounging on the couch.

“Bro!” the boy startled Scout who got up and hugged him. “What happened?”

“It’s ok, nothing bad happened, to me that is,” Scout patted the boy’s head. When Scout looked up to see who was coming down the stairs, he saw the tall slender man coming down. To him, Scout thought he looked familiar, the suit, tie, and even the color. He glared at him.

“Who are you?”

“You know me.” The man smirked.

Suddenly, the realization hit him. No wonder why he was so familiar. He grabbed his bat that was lying beside the couch, and then started to swing. The Spy quickly dodged the bat –smashing a vase –and then pulled out his Kunai. At the next swing of the bat, Spy caught it, giving the Scout a quick gasp of surprise. Spy then used the Kunai to give a cut to Scout’s leg, knocking him down and drop the bat.

“Had enough?” Spy then straightened his tie and started to walk out.

Scout just lain there on his back, thinking about what else could make this day anymore worse. But then he noticed that he smashed his Mother’s precious, expensive vase. He started to think about what would happen if she found he did it. But his thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door.

“Who is it?” the Scout’s brother asked.

“It’s for the person with the codename Scout.”

He got up from the floor and then opened the door. “What can I do you pretty lady?”

“It’s about your contract,” The woman started

This day just got a whole lot worse than it already has. Maybe she’s here to kill him after breaking a rule! Maybe she’s here to cut the contract and then kill him! Or maybe-

“You’re being assigned to a new company other than Mann Co.”

What?

Scout just stood there, not sure if his emotion is actually being shown, or he’s just standing looking dumb, but the woman handed him a clipboard she was carrying.

“You and you’re team are going to ditch your week off, and start packing instead, you’re most likely not coming back from this again.”

Those words almost paralyzed Scout from the inside out. “W-w-what do you mean?” He never felt fear like this ever before. Never coming back? But, he has his brother and his family to be with!

“It means you better sign it or you’re going to be terminated.” The woman looked at him with a stern and serious glare.

Scout signed the documents saying he is now the property of this new “company”. As the lady was starting to leave Scout asked what he would need to pack.

“A toothbrush, change of clothes, and your life, that’s it.” She got into a black sedan driving away from the house of the now saddened young adult.

Scout chuckled, “At least I don’t have to worry about that vase.”

(In the universe where the opposite is supposed to be happening.)

“Hey Twi, It’s been four years since Nightmare Moon disappeared.” The orange mare said. “Jes’ forget it. If she’s really gonna do something, it’s gotta be bigger than you becoming a Princess.”

“I know,” Twilight replied. “That’s what I’m worried about, if she appears again, would she stronger than before?” She looks around the library they were in. It looks a bit on the messy side.

“Ah’ wouldn’t worry about it if ah’ were you. For now, let’s jes’ worry about you, bein’ you.”

“Thanks Applejack. Got an idea on where Spike is at?” Twilight asked. He really needs to be here and clean up the place a bit.
“Ah’ think he’s with Rarity. Probably doing nothing but admiring about her.”

“You noticed that too?” Applejack looked surprised at the lavender unicorn.

“You mean to tell me that you haven’t noticed this til’ now?”

It was the unicorn’s turn to be shocked. “Wait-wait-wait, how long has he been doing this?”

“About the whole four years he’s been here.” The orange mare replied with a smug.

If the two ponies looked out the window of the library, they would’ve seen the same very pony (Or dragon in this case) running away from a group of three fillies with a dress for him to try on.

Author's Note

It sounds like the Pyro has an admirer, maybe then she can-

*gets hit by her Backscratcher*

"Maybe you can shut up."

New Stuff, New Land, Same Old Saxxy people.

Author's Note

WARNING:
This story has taken a turn and the unexpected may happen. This will probably be one of few chapters that would be incredibly long.

This is what I get when I type this at 1 in the morning. Stuff happens and hunger strikes.

New Stuff, New Land, Same Old Saxxy people.

Engineer was busy repairing the teleportation pad to get home. It was in a very bad condition, to the point of black smoke coming out from the main frame whenever it gets used. As Engineer pulled his wrench unto another bolt to tighten it, he couldn’t help but think about the next assignment they were handed. It was unusual, but the weirdest thing about it was that they were headed back to the site where they had gone before. He thought they were headed to new places like Japan, China, Europe, or even Antarctica! He never thought he would be filled with wanderlust even once in his life, but since he joined the BLU Company, it was just only New Mexico. It was very dull and just only sands everywhere. I wonder if everyone else feels the same, maybe even Heavy.

Engineer turned another bolt around in a one hundred and eighty degree angle, thus finishing the last bolt.

He looked outside and then his mini-computer on his wrist gave him a message. Here’s what it had said;
Dear members of the BLU Company,

You are to be sent to an area you know as Harvest. There, you shall defeat the RED Company in an attempt to own the land. This mission will be basic and simple, and thus shall be treated as so. We have a surprise waiting for thee, but you must keep your mind on the task at hoof- err, I mean hand. Capture the point and the glory shalt be thine.

-Signed by your boss.

Engineer looked at the message carefully, there seemed to be a bit of old English. Like something from an old story. Something about our new boss seems weird. Engineer thought. Seems to be on the crazy side, if he is, then we ought to be careful on what assignments he gives us.

Engineer carefully took apart the pads for easier storage. He knew that he had to get to Harvest fast, just so that everyone can be there at once and not be late. The Texan changed his mini-computer’s interface to where it was a map of where he’s heading. As Engineer packed his things, he took a look back at his home, remembering the lady’s message of telling him he won’t be back for a very long time, and then drove off into the dusty, gritty sands of the blazing midday.

(……….)

Sniper drove his van along the road and noticed an odd cloud standing in the middle of the grey sky. It was just standing there, although it should be moving like the other around it. But the weirdest part was that it had a yellow steak at two ends of it, like that of a blonde woman with long hair. Sniper shrugged it off at the fact that maybe he being delusional. He looked up again and saw that it was no longer there. See? Just a figment of your imagination, you can’t be suffering from anything right? He looked back at road and then slammed hard on the brakes. There, sitting at the road, was a large crate that had a logo imprinted unto it. The logo was something he had never seen, but Sniper was able to accurately tell what it said.

As delivered by Derpy the mailmare? Sniper scratched his head. Where did this crate come from? Sure as hell that it didn’t just appear here. I should’ve seen it while driving. Sniper took a look at his watch. A quarter past! Blimey! I’ve been here for way too long!

Sniper took another look at the crate, and decided that he should put it into his van for safe keeping. Or maybe open it right now! Sniper tried to hold back his excitement, but it wasn’t enough to prevent him from grabbing a crowbar and break open the mysterious box. As he popped off the lid, he noticed two things; first, the weapon design was different from any other weapon he has ever seen; and two, it had a glowing purple aura surrounding it. He came with only one conclusion about it.

“It’s an unusual,” Sniper whispered quietly. “I wonder what it does.”

At closer inspection, it looked like his regular sniper rifle, but it had a bit more of a cartoon touch; like something from Pyroland. Although he had the goggles, he currently didn’t have them on, and if he did, this fantasy is just too realistic. The Bushman felt around his face just to make sure.

Suddenly, he remembered that he was supposed to be at Harvest by now. Sniper quickly threw the gun next to his Huntsman, and then hopped to the wheel, speeding as fast as he can.

Several minutes later, he was greeted by the sound of explosions and gunshots that rang around the barren landscape. He knew that he was late, so he had brought all the weapons from his vehicle into the spawn room. BLU Spy was the first to see him rushing towards the small shed. He scoffed at Sniper for being unprofessional with his time, and openly told him that he should try the teleportation pads.

“I don’t need any help from those pads,” Sniper snapped. “I got my trustworthy Rover, and it’s going to stay that way.”

“Alright,” Spy pulled out his Dead Ringer. “Suit yourself, wouldn’t want you to be like Scout over there.” Then pointed to a corner where said person was.

Sniper chuckled at his remark and then looked at where Spy was pointing. There, he saw that Scout was rocking back and forth on the floor with his thumb in his mouth. In front of him was a scattergun, but it was sky blue with a design that was made up of a cloud and a rainbow lightning bolt. Sniper couldn’t tell if this was an accident, or if this was a cruel prank. The latter seemed more likely. The Australian walked towards Scout and then gave him a pat on the back.

“Hey there,” Sniper said. “No need to be worried.” He picked up the scattergun and then threw it to an opposite corner. Scout stopped rocking and looked up at Sniper. “There, you see? Gone. Now, let’s go, and kill the RED team!”

Scout stood up and then grabbed his weapons. He chuckled, “Yea, thanks pal. I think this is the second time I owe you?”

“Who’s keeping track?”

Scout ran out into the battlefield, with a new sense of determination. Yea, his dignity has been a bit crushed, but at least he no longer had to mess with that weapon. Scout shuddered at the thought of ever using that weapon. He thought it would be better to just use his fists if would mean that he would never touch it again.

(……)

Somewhere in the clouds over watching the battlefield, a dark blue alicorn was preparing a spell she has been attempting for a long time. The planning was perfect; the mercenaries wouldn’t even notice what was going on, the landscape wouldn’t change much, and soon, Equestria would be hers for the taking. She laughed at the thought of seeing many of the ponies falling into her hooves, bowing to her for her mercy, their petty attempts to have at least a glimpse of a sunrise, and the look on her sister’s face when she finds out the true meaning of her plans. Oh could this day get any better? She had planned for something bigger, but this is only a small-scale. Oh Nightmare Moon, can you get any cleverer?

She looked into the battlefield, and the first thing she finds is Scout running from a volley of rockets from a RED Soldier’s Black Box. The alicorn sighed; she has taken a liking for Scout, but in a sense for him to be one of her favorites. Then she looked towards a fleeing RED Sniper, who happened to explode from a Demoman’s Quickiebomb Launcher. Nightmare Moon flinched, she didn’t take into consideration how barbaric these humans are, but, a team is a team. Finally, she took a look at a BLU Medic who was petting a dove. Maybe not all of these people are as barbaric as I thought for them to be.

She then finished the spell that will teleport all of these people to where she wanted them to be at; a farm known to the locals as Sweet Apple Acres. Nightmare Moon then made more cloud coverage as to not let any of the mercenaries become suspicious as what was going on. Once that was done, she finally started to chant a thousand year old incantation to completely finish the spell.

(…......)

Sniper took a shot from his brand-new sniper rifle. He loved it, from the texture of the butt, to the feel of the recoil. It was made as though it was crafted from himself to his standards. Even his Fortified Compound didn’t give out the same luxury. He quickly reloaded it in record time, faster than usual, and gave out another shot, hitting the RED Soldier right in the pelvis. That’s going to hurt, but I’m getting reckless. Need to be up higher. Sniper then finished the job by hitting the Soldier in the middle of the forehead, which in the end caused him to erupt into flames. Got the bugger, but not quite what I was expecting.

Sniper then shot a couple more rounds into the throng of mercenaries crowding around the center shed. He then coincidentally looked up to the sky to see a dark-blue horse with a horn and… wings?

Sniper then tried to yell out to the crowd of people, but suddenly, there was a white flash and the ground suddenly turned green. He looked around, the central shed was still there, but it was more, well, colorful. Then he turned his eyes to the house on the opposite side, once again, more colorful. It was like looking through Pyrovision but without the goggles. The Australian was stunned by this sudden change in scenery, it was beautiful. But his attention then turned back into the battle and started to release rounds once again.

(….)

Later, the RED had once again captured and kept the central point. Being disappointed once again by their failure, BLU team slowly marched back towards their spawn points, being absolutely oblivious to the huge change in scenery. The only people noticing were Sniper and obviously the Pyro.

Although she never took off the mask, Pyro noticed the change in the oxygen around her and how she felt grass again after the boring, lifeless sands of New Mexico. She started to wander away from the crowd and was not noticed until the Medic said, “Look! Does anyone have any idea where the Pyro is going?”

Everyone shrugged their shoulders and started to step on the pads to get home, but they were interrupted by the Engineer. “Guys, stop! The pads do not work! Trust me, I’ve tried, but it only leads me back here.”

Both teams groaned in agony at the thought of walking towards a bus stop, but finally realized that they are no longer in Harvest.
Soldier had dropped a cigar he was chewing on and then said, “Men, get your money ready cause we’re headin’ into town. No if’s, and’s, or but’s. We’re goin’.”

So then the teams decided why not, and then walked behind Soldier who was leading the group.

As they reached the outskirts of town, a dark blue smoke appeared. The teams grew curious and then started to grow a terrified as the smoke materialized into a dark-blue alicorn. First thing Soldier did when he saw this was to put both hands over his groin in an attempt to protect them by any means necessary. The alicorn blushed and then opened her wings wide just so it can look bigger than it should. It then spoke in a feminine voice, “Welcome, to the world of Equestria!” She cackled. “Thine name Nightmare Moon and ye shall address me as so. Now, who is the RED team?” A row of hands rose up almost immediately. “Good,” She grinned, causing her fangs to show, making the Soldier put his helmet over his groin. She continued, “Because you’re my Company. Now, from- “

“Nightmare Moon! Come face us, the Elements of Harmony that is!”

Nightmare Moon was interrupted by the said group. As she turned around, not only that she saw the six Elements, but she also saw her sister along with; Princess Celestia.

“Ah, so good to see thy sister, how art thine grey hairs?”

“I will not fall for your antics, and you also leave me with no other choice but to use the Elements on you.”

“Ah, but sister, I have a small mercenary army waiting at my disposal.” Nightmare Moon beckoned towards the RED team, who seemed to be ready to get back into battle any time soon.

Princess Celestia swallowed a lump in her throat, but then she noticed the small number and then relaxed a little. “They are no match for my Royal Guards.”

“Ah, but’s where the fun begins, you also get a small mercenary army. BLU team, please walk towards your new company leader, Princess Cuntlestia.” The BLU team reluctantly walked towards the white alicorn, and then stood while their new boss was angered by the insult.

“I don’t tolerate such names that describe one ’s self.” A silence lingered between the two goddesses after the comeback.
..
..
..
Until Scout had to say something. “Looks like someone needs some aloe vera cuz’ someone just got burned!”

Suddenly, the two human teams erupted into laughter, but it quickly died away as they looked at their new bosses. Nightmare Moon couldn’t help but giggle a bit, but Princess Celestia was completely serious on the subject.

Meanwhile, the Elements were trying so hard on not to say anything to cause a war between the two, but they knew it couldn’t be avoidable.

“So, I got dibs on the thing that spoke,” Rainbow Dash whispered to Pinkie Pie. “What about you?”

“I got the thing with the mask, he looks interesting,” the pink mare replied.

“Are you sure it’s a stallion?”

“No idea…” Pinkie trailed off.

“You think it’s a better idea if all of us talked to the BLU team since they’re on our side?” The sky coloured pegasus said.

“Maybe, but I’m getting a Pinkie Sense about the masked thingamabob.”

“What does it say?”

“It’s not going to be quite what I expected. Is it a surprise? I sure do love surprises! They’re so much fun! I really hope it’s a birthday present, oh wait, that’s in two months! Silly me, I should remember dates more often. Oooh! That means I can plan my birthday party to be even better! And then….”

Rainbow Dash stopped listening to Pinkie, and started to take a look at the ‘Thing That Spoke’. That’s what I’m calling it for now. Close enough right?

Scout got the feeling he was being watched, so his instinct told him to look around, and found his eyes to meet up the sky-coloured mare. But then, he noticed the rainbow-colored mane. Look away, NOW! Scout then turned around to have a chat with the Pyro –if he can –just so he gets his mind of that pony.

Dash thought he had seen her, but she also noticed the look of sudden surprise on his face. Am I that stunning? Did I maybe come on too strong? She sighed; At least I’ll get to talk to him later.

“Okay! It’s a deal then!” Nightmare Moon suddenly said, causing everybody/pony to jump. “We have come up with a conclusion, in an act to find out who will get the land fairly, we have declared a war within each other!” The ponies gasped at declaration, including the now appearing audience that just happened to be late to the party, so to speak.

“Now don’t worry, we are not going to actually use any ponies for this war, we are going to only use our teams!” She beckoned towards the RED team –who happened to be playing cards –and the BLU team –who happened to be sleeping or talking with each other about the locals.

“I’m sorry my fellow subjects, but this was the only way that I can get rid of Nightmare Moon without harming you. So please, bear with me.” Princess Celestia announced. She lowered her voice to a casual speaking level and then turned towards the Elements. “Now, in the agreement, I’ve said I’m going to use our newfound teams, but the compromise I had to do, was that you all were to be a part of the BLU team, which is us. Nightmare Moon said she was going to use changelings, so you might need to be careful when in the matches.”

The six sat there, surprised at this new knowledge.

I have to fight along with these guys? Sweet! Then I might get the chance to talk with ‘Thing That Spoke’! It’s going to be so AWESOME! Dash thought.

Scout then noticed the ‘Rainbow Pony’. That’s what I’m calling it, pretty descriptive don’t you think so mind? I’m so awesome, I wonder if I can make it echo. Echo… (Echo….)I am Sinister…. (I am Sinister…) Saxton HAALLE….. (Saxton HAALLE…..) I love my ball…. (I love my ball….)

Anyways, in other news, Scout noticed the “Rainbow Pony’s” excitement and he ‘thought’ it could only mean one thing, that HE had to be with THEM. I’m pretty sure everyone else feels the same except for the Pyro. I’m still wondering what underneath that flame-retardant suit.

Pyro tried not to look at Scout, mainly because for one he was looking at her, and two, she is actually going to work with some ponies! Yay! Gotta mark this off the bucket list underneath making a bonfire out of cars, or was it trees? I’m not too sure.

For everyone else on the team, they were completely oblivious to the assault on what was going to happen to them. Of course they were made to expect the unexpected, but here, there was nothing to expect. Especially with a jumping pink pony that’s ready to explode with excitement.

Welcome to My House Party!

Her Pinkie Senses told her about his. The moment of all things, the time that she had put her name-sake at test, the time she puts all her talents all on the line. Either she puts all on the line, or she’s going to fall down hard. She said the only thing was the most reasonable, most expected, wanted thing that she had thought of.

“This calls for a party!” Pinkie yelled after the jumping furiously for about ten seconds. “And everypony in Ponyville is invited!” The pink mare then smiled the biggest she can.

“The problem is Pinkie,” Twilight started. “There isn’t enough room to fit everyone inside Sugarcube Corner. You do know that right?”

“Of course I do silly!” Pinkie was almost literally glowing by now, making Celestia a bit jealous. “That’s why I took the trouble of decorating the park just for this exact situation!”

“Um, Pinkie, how did you do this while everypony was here? Surely somepony must have seen you gone.”

Pinkie replied by putting her hoof at Twilight’s mouth, and then booped her nose. “I did it beforehand, my Pinkie Senses told me.”

The lavender unicorn rolled her eyes.

“Alright everypony,” Pinkie yelled through a megaphone, which to pop from somewhere. “Now follow me to the party!”

Every human looked at each other, then back to the pony, and finally shrugged, deciding that they had nothing else to do in this newfound world.

Once everybody/pony got to the site of where the pink pony was talking about, a white unicorn with blue, shaggy hair walked up to a stand that was surrounded by speakers and subwoofers. “Kick it Vinyl!” Pinkie yelled.

Vinyl had started to flip the record to her best songs, until she noticed the crowd of humans that walked along the throng of ponies. Maybe I shouldn’t play this song, maybe something that everypony should like. Vinyl thought twice about this, but she knew that it was probably best for her and everypony else.

She inserted a song that was given to her by Lyra, who said that this musical artist was one that apparently ponies in the ‘human’ world love to listen to. So if the ponies love it, then these ‘things’ must love it to, right? My logic is the best of anypony’s! Hay, I might be a genius! It’s time to get start this party of ours then, starting with this song. The unicorn popped in a vinyl record of what appears to have a red letters in graffiti-style writing. Vinyl then started to spin the turntable and out of the speakers, came a song that most of the humans know as one the most very disco songs that ever existed in their world.

(….)

Soldier started to dance, he didn’t care what the others thought, whatever he did, and that was his own business. No matter how many other people hated this song, he still loved it.

Scout thought he had gone insane, he’s pretty sure everyone else had as long as well. Even though Soldier looked like he’s having the time of his life. He took a look at the ponies; they seem to be enjoying this song fairly well. He took a long breath, looked around, and decided to raid the drinks and snack bar. He hasn’t had anything to eat since lunch hour, which contained an apple, sandwiches, a can of Bonk! (Who knew they actually produced these for just average human consumption?), and something made by his mother. Not sure what it was though, it was made up of something black, crunchy, and bitter.

Scout took a long look what was on the stand; there were chips with some dip, fruit punch, apple cider, muffins, cupcakes, and some cheese pizza. He grabbed a plate of chips and some punch. He started to get annoyed by the song, he didn’t usually listen to this song, but he didn’t hate it; just disliked it. The best introduction into a different place is getting Rick Roll’ed.

The young man sighed, it could’ve been worse. Then he took a look at Pyro, who happened to play with the smaller ponies. I didn’t know the Pyro liked kids. Well, assuming the smaller ones are kids. Scout shrugged it off. But then he almost dropped his plate after noticing what the Pyro did next. No. Freaking. Way. His jaw dropped in a comical sense and while he stood there gaped, Scout wished he didn’t witness it; it had changed his life for better or for worse.

(……)

Pyro watched the fillies gather around her, wondering what was under the suit. After a while of the fillies asking questions, she pulled out her flamethrower. When she pulled it out, a small white colt with brown spots started to play with the nozzle of the weapon, after a moment of him playing with it, Pyro lifted up the flamethrower into the air and then used the air blaster to shoot him up into the air. The fillies gasped, but then sighed in relief when Pyro caught the colt with her hands. She beckoned for the next foal to come up, but they were eager and had rushed so much, Pyro used the blast to protect herself from the overwhelming crowd. But it was useless against the giggles of the youngsters. They wanted more, but she didn’t allow it because she started to reach towards her back.

When she reached the zipper, she pulled it down and then started to remove the suit. She had clothes on, but it was an undershirt and long orange pants. She was skinny, but not scrawny, and then she tied up her long, brown hair into a ponytail. Finally after a few moments of silence, Pyro spoke in a serene voice. “Now, where’s the food? I’m starving my life out, almost literally.”

(… … )

Soldier kept dancing; it looked like he no longer gave a care about anything. Until he turned to see what everyone was looking at; if love at first sight was true, then it didn’t exist in his world –until now. She was stunning in his eyes, but he knew that this too good to be true. He tried to find out where she came from, until he saw the lifeless pyro suit. Impossible! I would’ve known if he was actually a female! Let’s see if I can’t get my charms working. The American grinned, no woman never failed to fall for him. He started to walk, but with a little bit of swagger, as to make him look a bit more ‘hip’.

When he approached the snack bar where Pyro was standing, he leaned over and then spoke. “Hey, so you must be Pyro. Listen —“

“Look,” She interrupted. “I know you’re trying to hit on me, but I’m going to keep this simple and just say no.“

Soldier’s smile quivered. “Did I just hear you right? You said no?”

“Did I stutter?”

“Well, n-no.” He couldn’t believe what he was hearing! Nobody ever rejects Soldier, nobody.

“Good, then that means leave me be. I’m starving and I’d rather not be mad at the moment.” Pyro left with a cup of punch, leaving the disappointed American standing there.

While Scout was watching this, he took note that maybe he should make a more careful approach, a lot more careful than the reckless Soldier. As long he didn’t get Pyro mad at him, he was in the clear right?

Suddenly, he was attacked by a random pony from the behind, which latched on his back and then whispered in his ear, “Hey, did ya’ miss me?”

Scout’s eyes widened when he heard this. Please, don’t tell me it is ‘Rainbow Pony’. Cuz’ if it is, kill me now. I beg of you! He grabbed the pony and held it in front of him.

“Hey there, my name’s Rainbow Dash, what’s yours?”

Scout nearly dropped the sky coloured pegasus, but he kept his cool and spoke, “My name’s Scout and,” Say something smart, maybe she’s not into smart people. “I love my ball.”

“You love your ball?” Rainbow Dash snickered. “Then where is it? Also, it would be great help if you put me down, it’s not every day that I get picked by a creature that looks like you.”

Scout placed the pegasus on the ground. Now would be the worst time that I have a breakdown, especially in front of all of these people! Got to escape quickly!

“Listen, maybe we can talk about this later,” he said. “You seem pretty fun and all, but I’m just not in a talking mood.”

“Maybe you’re done talking to Rainbow Dash, but not me.” Scout turned to where the voice had come from, and standing there was another pegasus that was a grey-ish blue with an off white mane. “The name is Cloud Kicker, and maybe instead of her to talk to,” She glared at Dash. “You should have a talk with me; we could talk more than just friends here.” She winked.

“No! I’m sick and tired of you coming and stealing the shots!” the sky blue pegasus snapped. “At least let me have it once in a while!”

“No, it’s not my fault I can’t control myself! Maybe you should take him before I do next time!”

“Fine I will!” Dash growled. “But this one’s mine! What do you think?”

Dash turned to where Scout is standing, well, was standing. “Look what you did Cloud Kicker! You scared him away!”

“Once again, it’s not my fault!”

The two mares kept arguing while Scout made it back to the tables, away from the mass of ponies that seems to get on his crazy side. He took a look around the wooden, round tables. There was Demoman laughing and drinking like the usual, but with a purple pony with a darker purple mane. They had two tipped over barrels with a couple of empty bottles of vodka, tequila, and whiskey. But what seemed to stand out was that the label on the bottles said, ‘Applejack Daniels’ instead of just Jack.

Scout then turn to the opposite site of the crowd of tables to see Heavy munching down his trademark sanviches. But once again, he was with a mint-coloured pony that had a two toned mane of white and the coat color. They were having an eating contest on who can eat the most sanviches.

But as Scout looked around more, he noticed everyone was enjoying themselves, even soldier, who was still bummed about being rejected. So why was Scout so lonely in this situation? Was it just the fact that his one fear had just hit on him? Or was it that two girls were fighting over him. Oh wait, he’s supposed to feel happy about that, but Scout just seemed to mope around. You know, I’m just going to go to the dance floor and not give a single frak about what’s happening! He thought.

As the runner stood up, his boss appeared on the stage and then all the ponies stopped and bowed. So, is this person an emperor or something? Scout pulled up a chair. Oh this is going to be good.

(……)

Princess Celestia thought for a second, she had to choose her words correctly, or this would end up being total mayhem. Although this is the first time she ever done this kind of a situation, Celestia was pretty sure she can handle this. What’s got to lose? It’s a win-win situation! Besides, she is the boss. Oh this power feels great! Why have I never felt this way before? No! Stop! Don’t let this get to your head. It would only end for the worse. I better not keep them waiting on me.

“Good afternoon my little ponies,” Good starting line, should say that more often. Oh if only Twilight had good speaking skills, then I would have her doing this instead of me. Celestia continued, “As you may know, we have a newfound group of creatures with us today. The species are called ‘humans’, but please be polite and call them at which they wished to be called.”

The white alicorn looked at the group of humans. “Now, I know that your old contracts said that you had to keep your name under secrecy, but under mine, you may use your personal and official names; rather than names that described your occupations.” She noticed that the humans looked a bit confused under such circumstances, but they shrugged it off and kept a mental note about it
.
“Also,” She continued. “You may know that Nightmare Moon also has a team that looks very similar to our team. But do not worry about it; they are to be placed in Cloudsdale. You may wonder how they are able to live on the cloud, but they were handed a spell in which they know how to use and can walk on clouds as long they are living.”

“The final announcement is that of which concerns me the most,” Do, not, buck this up! The whole town of Ponyville rests on your shoulders. Please mother of me, let luck be in my hooves! Celestia’s smile quivered, but luckily nopony noticed, “The current human team shall be in need of living quarters.” Why am I so worried about this? This should just be a snap! “So that’s why I’m proposing that the humans shall live with the residences on this list.”

The alicorn levitated a small scroll in front of her, and then started to call out names. But before she did, the human with a helmet stood up. “Where is our living quarters Ma’am?”

“You are to live with Elements of Harmony for the time being.” Buck! Why did I have to blurt that out? I’m losing my touch.

“No way, are you serious?” Twilight gasped. “Are you sure? Because we don’t know what they eat!”

“I do!” Said the mint coloured pony that was eating with Heavy.

“Pray tell, what do they eat?” Twilight replied.

“They are omnivores! They eat both veggies and meat!” A yellow pegasus gasped at the mention of meat.

“Wait a second!” The human with bandages on his hands spoke. “What about being clean? I mean am I one of the only ones that actually brought a toothbrush? What about clothing and washing ourselves?"

A blue unicorn gasped. “Don’t tell me that you guys forget to brush your teeth!”

“Oh look at me, ahm Scout, and me mother packed me bags fo’ me,” Demoman said

“Shut up!” Scout yelled, and then said under his breath. “At least she cares.”

“Oh, ye talkin’ ‘bout me mother eh? Well, I’ll show you!” Demoman put up his fists.

“Boys stop! You’re just like little kids!” Pyro said. “Didn’t your mothers tell you how to behave?”

Well, this escalated fairly quickly, a lot faster than Discord’s rise. Celestia thought, and then spoke in the Royal Canterlot Voice.
She missed using it due to people getting scared, but it she might just have to use it here. “Stop your bickering, NOW!”

Suddenly, every being turned and then looked at the alicorn, the ponies then shrank away a bit in fear that might as well have been sent to the dungeon for a few years. The humans were a bit shocked, but then were embarrassed that they acted like fools. It was like a mother finding their children inside the cookie jar before bed.

“Now, before I continue this announcement, I must ask The Element of Generosity for assistance of clothing,” Celestia looked in her direction. “Is it possible that you can do such tasks they ask of?”

The white unicorn pondered over her options. “Of course I may; besides, business is a bit low recently. Not to mention I need to figure out their uniform sizes.”

“Whoa, who said anything about uniforms?” Scout said.

“What is your name human?” Celestia asked.

“The name’s Scout.”

“No, the name that your parents given you.”

“It’s Richard. Why do you ask?”

“Well Richard, if you need to look different than the other team, you’re going to need a uniform that makes you my team, got it?” Celestia looked fiercely at him.

“Alright,” Scout sat back down, for the sake of making the alicorn less mad.

“Now, does anyone else have a comment that should be said, hmm?” She looked around the crowd of people. “I apologize that it had to come to this, but please calm down for the sake of me finishing this.”

The alicorn cleared her throat before continuing. “Now, who is the town’s dentist?”

“I am!” the blue unicorn with a mane that looks like a popular toothpaste brand.

“Are you able to provide these people with the oral treatment that they need? Oh, and while you’re at it, can you tell me what your name is?”

“My name is Colgate your majesty, and yes I am able to provide the treatment, but I cannot allow it to be free though.” She replied.

“No need to worry, I will pay you for the trouble, you just worry about getting the job done.” Celestia finished. Finally, at least someponies are willing to cooperate. “Now, I heard that a spa is here, may I talk to the managers?”

“Right here your highness.” A pair of mare of similar colors appeared, one was pink with blue hair, while the other is, well, vice versa.

“Are you willing to provide the treatment of handing out cleansing supplies, as in shampoo and soap? No need to worry about money, I’ll handle it.”

“Well, my name is Lotus,” Said the blue pony with a pink mane. “And when you put it that way, I’m pretty sure we can handle it. Is that right Aloe?”

“Yes we can,” Aloe responded. “Possibly a special treatment if they wanted it.”

“Now that we got that covered,” Celestia said. “We just need somepony in case of medical emergency. Now, Nurse Redheart, do you—“

The tall slender human with specs stood up. “My name is Arvin, and before you go any further, I will be one that will provide medical support. I do so on and off the field.” He snickered. “Even though I’ve gotten my medical degree four times removed, I’m still able to do so. Besides, it would make more sense if a human doctor healed another human.”

“Is that so?” Redheart replied. “Then, how would you help somebody whose blood is literally pouring out of their veins, they would need medical emergency, but I don’t see you prepared for such.”

“That’s terribly too easy,” He said. “You obviously know that, the answer would be to use my new medical technology that’s highly advanced, even by your standards.”

“You’re bluffing.”

“No I’m not,” Medic then pulled out his medic-gun. “This thing right here can heal any wounds.” He got closer to the nurse’s ear. “But it can’t heal ribs unfortunately.”

“So, show me,” Redheart turned to Spy. “Now, take that knife, and then stab yourself in the stomach.”

Spy looked at her in way that she might be mad. He sighed, “If you wish.” As he lifted his butterfly knife, Arvin turned on the medic-pack on his back, signaling Spy that he would be safe from harm, no matter what he would do. Spy let knife plunge deep into his skin, So that what it feels like to get stabbed. It hurts, badly.

He let go of the knife and then fell towards the ground, barely breathing. Medic then removed the knife from the injury, lifted him against a chair, and flipped the switch on the medic-gun.

As this was all happening, Nurse Redheart was shocked that Spy actually did what she had intended. But she wasn’t alone in this shock, all the other ponies where too. Well, except the humans, they knew what their fellow team member could do.
Celestia knew she had let it gone too far, but she really wanted to know what Richtofen was capable of.

Medic then raised Spy’s shirt, muttering an apology at the fact that they had to see the healing process, and then let the gun do its job. As the trails of red plasma reached Spy, the wound started to close up. Skin reaching skin; blood becoming nothing but water as they go back inside the body; muscle fibers becoming intertwined once again like a stitch in clothing; and colour again reaching Spy’s face again, it was like watching how things are made, or how paper is created.

The doctor then turned off the gun and the pack, then spoke after a long silence. “You can get up now Spy, now’s not the time to be sleeping, we got an audience. Besides, I don’t think you need to pretend anymore.”

“It’s called acting,” Suddenly, all the ponies gasped at this mystical ‘magic’ that this human had. Spy continued, “Now if you’ll excuse moi, I’ve got to go and get something to eat, I’m hungry.”

He walked away from the awestruck group of ponies. Even Celestia knew that she doesn’t have the magic to do what Arvin had done. Healed somepony from what seemed to be basically a near-death experience? Even I cannot do so, although I am nearly there.

“So, this means that the healing capabilities are done. Now Arvin,” She looked at the doctor, who seems to be drinking out of the gun with a straw. I’m not sure if that’s healthy or just plain stupid. It’s like watching a filly trying to drink from a sixty-four ounce cup at the movies. She giggled. It’s cute watching him look so innocent like that. Wait, what am I thinking? I don’t have a crush him, do I? No! Stop, don’t too attached, they are my employees, and not close friends.

The sun goddess continued, “Now, will you be able to show how you created this technology and possibly heal the needed until we are able to create such a thing?”

“I have one problem with that statement ma’am.” Medic replied

“Which is?”

“I do not hand out my ideas for free; besides, it’s too highly advanced and could possibly cause many problems money-wise. It charged me about one hundred billion, two hundred thousand dollars just to create the backpack for this.” Medic pointed towards the pack. “But, most of the items for this were company issued; meaning some of it was not created by me. Like the gun for example.”

Disappointed, Celestia decided that maybe this was just out of league for the ponies, but one day, she hoped, that they would be able to have more than just the Rainbow Factory. Unfortunately, the Factory had to be placed under a heavier control due to ‘mysterious disappearances’ around it, and ‘unsanitary’ conditions. Never again will she ever let that happen again.

Demoman stood up, and after a few minutes of wobbling side-to-side, he said, “ye kno’ what me thinks ‘bout this?”

“What is it?” the alicorn asked. “I hope it can bring good will for all to use.”

“No, not that mate,” Demo then walked next to Celestia, almost fell a couple of times in the process. The Scottish man then lifted his right leg, and then did what nopony should ever do to anypony else, especially the sun goddess.

He farted the biggest that he ever done. So loud, that he might need to change his pants later on. It lasted for about three minutes long, non-stop. Demoman don’t care, he was drunk and happy, if he was to die, then this would’ve been the best memory to date.

Everypony stood there shocked, even the victim of the attack just stood there, trying to fully understand what had just happened. Then she finally came out the trance when she took a whiff of what happened to be the worst smell her nose could muster. It was enough to knock out a full-grown dragon, minotaur, twenty ponies, three griffons, and a hydra. All at once and still have enough room to fit a baby dragon. But Celestia knew better, Luna was basically a goddess in pranking, she could conjure up a stink bomb so badly, that it was about three-fourths of the strength in this one. So Celestia did the best an alicorn could and just held her breath as long as she can. The goddess could usually last for about an hour, but she had been out of practice for so long, she could only last for about fifteen minutes, not long enough to have the smell gone.

Meanwhile, the smell spread and it reached all ends of Ponyville, from the library, to the farm, and to the Everfree forest; in less than five minutes. The humans did nothing but just sat there, fortunately, they grew used to the smell of Demoman’s farts. But unfortunately, that meant nearly every day of it, virtually everywhere! It was worse in the bathroom! To this day, the teams are still wondering how they are still alive.

The ponies nearby suddenly had gasmasks on, it’s like they had come prepared. But sadly, they still smell it pass the filters, but just not as strong and it was endurable. Celestia was almost out of breath, until the weather team decided to use the wind to blow the stink away, preferably towards Canterlot on accident.

Once the air was no longer contaminated, Celestia exhaled and took a deep breath. Good, at least I survived it. “Now, once that was gone, can we at least continue with the assigning of living quarters? I want to get this done before I have to raise the sun tomorrow. It’s already midnight.”

“So, let’s get started then,” she looked to see in any of her guards were around, but the stink was so bad and unexpected, that it had knocked them out. Looks like I need to sleep somewhere here later on. “So, as I propose here, with Twilight Sparkle in her house, would be Soldier and Sniper. With Rarity would be Spy. With Applejack, would be Engineer and Heavy. With Pinkie, would be Pyro. With Fluttershy, would be Arvin,” Celestia paused, there had been a scratch off of where Fluttershy would be for Demoman, but in its place was Berry Punch. She shrugged, how Demoman acted while drunk, she hoped that this person was up for what was coming. The alicorn continued, “Demoman with Berry Punch. Finally, with Rainbow Dash, would be Richard.”

(……)

He couldn’t hear what she said, so he stood up and spoke, “I’m sorry, but did you just mention Rainbow Dash with me?”

“Yes I did,” Celestia replied. “Is that a problem? I could place you with Derpy or Cloud Kicker.”

Rainbow Dash was first to reply, “No problem ma’am! I’m pretty sure he’ll be okay with me.”

Of course I’ll be okay, when I’m on the ground crying my eyes out. Scout mentally replied.

“Good, because I’m not sure if these options failed that I had to send him to be with Discord. But then again, it does sound like a decent decision.” The goddess replied, but then after seeing the expressions on their faces she said, “Gotcha!”

What they didn’t know was that she ulterior motives in which they were assigned. She knew that Applejack and Engineer would become good friends due to accent. Fluttershy would be perfect friends with Arvin, reason being is because she’s going to be the medic of the team. So why not have two similar people learn of each other’s trick of the trade? Nightmare Moon already told her about the profiles of the team members, so she took that into consideration for this. She also told by her treacherous sister that there was a tenth person along, but she didn’t see the human. So was she telling her lie? Or was she trying to tell her that it’s in plain sight?

Celestia once again took a look at the group of humans; they seem to be playing cards, Rummy by the layout. Then she saw a dog, it looked like an average dog, but it had brown fur and black spots; like that of a Germane Shepard. Could this be the tenth person? If it was, then who did it belong to? If not, then why does it have a uniform similar to the rest? These questions filled the alicorn mind, but then she lost all care when she just thought that it happened to be just a mascot for the team.

(…)

Scout was worried, he knew that he had to get some sleep, but with the pony that absolutely almost makes him drop bricks whenever he took a look at her. He might as well try and get over the fear, would be no good if he suddenly broke down whenever he saw her, especially if it was in the middle of battle.

“Hey Scout, can I talk to you for a second?” He turned to see who the voice belonged to and found Pyro standing behind him.

“Yea, what’s up?” He replied.

“I know about your fear,” Pyro started. “It must be torture for you to live with her, is it not?”

“Of course it is, but I might as well deal with it, it’s either her or getting raped by Cloud Kicker.”

“You mean the one that tried to hit on you after Dash?” Pyro asked.

“Exactly,” Scout thought about Pyro’s situation. “So what do you think about the cotton candy one? She seems like a copy of you, except in pony form.”

“Oh you mean Pinkie Pie?” She said. “Yea, I’m pretty sure it’s going to be fun. It’s isn’t every day that you see a talking pony, except with Pyrovision.”

“Yea, I’ve been meaning to ask you, how does that thing work?” Scout asked.

“It basically gives me the feeling that I’m just having fun, once in a while I can see past the vision and all I see is fire instead of bubbles. It makes me happy that I know I’m having fun, but it is worse when you find out you’re the one causing the pain for the others. It sometimes scares me and leaves scars, but you can’t fight what you have to do. I can’t talk to anybody, well, mainly because of the obvious. I can’t talk past the filters, but the Pyrovision makes me feel better; knowing that the worse is better kept behind the curtain.”

After a moment of silence, the younger one spoke, “That was deep.”

“Of course that was. What do you think I do whenever I just sit and shoot flames?”

“You laugh,” Scout said sheepishly.

“Now that’s like more than half the time.” Pyro replied, having them two laugh it out. Pyro wanted to know her team more, but maybe one at a time. Soldier is most likely one of those people she wouldn’t talk to for a while, for how he treated her. Afterwards, they started talking like old friends who found each other after twenty years.

About an hour later, Scout thought to himself once everybody/pony left the park to head home, Looks like I need to face my fears
and deal with it. Now, where does this pony live? He saw the rainbow pegasus and then yelled her name.

A few seconds later, she came up to him, “Yea, what seems to be the problem?”

“I’m about to pass out. Can you tell me where I’ll be sleeping?”

“Well, that’s the problem; I need to know the spell for you to walk on clouds.”

Why do I need to walk on clouds? It’s not like I’m going to be flying, am I?

“If you looked up,” Dash said. “You see that my house is a cloud.”

Scout did as he was told and saw that the house a tiny bit high. “Huh, so how do I get up there?”

“I’ll carry you; you look light enough for me.”

“Here you go Dashie,” a lavender unicorn appeared. What was her name? It was Twilight; at least I think it is. Oh well, might as well try.

“You’re Twilight, aren’t you?” Scout asked.

“Yes I am, and you must be Richard. Pleased to meet you,” The unicorn replied. “Now, I’m going to use a spell in which—“

“I don’t need you to use it, just teach me.”

“How are you going to do that? You don’t have a unicorn horn.”

“Of course I don’t that’s why I brought my copy of Casters Quaterly with me.”

In less than ten minutes later, Scout found himself at the porch of the sky house. Once he was let in, he fell on the couch and didn’t wake up for the next eighteen hours.

Author's Note

Originally, Medic's name was supposed to be Richtofen, then I remembered CoD and decided not to.
Also, can you guess who Pyro was based off? Kudos to the pony who can get the person, and the original reference.
Finally, I lied about having a few chapters like this.
All chapters from now on will be at least 3,500 words.

Up Next!
Will Scout become friends with his fear?
Will Cloud Kicker ever get some?
Will Celestia ever confess that she has a crush on Arvin?
"It's not a crush!"
Right, tell that to the guy that's looking at me.
"That's a mirror."
Of course it is. *Gets thrown against the wall by Celestia's rage*

Shoot First and Talk Later Pt 1

A stack of papers fell unto a large round table, it had scattered across to the other side. Some pages had photographs paper-clipped to the page, while others had profiles assigned to them. A blue aura surrounded one of the pages of the former; a white stallion looked at it with intense care and then gasped at the sudden recognition of the one in the picture.

“I thought we had gotten rid of her and her army!” The stallion said.

“Well,” a white alicorn replied. “It seems like she still has some of the army with her, but whatever Nightmare Moon is doing, it dealing with this mare.”

“But why would she have dealings with Chrysalis, Princess?”

Celestia sighed, “She said that she would use changelings in her team, as to replace the lack of ponies on both sides. She thought that it would be inexpensive and the risk of losing innocent ponies would be cut down to zero.”

“So what is Nightmare Moon planning to do next?” The white stallion fiddled with his hooves to hide his growing anxiety.

“It would be to take over local cities around Cloudsdale,” the alicorn turned around to the map behind her. Cloudsdale was virtually forever moving, but around this time in the season, it’s around Los Pegasus.

“I assume she would take over Canterlot?”

“No Shining Armor, it would have to be Los Pegasus,” Celestia turned around to look at the Captain of the Royal Guard. “So now’s the time to be the offensive force and claim the city as ours before Nightmare Moon does. So what I want you do, is to go and evacuate the city so we can make sure that it can be safe to claim.”

Shining Armor started to jot down the instructions, he was sure that he might forget a couple of instructions. He stopped, Okay, maybe a few. He looked back up to the princess who looked like she might need a decent sleep, not like she’s sick or anything. I wonder if she can read minds. If she can, then I might to stop thinking about how bad she looks.

Celestia looked at Shining Armor in annoyance. She was unaware about what Shining was thinking of, but she was aware of how he looked at her. “Need something before you go?”

“Not really, but I might need to ask about how well you are.”

“I’m really exhausted, but without another to take care of raising the moon, it gets really stressful,” She rubbed her temples to get herself settled. Maybe I should get a cup of tea, it usually helps. The sun goddess continued with her instructions, “Once you are sure that everypony is evacuated and placed at least two miles away from the city, I will place my team on the Southside of the city. If anything was to happen during the evacuation, send me a letter via magic and then we could set up elsewhere.”

Shining Armor struggled to write it down, mainly because he was sketching a picture of Cadence being a changeling, as what reason why he was drawing her like that was simple enough; he was bored.

“Oh Shining, don’t worry about your wife and child, they will be in good hooves,” The stallion looked up to the alicorn. How in the hay did she know about my child! There was no way she could’ve known! I’ve kept it a secret for the longest time! Shining saw a newspaper in the trash had the headlines ‘The Child of The Crystal Empire!’ Oh, well, that explains a ton. He remembered the first day that he found out that he had a child. Boy, was Cadence ticked.

It started back when the changeling invasion happened, well, before the day of the marriage. Shining decided to have a little fun and then it escalated from there. But what happened was that it was actually Chrysalis and while after the changelings got kicked out; there was a basket with a foal and a note. Shining tried to keep it a secret, but it had only lasted for about a minute before the new wife appeared. He still remembers the night as clear as somepony waving their hoof at him.

(…)

Two Years Ago

“What’s this?” Cadence asked. She was curious of the basket, it might be a late present, but it could also be just an accidental occurrence. But whatever it was, her husband couldn’t let her look into it.

“It’s just bread,” Shining tried to keep it away from her, but he had forgotten that she also had a horn as well. “No need to look into it, I’ll take care of it.”

“Are you trying to hide something from me?” She had done her trademark glare. Shining Armor called it ‘The Lie Detector’, as it does what the name implies. “Because if you are, I can find a way to worm it out of you whether you like it or not.”

“You wouldn’t,” He gasped.

“I would, and I will if you don’t hand the basket to me, or we’ll have to have a meeting with the torture chamber. I won’t stop until you almost laugh to death.”

He back away farther from her, she would never make that threat unless she’s serious, it was such a rare occurrence for her to go this far. Those tickling hooves of death would never stop.

As Shining tried to back away even further from Cadence, the basket cooed. Both ponies stopped dead in their tracks as they tried to make out what had just happened. The stallion looked to the basket, then back at Cadence, who was just picking up a note that fell to the ground. Shining Armor knew that he was a goner, and started to rush back upstairs to his super-secret hiding place; the closet.

Once he had reached the door to the room, he heard the unmistakable Royal Canterlot Voice.

“YOU HAVE FIVE SECONDS TO EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT THIS IS!”

The unicorn tried opening the door with his magic, but it was locked. Once Shining looked back at the stairs, his wife was standing right there at the last step with a look that’ll make any full-grown dragon cower in fear.

“I-I c-can explain,” Shining stuttered, raising his hooves in defense.

“Explain,” Cadence said bluntly.

Shining gulped; he knew that he wouldn’t get his favorite spot on the bed. But he knew that he would probably get his favorite couch to sleep at for the rest of the month, no matter the outcome of this situation.

(…..)

Present Time

The white unicorn shuddered, that night was one that he will never forget in his lifetime. The couch was comfy, but it was just small and cramped. Maybe he should get a bigger couch next time this happens, would be a great investment.

When the captain finished writing the orders down, he stood and started to carry out his duty —which was to head to Los Pegasus with a squad of the Royal Guards and evacuate as many as he can before the mercenaries appear.

Shining Armor was unsure about the team of mercenaries. Nine people having an all-out war against nine other people? That doesn’t sound much to him. He might want to stand-by just to watch what happens. Little did he know of how much of a battle it would really be if he happened to be close to it.

(……)

A loud snoring covered the house; it would be a shock to find out where —and whom— it had originated from.

But not to the victim of the snoring, he had found out in the first ten seconds. Ten seconds flat! That was a new record, but Scout could’ve handled it, it was worse when all of his siblings slept at mother’s house. But this! This was way worse; this was all from a small rainbow-coloured pony. And I thought this was a place filled with happiness and butterflies and whatnot.

Once the young fellow actually fallen asleep after an all-nighter, there was a ray of sunshine filing through the windows, telling him that this was just another day. If he had to put up with this every night, he might become an insomniac, or one Luna’s followers.

Either way, we would probably have to sleep during the day, when the monster-pony was gone. Might as well make a pot of really strong, caffeine-rich coffee to get me going, just for today.

He searched through his duffel bag, and finally finding the trademark red plastic container of Saxton Hale’s Power Coffee, ‘So Manly, you’ll grow biceps on your legs!’

Richard scoffed at the slogan, he knew it wasn’t true, but it was pumping to drink a good pot. His mother wouldn’t let him drink it, mainly because she said all coffee makes you shorter. That is somewhat true, but at least he wasn’t shorter than the Engineer.

After all the water changed into coffee, he grabbed a large cup from his duffel bag. He knew that he either had to drink it all, or suffer the consequences of the rainbow pony gaining unimaginable speeds that included nitrous.

But once Richard had returned to the coffee machine, he saw the said pony drinking from a small mug, looking at him with a smug.

“Nice try, although I give you points for trying to make it only for you,” Rainbow Dash shrugged then took a sip. Looking back at Scout she said, “This stuff is strong, what is it?”

“Well, if you took a look at the red container behind you, then you would know,” he replied, pointing to the large container.

After a few seconds of reading, she looked back at Richard, who had a small smile. “Alright, what did you put in this?”

“Nothing,” he grabbed the handle of the coffee pot and poured the rest into his cup. “How much caffeine can you have before you have a crash?”

“A crash? You mean like a sugar crash? I can stand for about an hour before it happens, why?”

Scout chuckled and swallowed a mouthful of the coffee. “Well, if you want to have a crash in about ten minutes, I would advise to stop. Reason why is because that has so much caffeine, that it’s basically made up of it.”

Dash looked at her cup, and then downed the rest of it. “Well, live with no regrets right? Or is it you only live —“

“Do not finish that phrase, I call bull on it,” Richard snapped. “I mean, look at me! I lived about five hundred times, mostly because of a spawn room.”

“Sheesh, a bit touchy aren’t we?” Dash muttered.

“It’s probably the coffee, and a night of no sleep,” But before Rainbow Dash could ask why, the watch on his wrist started to beep. “Looks like I’m being called down by Engie, you think you can give me a ride down to the ground?”

Dash put a hoof to her chin, “Let me think about that…”

“Really? Now’s not the time.”

“Fine, just trying to have a little fun,” Dash picked up Richard with her hooves, and started to lower him through the home’s floor.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa! Don’t you think what was a little extreme?” Richard said.

“Not really, once you get the hang of it, it’ll be easy!” Dash yelled.

Once they had landed on the ground in the market, Richard started to walk towards a random direction.

“Umm, Richard,” Dash said, pointing towards a road leading out of the town. “Applejack’s place is this way.”

He turned around, “I knew that.”

The day was still early, meaning that not many ponies were at the market yet, but there were a few sellers standing at their shops, waiting for the early ponies to buy something before the midmorning rush. Of course, Richard pulled out his small bag of bits, given to him by Celestia who said that he would have to spend it wisely.

It was only fifty bits, and there was just one thing that caught his eye.

A bat that looked very similar to his Sandman, but it was black with green flames on it. It also included a description tag;

Celestial Officious Changeling Killer

This weapon was crafted by Chrysalis herself to help punish the changelings that fail to follow her code. It was crafted with the power of Celestia and the pride of pegasi, as to make changelings have satisfaction whenever they take away love from others. The benefits of having this weapon will include; the ability of extreme cockiness, intense happiness, twenty percent more strength and awesomeness, and faster speed. But it comes with side effects; the ability of not wanting help from others, turns you into a changeling if intense usage, and the frequent cravings for chocolate, or wanting love from others.

Richard took a closer look at the side effects, but he just shrugged them off. Then he grabbed it and took a few swings — it felt natural. Then he spoke to the salespony, “How much for this bat?”

The brown stallion with an hourglass cutie mark replied, “That thing?” He scoffed. Then he realized that he might get something for this, “It’ll be forty bits.”

“Deal,” Richard slammed his bits on the stand and then started to walk away. Without realizing, he swung the bat, almost hitting a mint-coloured mare. “Sorry!”

“No worries, it’s not my fault I’m short,” She replied. “Name’s Lyra, what’s yours?”

Before Richard could reply, Rainbow Dash grabbed him by the shirt and started to drag him. “Remember that we have to get to Applejack’s, don’t want to be late.”

“Right, you go fly ahead and I’m going to run behind.”

“Well, a race it is then,” Dash crouched. “On your mark, set-go!”

She zoomed forward leaving a faint rainbow streak behind her. Richard pulled out his new bat and started to run.

After running past many ponies and houses, they reached a sign that had said, ‘Sweet Apple Acres’, and looking into the property, Richard saw endless rows of apple trees. I bet the farmers that live here are even apple-based. Maybe a complete apple family to go along with that! Or even better, apple-based meals! He got hungry after that last thought; he hasn’t eaten anything before he had left the cloud home, and was starting to regret that idea.

He started to walk along a dirt path that seemed to head towards a small country-style house, but before he actually got close enough to see the details, a hand was placed on his shoulder.

“Hey Engie,” Scout said without looking back. “You think we got enough time to eat something before we do this next mission?”

“Of course not,” the Texan replied. “You should’ve eaten before ya’ got here. Once everybody’s here, then we can git to work.”

Richard sighed; he knew that he would have to wait until lunch again, the time that he would — wait! He wasn’t at his home world anymore! So that means no lunch after all! He groaned, he would forever miss his favorite PB&J, and burnt whatever his mother cooked.

“Any idea if we would get lunch?” Scout asked.

“The Apple family here already covered that,” Engineer replied. “With their apples and some cider to go along with us,” He handed the young man a paper bag that had an apple print on it.

I stand corrected! Richard stared at the paper bag, and held onto it. Maybe I should be more careful on what I think of.

“We are bound to leave in ten, make sure ya got everything with you.” Engineer pulled out his mini-computer and started to construct a teleportation pad.

“Um Engie, are you sure you know where we’re going?”

“Of course!” He exclaimed, “Ah was given coordinates by our boss wanting us in a place called ‘Los Pegasus’.”

“Sounds like Los Vegas.” Richard said bluntly.

“Well, when ah researched about our new world, everything named has some kind of horse pun to it.” Engineer chuckled.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing really,” the Texan turned a bolt into place, causing the pad to start rotating. “It’s just silly that everything is related to horses one way or another. Now, this pad will lead us to a building at the south side of the city.”

Engineer looked at the entrance to the farm and saw the rest of the team walking in a group, with their assigned ponies, but only Demoman was holding his pony, on his shoulders and she hung limp. The purple pony was noticeably breathing, so she must be sleeping, or was just in a hangover.

Once everyone was standing next to Engineer, the rotating teleportation pad had finished warming up. This would mean that on the other side, the exit pad is finished and is ready to receive the oncoming task of doing its own job.

“Now,” Engineer started. “By the order of our boss, and y’alls princess, the ponies would have to stay here.”

The crowd groaned — to more specific, the ones who had to stay behind — and before they had to ask, Heavy interrupted what was probably on two other people’s minds.

“Do we get lunch?”

Scout facepalmed, and Engineer chuckled, “Like ah said about five minutes ago to Richard here, the Apple family here got it covered. Medic,”

The German looked up from his bag of Skittles ™, no-one asked how he had gotten them, but they wanted to bum some off of him. Instead, he just gave a whole bag to them. Once Arvin finished eating his handful of rainbow pellets, he gave the Texan with a look of acknowledgement.

“Ah want you to carry the lunch for us, and ah know that also works as a legitimate backpack as well, so don’t give me an excuse why you shouldn’t do so.”

Arvin shrugged and then picked up the sack lunches. He didn’t mind carrying the stuff, but maybe one of the other teammates should do it once in a while, maybe Heavy should, or the Pyro. He suddenly regretted the idea of both carrying it, even though Arvin knows what the Pyro looks like now, the fact that the paper bags and her together, don’t mix very well at all. Even worse, both of them would probably eat the lunches. Arvin decided to forget the situation and thought it was better to leave it with the professionals.

Once the Medic finished placing the bags in his backpack, Fluttershy nudged his leg, wanting another bag of Skittles. “You know Fluttershy, I’m going to stop giving you some for a while, and it’s not good for you.”

The butter pegasus looked at him with the most pleading eyes she can do, although she knew the fact that it would be bad for her, Fluttershy would never give up the delicious flavor of artificial fruits it carried. It was better than the candy Pinkie Pie gave her sometimes, but she would never admit it to her face. It would hurt Pinkie’s feelings and she was sure of it.

But Arvin knew better, “No, and that’s final. Not until I get back, then maybe you can have some.”

Fluttershy pouted, although the two became friends literally overnight, she felt like she was his daughter, which was weird to the ‘fatherly’ figure of the relationship. But Arvin had gone along with the flow, and decided that maybe Fluttershy needed to someone to guide her. At least, for now that is.

Scout took a step towards the pad, “Alright guys, you know the drill. The best person always goes first you know.”

As he placed both of his feet on the pad, it had started to whir faster and little beams of light started to gather around Richard. In a small, white flash of light, he was gone; meaning that the long-distance teleportation was successful. Engineer smiled, he knew that it was another job well done.

“Alright, who’s next?”

(……)

With the humans gone, the ponies stood there wondering where they went. After a minute or two of silence, Twilight was the first to break the glass.

“How did they do that!” she shouted.

“Wow, never thought that you were going to ask that,” Dash rolled her eyes.

“I know they don’t have magic, because Sniper explained it to me, and…” Twilight trailed off, but she decided that maybe she would ask the creator of this thing and find out more later. Then she asked what was on everypony else’s mind.

“Any idea on where they went?”

A pink pony appeared and mushed Twilight’s cheeks together. “They went to Los Pegasus silly!” She giggled.

“Oh,” Twilight replied, she would like to know how Pinkie knew, but she didn’t want to risk another headache.

Applejack’s stomach growled. “So, ya’ll want breakfast with the apple family?”

Every mare nodded their head, well, except for Berry Punch. Who was just waking up, and decided why not. She had nothing to do for the rest of the day anyways.

(…..)

A black hoof stepped on a pile of bits, which was kicked shortly after, scattering them towards a black shoe. A red gloved hand picked up a couple of them, and inserted them into a nearby slot machine. The ringing noise thereafter from the machine echoed throughout the empty building. As the machine finished the selection, it rang a sound that was none other than the jackpot prize.

“Whoa, dude! You just won a million bits,” RED Scout said.

Spy looked at the machine, then grabbed a small pouch from his left pocket and placed the bits inside. “Heh, then that means luck is just on our side today.”

A RED Heavy punched a slot machine, wanting some bits as well. Unfortunately nothing came out. A changeling about half of his size walked up to him and spoke in way that would describe how a snake talked, “These things work on magic, so that means unless you actually won something, nothing will come out.”

“Heavy does not care, just wanted to punch something.” He said. Heavy grabbed his Australium Tomislav and his Warrior's Spirirt and walked towards the rendezvous area where they were planned to meet with the ‘Queen’.

A changeling held up its left foreleg, signaling that they were to stop here.

There was a theory that every changeling spoke with the same kind of tongue and accent, but that wasn’t true. In fact, all changelings had a different way of talking, much like how average ponies talked, but instead, they all had one similar way of talking; they all talked in a voluptuous way. It was an adaptation to earn their love, but sometimes it just wasn’t necessary and kind of made them feel foolish.

So you can imagine what it sounded like when the changeling that lifted her foreleg sounded like when she said this, “Can you feel it? It feels like nothing I've ever felt before.”

The male section of the group coughed and shuffled their feet. The moment became really awkward, until there was a flash of green light.

There, standing in its place was the defeated queen of the invasion of Canterlot; Chrysalis. As she opened her eyes, she chuckled while flashing her viciously white fangs. Then the RED Soldier placed his helmet over his groin.

It looks like there will be no end to this attack.

Author's Note

Yea...

This ended up being a long one to type than I had expected to do!
But just to place it on the line, I had already thought up the chapter, but I ended up doing more, so this one will be a two part chapter.

NEXT!

Will Chrysalis play a big role in this?
Are Australium weapons better? Or are they just cooler?
Is it possible that humans can turn into changelings when using the C.O.C.K?
What happened last night with Demoman and Berry Punch?
Are these questions becoming annoying?

Find out next time!

Trigger Happy Ponies. Pt 2

Shining Armor stood in front of Team Sun-Butt — or that’s what he called them — briefing the team on the fact of they would have to secure the city as their own. As he had finished with the introduction of himself, a Royal Guard dashed into the room, out of breath.

“Sir,” he shouted as best as he can while panting. “We have Intel that there is makeshift base about one and a half kilometers away from here!”

The mercenaries stood up with their weapons, ready to take on the upcoming battle. They were anxious to get started. Because of the peacefulness of this world, it’s a bit hard to adjust to the soft life.

“Are you sure it’s a base?” the captain replied.

“Yes I am and we have sent a couple of pegasi to scout the area to make sure.”

Scout stood up with his Strange Winger ran out into the streets of Los Pegasus. However, before he could get very far, Shining Armor shot a spell to make him freeze for a minute.

“Now, where are you off to?” he asked.

Richard struggled to get free, but then gave out when he realized that he’s going nowhere. “I’m just going to give some guy a lesson.”

Pyro appeared without her mask on, so she can be able to speak clearly. “Maybe you should wait a few more minutes, and then you can go give Spy the best hit okay?”

Scout thought about it, then he gave the Pyro a thumb up, well, he tried to. Then the captain removed the spell placed on him, which gave Richard the ability to walk again.

“You know, being in that position makes you ache!” He rolled his head back and forth, getting the muscles back into shape. Then Richard pulled his leg behind him, and finished with touching his toes.

“So, when do we begin?”

Engineer walked out of the building where the meeting was held, then turned to the Shining Armor. “Is the city evacuated?”

The Captain turned to a nearby guard, who nodded his head. “Yes we are, just waiting a response from our pegasi to make sure this isn’t a joke. Then, maybe you can —“

A loud bang rang in the crisp, morning air, making everybody jerk their heads towards the origin of the sound. After a few moments of silence, a lone figure was flying towards them, with the red, rising sun behind. A minute passed with it slowly creeping towards the group. As it got closer, the mercenaries rose up their weapons, but lowered it when they had recognized it as a Royal Guard, but kept their fingers near the trigger just to be sure.

A guard rushed to its side as the guard slowly landed near the group. “We need a medic over here!” he yelled.

Arvin jogged out of the casino building where they had met up. Once he reached the pony, he noticed a few things different from the rest of the guards; one, he had a slightly blue tint to the whites of his eyes; two, although the guard was wounded, he would not have survived with these kind of injuries to the belly and neck, which were leaking blood at the time; three, he seemed slightly larger than the average guard.

But Arvin shrugged it off, and thought that maybe he had a higher rank than the others and probably had more luck than the others. But it still wouldn’t explain the eye color, which made the medic shudder about the volatile compounds that every special guard must go through.

As Medic switched his Quick-Fix on—he knew it would do as the name implies —and slowly watched as the yellow plasma shooting out of the medigun healed the pegasus guard. That’s odd I might need to find out why my color changed. Arvin stopped, and then bent down the poke at the pony’s head. The fast-paced breathing from earlier had slowed to a gentle, rhythmic, and quiet pace. It had surprised the German that the pony had fallen asleep, but it wasn’t significant.

Scout poked the guard, only to receive a mumble. He looked back up at Shining Armor, “Does this mean we can go now?”

Shining sighed; he knew that couldn’t avoid this anyways. He looked at all the Mercenaries, and then nodded, getting a cheer from the group. Once the group marched away, he looked at the nearest guard and said, “Get me a hidden post nearby the battlefield, if you can find out where it is. Follow the group; it would be easier if you did.” The pegasus guard saluted and then flew into the sky.
The Captain looked back at the building where they had made temporary camp; The Four Dragons. “Let’s go! We need to pack up and be ready by the time our watchman comes back! Let’s go! Move it! Move it! Move it!”

(….)

Scout was running in the general direction of where the shot came from, until he saw the most horrifying creature; it was black with several holes along the bottom of its legs; long, green, oily hair that also had holes in it; a central green section in the middle; wings that belongs to a bug; and a horn that jutted in three different sections, at with a sharp edge at every bend.

It reminded him of the black cloud that had chased him back at one of those Boston parks. He started to back away, but a green aura surrounded him and firmly placed him on the ground with green goo shot from its horn. His heart started to race, but slowed once he noticed his teammates appearing around the corner he had turned. They gasped and Heavy pulled out his Flaming Beast and it had started to whir to the suitable speed. But Engineer pulled his hand in front of gun making Heavy stop the gun and lowering it.

“Who are you?” Engineer asked. “Are you part of RED team?”

The creature giggled. “Who is this RED team you speak of?” It answered in a voice that’s enough for it to classify as female.

Almost immediately, a few people dressed in RED designs and logos appeared, making Scout panic once again, but in a more frantic way. As they slowly walked towards the BLU team, there were black, smaller creatures that looked similar to the large, female creature.

“Hey cockroach!” Scout yelled. “You think you can release me? This has been the second time this happened!”

“Of course not you fool,” The creature snapped. “I’m going to keep you here until—“

RED Spy put his Ambassador against the creature’s head. “Better think twice mademoiselle, or you’re going to be gone in next few seconds.”

The creature gulped, this was the first time that she actually felt defenseless against anyone else other than the time of the end of the invasion.

A smaller, black creature put his hoof on Spy’s leg. “Please don’t hurt our Queen, she’s the only pony we got left.” It looked up at him with begging eyes, almost on the verge of tears.

Spy couldn’t help it and he took the gun off of her head, never once removing his finger off the trigger. He thought he was better than that, but something was off on these “changelings”.

Engineer walked up to the Queen. “Ma’am, will this be where we’re fightin’?”

The Changeling Queen — face blushing with anger — looked at the Engineer. “Yes we will. Do we need to talk about boundaries?”

“Would be greatly appreciated.”

“Very well then,” She raised her head, and explained where the borders were.

It was a fairly small area, to both mercenaries; it was roughly the size of 2-Fort, only with streets, buildings and a small walkway in the middle. Both spawns were inside a casino, directly across from each other with a large street substituting the small river. Complete with an underground sewer system.

As the rules were talked on—such as no changelings unless they have ponies along too, no prisoners, and no magic— Engineer held his hand out. “Do we have an agreement?”

At first, the Queen looked at the gloved hand, but then held out her own hoof. “I accept your terms, my name is Chrysalis.”

Engineer grasped her hoof. “Conagher, Dell Conagher. Hopefully we meet again, just not like this.”

The Queen only grinned in response.

(….)

The pegasus sped back as fast as she can — could’ve even rivaled the Wonderbolts — and found the Royal Guard Captain. Her heart raced, not only at her own haste back to The Four Dragons, but at the fact Queen Chrysalis and their own team shook hooves.

She landed in front of Shining Armor, and briefed everything she can before passing out from exhaustion.

Shining looked at the now downed pegasus before realizing what he had heard, the battle is almost starting!

Quickly, he healed the guard, and woke her up. “Can you lead me towards the battlefield?”

She nodded and then slowly flew back towards the now battling mercenaries. They already started, but it was still safe to land on a top a building, which coincidentally was across the street from the changelings.

Shining Armor wanted to attack them so badly, but it was the mercenaries’ battle, not theirs. So he had turned his head to the field, just in time to see a RED Demoman blown to bits from a BLU Soldier. As Soldier rocket-jumped away with his Festive Black Box, Shining Armor was somewhere else, vomiting whatever he had left of his wife’s cheese omelet.

(…..)

Arvin ran from the spawn room behind Richard. The medic was able to keep up, with the help of the Quick-Fix, and reached into the street. A nearby grenade from an enemy Demoman nearly caused him to explode, but he was saved by a friendly Soldier killing the Scottish man. Arvin reached the inside of the base, this time following Heavy, leaving Scout to do his job.

An announcer yelled into the earpieces of the teams. The announcer was female, but the name she had introduced was not as surprising. Of course she could’ve had better, but apparently the name Speaker Box was the best thing to come to mind. Of course, she reminded them of the old announcer, but at least this one sounded younger and energetic.

As the German reached his Ubercharge, both of them reached the Intel deep inside the building. Once getting it however, RED Spy uncloaked and backstabbed Heavy. Arvin grabbed the briefcase and tried to melee the Spy out of the way, but only ended up getting stabbed on the arm. Medic then pushed the Spy out the way, and then ran out the room.

Once Arvin had reached back outside of the building, he got hit with an arrow through both of his knees. He fell, releasing the briefcase letting it side, only to get picked up by Richard. He crawled as fast as he can, until he saw a RED Pyro appearing. Then saw bright shades of orange before heading into HUD mode.

Richard saw the medic burn, and tried to throw his Flying U towards the Pyro, but missed. He dashed into the building, but not without a splash of vomit hitting his face.

“Alright! Who did that?” He yelled before seeing Shining Armor hanging over the edge of the roof of a nearby building. He sighed, and then ran into the building to bring it back to the intelligence room.

Once there, he placed the briefcase on the table, and opened it to reveal several battle plans. He knew that he would have to leave it here for it to be further investigated, but there was no major base right now. So he would have to look in it very carefully — and hopefully remember— before burning it with the help of the Pyro.

As if on cue, she appeared with a very specially-made Rainblower, no idea why it was called the Rainblower since it only blew fire, but it was maybe because of the design. She removed the filter that has caused her to not be able to be heard clearly, so now she can talk freely along other team members.

“You need anything?” She asked.

“Yea I do,” Richard grabbed the pieces of paper, and piled them on the ground. “Do you think you can burn these?”

If the Pyro could smile with the mask on, then you would see the biggest grin she has done in a while. Without any hesitation, she spewed flames out the flamethrower and just cocked her head to the side. In less than a minute, the pile of papers had turned into nothing but ash.

“Gee, thanks Pyro!”

“No problem! Glad I could help someone.” She replied.

Scout had left the room to restock on ammunition and switch for some new weapons. He really wanted to try out the new bat he had gotten from that store guy. But it can wait once he was facing some ponies.

Once he had reached the spawn room, there were a multiple sticky-bombs sitting at the outside of the door, with a giggling Demoman. But he didn’t last long until his head was blown to bits by Richard’s Force-Of-Nature. It had left a stain on his shirt, but at least it rendered the sticky-bombs useless.

He made a dash into the Spawn Room, seeing no one inside kind of made him a bit uneasy.

As he changed from the bloody shirt, into a fresh, clean one; the announcer spoke. “Now, since the BLU team has successfully captured the RED team’s Intel, it is with my great pleasure to mention that a new objective is in place. The BLU team must hold off the attack of the RED team until the RED team fails to advance any further with invading BLU team’s building, failure to do so will give the RED team the ability to claim the city as theirs. The length you must stronghold the building will be five minutes. Return to the spawn-rooms to restock your ammunition and you must stay there until I give each team the clearance to leave the room.”

Richard rolled his eyes. So basically defend our spot until the RED team would time goes out, great! He took a look into his weapons backpack and found the Changeling Killer. He glared at the bat, and then returned to change his clothes. He stood and finally falling to temptation, Richard grabbed the bat and decided to use it.

The Boston boy stood next to his now appearing teammates, who had all the same glum look on their faces. They knew this would be a big challenge, and are willing to do so. They had to do this multiple times, but this time, it was for a deeper meaning.
As they lined up inside the spawn room, the team grew anxious, for multiple reasons of course.

A few minutes passed, it was obvious that it was either now or never. As Soldier was about to say something — most likely charge — the announcer decided that the BLU team should get started on defenses. The team rushed out, with a battle cry from everyone, it was clear that it would be the best five they would ever have.

(…..)

Shining Armor was standing on top of the building, hiding the best he could with whatever coverage he had. The unicorn stared across the street towards a common enemy; Queen Chrysalis. It took all the endurance he had to not teleport over there and slap the bug out of her. Of course that could be done later, when he actually had the time other than standing and watching the battle.
Shining was getting impatient by the time fifteen minutes passed. The other guards were bored out of their wits and decided to play with some cards. The card games spread crazy like wild fire as soon as the human known as Spy decided that it was time to bring some fun to this world. Nopony knew how to play this “Poker”, or this “Blackjack”. But at least it was taught.

As soon as the Captain decided to play a game, the announcer spoke from the intercoms saying that the game is beginning in ten seconds. But, those seconds was gone before anypony made any popcorn for the next match. Shining looked back at his guards; they were grinning like mad-mares, excited — although the kind of excitement is debatable—, and were a bit jumpy. He sighed, wondering how got this group.

He looked back into the battlefield, and saw the helmeted human jumping back and forth from building and back. How the human never died from the explosions at his feet was anypony’s guess. Shining looked once again towards the other human with a helmeted head, and saw a device that had fascinated him for a while. He kept his thoughts only to him and his guards. The unicorn shuddered at the thought of Twilight talking to him forever about humans and how they never used any magic.

An explosion from a nearby building broke him from his trance; it was close enough to hurt some eardrums, but enough to where nopony was damaged from it. But a limb of Richard sent him back over the edge once again, hurling whatever he had left inside his system. Eventually by the end of this day, he might need to check if his organs are still there.

“Sir, are you okay?” A nearby guard asked.

“I’ll be fine.” The Captain lied, he hated doing it but it works.

“You need to eat,” The guard patted his back. “You’ve been vomiting too much and you need to drink water.”

“Guard, what is your name and rank?”

The guard saluted, “My name is Flash Sentry and I’m First Class Private, why?”

“Then you are promoted to medic reserve,” The Captain coughed. “I’m going to grow a wing if I keep this up.”

“Sir, I don’t know anything about being a medic, or in any case, how to bandage you up.” Flash sighed. “I just use common sense even though most ponies think I don’t have any.”

“Nonsense!” The unicorn exclaimed, giving him another coughing fit. “Everypony has them; some are more different than others. Tell me; are you interested in mares?”

The guard blushed, “I prefer both mares and stallions; but right now, I have my eyes on one specific mare.”

“What is her name?”

“Twilight Sparkle.”

“…” Shining Armor stood there, gaping at what he had just heard. Calm down, maybe it’s just another Twilight! I mean, odds are it’s not my sister! Whatever you do, don’t do it! Do not murder him!

“Sir, are you okay?” Flash waved his hoof in front of Shining.

He shook his head, trying to completely clear what happened in his head. It’ll be easy! Just toss him into the field, and hope for the best!

“Yes, no need to worry,” He gave the best forced smile he can. “So tell me, what does she do for a living?” It better not be my Twily!

“Well, she’s a princ—“ Flash started before somepony grabbed him and took him to the medical tent.

So it’s true, I ought to give her a talk about this guy; he seems suspicious, he’s probably a changeling spying on us! He looked at the Changeling Queen as he thought to himself.

He looked back at the battlefield, two minutes left according to the announcer several seconds ago. Shining Armor hoped that this team wins this one.

(…)

Dell tried as much as he can with his mini-sentries to protect his team, but with the enemy Demoman making surprises with his grenade launcher; it just doesn’t seem to work at all.

So he pulled out his Jag and started to construct larger sentries, fortunately, the Demoman decided not to blow up his dispenser, which made it easier and quicker to build.

Once the sentry was a level three construct, he pulled out his Frontier Justice and just let the kills rack up. As much as gruesome that sounds, at least Dell knew that he did a job well done. Until a Spy tried to put a sapper on his constructs, only to get slain by Sniper with a Bushwacka.

But that left Engineer with his clothes smelling like urine. Something that isn’t easy to get rid of.

Sniper chuckled and then left Dell to do his usual business. As he stepped outside, he was met with Richard who happened to get chased by an enemy Pyro.

The Australian quickly reacted by switching to his Huntsman and pull out an arrow, only for it to catch the flames of the enemy Pyro. Once it was on fire, he took the arrow and jabbed it straight out, hitting the Pyro with intense accuracy into the mid-abdomen. As the tip plunged deeper in; the Pyro paused and then slowly looked up at Sniper. The Pyro then clutched at the arrow, but didn’t make any attempts to pull it out. As the enemy fell, it shifted from the Pyro, into a changeling. The creature looked back up at Sniper with its bright blue eyes, and then the eyes went dim and lifeless. Never did it once mutter a word, but there many whimpers and tears had been shed.

As the ooze of bright green blood came from the chest of the changeling, the announcer said that the battle was officially over due to time running out.

Richard and Sniper both looked at each other after staring at the lifeless body.

Not one word was said between them two about this for a while.

(….)

As the team walked out towards the Carousel Boutique, they started to wonder why they would want to. But overall, it was probably because it was out of boredom. With nothing to do around to do other than help out, it was a boring time for the nine. Ten if you counted that mysterious German Shepard that liked to follow Arvin, Richard, and Pyro around.

Once everyone reached the Boutique, a white unicorn appeared with a rack of white suits. The team looked at the suit blankly, then realized that it meant for them.

A couple tried to walk away, but they were stopped by the Elements surrounding them, except for Rarity of course.

“Now, now, now,” Rarity started. “Would’ve been very rude of you to try and walk away from what you’ve agreed on.”

Scout raised his hand, “I didn’t agree to anything! I just came!”

Rainbow Dash coughed, but nobody understood the joke.

“Well then,” The unicorn started. “I would like a nice line to try these on if you may.”

Spy walked up to Rarity, and then picked her up. “One question if I may.”

“Of course.” She blushed.

“How did you get our measurement without us knowing?”

“I gave her the measurements of our spare uniforms!” Pyro exclaimed.

Spy stared at Pyro, then put Rarity down. “My name is Jacques in case you were wondering.”

The team nodded in agreement and surprise, they didn’t expect for Spy to be so open about that kind of business. But then again, this world has done more outrageous things to the team. Pyro would be a great example.

Once the majority of the team got suited up with their appropriate uniforms, Scout was the only one left.

“No way am I wearing those things! I’ll just stick to my old one.”

Rarity scoffed at him. “You mean those drab things? They’re so gloomy and dreary! These are more suited to your tastes my dear!”

Scout looked at his team; Sniper had a small mark of the purple one’s butt tattoo on his right bicep; Medic has his backpack customized with the quiet one’s tat; Pyro had balloons at the same place where the pink one’s tattoo was; Demoman had weird swirls on his arm; Jacques had diamonds on his right pocket; Heavy had a green apple on his minigun; a few others didn’t have tattoos on them that looked similar to someone else’s mark.

Scout took a look back at his uniform again, no matter how much he didn’t want to deal with it; he was going to be forced.

In fact, it hasn’t been touched at all, not even removed from its own hangar and rack. So Richard decided to take a look at it, almost reflexively, he threw it back at the rack. He didn’t want to know why there was a cloud with a rainbow lightning bolt on it.

“Dude, what’s wrong?”

Richard looked back, only to see the rainbow terror. He knew this was real, and he had to face the truth. Either tell her, or just keep it as it is; grin and move on.

The answer was obviously the latter.

He ignored Rainbow’s question and went inside to put it on. It was difficult to the pants on, but other than that; it was so light and not quite as baggy as the old one. The Boston boy jumped in them, only to fall a bit slower, how he had noticed was a mystery, even to him.

He walked to where everybody was waiting on him; apparently they couldn’t leave unless everyone had worn them and at least approved of it.

Once he had walked, he was suddenly ambushed by the rainbow pony and was asked the usual question.

“How do they feel?”

Richard took a few seconds to stretch, jog in place, do a few arm swings with an air bat, and jumped twice. He took a second to review, and then said, “I like it!”

“Good!” Rarity beamed. “Then you would love the additions I had done to it! I had added a spell in which makes you fall a tad bit slower than what you’re used to.” Explains a lot

“I’ve also added Rainbow Dash’s cutie mark onto where your arm patches go.” Okay, that’s creepy, but I can deal with a rainbow bolt on me right?

“I’ve finally added small tiny wings to remind you who your partner is.”

Scout stood there gawking at the last piece of information given to him. So they’ve decided to make me a flying thingamabob. That’s just great.

He turned towards the rainbow pony, which seemed to try and give him the best poker face she can make. But unfortunately, it didn’t work against him.

“You told her to add wings did you?” Richard pointed a finger towards Dash.

She whistled, trying to pretend that it wasn’t obviously her. But it just made it worse.

“Oh, I’m so going to get you Skittles, and the first thing on the list is that I’m going to slap you so hard, that you’ll become nothing other than gray colors. Now get over here!” He roared.

As soon as he started to run, Dash was already out the door, giggling.

Coaching 101

Knock, knock.

Twilight mumbled, “Five more minutes Celestia.”

Knock, knock, knock.

“Please Celestia, I slept late.”

Bang, bang, bang.

Twilight’s eyes shot open. “Oh, oops. Hehe.” She looked at the clock, it was exactly midnight.

Bang, bang.

“I’m coming, and please stop banging the door!” She yelled, hoping that the baby dragon—scratch that, teenage dragon—wouldn’t wake up. Spike really wanted those times to sleep; it was already difficult to get him to help her without falling asleep.

The unicorn opened the door with her magic, “Hello can I—“

“Skip introductions, do you mind if I crash here tonight?”

“Oh hi there Richard and no you can—“

“Cool! I knew you were willing to help this whole time.” He interrupted.

“Where are your bags?” She sat, folding her forelegs. There were no more room to sleep; the couch was taken by Soldier, and the extra guest room was taken by Sniper. Unless… No, that would never work! “I don’t have anywhere for you to sleep, so you can—“

“Of course you do have room for me to sleep you purple unicorn,” Richard patted her head. “It’s called sharing a bed, no snuggling of course. I had to leave rainbow pony because of that.”

Twilight grunted, “Fine! It’s up the stairs, first door on the right.” The unicorn wanted some tea, but it would just keep her up.

Richard started walking up the stairs, leaving the lavender alicorn wondering what went wrong with between Dash and Richard. She sighed, then shook her clear of the thoughts, and proceeded with going back to sleep.

When she opened her bedroom door, Richard was already sprawled on the bed, leaving a nice sized half of the bed for her. At least he’s aware of me.

She climbed on the bed, trying to keep away from the human. As soon she got comfortable and ready to fall into dreamland, Richard took his arm and slung it over Twilight. She made a small beep, and then fell back asleep, hoping no-one saw them sleeping like this in the morning.

(…)

Twilight awoke to a manly yelp, she looked up, but her head couldn’t see who was at the door because of Richard’s arm in the way. “Wait! It’s not what it looks like!”

“Of course it’s not,” Sniper’s voice was said. “Either that or Richard’s …” He trailed off.

“What,” Twilight panicked, “What’s wrong?”

“Well, I was going to say that if he was to lay with you, his shirt would be on your side. But I found the shirt, it was covering the lamp,” He said.

“So, what does that mean?” she struggled to escape Richard’s arm, but it was like he was trying to use her like a teddy bear.

Sniper shook the bed ferociously “It means that he was just making himself comfortable,” Richard mumbled in his sleep “But it sounds like he’s waking up, better have act like you’re still asleep. He likes to be first to wake up, makes him more, well, confident and more cocky. We usually don’t have an explanation why, but it is what it is mate.”

Before Twilight could reply, Sniper was out the door, leaving a very confused pony next to a waking human. She put her head on the pillow, and acted like she was sleeping.

Richard opened his eyes to find the snoring, lavender pony under his arm. She was fluffy and fuzzy like a teddy bear, but something he wouldn’t want to sleep with every night — the wings were really bony. He rose from the bed, and searched for his shirt. He found it on the pony’s side, but he didn’t know how it got there. Richard saw another shirt on the lamp, but it wasn’t his, it was Soldier’s.

Once he walked out to the hallway, Sniper was standing across the door against the wall. “So how long purple pony was awake?” Richard asked, slipping the shirt over his head.

“Oh about ten minutes before you did,” Sniper smiled and then crossed his arms. “I also told her about how you usually threw your shirt around when you sleep; but instead, I switched your comfortable way with the other way.”

Richard chuckled then leaned against the door way. “So, do you know where the kitchen is? I’m going to see if I could drink all of their OJ if they have any.”

Sniper adjusted his hat. “Good luck with that, the purple dragon that also lives here loves it. That little bugger will be giving you a beatin’ if he ever finds you drinkin’ his stuff.”

Richard chuckled then started to walk down the stairs. “That’s sounds like he needs to share one with others one day.”

“Well he is a dragon.”

“Dragon? Pssh, I’m from Boston,” He flexed his biceps. “If I survived the Boston Marathon, I could survive anything!” He put his fist into the air like he was holding something invisible there.

Sniper laughed, and started to follow Richard down the stairs. “You were already done and gone. By the time the bomb went off, you were already in your hotel room calling some girls that gave you their numbers.”

“By the way, has it already been a year since it had happened? If it has, well, I can say I’m no longer expendable.” He stretched his arms in more ways than one.

“We’re usually never expendable, especially with that one girl you usually try to hang out with.”

“Who would that be,” Richard put a finger to his chin. After a moment of thought, he gave an expression of realization, and then shook his head. “I have no idea who you are talking about, but I have a feeling it’s that one girl that tried interview us that one day.”

“The one that worked for the old announcer?”

“Yea, I think that was her. But anyways, you need to show me where the kitchen is.”

Sniper pointed to a door, next to it was a sign that said ‘kitchen’.

“Oh,” Richard said. “I knew that!”

Sniper rolled his eyes then opened the door leading an empty room.

Richard walked to the fridge and opened it. Since it didn’t have a light to show him what was inside, it was difficult to find it. But he found it hiding behind a sign that said ‘Spike’s stuff! Don’t touch or I’ll HM01 you.’

I bet he doesn’t even get the original reference of that. Richard grinned. He suddenly had a quick flashback of his times on the school bus playing his Gameboy. It was a fun time of playing Yellow, Crystal, Red Rescue Team, Firered, and the occasional Nintendo DS game here and there. But it was difficult whenever it came to his junior year, his brothers loved to take his games. But he also had sports to take care of, especially Track and Field. No one ever defeated him in his field of expertise; especially when it came to the 1800 distance race.

The Bostonian took the cap off the jug, and started to chug it. Once he had finished the container, he threw it into a fireplace in the living room, and it had exploded. Huh, looks like I should throw more stuff into the fireplace and watch it explode more often.

But, once the container exploded, Soldier suddenly burst into the kitchen with his shotgun loaded. “We are being attacked men!” He shouted, jerking his head side-to-side looking for intruders.

“Whoa there pal,” Richard lifted his hands defensively. “Nobody is attacking us, something just exploded in the fireplace.”

Soldier stomped towards the fireplace and stared at it. He grunted, and unloaded his gun. “Alright then, what’s for breakfast? I’m craving for some eggs, toast, milk, and bacon.” His mouth started to drool at the mention of bacon.

“Everything but the bacon, we’re having oatmeal instead.”

Everyone turned to see the lavender alicorn, still wearing her bed-hair; which was somehow stylized to look like she went insane.

“Spike,” She yelled upstairs. “Can you please make us some breakfast? Oh and don’t forget to remind me that I need to get some more OJ.”

“What!” A loud roar came from outside the door, shaking the tree — Tree? Richard thought — and the residents down to the core. Soldier flipped a table over, and cowered behind it with his helmet between his legs for safety.

A loud slam came from the door to show a four-foot tall, purple dragon. Steam came from his nostrils and his eyes were flickering white. Richard jumped into Sniper’s arms —Scooby-Doo style mind you —, and then Sniper jumped on Twilight’s back.

Twilight facehoofed and then used her levitation spell to get Sniper and Richard off her back to place them on a chair next to the flipped over dining table.

“Spike,” Twilight patted his head. “What did I say about scaring our new friends?”

He looked around, and was shocked to see the humans were almost in terror. Then he looked down and then mumbled something.

“What was that?” Twilight put her ear next to the dragon’s mouth.

“I’m sorry.”

“Good!” She smiled. “Now could you please make some breakfast, I wouldn’t want my favorite assistant to suddenly become a second after my pet.” She gave him a smug look.

“Challenge accepted,” He did a somewhat salute and tied a pink apron to himself.

The three mercenaries sat there, wondering how she had calmed him down so quickly. Or was it just that he’s bipolar? Whatever the cause, it had somehow saved them from getting burned.

Twilight looked at the humans with a curious look. Why are they afraid of Spike? It’s not like he hurt anypony; but then again, I’ve never introduced them to each other.

“Say Spike,” The dragon looked up from the stove. “You want to meet our guests?” He nodded.

“Well Spike, meet Soldier,” The human stood straight up, and then saluted. Before getting back down, he put the table in its rightful place and sat in a chair.

Twilight pointed with her hoof to another, “That’s Sniper, although he talks funny, he can be a nice person.” He smiled, and lifted his hat off.

“Pleasure to meet you Spike, my name is Nick. But you may call me Mr. Mundy” He replaced the hat back to its original spot, hiding the somewhat bald head.

Twilight finally pointed at Richard, who happened to try and balance a pencil on the bridge of his nose — what is that and where did it come from? Twilight thought. “His name is Richard and—“

“So that’s what his name is,” Spike interrupted, crossing his arms. “Tell me this, why was he laying with you in bed?”

She blushed, and then she looked down, trying to hide in the shadow of her hair. “He just needed a place to sleep, so I let him sleep in my bed.” Spike raised an eyebrow at the mention of that. “I-I mean, he didn’t do anything!” She stammered. “H-he was already asleep when I walked in.”

“Uh-huh,” Spike nodded. He glared at Richard, who apparently didn’t take any notice in the conversation. But whatever the white things that sticking out his ears where doing, it wasn’t helping him listen. “So, do you have a say in this?”

Mr. Mundy poked in Richard on the back. He took out his headphones, which happened to be blasting indie rock songs. “Yea?” He looked to find the dragon looking daggers at him. “Need anything?”

Spike nodded. “What did you to Twilight last night?”

“Nothing, I just used ink to put some pictures on her stomach and face,” He grabbed the alicorn and moved some fur to reveal writing like; ‘I’m a berry’, ‘my hair is stoopid’, and ‘my horn is faek’. There was also a triangle with an eye in it on her chest, a mock replica of her cutie mark surrounding her mouth, a ninja fighting a horrible drawing of a pony on both sides of her belly, and to top it off; coloring around her eyes to make it look like she had glasses.

Spike tried to not laugh at Richard revealed the ink marks, but he finally let it go when Richard shown the glasses on her face.

Twilight looked at the two. “What’s wrong?” She started to panic but then grew a frown when she had seen the drawing on her belly. “Oh haha, now get me a mirror.”

The human were trying to not laugh, but as soon as Richard came back from Twilight’s room with a full-body mirror, she gasped and it triggered the endless wave of laughter.

Spike held his side, trying to get some air inside of his before talking. “You… should... see the look on your... face,” He wheezed, then fell onto his back in another laughing fit.

Richard stood up, then ushered everybody to calm down after seeing the alicorn in near tears. “Don’t worry,” he patted twilight on the head. “It was just a harmless joke, no need to get so frustrated with it. Just remember that you might need to take a bath to get it off,” He licked his thumb and started to remove ‘My name is Sparkle-Butt’ that was written on her left side next to her cutie mark. But it had smeared across her mark and he tried to remove it before getting a beep from Twilight.

“Please don’t touch my cutie mark,” she coughed, moving away from him. “It’s something personal, and I’d rather clean it myself.”

Richard understood and backed away, not wanting to give anybody the wrong idea. “Alright,” he stood. “Does anybody have any idea on what we are doing today?”

Nick started to answer, but Spike interrupted by burping fire. “Hey! Point that somewhere else mate! I don’t need any more scars!”

Spike apologized and picked up a scroll that came from the flames. He unrolled it and started to read it.

Richard ate his meal of eggs and oatmeal, and then sent Twilight up the stairs to bathe and grabbed himself a can of BONK! before sitting down. Not wanting to be in anyone’s business, he went back to listening to his music filled with rock songs and jazz. After a couple of songs, Mr. Mundy poked him with his scattergun and gave it to him. “What’s this for?” he asked after pulling out the little buds.

Nick grinned. “We’re going to be teachers on how to use our weapons,” he gave his Machina a quick look before adjusting the high-quality scope. ”And that means you have to work with Dash.”

“You mean I have to teach Rainbow Dash how to use my weapons?” he scoffed. “I am not gonna do that. I’ll die before I have to be near that little fluff-ball again.”

“Not before I cuddle you to death,” a female voice from outside the kitchen said.

Richard looked out from the kitchen, and saw that Twilight’s friends came walking in the front door. There was also a red stallion and a zebra, but he didn’t know who they were but they seemed to be talking quite friendly towards the others. Rainbow Dash was hovering by the door, giving her the ability to hear about what’s going on inside the room.

Richard gave a grin, then slammed to door, and looked around the room to find that the dragon somehow disappeared. “Any idea where that scaly thing went?”

“He left about twenty minutes ago after eating but he’s outside,” Nick said while polishing his weapon. “Soldier is already outside and talking with Spike; Twilight already bathed, but she’s waiting for me; and the rest of our teammates will be here shortly once they had gathered their weapons.”

Richard sighed, and then walked out to the main room where he was suddenly tackled by Skittles. “I’m going to start teaching you how be awesome like me,” she said, raising a hoof towards her chest.

“You mean how to be less awesome?” he picked up the pony and placed her on the couch.

Dash laughed at his remark then got up and poked him. “I’m already the very best, nopony ever was,” she was prodding his chest with every word she said. “And I’m going to prove it by being the faster than you!”

He laughed and then picked up his scattergun. “Well the plan is that I’m going to teach you how to use this baby,” he loaded a few shells into his Baby Face Blaster, and then aimed it at Dash’s head. “But first, I must teach you how to use the basic scattergun,” He placed the Blaster on the ground. “Did you at least grab my duffel bag?”

Dash put a hoof on her chin and then smiled sheepishly. “Of course I did, I just placed it somewhere else.” She went flying out the door, leaving a small rainbow trail behind her.

By this time, every team member was there and busy talking with their respective partners. Dell was talking with Applejack about how the mechanic of his devices worked; Heavy was eating a sanvich while the red stallion was just standing there eating a granny smith; Demoman was drinking from his bottle while the zebra was speaking in rhymes — is she a rapper of some sort? Richard thought; Nick was talking with Twilight how hold a gun without her magic; Pyro was listening to Pinkie Pie (without her suit of course), then saw Richard looking at her and she mouthed ‘Help me’; Medic was having an intense debate about how he could help heal Fluttershy’s animals quicker, but she didn’t trust the medigun just yet; Spy surprisingly had his mask off — he had the look of an unshaven beard and short black hair — and was talking to Rarity about the disguise kit; and there was the uniformed German Shepard that was just sitting next to Richard, lolling his tongue and wanted to be petted.

Richard did what the dog wanted and waiting for Dash to reappear, she soon did and before she wanted to talk more about how the scattergun that had her cutie mark and her coat color, Twilight interrupted everybody with an announcement.

“Everypo-body, please follow me and the sooner we do, the sooner that we can learn from our partners,” she started walking out the front door, leading the mass group out into the mid-morning day.

Everypony was staring at them with glee because not only that they had saved the people in Los Pegasus; they had also defended against a villain and claimed the land for the solar princess. Some were from the city and wanted to congratulate the mercenaries and wanted some autographs. Dash wanted to be popular like them, but she knew it’ll come when she joins the Wonderbolts, if not fighting for Celestia.

While the mercenaries were signing things from books to weapon fragments from the battle, the ponies were whispering into their ears urging them to hurry up. Unfortunately Richard was just eating it up, more like gobbling or wolfing it, leaving Dash a bit jealous of him. Once the crowd had died down, Richard noticed that a couple of mares wanted to be with him a bit more, but Rainbow Dash grabbed his shirt before he got any further; leaving the poor mares daydreaming what would happen if the weather pony decided to not be selfish and share.

More walking led out to the town park, a wide and vast place to start shooting. Richard placed his duffel bag on the ground and grabbed some rope from it. He looked around to find Dash talking to Applejack. Once he gotten close enough, he tackled Dash and tied her wings to her body. Applejack watched, but didn’t even lift a hoof to help her pegasus friend.

Once he finished, Dash sat there trying to remove the rope. But he had tied a knot that could only be removed by cutting it. “Now, the first thing that you must know is that your enemies are people that cannot fly,” by now, she had stopped struggling and stood up.

“Then that means I have a greater advantage,” she exclaimed.

“But it’s not fair,” he lifted a finger to her mouth so she couldn’t respond. “The first thing about this battle is that we all walk on the ground. The only reason we would fly is that is everyone was able to fly, but we all walk on the ground. Now, let’s begin with sprinting and running long distances, and once you got the hang of that, then maybe we could learn how to double jump.”

(…)

A small bottle of cola stood and the stand.

Ping!

The bottle fell, but then was placed back up with a purple aura.

Ping!

The bottle had fallen over again.

“Nice shot mate,” Nick said, showing her how to load another clip into the basic sniper rifle. “Two in a row, ought to give you my job. Now let’s try and shoot moving targets shall we?”

Twilight lit her horn and the purple aura surrounded the bottle once more, but instead, it was moving in an unorthodox fashion; up, down, left, right, and even forwards and backwards.

She focused, and then let a round loose. It hit the bottle, but it didn’t go down. She let another fire, but this time it had hit the top of the bottle, shattering it into fragments of glass.

Twilight grinned, and then looked at Nick who was giving her a look of satisfaction. “Now, you must know that your enemies are not simply bottles of cola. They are changelings and would most likely look like your teammates in red colored clothing.”

“But, what if a teammate decides to try and attack me?” she asked in wonder.

“Then by all means kill them,” he paused, letting that one sink in. “the best possibility is that you cannot harm them, but sometimes they get hurt. If this happens, use your blade if they are close, or use your SMG when they are at a medium distance. Most of the time, the one trying to attack you that’s on your team is an enemy Spy. They will try to backstab you, but you have to be careful about letting one go. They sometimes turn invisible by what’s called cloaking.”

Twilight looked at her rifle then back up at Nick. There were so many things to learn, but hopefully the next assignment is not really difficult. “Anything else I should learn?”

Nick thought for a second. “Nope, there’s not really much that I can teach you now. Most of the things you will be learning will be on the battlefield and can only be learned by experience.”

Once he had said that, Spike landed after falling from the sky. His feet were a bit charred and he had the Rocket Jumper on his shoulder. “Woohoo! That was fun! Hey Jane Doe, you think you can teach me more tricks?”

Soldier appeared and then patted the dragon on the head. “Of course private, never seen anybody so eager about this before,” he smiled.

“That’s because we don’t want to get blown up at the first shot mate!” Nick exclaimed.

“Hey! It took me weeks to master the art!” Soldier pointed a finger towards Nick.

“It took me days you old geezers!” Pyro appeared with Pinkie in a similar suit, both holding multiple versions of the original flamethrower.

“Hey Jennifer,” Pinkie stood on her hind legs. “Watch this!” She pointed the flamethrower at her feet and then used the air compression to launch herself from the group of people. “Wee…” she trailed off, flying through the air until she became a speck in the sky. With a twinkle, there was a flash of light where she had disappeared and there was also a small ting sound.

Jennifer facepalmed and then walked in the general direction of the party menace, leaving the group to wonder how Pinkie would be able to get back.

Twilight nudged Nick knee. “I think it’s time for everypony to gather up again.”

He looked up to the sky, and saw that the sun was soon going to touch the shortest mountain. He agreed and started to follow the alicorn.

Richard jumped over Nick with Dash trailing behind only by a fraction, and also double-jumped whenever he did.

“Looks like we now got two hotheads we got to worry ‘bout,” Nick queered.

(…..)

Apparently, once everybody appeared at the middle of the park; Celestia was supposed to appear but she had some planning she had to do with Shining Armor about the next assignment. Only this time they were to relax for a week due to Manehatten and Appleloosa being taken over by the changelings. The possibility of having to go to Hoofington was very high, with Baltimare being next in line.

For the humans, it meant that they were actually relieved that there some kind of break. But unfortunately, it also meant that they had more time to teach the little ponies about their own jobs, and the dangers of being that specific class.

From Night, to Day, and back!

Jennifer followed Pinkie’s trail for a while, the result ended her landing on top of a tree in front of Fluttershy’s cottage, and how she landed here was just some logic that she probably didn’t understand. As she lifted the little, sleeping pony out of the tree and to her shoulder, a small rabbit was softly tugging on her pant leg pointing with its paw towards a smoke in the nearby, dark forest.

The pyromaniac stared at the smoke, then at the shadows in the forest, and finally back at the white bunny who, by body language, was begging for her to do something.

Jennifer thought for a moment, then decided to walk away. She had stayed for too long, and the others were probably getting worried. But the bunny just wouldn’t allow this decision to happen. He tried pulling on the boot, but it couldn’t get a good grip on the rubber. It had tried squeaking as loud as it can, but to no avail.

Soon, Jennifer had reached the edge of the park with the small bunny on her shoulder, patting its foot in impatience, and then left when it saw Fluttershy with Arvin. She had seen that everybody was quickly going to leave, but with the sleeping Pinkie on her, she started to walk towards Sugarcube Corner to lay her to rest.

Once arriving however, a trio of fillies was walking out the front door, with the obvious smears across their faces of milkshakes. They were talking about how they could get their cutie marks in candy making. But judging from the way they acted, Jennifer concluded, they would probably end up eating it or get in some kind of sticky mess.

She walked inside, seeing Mr. and Mrs. Cake at the cashier stand, Jennifer asked where she could put Pinkie Pie to bed.

“Her room is up the stairs and the second door on your left,” Mrs. Cake said. “You can’t miss it, it says Pinkie’s room.”

Jennifer walked up the stairs, the sleeping pony still softly snoring away on her shoulder, and saw the door to her room. When she opened it however, the intensity of the color pink was overwhelming and nearly fallen back when a couple of balloons got pushed into her face.

But she had calmed down and shoved herself into the pink room, until once again; she was attacked by some confetti.

“What’s next?” she muttered to herself. “A small alligator with no teeth trying to bite me to death?” She chuckled at the thought of that, but no amount of preparedness had prevented her from ever being so right.

As Gummy landed Jennifer’s head, he tried to chew on the small breather and seeing the small gator; Jennifer nearly dropped Pinkie and screamed until she had noticed that she wasn’t in pain from the biting. She stood there, letting the scaly creature think it’s winning this battle.

After a few minutes, she set Pinkie down on the bed with Gummy still trying to chew his way into her mask. She grabbed him and placed him in Pinkie’s hair, where he tried to chew through her mane. I bet it even tastes like cotton candy, but I’m not even going to try; wouldn’t want her hair in my mouth. She thought.

After Jennifer placed a blanket over the pony, Pinkie snuggled with it and tried to get into a comfortable position. The pyromaniac then walked out of the room, leaving Pinkie to deal with her dreams of sweets and chocolate rain.

Jennifer walked down into the basement, and flicked on the light.

Everywhere, there were metals such as hooks and sharp objects. In the center, there was a table similar to surgeon’s operation stand and many tools surrounding it. There mysterious stain here and there on the table but it was difficult to tell if it was fresh or dry. There were many colorful items that looked very similar to unicorn horns and pegasi wings. The room had a dark red hue, but that was because of the light bulb, which used magic by a red magic-colored unicorn apparently. It was creepy at first, but once getting used to it, it reminded her of a darkroom whenever she watched movies that were from the 80’s.

But it was the owner of the small shop that may surprise — or not — many people.

“Hey Jennifer,” Mr. Cake yelled down the stairs. “Whenever you’re done messing with your tools, can you help me feed a couple of griffons?”

“Of course,” She replied gleefully. “I got to pay back your hospitality somehow.” The pyro started to take off her suit and was dressed how she normally was, like a video game character she loved to dress up as.

“How many times to I have to tell you; there’s no need to do such things.”

“You keep thinking that, I’ll have to ask for the Princess to pay you a full week vacation.” She had put her hair in a ponytail and tied it off with a hair-tie.

There was a pause. “Like I said, you don’t have to do this.”

“No need to worry! In debt or not, I’ll pay you back one way or another to make you happy.”

Mr. Cake sighed. “You’re more stubborn than my wife.” There was a barely audible ‘hey’ a few seconds after that.

“I’m only stubborn when it comes to paying people off.” Jennifer put Pinkie’s flamethrower on the table, hoping that it would stop leaking gasoline and propane gas.

“Have it your way, be up in about twenty minutes.” Mr. Cake closed the door to the basement.

She chuckled, and then went back to try and fix the pony-made weapon. It was going to be a while before it was actually to the power of her basic flamethrower, but it could be done in a night.

She pulled one of the unicorn-looking horns—which was actually a pipe sealing holder— and put it where the propane tank met the rubber pipe. She then turned on the propane tank and lit it with a lighter she had, causing a small flame to appear at the end of the muzzle of the weapon.

But before she got any further, she checked to clock and found that it was only three minutes before she had to do work. Once the flamethrower was turned off, the propane tank safely put away, and the gasoline tanks nowhere near a flame, Jennifer went upstairs. When she closed the door, she locked it and put the key inside her jumpsuit.

It was just another day for the pyro.

(…..)

Big Macintosh watched Heavy pull the cart of apples. He was astonished how Heavy could do it with just on hand, and was even more surprised when Heavy just walked it off like it was just a shopping bag. But whenever he placed where it needed to be, he flipped the entire cart over and repeated the process once again.

Of course Big Mac was on break for about ten minutes, but Heavy just couldn’t stop. The red stallion forgot what Heavy’s official name was; it was something like Mike-Hail or Misha or something like that. Mac just kept it at Mikhail and left it at that. Whenever he said that name at Heavy, he never corrected him so that was the end of Big Mac’s doubt.

Whatever Heavy did to him though, it had caused him to be more talkative. He used to just say yes or no, but instead, he actually gave reason behind his responses. It kind of freaked him out like how Dell’s teleporter worked, but it was at least something that he could talk about with the family at dinner times.

Big Macintosh was mostly concerned about Applejack; she was yelling at him for being at mathematical and whatnot, but he just couldn’t understand how she could build these devices without learning it; so much for her being the smart one of the family. But he was more concerned with Applejack’s relations with Dell; it seems like she wants to be his special somepony, but Dell just won’t notice the hints. Or for that matter, doesn’t even care. Should give him a talk later on about her, he thought, would be a real shame if Applejack decided that she would make the first move and embarrassed herself.

The stallion looked up into the sky, and then went back to work. He’ll want to think more about this situation, but only after his daily philosophical lessons he gives himself — recently he bought himself a book after getting a decent buy from Filthy Rich, and decided to put his extra time to use. The extra time that he found out he had, was extreme. It was wonder that he didn’t decide to take an extra job to help the family. With about fifty hours of extra time a week, he might as well take on a new hobby; like building furniture for instance. What’s even better, since the new two mercenaries appeared and decided to help with the farm, he might as well add seven more hours. Work has been getting quicker and somewhat easier, but that doesn’t mean the farm is pooling in more bits. Macintosh sighed, and walked up to Mikhail and asked where he could find a cart.

Mikhail pointed down the road and Macintosh found a cart filled to the brim with apples. Work may be quicker and easier, but doesn’t mean that the apples got any lighter. He sighed again then latched himself up, and started to work again.

(….)

Demoman watched a zebra brew a potion. As soon she finished, she drank the purple liquid, and her eyes instantly grew half-lidded.

“Now that I have some help to keep,” she rhymed. “I may be able to sleep. Someday, I wish I can get this speech gone. But at the moment, it’s like I have a leech ‘mon.”

Demoman facepalmed, and then gave the zebra a hard, repeated slap across her face. He went from backhand, to front hand, then backhand again, repeating the process a couple more times.

Once Demoman’s hand started to hurt by occasionally slapping the zebra’s golden earrings, he stopped and picked up the zebra, which was near to tears. “Now tell me where it hurts on you,” he said.

The zebra moaned. “It hurts my everything,” she whimpered. “Please tell me, why did you do that?”

“Did ye not lis’en to wha’ cha said?” Demoman said.

The zebra had thought for moment then lain back down. “I’ve forgot. Can you please tell me what I said?”

“Ye no longa’ rhyme like a poet,” He patted the zebra’s head. “An in case ye has forgotten, me name is Tavish Degroot. “

Tavish picked up the zebra, and then sat down to place her in his lap. He started petting her, but no longer after, she had fallen asleep. Tavish shook his head, then went to bed to lie down in, and then placed her on top him. As soon as his head touched the pillow, Tavish soon followed the zebra into a deep sleep, ignoring the loud animal growls and the occasional howls of the Everfree Forest outside of the tree house.

(……)

Fluttershy was having a difficult time trying to get into Arvin’s backpack. No matter how many times she had tried to grab the zipper, her large hooves aren’t able to grab the tiny thing. This time however, she tried her teeth, but the metallic taste to her mouth felt off to her mouth, so she reflexively let go.

She looked at the bed Arvin was laying on, the darkness of the night made it hard for her to see if he was awake; but by the soft snoring, she concluded that she had a couple more tries before he actually woke up.

She once again reached for the zipper, but this time she didn’t let go no matter how badly her mind told her not to. She pulled the zipper up, making its trademark zip sound, and was already halfway finished with opening it.

Once she reached the end of the zipper trail, Fluttershy poked her nose into it. Her mission was simple; grab the thing she wanted very badly, and then escape without him waking up.

The pegasus’ muzzle touched something that made a crumple noise whenever it was touched. She grabbed a couple of the packages with her mouth, and placed them next to the pack. Fluttershy looked at the bed; Arvin was still asleep. She zipped up the pack and looked again; he was still asleep.

Something feels very wrong with this situation, but she grabbed the packages again and slowly walked out of the room. Once she reached the doorway, she closed the door softly and walked back to her room down the hallway. She opened the door, and looked inside. Seeing nobody in there, the butter-colored thief slowly walked in and put the packages on her bed.

She grabbed one of the packages and ripped the top open. Fluttershy then looked around and saw nothing yet again, she opened her mouth and started to pour the items inside the package inside her mouth and chewed.

Fluttershy couldn’t get enough of the Skittles that Arvin had given her that day. Although she knew it was probably wrong for her to steal it, she did it anyways. Arvin would probably never notice that there was a couple missing, since his bag had the same dimensional ability as Pinkie.

How they found out how it was possible was that they brought it over to Pinkie and she grabbed a war hammer about the size of Celestia. She also grabbed her party cannon, a large cake, and Celestia herself! How the princess got in there was a mystery, but Arvin then grabbed a bouquet of roses and gave it to Celestia since he had nothing to do with it — Celestia blushed and then walked away funny. There were many other things he had grabbed, like a glass bottle of Coke, a solar charger from many reasons nopony knew, and a violin and cello — Pinkie grabbed the violin and started playing with Arvin, it was a light tune and it was entertaining, and it had sounded like it belonged to a musical about snow and letting it go.

Fluttershy sighed, then opened another bag of Skittles, this time it was a dark blue bag instead of the usual red. She ate the small berry flavors, and started to wonder why she hasn’t grabbed any different kinds of candy. She lifted her head at that thought and wondered what else Arvin knew about the candy world. She started salivating at an imaginary flavor that will probably make her feel like she was in paradise. Oh how she loathed the fact that Arvin gets to make a decision about what he wanted while she only had her Skittles.

Fluttershy grabbed the wrappers and walked down to the living room, where her fireplace was, and threw them into the fire; where it had burned into nothing but ash and smoke. Afterwards, she put out the fire for the fear of one her animals accidentally falling into the fire pit and burning themselves. The pegasus then walked back into her room and lain down on her bed; but before she had fallen asleep, she lit an oil burner that was filled with dried, green leaves and let it burn out.

She inhaled the smoke coming from the oil burner, then giggled, and fallen into a deep sleep.

(…)

Upon awakening, Jacques lifted a white pony off of him. Rarity was certainly a rough sleeper, but why couldn’t she have gotten a bigger bed?

As Jacques thought, Rarity climbed upon his torso and then latched on to him in a death grip. He tried to remove her, but just couldn’t find a way to, so he gave up and decided that it was for the best that he had a chest protector from an oncoming filly who hugged him every morning.

The spy sighed, and then went to the kitchen to find Rarity’s parents eating breakfast. “Bonjour,” he said, startling the two ponies. “How may I help you?”

“Ahh, so it seems that she has found one of Equestria’s heroes to become her special somepony,” the stallion said. “It was always Rarity’s taste to fall for somepony so, coveted.”

Jacques raised an eyebrow, but then noticed what he was implying. “I’m sorry to disappoint monsieur,” he closed his palms and did a light bow. “But I’m afraid that you’re getting the wrong idea here.”

“No need to be ashamed,” the mare reassured. “It’s okay if you don’t want to admit it, but we’ll keep a secret for you.”

Jacques thought about it for a second, would he like to keep this up and play it out? Or would he just admit the truth and disappoint the two people in front of him how happened to be Rarity’s parents?

As he had opened his mouth, he was saved by the Belle. “Bonjour Jacques! Would you like some breakfast?” Sweetie Belle squeaked.

Jacques nodded and followed her into the kitchen, with Rarity still on his chest, Sweetie Belle hugged his legs. “You know you’re going to get your morning hugs every day until you’re Rarity’s special somepony!” she smiled, her teeth gleaming.

Jacques smiled, at least this kid got spunk and willing to admit it. Used to remind him of someone else when this person was little, always tried to become the better one in the family, although everyone else was older.

Jacques went into a flashback of the boy’s first gift on Christmas, a baseball bat. How he had always tried to make the home run on his team, but unfortunately, he decided to try other sports rather than baseball. The Frenchman sighed; he missed the boy, and often wondered where he is right now.

After he had limited contact with the woman he loved, he couldn’t keep up with the family development. He had taken her out to fantastic dinners, but she always asked about the money he was suddenly earning. He always told her it from the job he was doing and left it at that. The actual job was the mercenary work he is doing today, well, the contract he had last time. It wasn’t until Richard joined the team that he started to wonder if that Richard was his son. There many ideas, but he left it at the fact it was a possibility, but very low.

As Jacques scratched his beard, Rarity started moaning, and then he decided that he had to try and wake her up. For one; it was inappropriate for Sweetie Belle to hear such moans, and two; her parents might think that he was doing something to Rarity.

He tried ruffling her mane, bending her ears, and pinching her. But that only made Rarity’s moans more intense. Jacques then rolled on the ground, lifted his knee to kick her, and even pulled her tail; but it just got worse. He walked out of the kitchen and then grabbed some black paint. If she wasn’t going to wake up, then might as well use her as practice for his drawing skills. Soon, he reached Rarity’s bedroom and looked at a mirror, and started to write a message backwards. He reached the ending and let it dry up before heading to the kitchen.

“Sweetie Belle,” She looked up at Jacques. “Do you think you can get me a cup of ice water?”

“Sure thing,” Her voice cracked. “You’re not going to wake up Rarity are you?” She looked at the marks on Rarity’s back, then handed the Frenchman the cup. “Because she’s going to rage as soon as she sees this.”

He patted her head. “I know; that’s why I’m going to do it. Now, close your ears when she wakes up.”

Sweetie winked, and then pulled on her ears. Jacques then slowly tilted the water into Rarity’s mane, as soon as it touched however; she shrieked and then pulled Jacques closer to her body.

“Bonjour mademoiselle Rarity,” she looked up at him, then noticed what she was doing and let go.

“I apologize,” Rarity said. “It was very rude for me to have done that to you.”

“Also,” he started. “You might need to check your coat whenever you take a bath, preferably a mirror so you can tell what it is.”

The unicorn raised an eyebrow in confusion, and then started to walk out the kitchen. But as soon as she left, her parents slowly appeared with the biggest grins on their faces.

“So, do you find our daughter suitable?” Rarity’s father asked, and then winked.

Jacques answered with a sigh. “In way, yes.”

“Good!” Rarity’s mother exclaimed. “Give us the invitations whenever you’re ready.” They both left the building after that.

Jacques then noticed what he had agreed to, and then did a double facepalm; quadruple if he could grow extra arms.

Later he heard a scream. Jacques then tried to teach Sweetie Belle how to use her cuteness as a weapon, and waited for the upcoming rant about her coat and how it’s going to have to be bleached multiple times to get the paint out.

(…)

Richard was having a completely different day compared to everyone else, if anything; it was that Rainbow Dash was using her new skill of double jumping in her flying routine. So she had challenged both of them to an obstacle course made up of only clouds. Most of it required them to double jump and use their skill of shooting to take out many cloud-targets. Of course Richard agreed, but then changed all the bullets to tiny dried pieces of bread; same weight as a bullet, painful as a paintball with the bursting slap included.

But Dash wanted to use real bullets, but then she noticed that dried bread was about the same when Richard shot her out of the sky. It had hit her in multiple spots on the left side of her, but it didn’t cause any damage to her wings. Just bruises.

But currently, he was currently trying to keep Dash away from him using the Force-of-Nature. It had kept her away, but he was running out of shotgun-bread-shells, and she was using the Baby Face Blaster. Apparently the abilities of the guns worked with the modified shells, and Dash was just learning how to use the gun in her advantage, which was basically running around.

“Dash!” the Bostonian yelled. “If you continue running, I’m going to start calling you Scootaloo!”

“Hey!” an orange filly from the makeshift stands yelled. “I’m still learning how to fly you jerk!”

“Sorry,” he apologized, but then shot another bullet at Dash causing her to knock over, and trip.

The rainbow-mane pony got up and then started to run straight towards him with the Holy Mackerel. He turned around and then grabbed his Changeling Killer, and swung straight at her right side.

She fell once again, but there was the drawback to the weapon Richard used which caused him intense pain to the arm he was carrying it. He hadn’t grown quite used to it, especially when he used it back at Los Pegasus.

So Richard doubled over and in an instant, Scootaloo was at his side trying to get him up. “Hey Richard,” she said softly. “Are you okay?”

He chuckled, and then looked at his arm, but what he saw almost made him pass out.

What happened to his arm was that his hand had turned black and it had reached from there to a few inches above his elbow. What’s even worse was that upon his forearm and hand was that it had various-sized holes that were through and through. So when he looked at his hand, in the dead center was a hole the size of a quarter and on the other side was Rainbow Dash looking at it in horror.

Dash was in tears. “Hey, are you okay?” Richard asked, reaching with his other hand.

She pushed his arm away. “No!” She screamed. “How could you lie to me? I thought we were friends!”

Richard was confused at this sudden outburst. But before he could respond, Dash grabbed Scootaloo and then flew straight down, bursting the cloud and leaving Richard on a lonely island.

“Man, this feels even more awkward than the time I disguised as a high school track athlete to get girls.” He said to no one in particular. The Bostonian then did the next best thing to he could do; make the cloud as comfortable as he can before changing it into a recliner, put in his earbuds, lay back to relax, and check if the other arm had damage.

For sure, the other arm had the same exact result before being engulfed in a green flame, turning back to normal.

The next four hours, all Richard did was learning about his new arm powers, forgetting the fact that the changeling bat was still touching his back.

Author's Note

By the way, I do not condone slapping Zecora. Don't do it, it'll come back at you eventually.
Apparently, I've already started on the chapter after this and I've forgotten about using the AN section.
Just so you know, I also have this other fic I've been working on, but it's undergoing some patching up and some weird black holes (Don't forget exploding planets) appearing here and there.

Next time!
Will Richard use his new powers for troll, or good?
What was in Fluttershy's oil lamp?
Will Jacques live up to his promise to Rarity's parents?
How did Pinkie land on Fluttershy's tree after flying into the sky and disappearing?
Will Celestia ever stop making excuses and actually do something worthwhile?

"How many time to I have to tell you? These are reasonable."
No they're not, you lie!
"Fine then, four days in the dungeon of cuddles."
No wait! I'm sorry! I'm allergic to cuteness!
*Gets tossed into a room filled with fillies*
NOOOOOooooooo......

The unexpected occurs, also known as, >:3 (Get in the car)

After dropping Scootaloo off at home — which was by the way, in downtown Ponyville — Dash flew as fast as she can towards Fluttershy’s cottage. Upon arriving however, Arvin was busy feeding the animals instead of the usual Fluttershy. He was humming himself a happy tune, it sounded like it belonged to that song he and Pinkie played; it was however, cut off when he muttered ‘do you want to build a snowman army? Please come out and play.’

Dash somewhat giggled at the silly antics, but it had gotten his attention. “Yes, what do you want?” he asked.

“Where’s Fluttershy?” she replied. “I need to talk to her about somepony.”

“Well,” the German put a finger to his chin. “Last I heard, she was eating candy in her room. But if you can speak to Fluttershy about it, you can speak about it to me. I’ll be sure to carry the news to her.”

Dash sighed and took a deep breath. “Tell Fluttershy that Richard is a changeling and I need somepony to talk to him about—“

Arvin placed a finger on Dash’s lips. “I’ll go deal with him, lead me to him. I am the medic after all.” He then went inside, but didn’t come out until five minutes later with his backpack and medigun.

Once they had arrived to where Richard was last seen, he was on the ground with his face in the dirt. Nearby, Cloud Kicker was standing next to him, trying to see if he was alive. Rainbow Dash flew towards Cloud Kicker and started to talk to her. Meanwhile, Arvin walked towards Richard and turned on the medigun. In less than ten seconds, Richard was back on his feet.

“Hey, do you remember those changelings back at Los Pegasus?” Richard said.

“Of course I do,” Arvin shuddered. “It’s still creepy that they were bugs instead of actual creatures; but what of them?”

“Well, I found this weapon,” Richard leaned closer. “And apparently after long usage, I also turn into a changeling.”

Arvin gasped, but then saw what Richard was mentioning when he shown Arvin how his arm changed. When he changed his arm however, his body also changed with him. Richard had a sort-of freak out, but it changed when he noticed the power of his body.

“I’ve tried other people,” Richard started. “And come to find out, I can basically do everybody, no matter what species.”

Arvin clapped his hands in glee. “Be Archimedes!”

Richard then, unceremoniously, changed into the dove that had been stuck inside of him for the longest time. “Can you hear me? Say yes or no.”

“Huh,” Arvin picked up Richard. “Looks like you can speak normally. And yes, I can hear you.”

Richard cooed, and then changed into Queen Chrysalis. Why he changed into this person, was to find out if anyone knew this person. Well, anypony since how they reacted to him, having changeling powers and all.

“Hey Richard,” Arvin spoke. “Do you think I use that bat to become a changeling also?”

Richard was having a hard time standing on all fours, but got the hang of it and put a hoof to his chin. He spoke in the changeling’s voice. “Sure why not? What harm would it do?” He then changed into Princess Celestia and then walked towards Cloud Kicker and Rainbow Dash — after he had handled the bat over to the medic. They didn’t notice him, so he just sat and watched the conversation turn into a heated argument.

“No!” Cloud Kicker yelled. “Just because you left him, doesn’t mean that you still have dibs over him!”

“I don’t care!” Dash stomped her hood to the ground. “I just went over my head, but he’s still Richard. At least, I thought he was,” She muttered.

“What do you mean, he was?” Cloud Kicker’s face turned from angry to curious.

“I was playing a game with him, and when I swung my bat at him, he also swung his and I got hit,” Kicker winced. “After I got up and tried to hit him again, he was looking at his arm and then I saw one of the only things that might give me nightmares for the longest time,” Dash’s lower lip quivered.

“Hey Dash,” Kicker placed a hoof on her back. “You don’t have to tell me what exactly happened, it’s alright.”

“No, I got to tell you,” Dash sat straight up. “The thing that would cause me to have nightmares would be that he is a changeling.”

Kicker gasped. “Well, can you tell me where he is so I can talk to him?”

“Yes, please do tell,” Richard finally spoke, startling the two mares.

“P-p-princess Celestia!” both mares bowed.

“Please, skip the introductions and tell me where he is.” On the inside, Richard was just dying with laughter. He tried very hard to keep a stern face, but it just difficult.

“H-he’s over the…“ Dash trailed off. She tried finding him where Arvin was, but he was just sitting alone, staring at the sky. “Well, he was over there.”

“Well, you have failed to keep him with you. I’m afraid that a punishment must be in place,” He said.

Dash eyes grew about twice its size. “I’m sorry!” she went to a begging position. “I’ll find him and get him back!”

“How can I trust you after failing?” He gave her an angry look to make her even more terrified. He then looked at Cloud Kicker. “I trust you more, find him, and then bring him here.”

She saluted, and then sped away towards Ponyville. Richard then looked at Arvin. “I want you keep watch over Rainbow Dash, I’ll trust you to do so.” He smiled and then winked.

Arvin looked at Richard, and then walked over to Dash and hugged her. He then started to calm Dash after her being terrified to death.

Richard then sat, looking over the small town. Would he want to continue doing this, cause more terror to Rainbow Dash for revenge, or just go downtown and scare even more people?

As he was making his decision, Cloud Kicker re-appeared with another pony. “I have found this other pony, she said she was the actual one, but I’m going to let you decide. I believe that it’s actually Richard, but I cannot tell.”

“Very well then,” Richard turned to see the new pony. “Hello, so I’m assuming you are the false pony.”

“No, I am not the fake one,” Celestia spoke, following Cloud Kicker. “Maybe it’s you that is the fake one.”

“So you say,” Richard put his disguised hoof to his chin. “Then tell me, did you know that Chrysalis is actually plotting to take over Ponyville to make sure that my team isn’t able to rest peacefully?” Richard didn’t know where this information came from, but somehow, he knew it was the truth. It had also contained strategies and some spies are placed throughout the small town. If anything, he could actually talk to and command them. It was like he suddenly got access to a system, like becoming a moderator of a very large website; something large like YouTube.

“You’re bluffing,” The real Celestia said. “Chrysalis wouldn’t…” She stopped, and then her jaw dropped.

“I’m right, I can assure you,” Richard said.

“And how you knew of my plans is virtually impossible,” a voice behind him spoke.

Richard slowly turned around, and saw that Queen Chrysalis was right behind him. “Holy crap, it’s the giant cockroach.”

The queen leered at Richard. “Now I know who you are, and before you hurt yourself; you are going to have to change back.”

Richard changed back to his human form, leaving Celestia with the biggest, bulging eyes she possibly ever had. With a team member a changeling, Chrysalis plotting an attack on Ponyville, making the attack happen on the same day, appearing in town just to talk to the team only to be attacked, and not getting her daily cake; who wouldn’t be surprised and evermore pissed at the one attacking?

Celestia walked slowly towards to the Changeling Queen, but before she got any closer; Richard transformed into a lion and jumped in front of the alicorn. “I’m going to stop you before you do anything foolish.”

Chrysalis chuckled. “Looks like the new changeling on my side.”

Richard turned to look at the Queen. “Who said that I was stopping her for you?”

The queen’s eyes grew larger, and then snuck a look at the sun goddess. She was virtually glowing and Celestia’s eyes were also flashing a bright white. Richard tried to push her away, but she seemed to get closer by inches. His paws were digging into the ground and were also leaving a skid mark.

Chrysalis backed away from Celestia, but somehow, it was terror that glued her stiffly in place. She tried lifting her hoof, and looked to see that there were actually vines tangled within the holes in the changeling’s hooves. She had called for some changeling to her side, but it would take a while for them to reach her. There wasn’t enough time to wait for them.

Celestia then grabbed Richard and tossed him at Arvin. Without the obstacle in the way, she tilted her head and then sprung at Chrysalis.

The changeling braced for impact by closing her eyes and pulling her head back. But a few moments too long passed and she didn’t feel any pain. Chrysalis slowly opened her eyes, and threw them open when she saw that Richard had speared by Celestia’s horn. He had his back to her, and Celestia’s horn was sticking out of the center of his back. The white, pearly horn was clean of blood; as if it couldn’t be tainted by anything due to how flawless it was.

She gasped; not only that she had been saved, but she also lost a changeling that she could’ve recruited to Nightmare Moon’s team. She leaped into the air, and told the changelings that were supposed to be saving her to stand down, and disperse back into the general population. Chrysalis would have to execute this plan later on, but instead, she’ll make it an all-out attack.

Richard pulled himself off of Celestia’s horn, and in its place was gushing blood. Luckily, Arvin was nearby and had his medigun. But it was just a regular medigun and nothing special. Celestia started muttering curses under her breath, and they were coming along really good.

Soon, Richard was back on his feet, but he wobbled from the major loss of blood. He leaned on Celestia’s shoulder, but pushed away by a yellow aura. He tripped, and then fell into a randomly spawned wheelchair. Richard looked behind him, and saw a changeling with a smile. He said thank you, but it was the response that completely disturbed him.

“You’re welcome my lord,” it said. “You asked for my help did you not?”

Arvin walked up next to the changeling. “No, it was me.”

“I’m sorry my lord.” The changeling bowed then placed its forelegs on the handlebars.

Celestia stared into space, still surprised at them two.

“Hey Celestia,” Arvin said, waving a hand in her face. “You’re looking a bit, spaced out. No pun intended.”

“I do not see the pun. But yes, you could say my mind has completely—“

“Blown up?” Richard interrupted. “It’s when your mind completely blanks out or you have a complete realization of something; most of the time it ends up with you saying ‘what’.”

“Yes, although it happens rarely.” She shuffled her hooves. “But this time, I’m confused about this changeling that’s with you; how is it that both of you can control it?”

“I can answer that for you,” it said. “These two are my lords, because of their mass amount of knowledge. The more knowledge you have, higher the rank you are. Our queen is the queen because, well, we don’t have anyone that would match her knowledge. But now, these two could either take over the main hive, or they can be the king. But either way, these two are both of the same equivalent commanding rank as the queen.”

Celestia was taken aback with this new knowledge. “How are those two…” she trailed off. “And why you haven’t talked until now?

“First, I would probably have a reasonable explanation. But right now, all I have is just magic. Second, you just asked. Simply asking a changeling about culture is easy, no need to be ignorant. But sometimes, some of the changelings’ unspoken laws are sometimes never shared with others—which sometimes cross with the culture—, unless we were freely to talk about it with the consent of our commanders.”

“Well, Arvin and Richard,” she looked at both of them. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Both of the mercenaries looked at each other then looked at the changeling.

“Nah,” they both spoke at the same time. Then Arvin started to push Richard to Fluttershy’s cottage.

Meanwhile, Twilight and her friends were appearing over the hill. Apparently, from Rainbow Dash’s perspective; she left the group of fighters when Chrysalis appeared, and went to grab her friends. They had started to gather the elements, but Pinkie Pie decided to bring her flamethrower, and Rarity wanted to try her cloaking device to try and snuff about enemies. Instead, they had grabbed their weapons and whatnot. But what they had noticed was that how violent they had become.

As they had reached the top of the hill, Dash suddenly put the muzzle of her scattergun on the changeling’s neck.

“Whoa!” Richard yelled. “He’s with us!”

“I’m actually a female,” the changeling spoke. “And the name is Proxy, but everypony usually calls me Roxy.” She gulped, staring down the weapon.

“Is she a spy?” Dash pushed the weapon up Roxy’s chin. “She’ll be nothing but bug juice in a few seconds if she is.”

“Ah reckon that before you start shootin’,” Applejack said. “That it would be reasonable t’ ask her if she is.”

“Fine,” Dash back away slowly, but still kept her aim on Roxy. “Tell me, what is your name and why are you here?”

Roxy facehoofed. “Just call me Proxy for now and I’m here because my lords told me to help them.”
“Who are your lords?” Dash urged.

“My lords are him,” she pointed at Arvin then to Richard. “And him. He, Arvin, told me to help him with some trouble of his. The trouble was to help him, Richard, get to safety.”

Twilight and Co. looked shocked at this news, but Rainbow Dash decided to push matters into her own hooves. “Richard! How can I ever trust you if you keep doing these things?” she screamed and pointed the scattergun toward the Bostonian.

“Hell if I know,” he moaned, still doozy from the loos of blood. “Fluttershy,” the mare beeped. “Do you think I can crash at your place, and possibly heal up there? I need some blood in me.”

Fluttershy rushed to Richard’s wheelchair and started to push him. The changeling followed, but changed into a different pony — a crystal pony mind you.

Dash sat, and pouted. She would get that Boston boy one day, but how would she do it was a whole different matter.

Meanwhile, Celestia stared at the humans, and changeling, walking away. More specifically Arvin and was interested how he could command these creatures. But she had got her answer when the German morphed into a dove and sat on Richard’s shoulder. Not that Celestia was admitting it, but she might have a crush on the fellow. Need to have a nice dinner with him, she mused, but it can wait, after beating my sister that is.

“Celestia!” Twilight’s voice broke her free of her thoughts. “Are you hurt?”

The princess chuckled. “No, of course not my little ponies. But what I do need is—,“ her stomach rumbled. “Well, I guess my body spoke for me.”

“We can take you to Sugarcube Corner,” Twilight beamed then saw her rifle strap next to her. “After we put these new weapons away.”

So my plans are working. Now all I need is somepony to make more weapons for them, and maybe a new name for the team to go on the list as well, Celestia contemplated.

As Celestia reached the gingerbread building, she secretly hoped that she would at least receive some cake. But not too much, wouldn’t need to have Ponyville all over me about this. She then looked at her flanks. Maybe it is true I’m becoming quite… What am I thinking? I’m not getting fat! Celestia then walked inside the bakery. Maybe I’ll have just a few.

Apparently, Celestia has never heard of the infamous drinking phrase of having ‘just a few’ could end up being more than what she wanted. And it has done just that.

(…..)

Tavish awoken to a fierce growl in the small tree-home; when he opened his eyes, he found a manticore staring right back at him. He slowly looked to his left and reached for his Unusual Scotsman Skullcutter that was next to the bed, but the creature rested a paw on the bed, and jumped up to it. It then stared into his eyes, and started to walk in circles.

Tavish was confused, but then figured out its entire plan when it had lain down on his legs, and slept. He then looked to his right, and saw the little zebra cuddling next to him. She had her face close to his and if she scooted a tad bit closer, he might’ve accidentally kissed her. Her legs were also holding his body close to her and he had an arm over her. It might’ve been romantic if it was a human.

Never in a million years would he have ever thought of being in this situation. But as would life would have it, it would never give him a proper moment of sense.

So that’s where he had been for the next ten hours, with a lion-bat-scorpion hybrid sleeping on his legs, and a zebra cuddling closely to him. It was until that he decided that a bathroom break might’ve been really helpful at this moment. So Tavish raised his upper body up, leaving the poor zebra trying to find another cuddle buddy. So he had placed his teddy bear next to her. Almost instantly, like when a Venus flytrap finds food, she grabbed the bear.

The Scotsman chuckled, but then remembered about the large hybrid. He poked it, and then it reacted by waving its left paw at him. Tavish shook the creature, and it had yawned.

It stretched itself by curving its back and yawned again. When the manticore opened its eyes, it had seen the Demoman. But unlike the other times it had appeared — this exact same manticore entered the house at least twenty times and counting — it didn’t leave this time. Instead, it had rubbed its head next to Tavish’s chest and purred.

The Demoman sat there, and then pushed the big cat off of his legs and got off the bed. He still didn’t believe the creature liked him, or why, but at least it didn’t act in surprise and dashed away like the usual.

After finishing his daily bathroom duties, he walked out, and saw something that nearly gave him a heart attack.

There was the zebra hugging the bear and sitting in front of the door, and was wearing a nightgown the he had given her; a maroon one-piece. Apparently, it had matched her stripes and colors, so he found it easy to have it made for her.

But it wasn’t just the clothing and the bear; it was the facial expression that she had. The zebra — Tavish suddenly remembered her name, Zecora — had somehow made her eyes the largest she ever had. Whether it was the combination of the round eyes, or the small twinkles like a puppy, or the small and innocent face; but whatever it was, it just made her adorable.

But Zecora completed the innocent figure just by speaking. “Please come back to bed, I miss you.” She quivered her lower lip and made her eyes even bigger. If she could pull it off right, this act could’ve been a decent weapon for mass destruction, and would possibly murder millions with heart attacks.

I know someone who can weaponize this. I think it’s Jacques that does it, or is it Jennifer? He looked at Zecora again. Yea, I’m saying it’s Jennifer that does it. He walked back to bed with the zebra, and feel right back to sleep. Complete with her cuddling his right side again.

(…..)

The pyromaniac was eating a cupcake. She was having a wonderful day just relaxing, with the cotton candy pony gone; she could’ve reached nirvana.

But it was suddenly interrupted when she was taking a bite out of the cupcake, and she suddenly sneezed. The result ended with her arm twitching and smashed the icing on her face.

Jennifer had a weird feeling that someone was talking about her, and in an unpleasant way.

She wiped the icing away from her face, and went out a nearby door. It had led to the outside world and all the ponies with it.

Jennifer walked out of Sugarcube Corner, and saw the large white pony from the party walking this way. The pyro forgot her name, but she knew it was something everyone said at least on an everyday basis.

She walked away in her usual outfit, towards the mammoth oak tree, better known as the library. It had contained the usual things that a library contains, including comic books apparently. She found it by going through the fiction section. It was behind the really weird human books, could’ve been called fanfiction if it hasn’t already, written by a pony named Lyra Heartstrings. Half the time, the fanfiction was something similar to ’50 Shades of Grey’. But on a human and pony basis.

Jennifer liked the creativity, but it was just that so many were published almost instantly after the Las Vegas battle; which was at least ten days ago! She sighed — she had long since reached the front door —and entered the tree. Jennifer made a straight beeline towards the new comic section. Not many ponies used to come here, but since that the comic section has been found, it has grown at least a tad bit more of popularity. But at the moment, it was empty. Not even the dragon or the pony was here.

Her fingers filed through every single comic book until she had reached the newest issue of ‘The Power Ponies’. It’s the one where Mane-iac, the villain, had been captured by the ponies, but a new villain appeared and is now helping Mane-iac escape. The villain’s name hasn’t been released yet, or his appearance which is but a shadow, but Jennifer is hoping that it’s at least an awesome name like Magneto, Kronos, or at least Harley Quinn.

Jennifer was so absorbed in the comic, that she didn’t notice Spike was reading over her shoulder. Of course, once she reached the last page — the supervillain was named Medusa, and the same traits to, but very much like Poison Ivy in a way, and now the Power Ponies have to face her in the next issue; which unfortunately wouldn’t come out until next week — Jennifer lifted her arms to stretch, but ended up hitting the dragon in the face with her forearm.

“Ouch!” Spike yelped.

“Oops, sorry dude,” she said. “Didn’t mean to do it, you were reading over my shoulder. Besides, you could’ve waited for me to finish reading this.”

“Nah,” the dragon was still rubbing his hurt nose. “I’ve already read it once it had appeared in the section. I get to read every issue just because I live here.”

“Good for you,” she gave him a thumbs up. “Now I’m going to ask why you haven’t decided to own more comic books.”

“Twilight said something about comics not being an actual book, and decided not to get any more except Power Ponies for the sake of me.” Spike crossed his arms.

Jennifer chuckled, and then walked out the door of the library. This day was starting to turn into an average day so far; calm, relaxing, and the ability to go down into disaster. Very much like a fire. This fire, by some force of nature, caused it turn into a wild forest fire.

And it had all started by a changeling with an envelope that was signed by Richard. She wanted to talk to him of course, but not now, she was just starting to like this day as a relaxing as possible!

“So be it,” She muttered, grabbing and opening the note. It had told her to visit Fluttershy’s cottage; she was hoping not visit that bunny ever again, that rabbit spooked her a bit.

The changeling stood in front still, awaiting a response from the pyromaniac. “So what’ll be? Will you go or not?”

Jennifer jumped, and then remembered about talking creatures here. “Yea, I’ll be going.”

“Alright, be ready in twenty and I’ll meet you here,” the creature left, walking in a random direction.

So what do I have to do in twenty minutes? Might as well patch up and at least dress up a tad bit more. She looked at her orange pants. Okay never mind, I’ll just add a decent shirt and maybe some jeans, how does blue, skinny jeans sound left brain? Good? Good.

Jennifer walked back towards Sugarcube Corner to get ready for anything. Most likely a smart-comment from Richard about her cross-dressing as a male; and probably make a comment about how skinny she is and how she could fit inside the old pyro suit, considering how big it was.

She put on her jeans, and wore a pink plaid shirt. She walked out to where she was meeting the changeling, and while rolling the sleeves to the elbow, the changeling reappeared and told her to follow.

This day, might’ve gone better if she had bacon and some steak to go along with it.

Secrets and Deceiving Others.

Richard ejected a disc from the computer. The disc was labeled Children of The Corn II, and it was a part of a collection of classic movies. After watching two discs of the movie series, Fluttershy’s perspective of the imagination of humans had changed greatly. In the first one, a young colt — or boy — had burned another young human. It had nearly sent her into the fear of the humans.

But, that perspective had changed for the better in the second disc; an old woman’s cat, and herself had both died. The cat was explicitly killed, but the woman was crushed by her own home. It wasn’t the death of the woman that had caused Fluttershy to burst into tears, it was the cat. She was so devastated, that she had brought in an oil burner to calm herself down. After that, she didn’t burn anything, but kept it nearby. Soon, it was the death of the human doctor, and gushing of blood from another human that had forced her to start burning something inside the burner.

The smell of the burned incense had a slight of sweet to it. It was different, but it had also caused Fluttershy to be more, happy in a sense. The incense had sent her into a fit of giggles, and had made her eyes bloodshot. But, at least the really ghastly death scenes were more, frightening; especially when the giggles and the bloodshot eyes of Fluttershy were included in the mix.

As the movie was drawing to a close, Roxy appeared but with Jennifer along with. If she had big, thick-rimmed glasses, Jennifer would’ve looked like a hipster. As Richard placed the laptop back into Arvin’s bag, he got up from the couch he was laying on, and picked up Fluttershy to place her into the bedroom. The pegasus giggled, even tried to give Richard a deep kiss, but he had quickly dodged it for it to land on his cheek. If he hadn’t dodged it, Richard might’ve gotten a tongue to taste because Fluttershy was currently trying to French kiss his cheek, for any reason why nobody knows.

Richard left the room, leaving Roxy, Arvin, and Jennifer to sort out what’s happening at the moment. A moment passed without any sound except a small rabbit constantly trying to get the pyro’s attention. Of course she had ignored the pesky rabbit, but just couldn’t help but chuckle at its futile attempts.

Arvin decided to break the silence. “So Jennifer, I have a big favor for you to do,” he said while taking off his boots. “I need for you, to try and help Richard into getting better.”

Jennifer was confused, and tried to figure out what was going on. “What do you mean?” She had expected something different, something enjoyable.

“I mean that me and Fluttershy,” Arvin then pointed towards a window, where it had shown a dark and sinister forest. “Are going to be gone for tomorrow all day; we need someone to take care of the Boston boy while we go and take care of animals and get some supplies.”

The pyromaniac gave him a thumbs-up. “So do you want me to stay here, or do you want me to go back home and rest up?”

The German sighed, and then grabbed a duffel bag where he then removed a nightgown covered with blue medical crosses. “We would want you to head home, and come back tomorrow,” Arvin yawned. “That’s the plan, ought to sleep now. See you tomorrow Jenny.”

Arvin had gone towards the doorway Richard went through. As soon as he had entered the doorway though, Richard appeared at the same time, with a wet spot on his pants.

Jennifer giggled and pointed at his pants. Richard, finally noticing the spot, looked down and blushed.

“Aw crap,” He said while grabbing a cloth to try to dry it up. “It’s not what it looks like! I just… I blame that freaking pony. It was her that did it!”

“What’d she do?” Jennifer asked while trying to hold back her laughter.

“She went and said that she wanted it, and pretended that I was a stallion.”

The pyro couldn’t hold it, and let a wave of laughter go. “Did you at least tell her to stop?”

“I tried, but she decided that sitting on my lap and hugging me was the best idea. Then after that, Fluttershy slept on me, but she was still sitting on me!” He threw his hands up in frustration and then sat down next to Jennifer. “Ugh, I forgot to ask Flutters to bring me and extra pair of clothing from Skittles.”

“Skittles?” She raised an eyebrow.

“Yea, I got to live with her,” Richard buried his face into his palms. “I never got around about what’s her problem, it’s like she was terrified about changelings, fucking xenophobe. What’d she expect; a griffon that wants to be with her? Hell no, I just want to know why she hates changelings.”

Roxy nudged Richard’s leg, almost making him jump in surprise. “I could answer that for you.”

“Why didn’t you say so?”

“Well, because I was too lazy to actually speak,” the changeling had jumped into his lap and then lain down. “Could you pet me? Please? Thank you. Now, I know at least the biggest reason why she doesn’t like us. It’s because that we had done an invasion into Canterlot — the capitol — and we had actually defeated Celestia. But, there were some bumps in the road that needed to be flattened; like the Elements of Harmony. We had to get a force of at least five-hundred changelings to get them captured. It wasn’t very fun since I was one of the people on that first wave. Nearly died, but I digress. The point is, we defeated their princess, and claimed the capitol as ours.

About a few days later — no matter how many ponies tell you that it was all in one day, was actually lying; since we had defeated Celestia, she couldn’t move the sun and therefore we had to suffer hot weather. Anyways, a few days later, a less-powerful alicorn named Cadence had escaped from her second prison, and got her fiancé, Shining Armor, to release under the Queen’s spell. So now, we have two lovers together, and apparently, the magic of their love was so powerful; we couldn’t protect ourselves from it and got launched everywhere around the country. I landed here in Ponyville, and I’m forever grateful that I was able to live peacefully,” Roxy purred against the feel of Richard’s hand running down her backside. “I’m just going to say that, she might be scared that you were probably a spy or something. I really don’t care; give me the order, and I’ll take care of her myself.”

“We need her alive,” he stopped petting. “You think you can take Jennifer wherever she needs to be? I feel like I’ve gotten hit by boxing gloves in the face. Not like that happens every day by a Heavy that has an umbrella for a hat.”

“Umm,” she paused. “Sure, I just need an explanation for the Heavy thingy.”

“You wouldn’t get it.”

“Still, an explanation would do.”

“Alright, imagine Mikhail with a tiny rainbow-colored umbrella on his head, got it?” Roxy nodded. “Good, now think of him having blue boxing gloves protecting his face like he’s ready to fight. Viola! You’ve just imagined what it looks like; now imagine getting hit by hooves fifty times in the face,” She winced. “Yea, now you know my pain somewhat.”

“You humans are weird.”

“That’s just the tip of iceberg pipsqueak,” Richard placed the changeling on the ground and softly patted her head.

Later found Richard by himself on the couch with a magazine to keep him company. Ought to read that. He picked it up and read the title; ‘Playpony’. Oh god, what have I found? I really hope it’s not what I think it is. If it is, at least it’s entertainment. On the cover, it had shown a bright yellow-orange pony with a fire-colored mane. Underneath, it had said ‘Spitfire –Has Celestia’s beauty been matched?’ Richard scoffed at the ridiculous title, and then opened the magazine. Almost instantly, he had closed it. Then opened it back to the same page, and almost drooled.

Once he had finished with reading all the articles, and staring at the pictures, a bright light had flashed into his eyes. The Bostonian looked at the source, and saw that the sun was peeking over into the small house and was just rising over a small, pointy mountain. He then looked back at the magazine, and placed it back where he had found it, and decided to sleep.

But Richard’s slumber was interrupted with snuggles from a small changeling. Roxy then buried herself into a space between Richard and the couch. He closed his eyes, and slept the morning away; until it was interrupted by Fluttershy prodding his back with her muzzle to wake him up for breakfast.

Richard sighed, the things that he does just to be himself.

(…..)

Twilight picked up another book out of the pile of magic books. Most of it was old-looking and were in some form of decay; book bindings were coming apart, pages were becoming yellow, and even an occasional spider popping up here and there between pages. It disgusted Twilight that the books were in such of a bad condition; she’ll have Spike do the honors of making newer copies of these books.

“Now Mr. Mundy,” she started. “Imagine yourself picking up that vase, and believe.”

The sniper looked at the vase which was several meters away from him. He lifted his arm in the air, and held out a hand. It looked like he was trying to do the Force; but instead, his hand glowed for a fraction of a second and the vase exploded. Nick sighed, he almost had it, but it was the wrong thing he wanted to do. He wanted to pick it up, have it land on top of Twilight’s head, and stay there.

Over the past few days, Nick had taken an interest about how Twilight was moving around things. In exchange for some lessons on trying to learn some tad bit of magic, Nick had decided to teach Twilight how to use his weapons. Twilight loved using the Sydney Sleeper, Machina, and the Huntsman. Any reasons why was probably that it had some kind of unnatural touch to them. Especially the Sydney Sleeper, oh how she loved that she could actually make her urine useful for once other than for science.

“Mr. Mundy, how about you try again?” Twilight placed another object on the small table. This time, it was a lamp, shaped like an odd and chaotic figure. With many limbs that belonged to another creature, and two different horns on its head, might as well give it a name like Soap, Fred, Steve, or even worse; Dick. Nick visibly shuddered, making the alicorn raise a brow in confusion.

“What’s the matter?”

He shook his head clear of thoughts, “It’s just that I was thinking of what in the bloody hell is that thing.”

She looked around, and then gave an expression of realization. “His name is Discord, and yes, this lamp is very similar to what he looks like.” Twilight chuckled, and then looked back at the lamp, suddenly changed to a different pose.

“How in the…” Nick trailed off.

A voice spoke to him from behind, “It’s magic Mr. Mundy. You should know that in a land of ponies, unicorns, and mythical creatures.”

He jumped, and pulled out his Bushwacka, but instead of pulling out the blade, he pulled out a long gummy worm. “You bugger! What’d you do to my kukri?” the sniper shouted.

“Oh you humans, thinking that violence is the answer,” a claw lightly trailed from his cheek, to his neck, and finally to his back. “All in reality, it just another form of chaos my friend.”

Nick took a bite from the worm, it tasted like green apple. On the second bite however, it tasted like cherries, and on the third, strawberries. “What is this?” he said.

“It’s my specialty, Gummy Discord,” The creature of similar looks appeared in front of the Australian and gave him a slip of paper. “Here’s a recipe, have fun trying to get the last ingredient,” he lowered his voice to a whisper. “It’s alicorn tears. “

A yell from behind the draconequus got his attention. “So Discord, what do you want from us ponies this time?”

Both males in the room — Spike and Jane Doe went out to patch up some problems with their rocket-jumping, with the Rocket Jumper of course — turned their head towards the lavender alicorn. Then back at each other, and laughed.

“Let the men in this room talk it out with each other,” the both said in unison.

Twilight sat down and crossed her hooves, and pouted. “Well, I need answers.”

Discord rolled his eyes, and whispered into Nick’s ear, and he giggled once the draconequus stopped. “That’s so true mate!” Nick said. “Maybe…” he whispered back towards Discord. They both giggled at the same time and then looked back at Twilight.

Meanwhile, she was busy looking for a spell for her to be able to snoop into the conversation without being noticed. After a minute of looking in the old archive books, she found it and casted it. Fortunately, she found out what they were talking about, but unfortunately, it wasn’t what she wanted to hear, and tried to turn off the spell. But there was no counter to it, so now she has to hear the many things stallions like to talk about. Most of the topic was about the princesses, her, and even some of the locals. Not only was Twilight being annoyed, she felt that she had been found out, and it seemed that the boys were just making it worse bit by bit.

But it had stopped when Spike had fallen in through the top floor window, with Jane appearing directly behind him. Both of them landed with such force, it would’ve possibly broken a few foot bones, and possibly fractured multiple ribs and both femurs. But, as would the pony world would have it; it had only caused light damage, as if they had fallen seven meters.

Discord snapped his fingers and he suddenly dressed like the soldier, and even had a Direct Hit with him. He swung towards Jane, who instinctively pulled out his shotgun, ready to pull the trigger. For a moment, both of them stood still, and finally, they both started laughing at each other.

“Private,” Jane said while patting Discord’s shoulder. “I like you; you have that spunk that reminded me of my old civilian self,” He sighed, having a small flashback of the days that he went to watch the Yanks, ate hotdogs at said games, and even got a cherry coke whenever he felt like it. Those were the days…

The soldier’s flashback was so vivid; he could actually smell a hotdog and the sound of someone opening a bottle of coke. He looked towards Discord, who was offering, and eating, both of the items. The draconequus even gave one to Spike and Nick; they both wolfed it down with glee.

Today was a great day to become friends with draconequus, especially on that is the god of chaos.

(….)

A hoof slammed unto a table in the middle of a dark room. It nearly fractured, but it held its position. A pair of cat-like eyes glowed in the darkness with anger and was fixated at a certain changeling queen.

“We thought we were told there wouldn’t be any problems on this mission,” a dark voice rumbled in the darkness, just barely out of the reach of dim, overhead light. “But please, spare me the details and get on with it.”

Chrysalis neared the table, her green eyes emitting a faint light. “We had been compromised,” she gulped. “We were nearly finished with preparing the ambush, until a certain new changeling told Princess Celestia our plans,”

“Tell us, why didn’t you exterminate this changeling?”

A bead of sweat rolled down the changeling’s face. “It wasn’t one of ours, it was,” her ears flattened against her head. “The changeling was one of Celestia’s team members.”

“What?” the voice roared. “How can you be sure?”

“I hate to tell you this, but…” Chrysalis trailed off.

“But what?”

“I think this person has found one of the artifacts, it used to be a human. His name by his friends was Richard. This artifact turns any species into a changeling with prolonged use.”

“…”

“Princess? Are you okay?”

“Leave us be, we think we have a fantastic plan for this ‘Richard’. Tell us; is he the team’s scout?”

“Yes.”

“Leave us be, you go and do this project we’ve assigned you. The technology you’ll possibly need would be with the team. From there, we believe that the task shall be easier, and more efficient, when you learn more. Talk to the engineer, he shall teach you how that magic works. And on a side note, you should look into artificial body parts; we believe that it shall help you whenever you fight on the front lines. But first, build us new armor, ours are dented and it needs replacement. I’ll get Spy here to take measurements,” The alicorn walked into the light. “Be back here in forty, I’ve got plans for our next assault.”

With that, Chrysalis walked out of the room, and into the white world of Cloudsdale. She looked around; the changelings were busy having body armor strapped onto them, with designs similar to what the Scout knows as The Covenant. Purple, blue, and even red was surrounding the creatures.

The helmets were menacing, with a small slope on the top, and a mouth opening at the front. It also had a hole on the top of the helmet, as to let the horn easily slip through. The neck was protected with a black, skin tight covering. The neck piece also had small pieces of armor, as to protect the jugular. The body frame contoured with the natural grooves and it also came with shoulder pads. The underbelly was also protected, in case anypony wanted to attack there; but it was weaker for the reason that it was less attacked since most stayed on the ground.

This armor was very strong, possibly stronger than the magical, solar gold of the royal guard. The armor of the guard was stronger that titanium, lighter than aluminum, and it was also easily malleable. It was very ideal for basic combat of a raid, but it was virtually useless against large hordes of enemies; since it was so easily malleable, it couldn’t take more than a hundred hits before it started falling apart. But, since it was strong, it was able to be used as a shield if it wasn’t joined together by weak links.

The armor of the changelings however, it was only used for the highest ranks in the army — which happened to be fifty — and therefore they were the strongest. The Scout made a joke about them being Elites, and so that was their names thereon. They were also used in special ops missions, but that was very rarely since they had no political enemies. Ever since this battle started, the number of missions that were based off ‘sudden attack and then retreat’ strategies grew somewhat. The humans called this guerilla warfare, but they were against this kind of attack. They were more open to the battle, and will not stop until they stop — or until the objective ended.

Chrysalis sighed, she really didn’t want to do anything today since this was a Monday, but as life would have it, it wasn’t fair.

She walked towards Engineer, and started to talk to him about artificial limb replacement.

“Huh,” the engineer scratched his head. “Never thought ponies were interested in this. But ah’ll have you know, it’ll be a while, and I’ll need to do some measurements. I’ll also have to do some surgery for you to become a cyborg,” He removed his glove, to reveal a robotic hand, called the Gunslinger. “Ah had gotten into an accident, so I didn’t have to have a limb cut off. But, it was replaced with this. I’ll do it, but you’ll miss the feeling of having an actual body part.”

Chrysalis’ eyes widened, she knew that it had to be a sacrifice of some sort, but not her actual body parts. “Do the jobs anyways, but instead, have the artificial parts on standby,” she leaned closer to his ear. “And if you can me teach how to make artificial parts; I’ll give you something nice later. But don’t tell Nightmare Moon.”

Engineer gave her a thumbs-up.

“Also, I need new armor for her as well. Spy would be coming around with the measurements. I’ll be here later for you to take my measurements, ok?” said Chrysalis.

Engineer nodded and went to walk towards his temporary home, The Rainbow Factory. The place had grown in productivity; removed many problems with the machines, and also removed the original construction of the rainbow itself. Many dark rumors that surrounded the factory had virtually disappeared; all but one specific rumor and it will forever haunt the escapees.

One was a specific pony that’s currently living in the city, and also is the father of an egotistical, rainbow pegasus. Nopony knows that he was an escapee, but he would rather keep it that way. Other than his daughter, that was close to joining the factory, until he told her the haunting story.

Although Rainbow Dash failed to grasp the idea of ‘don’t tell anypony about the ‘story’, she went towards Fluttershy’s home to have a comforting talk with Richard. Once she walked to the door, Dash knocks three times. When she was about to knock the fourth time, Richard appeared with an extremely large gummy bear in his mouth.

“Yesh?” He asked, grabbing the gummy bear.

“Is it okay if I could talk to you?”

“I don’t know, you were being a complete jerk the other day.” The scout folded his arms, occasionally taking a bite out of the gummy bear.

“I’m so—,“ Dash started.

“No need, it’s all cool. Come on in, I’m watching a funny movie called Step Brothers,” he moved out of the doorway, letting the pony into the house.

“So,” she began. “When do you think you’ll be able to come on back home? I miss you.. erm, your coffee I mean.”

The Bostonian didn’t notice the hesitation. He chuckled. “I’ll be able to come home right now if I wanted to, but unfortunately Jennifer is watching me since I’m ‘not well enough’ to walk out on my own. I’ll show that butter pony, I’m fine ever since day two.”

Dash busted out laughing.

“What’s so funny?” he asked.

“It’s… it’s just that… it’s just that this is your second day!” she giggled.

“I knew that,” he sat down on the couch, next to the pyromaniac, and Rainbow Dash glided and sat next to him.

“Hey Richard,” Jennifer started. “Do you think you can restart the movie? I’ve been here and there making popcorn for us, and there’s also a guest here with us now.”

He shrugged as a reply, and went to the main menu on the laptop. “I’m pretty sure we need subtitles, and more gummy bears. I’m here to watch movies and eat bears! But guess what? I’ve ran out of gummy bears!”

“Luckily Arvin left us his pocket dimension backpack.” Jennifer pulled out a back with Fluttershy’s cutie mark and pulled out a colored assortment of gummy bears. She looked at Dash, “Do you want some too?”

Dash nodded, and was handed four five-pound bears. Richard leaned back, and hit the play button. They watched as A-Punk by Vampire Weekend played throughout the beginning scenes.

The pegasus had forgotten to talk to Richard about that story.

Author's Note

Now, I'm going to say that there is going to be some swearing from here on. But of course you wouldn't mind would you?
(By the way, sorry for late update)

NEXT TIME!
What is Chrysalis really planning?
Is the factory really cleansed of the rumors?
What was the rumor that the father had escaped from and was it actually a rumor?
Are changelings really as powerful as the legitimate Elites?
Were will the next assault be?
Will Celestia make the first hit on Arvin? (Maybe not)

COMING SOON; Raise Your Weapon.

The Start of Something Something Evil.

Author's Note

Hey guys! I just recently got back into the groove of writing this story again!
Yes I know, it's been about three months that I haven't typed a single chapter.
But hey, I've also came up with some 'mini-sodes' which is like small fillers, non-canon.
So, does this sound good?
I'll leave it to you. Also, I've been thinking of alternate endings already! Does that sounds good as well?
Hehe, I should stop talking and *gets shot in the head*

Nick: "About bloody time. Let's go! Chop, chop!"

The Start of Something Something Evil.

The bright blue sky was clear, Celestia’s sun was shining with happiness, and the rainbow blur had passed by, leaving a trail.

“Yea,” Rainbow Dash’s voice echoed throughout the sky.

She sped through the clouds, with no destination in mind. The pegasus slowly turned to her left, and did a nosedive into the barely visible ground. However, once she got just meters away from hitting the ground at full force; Dash did a sharp turn back up to the skies, leaving the somewhat legendary Sonic Rainboom.

Once reaching the skies, Dash finished by doing a cone-shape corkscrew, leading to a very frantic barrel roll. She lost control, and started to fall towards the ground, but before she hit; Richard appeared, catching Dash with his open arms.

Rainbow Dash opened her eyes that she had slammed shut on her fall, and saw that Richard was smiling at her. As the pegasus leaned in to his face, Richard suddenly spoke. “Hey Dash.”

“Yes?” Dash said softly.

“It’s time to wake up.”

“No, just let me relax here for a bit,” she replied.

“No. It’s time to wake up,” His voice sounding more frantic. “Wake up!”

Dash’s eyes jarred her eyes open, to see that she was indeed very close to Richard’s face and her lips were puckered. Very quickly, Dash pushed herself away from him, her face flushed with embarrassment.
Richard stood up from the couch, where everyone was sleeping on. It was very large, and in fact, about as large as a queen-sized bed. On the other hand, it was used frequently for taking care of animals; so it had multiple — yet questionable — stains on the fabric.

Last night, Jennifer had first tried to get snuggling next to the Bostonian, but instead, the sky-blue pegasus had to get in between the two, ruining Jennifer’s chance. Of course, Richard slept on the very inside of the couch, right next to backrest almost buried within the cushions.

What woke both of the humans up was that Fluttershy and Arvin had come back from their herb collecting — which was about four basketfuls and a couple of flowers — and found them sleeping together, with Rainbow trying spoon Richard. Fluttershy squeaked, and it had woken up Jennifer from her very light sleep.

Richard walked to his trademark duffel bag, and quickly pulled out his container of Saxton Hale’s Power Coffee. Suddenly, upon pulling it out, disaster happened.

“Make me some, now!” Dash yelled. “I want my precious!”

“Nein,” Arvin reacted, trying to hold back the narcissistic pony.

“Oh, that looks delicious,” Fluttershy quietly stated.

“Give it to me!” Jennifer said, reaching for the container. “It’s the love of my life!”

Roxy said nothing, but she tried to reach for the container as well, wondering what the fuss about some coffee is. But, it seems that the changeling never had coffee once in her life.

“Everybody stop!” Richard hollered. “I know how much the container means to you guys, that’s why I am making some!”

Suddenly, everyone stopped, and looked down in shame; except for the changeling and Fluttershy of course. Arvin continued to hold Dash down, but was released once she had calmed down enough.

Over the next hour, enough coffee was made to give at least everybody two cups, if not more. Roxy had tasted the drink, but just couldn’t get the gist of it, and decided to stay with drinking this in case there were better ways to enhance flavor. Fluttershy however, loved it and let her assertiveness get the best of her and demanded more.

“Any idea on the agenda today,” Richard asked, silently eating eggs he had snuck from the chicken coop.

“I was told to meet up with Dell for something important.” Jennifer said, lifting a finger for effect. “He said that we were meeting somebody and that we ought to bring our favorite weapons or something.”

“I believe he also said that we meet at the train station,” Arvin supposed.

“I can take you there,” Dash said calmly, as if she never been this relaxed. “Also, are the ponies involved in this?”

“Hell if I know,” grinned Richard. “Maybe we’ll end up having our whole team coming along.

“And that’s exactly what y’alls princess said.” Dell spoke.

The walk to the train station was short because of how it was still six in the morning, and with no traffic, there’s no trouble at the station.

“Are you sure Princess Celestia said that?” Twilight said.

“Yup, she said ‘No ponies, I shall require assistance from only the humans. I am terribly sorry for the disappointment; I hope you can forgive me.’” Dell quoted.

“Ah wonder what the princess meant by us asking for forgiveness.” Applejack queered.

“I think that she’s planning something fishy.” Tavish scratched his chin.

“Whatever it is,” Jacques started. “We ought to leave now, before she gets mad.”

“We can’t,” said Nick. “The bloody train that was supposed to pick us up is still not here.” He looked up and down the rails. With no train in sight, it seemed like they were going to wait for a long time.

“Don’t worry,” Twilight flapped and stood next to Nick. “I’m pretty sure there’s—“

She didn’t get to finish that statement because suddenly, almost literally out of nowhere, a train appeared. It looked a lot different from the usual train; it didn’t have the usual front locomotion, just a sharp-nosed front; the cars were slender and the space between each car had disappeared; at the very end, a car similar to the front one was at the back. It looked like it had belonged to something from the future, considering the white and sleek design.

The ponies were gaping at the train, but the humans just shrugged and boarded the train. Almost immediately, a couple of high-ranking royal guards appeared and started to show the mercenaries to their seats.

The interior looked like it belonged to a luxury mansion, complete with a small bar, leg room for each person, and chairs designed to fit a human properly.

“Hello,” everyone craned their necks to find a solid blue, unicorn mare with white stripes in her mane. “I will be your train conductor, and welcome aboard the Mach 5 Friendship Express. My name is Kapellmeister; I would like to wish you a nice time on our experimental train.”

The last statement opened a couple of people’s eyes wider and started to worry if this was really that reliable. But the train has a cozy feeling, like home but a weird feeling that you are still a guest.

As everyone started to get comfortable in their own seat, train lurched forward. A couple of people jerked back, and decided it was better to get some sleep rather than suffer the believably long ride to a place.

Or at least, they thought it was going to be a long ride.

“Here’s your stop, welcome to Canterlot!” The announcer gleefully stated. “Please exit to your right and have a nice day!”

Tavish grunted, “Five more minutes mate, me still haven’t properly napped!”

The announcer walked up to him. “But the Princess shall give you a room in the castle and you’ll be able to eat all of the glorious food!”

Somehow, whichever word got him going — whether give room, or food — it had made him jump up in ecstasy, run out of the train car, and then shoot a couple of sticky bombs before him with his Scottish Resistance. Tavish ran as fast as he can past the bombs. He then jumped, and launched himself by detonating it. The Scotsman flew high and far over Canterlot, until he landed through a stained glass window to the throne room.

Celestia jumped from nearing a nap, and instantly, a unicorn guard appeared with a spear, eager to poke out the never-before seen creature.

“At ease private,” the white alicorn yawned. “He’s one of the team members of my mercenary team.”

The guard lowered the spear, but kept a close eye on Tavish as he moved back to his hidden position. Once he got back to the position however, he suddenly camouflaged into the wall color, leaving a small shadow for ones with a very keen eye.

“I was told there would be rooms,” the Demoman stated. “And food.”

“Of course there would be,” She smiled. “We’ll just have to wait for the others.”

Tavish’s face turned into a frown, and he ran out of the door. Celestia continued to sit on her throne, but was left puzzled about his departure; until she heard the Demoman yelling at his teammates. She then facehoofed, and told a nearby servant to prepare the ‘special’ rooms. The small pegasus servant nodded and left the room with a more than happy squeal.

The alicorn chuckled, and another guard appeared with the mercenaries trailing behind, awed by the mammoth, yet comfortable room.

“Welcome my humans,” Celestia mentally chuckled. “I have called you here today to talk to you on a more personal level. Please, follow me.” She got up from the throne, and started to walk towards a door behind it. It also guarded, but with only one pegasus she held two daggers below the wings, as to show that she was ready for anything.

“Excuse me Rogue, me and my team is heading in.” the alicorn spoke. “Be sure that not one entity is allowed to hear.”

The pegasus nodded and unlocked the door, but did not move out of the doorway. “But promise me this…” Rogue then leaned and whispered into Celestia’s ear. “And be sure that it happens,” she finished.

“I’ll do the best I can,” Celestia smirked. “But no promises.”

“Agreed,” Rogue moved out the doorway and let them in, but not without giving a wink to Nick.

Once Nick got into the room, he shuddered and imagined what the two could’ve talked about. But he kept it to himself and decided to take out his Strange Bushwacka for comfort.

“I’ve called you here today because,—“ Celestia started.

“We were promised sleep and food!” Tavish roared.

“I already told you, there will be soon,” She paused. “But first I want to talk about your personal lives. Since you’re going to be here for a long time, I’m proposing that each of you find yourself a suitable house in the town of Ponyville.”

The mercenaries just stared, either bored by this conversation, or just taking it in like a sponge.

“And, if possible, you must find yourself a suitable love to be with.”

It was Richard’s turn to speak, “You mean we go and try to fall in love with the ponies?” He spoke astonished.

Celestia sighed, “Yes, that is what exactly what I am proposing, now –“

“Bullshit!” Celestia jumped, startled by the outburst.

“Let me tell you something, and on the account of every human here, it’s so wrong for us to do that sort of thing!” Richard scoffed. “I’d rather throw myself in front of a train than do that!”

Jacques placed a hand on Richard’s chest. “What he means, is that we humans,” he chuckled. “Don’t do any interspecies relationships. It’s just so taboo for us.”

Celestia shook her head, understanding the situation, “But just to say, most ponies would love to be with you.”

Most of the team shook their heads. The alicorn sighed, “Very well, let’s skip that topic and possibly save it for later in case you change your minds.”

“Good riddance,” Nick muttered.

“Now,” she started. “I see that some of you are making yourself at home, and are possibly becoming friends with the ponies you’re assigned with; so let me begin with the fact that you may need to teach them how to use this technology of yours against the other team.”

“I understand that Jane Doe and a few of you have already begun to do so. So let me say that your next mission will be in approximately the next two days. I’ve already begun to have your rooms, dining, training areas, and entertainment prepared. By now, they should be done. But let me say that the reason the ponies are not with us, is because they’re going to be here tomorrow.”

“For the rest of the day, you are to be familiar to your rooms. Once that is done, ask one of the guards —the white ponies that are in gold-colored armour¬— to bring you to the throne room where you’ll be brought dinner, or lunch however you say it.”

“Any questions?” Celestia finished with a smile.

The mercenaries looked at each other; a couple shrugged their shoulders and nervously kicked the ground. Strangely, there were crumbs of something greasy scattered around some of them.

But Mikhail raised a hand, and then his minigun. “Can you make sure my Natasha is not harmed?”

The alicorn raised a brow, and chuckled. “Of course I will. In fact, I promise that no damage with come to it.”

“Of course you will, because if I see one scratch or dent,” he leaned in closer and lowered his voice to a near whisper. “I will make sure your precious white fur is stained with red and that no doctor will save you then.”

Celestia then grew a face of slight terror, and then noticed that she was actually sweating a bit. Never in her recent times that she has ever been threatened like that; better yet, she has met such a group of violent pony— no, creatures— in the last two-thousand years, since the banishment of her sister.

“Wait!” A southern voice spoke. “What time is it?”

“It’s approximately thirty minutes until noon,” She replied. “Why?”

“It only seemed like an hour ago that we had just left Ponyville.”

The princess giggled, “That’s because of you’ve had taken the experimental train. It alters time and space to make it where five hour trips seem like five minutes. I cannot fully explain how, or we would have to welcome the remainder of the team by the time we had finished.”

Meanwhile, Richard was slowly eating from a bucket of fried chicken. He was also sharing with the other teammates not talking to the pony. “Hey Dell, you want some chicken?”

Dell turned, and saw the amount of empty chicken buckets scattered around the other members not including Mikhail, himself, Jacques, and Nick— he didn’t feel hungry, in fact he needed to make another jar of jarate.

Celestia stared at the buckets, then at the scout, and back at the buckets. She licked her lips, and slowly walked towards them.

Richard looked at the alicorn, “You sure want this? I know you’re a vegetarian, but I’m pretty sure you don’t want any,” he said while waving a drumstick back and forth.

She followed the movements of the drumstick, not wanting the remove it from her sight. Richard noticed her longing stare, and decided to give it to her. Celestia grabbed it with her magic, and started to silently eat the chicken; in fact, it was quite the opposite of silent, it was as though a dog never had anything to eat in a long time.

The mercenaries jumped back away from a ferocious pony, and grabbed another piece of chicken.

By now, everyone was eating from the twentieth bucket of chicken; Celestia only having her own. The humans stared and ate at the same time. Eventually, after all the buckets were depleted, a knock on the door to the room startled everyone.

Celestia perked her ears, and then kicked the empty bucket towards the humans. She then wiped her muzzle with a nearby cloth, and finished by rinsing her mouth with some mouthwash she had magically spawned.

At the exact moment she had finished, Rogue had opened the door revealing the mass smell of fried chicken and fresh mint. “Whoa!” she sniffed the air. “Who’s cooking? It smells nice, like a fancy restaurant.”

Richard raised a chicken thigh. “You want to join?”

“By Celestia’s name, hell yea!” she trotted towards the group, forgetting that Celestia was standing next to her. “By the way,” she bit into the meat. “What is this, it tastes awesome.”

“To be honest with you,” Richard rubbed the back of his head. “It’s uhh….”

Rogue finished the piece she was on, and grabbed another. “Oh mare,” she moaned as the meat’s juices ran down the sides of her cheeks.

“The food that you’re eating now is—“

Dell placed a hand on Richard’s shoulder, interrupting him. “Don’t tell her, it’ll ruin her moment.” He whispered.

“Is what?” Rogue paused.

Richard cleared his throat, “Is delicious, isn’t it?”

“Buck yea!” she said, and continued to eat. “Say, how much did you bring with you?”

“That’s the last piece you’re eating.”

“Then you better bring more!” The pegasus then wiped her muzzle with a cloth. “Or I’ll make you bring more. In the meantime, I’ll try and find out it was made of. I can just say it that was way better than any food I’ve eaten.” Her stomach roared, and with a surprised look on her face, Rogue jetted out of the room.

Celestia watched as the pony took a left outside the throne room toward what are presumably the restrooms. Nick poked her in the neck, and asked where the said place was.

After directing him where they were, she did a quick cough and motioned that it was time to leave the room. The humans followed, but left the buckets where they were.

Once they had reached the front of her throne, Celestia spoke, “Please excuse me for those actions I had done.”

“Uh-huh,” Jacques crossed his arms. “How were we supposed to know that a meat eating horse was ruling this nation?”

“Quiet!” she hissed. “Do not talk about it too loud or the guards would start spreading rumors!”

A voice from the door had entered the conversation. “We had already known your highness, we just decided that this was too big of a secret to let loose.”

“You have got be kidding me,” Celestia facehoofed. “How long did you know?”

The earth pony guard chuckled. “Ever since you had decided that speaking your thoughts aloud after the griffons left last time was a good idea.”

“But that was three years ago!” She sighed. “Did you tell the recruits?”

“If they asked,” he replied. “Then they were only told that you liked eating pastries.”

“Unfortunately, that also somewhat the truth,” She muttered. “I only like meat more.” Celestia then turned her gaze to the humans. “Now, go and get situated with you rooms. No need to worry about dinner, unless you’re still hungry.” The mercenaries left the room, leaving the guards and the princess alone.

“Your highness,” the other guard spoke.

“Yes?”

“Should we tell Rogue what she actually ate?”

“No, if she still wants to eat it, she can.”

“Can I ask you another question, how was it when you ate meat for the first time?”

“Imagine your mouth in pure bliss, your stomach quite the opposite, and your plot hurting from the reactions in your stomach.”

“Sounds painful,” the guard stated.

A feminine pained moan emanated from the restrooms providing proof.

“Only for the first four times,” Celestia giggled.

(……….)

Nick placed his compound bow, Unusual Hitman’s Heatmaker, Strange Sidney Sleeper, Cleaner’s carbine, Razorback, Unusual Bushwacka, and Strange Tribalman’s Shiv into an ordered set on his bed— which happened to be about the size of a hummer. He hummed a popular jazz song from back home he listened a lot, and started to place his multiple cosmetic hats next to the weapons. The one he particularly loved was the original hat he had been given when he was just a youngster.

(..)

Nick was playing in his dry and patchy yard, but when a fancy car starting rolling on the dirt road, he stopped and watched as the car made its way towards his home. Dust had risen behind the moving vehicle, and eventually, the black car stopped before the front porch.

Nick watched as his dad opened the front door and walked towards the car. It wasn’t until he was a couple meters away that the driver’s side door had opened to reveal a man in his early-thirties. The man’s skin looked as red as the Australian’s sand, had muscles so large you couldn’t wrap two hands around them, a moustache so neatly trimmed; it looked perfect , and a tattoo on his right hand of Australia.

The man walked up to Nick’s father, and spoke a few words. Nick couldn’t hear the conversation, but could only read the expressions on his father’s face and the man’s. Whatever they were talking about, it was serious. Eventually, his father nodded and walked back inside the house. Nick slowly crept up next to the muscular man, and just stared at him.

The man noticed the young lad and spoke, “Oh! Aren’t you a little bugger?”

He picked up Nick and started to toss him into the sky and catching him. At first, Nick was terrified, and then noticed how fun it was. He laughed, and saw the hat on his head. Nick reached for it, and after multiple attempts, managed to grab it.

“Ah, so you fancy my hat? Well, you gonna have to fight me for it!” The man said.

He placed Nick on the ground, and raised his fists into an intimidating stance. At first, Nick felt scared, then noticed that he could finally prove who he was. So he had also raised his fists, but in a poor stance.

Nick was the first to deliver the punch, but once his fist hit the man, he instantly recoiled due to the strength of the muscles. It was like punching a brick wall.

“Ow, ow, ow!” The man yelled.

Nick looked back at the man then threw a poor punch towards the stomach, but once again it was like punching concrete.

The man yelled in pain again, but this time, he doubled over.

“Please don’t,” He begged.

Nick threw another punch towards the burly giant, this time it was towards his face. It had connected, but this time, it felt like punching a sofa cushion— soft, yet firm.

The man fell to the ground, faking an unconscious knockout. Nick then placed his foot on his back, and then did a triumphant yell. But once he finished, the man stood back up, unfazed like nothing just happened.

“Yer punches are like someone poking me; I barely feel them,” he said, brushing off the dust. “But I like your spunk kid. Here, you’ve earned it.”

The man taken off his hat, and placed it on Nick’s head.

“Thanks mate!” Nick said.

“No problem, now go inside and tell your dad that he should hurry up.” The bulky man said.

(..)

A knock on the door jolted him out of his flashback.

“Uh, one moment!” he yelled.

The marksman walked to the door and opened it, to reveal Rogue on the other side.

“Yea, you need something?” Nick asked.

“Princess Celestia is getting the others ready for something, and told me to come and get you,” she replied. “She also told me that you need some relaxing so you can take some stress off.”

“Uh,” Nick quickly noticed where this was going. “Nah, I’ve got better things to do. Tell that pony I’ll be there.”

Rogue grunted. “Fine then, hurry up.”

Nick closed the door, and then walked back to the bed. He quickly grabbed his Tribalman’s Shiv then started out of the door. But not without grabbing a jar of Jarate and a couple empty jars.

(……….)

Of course, Richard was the first one to be at the throne room before anyone else. But that also means being the one who has to wait the most. So while he was waiting, Richard decided to talk to a guard.

Apparently, this specific pony has worked for over half of his life here, and hasn’t seen any action until the past two years. There has been a mad pony who escaped prison, another who has escaped the asylum, an empire rediscovered, an invasion of changelings—Richard grew slightly worried about Roxy back in Ponyville—, a god of chaos escaped and now reformed, a purple pony with OCD becoming Celestia’s student and ascended—it took Richard a few moments after being told the description a couple of times to remember the pony—, and the return of Celestia’s current enemy; Nightmare Moon.

This, by the way, was the beginning of the action strangely.

“So you mean to tell me, the beginning of all of this, was when our client’s enemy reappeared?” Richard said.

“Exactly,” the guard, whose name was Synopsis Sentinel, replied.

Richard thought about it for a moment, and decided that this was going on number three on the top weirdest things.

He checked outside the throne room to see Rogue trotting her way towards the room in a frustrated manner. It was if someone told her she had no presents on Christmas and was given a toothbrush instead. Richard quickly backed out of her way, and took another look outside.

He saw most of the team with Nick in the very back. Everyone had at least one weapon, but Richard only brought fifteen cans of ‘Crit-o-cola’ and ‘Bonk!’ Arvin brought the Quick-fix, Mikhail brought his Natasha, Tavish brought his Loose Cannon, Jennifer brought her Backscratcher, Jacques had his Dead Ringer and a Kunai, Jane Doe had his Pain Train, Nick brought his Tribalman’s Shiv, and Engineer brought his everything.

Princess Celestia watched as her team slowly walked towards them, though she was disappointed that they haven’t put on the new suit she had heard the Element of Generosity made. What was her name? Raricow? Rawrty? Rhinestone? Rarity?

Celestia mentally shrugged, she’ll just call her Marshmallow. In fact, she wanted to eat one right now. She purred as she remembered the flavor of the sugary sweet melting in her mouth.

“Pony Princess?” Mikhail spoke, interrupting her daydream.

“Yes, Mikhail?” Celestia said— how she remembered his name and not most of the Elements was odd.

“You wanted us here because?”

“Oh yes,” the alicorn remembered. “I wanted you here because we’re going to talk a walk in the city. Get you situated with the place. Maybe go shopping!” Richard gagged. “But we’re just mainly going for an entertainment purpose. The catch is that you guys are going to be my temporary guards. But I doubt anypony here in the city would like to harm me.”

The team just shrugged, and nodded, deciding that this was an okay plan.

“Good! We’ll set off immediately!” She stood and started towards the entrance. “Oh, a quick reminder!” she turned. “Please don’t try and kill anypony that decides to touch you, they mean no harm; they’re only curious.”

(……)

Chrysalis stood on the edge on a cloud, still nervous about how she could be able to stand on something that looks so delicate from the surface to tough and concrete when standing on it. The changeling stomped on the cloud, leaving a faint grey spot. Then she peered over the edge, to show a city that she had visited one time to earn some love. The situation turned bad due to some commotion in the streets about an imposter, which happened to be the actual pony she was disguising as.

Now, she stares at the city in such glee, to be able to take it over. Chrysalis turned around, and looked into the small group of what she likes to call Zealots. They were nearly the highest rank, only one rank from commander. Ever since she regained her general power; she only wanted to take over just a single city, but it just wasn’t enough! The queen wanted more, and more!

The changeling wanted to even take over the United Districts of Grayphon. But she had once fought a griffon, and she was lucky a nearby medic changeling was nearby to heal her. Even then, it took about four changeling altogether to take one griffon down. That day was one of the days she hoped to never experience again.

But this city, so rich in culture! So rich in ponies!

So rich in love!

She just hoped it would a quick in and out, she really didn’t want to deal with this city for very long. The emblems they wore on the vets they had, it intimidated her. Especially how the emblem sits in the middle of a big red star! It made her uneasy, she wanted it gone as soon as she gets the chance.

This city must be conquered as quickly as possible.

Stalliongrad will be hers!

(……)

A purple aura surrounded the Festive Huntsman. Twilight has seen a few of these weapons at the Equestrian Games, but now that she has her own set, she’ll now learn how to use it. Even better, she has the power to levitate the weapon, making it easier to hold.

Twilight raised the bow, and slowly placed an arrow in the notch. Drawing the arrow back, she aimed at the target she has chosen; the apple on top of Spike’s head.

“I, uhh,” Spike nervously said. “I hate to say this, but I don’t think this is a great idea.” He backed up to the edge of the tree.

“Don’t be silly, now hold still and be quiet!” Twilight commanded. “I’ve got to concentrate…”

She drew the arrow even farther back; to the point she couldn’t even get a strong hold. In an instant, Twilight removed her hold and released the arrow. With a thunk, the arrow landed next to the drake’s head, barely missing his right ear.

“Drat! I missed,” Twilight drew another arrow. “Now be a good dragon and hold still.”

Spike was trying to hold still, but with the last arrow landing next to his right, his breathing became more frantic. If she was to make another shot like that, Spike believed that he could get a heart attack, or even worse, become a zombie!

He held his breath once Twilight pulled the arrow again. With another thunk, and a quick crunch, the arrow planted itself into the tree. Spike let out his breath, and saw small pieces of apple scattered on the ground.

Twilight walked up to the tree and pulled the two arrows out of the tree and replaced them back into her holster. Spike was frozen in spot then fallen over with a comical faceplant.

Twilight then walked into the treehouse, and placed the bow in a homemade weapon rack next to the door. One side was Spike’s and the other was hers, each organized into Primary, Secondary, and Melee weapons. Then, they were organized into an alphabetical order, and so on so forth. Spike thought it was just so tiresome just to do this organization, but Twilight was delighted with her idea of it and decided that it was perfect.

The purple alicorn then walked into her kitchen and grabbed herself a bottle of ‘Fizz Grape Flavored’. She stared at the drink, and then opened the refrigerator to see if she needed to buy more food. Twilight looked at her schedule, and saw that instead of not having enough time to go to the market; she needed to get be ready to leave tomorrow for Canterlot.

She sighed, while at the same time, wondered why the princess didn’t want the other half of her team to be there with her. Twilight opened the door, and found Spike still lying down on the ground with his face in the ground. She lifted him up with her magic, and placed him on her back.

“I wonder what they’re doing right now,” she muttered. “I bet the humans are having the time of their life.”

Twilight turned around and decided that now would be a great time to start polishing, and get the weapons ready for transport.

(…….)

Richard opened another can of “Bonk!” and took a sip. This has been the tenth out of the fifteen cans of “Bonk!” that he has burned through, and yet he is not stopping.

The day so far had been great for him, but once the team and Celestia had stopped at a massaging salon, it went downhill from there. It had started when it was his time for a quick massage. Richard had first lain down on the table, expecting a casual fifteen minute back rub. What he didn’t expect was that the back rub turned into a belly rub. The mare that was massaging him, wanted specifically a belly rub from him, and nothing more.

Eventually, his time was up, but the mare wanted to be petted. Richard stood, and tried to leave the affectionate mare. But to his luck, the door was locked shut. The scout turned around, and to his horror, the mare was perched up in a position like she wanted to be drawn like a French girl; on her side with her head propped with a hoof.

Richard backed into a corner, but he was saved by someone unlocking the door and letting him have his chance. He escaped, and decided to sit right next Mikhail; where he was able to be hidden from view, and for a quick getaway, he could always run in circles around the heavy.

The next event was when the team went a clothing store. At first, Richard was bored out of his wits and didn’t want to deal with anything. Until he walked into the store, and saw the designs of some of the stallion’s apparel. Some were designed to make to person look like a 70’s greaser or jock. Even better, there was a sign that said clothing able to be made to order.

Scout walked to the nearest designer, whose name happened to be Hoity Toity, and asked to see if he could blue hoodie. At first, the stallion unsure, then noticed Celestia coming by and telling him that she’ll pay for it.

Eventually, after about five minutes of measuring, Hoity reappeared with the hood perfectly matching Richard’s body. But the unfortunate thing, it has Celestia’s and Dash’s cutie mark on his left shoulder.

Richard frowned about the marks, then asked the pony about it.

“Sorry, I was told that it was part of the order. I cannot revise it, but I can say that it was Celestia’s idea about the Cuties marks.” He replied. “I can make a separate one, with the exact way you wanted it, but it’s coming out of your pocket.”

“Fine,” Richard reached for his sack of bits. “How much?”

“It’ll be about fifty bits.”

“Deal!” He gave the pony his bag of bits. “Now how it’ll take?”

Hoity was silently counting the bits, “About as long as last time, also, you need about five more bits to pay for your order.”

“One moment,” Richard replied. He walked towards Celestia and then asked for five bits.

After paying for the bill and waiting for the other new hood. Scout threw it on, and looked at himself in a body mirror. I look good! Maybe I should try and get a hat. He thought. I should probably get new shoes, but that can wait until I get back at that one white pony’s place.

Eventually, the humans and the alicorn left the store only to find a throng of ponies waiting to see the mercenaries. Most were holding up small posters, a couple holding very large pictures, and many of them holding small plushie dolls of the team.

How the fandom reached this point was a mystery, but now they were famous and the crowd wanted some autographs. Slowly, the team signed more items and artifacts. A couple objects shouldn’t have even been shown to the general public, but it was there.

After Richard finished signing a small pegasus look-alike plushie, a pony decided to grab him and tried to kiss him. He tried to push himself away, but the earth pony was just too strong for him. The scout then decided to finish drinking his can of “Bonk!” and escaped the pony’s grasp.

And this brings us back at the present where Richard is just finishing his eleventh can.

Celestia noticed his frantic drinking, “Hey, no need to worry any more. Besides, don’t you need to use the stallion’s room?

His eyes opened in surprise, and he ran into the nearest shop. The team watched as the scout disappeared into the store, and decided to take a look. The sign above them said ‘The Wonders of Equestria’.

Once they had walked into the store however, the team saw a gelatin blob of what resembles a creature of some sort, sitting behind the store counter.

“Hello,” was his reply. His voice was impossibly deep, as though he was a person sent through a voice changer. “My name is Qwerty Uiop from the 2364th Dimension; I sell items here that were once found in the Everfree Forest, and artifacts from long ago.”

Princess Celestia looked at random shelf and saw that there was a sword that glowed white. On it, had the words inscribed “And may you live on, avast trala my good friend.” She stared at the sword, her mouth wide open. “Where did you find this weapon?”

“It was found next to a really large pony statue covered in snakes when a couple of miners found what looked like an underground civilization,” He said. “There were also multiple other statues with the same look, as though they were golems waiting for activation.”

“What about this wooden cane?” Jacques asked, holding up a short wooden rod.

Qwerty let a breath of delight, “That my good friend is a magic staff created by the unicorns, for unicorns that had a broken, or born without, a horn.”

Mikhail pulled out a large white and light blue minigun. “I like this gun! What is it?”

“That,” the gelatin let out a deep chuckle. “is a weapon that fires small shards of ice ten percent faster than the speed of an average minigun. The weapon also takes less time to speed up and the ammo is only water. But the downside is that the accuracy is extremely bad and if you’re shooting it for a long period of time, the strength of the bullets becomes weaker due to overheating. Eventually it turns into a harmless water gun if you don’t let it cool down for about ten seconds.”

“I’ll take it!” The heavy said eagerly. “How much for weapon?”

“It’ll be ninety bits.” Qwerty replied.

Celestia walked up to the gelatin creature. “I’ll pay for whatever they buy here.” She placed a sack of bits onto the counter.

“Ok then,” Qwerty grabbed the bits. “Now will anyone else willing to get anything?”

Richard placed a small purple object onto the table. “I’ll take this thing!”

Jennifer also placed a large cannon-like weapon on the counter; Arvin grabbed a small dove that can talk; Jacques had a small glowing dagger; Tavish had grabbed the sword and a shield that had a griffon on it; Dell had a mini-sentry similar to his old one, but it levitated in one spot; Nick grabbed a rifle but it had unusual scribes written on the side; Jane Doe had a small bottle of Coke, and a package of “Instant Cheeseburger, just open bag over and over!”

“Hey Solly,” Richard asked. “Why didn’t you grab any of those ‘Holy Hand Grenades’?”

Qwerty spoke up, “I believe I can answer for him. The bag of ‘Instant Cheeseburger’ always spawns a burger; and that bottle of Coke is never ending.”

“Eeyup!” Jane replied.

The gelatin looked at the items, “So let’s see, it’ll be an Ice Minigun, a Plasma Pistol, an Ignition Cannon, a Chitchat Dove, a Dragonbone Dagger, the Gik-Yar and an Authority shield, a Forerunner Mini-Sentry, and the Folan’dis; a weapon that shoots a beam of pure hard sound.” He counted up the amount of bits, and compared it with the amount Celestia gave him.

“The weapons are paid for, but the only problem is that you only need about six more bits,” Qwerty gazed at the alicorn princess. “but since you’re buying virtually all of the weapons, I’ll give you twenty bits back.”

“Thank you,” Celestia said, placing the bits into a secret spot on her chestplate, behind the gem. “I’ll be sure to visit this store once again soon.”

“Thank you,” he replied. “And be sure to tell your friends about this place, I have many items, and there is many more to be found around this country!”

The team left the store, with their goods in their arms as though they had just gotten a new toy.

Celestia turned to face the group, “Now, we must rest up—a big day tomorrow and your mission the day afterwards. So be prepared to take on anything.”

(……..)

Jacques opened the door to his room and stared into the darkness before turning the light on. He walked towards the vanity he had, and saw that the weapons he had placed were still there, untouched. The spy placed his new weapon, and the ones he carried, on the counter.

But before he placed down the Kunai, Jacques quickly turned around and pointed that dagger right in front of an unsuspecting changeling that was about to backstab him.

Jacques cloaked, leaving the now confused creature to wonder where he went. Then, in a flash, the changeling was tied around the legs and couldn’t escape. The Zealot struggled, and even made a vain attempt to cry for his teammates that he had failed, but was quickly knocked unconscious by a quick hit on the head.

Jacques already de-cloaked and now stared at the creature, studying it. He walked to his door, and checked if there were any more changelings. With the hallways empty, the spy walked next door to Nick.

Once reaching his bedroom door however, green blood covered the ground in front of it and the door was ajar. Jacques lightly pushed open the door. Once the door opened fully, in the middle of the room was the sniper holding a Bushwacka and standing over a dead changeling.

Nick turned his head at the door, and saw Jacques looking at him in amazement. Nick lunged towards the Frenchman, and Jacques’ face suddenly turned alarmed. Jacques rolled to his right, out of Nick’s sight.

“Whoa there comrade!” he yelled. “I’m not a changeling!”

“Like hell you are you bloody wanker!” Nick swung his blade out into the hallway. “If you’re a human, then let me see what color is your blood!”

Jacques pulled off his mask and backed away from Nick’s door as the sniper walked out. “It’s me!” He pulled out his kunai and made an incision on his face, light enough to not leave a scar.

Nick paused, and watched as the fresh blood went down the spy’s face. He lowered his weapon, “I’m sorry mate,” He replied, and in turn, Nick made a cut on his hand and it drew red.

“Well, I guess we both say we’re good,” Jacques said. “We ought to check on the others.”

“Agreed.”

(.)

Eventually, everyone was checked for and was okay. There was a problem whenever it came it Richard and Arvin, but they had proved they were themselves by telling a story only the team knew. For example, Arvin lost Archimedes inside Richard; and Richard drank all of Spike’s OJ and that made him pissed.

“Well, we got done,” Jacques concluded. “I hope that there was no trap or—“

He never got to finish the sentence because a group of Royal Guards came rushing towards the group standing in the hallway. “I’ve got an important order from Princess Celestia!” He said.

“What?” Nick replied. “Well, we need some clues here!”

“Oh yes, sorry,” he said. “The ponies have arrived at the palace, but we must head to Stalliongrad immediately. Sorry for the late notice, but you are pack up your items and be ready at the front of the palace in thirty!”

“Alright,” Nick commanded. “Let’s move it! Chop, chop!”

(…..)

Later, the mercenary group gathered in front of the palace. They had already packed everything in less than seven minutes, and now had thirteen minutes to burn. Most of the group was playing poker, with Jacques being the dealer and some of their hats being the bets.

No-one noticed, but the ponies were slowly making their way towards the palace. A uniformed German Shepard nearby Richard barked at the group. They looked, and saw that Twilight led them.

Eventually, they finally reached the front doors and started greet the humans. A few replied, but most of them were too involved into the poker game, that they didn’t even care.

“I fold,” Tavish said.

Mikhail slapped his hand of cards on top of the makeshift table—with consisted of a construct three sentry— and yelled, “I win this game!” What was revealed was a royal flush.

The other people that were playing groaned in agony because they lost. The ponies watched the game come to a close, and were going to ask until Big Mac spoke.

“Ah believe the Princess is here to talk.”

Everyone looked up, and saw her looming over the group.

“I believe it’s time you head to Stalliongrad,” Celestia said. “And I hope that we shall not lose this city! Stalliongrad supplies our guards with weapons and armour, and if that fails, we’re practically defenseless!”

“Totally no pressure,” Dash muttered.

“We got it!” Richard yelled.

Celestia chuckled, “Well my little ponies, today is your chance to prove how good you are with your weapons. Guards! Escort them to the train; have them take the regular train, not the Mach 5.”

The team started to follow the guards.

Once they were out of earshot, Celestia sighed, “May my mother protect them, and I pray that my sister isn’t being a complete douche for the next several days.”

The Battle of Stalliongrad --Day One; The Gryphon Brothel

Fluttershy rolled over in her bed, stared out of the window, and watched as the rolling hills of Equestria went by. She wondered why she had to fight the other ponies. It felt wrong to do it, but Fluttershy knew that she had to do it for the sake of Equestria! But, what if the other team laughed at her for being such a wimpling? Why couldn’t she have stayed home and be like her usual self at least once? All she wanted was to be by herself for at least a day; in her living room, relaxing on the couch, and eating some candy.
The pegasus softly whimpered about how to fight. Was she supposed to use the medigun against them? Or was it the bonesaw? How do you properly reload the syringe gun?

Fluttershy dug herself deeper into her silky sheets, leaving only her face visible, and whimpered even more slightly louder. She had forgotten how to work the medigun; she even forgotten who she was working with!

The yellow pegasus panicked; starting with a soft wheeze, eventually hyperventilating even faster, to the point where she could barely breath properly.

Fluttershy jumped from her bed, and collided with the ground. She yelped, and threshed to get back up. But her legs failed to do their proper function. The pegasus panicked ever more, and went to the bed underneath hers, where Arvin slept.

Fluttershy violently shook the sleeping German. His response was a sleepy moan.

“Go back to bed Fluttershy,” he mumbled. “I’m sure that nobody is attacking us.”

Fluttershy gave a look of disapproval, and decided to jump unto his bed. Arvin grunted, and scooted closer to the wall, leaving the pony some room so she can snuggle in.

The pegasus grinned. She liked Arvin; if anything, he could be mistaken for a father better than her last one. She frowned, shook her head of the thoughts, and laid her head to rest.

For the rest of the night, she dreamed of having an actual proper veterinarian degree.

Meanwhile, in another car on the train, two ponies where having a secret conversation about their companions.

“Ah tried everything Dash,” Applejack said.

“Are you sure?” the sky-blue pegasus replied. “Did you try the, um, the thingy?”

“What are you talking ‘bout?”

“I mean, um, like dressing yourself up?”

Applejack raised an eyebrow, “Please don’t tell me what ah think you’re telling me.”

Dash snickered. “You mean haven’t done it yet?”

Applejack blushed. “No, and ah’ll probably never will; next advice.”

Dash put a hoof on her chin, and thought for a second. “Have you tried telling him straight up?”

While this conversation continued, Richard quietly woke up but didn’t make a single movement so that he could hear without disturbing them.

“Dash,” Applejack sighed. “Let’s face it, my partner probably doesn’t even know about it.”

“At least my partner tells all about how he loves me,” Dash lied. “Oh yea, it’s like we could get married tomorrow.”

“I know you’re lying. Richard really doesn’t like you, does he?”

“Now you’re lying!” She replied. “I’ll prove it to you,”

“Dash,” Applejack said. “Just admit that he doesn’t like you. I know how he treats you, more like a sister that he likes to compete with, but only as friend.”

Dash sighed. “Yea, I guess I was over exaggerating. He does treat me more like a friend, but not like a bestie or anything. If anything you guys are like—“

“Why don’t you two just kiss already?” Richard yelled, getting a giggle from Tavish, Dell, Big Macintosh, Nick, and even Zecora, in the same car. “This sappy stuff is getting on my nerves.”

“You know little sister,” Big Mac spoke, has been a lot more open with himself since he started to talk more with Mikhail and has become a lot more talkative in general as a result. “You do know that you two are the loudest ponies that I’ve ever known? It’s like somepony’s holding a megaphone when both of you are together.”

Applejack blushed. “Ah’m sorry, ah’ll just head to bed now.” She slowly climbed up the small ladder leading to her twin-sized bed.

But before she got on the bed, Dell grabbed her by the foreleg and mouthed ‘We’ll talk later’.

The earth pony’s face grew redder than her own cutie mark. “Ok” was her reply.

Rainbow Dash glided to Richard’s bed and jumped on top.

“Ugh!” He recoiled. “Now I have to sleep with a pony who hasn’t taken a bath for at least week!”

“Not true!” she countered. “I took a shower yesterday!” Dash lifted her left foreleg and sniffed her chest.

“Fine, you can sleep here,” the scout said. “And taking a bath with no soap doesn’t count!”

“Yes it does!” She stuck her bottom lip out and nestled into the sheets.

(…….)

The train came to a screeching halt, literally.

It had awakened everybody on it, and the humans suddenly grabbed a weapon that was hidden underneath their pillow and pulled it out. Dash was surprised at the fact Richard pulled out his Sun-on-a-Stick. She had never seen it before, and wanted to use it.

The conductor walked into the first car of the short train, and was greeted with a knife poking his pack.

“It’s me,” he uttered. “I was just here to pass on the information that we’re at the closest we can be to Stalliongrad.”

“Is he right?” Jacques yelled to Jennifer.

“Yep, appears so. But it looks like we’re at the city’s outer limits. If you want to make camp here, I suggest this is the best spot to do so. If not, then we’re going to have to hoof it a little.”

“Just how far are we from the city?”

Jennifer squinted, and then guessed. “About three hours walk from here.”

Jacques pulled his Your Eternal Reward from the pony’s back, who let out a sigh of relief and headed straight towards the second car. He closed the door behind him, and slid open the entrance to the middle car.

Once again, he was greeted with a weapon, but instead, the level three sentry construct Dell made had discharged a couple of bullets. All of it missed, but the accuracy was enough to scare the unfortunate pony.

“Like I said to the other car, we are as close as we can to the city of Stalliongrad.” He yelled, and walked straight towards the last car. The conductor was nearly having a nervous breakdown. He has started to think these humans are really insane, not like how the radio projects them.

“I would advise against heading towards the last car mate,” Nick said. “Some of the ones in the last car could be more dangerous than us. I’ll go tell them instead.”

The conductor stopped, and turned to see the Australian softly shoving him to the side and opening the door to the other car. But before he opened the entrance, Nick had moved to the side of the door, just before a shotgun discharged in the direction.

“Come out Merasmus! I know you’re on the other side of the door!” Soldier yelled.

“It’s me mate!” Nick replied. “Just here to tell you that we had stopped here because we couldn’t get any bloody closer!”

“I ain’t falling for your tricks Merasmus!”

“Nein,” Arvin yelled. “Merasmus isn’t here. He’s somewhere else.”

The soldier loaded another shell into his shotgun, “Keep your eyes peeled then,” He cocked the gun and strolled into the car.

“Now, I want to know who is serving bacon, eggs and toast today?” Jane demanded in the car.

“After we get off this train, we’ll eat,” Jennifer entered in the opposite side of the car. “And we also have a couple of volunteers to help us. The ones doing cooking duty for the next week is,” she pulled out a sheet of paper. “Applejack, me, and Nick; Nick will go to the market or hunt, either way he’s getting us the food. He’s also preparing the meats. I will start the fires as usual. And Applejack will help cook and prepare the non-meats.”

“Yea, yea we get it,” Richard said. “But can we hurry up? I need to make a pot of coffee.”

Everyone in car agreed and headed for the nearest entrance to exit out of the train.

Once everyone had moved their luggage and weapons out of the train, the locomotive had disconnected from the rest of the train, and started to leave.

“I’ll be back in about a week,” the conductor yelled out of his cockpit. “Hope you have fun! And be sure to tell the changelings I said die!”

The locomotive slowly faded in the general direction towards to the city.

“Wait!” the scout said. “If he went in that direction, then couldn’t he have just dropped us closer?”

Everyone stared at him, then back towards where the locomotive disappeared. A rampage moment happened right after they noticed the situation.

“What the buck?”

“Useless wanker!”

“Damn you!”

“Boys, we have a traitor!”

“Well, he was no fun.”

“Ah hope he’s bucking happy about himself,” Applejack finished.

“And I bet…”Big Mac trailed off. He saw that the locomotive was coming back, but it looked different than the last time.

Eventually, the locomotive slowed to a stop about twenty metres away from them. Rainbow Dash flew towards the now flaming engine. She gasped, and then looked away. The rest of the team finally reached it and saw what Dash had seen; the charred conductor missing some of his limbs. The locomotive also fared no better; the back had explosion damages, along with bullet marks on the side, green blood scattered at the very front, and a cleaver lodged right next to where the conductor’s head would be. There was also an Australiam golden knife lodged into the back of the conductor.

Jacques picked up a perfectly clean piece of paper next to the body, and read aloud;

Dear Solar team,
Here I bring you your conductor. We know he planned to turn around and head back towards your direction, so I had decided to help him out. Please do know that we’re challenging you to come and bring your best. The area we’re fighting in is very similar to what we’ve called Viaduct. There will be other places to fight, but this is the main choke point. Also, remember that we’re not total barbarians, so we’ve some rooms you can use at The Gryphon, a brothel still in operation, even while we fight now. Meals are provided, and as long one of you gets a session with all twenty of the tramps, your rooms are completely paid.

As written by; Blu Spy aka François Jacob.

Jacques crumpled the sheet of paper, and threw it next to Jennifer—who burned it to nothing but ashes.

“Well comrades,” He started. “It seems like we have a place to sleep tonight. One question, who is going to take it for the team?”

“Take what?” Rainbow Dash replied.

“Take all of those tramps for a ‘session’,” he quoted.

Everyone looked at each other, and then the humans placed a finger on their noses almost instantly. Pinkie also placed a hoof on her nose, but she didn’t know exactly why.

“Alright,” Jacques yelled. “Let’s be mature and not do Nose-Goes, instead, let’s Draw-Straws.”

“Aww!” Richard moaned. “I always end up getting the shortest one!”

“This time I’m having the rule as the longest one. Now I just need some sticks.”

Ten minutes passed, and while Pinkie somehow conjured eighteen sticks, Jacques had organized them.

“Alright, pick your sticks!” The spy announced.

Eventually, everybody had picked their fates and most saw that they haven’t received the largest one; Except for one unfortunate equine.

“Why am I the one that has to do it?” Twilight said.

“Because you joined in the game, so you get the prize!” Pinkie giggled. “And it might be fun! I bet the session is filled with more games and possibly drinks!” Her smile grew at every idea.

Twilight sighed, and felt Nick’s hand on her shoulder. “I guess this is the moment you’re going to tell me some really great advice?” She said.

Nick scoffed, “You thought I was going to do that? I was just going to say ‘good luck and have a bloody good time mate’ but I guess I can just settle with a ‘hi’ then.”

She shook her head. “And here I thought you were going to be a really great friend.”

“More like your acquaintance. But I guess friend is also a great idea.”

“Also, I ran out of jars for Jarate last night, do you have any empty ones?” the lavender alicorn asked.

“’ere, I brought some just for that exact reason,” Nick reached into his camper pack and pulled out seven jars. “There’s some extra just in case.”

“Thank you.”

Richard walked up next to the sniper couple, “Hey, could you two can it? We’re moving! Let’s go, go, go!”

Richard smiled, and started after the scout with Twilight trailing not too far behind.

(…..)

As the city grew closer, the more that it seemed to loom and tower over the team. Burned flags, destroyed buildings, and small black hives were built on the buildings. A changeling here and there were so engrossed in their duties, that they haven’t noticed the appearing group and some nearly crashed into them a few times, leaving with a quick sorry.

A Zealot changeling noticed them however, and had quickly called over a few grunts to help him. The humans pulled out a few guns, but the most of the ponies cowered behind the tall humans.

“What are you doing here?” The Zealot hissed.

Richard stepped up. “We’re here to kick ass and eat breakfast! But I don’t see any breakfast!”

The Zealot grunted, and motioned for the lesser changelings to leave. “Very well, I see that you’re The Solar team. I’ll escort you to the brothel, but just to say, I am not protecting you whenever the other changelings try and attack.”

Dash puffed her chest. “Let them come! I’ll make sure nothing is left of them!”

“Yea,” Richard said. “Let them try and come, she’ll knock ‘em out with only her smell!”

“Oh yea? Then why aren’t you knocked out?”

“Have you noticed why I haven’t been breathing?” Richard gasped.

“Why I outta—“ She raised a hoof, ready to make a swing.

“Why don’t you two just kiss already?” The changeling spoke. “The feeling of emotion between you two is making me full. And I think a couple of nearby changelings also want a snack as well.”

They looked, and for sure, there were a few changelings feeding off of their emotion. They could tell because pink auras — similar to the look of a medigun heal— had the source from them and it was pretty large.

“And I sense other feelings as well,” He sneered. “Jealousy, lust, envy, anger, happiness, love—brotherly, fatherly, and regular—, friendship, and what seems to come from the humans; the hunger for blood and fighting.”

“Damn right I’m hungry you bastard!” Jane yelled. “Give me some bacon or I’ll make some from your dead flesh!”

The Zealot looked at him curiously, and then started to walk in a random direction. “Follow me,” he said.

The team shrugged, and walked wherever the changeling was leading them to. Eventually, the team came upon a two-story building, with neon lights flashing to show a pink griffon in a pose. The area it was suited in seemed to look like where the clubs would be. It was still in good condition compared to the city, but a few ponies and griffons were still wandering around even after the invasion —and evacuation— happened.

“Please mister,” a small colt spoke. “I’m hungry, can you help me?”

The team walked past the young pony, but Pinkie decided to hand him a loaf of bread. “Here,” she said. “I hope this makes you happy.”

The young colt smiled. “Thank you and Celestia bless your soul.”

The Zealot stopped in front of the brothel, “And here is where I’ll drop you off. Now, the Red team—or what we call the Lunar team—are planning to have a talk with you about things. They said something about having a battle strategy once you appear.”

Arvin whispered into Dell’s ear, “They’re going to talk with us about control points. This discussion with not be good overall.”

“Ah agree,” he replied. “But first, let’s at least eat some brunch—it’s about noon.”

“Now, time for you to get situated, I’ll be waiting here in about three hours to escort you to Lunar Team.” The Zealot left, leaving most of them to wonder why they would want meet up with the other team.

Richard was the first one to enter the building and was greeted with a griffon wearing a kimono.

“Hello sir,” she said. “Welcome to The Gryphon, do you want me to show you the girls?”

“No, I’m just here because I’m part of the Solar team,” He replied while grabbing The Winger from his pocket.

“Oh, I see,” she said distastefully. “We got our mercenaries here!” she yelled to the back. “And get the rooms ready! I don’t want anybody walking into the special rooms assuming that it’s the room they’re staying in!”

“Yes headmistress!” A griffon in a French maid outfit yelled.

By now, the whole teams had filed into the medium lobby, and were waiting to get their rooms. Twilight in the meantime, was mentally preparing herself for the worst.

“Hey Jacques,” Richard spoke. “Think that maid one would be the best for you?”

The Frenchman frowned, “That was funny,” he said sarcastically. “But do you think that rainbow one would be perfect for your so-called ‘problem’?”

Richard muttered something, but left it at that.

“That’s what I thought,” Jacques said.

The headmistress came back, “So I’ve gotten some rooms for you, about nine overall, and they’re on the top floor. Only have one bed per each room unfortunately so some of you would have to double up. If I am correct, there are eighteen of you, right?” Arvin nodded. “Great! Then that mean two a room. Now to business, who will be the one to take a session? This will pay for all your rooms, but not meals.”

The unfortunate pony walked up to the front of the group, “I will be the volunteer,” Twilight said.

“Good!” the griffon ecstatically said. “You’re an alicorn? Well, this is going to be interesting. But as many would say; there’s a first for everything. This is your first right?”

Twilight blushed. “Yes,” she squeaked.

“Oh don’t worry, we wouldn’t hurt too badly,” she smiled. “Now follow me, and you’ll begin your session. You also get to pick your first one!”

Twilight looked at the score of griffons standing in front of her. She gasped, and recognized one of them, and so did Rainbow Dash and the rest of the Mane Six.

“Gilda?” they yelled simultaneously.

“Yea chumps?” She replied. “You’re picking me right?”

“What happened to you?” Dash asked. “I didn’t think you would be here!”

“Well, I’m just earning money so that I can head back to Grayphon,” Gilda said. “Besides, I’ve only been working here for about ten days, and not a single client decided to pick me. So don’t judge just yet! Maybe I’m just too cool for them,” she joked.

Twilight coughed, “I guess there is a first for everything,” she muttered.

“So you are picking me,” Gilda cooed. “Well then, follow me.” She turned around and headed towards a random door. “Oh! I forgot to mention purple pony, that you might need to prepare for the worst, lasting all twenty of us is almost like the thingy you call the Iron Pony, only more, cardio I should say.”

Twilight gulped, and entered the room, with Gilda closing the door behind her. “I should say it would take, at least an hour.”

“Have a jolly good time mate!” Tavish yelled, raising a bottle of Scottish rum.

The door closed, and the headmistress motioned for the humans to follow her. She opened another door, and it led to a long wooden hallway with stairs leading the next floor at the very end. The eight doors on each side all had a sign, a couple doors had said occupied while the rest said empty. The hallway smelled heavily of pine, the Polo Ralph Lauren trademark scent, and a distinct odor that’s so weak, you might not even think it’s real, but you can still smell it.

Mikhail took in a deep breath, and let out a sigh. “Reminds me of home, I miss Russia…” he trailed off.

With that being said, the humans also started to feel homesick, each remembering a smell of home. Whether it was the Polo scent, pine, or the faint odor; it make them realize that they might never get home. Some of the humans sat down next to the wall and shed a few tears before the curious ponies. The meltdown touched the ponies, and had made a few futile attempts to get them up and walking again.

The headmistress looked back, and saw the weeping humans. She never saw such a scene in her brothel. Then, she instantly remembered an enchanted candle nearby and blew it out.

Slowly, the distinct odor faded away and the mercenaries were slowly getting themselves together. Richard and Jennifer were still crying softly, and hugging each other for comfort because they both were very emotionally attached to home; unwilling to leave their childhood for the sake if it suddenly disappearing from their grasp.

Dash watched, and felt a pang of jealousy, but couldn’t understand why they couldn’t just deal with it? They’ve been doing that for the past couple of months, have they? She checked the couple again, they slowed to nothing but soft whimpers.

“Oh cut it you two,” Dash said after a few moments. Everyone was ok and was now wiping the loose tears away from their eyes.

The two stopped, and saw everyone else had stopped. Richard jumped from Jennifer’s arms and coughed. “I was um,” He stuttered. “I was just making sure she was okay.”

The pyromaniac crossed her arms; she liked that cuddle and was demanding more with the look in her eyes.

“Of course you were mate,” Tavish said. “I can tell by those tears running down your face. What’d you do? See a Rainbow… Oh wait.”

Dash facehoofed, “Oh wait my flank!” She snatched the bottle of rum from his hands and chugged the rest of the bottle.

Richard just watched, and started to head up the flight of stairs. He stopped where the headmistress was standing. “Do you have any breakfast or any food? I’m pretty hungry.”

“We only have meats,” she replied. “I’m pretty sure the ponies can’t eat it, but I don’t about you humans. You’re going to have to pay for them though.”

“We’re omnivore,” Jacques said from behind the scout. “If you any bacon, eggs, and toast we’ll do fine. Also, we were told meals are provided, we had gotten a letter from the Lunar team saying so.”

“Ok,” the griffon said. “We have bacon and eggs, but no toast. We ran out of bread a couple days ago and aren’t getting any until the day after tomorrow. And the Lunar team sent you? Well they’ve paid for meals. So now meals are now provided, anything else needed to be mentioned?”

“That’s good enough,” He said. “We might need to get vegetables for the ponies, but other than that, we’ll survive on bacon.”

A noisy slurping sound came from the back of the group, and saw Jane drinking his coke with a straw. He also lifted his burger bag, to remind the humans that he had burgers.

Dell snatched the bag, and pulled out a bacon cheeseburger. “Getting bacon,” he salivated.

Jane snatched the bag back and started to hand out biscuits with sausage and egg in the middle. “Eat up, I just found out more secrets about this thing!”

“Like what?” Mikhail asked.

“I can get anything from sandwiches to breakfast sandwiches and veggie burgers to steak burgers!” He said while handing a veggie burger to Big Macintosh.

“Can I at least get into my room?” Richard said.

“Yes, let’s,” the headmistress said. “So I can finally check up on what’s happening on your pony friend.”

As if on cue, a scream from one of the rooms was heard.

“Talk dirty to me Gilda!” Twilight screamed.

Pinkie pulled out a sax from nowhere, and started to play a song. It went perfectly well, but a couple of the mercenaries knew where the reference came from. The others, they thought it was a good joke.

The griffon facepalmed— or was it clawed? — And started back up the stairs. Again, the hallway was wooden, but it was brighter than the other hallway, and instead it smelled of oak rather than pine. So the result was a warmer feeling; a feeling of being at home, knowing that you’re safe from the outside terrors of a child’s point of view. Instantly, the mercenaries sighed, and ran to a room. Each member picked a door. The first three were Richard, Jennifer, and Jane. The second was Dell, Tavish, and Mikhail. And the third was Arvin, Jacques, and Nick.

The rooms were set into four on both sides; one started on the left and nine was on the right. Richard opened the door, half-expecting his room to be filled with posters of the Red Socks, the Boston skyline, various hats he found, and his pet dog sitting on his bed.

What was in the room, had not only made him disappointed that he didn’t see them, but made him kind of curious that he had only one bed, and had to share with a pony. He instantly slammed the door behind him and locked it. Then he started to grab his belongings, only realizing that they’re still outside of the room, with a very disapproving blue pony waiting outside of the door.

“You know you cannot hide in there forever!” Dash said. “You gotta have your cans of Crit-a’-cola sometime!”

“At least I have my,” he stared at the current items in his hand, the plasma pistol he bought in one hand, and a hamburger in the other. “At least I have my meat!”

Dash snickered. “Of course you have your meat, but I have your stuff!”

“Oh yea?” He stood, and was about to open the door.

Richard thought up a plan, what if he could take a slice of bacon from the burger, and throws it right in Dash’s mouth? She’ll most likely react, and possibly spit it out. In that exact moment of time, he’ll take his bags and throw it inside the room. She’ll probably still be reacting to the meat in mouth, and try to get the flavor out. And once she’s done, the door will probably be locked and he’ll be safe from then on!

If only plans worked out like how you thought it would be.

Richard grabbed a piece of bacon, and opened the door. He instinctively threw the bacon, right into the headmistress’ face and grabbed his bags. Then he finally closed and locked the door. He let out a breath of air he had been holding since he opened the door. He finally then noticed the person he threw the piece of bacon right at.

Richard slowly opened to door, the reveal the headmistress still standing where she was and a piece of bacon on her beak. Richard grabbed the bacon, and ate it. While he munched, the griffon stood and stared at him with the blankest expression she had ever given.

“You know,” she started after a moment of silence. “If you wanted your meat in face, you could come and join your purple pony friend downstairs.”

Richard swallowed, and spoke. “I really don’t want to, but where’d the blue pony go to?

“She went with the pink-coloured one and went into the room next door.”

“Well, I hope you’ve had a good day so far!” Richard smiled. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go and relax in my room.”

“No problem,” the headmistress said. “My name is Drako and,” she looked down the hallway. “If you want a private session, then come ask me.”

Richard back away a bit, “I, uh, I’ll think about it.”

“It’s on the house,” she persuaded.

“Maybe I will, but not now.”

“Okay then, the offer stands until the day we get bread,” she turned and started to leave.

Richard closed the door, and turned to find Dash napping on a cloud she’d brought in from the nearby window. He sighed, and started to take his weapons out. He failed one plan, but if the pony brought her own bed, then this day will be just fine. It’s only; he looked at his watch, “Two o’clock.”

“What about two o’clock?” Dash muttered.

“That changeling said something about he’ll be back in about three hours from noon,” Richard explained. “And that’s three o’clock; I hope Arvin and Dell thought up a decent plan to takeover this city.”

“Oh well,” she muttered. She then removed the cloud into nothing but fog, and glided towards the bed. “Richard, please come and nap with me.” She slurred. “I’m soo tired, an Ah betchu you are too!” Dash rolled to her back and lolled her tongue. “I demands belly wubs...”

Richard walked to the bed and started to rub the soft fur of the belly. “There I hope you’re happy!” he said. “I’ve got to go and see what our plans are.”

“Please,” she moaned. “Can I at least cuddle with you?”

“No, you’re drunk.”

“Fine,” she rolled to her side and started to snore.

Richard rolled his eyes, and exited the room. He walked across the hallway and opened the door to Arvin’s room. He found Fluttershy munching on a Payday bar while watching a topless Arvin do sit-ups.

“Hey medic,” Richard said, leaning on the doorway. “What are your plans for the capture point?”

“We couldn’t get a decent plan set-up since we don’t have a map anyways,” he said. “So we’re just wingin’ it.”

“Really?” he asked. “So not like, ‘I go capture first and everyone else could try and catch up while Dell builds a teleporter’?”

“What are you talking about,” Arvin replied, still doing sit-ups. “That’s always the strategy! We only change it if we’re on limited people. Ninety-eight, ninety-nine, one hundred,” He got from the floor and stood up to replace his shirt. “This time, we’re evenly matched and there’s no way to build a proper strategy since we don’t know how the changelings act.”

“Remember?” Richard’s body was suddenly swarmed with green fire, and he had changed into a griffon. “We’re part changelings now, so we might be able to read what they are thinking of! Actually, right now I’m getting orders from the Hive Mind to collect us so that we can have a meeting.”

“Oh right…” Arvin placed a hand to his chin and also changed, but it was into a changeling. “I’m surprised the Zealot didn’t notice about our condition. By the way, you partner has started to use the bat. She’s virtually finished becoming a changeling. Fluttershy!” She squeaked. “Go and tell Dash that she should never tell anybody about her new power, and if she asks you why you know. Just say magic.”

The pegasus did a small salute and walked out of the room. Richard watched the pony head into his room, and then turned his attention to the German. “So, do you think that Dash will actually follow your orders?”

“I doubt it, but it may actually work,” Arvin said, changing back into his normal form with Richard following suit. “I still need to know how this new power exactly works.”

“I barely even use it,” Richard replied. “It’s like getting a haircut, you only need it just to fix yourself once a month.”

“That’s true, but it was really helpful trying to disguise myself as Fluttershy’s Dad when her school reunion came.”

“By the way,” Richard started. “Did you ever find out how old are these ponies?”

“I have no idea!” Arvin shook his head. “It would be helpful though.”

A tap was felt on Richard’s shoulder. It was the headmistress. “I’ve got important news, an armoured changeling is here to take you to the Lunar team.”

Richard checked his watch, it read three o’ five. “Tell him all us will be there in about five minutes.”

“He told me that he wanted the ones named Richard, Arvin, Jacques, and Dell.”

“Well tell him five minutes anyways.” Arvin said.

“I will my dears,” she turned and headed down the stairs, but not without giving a wink at them.

“Well, time to gather the ones we need,” Richard said.

“Agreed,” was his reply.

(….)

Several hours later found the unfortunate four back in the lobby of the brothel with some new items such as; cuts from knives, half ripped clothing leaving most with just boxers, shoes and socks, Arvin still trying to replace Jacques’ left arm back into place with the medigun, and Dell repairing his right machine hand.

This all started because one person made one too many snide comments. The starter of such fight was the one and only Richard. The enemy spy, had continued to poke fun of his fear, and not only gotten a hit from Richard’s Holy Mackerel, but responded with an attempted stab with a Kunai at Richard’s stomach. The two set out a brawl by Richard hitting the Lunar Heavy with the fish, and he responded by making a shot from his Family Business. The shot missed, but it hit Jacques in the left arm, and he fell to the ground, holding the now twitching stub. Arvin tried to heal Jacques while at the same time heal Richard while he was getting into a bitter fight with the Spy.

By the time order was re-established—which by the way, was made possible by a level three construct sentry standing behind the Lunar team ready to fire—they departed ways. They were done with the meeting anyways, but they only needed to gossip about their clients—which was very popular when there was nothing else to do.

Jacques held his arm in the exact position it was supposed to be, and Arvin released the newly-coloured yellow aura to heal the injured limb.

Richard started chuckling. The rest of the small group stared at him curiously.

“What are ya laughin’ about?” Dell asked.

“Oh nothing, it’s just that we are still who we were back in Arizona,” Richard said, giggling. “Only this time we’re in a country with nothing but ponies and we still act like nothing ever changed.”

Arvin smiled, noticing that virtually nothing had changed in their behavior. “Ain’t that the truth?”

“Heh,” Jacques said. “I still remember how Richard came up behind the RED Heavy and started to hit him with your Atomizer.” He started to laugh. “He acted like there was nothing even touching him!”

“Oh, oh!” Dell started. “Remember that time when you came up to that RED Sniper and said, ‘seduce me’?”

They started laughing harder now, “Oh I remember that! He started to try his best, thinking that I was an actual teammate!” Jacques said. “Also, remember that comeback Nick came up to the RED spy?”

“Oh yea!” Richard yelled. “That spy was like ‘what’re you going to do about it? Run five miles away and try to shoot me there?’ Nick didn’t even know what to say!”

They laughed even harder; so hard, that Drako appeared wondering what the conversation was about, but didn’t say a thing.

“Remember that time we had started that conga line?” Arvin gasped.

“Aw man! That day was the best!” Richard stated. “The RED team just stood there and just watched as our line came and capped the point!”

They laughed even more. But they eventually slowed to a stop. Wondering where the days had gone by, Jacques pulled out a cigarette and lit it.

“You know, I wonder what would happen to Mann Co. now that we’re gone.” Richard said.

Suddenly, Jacques’ cigarette fell out of his mouth and he didn’t make an attempt to pick it up. “If the dark coloured alicorn said that she hired us, doesn’t that mean Mann Co. is no more?”

“But what would happen to Blutarch and Redmond? Would they just, die?” Dell said.

“Who knows, but somewhere I heard there was a rival company of Mann Co. that wanted the company gone. The biggest secret, I hear they’re building robots to doing the exterminating!” Arvin replied. “But it’s just a rumor I heard. I even bet they’re even programmed to yell exterminate as they go and do their job.”

“Are you sure it was ‘just a rumor’?”

Arvin shrugged, “It’s probably about as real as Richard dating Jennifer.”

“H-hey!” Richard stammered.

“It’s true is it?” Jacques asked. “No, wait! You still don’t properly know how to ask a girl don’t you?”

“I-I- I have no comment about it,” Richard blushed. “I’m just going to head upstairs and sleep. We got our first fight tomorrow.” He left the remainder three for themselves.

“That’s true,” Dell said. “Let’s go and… Wait, headmistress, how long have you been standing there?”

“You can call me Drako,” She replied. “And I’ve been standing here since you’ve talked about that conga line.” She fixed her Kimono, which was somewhat loose on her.

“Oh,” Arvin said. “Well goodnight Drako.”

“Goodnight.”

Dell just waved his hand back as he climbed the stairs to the second floor leading to his room. Once he reached his room, he opened the door to see Applejack lying on the bed peacefully sleeping.

The Texan shook her awake, and her eyes fluttered at first, but opened once she noticed who was waking her.

“Ah think it’s about that time we should talk,” Dell said. “And I just want to say-“

Applejack placed a hoof on his lips to shush him. “Just let me be honest and say that I love you, and that’s it.”

Dell nodded. “I understand. So let’s keep this a secret, alright?”

Applejack lightly gasped. “You mean?”

“Yep,” he said. “Also, don’t tell your brother, he might kill me.”

She giggled, “More than that, he’ll give you a rundown to make you not do this.”

“Well, I guess that’s it,” Dell finished, changing into pajamas. “So let’s sleep and that’ll be it.” He slid into the bed, pulling the sheets over him, and turned off his lamp.

Meanwhile, Big Macintosh stood outside of the door, with a shocked look on his face. He was about to finally have that talk with Dell, but it resolved within its own realm. Now to deal with sleeping with huge burly human; never he had shared a bed with another stallion, except with his cousin on a bad camping trip. But that was because he forgot to bring a sleeping bag.

Big Mac shook his head. He really didn’t want to talk to the engineer about taking good care of his sister, but that can wait until this trip is over. The way this week is starting out, he’ll need less to think about and more action instead.

He yawned, and heard Twilight scream from downstairs. With every ‘session’ an hour long, she should be at number ten. He chuckled, and started to wonder how this evening would turn out if he picked the longest one?

It wasn’t hard to pick the shortest one; it was poking out of the bottom Jacques hand. You could’ve only gotten the largest one if you were the last one in line to pick. And that’s exactly what happened.

Mac opened the door to his room, and found the Russian sleeping underneath a fur blanket. Where he got it was mystery, but it was warmer than a campfire.

He walked to the bed and slid under the covers, and fell into a deep sleep.

BoS Day two: Getting you left foot wet.

Jacques slowly opened his eyes, only to be met with white fur in his face. He caught a whiff of the mare, and tried desperately to not sneeze. The Frenchman got up as to not disturb Rarity from her deep sleep; like nothing ever happened, she continued to snore quietly, and drew the blankets closer to her body.

He looked at the cute scene, and smirked. It wasn’t every day that you remembered you ended up being in a bed with a fashionista, especially if one could’ve been accidentally presumed to be Jacques’ pet.

He then walked to a nearby white vanity and studied his facial features in the event he might need to shave once more. Jacques grunted in dismay, and pulled out his casual butterfly knife to polish it off before shaving. He walked to his suitcase and pulled out a can of shaving cream and then returned to the mirror and started to apply the cream.

Jacques reached for the blade, and slowly started to remove the rough fuzz. Eventually, he reached for the neck section, and started to shave more slowly. Not wanting to cut himself, he sat down and started to use both hands.

He stopped, and took a second to find a bucket of water to wash his face with. Without any luck, he turned his head and saw that there were no towels to be found. He stood, and ventured back to Rarity.

Jacques loomed over her, and saw that Rarity’s mane sprawled all over the bed. Grabbing it with an ungloved hand, he wiped his face into the purple mane. He stopped and looked at the now frizzy mane. Jacques touched his face, and felt the cool cream still lingering. He looked at the sleeping body, and leaned in to her side.

He rubbed his face onto the soft fur, and felt the cream remove from his face. The Frenchman got up, and saw that his black facial hair had been placed into Rarity’s fur where the shaving cream resided. Jacques put a hand over his mouth to quiet his giggles.

Rarity did a sleepy moan and turned to where her belly was facing up. The spy walked back to his suitcase, replaced the can, and traded it for his usual suit. Not wanting to stay in his same getup, he also grabbed a fez, a pair of sunglasses, and a scarf.

He fastened the last button on his coat and straightened his pant leg. Jacques then looked in the vanity mirror, and did a quick taunt to himself. He smiled, and finally walked over to the pony and started to shake her awake.

Rarity opened her eyes, and saw Jacques shaking her. “May I get five more minutes?” she muttered.

“No,” Jacques replied sternly, and checked his watch. Eight thirty-five it said. “Everybody should be up and ready by ten. We’re having our first battle half an hour later.”

The white unicorn bolted from the bed and ran out of room.

Jacques looked where she had disappeared, and assumed she was probably looking for the bathroom. In fact, he just remembered that he needs to use it too. He stood, and followed where the unicorn had disappeared to.

Meanwhile, Richard was digging into his luggage to find his upgraded earpiece. Since he had gone into that mysterious white and clean store back in New Mexico, he went back and bought newer items. Like the earpiece that’ll never break inside his ear ever again. He gave his old one to Rainbow Dash since he no longer had a use for it. Although he had bought the new earpiece, he never quite remembered about it.

Richard threw one of his plush dolls of himself back. Dash was watching Richard as the plushie hit her cup, and she spilled whatever was in it on herself.

“Hey!” she growled. “Watch it! I have to go and clean myself now.”

“Shouldn’t you be drinking coffee?” Richard replied. “You had a helluva hangover early this morning.”

Dash scoffed. “As if! I was just having a little headache, that’s all.”

“Uh-huh, so if I clap my hands it’s totally not going to be really loud right?” He asked.

“Shut up,” she countered.

Richard chuckled, and started to adjust the new earpiece. Once carefully fit, he grabbed a few accessories and started to place them in their rightful places.

“What’s with the getup?” Dash said once Richard placed a hat on his head, showing off with a milkman style hat.

“Oh, it’s just a fun thing everyone likes to do,” he replied while putting on a pair of elf shoes with a bell on the end.

“So you guys put on silly things, just for fun?”

“Yep!” Richard said, finishing the set-up by inserting a pair of ear-buds.

Rainbow Dash walked next to Richard, “Could you scratch this small spot behind my ear, it’s bugging the crap out of me.”

He sighed and started the mundane task. “You have to be ready too. It’s already nine-twenty. We’re supposed to be out and ready by the front door by ten.”

“Really? Fine then, just let put on this small hat. What do you call this by the way?” She held up a small trucker’s cap. “On the inside, it says ‘I love horses’. Did you do this?”

Richard grabbed the cap and looked on a tag. “This one is named Ellis’ Cap, but I don’t even know a person named Ellis.”

“Well, it’s Rainbow Dash’s Cap now!” She snatched it and placed it on her head, oddly fitting to her head size.

A soft knock on the door caught Richard’s attention. He looked back at the proud pegasus. “You can’t have that hat you know,” he said, pointing at her. “But I’m going to let you use it today.”

She shrugged. “You better get the door, it’s probably AJ or Flutters coming by.”

He opened the door, half-expecting one of the two to be there, but instead it was Drako standing in the doorway.

“You know,” the griffon started. “All of your friends are waiting at the front door waiting for you two. I decided to come up and tell you that in case you were doing… something.”

“Nope!” Richard replied. “In fact, was just about to leave, yep!”

Rainbow Dash stopped him in his tracks by hovering in front of him. “What about our weapons? Don’t we need them?”

The Bostonian gave a dismissive hand, “They’ll be there once we get there. Engie usually gets there before anyone. He would build a teleporter here first, then builds one there just so that we’ll have it before the area get set up.”

She gave him a quizzical look, “So… Dell builds a thingy here before we leave, and he leaves while everypony is getting ready just so that he can do that?”

“Yep, and since I’m usually the late one, everyone had already left and they expect me to get their weapons for them, which is why I’m heading out right now!” Richard pushed Dash out of the way, jumped over Drako, and ran down the stairs. He almost ran into an exhausted Twilight Sparkle, but jumped over her also and landed with a roll. He reached the lobby, and found out that Drako had been telling right about everybody already here.

Jacques and Dell were playing an intense game of chess; Arvin and Jennifer was having a rock, paper, scissors battle; Fluttershy was playing with the German Shepard; Dell and Applejack were nowhere to be found of course; and everyone else was talking or mulling around.

Richard felt a nudge on his hip and found Twilight trying to push him out of the way. He moved, and saw Dash riding on her back.

“Don’t ask,” she growled.

Richard shrugged, and poked the Jacques on the shoulder. The Frenchman stood from his seat and stepped on top of it, “I need everyone’s attention!”

The mass of people and equine stopped and stared at the slender man. “Today is the first official day and battle of this city in which ponies call Stalliongrad. Most of us today just want this enemy team to go down to hell where some belong! We know we will be fighting our doppelganger rivals, mainly humans, and the humans know that for the ponies it’ll be a difficult time. But hold strong! We’ll most likely lose this one, but at least we had a good time!”

Nick interrupted, “Enough chit-chat! Let’s get these bloody bastards now! It’s bad enough that we have to wait before the battle starts!”

Jacques facepalmed, “I was just getting to the point. Now, let’s go and kill them! Let’s make sure they’ll never… What is it Fluttershy?”

“U-u-um,” she stuttered, pulling on his pant leg. “A-are we really going to k-kill them?”

Jacques chuckled, “In a way yes. You’ll find out once we get there.”

A crackle in the air was made behind the group and a flash of light appeared. Everyone closed their eyes and tried to look into the flash of light to find the source. What they found was Dell holding The Eureka Effect and recovering from the slight nauseating warp.

“And there’s the engineer that’s going to help us deal with them!” Scout had announced.

Dell chuckled, “If a Spy doesn’t come up and sap my equipment. Now let’s go! I’m ready to wipe their dumb smiles off their stupid faces!”

(……….)

The mass of people and pony alike slowly trudged on towards their destination. Goo and green pods litter the streets of the town, most pods lay empty, while others carry a pony in an entranced sleep. The humans became insensitive after the first batch and the ponies tearfully looked away, knowing that they can to help them, but their job had been lain elsewhere.

Twilight slowly became less caring, but still wished she had her power to release the poor ponies. It was consumed away from her last night, and left her with nothing but only the power to lift simple things. The alicorn looked away, and started to walk faster towards the front of the group.

With only a few blocks to go according to the medic, the humans started to become jumpy and eager to pull the trigger, ready to unload their might with get this over with. The ponies started to arrange their weapons with an uninterested fashion, not really looking forward to doing this, except for Pinkie who only giggled and started to run on her hind legs to properly hold her flamethrower.

The pyro followed suit, and then started skipping while a ballonicorn unexplainably followed her. Scout rolled his eyes with a sigh and ran ahead to alert the other team so that they can prepare.

Engineer raised a hand, and walked to a nearby building where a garage-like door opened revealing a small room with lockers, a kiosk, and a cabinet filled with ammo and medical equipment. The ponies gaped with awe at such a white room. A Celestia-theme filled where the original BLU theme would go.

Heavy walked to the kiosk, and placed his hand on the screen. It gave a green hue and a small ping of confirmation. The Jacques followed suit, and so did the rest of the humans. The ponies stared at the mysterious machine.

Twilight immediately jolted from her haze, and ran to study it. She reached for her notebook, or at least, where it would’ve been if not for the store owner she usually visits was out of it.

The pony muttered a curse, and propped herself on the machine, accidently placing a hoof on the screen and registering herself into the system. Twilight shrank back when it pinged, and stared at the green screen. She couldn’t read what it said—since she never had to read human script.

A poke in her shoulder got her attention and the pony looked, to find Richard gently shoving her out of the way. She scooted over, and let the Bostonian pass. He crouched, and glided his hand over the button interface underneath the screen. He looked, and saw a switch and flipped it to turn on audio for the kiosk.

Richard stood and proceeded with the usual procedure. The screen flared green, but instead of doing a ‘ping’, it said, “You are now registered into the spawning system; please move over so that the rest can get registered.”

Richard did as the machine told, and sat down on the bench with a wrapped mackerel in his hand. “You guys are supposed to touch the blue coloured square. To able to stay alive while we’re fighting for this section of land, you have to do it.” He said.

Dash scoffed. “I could take them all out! I bet you a thousand bits I’ll never die!”

“You go right ahead, just saying that a sentry or a Pyro could be waiting at the next corner waiting to turn you into a thousand bits.”

“Wait! You mean they also have a pyro?” she asked.

Jacques pulled his cigarette out of his mouth. “If anything, they are basically our team, just a different colour. So you better watch your back whenever we are fighting—especially whenever there’s a spy.”

“Like you?” Pinkie stated, removing her hoof from the screen.

“I’m an exception,” Jacques threw his butt of the cigarette away. “Let’s just put it at the fact that if you can hurt me, then I’m the enemy. But only on the battlefield.”

The ponies gave a sound of realization, but that suddenly changed to a look of confusion.

Big Macintosh raised a hoof, “So if you say that I cannot hurt you, would that mean the world is banana shaped?”

Nick raised his hand for a five, “Give me a good one!” He grinned cheerfully. Mac looked at him quizzically, then raised his hoof to slap the hand.

“What was that for?” said the red pony.

“You didn’t understand the reference?” Nick replied.

“What reference? I just made that up.”

“Oh,” the Aussie sighed, sitting back down.

Scout shook his head, “You got remember snipe; they don’t know who Monty Python is.”

“You got to be joking! These mates never got to enjoy comedy!”

“Scout dear,” Jennifer started. “You still have Arvin’s computer, maybe he has a movie on there.”

“Yea but, it’s back at the place in my stuff.”

“You actually brought that?” Dash said. “I thought it had disappeared along with that popcorn.”

“I actually ate the rest,” the medic said, rubbing Fluttershy’s belly. “Before I had found you guys cuddling on the futon.”

“I-I wasn’t cuddling!” The pegasus said. “I uh, I needed somepony to stay warm next-“

“Everyone is registered!” The machine declared. “Get your loadouts ready and please await further instructions.”

The humans stood. “I want to watch them cry like little babies!” Heavy yelled. “They will feel my bullets, in their face!”

“Alright! Calm down Mikhail, we don’t need to have rage here already! Just give it about four more minutes and then you can crush them.” Richard said.

Heavy grunted, and then sat down, adjusting his Warrior’s Spirit.

Macintosh sat next to him and pulled out a sandvich. “Now’s a good time to eat than never,” he handed the Russian the lunchbox and pulled out another for himself.

Arvin placed his Emerald Jarate medipack on the ground and started to place a mask on his face. It looked similar to a bird mask, but the ‘beak’ curved downwards. It covered his entire face, only leaving the ears and small eye slits for visibility.

Fluttershy stared at the mask in horror, and curled up into a ball. “Please take it off, it looks scary.”

Arvin turned his head. “It’s a mask to protect myself from diseases! Well, at least that’s what the doctors during the Black Plague thought.” He wrapped a red and yellow-striped scarf around his neck. “And this is just for cosmetics. Here, take this Vita-Saw. I don’t use it as much, but you can have it.” He handed her the weapon and a hat. “This is the Ghostly Gibus, you’re supposed to earn it, but I’m going to just hand to you instead.”

“B-but I got to pay you back somehow!” Fluttershy said. “How about this token thing I found on the ground?” She revealed an engineer class token and small pile of scrap metal. “And what about this lump of metal, I’m for sure that can pay for it!”

Arvin examined the offers. “I like that you’re learning how to trade, and doing it pretty well. But I’ll just take the class token and it’s a deal!” He placed the gibus on top of Fluttershy’s head and took the token. Then, he walked towards a small table with power tools and a vice and placed his new items on it. He first grabbed two hats, and combined them together to get Max’s Severed Head. He turned his head to take a look at Fluttershy and hoped that this bunny didn’t look like Angel too much. He placed the Token back into the pack and grabbed two other weapons from a different class. Arvin threw the weapons on the table and instantly it had transformed into a pile of Scrap Metal. He then grabbed two more Scrap Metal and crafted a Reclaimed Metal. Then after that he crafted a pile of Refined Metal.

Satisfied, he walked back to Fluttershy, removed the gibus and placed the bunny hat on her head. “I made this hat and decided that it better suits you!” He said, “Since you have a rabbit as a pet.”

“Thanks!” She replied. “But it doesn’t look like Angel at all, but I like it! It feels oddly too real, is it fake?”

By then, Medic had moved from the pony and walked towards Jane, who was practicing his juggling skills with live rockets, and started to talk with trading terms.

(.)

Meanwhile at the other side of the area, Chrysalis was placing the last for her artificial foreleg on.

“It feels weird Engineer,” She said, while moving the leg side to side. “I could feel it, but it feels tougher, like I had developed a much harder exoskeleton.”

“You can say that ma’am,” Engineer said, injecting green fluid into small tubing with a needle. “This is a life support fluid, similar to your blood, but it also contains tiny machines that’ll heal you and make repairs on any mechanical parts that are damaged. It works like a regular body system; self-healing and if the body becomes desperate, it’ll try and convert anything you eat into something edible. Like meat for instance, you don’t eat it, but it’ll try and convert the nutrients and proteins for consumption.”

“…What?” The changeling replied. “I lost you after you said life support.”

“To put it simply,” the Texan removed the syringe. “You are able to eat almost anything that’s edible to other creatures and you can self-heal, but only if the injured part is like your foreleg here.”

She lifted her leg and took a closer look. “Hmm, is it possible to make a complete transformation?”

Engineer stared at her. “You mean fully convert yourself into a cyborg?”

“Yes!” She yelled. “I want to become powerful! I want to be able to become invincible!” Chrysalis lifted her arms into the air with anger. “So I can kill the one named Twilight Sparkle, or have her join my side or something.”

He stared at the insane changeling, then to his wrench. “So what will it be human?” Chrysalis said. “Is it possible?”

Engineer grinned, “It is possible, but it comes at a cost.”

“Cost?” she gasped. “Tell me this cost you speak of.”

“For one, you won’t be able to breed normal changelings, only cybernetic. And you’ll no longer be able to change like how you do.” He said. “But it also comes with advantages,” The changeling perked her ears at that. “I can install weapons into the core body frame or give you strength. Oh yea! I forgot; you can use magic like normal, but it uses up the internal battery which must be charged by ‘sleeping’.”

Chrysalis smiled wide, baring her fangs. “Then I will take this cost, let’s begin!” She jutted her hoof out. “Do we have a deal human?”

Engineer looked at the hoof, and met his hand with hers. “Deal!” He said.

The changeling turned around to walk out of the door. “You become a great weapon of mine you damned bug. I’ll be sure to leave a weakness, in case I feel like killing you.” The Texan muttered.

“What was that?” she asked. “I heard you say something.”

“Oh, nothing,” He replied. “Just saying that the announcer should mention about the-“

A speaker nearby screeched, “This is you announcer talking! Be ready to fight in forty seconds! The arena is named Urban Heat, from what I’m told, it looks familiar to your ‘Dustbowl’. A shout out to The Gryphon Brothel and to Atomic Wrangler Casino & Hotel for housing our soldiers today, thank you! This is broadcasted on Pon-3 Radio! Live from Manhattan, this is Speaker Box. Let’s go mercenaries! The mission type is Attack and Defend!”

“How dare they make this a game!” Twilight yelled. “We’re fighting for our lives here!”

Nick patted her head. “Don’t worry about it. It’s our first too, but I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t announce everything we’re doing at us. Only to the radio I’m pretty sure.”

“Better be,” Richard said. “Would hate for her to scream out that I’m really close to capping the point and then have a couple pyros burn me. Would be helpful, but that would suck.”

“What’re you talking about?” Dash spoke. “It’s a great idea!”

“Think about the other team hearing the exact same thing too!” Richard scolded. “I wouldn’t want to have a sentry placed where my favorite route is!”

“What does a sentry do exactly?” She asked.

Dell grabbed some metal from the restocking cabinet. “It shoots bullets and launches missiles at enemy targets.”

Dash’s ears folded downwards. “Oh, so it’s basically a death machine?”

Dell nodded and pulled out his PDA. He pressed a button and pulled out a large white toolbox. And set it on the ground to reveal a small sentry. “This is a level on construct,” He pulled out his wrench and started to hit it, until it reconstructed itself and added two miniguns. “This is a level two sentry.” He continued to hit the construct and ran to the restock cabinet to grab more metal and continued. It reconstructed itself and had a small box connected to the top. “This is a level three sentry.”

Dash’s eyes widened. “Is that what I would have to dodge?”

Dell nodded and pressed a button on his PDA to destroy the construct.

“Solar Team, you may now start to set up! You are the first to defend. The first team will defend, traveling backwards as Lunar Team advances! Once all the points leading up to the City Hall is captured, Lunar’s team to defend the opposite way will begin! The team that captures the most by the end of three rounds, time varies at each round depending on speed of capture, will call this plot of land their territory! Have fun and…” The announcer trailed off.

“And what?” Applejack said.

“Don’t worry about it,” Dell replied. “Let’s just get going!”

“Go, go, go!” Richard yelled with the rest of the team shouting battle cries.

Dell stopped at the front of the spawn point and placed a toolbox on the ground, upon opening revealed a teleporter entrance. As it was assembling itself, the Texan ran inside and grabbed more metal and started towards the first capture point.

Twilight ran beside him carrying what Nick called ‘The Classic’ and magically fed rounds into the slot of the gun. Once reaching the maximum number of bullets allowed, she placed the rest of the rounds inside of her pocket on her new vest. After following the human for a short amount of time, she found a large building that had small fenced doors.

“Where are they coming from?” the alicorn asked. “I don’t see them.”

Dell pointed at a small gated door. “There, if you look into your scope, you can see them waiting at the door. Sometimes they’re taunting us, hitting the door, or most of the time nowadays, doing the conga.”

“Why the conga?”

“We’ve recently learned in the rulebook that we can do this dance. So we had taught others how to do it.” A dispenser finished building itself and Dell started to work on it with his wrench. “If ah were you, I’d rather start on finding a spot where you can shoot them. If not, then you better be ready for the shootout.”

Twilight’s eyes scanned the area, and found a shed to stand on. She started to run towards there, and climbed the ladder leading towards the roof. The pony looked down the scope and saw Rainbow Dash trying to hit the enemy team on one door, saw Zecora placing sticky-bombs on another, and Fluttershy running around healing people with her medigun.

“Twilight dear,” Twilight jumped and turned around to see Rarity behind her. “Do you really think you can shoot from all the way over here?” The unicorn pulled out The Ambassador. "The design I got for everyone looks great doesn’t it?”

Twilight chuckled. “Yea, I guess it does. But I wonder what the Lunar Team’s design looks like exactly.”

Rarity scoffed, “They looked nothing compared to our design. It’s a really dark-blue, near navy and it had the moon on their shoulder. Oddly enough, it looks similar to my design but different colours.”

“You could say,” The alicorn started. “That there was a spy on our team.”

“Oh haha,” the unicorn replied. “Well, I believe the match is about to begin. I have a bad feeling it’s going to include a lot of blood.”

Twilight waved Rarity good luck and looked back into her scope. The aimed the sights right on a changeling’s head. “He looks like Spike’s class design…” She muttered. “I hope they stay as a changeling.”

Suddenly, a siren blared and the gates opened. Instinctively, she ‘pulled’ the trigger, and the head of the changeling was no more. She jumped at the explosion, and realized that she had killed somepo—no, somebody else. She felt no remorse, and then looked back at the growing mass of gunners; only to be met with gunshot from the enemy sniper.

Twilight Sparkle felt the pain instantly and tried to scream but none came out. She felt her body fall down, and felt that it was slowly losing life.

She felt warmth, but was jolted away from it to be met with a quick overview of what just happened. What the alicorn found out was that she was shot by a changeling in standing beside one of the doors that she had missed. A quick replay—“How can this happen?” she thought—revealed that the changeling was waiting to shoot her like how she did. The first shot missed, but he waited for the next chance and found it.

Twilight sighed, and saw a small screen that said she was spawning right now.

She felt another slight tug, and felt her body coming back. Only this time, instead of where she had died, Twilight appeared back at the room and found Rainbow Dash, Pinkie, and Jacques standing around her. The spy left the room leaving the bewildered ponies to wonder why they aren’t dead.

The question was answered when Jacques came back into the room. “Science, insanity, and Mann Co. who I think are no longer.” He said. “You better get over it quickly, or you’ll find yourself finding more of your friends hanging around.”

Fluttershy appeared and instantly, she ducked and whimpered. “Don’t hurt me!”

Dash ran next to her and hugged her. “It’s okay! You’re alive, at least until we actually do die.”

“What do you mean? I saw myself explode and that Demoman taunting at me! Please don’t tell me I’m in the afterlife.” She shrieked.

“It’s okay!” Jacques said. “You only respawned so that you can continue fighting. If you want a revenge kill, go and find that person and kill him, simple as that. I suggest all of you ponies over it quickly, we’re a team here. The faster you do, the faster that the Lunar Team will stay where they are!”

“The point is being captured!” A speaker yelled.

“Dammit!” the Frenchman cursed. “I suggest one of you to stay back and tell the rest of the ponies about this. The faster they know, the faster they can get over it.”

“You don’t understand!” Twilight yelled back. “We had just died! How can you tell us to get over it quickly?”

Jacques turned towards the door, and sighed. “I had the same feeling once. That was when I first got this watch.” He pulled up the Dead Ringer. “It let me live a second time. But every time I felt that I get hit or shot, my Ringer activates a dead body based off of me and it always makes me feel like I died. But instead of making two identical people, I instantly get cloaked.”

“So it made that feeling feel new again?” Pinkie said.

“Exactly,” Jacques lowered his head. “I was told by a man that this was made to kill me twice, he was named-“

The speaker screamed, “SAXXTON HAALLLEE!!!!”

Jacques pulled out his gun, “Goddamn it! How did he find us here?”

The speaker gave feedback and the then announcer spoke. “Sorry about that, I just found an audio file here and I thought I just wanted to play at least once to find out what it did. Sorry if I had scared anybody.”

The Frenchman lowered his weapon, and switched his Conniver’s Kunai for Your Eternal Reward. “Well, we must be off. Our teammates are waiting for us.”

The girls and Big Mac nodded and ran out of the room.

Jacques chuckled and followed suit, leaving Pinkie sitting in the room to tell the next pony that come by. She sat, and hummed a small song she had made up. It seemed catchy to her, but Pinkie wasn’t sure that Vinyl would like it. Or would she? Pinkie shrugged, turned her head, and saw a pink unicorn.

Pinkie gasped, and grabbed the balloon and placed it on her back. She started walking around the small room and hummed.

“Uhh Pinkie,” Zecora said. “Don’t you think you should be fighting with us rather than playing hooky?”

“Hmm… Hooky,” Pinkie placed a hoof to her chin. “Oh yea! Zecora, I was told to tell you that you should—“

“Get over my death moment?” Zecora finished. “I already did, blame my old country Zebroid for having defibrillators.”

“What’s a defibra- defibrillt,” Pinkie stuttered.

“A defibrillator is a device to ‘resurrect’ the dead. It only works if the person died within five minutes.” Zecora said. “I was disappointed when I came to Equestria that it was so low-tech.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that we already know how to fly everybody, we have vehicles that are faster than your carriages, and have armour that is stronger than your gold and wood.” The zebra said. “You go and tell Twilight about that. Besides, you guys never come by to actually say hi. If you did, I would’ve at least given you something to improve your lives.” She said sadly.

“Oh don’t worry,” Pinkie walked up and hugged her. “I’ll be sure to come and visit every so often!”

“Thanks,” she replied.

“You’re welcome! Now let’s go and hurt those poopy-heads!” Pinkie stated. “I have a feeling that they’re going to feel my Backscratcher!”

“But Pinkie, were you supposed to help the others recover from their death moment?”

The pink mare placed a hoof on her chin. “Oh yea, go get them Zecora!”

The zebra chuckled lifted the Scotsman Skullcutter unto her shoulder. “I plan to do so.” She ran out of the room leaving the pyro.

Once Zecora exited the small spawn room, she found a teleporter and stepped on it. In a flash, she appeared in the heat of the battle, and happened to hear a death scream just on her left. She looked and saw that an enemy spy had died with no obvious reason how. She shrugged and ran towards the first capture point. What the zebra found was a splatter of blood and an enemy soldier launching a rocket right at her feet.

She jumped to her right and rolled out of the way. She raised her head, and saw the Lunar Soldier swinging his shovel down. Zecora raised her axe, blocking the attack and made attempt to cut the human’s stomach in two.

Soldier jumped away and decided to pull out his shotgun. He pulled the trigger, and found it was out of ammo. He tried to reload, but Zecora swung her blade downwards, cutting off the soldier’s right arm.

“Ah no!” He yelled in pain. “My blood, damn you!” The soldier tried to swing with his shovel with his other arm, but saw the axe-blade once again from his left. He gasped and felt the cold steel against his neck before he went to re-spawn.

Zecora smiled, and turned back towards the capture point and saw that it had already been ‘capped’. She left out a breath of disappointment before feeling a knife plunge her back.

Applejack placed a sentry nearby the second point and started to hit it. She sighed, and hoped her level two construct was good enough. The farm pony looked around and found an ammo stash. She looked back at the entrance, and then ran towards the stash. Her metal counter refilled and she ran back towards her sentry. Not a single bullet was shot yet, so she pulled out her PDA and selected the dispenser.

After placing the dispenser, she started to get suspicious about the emptiness of the second point. Looked deeper in the entrance, she saw that the humans were pushing them back right in the doorway.

She chuckled, and started to upgrade her dispenser. Once reaching level three on the dispenser, Applejack relaxed and watched as the humans and pony ran out of the spawn room to defend the doorway. An occasional Scout got out, but was quickly shot down by the sentry.

Pinkie ran out of the doorway and heading right towards her. Applejack smiled, “Hey Pinkie! Having fun?”

The pyro nodded and stood next to the dispenser. Applejack looked back at the spawn room and found a bouncing Pinkie pyro coming out of it. She gasped, and looked back where the other Pinkie was, and found a changeling pointing a DiamondBack to her head.

“No hard feelings,” the changeling said. “It’s just business.”

Applejack closed her eyes, waiting for the re-spawn view, and heard a gunshot. She flinched, but didn’t feel any pain. The orange pony slowly opened her eyes and found Dell holding his Frontier Justice. “Always check if the person coming up to your constructs are not spies.” He said placing a sentry. “Just try and hit them; if it connects, then they’re usually the enemy.”

“Thanks Dell,” she replied. “Y’know, I could use a bit of assistance back here.”

“I’m already on it,” the engineer suddenly lifted his head, and looked towards his back. “Spy sappin’ my sentry! I’ll be right back.” He ran towards the doorway entrance. “Get over here ya sissy!”

Applejack smiled, and watched as the human ran to save his construct from total disaster.

“Oooh!” a voice behind him cooed. “Looks like something’s happening!”

She turned, and saw Pinkie smiling with a gleam in her teeth. “If I’m thinking right, you are being cuckoo for him!”

“Just keep it a secret,” the farm pony replied. “Promise me you will.”

“Cross my heart and hope to fly,” Pinkie recited. “Stick a cupcake in my eye! If anything, I should be telling the rest of our friends about this. But since you asked, I’ll keep it a secret.”

“The final control point is being captured!” The speaker screeched.

“Wait a minute here… Ah thought Ah had placed a sentry over here!” Applejack turned and saw that indeed a sentry was placed, but was destroyed by a sapper. “So that was that crackling sound.”

“I’ll help!” Pinkie yelled and ran towards the enemy scout standing at the point. She pulled the trigger, and sent a burning jet of flames towards the human. With a scream, he tried to run away, but the pain of the fire slowed him down. He fell, and watched as the pony pyro came closer with the flamethrower. Pinkie once again pulled the trigger and sent another jet of flames at the burning enemy.

Pinkie skipped away, leaving the burning scout. She looked back at the point and saw that a few enemy changelings were standing on the point. The pony did a battle cry and tried to burn the creatures. She reached them, and was about to pull the trigger, but the announcer yelled. “You failed Solar Team! The final control point has been captured!”

The changelings looked at her with a smile and launched a couple of explosives right at her feet. She made a frown, and exploded.

(…)

Richard looked at his watch and figured out the time. “Only five more minutes until one o’clock.”

“What’s so special about one o’clock?” Dash replied, firing a bullet from her Winger. “It’s just a time!”

“And?” Scout replied. “We’ve been fighting for about two hours and twenty-five minutes now, with literally no break!”

“Yea, so?” She replied. “Can’t handle it?”

“I can, but I’m starving! Aren’t you a little hungry too?”

Dash blushed as her stomach audibly roared, “Not really! I could use a nap though.”

“That’s what I’d thought!” Richard said. “Come on, let’s go and capture the final point. I’m pretty sure there ain’t any sentries there yet.”

“Yet,” she muttered.

The scout ran into a doorway leading towards a flight of stairs. “Hey Dash! Catch up and maybe I’ll give you a weapon better than that stock one you have.”

“I don’t need a better weapon!” She yelled, following Richard into a long hallway. “I’m pretty good where I’m at!”

“You sure? I have this Soda Popper here that’ll let me jump about fifteen times.”

“…Oh it’s on!” She pushed more energy into her step. “I bet I’ll get there before you even realize it!”

Richard chuckled, and pressed a little button on the gun. “I’ll see you topside!” He exited out of the hallways and jumped up towards a metal bridge leading to the last control point. “Oh and by the way, there is a ramp on the far side of this ditch!”

Dash growled and ran towards the ramp and made her way up. She looked to her right, and saw the scout leisurely standing there with the scattergun on his shoulder. “You cheat!”

“It was all fair and square pony.” He replied. “I just had a weapon that made me better! Just be glad that this point is now captured.”

“Success!” The announcer yelled. “You have secured the final control point! Please wait in your spawn rooms once returned to receive further instructions.” Dash glared at him, and crossed her arms.

“Give it here Rainbow!” Richard raised his hand in the air.

Dash paused, “What do you mean ‘give it here’?”

“You know, like a high-five—er, hoof.”

“Oh okay then,” she hit the hand with her hoof. “This will be the only time you’ll feel my hoof by the way. I don’t like it when ponies do that, or humans.”

He shrugged, “Let’s go back to spawn, I’m too tired to run back.”

“Well, see ya later then!” she unfurled her wings and flew in the general direction, leaving the scout to walk by himself.

Eventually, Richard had crossed the corner and found one teammate standing outside. “Yo Solly! What’s up?”

Jane turned his head, “We have a teleporter to take us to our break area.”

“Where is it?”

“It’s in the city park.” He replied, drinking his coke.

“So how long do we have to wait? I’m starving!” The scout clenched his stomach.

“It’s our turn, you’re last as usual,” Jane jumped on the pad.

Richard sighed, and jumped on the pad and waited for it to charge up. He felt a slight tingle, and instantly found himself standing a luscious green clearing next to a couple of wooden tables.

Nearby, on the other side of the clearing, was the Lunar Team sitting and eating. He looked around some more, and found his own teammates not too far from him also siting and eating. Richard smiled, and with a sprint, he reached them and was handed a paper lunch sack by Jennifer.

“This was all that was left,” She said. “We made this and also, the other team is willing to do trade and maybe have a conversation or two with us.”

“You kidding?” Richard asked. “I thought they completely hated us.”

“Not really, they were just set under the same rules and similar contract as us; kill the other team for our leader. But really, they’re almost just like us, except some of our friends here have extreme rivalry. Like Jacques and François, even though sometimes they get along very well.”

The Bostonian reached into his sack and pulled out a box of juice. “Are you serious? I’m not a little kid!”

Jennifer laughed, “It was either that or raisins. Also, the other things that are in your bag is a bologna and tuna sandwich, a slice of steak, a bottle of water, some chocolate, and some cotton candy from the helpful Discord guy who kept this park looking great.”

Nick walked by and gave Richard a pat on the back. “This place reminds me of the time I had to visit New Zealand.”

“And this is relevant why?” Jennifer asked.

“No reason, just putting it out there,” he said. “By the way, we won the plot of land we were fighting for.”

“No shit,” Jane said behind Jennifer. “It took us forever but at least we got it!”

“So we’re done for the day?” Richard said.

“If you want,” Twilight replied from a table nearby. “This is basically a social time for all of us. If you want to head back to brothel, go talk to Discord, he could teleport you back.”

“Oh yes, I could teleport you back, but with a price!” A disembodied voice said. “In fact, I think we should play a game!”

“Discord!” Fluttershy yelled. “What’d I tell you about this?”

“What? I just wanted to play a game with these humans. I doubt they wouldn’t mind,” Discord replied. “Besides, I get to play this game too!”

“Alright, what’s your deal,” Jacques yelled. “Or I’ll be sure Heavy here gets a good hit in you!”

“Oh so threatening, you humans!” the voice replied. “In fact, I’ll have you team up with you enemy team here! Let’s place a spawn room now!”

“Wai-,” Richard yelled before reappearing into a room. “I was just finishing my piece of chocolate.”

“I’m terribly sorry,” Discord’s voice replied. A flash of light appeared, and a large chocolate bar appeared in his hand.

“Good enough,” he bit into the bar, and almost dropped the bar. Richard remembered the taste; it was the kind of candy that his stepfather gave him sometimes. He loved the flavor and savored every single bite. Whether it was the fancy name or the texture of it in his mouth, he wanted to know where it was from.

“Yes, I do know what you guys love, I am Discord after all.”

“Hey Scout,” a voice beside him said. “Still can’t believe that you finally gotten over your rainbow fear.”

“I’m going to head-butt you if you don’t shut up François,” Richard replied. “I’ll make sure it’ll hurt.”

“Don’t worry about it! We’re on the same team for now if you haven’t noticed,” François sneered.

“What do you mean?” Richard said.

“What I mean is that we’re going to have to use teamwork if we’re going to survive,” He replied.

“Survive what?”

Suddenly, a large projector screen appeared and started to show a video. “This game that we’re playing now,” Discord spoke through the screen. “Is what I call Arena. It’s where you take the best among yourselves and face me! I, on the other hand, will be having multiple aliases that you’ll be fighting! The best two out of three! The first alias,” a picture had shown on the large screen, revealing the alias. “Yes I know you may have faced him before, but think of it as a good way. He’s not actually here! Ok scratch that, it still might be bad. Anyways, are you ready?” His voice changed to fit. “Because get ready for SAXTON HAAAAALE!!!”

Richard gulped, “I might as well go home instead.”

“Remember,” Jennifer said. “This was the price we had to pay?”

“Aw crap! So what is it? Eighteen people against one? We’ll take him down easily!” Richard yelled triumphantly.

“It’s time,” Discord yelled. “To make you extinct like all the other animals that I’ve done!”

“Yea, you ready for this guy?” Richard yelled. “Let’s go! He’ll be easy!”

(…)

Richard gasped for air, and ran across the corner. After two map rotations, a round each, the alias got progressively more creepy or scary. The last one was the Headless Horseless Horseman, and the one before was a discorded sniper named Christian Brutal Sniper. This one happened to be the scariest one, and there was also a theme song to along with the alias. The Discord guy called him Freddy Frazbear. But Richard just named him Bear.

The scout tried to hold his breath, he only has to survive the onslaught and try to kill him. But with the occasional screech and random disembodied head of the bear appearing every so often caught him in a near panic state.

Richard pulled his shotgun closer to his body, with six more teammates left on the battlefield. They could easily kill this animatronic. He pulled out his shotgun shells and quickly counted the amount. Twelve shells, it was not enough but maybe enough to pull a distraction. He also counted his cans of ‘Bonk!’ and found only five. “At least the bat I had saved my life,” he muttered. “Might as well see if I can grab it and go.”

He peered around the corner, and saw Bear looking in the opposite direction. “Shit!” he yelled, and instantly closed his mouth. He pulled his back towards the wall to hide and held his breath to hear if Bear moved.

Dink… Dink… Dink…

Richard silently placed a couple of shells into his Force-A-Nature. He looked around the corner, and his eyes widened when the Bear had disappeared. Without a second thought, he ran down a hallway next to him and didn’t stop until he had reached a door. He pushed it open, and found that he was outside. He fell to his knees, and gasped for air.

Dink… Dink… Dink…

Richard held his breath again, and heard that Bear was behind him. Out of the darkness of the hallway, it did a short chuckle that chilled his spine and bones. With fear as an adrenaline, he sprinted from the doorway and did a quick half-spin to face the bear.

Dink… Dink… Thunk…

“Wait… Did it just fall?” He muttered.

Richard raised his shotgun, and slowly walked towards the doorway. With every step, his footstep felt heavier and heavier. As he neared the doorway, he paused and pulled out a can of ‘Bonk!’ in case it was still alive. He slowly opened the door, and found the bear with a Kunai lodged deep into its back. Nearby lay François heavily panting for air.

“Hey kid,” He gasped. “Thought I’d let you to yourself? I was following you with a Dead Ringer for a long time, in case he hit me at that moment.”

“Are you sure he’s dead?” Richard said. “I don’t hear his announcement.”

“… I should make sure about that,” François stood up and leveled his Ambassador to Freddy’s head and pulled the trigger. “You should fire a couple of shots too just in case.”

Two shots rang into the air, “Already done.”

“Congratulations humans!” Discord’s voice said. “You won your games! Time for you to head back to wherever you’ve came from. The others are waiting.”

“I guess this is goodbye for now?” Richard asked.

“I guess so,” François replied. “See you later kid.”

In a flash, Richard teleported back into the lobby of the empty Brothel. With a sigh, he walked past the first hallways and up the stairs. He opened his room, and found Rainbow Dash sleeping on the bed, hugging the small plushie he had accidentally threw at her. As adorable he thought it looked, Richard needed to sleep badly.

The Bostonian hesitated to get into the bed, but decided that it was better he just went to sleep already. He slid between the sheets and made himself comfortable. Dash quickly enveloped Richard, leaving him to wonder why.

Dash snickered, “Everyone deserves a good cuddle,” she whispered. “Besides, this is just me getting back at you using the Soda Popper unfairly. So you’ll like this whether you like it or not.”

Richard was already asleep by the time she started talking.

Author's Note

Another chapter! Yay!
Does this mean more chapters in the future? Of course it does! Until I finish this by the way.
"Why is Chrysalis being a cyborg?" One asks.
I have a complete idea for her. Besides, she'll be epic as fuuuu...
"Why are the chapters really long now?"
Well, it would make sense to place one large chapter rather than two chapters based on one act/scene.
(On a side note, name all of the unnamed cosmetics! :D)

Will Fluttershy ever find out if the hat is real or not?
Is Dell truly in love?
What can you trade for with one ref?
Did Discord actually play the game, or did he send out real copies?
Will Solar Team claim all of Stalliongrad? Or will it fall to the hands of the Lunar Team?

These questions will be answered and more next time on
DRAGON FORTRESS TWO!!

"... Huh? ...It's not the title? ...Sorry, I meant
OF MERCENARIES AND PONIES!!!" (I thought the other seemed kind of catchy)

BoS Day Three;The reveal

Celestia sighed, and placed her teacup on a small table in front of her. Ever since the capture of the northern end of town, she felt stressed about actually capturing this large city. It was about the size of Manehatten if not more. The guards send her news after a recon group scouted the area in hopes of news.

A knock rang on the door. “Come in,” she replied.

“Hello your Highness,” A guard said, bowing.

“What is it?” She said taking a sip from her tea.

“I come bearing news that the team is taking over the next plot of land. But that was as of an hour ago.” He said.

“Which section of the city?”

“That would be the north half of downtown.”

She contemplated, “That part is filled with the middle class. If we could capture that section, then we could probably ask some of the markets to spare some food for the evacuated.” The guard cleared his throat. “Anything else you wanted to say?”

“We uh…” He faltered his words. “We didn’t exactly reach the city in time of the invasion. By the time we had entered the city, many had been captured by the changeling and some luckily escaped. We’re still finding families lost within the area we had claimed and some stragglers are still appearing to us.”

“…How could this happen so quickly? I thought we had guards in the city!” Celestia’s temper rose.

“About that,” the guard started. “Once we had reached the station, the guards that were on duty were slain. Many of my squad had to get out of the room before analyzing what happened.”

“Dammit!” Celestia yelled, startling the pony. “That bitch will pay,” She paused. “Sorry about that, but I’m assigning you to recon duty along with the new medic Flash in Stalliongrad. I think he’ll be a great asset to your team. You go and pack you things for your trip. Now if you don’t have anything else to mention, I’ll be going to my private study.”

“Actually,” the alicorn’s eyebrows rose at the guard. “We do have one thing to report.”

“Is it about Nightmare Moon?” She asked.

“No,” he replied. “It about Chrysalis… She has turned into what the Lunar Team calls a Mecha. She’s no longer her own. She now has a body of metal and is also breeding changelings similar to herself.”

“How?” She uttered.

“I was told that from Recon Team Noble 4, that it was the engineer that has done this; the one similar to our own.” He finished.

“... May my father help us all,” Celestia trailed off.

(……..)

“Yo guys!” Richard yelled. “There’s a mini-sentry by the point!”

“I think we get it already!” Twilight yelled back. “I’ll take care of it!”

The lavender alicorn ran around the corner, and swung her Tribalman’s Shiv at an oncoming Changeling Engineer. He yelped, and swung his golden wrench directly at her face. Twilight recoiled and placed a hoof right where he hit her. The changeling tried to stop the bleeding, but was finished with a spy backstabbing him in the back. He fell, revealing Rarity cleaning her knife on the creature’s clothing.

“You know, I never really liked their green blood,” Rarity said with disgust. “It just doesn’t look right.”

“Me too,” Twilight replied. “Also, can you help me with the mini-sentry nearby the capture point? I was told by Richard to take it out.”

“Oh darling I’ve already done that,” The unicorn replied. “This guy right here was looking for me once I had turned invisible.”

“It’s called cloaking,” the alicorn replied. “I already know how all the classes work. But we should go and capture the middle point. This is King of The Hill after all.”

“Congratulations Solar Team!” A nearby speaker said. “You’ve successfully defended the main point! Now please head back to the spawning rooms for your next round!”

Twilight waved her hoof at Nick once he had walked by. “Do you remember what this place was named after?”

“It was named after one of our areas called King,” he replied. “It was a newer place we had found back where I believe was China. Or was it Thailand? I really don’t know.”

“Oh, but what did the announcer call it? It was something like Northern Pass right?” She said. “Or was it Passing?”

“You got it wrong,” he said, motioning for the girls to walk with him. “The announcer said that this place is named Lockdown after a protest incident forced the guards to shut down this section of the city.”

“I remember about that incident,” Twilight muttered. “It was about having an independent government not ruled by Celestia. One of the pegasi in the crowd got drunk and threw a cocktail Molotov at a couple of patrolling guards. After that, according to reporters, it was a blurry and violet night. I think they were talking about the neon lights.”

“Twilight,” Rarity said. “The paper said it was bloody and violent night. I don’t know where you got those other two words.”

“I was really sleepy that morning,” she blushed. “By the way Nick, don’t you ever think that doing this job is maybe just a bit bad, even for your moral?”

“Yea I do,” The Australian said. “But it was decent pay and I made some good friends in the business, so there. Besides, I was a crocodile hunter and a koala keeper, which by the way are the most dangerous and deadliest animals out there!”

“That’s a load of bull!” Richard appeared next to Rarity. “Don’t listen to Nick; he’s just a big liar. Koalas are like small bears that only eat gum leaves.”

“Not only that,” Nick countered. “They also leave the meanest bite you can ever get and it could kill you!”

“Of course they’ll bite if you try and take a leaf right out of their mouth!” Richard jabbed his head with four fingers. “You’re such a dumb-nut, why did you even do that?”

“I- uhh,” He paused.

“That’s what I thought,” Richard finished. “Next time, don’t mess with an innocent animal unless you know what you’re doing.” He opened the door to the spawn room, revealing the rest of the team sitting on the benches.

“So do you know what you're doing?” Twilight asked.

“Of course I do!” The Bostonian said. “I always do, there’s no denying that! And if you question me just one bit, then you’re going have a bad time.”

“Hey Richard,” Jennifer yelled. “What’d I say about memes being your quotes?”

“Yea, yea, I know,” Richard waved a dismissive hand.

“So Richard, are you ready for round seven?” the pyro said. “It’s going to be the last one, from what I’ve heard from the other team.”

Rainbow Dash yawned, “It better be; I still got at least an hour of sleep left in me.”

“Of course I’m always ready!” Richard declared. “Just got to grab a couple of things first then I’ll be moving like a blur!” He started to mutter a song and did a small dance, leaving Nick and the rest of the group inside to wonder what.

“By the way Nick,” Fluttershy said from a bench. “Is that back plate you have actual crocodile skin?” The sentence ended in little more than just a whisper.

Nick chuckled as he placed the Danger Shield on his back. “It’s only as real as you make it.” He then grabbed a regular sniper rifle. “But that doesn’t mean it’s always what you want it to be.”

“So it’s, real?” she squeaked.

He placed a hat with a shining aura on his head and sat down on a bench. “Of course it is. Either that or this thing wouldn’t even protect me.”

Fluttershy’s eyes rolled to the back of her head, and fell backwards. Her friends rushed to the scene, and tried to get her to wake up.

“Why did you tell her it was a real crocodile’s hide?” Twilight scolded. “She’s an environmentalist!”

“Bah!” The soldier commented. “The hippy can just deal with it.”

The pegasus’ eyes slowly opened several minutes later. “I just had a nightmare; it was about somepony wearing another animal’s hide.”

Twilight bit her lip, “It’s okay. It was nothing, just a nightmare.”

“But it felt so real!” She exclaimed.

“Oh Fluttershy,” Arvin said. “Dreams can be real. Now get ready for the next match, as soon as you done.”

“Okay…” she trailed off.

Nick watched the scene, and decided that it was better not to mention it was real. He started to polish his gun and waited for the next announcement.

Richard placed his back to the wall, closed his eyes for a moment, and started to daydream. He walked in the dream, on a lush and vast plain with an occasional tree here and there. The Bostonian looked to his left, and saw his home; a two-story building in the Boston suburbs. With a sigh, he started to walked to the building, and slowly the lush grass transformed into a road and concrete. The area in front also started to turn, but it had changed into a cul de sac. The trees morphed into buildings next to his house and suddenly, he was back in the neighborhood.

A child’s laugh right behind him startled him and Richard turned. He found a small boy running away from another child holding a small bat. Richard smiled, and recognized the boy in front. It was one of his friends from way back and instantly remembered that day. He was seven, and his friend Charles was starting to pack their items to leave the place. Richard wiped a tear from his eye, and blinked.

Suddenly, he was back in his living room. As if nothing ever happened, Richard jumped to the couch and reclined his feet on the coffee stand. There was a knock on the door and he had ignored it.

Another knock at the door and Richard grunted while flipping channels on the TV. Another knock and a grunt later did he realize that something on the TV wasn’t right. He stopped on CNN and tried to read the date. He dropped his jaw and read the year again.

It was fifteen years after he had signed the contract. Richard stood up, went to the door, and opened it. He jumped back with a yelp, and found Rainbow Dash standing there with a smile on her face.

“You ready to go?” She said.

“Ready to go where?” He replied, scooting back slightly.

She giggled. “You know where. Let’s go! I’m pretty sure everyone else is missing you by now.” She stepped closer with every word.

The Bostonian fell to the ground on his back. “I-I… I’m out!” He opened his eyes, and instantly hit his head on the real Rainbow Dash’s head.

“Oww!” She said while rubbed her forehead. “Next time, warn me when you do that!”

“What were you doing,” he yelled looking around the room to no-one there. “And where is everybody?”

“They’ve already gone ahead and started the match; I was left here to protect you from nothing really.”

“Why didn’t you wake me up?” Richard asked while grabbing some ammo. “We could’ve already captured the point!”

“Actually,” she lowered her head. “They’ve already captured the point, and are now trying to defend the point.”

“So why didn’t you wake me?” He said.

“Because you were looking so peaceful sleeping,” Dash chuckled. “If anything, you were sleeping like a foal! Besides, you were also twitching a bit while sleeping, so I decided to watch you and wake you up in case of a Nightmare Moon attack.”

“What’s that?” he asked.

“It’s where the corruption of darkness,” The pegasus put a hoof on her chin. “Attacks you in your dream and gives you nightmares. Eventually, it'll find out what you desire and then corrupts you. Well, that how Nightmare Moon started.”

“You’re sure?” The scout asked. “It sounds dangerous.”

“Yea well, there’s a ton of dangerous things that could happen. If you add magic, then who knows what happens. Ask Twilight, she knows more about it than I do.”

“Sounds like she’s really smart,” Richard walked to the door. “By the way, we need to leave, the point needs defending.”

“I’m on it!” Dash ran out of the room with a Force-Of-Nature. “Smell you later!”

“Not today Skittles,” Richard yelled while in pursuit.

(….)

Spike pulled out his shovel, and landed on top of an enemy Scout. He started to swing at the top of the human’s head, and successfully killed him. He grunted a puff of smoke from his nostrils. He then pulled out his homemade Beggar’s Bazooka and launched himself away. The dragon glided with perfect air control and landed on top of an enemy sniper on the other side of the point. The changeling panicked, and tried to pull out his regular Kukri. He was too slow, and was rewarded with an iron shovel on top of the head. The creature fell limp, and Spike once again rocket-jumped himself away to another enemy. He glided, and found his next prey. Before he could hit the ground, the dragon gave himself another boost and launched himself directly at a Demoman.

But this time, the Demoman had seen the little dragon, and reacted. He launched a grenade, and pulled out his Eyelander. Spike launched another rocket, and it directly hit the Demoman. But he felt a small pain on his feet, and found that he was missing his left foot. “Medic!” He yelled.

Arvin looked back, and shot a bolt from his Crusader’s Crossbow. The bolt hit Spike on his temple, and his foot instantly regenerated. “Thanks!” He yelled.

“No problem!” Arvin replied.

Spike then launched himself again, and glided himself back towards the spawn room. He landed and entered the room and saw that Twilight was placing Nick’s hat on her head.

“You know Twilight,” He started. “Stealing is bad and you should leave that alone.”

“Quiet!” She hissed. “I’m just going to use it for ten minutes.”

“You should just leave it alone,” Spike replied. “Even I know better.”

“Fine! I’ll use it just this once! Just don’t tell Nick about it,” the alicorn pleaded. “I’ll be sure to give you more gems next time if you don’t.”

Spike grinned, taking advantage of the situation. “If you give me some Refined Metal, then it’s a deal.”

Twilight cocked her head to the side. “What’s a Refined Metal? But anyways, it’s a deal!” She stuck out her hoof.

Spike shook it. “And I want it when we’re on break tomorrow.”

“Fine,” she replied.

“Nice to see that y’all are making deals whenever I’m not around.” A southern accent said.

“Don’t worry about it Applejack,” Twilight said. “I have it all under control!”

“Ya sure?” the farm pony replied. “Last time you said that, it turned out worse than it could’ve been.” She glared.

Twilight felt a bead of sweat run down her neck. “Oh don’t worry; I’m pretty sure this isn’t going to be as bad.” She had put on her best poker face.

Applejack chuckled. “I’m joshing’ ya. Besides, I need to place a teleporter right on the outside.”

The earth pony left the room with trot, leaving the two alone. “Alright Twilight, you keep your end of the deal and we’re good.” Spike said, leaving the spawn room.

“Oh I will,” She replied and pulled out her Mildly Menacing Killstreak Huntsman. Twilight walked out of the spawn room, and was met with a changeling pyro spewing fire directly at her. Twilight then used her magic to grab an arrow and stab the creature. It lodged into the abdomen, and the pyro clutched his stomach. Gunfire from behind the changeling ended his life quickly. The creature fell, revealing Richard on the other side, holding a Backscatter.

“Just thought you needed help,” Richard said. “Also, nice hat.”

“Thanks,” Twilight replied, and ran across a walkway. “Come on Richard, let’s go and defend this point!”

“Okay,” He followed the pony. “Also, be careful of spies, whenever you reach the other side. It feels like there is a lot of them this round.”

“Alright, thanks again,” She turned to the right, and got blood on her face just as when Spike exploded in front of her. She drew her bow, and aimed at whoever was on the other side. Just as she found out who it was, a screaming changeling Demoman charged at her with a broadsword. She released the arrow, and it hit the changeling in the center of its head. He fell, and then Twilight kept walking the way she was heading.

Richard jumped over her, and started to dash towards the point. He looked around— seeing no one, he started to dance on the point. Twilight walked up to him and watched the entrances. Rainbow Dash appeared, and saw nobody as well.

“It’s a little too quite here,” The alicorn stated. “It seems like nobody’s here.”

“That’s true,” Dash replied. “But I’m gonna go ahead and dance with Richard.” She stood on her hind legs and used the human as support.

A loud tone came from the speakers signaling the finish of the round. “Congratulations Solar Team!” Speaker Box yelled. “You’ve captured the point! We’ll be moving to the next area after our break!”

“I guess it’s about that time anyways,” Richard said. “Let’s go.”

(….)

Zecora placed a leaf into her miniature cauldron, and said some incantations. She stopped, and watched as her brew took a different colour; lime green, swirling with neon purple. The zebra chuckled, and then took the small pot and poured it into a large flask. Once filling it to the brim, she poured the rest onto the grass and placed a cap on the flask. Zecora then placed a label on the flask named ‘magic’. She finally placed the flask in her saddlebag and started to disassemble her small brewing set.

The zebra stood, and looked where she had poured the leftovers to. The grass had grown twice of its size and was adorned with multicoloured flowers. She frowned at a pale-blue flower, and decided to pick it. “No need to have a Poison Joke here,” she mumbled through her teeth. “It would ruin such a paradise in such good care.”

“You know, that could’ve been an idea to just leave it there,” Discord said. “I would’ve made great pranks with that flower.”

She pulled out a lighter borrowed from Jacques, and lit the flower. “Yea, but I’d rather burn these. They make great hallucinogens, mainly on the mind where it makes you relaxed.”

“Ooh!” he exclaimed. “You’re such a devil! I ought to do that sometimes.” Discord walked up to her, and placed another Poison Joke on the ground. “How about burning one,” another grew beside it. “Or maybe two more?”

“One is okay; two is enough for a group; and three? Discord, you’re talking about chaos. But then again, it should be fun doing this. We should get Chrysalis to join our park.” Zecora insisted.

“Me and Chrysalis go back a few decades,” the chimera said. “But it would be nice to talk to her again. Last I heard of her, she was being a cyborg.”

“I cannot confirm that this is true,” Zecora turned to look at the Solar Team, who was mingled with the Lunar Team. “But the two teams that are opponents happen to be such great friends.”

Discord sighed, “I thought these two really hated each other to the death, given the way how they fight on the field,” Discord watched as Richard did a backflip off a changeling.

“But these two teams just seem too happy.”

“Have you ever heard of Murphy’s Law?” Zecora said, covering her face with a gas mask and handed another to the chimera. Discord nodded. “Well, we’re going to do only one part of the things that can go wrong.”

“And the other parts, what are we going to do with them?” Discord’s asked with his voice muffled by the filter on the gas mask. “I’m pretty sure you have a plan for those.”

“Oh no,” Zecora shook her head. “One part of Murphy’s Law here will end in a battle like the field.”

“Should I still get Chrysalis?” Discord asked.

“Yep, we want as much fun as we want!”

“So, are you ever going to use that flask of magic?” The chimera asked scratching the zebra between the ears.

“Tomorrow, we need to talk about how we’re going to scare the teams.” Zecora said, “According to Tavish, tomorrow would be Halloween; similar to our Nightmare Moon celebration.”

“You mean…” He trailed off. “You mean I can give my best scare?”

“No Discord… You will be the best scare!” Zecora chuckled. “Now, what I want you to do is to place this burning flower nearby the group, but not close enough for them to notice what’s going on. Got it?”

Discord covered his ‘mouth’ to suppress his giggles. “Yep, this will be the greatest prank!”

“Of course it is!” a bubbly voice said. “What are we doing?”

“Pinkie!” Zecora said. “W-what are you doing here?”

“I heard something about pranks and I wanted to hear more!” The pink pony giggled.

“Well, don’t tell anyone else,” Discord scolded. “We want this to be the greatest surprise.”

“By the way, why are you guys wearing gas masks?” Pinkie asked. “Should I put mine on?”

“You should,” Zecora said and motioned her head towards the mass of people and ponies alike. “Commence Operation Bigfoot.”

Discord snapped his fingers, and appeared underneath a very close by table, and placed the burning flower there. He then teleported himself underneath another table, and placed on there. And finally, he placed the last unlit flower on Jane’s Burning Team Captain hat.

The soldier reacted, and tried to push the chimera to his side. Jane then placed an arm around Discord and did a pose. “This private here, is someone you should pay attention to!” He exclaimed and sniffed the air. “It smells really good! Who’s up for barbeque? And just for the hippy ponies, you’ll get veggie burgers!”

“We’re in!” the two human heavies yelled.

“Alright,” one of the Lunar pyro started. “But I get to start the fire.” The human drew out a ball of fire in his hand.

“Not on my watch!” Jennifer said. “I get to start the fire!”

“Hehe, in your dreams silly girl,” he chuckled.

“All of the scouts are in!” a changeling said. “That makes four of us!”

Soldier looked around, “Anyone else? Taking requests,” He nudged Dell. “Hey, can you program one of your dispensers to become a grill for me?”

“Yea I can,” the Texan grunted. “Just give me a minute.”

The engineer placed a toolbox down and it constructed itself into a Morgan Hale’s Cooking Grill—“There’s nothing better; maybe a George Foreman, but this will guarantee perfect BBQs always!” Dell placed another toolbox but it turned into a cooler instead. “Alright Applejack, if you have any cider or any Fizzy –plode it would be helpful to place in here.” Dell said.

“Okie Dokie!” Pinkie playfully saluted and reached into her saddlebag. She conjured up two six-pack bottles and placed them down. She then grabbed another two and kept going
until there were eleven packs. “There are extras in case everyone wants two!” The pony’s teeth gleamed in her grin.

“Thanks,” Jacques grabbed one straight from the pack. “But I don’t like mine cold, they’re better room temperature.”

“That’s disgusting!” the lunar human Scout said. “They’re better cold! Aren’t they Pyro?”

“It’s okay,” He replied. “I really don’t mind if it’s warm or cold. But I can say that I like my beer warm.”

“See!” François pointed at the male pyro. “I’m not the only one that like my ales warm Tavish!”

“I uhh….” He slurred. “I d’really ‘on’t care… you, you… person!” The Scotsman’s face fell to the table, snoring.

“And he’s out for the count!” Dash announced. “Looks like his bottle wins again,” She giggled. “I’m really hungry guys, anyone else?”

“Yea,” Fluttershy muttered. “But I think we should really thank Dell for doing this. Right Dell…” She trailed off.

“Eeyup!” Dell said. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be the one cooking Solly! Not anyone else! This will be the best Texan meal you’ll ever have in a long time!”

“At least it’s American,” he shrugged.

A flash nearby caught everyone attention, except for Dell and a couple others, and in its place was Queen Chrysalis, softly shining against the sun in her new formed body. A glossy look covered the cyborg, as though she had just gone through a fresh wax. Slivers of green metal hung from the top of her head, where a sheet of metal rested. Where the holes where located on her legs now comprised of small wires and tubing. The only thing left that was still visibly organic was the queen’s eyes and her middle abdomen. It’s a miracle that she is still operating her organic parts.

She coughed—fortunately a luxury to keep her original voice— and looked around. She gasped and saw the mass of people. Chrysalis grew an angry glare, but was softened when she found a couple of her team safely conversing with the Solar Team. She lifted her chin in dignity and walked towards the group.

She reached the table, completely unaware of the ponies, and sat down. “It appears that we made a truce, am I correct?” Chrysalis asked. “Or is this just a heated argument?”

“Nah,” Dell spoke from behind the grill. “It’s just a cook-out. If you want something to eat, then ask. We have enough drinks and food to feed another mouth.”

“Very well, so what bring us…” She pointed across the table. “You!” She growled. “What brings you here you damned pony?”

Twilight Sparkle stood from her seat. “Well, I’m actually a part of the Solar Team. And I was just enjoying my day, until you came.” She replied sternly. “I should just fight you here and now!” She jumped from her seat across the table and was about to punch the mecha, until Mikhail grabbed her and tightly held her in his arms. She struggled to get out, but gave up trying after it was made clear she wasn’t escaping the heavy weapons guy.

“You’re becoming like us too quick,” Nick commented. “Why can’t we just make you two become friends? Or something, then it’ll be easier.”

“I can’t!” the alicorn nearly shrieked. “She almost made me betray me best friends just for her. She almost made me kill them!” She struggled more, leaving the queen with a sinister grin.

“Let me at her!” Dash yelled from Richard’s arms. “I’ll be sure she can taste my fist!”

“I forgive you…” Fluttershy whispered. “But only the first time you tried to do this.”

“Guys,” Applejack spoke. “It’s in the past, but even I can’t forgive you partner.” She nodded at the changeling queen.

“So that settles it then,” Queen Chrysalis muttered. “I can’t be accepted by anyone pony. So how about it humans, what do you think of me?”

They looked at each other and shrugged. Dell handed her a bottle Fizzy, and popped the lid for her. “We really don’t care much about you, evil or not. But if you just happen to mess with us, then prepare to either team with the ponies, or apologize quickly.” Dell sneered. “But make yourself comfortable here; we humans aren’t going to kick you out just because of your past. But if the ponies have a problem, they can just deal with it. So are you vegetarian or carnivore?”

“I-uh,” she said shockingly, never being accepted like this without fuss. “I’ll take some meat if you will.”

“Suit yourself,” Dell shrugged, and placed a few small slabs of meat on the sizzling grate of the grill. “The first ones will be done in about a minute or two. Everybody will be served around the same time, so no one is discriminated because species.”

Richard opened a can of Crit-a-Cola and took a sip. “Yea, well I don’t want to end up having a vegetarian burger just because Skittles here can’t stomach it.”

“I can too!” She replied, giving a slug to his arm. “In fact, instead of a hay-burger, I’ll take a hamburger! So yea, deal with it humans!”

Nick laughed. “I hope that Discord guy can provide an outhouse just in case.”

“Gotcha covered,” the chimera said behind the Dell with a mask on. With a look to make sure the coast was clear, we flew towards Zecora and whispered. “Why isn’t the flower smoke working on these people?”

“I have no idea,” she whispered back. “But as you can already tell, I have my gas mask off but close by just in case it actually starts affecting these people.”

“I don’t know, but shouldn’t the ponies start hallucinating?”

“The effects should’ve happened once Chrysalis appeared. Maybe the air is just too clean for this prank. Let’s do this once we get back to Ponyville just in case it actually works.” The zebra explained.

Zecora trotted up next to Jane and sat next to him. With a grunt, the soldier scooted over a bit to give her room. Without a pause, Zecora reached into his saddlebags and pulled a very large book. Jane watched as she pulled it out, and started to drink his cola more frantically. She opened it, and turned it to a random page. With a hoof following her words as she read, Zecora spoke aloud and a small puff of smoke came from the grill once she finished.

Jane Doe wiped his forehead, pretended to ignore what was happening. He tried not to panic, but his endurance failed him. With a yell at the top his lungs, he pointed to Zecora, “She’s got a book! It’s a magic book!”

Just like instinct, all of the human mercenaries suddenly jumped from their seats and scrambled to get away from the zebra. With confused looks, the ponies watched as they pulled out a weapon and cowered behind each other, trying the push the heavies up front. Dell cowered behind his grill and took a peek towards her.

The zebra placed the enchantment book back into her saddlebag and apologized. “Sorry guys, I forgot it was so close to Allhallows Eve. By the way, I have cursed metal if anyone wants to trade.”

Like moths to a light, the mercenaries swarmed around the zebra, all making trade offers and bearing their unusual hats. Zecora felt overwhelmed and decided that this was a worse idea than the book itself. “I was just kidding! I really don’t want to trade. So please, leave me alone.” The humans groaned and the left the zebra to her business.

Chrysalis stared at her bottle, and watched as the bubbles went to the top in her orange drink. “What is this sorcery?” she asked.

“It’s called carbonation,” Twilight replied. Chrysalis opened her mouth to speak, but she raised her hoof. “I’m sorry, I judged you too quickly. Is it possible that could be friends? If not, then I understand.”

The changeling stared at her, and put a hoof to her chin. “I don’t what to say, but if you could back to me, then I’ll come up with an answer.”

“Really?” Twilight’s eyes twinkled. “Because I really want to know what exactly you guys are and there isn’t a book in my library that talks about your species at all!”

“Have you ever thought that maybe I don’t want to be recorded?” Chrysalis raised an eyebrow.

“I uh,” the lever alicorn pursed her lips. “I never did actually. I should bring my notebook next time we meet up. Would you mind if I wrote down things?”

“I’ll think about it,” she muttered. “I that Solar engineer is trying to tell us something.”

“…And the cheese is going to be on the table. Now, if I could everyone to stand in a line, this could get done easier. Applejack? Could you help me?” Dell announced with an opened Gibus hat as a megaphone.

“Sure thing partner!” The farm pony said and grabbed a plate with a burger on it. “Hey Dash! No cutting in line!”

“But I was just trying to tell Richard that cutting wasn’t right!” Rainbow Dash replied.

“Ah’m the element of Honesty, don’t lie to me,” Applejack said. “Now go to the back of the line and wait your turn.”

“It’s not fair that I get caught but not him. Applejack you dummy,” Dash muttered.

“What was that?”

“N-nothing!” Dash sped to the back and stood behind Tavish, who was still drunk.

(…..)

“Oh Celestia!” Spike moaned. “My stomach hurts!” He placed his sixth unfinished burger on his stomach, rising and falling with his breathing.

“Spike!” Twilight said, placing the burger on a nearby plate. “What’d I tell you about eating too much; you’ll end up being sick!”

“It was totally worth it!” He raised his fist to Richard and bumped it against his sleeping head. “Richard here thinks so!”

“Mom?” the scout moaned. “I told you I can do it! I told you I can eat those fifteen burgers! Look at me now!” he raised his arms into the air.

Twilight sighed and walked towards Chrysalis, who was lying on the grass holding her only organic bulging stomach. The queen barely moved when the pony reached her, and made a moan in acknowledgement.

“So, have you made your decision?” Twilight asked. “We only have ten minutes before we have to leave back home to prepare for tomorrow.”

Chrysalis let out a long sigh. “I guess,” she moaned. “I guess that I could be your friend. But on one condition!” Twilight nodded. “I get to have all of the ice cream you buy. It’s my new favorite.”

“That’s such a strange request, but I can agree to it.” Twilight stretched out her hoof. “So is it a deal?”

“Deal,” the queen took the hoof, and shook with what little energy she had. Instantly, Twilight felt a shock run though her body. She gasped, and Chrysalis laughed. “That’s the joke button I had installed in this new body. This cyborg-thingy business is fantastic!”

“How…” she trailed off. “How did you survive such a procedure?”

“Well, ask the Lunar Engineer,” Chrysalis rolled to her legs and stood, despite her moans of a full stomach. “He knows how to keep a supposed to be dead guy alive for at least fifteen years. The procedure lasted only ten minutes!”

“Really?” Twilight started. “I should look-“

“Everyone! Say your goodbyes and be ready to head back to your hotels! Leaving in one minute,” Discord announced. “Also, there’s a special treat for everyone tomorrow!”

“Twilight,” Chrysalis started.

“Yes?”

“I think we could make a fantastic friendship, me and you. We should get to know each other better.” The changeling said.

“Thanks! I’d like to know you better too! Well, see you later. Sweet dreams!” The alicorn waved her hoof and vanished in a soft light.

“See you later too,” Chrysalis muttered. “When you become mine to own you purple fool; Oh yes, you’ll become my greatest tool and you’ll never even know it.” She laughed loudly. The mercenaries turned around at the laughing changeling. She paused, and cleared her throat “Sorry, didn’t mean to laugh so loud. Just a joke I made up.”

“So what’s the joke?” François asked.

“It’s an okay joke, but here it goes,” The changeling lets out a deep sigh. “Ever wondered why the moon is round?”

“Sometimes,” he said. “Why?”

“Because It’s just the moon being fat, nothing special,” She replied. “Okay, it was funnier it my head. Besides, I was thinking more about your client.”

The spy chuckled. “I see what you mean,” He walked off, leaving the changeling by herself.

Chrysalis sighed and grinned. “That was a close one, now it’s time to start making a decent plan, starting with Twilight’s friends….”

Author's Note

I feel that I'm making the story go a bit too fast pace. But anyways, taste how my self-editing skills are!
In honour of Scream Fortress, I'm going to make a spooky chapter, totally canon but don't worry about nightmare fuel (C wat I did thar?)
Also, why is the theme of this year, the same as last year's? I don't quite know...
Anyways! Have a fun time, and... Discord why are clutching my leg?
"Because... :3"
Well, happy Nightmare Moon, or Halloween.
"I got him to say it! HUZZAH! EMERGIS EXMORTIS!!"
Wait! No, no, no, no- no!!! *KABOOOM!*

Discorasmus (BoS: Day four)

A deep black darkness filled the wood-smelling room. Suddenly, a door opened, lighting a small angle into the room. The door swung open, with a unicorn-shaped silhouette in the doorway. The head of the pony turned, and reached for the nearest light switch. The light flooded the room and revealed that it was a changeling at the doorway. The creature shrugged its shoulders, and walked in. It sighed, and headed straight towards a small shelf with collected books. Slowly, it pulled out one book after another and replacing them into their spots. The changeling did this through the rest of the shelf, and on another one. It stopped then pulled out a large novel. With a smile, it walked away from the shelf and exited the room. A few steps out, and suddenly a brown stallion stopped it in its tracks. The changeling gave a pleading grin, and revealed the book in its hooves.

The stallion read the cover and nodded, then motioned it to follow him. He stopped at a desk with a large, opened book, and written down a small note on an opened page. The changeling placed the book into its saddlebag and left the stallion to his business. Once it reached the door however, the stallion spoke.

“That book is due next week!” He said. “And Proxy, please be sure to bring it on time! You wouldn’t want that one pony that was here before to be mad at your overdue fines.”

“Don’t worry about it!” She replied with a smile at the current librarian. “I’ll be sure it’s back. Besides, I’ll just be reading this anyways. Not like I’ve nothing else to do!” With that, she opened the door to the busy midday of Ponyville. She chuckled, pulled out the book, and read the cover once again; ‘Attack on Gaea; Volume 15’. She giggled like a foal with a new Christmas present. Ever since having to stay at Rainbow Dash’s place, she went lurking into her room and found the first volume of the series behind a stash of magazines underneath the bed. Roxy replaced the book, and resumed to going home.

She trotted past a few stands and nearly collided with a group of ponies. With a quick sorry, she brushed past them and continued to walk. With a pause, she looked back, and saw that they were dressed as the main characters of her new favorite book. Complete with light metal armour, multiple sword holders with swords, small chains and hooks for grappling, and a mask resembling high ranking officer; these looked as close as the real thing within what the noble class calls ‘manga’. With a squee, she ran back towards the group and stared at the costumes with such happiness and light envy. The three ponies looked back at the changeling and smiled.

“You like our costume play suits? We’re wearing for the rest of the day for Nightmare Night.” The stallion said that designed to be the hero. He smiled back at Roxy. “To be honest, this guy suits me, even my brother here thinks differently.” He pointed to a short colt on his right.

“Oh yea right,” He replied. “You’re more like the guy’s brother, not me!”

“Oh please,” a mare replied on the other side of the stallion. “You’re younger than him, so it was by default that you were the brother.”

“But I die in volume ten!” the colt said. “That’s no fun!”

“At least you don’t have to fight fifteen Cronus in the next one!” The older brother spat then looked back at the changeling. “Say, have you read fifteen? I haven’t but I’m waiting for it to come out at the bookstore.”

“I just got this copy at the library,” Roxy replied, pulling out the book. “There were two others there.”

“Really?” The mare asked then turned to the stallion. “Race you there! I bet I’ll get it first!” She opened her wings and zoomed towards the tree.

“You go ahead; this armour is a little heavy for a unicorn like me.” The stallion replied. “I haven’t caught your name, err…”

“It’s Proxy,” The changeling blushed. “But my friends call me Roxy.”

“Nice,” He said. “My name is Leroy J., this little guy is my cousin, and his name is Button. That mare that sped away was my sister, Virtually.” He chuckled, and then analyzed her. “Are you an actual changeling; because that would be nice to talk to one,” Roxy slowly nodded in response. “Really? Wow! So you’re the one staying with the mercenaries?” She nodded again. “Tell me what you know about them, because I’m thinking about making a game with my sister that’ll blow the whole arcade business to shreds!”

“B-but!” Button muttered, tugging Leroy’s leg. “How will I be able to play Tran?”

“Believe me,” the stallion replied crouching down and placing a hoof on Button’s shoulder. “Believe me when I say that, you’ll be able to play Tran and a whole lot of other games once this bad boy I’m making gets sold!”

“What will you called it?” Roxy turned her head to one side.

“I’ll call it,” Leroy paused then put a hoof to his chin. “You know, I don’t know what to call it. How does Oculi sound?”

“Sounds great,” Button said ecstatically. “But what will it look like?”

“It will look like… You know, let’s just wait until it comes out okay?” He patted the colt’s head.

“Well,” Roxy shuffled her forelegs. “I got to head home, so that I can read this and make myself some food. It was nice seeing you three.”

“No problem!” the stallion smiled. “You’re going to be part of the festival right? If you are, then what are you going to dress up as?”

She smiled. “I’m going to be dressing as the Spy!”

“You mean Jacques?” Leroy’s mouth gaped. “That’ll be a great costume! Just add at small suit and a mask with a face painted on it.” He laughed. “It’ll be perfect for you since you’re a changeling; as a suggestion, don’t add the ski mask. It will look silly on you.”

“That’s true,” she turned. “I’ll see you later guy!” Roxy waved goodbye, and trotted home.

Roxy smiled, and muttered to herself. “I think this is the first time I’ve earned my love,” She squeed.

(……)

“Instantarium!” Richard yelled, looking into his spell book.

“What was that about?” Dash moaned from the bed. “Sound like you’re trying to do a spell like Twilight.”

“I am doing a spell,” He said with a green flame erupting from his hand. “It’s the teleportation spell I think. Anyways, I’m reciting these spells because it’s Halloween, and for the hell of it.”

“What’s a hell anyways?” Dash said, tucking herself deeper into the covers. “Besides, it’s seven in the morning; we got two hours left until we leave.”

“Just reciting in case I forget,” Richard said. “And Hell is a place where the damned go to. Like a bad place or something. They got other names, but I don’t care about it right now… Oh wait, I have to remember about Hell!”

“Why?”

“Because last year, we had to take somebody’s brother to Hell; the ironic thing was that the brother also wanted our boss to get sent to Hell too!” He rolled his eyes. “It wasn’t hard to do, but it was really annoying because skeletons, demons, and magic.”

“You guys have magic?” The pegasus raised from her bed. “I thought you were couldn’t”

“We could,” Richard flipped the page. “Oh! Here’s my favorite, Bapmo-bip Brondo!” he threw his hand out in a casting motion.

“What does that do?”

“I have no idea, but it’s fun to say.” Richard chuckled. “One annoying thing was the spinning wheel of death this guy named Merasmus made up. It was fun because both teams sometimes worked together against him, but annoying because some of the things on the wheel was just stupid, like death!”

“Death’s stupid?” Dash cocked her head. “I thought death was just a thought.”

“Oh he can be real, just as real as me touching the floor,” Richard closed the magazine and placed it on the nearby vanity. “Time to get my Halloween on; I’m so pumped!” He jogged in place and checked his pulse.

“Why are you pumped? It’s just a holiday,” Dash rubbed her eye, and rested her head on the pillow. “What day is it anyways?”

“October thirty-first,” Richard replied.

“… You mean Halloween is on Nightmare Night?” Dash bolted from her bed and ran to a hanging calendar. With a slow turn, she looked at Richard and shook her head. “No… This day is gonna be loads of bad!”

“No it’s not! It’s going to be fun!” Richard jumped in excitement. “Because I’m going to be zooming here and there with tons of spells!”

“Wait, does that mean I can also do spells?” the pony asked.

“Of course it does, everyone that has this book,” The scout lifted the magazine from the countertop. “Even you can do the spells that you can find whenever you kill someone that has a spell. Sometimes, you can find pages for a special unfilled book that you can get.”

“So where do I get these things? Like the book you got,” She asked, getting up from the bed. “I want some these things!”

Richard went to his bag and pulled out a small box. “Here,” he placed the box on Dash’s lap. “This is a loot crate, if you have a key,” He held up a Mann Co. Crate key. “Then anything that’s inside the box belongs to you. The Halloween items are things that you just randomly find while fighting. I found this weapon,” Richard pulled out Fan O’ War, “while fighting yesterday. Don’t know how Mann Co. items can still be found randomly, but it’s still possible.”

“So I can just go out and fight, but somehow I still find things?” Dash grabbed the small crate, and turned it around. “So where do I look whenever I think I find stuff?”

“You would usually look inside your locker, anything that you would find instantly goes in there,” Richard grabbed another crate and used the key to unlock it. He lifted the lid, and pulled out the item inside. With a gasp of excitement, he pulled out an Unusual Soldier’s Stash with a flaming effect. “Huh, I wonder how much this is worth.”

“I want a hat like that!” Dash said with a huge smile. “Think I could get an awesome hat like that?”

“How about this Bombing Run hat?” Richard asked, pulling out what looks like a helmet. “I never really liked this thing, but I’m pretty sure you could do something with it.”
“Good enough,” She placed it on her head. “And it fits too! Why does your head size fit me?”

“Don’t know,” He shrugged, “But what I do know is that maybe you should check your locker next time we’re at spawn. Also, tell the other ponies that they should check their lockers every now and then too!” He placed the hat into his bag and pulled out a comb. “I’m going to keep saying spells, and while I do that, you go and tell the others that we have a big day ahead of us!”

Dash grumbled, and slowly walked out of the room. “This day better be worth it too,” she said, closing the door. The pegasus walked next to door to Jane’s room, and found the American juggling rockets while Spike was sitting on the bed reading a comic. “Time to get ready, we have a big day.” She said in a monotone voice.

“Merasmus will get it this time!” The soldier yelled, “I’ll make sure he won’t escape from me!”

“And Spike,” Dash said, getting the dragon to look up from his comic. “Be sure to check your locker every now and then, you might have something in there.” He gave her a thumbs-up and started to place his Gunboats on. “And tell everyone else the same thing; to check their lockers.”

She closed the door, leaving the two rocket-jumpers to do their business. She then walked to the next door where Pinkie and Jennifer resided. The opened the wooden door, and found the pyros playing a card game. She gave them the message, and then closed the door.

Once reaching Jacques and Rarity’s room door, a scream came from behind the door. With a crash, Dash opened the door and suddenly, a pillow hit her on the face. The pegasus flailed against the fluffy object and fell on the ground. She struggled to regain control, and then stood. She looked at her assailant, and then looked at the bed. Dash gasped then giggled at the scene.

Jacques held a knife pointing at Rarity, protecting himself from the angry unicorn. He also held out his Dead Ringer; but before Rarity could throw something, Dash jumped in front of her spreading her forearms to stop her. Jacques gave a note of thanks, and closed the DR but kept his knife out just in case.

“I’m just here to tell you two that you should get ready,” Dash turned her gaze to Rarity. “Next time, tell me when this guy messes with you, I’ll deal with it.” She winked, and headed for the door. “By the way Rarity, you should check your locker every now and then.”

“What should I be looking for?” The unicorn asked, grabbing a towel from her bag.

“If it’s the locker I think you’re talking about,” the Frenchman started. “Then you should be looking for something inside of it at the spawn point.”

“How do I know which locker is mine?” Rarity used the towel to wipe her hair and coat. She looked at it, and grimaced when she saw that there was small hairs and light shaving cream on it.

“There’s a name and type of class on it,” He rubbed his face where he had shaved. “Also, your hair does a great job at being a towel.”

“You know, you could’ve asked me for a towel,” she growled.

Dash backed out of the room and sensing the tension, she then decided that she would better get out before it gets worse. She closed the door, and as if on cue, a bang on the door was heard and Rarity yelled, “I’ll be sure that you are never going to use the Dead Ringer again! Because once I’m through with you, everything of you will cease to exist!”

Dash backed away from the door, and entered her own room where Richard had thrown a teleporting spell in the same instant she opened the door. She moved out of the way of the dark cloud, and watched as Richard suddenly appeared behind her. He smiled, and closed the book. “You will not believe how much fun this is!”

“Can I try a spell?” She asked, reaching for the magazine.

“Nope!” Richard pulled it away. “But when you get one, I’ll teach you how to say the words. Okay?”

“Sure,” she mumbled. “Let’s go, I’m ready for the first match.”

“You better be,” Applejack said, from her bedroom door. “Because all of us are going to head over to the next place now, so let’s go.”

“What’s the next place called?” Dash grabbed a bat.

Arvin walked past the pony, carrying a napping Fluttershy on his shoulder. “The area we’re heading to is nicknamed Mayhem. Apparently, this place was the central entertainment section of the city, and it was named after a popular musical artist who liked to dress up like a shark.”

“How do you know all of this?” Twilight said, heading down the stairs. “It seems like it takes us a bit longer for us to know than you humans.”

“It’s because I have similar place used to be named the same way,” Mikhail said from the end of the hallway. “It was Stalingrad, but now it’s called Volgograd, bad history that name.”

“So, some of these events happened similarly back in your world?” the alicorn asked.

“Not exactly,” Arvin said. “Yes riots happened, but they weren’t really like these kinds of riots. But the reason why we mainly know was because of something that happened between our nations.” The German pointed at himself, then to the heavy. “But that’s history! Now if you don’t mind, I ought to get ready to practice medicine with Fluttershy.”

“What kind of medicine?”

Arvin roared with laughter. “The bloody one and the one that got my medical degree removed!” He then disappeared past the stairs, and left many skins crawling.

Mikhail leaned into Twilight’s ear, “He sometimes scares me with those things he say.”

“They’re just jokes right?” She chuckled nervously.

He patted the pony’s head, “I never heard him lie about his profession.” Twilight gulped.

(…...)

A booming laugh rang the air in the small room. “Tell me,” a voice said. “Is it really a holiday named Nightmare Night?”

Chrysalis walked up to the table, “Yes,” she said. “But I think something unnatural is about to happen.”

“What makes you think that?”

Chrysalis paused. “Because Discord is a part of this battle today,” She placed a hoof on the table. “And I believe that some other force is attending it today.”

“Oh?” A floodlight filled the entire room, revealing the corrupted alicorn Nightmare Moon. “What kind of force might this be? Is it magic?”

“I’m sensing magic, but it feels,” the changeling rubbed the back of her neck. “I don’t know, it feels wrong and shouldn’t even be able to exist.”

Nightmare Moon raised an eyebrow and put her elbows on the table, “You mean something similar to necromancy and the dark arts?”

Chrysalis nodded. “Then go and keep a watch on the battle, and send me a changeling whenever you notice something not of this world.” The alicorn continued. “If the force is here and not a part of Discord, then maybe I could harness that power and finally have a kingdom of my own!” She cleared her throat. “You can be my advisor or co-ruler. Either way, I’ll finally have my own kingdom!”

“What about Celestia, and the other two alicorns?” Chrysalis said. “Wouldn’t they be a problem in our plan?”

“You do make a fine point,” Nightmare Moon placed a hoof on the chin in thought. “I’ll take over Grayphon, it’ll be easier and especially since they are a bit more advanced than Equestria! Now join me in our evil laugh so that we can conclude this meeting.”

Chrysalis smiled. “Gladly,” She then took a breath of air, and started to laugh as demonically as she can. Nightmare Moon joined in and started to follow the flow of the laugh, ending when it had started to die out.

“I always wanted to feel like the stereotypical villain like in those recently popular manga books,” the alicorn spoke after a brief silence. “Now I know how it feels, and it feels great!”

“But…” Chrysalis started, but shook her head of the thoughts. “Never mind, I ought to leave now. Don’t want to be late.” She turned to head out the door.

“Yea,” Nightmare Moon said. “You go do that, and I’ll just sleep in this room.”

(…)

Twilight looked around the spawn room, looking for her so called locker. She made a gasp of recognition, and ran towards the tall metal locker. She looked closely at the labeled top and saw her name scrawled on piece of paper just above her eyelevel. She searched around the metal sheet, looking for a latch or something for her to open it with. She found a small combination lock holding a latch still. Twilight then used her magic to try and unlock it, but with no avail. She looked at Rarity, and used her magic to pull out a bobby pin that was at the back of the unicorn’s mane.

Twilight then conjured a screwdriver made out of magic, and inserted the bobby pin, fumbling around with the keyhole on the back of the lock. After attempting multiple times, she finally heard a click and forced open the lock. She pulled off the combination lock and flung open her locker door. Instantly, a couple of items flew out right at her, forcing her to jump back. The alicorn then looked at what attacked her and found small crates, a black hat with an open top, a couple of weapons that didn’t belong to her class, a hat that reminds her of a fedora, and a yellow bandanna.

“That’s a Professional’s Panama there mate,” Nick said. “The other one is a Master’s Yellow Belt, and that black hat ya got is a Ghostly Gibus.”

“What can I do with the rest of these weapons?” Twilight peered inside her locker, realizing that there were many more weapons not of her class. “And what about those? I can’t use those! I don’t know how to.”

“Then you use crafting to turn those into Refined Metal so that you can get more hats,” He suggested.

“But why hats? Why can’t I just get more weapons fit for my class?” She asked with a pout.

“You can get more weapons; it’s just that hats seem to be more popular. Besides, with refined metals, you can get strange weapons and possibly get a hat with a fancy effect on it.”

“Like your Shooter’s Sola Topi with the shine?” She asked, placing the Panama on her head.

“Yea,” He pulled it off from his belt. “This thing was the first thing I had gotten for an unusual hat.”

“So what can I do with a gibus? It seems pretty useless to me,” she placed it on her head, and searched for a nearby mirror. Finding a cracked one nearby Pinkie’s locker, she looked at herself. After several angle changes, she turned, and looked at the Australian. “This hat gives me a spooky look, but as scary as I thought it would be.”

“Here,” Nick handed her a box. “This is a cosmetic item, meaning just like your hat, it really does nothing except make you look better. But this item, it changes your entire look! It turns you into a zombie-like person.”

“What’s the name of it?”

“Haunted Voodoo Cursed Sniper Soul,” He said with a deep look in his eyes. “Believe me when I say, you’ll look dead when you put this on.”

“So, what do you want for it?” She went back to her locker. “I’ll give this hat and some weapons for it.”

He put a finger on his chin, and weighed his options. “Deal, just turn some of the useless weapons into scrap metal and make me a reclaimed metal then we got a deal.”

“Really?” Her eyes shone. “Where’s a crafting table so I can get it?”

Nick pointed to a worktable with various tools. “Just throw the items on the table and the rest will be done for you.”

Twilight cocked her head in confusion then decided to grab a few scout weapons. With her magic, she carried a Soda Popper and an Unarmed Combat. Once reaching the table, she threw the weapons to the table expecting nothing to happen. With a clank, the weapons suddenly turned into scrap pile, and just sat there. With a remarkable gasp, she ran back to her locker and threw several more weapons to the table, and eventually ended up with a pile of Reclaimed Metal. With an excited yes, she ran back to Nick sitting down on a nearby bench and presented the pile.

“Not bad,” he said and handed her the Sniper Soul. “A promise is a promise; you’ve earned it.” He then took the metal out of her grasp and threw it into his locker. “See ya on the battlefield.” He stood and walked towards Richard. “Hey mate, you still got that Aussie Sniper Rifle?”

“Yea I do, but do you got the stuff?” The scout replied.

Nick then placed forty-four golden crate keys and placed a couple of Refined Metals. “I’ll be taking that Strange Australium Sniper Rifle now.”

“Good, I really didn’t want to turn it into scrap.” Richard went to his locker, retrieved the golden rifle, and handed it to the sniper. “It’s official now?” He extended his hand.
“Yep!” the Australian shook the hand. “Now I’ve got what I’ve been saving forever!”

“Good for you. Now I’m so much richer,” the scout looked at his new pile of treasure. “And I have no idea what I’m going to do with this.”

Twilight walked up the Bostonian. ”Maybe you could donate a Refined Metal?” She winked, and gave her best seductive face—which was terrible by the way.

“You ponies are weird,” He said. “But yea, take it. Not like I have a use for it unless for trade.” Richard placed a Refined Metal gear on her horn and a metal slab on her back.

Twilight’s eyes gleamed, “Thanks for the charity.”

“No prob, just next time; don’t ever do that horrible face. No one likes a duck face.”

“Whoa dude!” Dash said from her locker. “What’s this shiny Scattergun about?”

Richard perked his head up, and turned around to see the pony. His mouth gaped, and slowly placed half of his keys into his pocket. His face slowly turned malicious as he mind came up with a new idea. “Hey Dashie,” he said with a singsong voice.

“Yea?” She replied, not taking her eyes off of the new weapon.

“Do you to trade for that? I got ten keys I’m willing to trade for you,” He persuaded.

“Really?” She gasped. “It’s a deal!” Dash threw her hand out in a greedy sense.

Richard was taken back then grew his stance again and placed the keys into her hoof. “Alright, no take backs.” His smile grew larger as his prize grew closer with every half-second.

“I don’t care, just give me the keys and I’m out!” She threw the Australium Scattergun into Richard’s arms. Dash then took each of her keys and decided to open her multitude of various crates. “I hope I get an unusual hat or something.”

“Just lost out on a more precious item you pony,” Richard muttered. “Really know your stuff before trade.” He then threw his other plain scattergun back into his locker where it’ll never be used again.

Laughter on the intercom caught everyone’s attention. Richard looked at the speaker, and did some quick thinking about how it belonged to. He slowly lifted his head, and turned to look at Jane Doe holding a Market Gardener with eyes as red as a blood sky.

A yell from the battle fanatic confirmed his suspicions, “Come on out Merasmus! I’ll be sure to make you look beautiful!”

“Oh Soldier,” the wizard’s voice could be heard coming from everywhere. “You were the worst roommate, and you’re just a civilian. Was that pity? No, I doubt it.”

“Magic is for sissies!” Jane yelled in no specific direction. “Go back to Canada where you belong! And where all magic belongs to!”

Merasmus laughed, shaking the building with vigorous vibration. “Let’s play a game shall we? I want to test my newest game; it’s called Strong Mann! You get a couple tickets, and we shall pay the next game!”

“O- o,” Pinkie raised a hoof. “Is the game hacky sack? Is it pinning the tail?” She gave a heavy gasp. “Is it dealing with magic?”

The disembodied voice let out a groan, “Is it has magic, but that’s irrelevant! So, let’s begin shall we?” Merasmus let out a maniacal laughter. With a warble and a pop, a few pumpkins had been placed around the spawn room giving the illusion of it being spooky. “You know what? Let’s add one more element to this ‘game’; let’s bring our old friend, the Spinning Wheel!” He laughed, then a pause. "Wait... Actually, I think I'll leave it at home. Soldier, don't ever touch it!"

Richard shrugged, and went to his locker and opened it. He dug deep into his pile of items that rested at the bottom, and with a smile of recognition, he pulled out a bottle of pills with the label ‘alien gene splicer’. He tore off the cap, tilted the mouth to his hand, and tapped the bottle until a multicoloured pill came out. With relaxed reach Richard opened a cooler filled with ‘Bonk!’ and opened a can. He then finally threw the pill into his mouth and swallowed it with a chug from the can.

Feeling refreshed, he then walked next to Rainbow Dash and patted her on the back. Taking her gaze off of her new unusual hat, she turned to her back and found a black creature wearing the scout’s clothing. Dash screamed, dropping the hat, and ran to the other side of the room. The pegasus reached behind herself for a weapon and came across Jennifer’s Scorch Shot. Without a second thought, she quickly pulled the gun and pointed it right at the scary creature’s eyeless face. Dash pulled the trigger with her wing and with a high pitched whistle, the ball of fire shot at the ‘scout’ and hit him straight in the chest.

He doubled over, and a hit on his back sent him completely to the floor. Rainbow Dash then swung a wrench again on Richard’s back and connected with him. Richard yelped and rolled over to get out of the way. With his fists raised, the Bostonian dropped to a boxing stance. The pegasus then lunged towards Richard with the wrench ready to swing. He braced himself for the next hit and waited. He slowly opened his eyes from nearly flinching, and saw Fluttershy standing in front of Dash.

Embarrassed, Dash slowly placed the wrench on a nearby bench and looked at the ground, rubbing her foreleg with nervousness. “Dash,” Fluttershy said with a soft motherly voice. “It’s a harmless creature; all he wanted to do was to say hi.”

“Yea b-but,” she stuttered. “He was about to kill me, and he killed Richard and stole his clothes.”

“Is this true?” Fluttershy glanced over her shoulder with cold look at the Bostonian. He started to chuckle softly and had soon burst into laughter.

“You should the look on your faces!” Richard laughed then pulled out the bottle of the pills. “This is only a cosmetic item! It’s a type of temporarily gene splice that just changes my DNA!” He clutched his stomach. “And to think that you three thought I was an actual Alien!”

Dash’s face grew hotter and her lips slowly parted to reveal her teeth. Fluttershy, catching the gesture, suddenly hugged the pony and clutched her tight. “Let me go Flutters!” Dash shrieked. “I’ll be sure he pays!” She struggled to escape the pony medic’s grasp; but with every second, the butter pegasus slowly tightened her grip, knowing that it’ll take a while for Dash to calm down.

“Will you two cut it?” Jacques said across the room. “We now got a bigger problem on our hands. We now got to worry about the Headless Horseless Horseman!”

“Who in tarnation has a name like that?” Applejack asked, landing an apple into her upturned hard hat. “Score, take that Pinkie!”

“He sounds like a scary person,” Pinkie said, tossing the apple like a basketball player. “AJ, I bet that I can make it if I go to the other side.”

“I’ll bet you five bits that you’ll miss,” the farm pony chuckled. “Also,” she grunted while watching Pinkie backing up. “This headless person, is it really headless? And why is it horseless?” Pinkie tossed the apple, and it landed with a thunk in the hat. Applejack pouted, and pulled out the lost bits. “I should’ve thought about this more.”

“Yes he’s headless and it’s replaced with a pumpkin,” Jacques pulled out a cigarette from his and stuck it into his mouth, not lighting it. “And since that he doesn’t have a horse, he runs around with a giant axe.”

The Demoman shoved Jacques away and pulled out an axe with several holes and a worn style. “This be the axe made from the Horseman’s scrap! I killed him with a blade that makes my patch glow with green fire!”

“The Eyelander you mean?” Zecora pulled out a flask with orange liquid in it labeled with an uppercase a without the center bar. She took a sip and sighed. “This person shouldn’t be too hard right?”

“He can be if you don’t pay attention,” Richard said from his side of the room protecting himself with a chair against a prismatic pony. “Also, the Horseman can re-assemble his body after dying.”

“How disgusting!” Rarity gagged. “What is it made out of? Dead things?”

“Actually mate,” Nick adjusted his sunglasses. “He is made out of a skeleton, and forms himself out of cemetery corpses.”

The mares in the room then made a simultaneous gagging sound, as though they had just seen dead animal. A few humans laughed, but Jane, Richard, and Nick just glared—well, if Richard could glare in his current condition— and went back to their own business.

“It’s almost time for the first round,” Arvin announced while lifting Fluttershy from her small session of eating candy. “Also, instead of just having the Horseman, we’re having Merasmus as our special guest. In fact, he’s our host!”

“Let me out!” Jane yelled, pounding the door to the arena with his Market Gardener. “I want to make sure he’s dead this time!”

The disembodied voice of Merasmus boomed around them. “Oh don’t worry; you’ll have your chance, after I’ve finished playing my game! Oh? You brought your guns? Good! You’ll need them to get your tickets to your game! In order to win this, you must win the game that comes after it.” A click came from the metallic, wide door leading out. “So let’s begin! Discord, will you do the honours?”

“My pleasure,” the chimera’s voice spoke. “It’s nothing personal ponies; it’s just that I wanted fun! Besides, I owe Merasmus some money and this was the only way to repay him.”

“But why!” Twilight pleaded. “How could you do this?”

“Oh please Princess Twilight,” He spoke with a sarcastic tone. “I’m just having my fun for the day. Besides, he’s leaving after today and he’s not going to take over. Now, we have twenty seconds left for the battle. Prepare yourselves, move those jelly legs, and let’s spin the wheel before we begin!” Discord then exploded with maniacal laughter and in the distance, lighting boomed.

“Come on… Big, head!” Merasmus giddily said. A loud chime rang and he declared the result. “You get a crit! You get a crit! Everyone gets a crit for thirty seconds!” He paused. “Wait… That’s not what I wanted!”

“Let’s begin shall we?” The giant metal door panel slide open, revealing the chimera standing with an éclair in his lion paw. “First of all, this éclair is fantastic! You all are going to get some after we’re done. Secondly, all your weapons will now be multiplied by ten for the next two minutes.”

Jane gasped then ran to his locker to retrieve his Beggar’s Bazooka. The other humans noticed, but didn’t really feel like running back just to get a better weapon. Spike followed his friendly American’s strategy and also grabbed his Beggar’s Bazooka, but decided that having his Escape Plan would be great. Spike chuckled at his now devilish smirk, and completed the picture by rubbing his hands together in a sinister fashion.

“Hey Twilight,” Spike said. “I have wings now, and I could prove it!”

“I believe you,” she replied.

“But, you’re not really going to check?” He asked with a hurt tone.

“Not right now Spike, I got more important matters to deal with.”

The purple dragon sighed, but felt a pat on his shoulder. “Private, I felt your pain. But that doesn’t mean you have to wear this lame excuse for a damned hat!” Jane growled, grabbing Spike’s Ghostly Gibus and throwing to the ground. He then slammed a Stout Shako on the dragon’s head. “You take this, and wear it with pride! Now let’s go and kick some commie ass!”

Spike cheered, and launched himself out of the door, and left the mercenaries. They shouted a war cry, and ran out, right into an area faintly lighted with a mammoth, full moon looming over the carnival-like battlefield. A few stopped, unsure with of the three passageways to go through. Although marked which direction goes where, they weren’t sure which direction to head to.

Richard ran down the hallway marked game, and nearly crashed into a few teammates before entering the arena-like area surrounded with various buildings of nightclubs and taverns. A large object stood in the middle; the Strong Mann machine, a colossal tower with a picture of buffed up Merasmus flexing and a hammer with blood—fresh and old—on its pad.

Richard examined the strange sight, and the surrounding area. Strange, he thought. It feels familiar, but there’s pony clubs everywhere here. So why is this carnival here? A yell from the other side alarmed him and he pulled out his scattergun in case of an attack by a soldier. Scout ran to his left, towards the entrance to the so-called tickets.

An opening to a sewer caught his attention. He turned to his back, and saw the lunar pyro looking back at him. With quick dash, Richard sprinted into the sewers, hoping to lose the pyromaniac. He turned at an elbow, and continued until he suddenly appeared in another area. The strange feeling of familiarity hit Richard once again. He shook his head and walked over to a sitting briefcase filled with papers and tickets.

“Never thought they would be actual tickets?” Dash’s voice spoke behind him.

“Not really, but with the magic dude, you could never really tell,” Richard replied. “Come on, we go to take this to the machine.”

“Not if I can help it,” She said.

“Wait, what do you-” He screamed in pain a knife plunged into his backside. “D’aw crap!”

François wiped his pinstripe suit down. “I was never really on your side. Thanks for the help.” The spy stepped over the now dead Bostonian and hurried towards an exit.
With a pop, Richard reappeared into the spawn room along with the original Rainbow Dash still rubbing her back, and Spike massaging his head. “What happened?” the Bostonian asked. “Did you get a head-bang?”

“No,” The dragon replaced his helmet. “I just got hit with a wrench on top of my head. I’ll be fine!” he scoffed. “Yea right, I might need to rest for a minute.”

“Whatever,” Richard waved a dismissive hand. He ran out the room, leaving a baby dragon, a prideful pegasus, and a pink pony lying on the ground.

Spike suddenly stood with renewed vigor. “I will take down that enemy engineer no matter what!” He pounded his chest and grabbed his Direct Hit. The dragon then grabbed his Market Gardener and stomped towards the door.

The door opened, and a draft of warm wind blasted into his face. Without a flinch, he walked to a passageway leading to the machine and slowly marched his way past several rushing teammates.

Twilight screamed about being on fire, but suddenly fell limp in front of Spike. He stared and clenched his fists harder. With pure hatred, he raised his launcher and shot a rocket straight at an oncoming pyro. The changeling tried to use his air compressor, but he was too late as he had run out of fuel. With a yelp, he exploded, leaving nothing but dismembered limbs.

Spike loosened his grip on his launcher, but his blood still pumped furiously. A crouch and jump later, he was in the air gliding around and shooting rockets at random enemies. Unsatisfied, he yelled a taunt at others, and scouted the area for his nemesis on top of a ledge facing the machine.

There! Nearby the red base, was the engineer hammering his sentry with the wrench used to injure Spike on the head. The dragon growled, and banged his head with the Gardner to test the strength of the weapon. Like a cannon-ball, Spike launched himself towards the engineer with such speed, that even the sentry couldn’t register him. Using this as an advantage, he shot a charged rocket from the Direct Hit. It flew and finally hit the Texan on the chest; he exploded, spewing blood and limbs everywhere.

Spike, now finally satisfied with his revenge kill, turned to face the sentry and prepared to die. But instead was met with Jacques sapping the sentry with a Sapper. “You’re lucky this time,” the Frenchman spoke, adjusting his tie. “But next time, you better be ready for anything.”

“Gotcha!” The baby dragon said with a thumbs-up.

“The tickets are almost delivered by the Solar Team!” Merasmus yelled. “By the way, why did you names change? I liked it better the old way. Anyways, here’s a spell! Mortis Lon-disconus!”

Suddenly, Spike felt a tug on his chest and was instantly teleported to the center of the map, he gasped; at the opposite side of the machine, the entire enemy team stood opposite from their own. The dragon tried to pull out his launcher, but instead his elbows bent at an angle, his hands in a claw like a talon, and without a will to his name, did a gesture of rocking back and forth like a doped zombie.

“What is happening?” Spike yelled at nobody in particular.

“What I can tell you is that, be ready to die in the next few seconds,” Richard replied behind him.

“Why?”

“Because an enemy Demoman has placed stickies right at our feet and he can’t detonate them until this spell Is over!” Richard paused. “Be ready to run in three…. two… one.”
Spike braced himself and then crouched-jumped for protection. Suddenly, an explosion happened at his feet and was launched away. Spike flew—unknowing that he was still alive and in air— straight up and unfurled himself after being suspended in mid-air. He looked around, and seeing the roofs of nearby buildings, Spike panicked and tried to predict his fall. But a certain rocket was heading straight towards him.

Spike screamed, and made a futile attempt to cover his face with his arms. He exploded was sent to back to spawn room.

Fluttershy gasped at the scene, and cringed when the dragon turned into mush. She prepped her Medigun, and perked her ears for any calls.

“Medic!” Big Macintosh yelled from behind a boulder.

“Coming!” She yelled. Fluttershy looked from her post, and tried to spot any enemies. A Changeling Scout caught her eye, and she grinned. The pegasus grabbed her Ubersaw and ran towards the Scout.

The changeling noticed the pony, and pulled out his Force-a-Nature. Fluttershy noticed the distinct gun, and ran even faster. She got close to his right and juked to her left, giving the changeling one wasted shell. He snarled, and switched to his gun to his left and aimed. Fluttershy grabbed the arm with a hoof and sent her saw into the shoulder joint. The changeling screamed for help, but instead gave out an incoherent message at she sent another jab into collarbone, silencing him.

A crackle from her backpack gave the signal that she was fully charged, and a tear rolled down her face. “You made me do this, I’m sorry,” the butter pegasus whispered and chuckled. She then hurried to Macintosh, who watched the whole spectacle with large, wide eyes.

“Remind me to not make you angry,” He said. “Also, now that you got charge, could you help me take out that sentry nest?”

Fluttershy peered around the rock and was met with rapid beeping, gunfire and a bundle of rockets. She jumped back behind the boulder and nodded her head at the work pony. “I think we can do it!” She flipped a switch on her backpack, and adjusted her gun. “Let’s go!”

Big Macintosh gave a war cry and ran out. Fluttershy immediately focused her beam on the stallion and walked right behind him, not wanting to be in the direct line of fire. The Engineer, realizing the ubercharge, tried to get out of his self-made trap and escape. A round hit the back of his knee, and he fell. The engineer yelled a curse and attempted to crawl out.

“Go back home and cry about it baby!” Big Mac yelled. “And be sure to take your toys too!” He turned his aim towards the level-three sentry, destroyed it, and the dispenser behind it.

Fluttershy checked her charge gauge, and saw that it was below twenty percent. She then tapped Macintosh on the shoulder and indicated that the charge was running out. He nodded, and looked around for other enemies before having to stop the gun from spinning.

Suddenly, a couple of small, red pods appeared before the heavy and Fluttershy pushed him forward, knocking him down. She squeaked, and exploded. “Fluttershy!” Macintosh yelled then turned to face the attacking grenadier. The demo-changeling smirked, and charged with a Tide Turner on one arm, and a long blade in her hooves.

Macintosh stood on his hind legs and balled his hooves. He then made an uppercut with his right, and missed, leaving the changeling enough time to bring down her blade. The red stallion watched the blade fall, felt the cold blade before going back to spawn.

“Ah-haha!” Merasmus’ voice laughed. “The tickets have been delivered! Prepare for you next challenge!”

Rainbow Dash smirked, “Bring it on chump!” She then felt a tug on her chest, and instantly teleported.

A blinding light later, the pegasus rubbed her eyes and looked around as her eyes adjusted to the dim light. A first noticed two colours—red and blue— in vertical stripes. A bump from behind her jolted her back to her senses. Dash tried to turn around, but then noticed she was strapped to a chair inside a capsule and checked what the wheel in front of her did—nothing. The colourful pony then felt a pad pressing against her back hoof and pressed it. The capsule jolted forward, Dash stopped pressing on the pad, and the capsule in response stopped. Another shove from a different capsule caught her attention and she stomped on the pad. She sped forward, and nearly drove off an edge until she accidentally turned the wheel. With a deep sigh, Rainbow Dash looked around, and saw that she was on a three by three grid platform with the same two colours at the stripes.

“So the rules are,” Discord’s echoed in the dome. “Go to the flashing square and push off the other team until only one team remains! Also, you have to watch out for the Headless Horseless Horseman. Wow that’s a mouthful!”

Dash gulped and felt a cold breath on her shoulder. The pony straightened her back, and slowly turned. A deep, evil chuckle erupted as she looked into the dark shadows, only lighted with a glowing pumpkin.

“Boo!” the mouth of the pumpkin moved and a blade from an axe swung down to the pegasus. Dash screamed and pushed the pedal until it nearly broke. An unsuspecting changeling turned to the scream, and was bumped off the platform into a dark abyss, screaming. She peered over the edge, and didn’t see the bottom. Fluttershy screamed on the other side of the platform and was cut short. Dash flinched and assumed she was caught by the floating pumpkin.

A flashing square before the pegasus had flashed white and she slowly drove to the square. She then looked to her left, and saw a swarm of similar capsules heading towards her. Suddenly, the square behind her—and the others¬— fell. It left her, four Lunar members, Pinkie, Tavish, and Jacques fighting for dominance of the small square.
Dash looked at her dashboard, and found a small button that said turbo. She grinned, and slowly aligned herself to a Lunar member—a Soldier—and waited for the perfect time. His car stopped nearby the edge with the enemy fazed. The pegasus then slammed the button—with such force that it nearly broke it—and rammed into the side of the soldier. He yelled, “You maggot! You’re gonna pay for that!” His voice trailed off in the abyss, and suddenly his car exploded.

Rainbow Dash flinched, and felt a bump on her car. She leaned on the edge, nearly falling until a square came back up from falling earlier, putting her aligned the ground. The prismatic pegasus then drove to different square, adjusting herself in the seat. Suddenly, a slam into her right side shoved her off the edge. Dash panicked, and tried to escape her car, but instead fell into the dark chasm.

The explosion of her car burned her into flames, and then, darkness.

(….)

Dash jolted her eyes open, and found that she was lying in her bed at the brothel beside Richard—who was sleeping and had multiple wrappers of chocolate and candy around him. She rubbed her head, and looked around some more to verify. A mug of frothy cider on her side of the bed confirmed that this was indeed the room. She sighed and decided that it was better that she’d better get some rest. Tomorrow was going to be confusing and busy.

The Final Day (BoS: Day Five)

“Queen Chrysalis,” Nightmare Moon spoke after taking a bite from a clover and cheese sandwich. “How is it that the new magical source just disappeared in an instant?”

“I don’t know your dark one,” Chrysalis grinned, she liked saying that; it gave the alicorn satisfaction that she was the villain and not supposedly Celestia. “But what I do know is that Discord had interfered with the battle yesterday along with the magical source. My spies told me that the source had some fetish with bombs and was a human male that did magic with his hands. They also told me that strange objects—that also allowed others to do magic—was dropped whenever one of the mercenaries was killed.”
“And this is relevant why?” The alicorn asked.

“It’s relevant because they had used this magic against each other and against the human necromancer, causing magical radiation. But the necromancer never died and therefore was never really killed,” Chrysalis felt a tap on her flank, notifying her of another spy giving her a report. “Excuse me dark one, I’m receiving another report from a spy.” The changeling queen walked out of the small, darkly decorated tent and out into the brightening sunrise. “What is it Grunt?”

“We have received word that during the middle of the night, several changelings on our team have been slaughtered. We haven’t seen who murdered them, but we assume that it was the Solar Team that did so.” The armoured changeling spoke. “Also, some of the Lunar Team has appeared waiting to talk to the corrupted alicorn. They say that it’s only for her however.”

“Fine, go inside and tell her that. If they need to talk to her personally, then it must be good.” Chrysalis walked away, leaving the smaller changeling to do his duty. Chrysalis walked to the edge of the camp, and watched as the sunrise rose over the skyscrapers and made the scattered pods with metallic larvae inside of them shine a bright emerald. She then watched as one of the pods split open as a newborn, fleshy, and dark grey changeling crawled out and yawned. The changeling then crawled and opened its eye slits, revealing cyan eyes with irises—a trait that no other changeling inherited other than one with a future ruler.

“Come here youngling,” Chrysalis coaxed. The small creature feebly walked to the mother and leaned against her foreleg. The queen then picked up the baby and pressed him against her breast. “You are going to become the future of our race. Al though you’re too young to understand, eventually you’ll learn why.” She cradled the little baby and cooed as he mumbled softly. “Only two more years until you’re full growth, and then you’ll be able to make your own colony and we’ll rule together as mother and son.”

The baby giggled, bringing warmth to the queen. Her eyes faintly watered as a nurse changeling appeared to take the newborn to the nursery. “Promise me that my official son gets to the nursery far from here. I don’t want him too close to the battlefield,” the nurse nodded, and opened her wings to fly.

“I’ll be sure he gets the best, does district thirteen sound good?” the female changeling spoke, adjusting the small package on her back for flight.

Chrysalis nodded, and wiped her eyes. “Now be gone, I don’t want you two to linger any longer; today is going to be really dangerous for anyone, including the peaceful.” The nurse then buzzed away as another changeling came and tapped her flank again. “What is it Grunt?”

“Rumors are spreading that the corrupted alicorn is plotting against us,” he spoke with a salute.

“And where did you hear this rumor?”

“One of the changelings was walking by the tent holding the alicorn, and listened to their conversation. He then told other to be ready for a betrayal and watch their backs because they have a cloaking spy.”

Chrysalis then looked behind her and searched for any faint distortion in the air. Seeing none, she then turned around and jumped in surprise; Grunt lay before her with an icicle in his back and his body was slowly turning into ice. The queen then looked around for the backstabbing spy and decided that running to her advisor was the better choice.

She reached the tent, and opened the flap to found her highly trusted advisor backstabbed. Chrysalis then ran towards the alicorn’s tent to figure if this is all true. On the way around her, several changelings—metallic and older versions—lay dead from backstabs with their partners looking for the murderous spy.

The queen reached the tent and forced open the tent. The alicorn chuckled as Chrysalis entered the tent. “I’m afraid that this is the end of the line for you Queen Chrysalis,” Nightmare Moon spoke with a sinister smile. “You should be proud that I at least kept you alive for this long.”

“Why would you do such a thing?” Chrysalis yelled in anger. “After all I’ve done to help protect you, you give me this?”

“My dear, don’t worry about it,” the alicorn spoke from her wingback chair. “If anything, I could’ve made you anything more, but you have refused my other offer and therefore I had planned this; the fall of your dynasty.”

“What do you mean I could’ve been more?” She asked. “It was just going to be a namesake! You remember that I have no room in heart for others, only myself and that’s final!”

“When I met you back when we were teenagers, I had a simple crush for you!” The alicorn stood in frustration. “Now I know that was just a simple lie now. We could’ve been much more, but now all I see is that you just care about your own damned self! I envied you!”

“Envied what exactly? That I had my own kingdom? That I starved nearly every single day after your banishment? Or did you envy the fact I could find love more than you?” Chrysalis bared her fangs. “Or are you just jealous that I am not dominated by a more publicly loved sister?”

Nightmare Moon lounged over the table and grabbed ahold of the changeling’s metallic neck. “Don’t ever speak of my sister being more loved!” she growled. “I am the one who made her more loved! I did all the dirty work while her snooty self just sat on the throne and took all the credit! I should be the one loved, not her!” the alicorn pressed harder against the changeling’s neck, squeezing the tubing systems. “My sister is just a spoiled brat and there’s nothing she can do to stop me! I’ll be sure that your death is neither swift nor painless!” Nightmare Moon then lifted the changeling’s neck with magic and carried her out of the tent to tall wooden post. Several changelings watched and attempted to take action while their queen was being attacked. The alicorn casted a force field around her, blocking out all of the attackers and forcing them to watch and attempt to enter.

François turned his head away from his murderous spree and to the commotion of the two immortals. He watched, and winced as the alicorn pinned the changeling queen to the wooden post with a nail to the back hooves; as if in crucifixion. Chrysalis screamed in pain as the steel nail grinded against her iron hooves. François then pulled out his Dead Ringer and slowly walked to the scene before him.

The evil alicorn smiled, and conjured a flat wooden board. She then placed the board behind Chrysalis’ shoulder blades and placed a nail at the center. Nightmare Moon then grabbed another nail and forced the changeling to spread out her arms in an unnatural fashion.

François grimaced as he recognized the fashion of torture that was going to happen. He then crouched and walked past the growing group of changelings around the field, and touched the dark bubble. The Frenchman then pressed his hand in, and entered. Another scream emancipated from Chrysalis as the second nail was making its way through the iron hoof.

The spy then raised his borrowed Bushwacka and aimed the weapon to the alicorn’s chink in the armour. Chrysalis saw the spy and assisted him in making it more powerful by placing a spell on the weapon. The alicorn stopped, and turned her head to what the changeling was staring at. Suddenly, pain erupted from her back and fell to the ground as the kukri was lodged into her back. She screamed and fell to the floor, releasing the force field spell and releasing the spell on the final nail—which was on fire.

Nightmare Moon then arched her back and attempted to keep screaming, but it came out as a croak. François backed away as a bright beam of light struck the corrupted alicorn from the sky. Dark swirls came from the alicorn and dissipated into the light. The colour of the alicorn’s coat grew a brighter blue as more of the darkness came from her. Slowly, as though being lifted from the stomach, Nightmare Moon rose towards the source of the light. But as quickly as it had appeared, the light stopped and the blue alicorn fell to the ground.

François studied the alicorn, and noticed that not only she had changed coat colour, she had also changed features of her mane and face; the alicorn looked younger, if not more attractive. She lay sleeping on the ground, with only a rock to comfort her. The Frenchman picked her up and held her in his arms. He then walked away from the cross of Chrysalis and headed out the camp.

With a small sleeping alicorn and the job he was assigned by her practically finished, what was he supposed to do? François thought, and decided that walking towards to the Brothel was probably the better option.

(….)

Well, at least it seemed like an idea that was good at the time.

As soon as the Frenchman appeared at the brothel, the white alicorn named Celestia was waiting for him at the lobby and took the young-looking pony to a room. François then was forced to sit and wait for his leader to come back. He twiddled with his butterfly knife and waited patiently for the alicorn to re-appear.

The small alicorn walked out, but there was a sense of energy around her, the kind you get from a young kid of thirteen. François then stood from his seat and bowed.

Confused, the blue alicorn then walked next to the spy and sat next to him. “We are so sorry about everything,” She spoke in an archaic tone. “But we believe it can be fixed.”

“What do you mean?” François said.

“We mean that the things we have attempted to accomplish against our sister. Thou art free from our—our sister and we—quarrel. Art thou happy?” The alicorn said, looking for a response. Seeing none, she continued. “We digress; thou can call us Princess Luna, it is our royal name, and it shall be.”

“Well, you might as well come with me,” François stood and adjusted his tie and suit. “You going to have to explain this to everyone else; and by that I mean the rest of your mercenaries that you’ve hired when you were Nightmare Moon.”

“We have hired mercenaries?” Luna replied. “For what reason do we have to do so?”

“You did so to play a ‘game’,” he quoted with his fingers, “Against your sister which happened to be the fight for Stalliongrad.”

“So we started the quarrel that also included the mercenaries, all for a game?” She asked, shocked. “Very well ape-creature; we shall go and apologize to the rest and figure out what to do next, especially since that we have free time to do so.” Luna stood and headed out the door. “Come creature, we have not much time; I fear that an old friend of mine may appear.”

“You mean Queen Chrysalis? The one you nearly crucified?” François opened the door, letting Luna walk through the door out of the whorehouse.

“We did that?” She continued walking. “We feel that anything we’ve done ever since the banishment has been forgotten.”

“Don’t worry,” François picked her up and put her on his back. “I’ll fill you in along the way.”

“Why art thou doing this?” She looked at the ground, and suddenly decided that staying on here is the better idea.

“You’re a young pony, so I’m assuming you need a piggyback ride so you won’t tire out once we get there.”

“Very well ape-creature, onward my gallant steed!” Luna shouted.

“Okay then, it all started back when we were in a town named Ponyville….”

(..)

“…And now we’re here.” Jacques finished, stopping at a hotel so unworn by battle. “So there, now you know how you’re sitting here getting a piggyback ride and me carrying you the whole way. Sound exciting doesn’t it?”

He paused, and looked over his shoulder. François smiled at the scene before him; a peacefully sleeping Luna on his back. He jumped lightly, awaking the pony from her slumber, “Where are we?”

“We’re at the hotel where the rest of the mercenaries are at. If you want to continue napping then just stay on my back and don’t worry about a thing.”

“Okay,” She rested her head on his right shoulder and softly snored.

He chuckled and entered the hotel. Once entering, he found Sniper napping with his hat covering his eyes and Jarvis the Scout messing around on his smartphone— most likely the casing part where he had installed a ball maze.

François cleared his throat, “Jarvis, can you get the rest of our team together? It appears we have a situation on our hands,” He pointed at the alicorn sleeping on his shoulder.

“Yea I got it,” he replied. “Also, that’s not a pony you just randomly adopted is it? Knowing you, you used to like that little kids show when it aired back in the eighty’s”

The Frenchman coughed, “No, it’s something bigger. To put it shortly, this is our boss.”

“No shit?” Sniper asked behind his hat. “I thought our boss was darker looking, bigger, and have a feel of evil around her. Are you sure this is our boss?”

“I’m sure, now get the rest of the team together so we can discuss about what we’re going to do about her,” François then gently lain the napping alicorn on a couch nearby. “If anything, we should be getting ready in case her partner gets here.”

“What do you mean? Did Chrysalis find out it was me that murdered them?” Sniper asked, grabbing the Bushwacka from the spy. “Because if she did then I might as well get this weapon sharpened.”

“No, but I think she’s assuming that since Princess Luna—our boss’ new name—has grown more weaker, it’ll be a great chance to attack.”

“Attack who now?” Engineer appeared with a Australium wrench.

“This little pony here,” Jacques pointed the sleeping pony.

“Well,” Jarvis appeared, giving the Frenchman a pat on the back. “I think everyone is here, Medic is waking up just now. It seems like the female changeling that had to sleep with him had sure given him a one-two.”

“Spare me the details you heathen,” Heavy said from behind Demoman.

“Alright then,” Jarvis said. “But what they exactly did is-“

“Scout, now not the time,” François placed a hand on his mouth. “If I can get everyone’s attention; this meeting is all about our boss, the little sleeping pony who’s sleeping here.”

The sudden attack of questions flooded the spy. He waved his hands to calm them down. “If you can calm down, I just want to say that yes it our boss, don’t deny it. And secondly, she’s really weak so we must protect her from any kind of harm. And finally, we must prepare in case of an attack by Chrysalis.”

“Why?” Demoman asked. “Did she find out about the betrayal?”

“Yes and no; she did find out that they were killed, but never found who though. The bug was also attacked by yours truly,” He pointed to Luna, “When she was Nightmare Moon.”

“So what do you mean when she was?” Medic raised his hand, and pulled up his pants with another.

“She’s now calls herself Princess Luna, and wants us to do the same. Any suggestions on what we should do?”

“I say we should just give the poor kid to her sister and she can handle it,” Jarvis shrugged.

“But what’s stopping from Chrysalis attacking the Solar Team?” Soldier said from the back. “We can’t just out the blame on them.”

“Shut up Solly!” Jarvis replied. “We can if we want.”

“Actually,” François said. “He does have a point; if they attack the Solar Team and defeat them, then who’s going to stop the changeling swarm from attacking Celestia when she’s only protecting Luna?”

“Are you saying we should team with those dweebs and help defend the swarm from attacking Canterlot?” Jarvis said curiously. “Because if that’s what we’re doing, then that’s either the stupidest idea you’ve ever made or the best one.”

“Don’t worry about it Scout,” Sniper placed a hand on his shoulder. “If we don’t make it, then at least we died in honour.”

“In pride!” Soldier saluted.

“In glory!” Heavy clenched his fists.

“In justice!” Pyro shook his phlogistinator above his head.

“And all the booze in the world!” Demoman shook his crate of rum above his head; silence. “What, got to have a drink sometime in your life.”

“Not now Demoman,” François held his hand out. “So the decision is final, we’ll team up with the Solar Team and help them defend against the upcoming swarm; any objections?”

“Yea,” Jarvis raised his hand. “Think they could give me a new hat? I’m starting to hate this burning milkman hat.”

(..)

“No,” Richard crossed his arms.

“Why not? I give you unusual milkman cap for your titanium pillar of hats,” Jarvis begged. “It’s not really that hard of a choice!”

“I know it’s not, that’s why I’m saying no.”

“Fine,” Jarvis walked away. “And don’t come begging for me to trade you milkman hat! I’m pretty sure you don’t even have the trade.”

“I do, it’s just that I don’t want to wear the hat,” Richard pulled out a bottle of Solar Beam fizzy soda and popped open the cap. “But you, you should just try and open a crate instead. It’ll be better for you.”

“Hey Lunar Scout!” Dash yelled. “I’ll take that hat and I’ll trade it for this Unusual Peace Team Captain. Also, I want you to give me the change for it also. It should be more than at least seventy buds.”

“Wow Skittles,” Richard patted her on the back and snatched the hat to place on his head. “Nice to know that you are learning fast when it comes to trading items. Also, I think that you’re taking advantage of him.”

She chuckled and whispered into his ear. “I am, but don’t tell anyone. I don’t want to have a bad reputation in my new profession.”

“Well,” he whispered back. “Make sure that it’s kept reasonable like right now, if it goes over at least one-hundred buds then you need to bring it down.”

“How does sixty-five buds sound?” Dash nudged his chest.

“It sounds great, but no more of that,” Richard pushed her slightly away, “Thing you were just doing to me.”

“What? Don’t like snuggles? Everyone else does.”

“I don’t,” Nick said, leaning in his chair grabbing the bottle from Richard’s hand. “Also, the Scout is trying to get your attention.”

“One minute!” Dash yelled. “But yea, why don’t you two like snuggles? They’re the best feeling you can get after a long bad day, especially with a lover!” She clasped her hands together and sighed in a dream-like trance.

“Who cares?” Jarvis appeared beside Richard. “Snuggles are great sometimes yea, but not all the time. I’m sure these two haven’t even properly taken at least one snuggle right. But I digress, I got at least seventy-five buds worth of keys and refined metals. Is now a good time to trade?”

“Yea, here,” Rainbow Dash snatched the hat from top of Richard’s head and placed it on top of the Jarvis’ head. He then in return tossed a bag that clinked when it landed in her hoof. “Also, you need to tell everyone else about how good of a trader I am!”

“By the way,” Richard rested an arm on Dash’s head. “Why are so passionate about snuggles?”

“Who said snuggles?” Fluttershy squee’d. “I love snuggles!” the newly ecstatic pegasus then stood next to Nick and jumped to his lap. The sniper moaned and rolled his eyes as she dug herself a comfortable pad.

Richard facepalmed, “Please tell me that not every single pony likes snuggles.”

“Well,” Fluttershy turned her head away and blushed, “Only the ponies that are couples, single, or adults.” She pressed the tips of her hooves together.

“That’s basically ninety percent of all of Equestria!” Dell commented as he walked by, carrying a white and yellow toolbox.

“Yea but, any idea who doesn’t like being snuggled?” Richard rubbed his arm, then his head. He then scratched his leg then his back. “Jesus Christ! I think one of you might have fleas!”

“Personally, I think it’s Fluttershy,” Dash joked. “I blame her pet bunny.”

“Angel doesn’t have fleas!” The butter pegasus replied defensively. “I make sure he stays clean and I make sure I’m flea-free.”

“Well,” Richard parted a patch of fur, revealing a small bug crawling on her skin. “That confirms it, you have fleas!” He jumped away, “Please tell your friends to leave and to not infest other people!”

“I’m for sure they won’t come to harm anyone,” Fluttershy spoke. “But they do need to leave.” She then leaned into her coat and whispered. A minute passed before Fluttershy spoke. “They left and decided that they’ll infest a changeling instead.”

“Don’t they know that most of the changelings are now cyborgs?”

“I doubt it, but I’d rather they found out themselves,” the normally shy pegasus said. “At least they left, that’s all that counts.”

“True,” Richard finished. Suddenly, Applejack and a Lunar Engineer came budging through the group. “What’s going on?” He said, getting out of the way.

“We need to prepare for oncoming attack of the changeling swarm!” Applejack said, running up the stairs to her room. “Jacques and François went to the camp and heard that they’re going to attack tomorrow at noon.”

“All of us need to prepare?” Nick asked. “If so, then I need to get my jars filled.” He brushed the pony lying on his lap off, and stood.

“So tomorrow’s the big official day for the final battle?” Dash took a sip from her bottle of soda. “And here I thought we were just going to have one final push for the city.”

François appeared with Luna on his shoulders and her head just peaking over the Frenchman’s head. “I and Jacques will escort this alicorn to Canterlot where we’ll help Celestia protect her.” He said. “Her sister is taking us, but the rest of you,” He addressed the group of scrambling humans and ponies. “You guys will get things set up for tomorrow. It’s only noon; so we need to hurry up and get moving! Let’s go, let’s go!”

(…)

“Hey Richard,” Dash whispered from her side of the bed. The moonlight shone into the window with the faint orange glow of a harvest moon. Dark shadows of scattered clouds covered some of the large moon, cutting it in half like a wedge plowing through.

“Yea skittles?”

“Do you think we’ll survive tomorrow?” The pegasus spoke in a hushed tone. “I’m legitimately scared, like I mean, so scared that you’re sure that you are scared.”

“So,” Richard reached for the lamp at his nightstand and pulled the cord. “What are you scared about?”

“I’m scared of actually dying. I’m not sure that tomorrow we’ll make it, the total defense I mean.” She sighed and rose. “I hate losing, but I don’t think we have a choice other than losing to them.”

“You mean that we might actually fail our duty tomorrow?” Richard grabbed the cup of water sitting next to him. He sipped, and seeing that the pegasus was on the verge of tears, he hugged her. “Don’t worry about it. Whatever happens; happens for a reason.”

“So what if we lose? Do we have a chance that it was supposed to happen?”

“It probably was, there might be someone that’ll help us leave it.” Richard held the pony closer. “At least you have a chance of saying your goodbyes.”

“You mean?” she trailed off. “You don’t know a way to get back?”

“I don’t, but maybe the pony that brought us here does.” Richard rubbed the top of her head. He chuckled. “Any confessions that you need to make before tomorrow happens?”

“A couple,” Rainbow Dash wiped a tear from her eye. “The first one is that; I’m actually a soft pony on the inside. But if you tell anyone that after I die and you’re still alive; I’ll be sure that you’re the first one I haunt!” She chuckled and softly punched his arm.

“So the second one is?”

“The second one is that I love you,” she said bluntly.

“Well shit,” Richard nodded. “I knew that one; you made it kind of obvious on the train ride here. Besides, your emotions are kind of hard to not notice. I see you blush sometimes, and I also see you lose concentration at times when I appear.”

The pegasus awed, “Am I that readable; because if I am, then I need to force up my game.”

“You are,” He rubbed her head again and scratched between her ears, getting a sigh of contentment. “But I still one problem I want to confess.”

“What?”

“I’m actually scared of rainbows.”

“…”

A minute of silence passed. It was so quiet that a mouse could be heard within the walls. Dash then smirked at this new information and was struggling to stop herself from laughing. “Go ahead,” Richard smiled. “You can laugh all about it.”

She suddenly roared with laughter, like an overflown river finally escaping a dam. Richard continued to smile at himself and shook his head. “You… You… ahaha!” She laughed, a tear falling from her eye. “My sides are hurting, oh Celestia! Ahaha!” Dash fell to the floor, rolling.

“Do I need to get Fluttershy here? Sounds like I need to,” Richard stood from his bed.

“No,” Dash wheezed. “I’m okay; just let me take a break.” She climbed back on top the bed, clutching her stomach. “So let me get this straight, you are scared of rainbows?” the scout nodded. “Huh, so no wonder you didn’t really like me in the beginning and avoided me.” She yawned. “All that laughing at your flank got me tired. Let’s get some sleep. I feel loads better after admitting that second one.”

“Yea, we better,” Richard then turned off his lamp and covered himself with the blankets. “You don’t even want to ask why?” he whispered.

“No, if you’re sleeping on the same bed as me then that means your fears are basically gone, right?” the multicoloured pegasus concluded.

“Your right; it is gone!” He gasped. “Thanks Skittles for helping me, uh¬-ish.”

“No problem,” Dash smirked in the darkness. “Also, call me Dashie; you’ve earned it,” A pause. “So can I be little spoon?”

“What?” Richard turned around on the bed, facing the pony. With begging eyes, she closed her hooves together and gave a pleading look. “Okay fine, if anyone finds us like this; I swear to the flying spaghetti monster that I’ll make it look like you drugged me.”

“Deal,” The pegasus scooted closer to the scout’s front side. “Could you please place your arm over me, I like that way,” Richard grunted. “Thanks,” she turned off her lamp and made herself comfortable for the night. “Good night,” she whispered.

With a grunt, Richard pulled his pillow closer to his head and slept.

Author's Note

This is the final day for the mercenaries!
Also, it may be known that yes I'm finishing the chapter in less three chapters from now.
So be prepared for whatever!!
On a side note, yea the chapter kind of started gruesome. Don't worry! No gore was actually included in the chapter, maybe loss of oil but that's it!
Hope you have a great holiday season!
No goodbye!
(Spookwagen is love, Spookwagen is life)

Playing With Danger, or doing the Rocket Jump Waltz

Flap flap….

Her mind flooded with thoughts, What if they get through their defenses?

Flap flap…

What if they’re not enough? Celestia thought as the pegasus guards continued to pull the chariot to their destination. She looked over her shoulder and saw another chariot containing her sister and two differently colored spies. Can these two humans do the job if the changelings break through?

Celestia lowered her head and sighed. They better be. They’re all I got before Queen Chrysalis possibly succeeds again against me.

“Hey pony princess,” François yelled from behind. Jacques nudged him in the arm, getting a ‘what’. “How much longer before we get into the city?” he asked.

Luna spoke from François’ back, “We are almost there; the power of the unicorns are growing. We also feel very tired, and thine back is becoming very unsatisfying.” She unlatched herself and leaped into Jacques’ arms, borrowing herself into the folds of the white, silk pinstripe suit. “This is better.”

Celestia rolled her eyes, and felt her chariot slowly decreasing in altitude as it descended to a landing pad just barely outside of the Canterlot Castle. The guards slowed their flight rhythm and glided unto the pad. Their hooves clacked, and the chariot’s wheels creaked, as they slowed to a halt. The alicorn princess stepped off of the passenger spot and walked to the other chariot.

“Welcome to Canterlot my little humans,” She licked her lips; it was weird to say that phrase. “I’ll take my sister to her room. Meanwhile, you two will talk to the Captain of the Royal Guard,” Shining Armour and an orange pony with a red cross on a helmet to the side of his head appeared and saluted. “You two will go to the embattle room with him and prepare in case the changeling swarm decides to flank.”

“One question,” Jacques placed Luna on Celestia’s back as she left the remaining group behind. “Why do we need a medic with us?” He then pointed to the orange stallion.

“I’ve been ordered to be next to Shining Armour here while he’s on duty by his wife,” The pony saluted.

“Yea, she uh,” Shining Armour rubbed the back of his head. “Ever since I saw your fight in Las Pegasus; my wife—Princess Mi Amour Cadenza, or Cadence —got worried that if I faint again, there might be nopony nearby to help me,” He patted the medic’s back. “She decided that placing Flash Sentry here as my advisor and go-to stallion would be a great idea.”

The Frenchmen shrugged it off, “Well, we should be getting ready I believe. I would hate to have to fight those cyborgs with nothing but sticks and stones.” François clapped his hands and headed towards the gate leading to the inner castle. “Who’s with me?”

Shining shrugged his shoulders and trotted to catch up with the speedy spy. “All of you three might as well follow me,” He turned his head and searched the area. Spotting a birch door, the stallion approached it with the small group following and opened it. Instantly, the wall torches lit up a short staircase leading up onto a room where two guards stood at attention, attempting to hide something.

“This is to the room filled with frequently updated maps of our castle and city,” he said nodding to the guards. “This is also the guards’ Friday poker room. But don’t tell Celestia about it, she doesn’t like the potential of the cards you humans brought.”

They snickered, “I blame our scout,” Jacques said as he put a hand on his chest. He then pulled out a stack of paper and shuffled them. “This is the original deck that we had made to pass the time. Although I wonder who caused the spread of such cards in this country.”

“My sister, Princess Twilight Sparkle, told me that it was a friend, Fluttershy, that told her,” Shining saluted the guarding ponies and entered the stone brick room. “But any source before Fluttershy has been lost because she doesn’t rightly know what it exactly was.”

“It was Richard’s fault for causing it,” white suited spy replaced the deck into his inner pocket and pulled out his silver cigarette case. “Is it okay if I smoke?”

Shining stared at case and then shook his head. “If that’s anything similar to a cigar, you can’t smoke. I’ve had several guards sent to infirmary because their lungs had failed on them.” Flash gave him a large scroll of paper and sat down on the table. “Anyways, back to the point at hand; the planning. First, we’ll evacuate the surrounding area then after that we can….”

(……..)

Dell kicked the door to a diner open, and placed his teleporter on the ground. He then hit it with his Jag a couple times to speed up the process and ran out into the crisp autumn air. Applejack watched as the human engineer rushed to get his teleporter ready from behind the diner counter. The farm pony sighed, and stared out of a window where a large and wide pathway had been carved as the city’s chokehold point.

“Hey AJ, can you get me more some more metal?” Dell yelled. “I need to upgrade this teleporter efficiently so that the other can get here fast enough.”

“Yea Ah got it!” She ran into the back of the diner and grabbed various sorts of metal objects that lay scattered. Applejack then ran next to Dell’s side and placed the metals at spots where it was being repaired, and assisted him.

“Hey sugar cube,” the earth pony spoke. “Ever think that this is going to work?” Applejack then returned to her spot behind the counter and grabbed two metals.

“This stronghold you mean?” He replied. The teleporter started to whirr, and the pony nodded. “Of course it’s going to work! We have enough guns to not worry about it.”

“But are you sure it’s enough?” She pressed the metals together and hammered it with her hooves, forming a faster reloading upgrade to any shotgun. “I mean, we can create upgrades to our weapons, but what if they don’t work?”

“Don’t be silly darling! We have guns, they don’t have guns; simple as that!” Dell spread his arms in pride. “If they did, they can’t get through our sentry nests!”

“But what if they had something to destroy just that? We don’t know all about them!” She walked close to the Texan and hugged him.

“Then that might be a problem,” His smile dropped as he dropped his wrench and pulled out his PDA. “I’m going to create a dispenser just so that we can have more metal for upgrades.” The teleporter made a loud ding, and revealed the Lunar Engineer holding another teleporter.

“We need more here pronto!” the engineer said. “If we don’t hurry up, they might be here before you two finish your scene.”

Applejack released her hold on the Texan and also pulled out her PDA. “I’m creating a dispenser so that we can hurry up.”

“Whoo!” Lunar Demoman appeared, holding a six-pack bottle of rum and wearing a pair of sunglasses. He looked around, and saw that everyone else was staring at him in annoyance. “What? I can’t have fun before fighting?”

Applejack slapped her hoof against her head and dropped her toolbox containing the dispenser, where it had started to materialize. Another ding sounded from the teleporter, revealing Zecora—also holding a bottle of rum— but swayed from side to side.

“I love this fantastic elixir, but I blame Tavish for giving this bottle to me,” She hiccupped. Zecora then stepped off the pad and stumbled to Applejack. The farm pony scrunched her nose and pulled her face away from the drunken zebra. “Also, you and Dell here make a fantastic couple! I can tell by the way he looks at you!” Applejack blushed and returned to work on her dispenser.

Several more minutes revealed nearly all the mercenaries in the diner, either sitting at a booth, or at the counter with the looted coffee from the kitchen. Heavy grunted, “Where’s Richard and rainbow pony?”

Big Macintosh set his mug down. “I worry about those two,” the stallion said. “They seem a bit too close if you ask me.”

“Maybe,” Jennifer placed her strange Scorch Shot on the table, and raised her hand to indicate Pinkie to get her a cup. “But honestly, I think they’re just late because no one even bothered to wake them up.”

“I thought you would,” Pinkie said from behind the counter. “You make all kinds of noise whenever we wake up.” She winked, and placed a cup of mocha on the table with a heart on the inside—the way she does with everyone’s cup.

“Oh haha,” She sarcastically replied. The pyro then playfully leveled the flare gun to the pony’s head. “Maybe next time remind me when I forget that my keys are inside my pocket. That way we wouldn’t have to fight about who broke the mirror.” She set the gun down and took a sip from her mug. “It’s been a little too long! They should be awake by now.”

The teleporter dinged and spun. Strands of particles floated up and created a sort of cloud. A cough from behind the cloud sounded and parted to reveal Richard waving the smoke out of his face. “Yo engie, I think your teleporter is broken!”

“That one was my work!” Dell growled. “How’d the hell did you break it?”

“Blame Skittles; she got mad at me for pushing her out of the way and decided that hitting the teleporter was a way to get quick revenge,” Richard pulled a comb from his pocket and combed his short, sooty hair. “She’s on her way, don’t worry.”

A ding from the other teleporter later revealed Rainbow Dash coughing up a storm. “You know Richard,” she coughed from the smoke. “You can be a real ass about this teleporter business.”

“Shut up,” the scout stepped off the teleporter and held out his hand. “You owe me fifteen bits for you losing that race.”

“Bull!” the pegasus shouted, putting her hoof on Richard’s chest. “You pushed me out of the way at the last second, I call cheating!” she crossed her forelegs.

“If anything,” Applejack separated the two. “If there weren’t any made rules, then it wasn’t cheating.”

“Ha!” Richard put a finger on Dash’s nose, almost getting bit right afterwards. “I told you it wasn’t cheating!” Dash pouted and grabbed her pouch of money from her secret pocket—which was right above the cutie mark, equivalent to a back pocket on humans— and ponied up the debt.

He snatched the bits and sat down next to Jennifer at the counter. “I’m surprised that you didn’t even rub it in her face,” She said, taking another sip from her drink.

“I was going to,” Richard asked Pinkie for a mug. “But she’s just a kid. I even bet she’s younger than me!” Pinkie placed a cup before the scout, with a partially broken heart on it.

Jennifer shrugged at the hidden gesture, and continued. “Anyways, rumor has it that you have the hots for her.” She chuckled.

“Who said that?” Richard lifted the mug to his mouth and blew to cool it down. “I really don’t have many feelings for the kid.” He admitted.

“But do you know how much it hurts her to know that?” Jennifer gave the Bostonian the container holding the sugar and also gave him a couple packets of creamer. “Do you even have self-respect?”

“I do! It’s just that I was thinking about someone else though,” He opened a packet of creamer and poured half of it into his drink. “Anyways, I think that we do have a defense to go for today.”

“That’s correct,” Dell said from his booth. “We have to survive the attack from the changeling swarm and that’s it!”

“So uh, where are we defending?” Dash muttered at the opposite side of the counter beside Fluttershy.

“Mainly here, but if you want to go ahead towards the beginning of the pathway, then be my guest,” Dell grabbed a slice of bacon and reached for his mug with the other hand. He then attempted to place the bacon in his mouth, but bit on rubber. He searched for the slice, but saw Mikhail softly giggling.

“Come! Take it back!” Heavy said behind the counter, waving the bacon.

Engineer shrugged, “Ah don’t mind, just ask next time.” He then put his paper bag into his overalls’ pocket and stood up and then climbed up top of his table. “Alright everybody, if I could have your attention, this will go a ton smoother!

Now, as you may know, we have to defend this chokehold against the oncoming swarm. Some of you have doubts that we can do this, very few of you are very calm about this—about one or two people. But to keep it short, we will defend this chokehold until all of us either fails, or they somehow make it through. If that happens, then who knows? So that’s it! I’m not like Jacques with his inspiring speeches, but close enough. See ya on the battlefield,” Dell stepped off the table and walked out of the door.

A cool breeze came through the door, forcing people awake and making them shiver. Dash climbed off of her stool and virtually dragged herself to the door. Richard watched her before getting off. He lifted his finger to say something, but stayed silent.

Jennifer nudged his arm, “So the choice is yours, either you make it up with the pony and have a happy relationship like Dell and Applejack; at least try to make her feel better but not really be in a relationship knowing that you two won’t be together; or you can do nothing and watch her slowly trudge on with her life. I’m not going to judge,” The pyro then grabbed her flare gun and placed her flamethrower over her shoulder. “I have another option for you, but you’ll have to find out how to get it.” She winked, but Richard had already changed his gaze towards the hurt pony.

So much pressure! He thought. Man, how did I get myself into this situation? He looked at his cup of coffee and saw swirls that branched off into hearts. I wonder if Pinkie put something in my drink. He searched for the pony, and found that she was staring back at him from outside. Yea, I blame the freaking pony.

“What’s the matter?” Jennifer patted his back. “Coffee’s too string for you?” She chuckled, “Come on, let’s go and sent some of those buggy changelings to the burn ward. After this, I’m pretty sure they need aloe Vera, because they got hit to the fourth degree—at least I think there’s a fourth degree. If not then there’s about to be one!” She laughed manically.

Richard smirked and shook his head, “You might as well stay behind with Pinkie, and I’ll be heading towards the front where Skittles, Lunar Engineer, and two others are staying. You’re going to be the second wall of defense along with a couple others right?” She nodded. “Alright, have fun then.”

“Don’t forget what I said good friend!” Jennifer waved and headed into a clothing shop where she’ll wait for ambush.

Richard then ran down the otherwise straight forward pathway. Eventually, he reached the near ending and found that it grew more infested with changeling waste, including broken pods of past hatched changelings—a few unhatched, but Richard decided that coming back later to retrieve them later would be a better decision; would be nice to raise one from birth. The scout then turned right and reached an opening and saw a large, dark green, and bulging mass peering in the distance. He gulped and looked for a spot to hide.

Rainbow Dash knocked her hoof against the sidewalk behind a roofed bus stop, getting his attention away from the mass. Richard then sped to her side and huddled behind her. A sentry beeped on the other side of the street, notifying that the engineer was ready.

All was quiet on the frontier, nothing but the sound of the sentry beeping; so quiet that a pebble could be thrown and be heard from almost any angle. Loud static on Richard’s headset got his attention, and decided to turn it down.

“Everybody,” Applejack’s voice could be heard through the crackle. “Listen, crrz, if you collect, crrz, changeling’s armor, then you, crrz, it back here for, crrz, upgrades. I repeat, crrz, back metal, crrz, for weapon upgrades, crrz.”

“I heard something on the headset,” Dash whispered. “Did she say collect changeling armour for weapon upgrades?” She scooted against the wall of the bus stop for comfort. “How can we upgrade these weapons? Isn’t it impossible?”

“Not really,” Richard placed a finger on his headset, getting more static. “I’m trying to connect again, but we’re just too far.” He turned the dial on the set, scanning on a different frequency. “I’m just getting more static.”

“Hey, aren’t the changeling cyborgs?” she asked, tuning her headset. “Shouldn’t the frequent-thingamabob work on them? It seems like this radio-ish stuff should work on them.”

“It’s more complicated than that,” the Bostonian turned the dial again; static. “Nope, but I’m running to the Lunar Engineer, he might have something to say.” He stood, and looked from behind the makeshift wall cover. Seeing nothing, he then ran across the littered street and to the source of the beeping sentry.

The engineer instantly pulled out his Lugermorph, but put back into his pocket once he noticed it was Richard. “What do you want?” He said gruffly.

“Since it was you that designed the changeling race basically,” the scout started. “Do you know if we can listen in on their conversations?”

“You can, but it’s on a specific frequency. The radio frequency is exactly two hundred. Anything lower or higher and you just get static. I’ve told the other engineers about this, and they’ve told everyone about a minute ago, but we’re too far so we have to assume,” the Lunar Engineer then placed a teleporter. “This is a two way teleporter so that we can go back and forth whenever we pick up metals. Also, for some odd reason, it’s spawning bread every time I use this teleporter. Tell Applejack about it. Also tell her to hurry up with the radio,” he pushed Richard into the pad. “See ya when you get back.”

Richard waved, and was instantly in the diner, where said farm pony was slamming two pieces of metal together. “They’ve already attacked? Or did you just come here to tell me something?” she asked, not looking up from her work.

“I’ve come to tell you that the teleporters are spawning bread and you should hurry up on fixing the radio strength,” Richard placed his Force-A-Nature on the table and some metal he grabbed from the ground. “I need the clip reload speed upgraded, if you can.”

Applejack stared at the weapon then tore it apart. She then took apart the lever that disconnects the barrel off, and replaced it with a button. The pony cut the center line between the two barrels off next and left two mirrored C’s. She then finally taped two shotgun shells together and reloaded the scattergun—this was all done in a matter of half-seconds.

“There you go! Your reload speed increased at least fifteen percent,” She handed the gun back. “And Ah’m programming the ammo you’re receiving from dispensers and the like to be at least taped together when you get them. You’re going to have to bring more metal for me to upgrade it more honey,” She coughed. “And the radio strength should be working at full power, so now everyone can hear me at least two miles around.”

“Alright!” Richard gave her a thumbs-up. “See you later; I think I’ll need you later eventually.”

“Bye!” Applejack waved her hoof at him as the teleporter took him away. She sighed, “Back to work on making more upgrades,” she muttered. “Need to make medicines for increased damage intake… Should it be steroids?”

(..)

Richard reappeared into the Lunar Engineer’s nest and peered out into the street; nothing again. “Hey Engie, do you know when they’re going to attack?” He asked.

“In about ten seconds,” the engineer lifted a toolbox and carried out into the sidewalk, covering the whole area. “They’re going to send the lowest of the low—a group of feral changelings that’ll try and leap at you with attacking teeth. Careful, they like to attack in groups.” The Lunar Engineer then lifted his hardhat, revealing a small in-ear receiver. He turned the small dial on the bud. “I hear that Applejack got my advice.”

“Yea she did,” Richard pulled out his scattergun then fine-tuned his headset.

“Crrz, be ready for attacking, changelings!” The queen’s voice could be heard. “Once the Feral leave, we’re sending the higher grunts, and so on so forth! Once we reach the Elites, be ready to go in nothing but brute force! We want to see them cower in terror as they see the swarm march out of Stalliongrad! Note that we’re marching, not flying because I want to see every single pony that crosses our path be trampled by our awesome glory!”

“My queen,” a random changeling’s voice spoke. “The area’s clear, though there happens to be a rogue sentry sitting in the middle of nowhere. Should we take great caution?”

“No, if there’s a rebel force gathering, be prepared to take them out!” She screamed, but stopped suddenly. “I sense the human changelings, the ones that had my weapon, out there. They are to be terminated at all costs! They’re not native of the hive mind, but you should sense them!”

Richard smirked, “If they’re going to attack me straight up,” he whispered. “Then let them bring it!” He yelled and ran into the street, giving out his position to the sentry changelings standing on the roof of a building nearby the large mass. “Come at me! All of you against me! I got this!”

“What in the buck are you doing?” Dash mouthed. “You’re going to ruin the plan!”

He winked; not getting her caught too, and released a shell into the mass, barely missing the sentries. “My queen, I believe we’ve found one of the humans. Should we go ahead and send out the Feral?” one of them asked.

“Very well, start the march!” Chrysalis roared, so loud that the headset wasn’t needed and even Applejack heard it from her stand behind the Diner.

She paused on her work and lowered her head to the microphone that was attached to the radio systems, “Like you’ve heard just now if you did, prepare for the swarm. I repeat, prepare for the swarm!” She yelled into the mike. “Let’s go, go, go!”

Richard aimed his scattergun right at the entrance to the mass and waited. A hiss from the inside raised the hairs on his back. Suddenly, like a moving, black wisp; red-eyed changelings charged from the entrance and straight at him. The Bostonian squealed a little but shot the other shell before having to reload.

A Feral was blown back, and crashed into other Ferals, causing instant confusion. Richard quickly reloaded, but was knocked to the ground as a Feral leaped into him and attempted to bite several times. He turned his head, trying to keep the hot breath of the Feral out, and pushing it away with all his might. The bug jumped away, but was instantly back again into trying to bite him as it leaped unto him. Richard then kneed the creature in the stomach, causing it to recoil, giving him more time to get up and retrieve his weapon.

A snarl behind him caught his attention, but a whistle of bullets cut it short. Richard looked behind, and saw the sentry gun working its business as it shot several more bullets and rockets at the enraging Ferals.

Rainbow Dash appeared to Richard’s side and shot a leaping Feral with her Shortstop. “Hey watch it scrub! I wouldn’t like it I had to save your lifeless body from a harvest for Ferals!” She hit another Feral down to the ground with an extremely large candy cane and continued until a small, green orb popped out. She then picked up with orb with curiosity and ate it. A gash on her side healed, and mended itself together.

“I need to kill more changelings, more often,” Dash sped away, throwing a bottle of Mad Milk. “Catch that you stupid bugs!”

A rocket flew right over his head, and exploded a Feral behind him. Richard looked up, and saw wo soldiers—Spike, and the Lunar— gliding across the sky and using a Market Gardener, except for Spike, who was holding a Half-Zatochi. Richard then pulled out his pistol and rapidly pulled the trigger. “Eat lead you fleas!” Richard yelled. “I’m pretty sure your mother is nothing but a roach!”

“Maggots!” the Lunar Soldier yelled, shooting a Feral’s head with his shotgun.

Spike then pulled out a bugle and played a long tone, giving them a feeling of renewed energy. Richard whooped and jumped over several Ferals—and hitting them in the process—as he ran towards the very front of the hoard, where several Feral Changelings had passed through the first defense.

Suddenly, Pinkie appeared holding her Phlogistinator from the roof a building at the front of the group, and pulled the trigger. The Ferals screamed as the harsh, orange beam of heat hit their fleshy exoskeleton, falling after a couple seconds. Pinkie kept holding the trigger as she ran towards the back of the group, making a clean sweep after doing so. Nothing remained of rogue group of Ferals except crackling, burning husks of black.

Pinkie threw her weapon into the air and cheered. She stopped, looked into the distance, and ran back into the building, awaiting her next group of victims.

Richard, horrified by the damage that the pony had done, turned back and ran to the front lines, where the hoard had dissolved to nothing but stragglers trying to escape into the buildings, but were shot on sight by the level three construct sentry and several mini-sentries—Applejack and Dell decided it was time to help and both placed one in the middle of the street.

Richard sighed, “Well, that was the first wave,” he threw his backpack down then opened a bottle of Gatorade. “We still have a lot more to go!”

“You might need to stock up on ammo over here,” the Lunar Engineer said, waving them over. “News had relayed to Chrysalis that Ferals didn’t make it far; she’s sending in the all of the Grunts next, once they get organized to go.”

“How hard can they be?” Dash stole Richard’s drink and chugged the rest. “It’s not like the Ferals were tiring at least.”

“The lower ranking ones should be easier,” the Texan replied, repairing his mini-sentry. “The worst ones are the higher ups; they know how to use the melee weapons.” He then pulled out a bottle of Red Shed —a type of beer—and popped the cap. “After the grunts should be the tanks, or some call, the brutes. They should be some of the hardest ones to take down behind the elite class, but shouldn’t be too hard.”

“Well, what are we waiting for?” Richard loaded a clip of taped shells into his scattergun. “It shouldn’t be too hard to deal with those grunts.”

“I need a medic,” Spike moaned as he crawled to the dispenser. “I’m missing a leg, but I guess this thing got it.”

“Stop your whining,” the Lunar Soldier said and picked him up. “I got your back.” He lain him on top of the construct and popped open another bottle of Red Shed.

Richard then searched into his bag, and pulled out his plasma pistol. “Heh, I forgot I had this thing.” He gripped the weapon and searched for a trigger. “How do I even use this?” He felt around for a lever of some sort.

“Where’d you even get that?” Dash reached for the weapon, but the Bostonian slapped her hoof away.

“I got it at a store back in Canterlot,” Richard then pushed a small button near where the trigger should be, and fired a small glowing glob at a window. “Holy crap!”

“Watch it!” the Lunar Engineer ducked. “Plasma is very dangerous!” The window sizzled at the glob melted the glass and was now trailing down to the ground.

“Well, at least I know how to use it now,” Richard checked his watch. “It should be about time to get ready for the next hoard.” He walked out of the beaten store and into the street and waited.

“Hey Rich,” Dash trotted next to him. “I think we might need to start picking up some of the metals, our weapons might be weak against the next group of changelings.”

He waved a dismissive hand, “Don’t worry about it! We got this!” He switched for his Atomizer and placed the pistol into his side pocket.

“Whatever you say dude,” Dash ran back to her bus stop coverage, and propped herself next to it.

Applejack sat at her diner, waiting for the metal to start coming. Suddenly, a crackle from behind caught her attention, and she looked back. Instantly, she saw a changeling smashing a box. The farm pony then pulled out her Widow Maker and fired a shot at it. It yelped in pain, and instantly tried to escape, but was shot down again by her.

“You piece of varmint!” Applejack yelled. The changeling lay dead before her hooves, with the shotgun aimed at the changeling.

Several moments later after confirming it was dead, Applejack then looked at the box it was smashing. She gasped, and read it again; Respawning Device. She then took it off the shelf and placed it on the counter before her.

“I hope no one dies out there…” she trailed off, unscrewing a screw. “Might as tell the team, would hate for them to wait forever.”

She reached for the microphone and turned on the radio button. “Attention! Everyone be on the alert! The respawn device is malfunctioning! Ah repeat, the respawn device is not working!”

Jennifer lowered her shotgun-sized Ignition Cannon and pressed her ear bud in deeper. “Looks like we’re going to have to use our ranged weapons Pinkie,” she said, counting the ammo in the cannon.

“Okie dokey!” She squeaked, switching for her Manmelt. “In case you do die and not go poof ever again, do you want me to tell him?”

“What?” Jennifer aimed her cannon down the street. “Go ahead, but tell it in the most dramatic way possible!” She chuckled.

“Like a scene from Titanic?” Pinkie giggled, and pressed the back of her hoof to her forehead. “Oh save me Jack! I’m so cold Jack. I’ve always loved you Jack, don’t ever leave me!” she mocked. “Hold me Jack! Don’t ever let go.”

“Oh haha,” the pyro replied sarcastically. “How about a cutting the time a little bit shorter, but still make it dramatic.”

“Hey, it was pretty good,” the pony lifted an eyebrow and smiled. She then embraced the human and held on. “You’re the best non-pony sister I’ve ever had.”

“Hey, I don’t even try,” Jennifer shrugged, hugging back the fluffy pony. “If anything, it just comes naturally.”

“Update!” Applejack yelled from the ear bud. “The respawn device is slightly working again! But instead, it takes at least thirty seconds to fully come back. So make it worthwhile!” the mike clicked.

“Should I still tell him in case you don’t?” Pinkie let go of her and crouched.

“You can,” Jennifer looked on the street, and saw a couple of differently dressed changelings running towards them. “I think we have our first customers!”

“Whoopee!” Pinkie jumped down from the perch on top of the building and landed on top of the Grunt, instantly killing it.

They turned their heads, pulled out small daggers from their holders, and attempted to stab the joyful pony. Pinkie pulled trigger on her Manmelt, setting the changeling on fire and scrambling to get it off. The others watched their ally burn, but a loud boom sounded from above, getting their attention.

They looked at the source, but didn’t have enough time to recognize what was happening as a huge wave of red light hit them. With an explosion, the beam hit the ground and dissipated into small balls, dissolving any changelings that were nearby.

“That was, awesome!” Jennifer shouted once the balls disappeared into the melting asphalt. She then jumped from the top of the building and landed next to Pinkie, who was gathering any metal that survived the ambush. “I should use this more often!”

“How much ammo can it contain though?” Pinkie checked her Manmelt and found it completely charged. “I’m pretty sure it’s like one shot.”

“It’s actually two per clip,” the pyro then threw an orange, cage-like orb into an opening in the weapon. “But I could only hold about ten clips, and holy shit that was awesome!”

The pink pony then turned her gaze to the front of the street, where the pathway curved to their direction. Spotting no-one, she started to run towards the diner. “I’m heading back, I need to up my weapon to cause more damage,” Pinkie looked over her shoulder at Jennifer. “Wanna come?”

“Yea, though I wonder why it was only us two to become the second wave of defense and not the third,” Jennifer said, pulling out her Powerjack. “I want to see if Applejack or Zecora has any temporary potions for more health.”

“She probably does,” she replied. “But like everything else on the market, it’s going to cost us some metal.” The pony then pulled out two scraps of metal. “This one’s named Damage, and another named Bigger Propane Tank.”

“That’s cute,” Jennifer turned a corner, and was met with the final defensive line. A red dot was shining in her head.

“Stop right there!” Nick yelled from the top of his sniper nest. “Are you changelings, or friend?”

“Hey Nick! Next time, remind me to burn your hat the next time I ever get my hands around your neck!” Jennifer growled. “I really don’t like it when you’re this paranoid.”

“I don’t either!” He lowered his gun. “But I just got to be sure about it!” Twilight then nudged his arm, and took his Bazaar Bargain from his arms.

“Thanks Twilight!” Pinkie waved. “Also make sure he just gets the bow and arrow as punishment!” She giggled.

“Will do!” the alicorn waved back.

Jennifer walked into the diner, and found Applejack desperately trying to upgrade Dash’s Shortstop. With several clinks, and a drill later, Applejack returned the weapon back to the pegasus. “Need an upgrade?” She said, watching Dash teleport back to her position. “You need to make it snappy though, Ah’m hearing from the chat feed that the higher Grunts are getting to our third line. If they get past them, it’s us next.”

“We both want damage increase and ammo capacity,” Jennifer slammed her weapon on the table.

“Consider it done,” Applejack then took the weapon and adjusted the pressure on the gas pipe, added a bigger flame spray, and strapped a larger gas tank on their backs. “Should be good enough, Ah’d hate to see the metal from the changelings being burned into nothing, but here you go!”

Jennifer took her weapon and pulled out her Powerjack, “I’ll see you later Applejack, hopefully sooner though.” She ran out of diner, and with the sledgehammer’s speed boost, Jennifer made it to the third defensive line, where a couple grunts, and even several larger, if not muscular, changelings getting shot by a team of Zecora, Big Mac, a sentry, Tavish, and the Lunar Pyro.

Jennifer chuckled, and slammed her Powerjack unto the head of an unsuspecting brutish creature, who’d fallen dead after such a hit. She then switched to her Backburner and started to spray her fire at the changelings. They screamed, but were silenced by the explosions of Zecora’s stickybombs.

“Kaboom!” She taunted. “That’ll teach you to mess with me!” the zebra ran towards the oncoming hoard with her Loose Cannon. “Come and get me! I’ll be waiting!”

A loud scream in the distance split the air, stopping everyone in their tracks, and focused on the source. Eventually, a loud trampling sound was growing louder.

“What is it?” Zecora said, loading her Loose Cannon.

A changeling laughed manically, “It’s the Elites! Oh you’re done for now humans!” His head exploded the next second as Big Macintosh punched him with his Fists of Steel —would it be Hooves of Steel? “You varmint shouldn’t deserve this, but you’ve earned it,” the stallion muttered.

“Yea, uh,” a smaller changeling spoke, cowering away from the group. “I don’t want to die, but can I just be a prisoner of war? I simply don’t-” He was cut off by a decapitation with Pinkie’s sharp Lollichop.

“Sorry, but please come back when you’re right in the noggin!” The pony laughed. The others stared at her as she finished. She shrugged, “What? He was a traitor for them, why should we trust him?”

“We could’ve gotten answers about things relating to why they are doing this,” the Lunar Pyro replied.

“Well sheesh,” Pinkie rolled her eyes. “It’s not my fault that I had to make a quick decision since the Elites are on their way.”

“Right, right,” Jennifer aimed her ignition cannon down the road and fired. “That should take care of some of them.” As if on cue, an explosion happened with several short screams as a result of the destruction.

“Well, could be a bit easier if we just went and fought them ourselves,” Tavish commented, reloading his grenade launcher.

“Yea, well tell that to the really colourful Elite standing ten feet away from us with a long sword,” the pyro pointed out. She then pulled out her flamethrower and pointed it at the changeling. “If you have any guts, then come at me bro!”

The changeling roared, and jumped into the air with the sword raised over his head. Jennifer watched as he came close to her; she scooted to her right, as felt the air whoosh as the sword came down beside her. The Elite growled and swung to his left, but it was deflected by the pyro’s Degreaser. Jennifer then swung the weapon to her right, knocking the sword out the changeling’s hooves and away from him. He then raised his hooves and swung to her face where it connected. Her head jerked, and she fell.

Pinkie gasped and pulled out her Phlogistinator, but Tavish stopped her as the human pyro stood up. The changeling attempted to make another swing, but was stopped by Jennifer’s kick to his face. He fell, and raised his head to meet with the attacker, but was met with the muffler of the Degreaser. He whimpered, and was sprayed with fire. The Elite then attempted to get up, but was kicked down again and died.

“Serves you right,” Jennifer said, releasing the trigger. “Next time, come with better weapons, and try to not punch my face.”

“Ah’m getting reports that the first two lines of defense had fallen,” Applejack said through the ear-piece. “A couple of the so-called elites have reached the final line. Ya’ll need to come by and get upgrades! It’s important!”

An explosion from beside Richard pushed him forward as he turned the corner and ran towards the group. “Yo incoming,” He yelled as an Elite jumped from behind him and missed his sword swing. The scout shrieked as the changeling nearly hit him from the back. “Can I get little help over here?”

“No problemo!” Pinkie said. She then ran towards the scout and pulled the trigger to her flamethrower. The changeling noticed the beam of heat, and jumped back. The pony then quickly pulled out her man-melt and shot him at the head.

“Gotcha!” she squeaked then pushed Richard towards the group. “Next time, be careful of big meanies like him,” She patted his head. “Where’s Dashie?”

“She got caught in the heat of the moment, was backstabbed by a changeling with two daggers,” Richard aimed his Force-a-Nature where he just came from. “Several Elites are running towards us with swords, there are actually hundreds coming out right now.”

“So why are there so many elites?” Tavish put two grenades into his Loch n’ Load. “Shouldn’t there be at least fifty?”

“I don’t know, but there are a lot of Ferals and grunts following them,” Richard ran to the corner, and was suddenly attacked by a feral as it came from the corner. He tried to push the mouth of the enraged changeling, but the strength of the attack proved to be too much for him as the creature went straight for his throat. The Feral then held on, but stopped, like it didn’t get what it wanted from the dead body.

“That bug is a vampire!” Zecora yelled, and launched a cannonball at the creature. It exploded as several more various ranking changelings ran out of the corner.

Big Macintosh then pulled out his Huo-long Heater and started to shoot at several changelings as a ring of fire surrounded him. A loud gunfire from behind them sounded when an Elite was suddenly covered in yellow liquid, who was shortly killed after Jane appeared.

“Screaming eagles,” He yelled, launching several rockets into the mass. He then landed next to Pinkie and pulled out his Righteous Bison. “My Bison is better than your dumb spunk shot of a gun!” He yelled at the party pony.

“Oh yea?” She jested then pulled out her Manmelt. “It’s a competition then! The one who gets the most with their weapon wins!” She shot a Feral that leaped at her. “That’s one!”

“Ha! I already got three, cupcake,” Soldier shot a grunt at the head and pumped the futuristic weapon. “Make it four!” Pinkie growled, and reloaded her weapon.

Meanwhile, on the roof beside a taller building next to the diner, Nick continued to shoot more changelings down with his Machina with Twilight nearby shooting with her Positively Inhumane Sydney Sleeper.

Bang!

“Nice shot mate,” Nick loaded another bullet into the chamber. “But watch this one.” He looked into the scope, found his next target, and pulled the trigger.

“That was nice, but it wasn’t like this one,” Twilight replied, looking into her scope. A Feral leaped towards Big Macintosh and opened his maw just for it to disappear into thin air.

“I’ll admit; bloody hell that was a remarkable!” Nick said, patting the alicorn on the back. “Let’s never enemies okay?”

Bang!

“Already ahead of you,” She said, loading a dart filled with Jarate instead of the regular bullet. “We might need to start shooting more bullets rather than picking them off one by one; the elites are pushing closer and closer, and it’s bugging me that the sentries ahead of us are giving all they got.”

Nick looked into his scope and saw an elite pointing in his general direction, “I think their mates saw us,” He said, looking behind him.

“Lock the door behind us, they can’t come up here,” Twilight shot another. “Also, spread those three bags of chips all around, it’ll be better that we’ll hear them.” A pause, she then turned her head around into the dim light. “Nick? Nick? Are you there?”

More silence followed, suddenly a Feral jumped from the door behind and leaped right at her. Twilight then used a spell to push it back and conjured a shield spell. She then pulled out her Jarate and threw the jar, coating the feral in harsh smelling urine, and unsheathed her Bushwacka. The Feral snarled, and blindly leaped at her, landing very close to her. Twilight swung the kukri and hit it on top of the head with the flat part—she really didn’t want to kill the creature, only knock it unconscious so that it doesn’t stain her homemade vest— and readied her blade for another creature. Seeing none with her light spell, she then grabbed the changeling and threw it out the window, almost landing on the Lunar Heavy Weapons Guy.

“What is that?” He said, looking at the changeling. Its head jerked, making Heavy react by punching the creature with his Killing Gloves of Boxing, finishing it off. “What that you?” He said, looking up at the alicorn.

“Sorry,” Twilight quickly apologized, opening a bag of chips. She walked to the door, peering out, and closed it. After quickly scattering the potato chips around the ground, she went back to her position and looked into the scope.

Big Macintosh was firing his minigun at the large hoard of changelings, and also having some catch on fire. He then pulled out his Sandvich and threw it at Fluttershy, who was standing behind him. She quickly grabbed the food and took a bite.

A hiss beside her forced the pony to drop the sandwich and pull out her Vitasaw to rebound the attacker. Fluttershy turned, and found an elite bringing down her sword at the medic. The pegasus covered her face with a forearm and prepped herself for death. A gargle above her caught her attention. She moved her arm to find the Elite pulling a glass dart out of her neck. Fluttershy then took the chance to attack, and jabbed the bonesaw into the creature’s stomach.

She squirmed from underneath the dying Elite and pulled out the Quick-Fix and went back to healing the stallion before her. Another loud gunfire perked her ears, but she shrugged it off as a sniper. A sharp pain erupted from her leg, and another from her back wings. She turned to see what it was, but it went dark before she even finished turning.

Twilight winced at the scene, but avenged her death with a shot. “Sorry Fluttershy,” the alicorn falteringly whispered. “I got your back next time.”

A snap of a chip caught her attention, and she turned with the Bushwacka in hand to find Nick standing with his Huntsman. “Whoa there mate,” he said. “I’m here to tell you that it would be better if we went downstairs and sniped. These changelings are becoming smarter and I think they’re getting worse.”

“Let’s go,” She turned towards the door, and ran down the stairs. She felt a tug, and suddenly felt an unbearable pain at her back. With a loud yelp, she looked down and found a black sword poking out of her stomach. Twilight looked around, and found Nick’s body sitting nearby with another holding a Machina.

“Sorry babe,” the Changeling Elite whispered in her ear. “It’s nothing too personal, just business.” He then flicked her cheek his forked tongue and pulled out the weapon.

As Twilight’s vision was slowly turning black, the Lunar Heavy appeared with his gloves crackling with dark blue electricity. He punched the changeling with his right, and swung an uppercut into the jaw. After the changeling fallen dead, The Heavy then rushed to her side, kneeling, and pulled out his Dalokohs Bar. After snapping off a piece, he placed the chocolate into her mouth and moved her jaw. Her eyes fluttered as she swallowed the measly piece. Energy quickly flowed through her as the healing properties did its work on her body.

“Medic!” He yelled. “Could you hurry?”

Arvin appeared, holding his Crusader’s Crossbow, and shot a bolt to the foreleg. He then rushed to her side with the Vaccinator healing her with a white aura. “Don’t you worry,” He said, patting her. “I’m here.”

“Why me?” She whimpered. “Why does everything wrong starts with me and my friends?”

“It wasn’t your fault this time,” Arvin scratched her head then moved his hand to the now healing injury. “You’re not dying today, not right now at least.”

An explosion from outside caught their attention. “Doctor, charge me once we’re out there,” Heavy said, standing up.

“Go! I’ll be sure our friend here gets to the dining car before anything else happens,” He picked up the little alicorn, and held her in his arms. “Let’s go.”

Heavy exited the building and instantly reeled his minigun. “Go!”

Arvin stood from the bloody spot and ran out of the building towards the small building. A changeling appeared in front of him, but was hit by Jane’s Bison. With a quick thank you, Arvin entered the cart and placed the pony on a seat at a booth.

“Now stay here with Applejack until you can get up and moving,” Arvin said pulling his Vaccinator out. “Oh I can’t wait!”

“Hold up partner!” Applejack barked, stopping the German in his tracks. “Why did you say ‘I can’t wait’?”

He chuckled, “Well, if I can wait,” Arvin smiled as he stood nearby the door out. “Then I would patient.” He ran out of the building and stood next to the Mikhail, charging him instead of the Lunar Heavy.

The farm pony and Twilight facehoofed, “Why’d you even ask?” the alicorn replied.

“Well, Ah didn’t know he was going to say that,” She said and looked outside to see more Elites than usual attacking. Applejack then pressed the button on microphone. “Attention! The Elites have reached the final standing point! Fall back to final line of defense! I repeat, fall back!” She yelled.

Dash ran into the diner and yelled back at the pony. “We still have a chance! It’s not over yet!”

“It’s an order! We must fall back! Those varmints are becoming too overwhelming!” Applejack slammed her hoof on the counter then pressed the button on the mike. “Hold this spot as long as you can! Ah’m setting the coordinates of our teleporter to take us to Canterlot! They shouldn’t reach us for about two days if they continue by hoofing it!” Applejack then released the button and pulled out her PDA.

“I’m not giving up! Not today of all days!” Dash yelled, and attempted to snatch the device from the earth pony’s hooves.

“Stop it Rainbow Dash!” Applejack growled, stopping the proud pegasus to a halt.

“I’m sorry,” Dash lowered her hooves. “I need a potion for upgraded speed.”

“No problem,” Applejack reached beneath the counter and placed the glowing red and navy blue potion on the counter. Dash placed a bundle of metal on the table and chugged the potion. “Now hurry! I need to work on coordinates.”

(….)

Jacques looked in his binoculars into the general direction of Stalliongrad; nothing but scattered trees, plains, and grasslands. He sighed, and switched from his binoculars to a telescope.

“Are you getting anything there my friend?” François patted his back. “I’m worried about our group.” He opened his case and grabbed a cigarette, then motioned Jacques for one.

The spy grabbed one and lit it with a Zippo. “I fear that something bad has happened,” He let out a jet of smoke.

“Hey, don’t worry about it friend,” François replied. “I’m pretty sure they’re doing fine.”

Loud clopping of hooves from behind them caught their attention, but kept facing the far horizon. “Sirs, you must listen to this!” a stallion guard spoke.

“What is it?” François turned to face the white pony.

“We got reports from towns outside of Stalliongrad that they’ve been ransacked by the Changeling Swarm! We have a prediction that by the speed they’re going, they’ll be here in approximately two hours. But that’s only if they’re walking. Have you seen anything in the distance?” He let out a breath.

“We’ve seen nothing on the horizon,” Jacques turned the telescope. He looked up from the scope, and stared. “Hey François, I think you may need see this.”

The Frenchman lightly pushed him over and looked into the scope. “Merde!” François turned to face the guard. “Get the first defenses ready! Looks like we have a fight on our hands; they’re flying and it doesn’t look like they’re stopping any moment now!”

The guard nodded and ran out of the observatory room and down to a flight of stairs. He hated having to run down these stairs—they’re steep and it’s a long run. After seven minutes of nothing but a rushing run, he finally reached the bottom of the flight where two other guards were patiently waiting.

“Relay to the rest of the guards that we have to prepare our first line of defense!” He yelled to the young stallions. “Tell them that they’re flying. I’ll take the princesses to the safe room, that way they’ll be protected. Let’s go!”

An alarm sounded as Jacques inhaled the bitter smell of cigarette smoke. “Where is our team?” He said, knocking the ashes from the burning stick.

“I believe that they were left behind in Stalliongrad,” François grabbed his cigarette from his mouth and looked at the glowing red, burning tobacco, slowly turning it as he spoke. “We didn’t fail my friend, not yet anyways.” He threw the cigarette out of the window and watched as it fell out of sight.

“Not religious myself, but hope that God will help us now,” the Frenchman said, walking away and heading down the stairs.

The black mass of changelings grew ever so closer as Jacques finished his now cigarette bud and chuckled. “As if God could help us now, we’re in a different world you know,” The spy muttered. “The best we got is the stupid work of Shining Armour and his too peaceful antics.”

He turned away and walked down the stairs before he heard the loud buzzing of the changelings.

(l.^.o.^.l)

“Oww..” Richard moaned in pain as his leg camped up. “Guys, don’t tell me that something went wrong,” A pause. “Guys?”

He looked around, and instantly recognized the area he was at; on top of Rainbow Dash’s bed. The Bostonian looked around the bed to find anybody else, but found no-one except him. At least that’s what he thought until a loud clacking sound came from the downstairs. Richard looked around for a weapon of some sort, but instead grabbed a lamp.

“Hydro-levitations,” the scout waved his hand and whispered as he stepped on the cloud below him. Richard then slowly stepped out of the room and looked around. Seeing nothing, he then walked towards the stairs and looked down; nothing. With the lamp in his hand, the Bostonian then peered around the corner into the living room, and then turned the other corner into the kitchen. He quietly gasped, and saw a changeling searching around the refrigerator. Richard yelled, and raised the lamp above himself as he charged at the now terrified changeling.

“Richard! It’s me, Roxy!” She screamed, covering her face with a wooden spoon.

He lowered the weapon, and stared at her. “What time and day is it?” He said, picking up the trembling bug.

“It’s fifteen minutes after noon, about thirty days after the Attack on Canterlot,” She nuzzled into his chest. “Everyone on your team thought you, Jennifer, Fluttershy, and Mikhail were dead, especially you.”

“Why?”

“Because you’ve been gone the longest; everyone appeared at Canterlot in time to find that the city was in near collapse and successfully defend it. Chrysalis was never found as they went on a scouting mission to see if you guys made it,” She looked into his eyes. “The others that were lost were found at odd places, like Mikhail was found at a brothel in Grayphon, Jennifer was found in a state of near death of dehydration nearby Saddle Arabia, and Fluttershy was found knocked out on top of Luna’s bed—though when we had woken her up, she thought she was still at the battlefield.”

She hugged him and whimpered, “I hear Dash crying for you almost all of nights, and Jennifer coming by to place flowers at your temporary grave after we’ve given up searching. I missed you so much!”

“Wow,” Richard sat down on the floor of the cloud home and propped himself against the fluffy wall. “But, what exactly happened that made this happen?”

“The Engineers thought for a long time about this,” Roxy wiped her pupil-less eyes. “The conclusion that they came up was that the overwhelming number of cyborg changelings were causing interference by some type of waves as last of the defensive group—you guys—were escaping in the diner.”

“Any side effects they mentioned that were affect me?” Richard hugged the changeling closer, despite the hard exoskeleton.

“Only that cinnamon bread will be latched to your skin,” Roxy pulled said slice of bread away from his back and took a bite. “And that you might be very tired for about ten minutes.”

Richard playfully yawned, “Alright, that’s down.” He sighed. “So where’s my temporary grave? I’m pretty sure seeing it will probably make me be happy.”

“Why? It’s supposed to mark something that had died.”

“I know, but I just wanted to see how popular and much they cared for me,” He patted her head, “And how my fans reacted to the news.”

Roxy pushed her hoof against his chest. “Your fans were really heartbroken; although most of them were mares that like the tough boy attitude and foals that liked the cool kid’s vibe,” she leaned in. “I’ll let you in on a little secret; Nick wept that he had lost a ‘professional’ friend.”

“What was Jacques reaction?”

“He cried a little, but François denied that he did cry at the make-up funeral,” Roxy stood up from his arms and walked towards the living room. “Let’s go, I believe that your grave is really an odd one compared to others. It still receives flowers every now and then.”

(…)

Richard landed on his headstone in his Archimedes form along with Roxy in her regular form, facing the headstone. With a hop, he jumped from the top and faced the engraving.

“Was born in nineteen-eighty five, died about a year after the new contract,” Richard read the engraving aloud. “We’ll miss him,” he smiled with the beak, but noticed scratching next to it, “Even though he was a hard head, from Jennifer.” He chirped.

“Nice to know that you’re loved from very good friends,” Roxy commented, looking around to see if anyone was nearby. “And that Jennifer girl is such a loyal friend.”

“I see; so what now?” Richard engulfed himself with green fire, and transformed himself back to regular form. “Would it be okay if I just walked like this?”

“If you want people to believe that you’re some kind of living dead, then fine by me,” Roxy walked away from the grave and towards the exit. “Might as well show everyone that you’re alive, it wouldn’t hurt to put a shock on everyone’s faces.”

“Do you know where my team is currently at?” Richard halted the changeling. “I would like to go see them.”

Roxy sighed. “They’re scattered between Ponyville, Canterlot, and Stalliongrad where they are retrieving changeling larvae and eggs to raise them as citizens and no longer enemies.” She scratched her head. “Pinkie’s in town, so we can go see her before we do anything else. How does that sound?”

Richard jogged from his grave to her side and picked her up to place her on his shoulders. “That’ll be good. Just let me give you a piggyback ride for fun.”

“Someone’s pretty happy today,” Roxy purred. “I blame the teleporter problem.”

“You will not believe how much of a confusion this situation is. Trust me when I say, this is not what I completely signed up for,” he chuckled as he stepped out of the Ponyville Cemetery, and headed towards Sugarcube Corner.

Author's Note

Yay!
You won't believe how long it took for me to finish this chapter, (despite how busy my supposedly lazy schedule is.)
So I wanted to give you this really long chapter. After making it about 9,980, I thought that making a exactly 10,000 words would be perfect. So enjoy!
I really didn't want to add the Righteous Bison (don't understand?), but the story wanted me to after I gave the Manmelt to Pinkie.

Gotta love the soundtracks from the game, and hail Spycrap.

I Looooove the Conga!! Wooooooo!

The weather on the forecast said ‘rainy’, but depression came over Rainbow Dash as used up most of her energy earlier to weep for the one she had loved. A cloud nudged her, as though it was alive wanted her to release the raindrops so it can cry with her. Dash grabbed the nimbus cloud and pushed to where it was above the Ponyville necropolis. She felt a tear roll down her check at she stopped, and decided not to remove it.

A high-squeaky yell caught her attention, and looked down to see Pinkie Pie waving at her, with a forced smile and apologetic look. Dash glided down, and hugged the usually happy pony.

“Why did he have to die?’ Dash whimpered, letting go of her pride and the tears.

“It’s okay,” Pinkie rubbed her back. “If he survived, there’s still a chance.”

“But what if he got stuck on the moon? What if he was robbed, and left for himself in Manehatten? What if he got into a fight in Minos? Or even worse; he was raped by Queen Chrysalis? Just please! Tell me what happened to him, you usually know everything!” Dash cried, hugging the party pony tighter.

“I don’t this time,” Pinkie said gloomily. “But I’ll Pinkie Promise you this; if we do find him—or at least his body,” Dash gave her a deadly glare. “We’ll give you at least ten minutes with him. Cross my heart, and hope to fly. Stick a cupcake in eye.”

“Thank you,” Dash said.

“No problemo!” The earth pony grinned, flashing her unusually white and shiny teeth. “Now let’s go to Sugarcube Corner and get us a cupcake huh? You’ll feel better and at least finish your job.”

“Alright,” the prismatic pony hovered into the air next to Pinkie. “Say, have you’ve heard this new Oculi thingamabob?” She sniffled.

“Yea,” Pinkie squee’d. “It’s one of the best things that a party person would have! You know what a video arcade game is right?” Dash nodded. “Well, imagine this as an arcade game booth, but you get to play it at home!”

The pegasus’ mouth opened in an ‘o’ shape as Pinkie explained it. “Can I play Hoof Fighter two?”

“Yea!” She grinned. “You can also play Tran and Insane Taxi!”

“Where can I get one?”

“I’m selling them,” Pinkie giggled. “I decided adding a video game arcade-ish area in the Sugarcube Corner would help ramp up the amount of money we get.” She explained like a professional business-pony. “It also helps pass the time when we don’t have anybody over.”

The duo had taken a left where Rarity’s Boutique was located that led to the famed bakery. Dash stopped, and sighed.

“What’s the matter?” Pinkie asked.

“It’s just that, the first non-pony I’ve ever loved is gone,” She replied.

“What about Gilda? She was a pretty close friend to you.”

“The griffon?” Dash raised an eyebrow. “She was a cover-up for another pony I was into. Besides, she was like a sister if anything.”

Pinkie opened the door, and held it open. “We’re here! Let’s make some cupcakes and cake!” The dinging sound of a new high score sounded once Dash entered.

“Sounds like someone’s being dominated,” Dash chuckled. “I wonder who it is.” She peered to the booth and saw a whitely dressed human sitting and a changeling. “It looks like it’s just Jacques and maybe Roxy.”

“Maybe,” Pinkie shrugged and walked to the back where the kitchen was located. “Come on Dash! Let’s bake some of the best things we’ll ever taste!”

Dash sighed, and walked to the back, leaving the couple at the booth playing Pony Combative Instinct.

“How does it feel to lose four times human?” Roxy snickered. “If I were you, I’d give up now and pay for the bakery items.”
“Never!” Richard taunted then pressed a combination of buttons. “Hadouken!” he yelled.

Roxy flinched as her character was knocked to the ground and lay stiff, “How’d you do that?” She yelled at the screen and pressed more buttons; forcing her fighter to get up and get into an attacking stance. “Feel the wrath of my moves!”
Richard pressed down then ‘B’ to send a knockdown move, “C-c-c-c-combo Breaker!” The game announced. He then jumped into the air and kicked Roxy’s character back down as it stood up.

“Game over,” it announced.

“Ha!” Richard jabbed his finger to the screen. “I told you that you were going to lose!”

The changeling crossed her arms and pouted, “You’re such a cheat.” She pulled out her sack of bits. “Next time, we’re doing Tran.”

“I’ll beat you in that too!” Richard said.

Roxy and Richard walked away from the rage-inducing arcade game and headed towards the counter. The changeling then placed the needed bits on the counter—where Mrs. Cake counted and placed it into the register—and grabbed the package of cupcakes.

Mrs. Cake looked at Roxy’s competitor and gasped. “Richard? ... How did you live?”

“I used nothing, I just appeared at Skittles’ place and came here since I was hungry for a sweet,” He looked around, and seeing no one else, he went closer to her ear. “Don’t tell anyone! If you do, then not only I can make a dramatic entrance, but things will go good until you do.”

The baker moved her hoof across her mouth as though there was a zipper there. “You have my word,” She blinked. “I still can’t believe it, how did no one earlier realize it was the real you?”

“I don’t know, maybe because I have this freakin’ awesome changeling powers!” The scout then changed into a changeling, but with his clothing still on and irises instead. “This is my disguise until I make my reveal.”

Pinkie poked her head out of the swinging door and looked out to see who the customer was and found the two changelings. “Ooo! Is that your friend Roxy?” She giggled.

“Not a special friend, just a brother of mine out of a twenty,” She said, nudging the scout’s arm. “Isn’t that right Dick Fosbury?”

“Uhh, yea!” He exclaimed, flinching at the use of his last two names. “I’m just visiting, looking for a place to live since the Queen has abandoned hive number… err.”

“You don’t even remember the name of our hive?” Roxy glared playfully. “The name of the hive was Olympics.”

“Oops,” The ‘changeling’ shuffled his hooves. “It’s just that I’ve left the hive so long ago since that I’ve forgotten, sorry Roxy.”

“Well, it was nice seeing you err, Fosbury,” Pinkie waved, not wanting to say the word ‘dick’ for the fear of the beep. “If you want, I’ll give you a party of welcoming later today!” she gleamed.

“That would be great!” Richard replied, smiling in a mischievous way only visible to Mrs. Cake and Roxy. “I’ll be sure to get there; I hope something big is going to happen.”

“I hope so too,” Dash’s head appeared next to Pinkie, her face covered in dough and red frosting. “Hey Pinkie, let’s make some cake just for this coming party!” She grinned, placing a tall chef’s hat on. “My hat is taller than yours.”

Pinkie placed another hat on that barely touched the ceiling. “You were saying?” She went back into the area known as the kitchen.

“Oh it’s on!” the pegasus giggled, more happy than earlier. She closed the door. “Competition; whoever has the better cake, judged by Roxy’s new friend,will get twenty bits!” Dash yelled from the kitchen. “Set-go!”

Instant clattering was heard, making the changelings’ eyes open in surprise. “Does this happen a lot?”

“Unfortunately, yes,” Mrs. Cake sighed and rolled her eyes. “Luckily, we’ve stocked up on so many ingredients for cake, that my husband gave half of what we got straight to Pinkie’s usage.”

“That’s right,” Mr. Cake walked down the stairs behind them, with two foals barely out of their babyhood on his back.

“Although Jennifer uses the basement more often than Pinkie, it contains the entire bakery ingredients needed.”

“Well,” Roxy patted Richard’s shoulder. “We ought to get going, is Jennifer downstairs?”

“No, she went to Jacques to talk to him about something,” one of the babies cooed. “And it looks like it’s Mrs. Cake’s turn to take over my job.”

“Okay dear,” the baker smiled, “See you two at about six tonight.”

“Bye!” Roxy waved after Richard exited the door, closing it, “Looks like we’re heading to Rarity’s now.”

(...)

A loud bang erupted from within the boutique, spooking the two into not really wanting to enter the carousel-like building. Another loud bang made Richard decide to find out what was going on.

He knocked. “Hello it’s the police, open up!”

Sudden silence followed, and a couple of locks came undone before it was opened. “How can I help you officer?” Rarity said, looking at the two un-uniformed changelings. “Wait a minute, you two aren’t Civil Protection! Who are you and… Oh, hi Roxy!”

“Ma’am, would you please let us inside to investigate a possible murder scene within your home?” Richard spoke with a stone cold expression—he tried so hard not to visibly smile.

“But you’re not Civil Protection!” Rarity spat. “I could have you turned in just because you’re impersonating a policeman!”

“Ma’am,” Roxy spoke, pulling out a fake badge real enough to look like one. “This is my assistant for today; he’s in training for door-to-door police work. Now if you’ll excuse us, we need to enter your home for investigation. “

“Roxy, when did you start being a Civil Protection policeman? And when did they start letting changelings become one?” The fashionista spoke, opening the door wide and letting the two in.

“About a week ago and stop stalling,” Roxy spoke suddenly having a catchy and popular tune in her head. “Now if you’ll excuse us, we’ll inspect this building and once everything’s clear, we’ll let you-“

“Roxy!” Richard spoke, waving her over. “I believe to have found something of significance.” He said, trying to sound as sophisticated as possible.

The changeling walked over and took a look. She coughed and pulled out a pad. Roxy then used her magic to scribble down some notes. After a minute, she then put it away and pulled out a magnifying glass.

“What is it?” Rarity said, trying to look over them.

“We’ve found an illegal drug on the ground miss,” Richard revealed a small bag filled with multicoloured powder. “It’s about fifteen grams of Wonderbolt, a new popular thing in the market.”

“That’s not mine,” Rarity said, trying to snatch the bag away.

“Of course not, it’s ours now,” Roxy took the bag and placed it into her saddlebags. She turned her gaze to the disguised human. “You head to the back, make sure she doesn’t have anything else funny.”

“On it,” Richard nodded.

“Don’t go back there! You’re gonna have to have a warrant for that!” Rarity yelled.

“We do,” Roxy flashed the paper into her face and placed it next to her hooves. “Keep going Fosbury, I’m sure you’ll find something that catches your eye.”

Richard walked down a hallway and opened the third left door to find a maskless Jacques lying down sideways on the bed with his head propped with the right hand. The scout shook his head and walked in.

“Seduce me,” the spy said, bending his left knee and placing his other arm on it. “You know you want to you dirty changeling.”

“You jerk,” Richard chuckled. “That’s no way how to speak to a friend.”

“Of course not Richard,” Jacques said, not moving a muscle. “Also, can you help me? Rarity kind of froze me here in any pose she desires so that she can have the best modeling available.”

“Then how did you move your left leg?” Richard placed his porous hooves on the Frenchman and forcibly moved his body straight up.

“You got me,” Jacques stood from his ‘freezing’ and straightened his tie. “But she does use the spell sometimes. Also my good friend, you may not want to look back. If anything, leap unto my arms.”

“Why?” A gas mask exhalation sound came from behind, startling him. Richard yelped then leaped and clung to the pinstripe suit, trying to completely surround the spy with his arms.

A chuckle came from the origin of the sound, but quickly died away as footsteps came closer. The space around them suddenly felt angry and wrathful as Richard pulled his small changeling body closer to Jacques.

“Please don’t hurt me!” Richard begged. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry when I didn’t tell you!”

A pause made him close his eyes as he prepared for the worst. Suddenly, a cold, gloved hand touched him on the back and rubbed.
“Is that really you Richard Dick Fosbury?” Jennifer spoke, reaching out and grabbing the small disguised human off of Jacques chest and into her arms. “Is that really you?” She took off her gas mask and nuzzled the changeling.

He opened his eyes and did a small jazz hand gesture, “Tadaa! … Yea it’s me, I’m just disguised.” He then jumped off and landed to the floor. “Don’t tell anyone else, other than Roxy or Mrs. Cake. Those are the only two that I know that know I’m here.”

“What about Rarity?” Jacques said, and then his eyes opened wide. “Let me check if she’s right in the hallway, she could be hearing our conversation.” He lightly pushed Jennifer to the side and looked out into the main lobby; where Roxy and the fashionista were talking.

“We’re clear,” Jacques closed the door and turned to the duo. “So Richard, where did you turn up?”

“Over at Rainbow Dash’s place,” he waved a dismissive hoof, then got to the floor and changed back to his normal form. He sat down on the bed. “But the strangest thing was, when I was teleported—with no idea how long, or what happens in the outside world—it felt like as though only a second passed.”

“Princess Twilight told us that it should be different,” Jacques placed a finger on his yet unshaven face. “You should’ve felt time pass by in the form of a void appearing waiting for you to choose your spot to land. I just wonder why didn’t you teleport until now.”

“It was actually about a quarter of an hour after noon today that I had appeared,” the Bostonian rubbed the back of his head. “Roxy apparently found cinnamon bread clinging to my back after I had appeared lying on top of Skittles’ bed.”

“Yep, bread sometimes happen every now and then,” Jennifer said. “At least you weren’t stuck in a desert that was almost literally an ocean.”

“How’d they find you? I know Roxy told me that you were found, but how?”

“Short story, I found them,” Jennifer sat down next to Richard and propped her elbows on her knees. “Long story; I appeared in what looked like an oasis. ‘Okay’ I say, ‘this is a nice place, but I need to get back home’. So I decided to fill my helmet and suit with water, mainly as a cooler cause I was wearing my jumpsuit underneath. I held it like a backpack, and walked away from that paradise I temporarily called home for about an hour or so.

“By night I walked; by day I camped and tried to keep as cool as possible by using my jumpsuit as a short tent. By day ten of walking, I was running out of water and smelled heavily of musk and sweat. Day thirteen I had found a campground, but no one—not even a living being—had resided there. I looked around for anybody, or at least a dead body. Seeing nothing, I had raided the campground of their water—I was living on really large scorpions and small insentient nagas, at least I thought they were—and some makeshift clothing. I looked like a damned Egyptian trader as I left the campground. With plenty of water, I headed in the same direction as I had headed towards before.

“About a day later; I came across a much larger oasis. But man, I found out the water had been contaminated with dead horses, large nagas still holding swords, and bipedal cats floating around in the water; so no water there. I eventually came to my wits and tested to find out how dead they were; only a day earlier they were slaughtered—I ate them obviously, needed food at the time. So I had waited in case anyone was coming by. Seeing that two days had passed, I went to walk again.

“Here’s the fun part! I started to have hallucinations! Yea I know, scary. One day of hallucinations and I started to slowly lose my mind. I kept thinking that Cairo was just over that next hill after seeing a dumb mirage…It wasn’t. Eventually I ran out of my precious—it’s water Richard! Not a damn ring— and was slowly losing consciousness about how long I was walking. It wasn’t until a black box-like thing in the day had appeared in the distance that I decided to run towards it. With my mask on my belt—I left my suit behind at the campground, it carried too much weight—and my clothing moving loosely, it made me look like I was an attacking cat-thing—a war was happening between them two, but made peace as they found me to take me home.

“I ran up to them, watching as the black thing was getting closer. I stopped to catch my breath, and saw that the small black thing was coming up next to me. I yelled for help and waved my hands in the air. After twenty minutes of me doing nothing but seeing spots, the black thing came closer and I noticed that it was a black-colored group of a caravan. They saw me and instantly lifted their spears so that they can recognize who I was safely. Seeing that I was in a near state of death; they took me to a medical wagon and helped me back up. The ones that saved me were bipedal cats—I called them furries because that’s what they looked like; and no Richard, I’m not making fun of your interests—and they grew interested in me and tried to trade me for several gold just so that I could become a slave, which kind of slave I don’t know.

“A Saddle Arabian ambassador eventually bought me for some money and tried to make me do slave work for the leader because of my hands. It wasn’t until Sunny-Ass found me several days after I was bought to actually get away from the stallion’s grubby hooves—I knew he wanted to wreck this newfound slave—and make a deal. I wasn’t bought again, but more like snatched from his hooves. That Sun-Butt knew what she was doing, and she told me that they were on a search for me and a couple others from our team.

“Then dumb politics happened between the Cat Country—I believe it was called The United Scarab Commonwealth, I don’t fucking know—Saddle Arabia and Equestria. It took a week until I came back to this imperialistic country. A welcoming party was held in my honor, and the finding of, at the castle in Canterlot. It was really touching, until I noticed that two others were gone, Fluttershy and you, Richard. Well, about Fluttershy, I was told by a guard that night that someone wanted to talk to me in Luna’s room. I opened the door to the gothic horse’s room, and found the little butter pony calmly sleeping on the bed. I tried to wake her up, but that damned Luna appeared at the most awkward moment of me waking her up; me trying to give CPR. She blushed and walked to my side and finally noticed that sleeping custard was lying on her bed.

“She yelled for the guard—who pointed spears at me instantly, damn speciesists—and told them that the missing bubblegum vanilla-pony was on her bed. Luna kissed the pony as an attempt because she read some kind of fanfiction about Snow White, and woke her up. I don’t think the True Love’s kiss actually works in this realm, but if it was, then that’s some weird lesbian shit. But Shutterfly woke up and instantly pulled out her bonesaw from the inside of her coat with the angriest look a cute pony can make. After several minutes of telling her she’s okay, she calmed down and walked down with us back to the party where she was hugged by her friends and had another party within the party,” Jennifer shrugged and opened a bottle of water and chugged it whole. “The party was about a week ago, and the whole walking and dealing with the desert situation was about twenty-one days before, and I was told that the battle in Canterlot happened about two days after my teleportation, the same day we escaped Stalliongrad,” she finished, spreading her arms wide.

“I must say, it seems like your way was decent compared to Mikhail Bakunin,” Jacques stated.

“What happened to him?” Richard and Jennifer spoke in unison.

The Frenchman put a finger to his chin. “He landed in a brothel in the country of Grayphon, you guys know that right? Well, the thing here is, after he appeared in the brothel, our good friend Gilda—you guys should remember her from the brothel in Stalliongrad—found the guy on one of the beds in an unoccupied room. She walked in on him rubbing his head, and Gilda decided to take advantage of this moment. Once she was done with him, Gilda walked to the headmaster and recommended that he’d stay. Eventually, he grew popular around the capital city; so popular that the Empress of the country decided to hire him because the husband didn’t fulfill her desires. The Emperor was okay with this since it was a human and not another griffon—twisted huh? Word was caught to the princess in the newspaper from Grayphon that the Empress was having an affair with a bipedal ape-like creature.

“Eventually Princess Celestia came to the capital with one goal, which was to get Mikhail out of Grayphon and into Equestria. The Empress wasn’t happy with the idea and they almost got into a cat fight. The Empress thought Princess Celestia was jealous—which I believe by the way—and attempted to declare war all over Mikhail. The Russian appeared after twenty minutes of bickering, really tired and dressed in nothing but a sleeping robe and clearly having a coffee noon break. All he said was ‘what’ and both girls wanted to declare him theirs. It was like watching two teenagers finally claiming their dibs and trying to redeem it at the same time. Mikhail, clearly in shock, stopped the two with his muscular strength and decided going back home was a better idea—he left his precious Sasha here at Sweet Apple Acres—once he got his clothing and items together.”

“And what kind of items is that?” Richard asked, cleaning his ear with Q-tips from nearby.

“Well, some of them are things given by the public fans of his...succession. The rest—which was most of it—was presents from the Empress given to him because he did a good job, which was virtually a hundred percent of the time.”

“What do you mean virtually? Wouldn’t it be all the time?” Jennifer spoke, unzipping her outer, flame-retardant suit.

“Well, there was only one time that he didn’t want to do it, and that was just a couple days after he was hired, all because he was tired. Boy did he learn! The Empress took a whip and dealt with him, and then dealt with him after that!”

“Eww,” Jennifer gagged. “You mean after whipping…?”

“Yep, but she didn’t want him too hurt. He was basically babied throughout the whole time, only punished when he didn’t do what the Empress hired him to do,” Jacques lit a cigarette and looked at the still closed door. “I’m surprised Marshmallow didn’t appear and budge in. Either Roxy had a really interesting conversation, or she completely forgot about me; most likely the latter.”

The door opened and Richard instinctively transformed into his changeling form. It opened wide, and revealed Roxy with a wide grin on her face.

“Jacques! Your so-called ‘in-law parents’ are in the lobby wanting to talk to you,” the changeling looked around and found Jennifer in her jumpsuit. “Nice orange suit! But isn’t it supposed to cover your entire body?”

“It usually does,” The pyro tied the arm sleeves together. “But I like having my undershirt out, releases the heat from my waist down; it’s a really thick material.”

Roxy slowly nodded her head, “Anyways, I’ve distracted Rarity long enough that you guys can walk out. But Jacques has to stay and talk about something to his proposed fiancé.” Jacques jumped from his chair and dashed out of the room into the hallway towards the lobby.

“Fiancé! I am your fiancé?” Rarity shrieked from the lobby. “You haven’t even proposed…Oh yea, sorry.”

Jennifer pointed towards the door way in confusion. “Did they really…?”

“No,” Roxy replied. “But they might as well be proposed from now on, the parents know and it’s not going to be good if they find out it wasn’t even happening. Wait... By the name of my ancestors I believe he’s actually proposing!” Roxy peered out the door with Richard and Jennifer stacking above her.

“Would you, my comrade in arms, and best friend,” Jacques was kneeling on the ground with a box in his hand. “Would you like to be my-“

“Yes!” Rarity squeaked and hugged the spy’s chest—even kneeling proved that he was still a little taller than the pony—in happiness and joy.

“Well I was going to say my girlfriend, but I guess this can work,” Jacques rubbed the back of his head as the pony snuggled closer.

“I don’t care, at least now we’re official and not made up,” Rarity said, squeezing his chest.

“What? You mean earlier you two weren’t together in the first place?” a white, bulky stallion with a sport cutie mark spoke. “Then what was that a couple weeks ago?”

“Honestly, I was trying to get her off of my chest,” Jacques grabbed the pony and lifted her up. “But she decided that clamping with such vice-grip that it really difficult to get her off.”

The pink mare standing beside the stallion chuckled. “That’s my Rare-Rare. Snuggled him long and hard,” She giggled. “Maybe next time, make sure it’s a marriage proposal and not some relationship proposal, no matter how dramatic it is.”

“Will do,” Jacques placed Rarity down as she groaned at her horrible nickname. He then walked to the door and held it open. “See you in a couple weeks!”

“Ta-ta!” Rarity’s mother said as Jacques closed the door.

“Well, I believe that could’ve gone better, don’t you think?” the fashionista spoke, fluffing her hair.

“Well, Fosbury, Roxy, Jennifer and I must go,” He waved them over and looked at his watch; six forty-five. “You might as well come too; Pinkie’s having a party at Sugarcube Corner at seven.”

Her eyes shot open wide, “How much more time do I have?”

“About fifteen minutes before the party starts,” Jennifer started pushing the spy out of the door.

“Also, we may have a huge surprise at the party,” Roxy winked at Richard as he closed the door to the boutique behind him. “And it’s all starting with a special appearance.”

“You mean you haven’t officially revealed yourself?” Jennifer asked, lifting the disguised human changeling unto her shoulders. “That’s just cold-blooded man.”

“I got this!” Richard exclaimed. “If anything, the worst that’ll happen is that Rainbow Dash will most likely try and make sure I’m dead. Wait a minute,” Richard searched into his hidden pocket and pulled out a familiar container.

“Don’t you dare,” Jacques reached for the bottle of pills. “You’re not going to cause terror tonight!”

Richard pulled them away and popped a pill into his mouth, “Too slow chuckle-nuts! I already got one!” He then swallowed and licked his lips. “I should’ve thought this through, I need to wash it down with something.”

“Hey changeling, wash it down with this!” Nick yelled ahead of them with a can of ‘Bonk!’

“Heck yea!” Richard jumped from Jennifer’s head and landed next to the sniper. He then grabbed the can and took a sip.

“Thank you so much! I thought my mouth was going to…Wait a minute,” Richard took another sip and tried to taste to flavor. “This tastes a bit different, did you do something to this?” the changeling asked, looking up at the Australian who was holding a video recorder.

“Of course I didn’t!” Nick said, shocked. “I wouldn’t dare to mess with someone’s drink. I just opened this can and decided to give it to a fan of Richard from the goodness of my heart.” The scout took another sip. Trying to find out what the liquid was, he poured some into the ground.

Like it was harvested fresh from the source, urine came out of the mouth of the drink and unto the ground. Richard dropped, and felt as though everything was going in slow motion; Jennifer was trying so hard not to vomit, Jacques was laughing and snorting, and Nick just watched with his video recorder recording the tragic event.

Richard’s world spun around as he came to the realization that he drank Nick’s piss. He fell to the soft, grassy ground and slowly lost consciousness.

(...)

Richard slowly opened his eyes, and was forced to shut them again as a blinding light had entered into his vision. A rhythmic beeping caught his attention as he tried to find out what was going on.

“Nurse Redheart! Try and get Arvin or Fluttershy here pronto!” a stallion’s voice yelled. “Wait! I think the creature’s coming to!”

Richard groaned lifted a hoof to his head to deflect the bright light. “Where am I?” He weakly asked. “What happened?”

The light dimmed, allowing the scout to finally see his doctor. “I’m Dr. Carrot Top and you’re in the Ponyville hospital for fainting. Although it was a small faint, we may believe that you’re allergic to something.”

The Bostonian continued to rub his head, and felt a claw where his hoof should be. He suddenly realized that he was now a xenomorph. He lifted his tail to wrap it around his leg, but felt it clatter on the table nearby.

“Sir, we need you to calm down! I know this must be hard to understand, but bear with me,” Dr. Carrot Top scolded. “Where’s one of the medics?”

Suddenly, a door opened, and as though doves flew behind him, Arvin walked from a very bright hallway and to Richard’s side.

“Oh thank god you’re here doc!” Richard said, propping himself up. “I just need a quick over-heal with that medigun and we’ll be fine!” He chuckled weakly.

The German turned his head to the doctor and nodded his head towards the door. “Alright, but I’ll be just outside the door in case anything happens,” Carrot Top said, exiting the small emergency room.

Arvin looked at him with a sad look in his eyes, and hugged the alien-like scout. “You don’t know how long it’s been good friend,” He said, pulling away and lifting the medigun. “This land is being too good for me. I feel myself growing less insane, and more at peace. I am such a dummkopf! Why haven’t realized this earlier?” The medigun continued to flow more of the now snow white and dark blue plasma trails into Richard’s body. “I’m sorry Rich, but I just got to talk to someone I haven’t in a long while. So, it looks like Nick had decided to give you his best prank, eh?”

“Heck yea he did,” The scout coughed. “But I think I fainted out of-“

“Out of disgusted realization, am I right?” Arvin interrupted and lowered the healing device. Richard nodded. “Well, that’s wunderbar. Anyways, your order from me is to check the can of cola next time before you drink it. You are to be careful about drinking urine next time, wouldn’t want you starring in a survivalist show with that bear guy.”

“At least it’s not mine,” Richard got off the medical bed. “Anyways, I have a party to go to. What time is it?”

“It’s about ten after seven,” the medic replied, looking at a large clock. “Can I come with you? This town is so boring without barely any medical emergencies, it’s all mainly just colds and since the season is coming up; some various kinds of flus and dangerous coughs.”

“Flu is coming?”

“Well, our team doesn’t have to really worry about it, blame the medigun for having such a cure-all,” Arvin placed his coat on a nearby rack and removed his gloves. “Come on, you have a party to go to, we don’t want to be late.”

(.)

Richard sighed as he approached the door to Sugarcube Corner in his changeling from. He opened it to find that the room was pitch-black and very quiet. He rolled his eyes, and turned on the nearby magical light switch.

“Surprise!” Everybody in the room yelled with joy.

“Welcome to Ponyville Fosbury!” Pinkie yelled, and appeared two feet in front of him. “This is virtually all of Ponyville! I’m so glad you came here.”

“Why,” Richard shuffled, still feeling the after-effects of changing back into a changeling from a xenomorph.

“Because we a huge surprise for you! Come, I’ll show you where it is!” the pink pony grabbed his hoof and pulled him next to a table with two cakes.

“This is my cake,” Rainbow Dash said, pointing to an orange cake with three layers and designs, with her face covered different coloured icing and flour. She then pointed at a single layer cake with Richard’s exact changeling look on it. “And this one’s Pinkie’s. Mine was supposed to be based on the new Quarter-Life game; I was told there was going to be three games and I just wanted to show you how much this game is going to be awesome!” she squee’d.

“Mine’s all about you, new friend!” Pinkie took a knife and sliced both cakes. “Not tell us, who made the better cake?” She handed him two plates with slices of cake looking exactly like each other.

Richard swallowed and took a fork from a nearby table. “Which one is Rainbow Dash’s?”

Pinkie looked at the right plate, then to the left. “I really don’t know, but try this one!” She gave him the right plate.

Using his magic, he then took a forkful of the cake and bit into it. He chewed and paused, finally noticing how quiet the party got to and noticed that they were all watching him. Richard swallowed and made his judgment before reaching for the other plate.

After eating a little of both pieces of cake, the Bostonian nodded and pointed to the left cake. Everyone in the room gasped and started whispering to each other.

“Woo!” Dash yelled. “I won! I actually won at something I wasn’t even good at!” She did an air-moonwalk.

“But, how?” Pinkie looked at the ground. “But I’m usually the best at baking. Please, tell me how did I lose?” She grabbed ahold of chest and shook him.

Richard scratched his neck. “For one thing, Dash’s cake did have a lot more flavors into it. The other thing was that,” He bit his lip. “Honestly Pinkie Pie, your cake was too sugary for my mouth.”

The crowd gasped and grew silent. “W-w-what?” Pinkie stuttered, releasing him and sat on her haunches. “H-how can this be?”

“Well for one thing, I’m not a pony,” Richard chuckled and prepared to change. “Oh and by the way, I ain’t even a changeling, well sort of.”

Green flames erupted from his back hooves as he stood up. His body changed material, and the clothing that were on his before fit to his human body. Richard yawned as the flames dissipated to reveal his face and new hair features.

“Do you have any idea who you were talking to?” He spoke, patting Dash’s head. “I’ve told my last name dumbo. How did you not get that it was me the whole time?”

Dash stood there with her mouth wide open as she tried to realize what was happening. “It’s like a dream come true,” She muttered. The pegasus then grabbed the scout’s shirt and pulled him closer. “How are still alive? We thought you were dead!”

“If I was, then I’m a spooky scary skeleton,” A little ticking sound came from his feet. He looked down and found Pinkie’s head turning clockwise in time to the ticks. “Now that’s creepy.”

A ringing sound erupted as Pinkie’s face lit up in a large smile. “Oh my gosh! It’s you!” Pinkie hugged his legs.

“Yea of course it’s me,” Richard said, spreading his arms. “Anyone else want a hug that missed me? It’s only a bit to do so!”

Several minutes later showed Richard hugging the last of the partygoers—whose coat was a light blue colour with white, extremely frazzled hair. He sighed, and let go of the final pony.

“Bark!” She giggled and walked away from the confused human. “I’m just kidding, or am I?”

He shook his head. “Any idea on the pony that’s supposed to keeping tabs on her?” He yelled to the crowd.

Dr. Carrot Top appeared and coughed. “I am, but she seems like she’s acting good today; so I let her go to this party,” he then fluffed his hair.

“Hey uh, doc,” The pony turned his head. “Do you have any funny jokes that should be told? Or can you make up one with a few props?”

“I do have some jokes,” He chuckled. “But I like to do them in my hidden alias, although no-one here actually knows who you are if you just hide your cutie mark and restyle your hair; I like mine really stretched out and hanging rather this weird flattop style.”

“Where’s Arvin?”

“Oh he’s nearby Screw Loose—that’s her name by the way—and keeping a close eye on her,” He pointed to the duo playing a game of pin the tail on the pony. “I don’t know if it’s just me, but it seems like the medic always knows what Screw is going to do.”

“Because he’s cuckoo!” Richard made swirls around his head. “Well, he was and I’m assuming that’s why he just knows.”

“Ah, that would explain why,” Dr. Carrot said. “Well, I must be off to take Screw Loose back home, seems like she’s getting attracted to the medic.” He pointed to the group showing that the said pony was hugging the German and nuzzling his neck.

“Bye!” Richard stood from his chair and walked over to the punch bowl where Jennifer, Mikhail, and Dell were, dressed in tuxes.

“Hey guys! Long no see apparently,” Instantly, he was hugged the by massive heavy weapons guy.

“I thought the little baby was dead forever,” He spoke, in a more fluent way.

“Hey! If you don’t let me go, then maybe I will be big guy,” Mikhail released his hold. “Wow, I’ve heard about your return from the teleportation troubles.”

The Russian heartily laughed. “It was decent up until pony princess appeared, reminding me of my Sasha,” He drunk the rest of the punch in his cup. “The griffon Empress just wanted cuddling and an intimate relation with me. Big griffon didn’t care about it,” He leaned in, and whispered. “But he also wanted to see if I lived up to rumors… Let’s just say he can no longer worry about loud farts.”

“Eww!” Jennifer squealed. “No more details Heavy!”

Dell laughed and threw his arms around the group. “I missed you guys; let’s make sure we never stop being friends.”

“Hey Richard Douchebag Fosbury,” A tomboyish yell from behind them caught their attention.

“Yea Dash?” Richard replied.

“Catch!” The scout turned and saw a cake flying to his face. He attempted to react to the flying bakery item, but it slammed unto his face before he even moved. “That’s what you get!”

“Alright, I did deserve it,” Richard wiped the black icing off of his face. “Now that I’ve noticed it, I think Pinkie’s cake is better than yours.”

“You take that back,” Dash flew up to him and poked him on the chest. “My cake was better and you know it!” She huffed.

The scout waved a dismissive hand and wiped his face clean of any icing. Suddenly, the crowd grew again grew quiet as he threw the sugar filled napkin into the trash.

“Hey Richey,” Jennifer whispered into his ear. “You better look your best, all three of the princesses—and I’m assuming a forth one is the pink one walking with Twilight—are in the room. They’re probably interested in you coming back.”

Richard turned his gaze and was met face-to face with the tall, white alicorn with a slight smile on her face. “Yo what’s up?” He said, jerking his chin up.

“What’s up is that thou art alive despite what’s happened to thine teammates,” Princess Luna spoke, her mane now very similar to her sister’s; ethereal and sparkling like they use glitter glue as conditioning. “But we digress; we—my sister, Twilight, our niece and us—are here to celebrate that thou is not dwelling within the necropolis.”

“What my sister is saying is that-“ Princess Celestia started.

“Yea I already know what’s she’s trying to say,” Richard sighed. “I was forced to study archaic language for high school.”

Luna’s eyes beamed, “So thou understand what we speak?” She clapped her hooves together and smiled.

“Not only him,” Jennifer spoke. “Most of us understand, well the ones that naturally speak English.”

“How?” The dark princess cocked her head. “And what’s this English?”

“It’s the language we speak,” Jennifer handed a cup of punch to the pony. “And there was this class in school we had to take where we had to study several books and poems that came from at least from two centuries, to up to a millennia ago.”

Luna rubbed her chin then looked at her sister with a disappointed face. “We’ll to talk thee later,” she then turned her gaze around the room and saw the rest of the mercenaries scattered around, standing and not really bowing unlike the ponies. “Why art thou ape-creatures not bowing?” She boomed.

“Well,” Arvin spoke walking up next to Celestia. “We’re not officially your citizens, but if we are then not all of us actually have had royalty rule over us with a harsh bowing rule.”

“Luna,” Celestia spoke. “These humans never had any royalty ruling over them; maybe one or two, but never all of them.”

“Tavish’s Scottish,” Richard thumbed in his direction, where he was hanging on a ledge with a bottle of rum in his hand. “But I’m not really sure if he has the Queen of England technically ruling over him.”

“Wait,” Celestia raised a brow. “Does this Queen rule with an iron hoof?”

“Not really,” Jacques said, leaning near the doorway in case of enemies. “She’s one of the kindest people you’ll possibly meet. Then again, she’s pretty old compared to us, about forty years at least.”

“Does she have any descendants?” Cadence asked. “Does she at least have a king ruling with her?”

“Nope,” Jennifer shook her head. “She only has a son that’s married and I believe they have a child with them.”

“But the queen is still living, how much longer though?” the pink alicorn said.

“I’d give it about two years,” Richard shrugged.

“Half a year, given how's she's in the late eighties,” Arvin said.

“Not even! I’d say about three year’s tops for old age!” Nick yelled nearby the cash register.

“Can you guys stop? You making the pink pony worried,” Jennifer yelled then turned her gaze towards the four princesses. “Are you here for business? I have a feeling that having us will cause more chaos than needed be.”

“Not really,” A disembodied voice spoke. “You guys are in fact helping balance everything out.” The chimera appeared, drinking a cocktail. “If you want, I could get you guys sent home without any problems. Well in fact one little tiny problem.”

“So what’s this little problem?” Jane spoke with a cigar in his mouth, and pulled out a shotgun and loaded a shell. “I’ll make sure it’s gone.”

“Well the problem is, if I send you back, there’ll be no way for you guys to ever come back,” He chuckled. “So all the harmony that you’ve ever-“

“I just want to get home dammit!” the pyro yelled, pulling out her giant shard of volcano fragment. “If you can do that, then maybe I won’t have to use this.”

“Whoa! I didn’t know you were so eager to get home,” Discord rubbed his chin. “What about you guys? It’s a one-way trip over all.”

A tap on his shoulder caught his attention. The chimera turned and faced a Texan holding a PDA. “I’m afraid that our family is mighty worried about us,” Dell said, pressing a few buttons. “But I need to tie up a few loose ends before I go; mostly unfinished business.”

“Anyone else want to take care of business before leaving?” Discord snapped his fingers and was suddenly surrounded in a ticket booth and was dressed as a ticket agent, complete with a red vest and hat. “I’ll be waiting until you guys decide whenever. But only for a limited time, so come on down!”

The Wheel of Fortune theme suddenly played out of nowhere, and Sugarcube Corner turned into the set with the wheel and mares in velvet dresses, wondering how they got there. A pad revolved a wall around to reveal a large mock making of a ticket with Saxton Hale’s face on it.

Discord walked from behind the ticket, holding a microphone with a very short, and cut off cord. “Hi everybody! Let’s bring our first contestants down!” He snapped his fingers again then Luna, Jacques, Richard, Dell, and Mikhail appeared at the bidder’s booth.

“How much are you going to bid on this ticket to go back to your solar system on planet Earth?” Discord yelled into his microphone. He then pointed to the crowd of what used to be the partygoers behind them. “Help them out you guys!”

“Ten bits,” Luna said.

Richard looked behind him into the confused crowd and then leaned into his microphone. “I say eleven bits,” He smiled, knowing that he was the one guy that bidden higher than the other person.

“One hundred euros,” Jacques said, then adjusted his Frenchman’s Beret.

“It’s free?” Mikhail finally spoke after looking at the ticket nonstop.

“Ding-ding-ding!” Discord chimed. “My Russian friend is correct! Or he was probably Russian the answer.” He laughed, and then snapped his fingers and teleported them back the bakery. “All you have to do is ask to go back home, but it only lasts until tomorrow! So you better get ready to head back home,” several baggages appeared next to him as aviators floated from the sky and landed on his nose. “You better start packing up! This offer closes at this exact time tomorrow!”

Discord conjured a giant golden clock with a chain and put it around his neck, “It’s only nine o’clock and you have twenty-four hours left!” He snapped his fingers and Richard felt a tug on his chest as he was pulled towards the chimera. “You’re a special case here boy.”

“What?” the Bostonian reached for his three-pronged blade, but it fell as he was lifted into the air.

“Discord!” Princess Celestia’s voice yelled. “Don’t you dare hurt him, or I’ll make sure you’ll be hurt”

“Oh please,” He scoffed. “I only wanted one thing from him.” He snapped his fingers and a small bottle lifted from the scout’s pocket, he dropped and clenched his chest. “And that thing was a bottle of alien gene-splicers. I’m going to give these to a good friend of mine, and have him make some permanent draconequus splicers.”

“Why?” Richard asked, trying to regain his breath, “Just so that you rebuild your extinct population?”

“My race is not extinct!” the chimera hissed. “Thanks to you, they’re now going to be prosperous once again!”

“But they’re not you,” Richard gasped. “They’re not going to be as magical and powerful like you. I bet they’re going to be just mortals!”

“I will make them powerful then!” Discord raised a fist, but lowered it as a sad frown grew on his face. “Who am I kidding? They’re never going to be pure-bloods, no matter how much magic I put into them.”

Jane reached for the bottle and pulled it away from the psychopathic demon creature. “Sorry private, but magic belongs in Canada!” He yelled into his ear. “Do it like a man and make your own babies!”

Discord pulled out a white handkerchief and blew his nose. “Thanks Solly,” He threw the cloth behind him as it turned into doves. “I have one question, will you be the one to-“

“Hell no,” the American said bluntly. “I will not be your mate. But what I can do is recommend-“

“Fluttershy?”

“Err, close enough,” Jane then pushed him forward and patted his back. “Go get ‘em lion, goat thing?”

Fluttershy watched as the chimera walked up to her in a confident swagger. “C-can I help you?” She whispered. He then kneeled down and whispered into her ear. “…Okay, I will.”

“Really?” Discord smiled. “Well, we’ll start tonight! Once we get back home.”

Arvin rubbed his temples and secretly hoped that it wasn’t what he thought.
“Okay everypony—and humans,” the chimera clasped his paw and claw together. “We’ll get some rest and—you don’t really have to, no really, don’t—pray for the best tomorrow, farewell everyone and have a wonderful night! Don’t forget that Hearth’s Warming Day isn’t that far! Ta-ta!” He snapped his claw and disappeared in a flume of smoke, along with Fluttershy.

“Well,” Princess Celestia looked at Richard, who was drinking even more punch. “I see that you’re back into your usual liquid drinking, but where did you appear?”

He smiled, and tossed the cup towards a trashcan like a professional basketball player. “I appeared on top of Rainbow Dash’s bed, and I nearly hurt my sister-like changeling, Roxy,” She appeared right beside him like a dog getting its name called. “Though I wonder what’ll happen after I leave; will she happy here and safe?”

“Of course I will!” Roxy proclaimed. “In fact, I believe I’m seeing somepony that’s not here at the moment.”

Richard patted her head, “Good for you. There could’ve been weirder places I could’ve appeared by the way, but I’ve been through worse.”

“Very well,” the alicorn spoke then looked around to meet her eyes with the humans. “I shall see you tomorrow exactly twenty-three hours from now.

“Good night, and be packed up and ready,” she concluded as she pulled them all together with her magic. She then surrounded her long forelegs as much of the group—without getting Tavish's drunken breath on her. “You have made a change in the nation, and I will thank you for your efforts. If it wasn’t for you guys, I don’t what would’ve happened.”

“It wasn’t really a big deal!” Jennifer chuckled, “Just another day at work.”

“But at least work doesn’t deal with having to sleep with snoring dinosaur,” Richard joked. A loud bang from the kitchen caught his attention. He turned, and saw the pegasus holding a rolling pin, and bouncing it on her left hoof.

“For the last time,” Dash snorted, visibly revealing a puff of white air. “I don’t snore!” She leaped towards the Bostonian and swung the wooden weapon down. He dodged and ran out of the building through a nearby window—completely ignoring the wide-open doorway.

He ran into the dark night with the angry pegasus chasing after him, totally forgetting any past troubles.

Author's Note

Didn't expect the chapter to be this long! Phew!
The best part about writing this is the Discord section. Completely loved how I put it together.
This is the second to last chapter.

Yes, the next chapter going to be the last one. So clench your butts cause I feel this is going to be such a twister!
(Was originally going to call this End of Line, but would this seem like a meaning for disappointment I personally don't like the all class melee weapon)

The End of Line (When in Equestria)

Fluttershy rolled over on her soft bed, completely forgetting the mass of items that lay next to her. She yelped and laid a hoof to feel what she'd lain on; small, rounded, and plastic beads.

“What are my beads doing here?” the pegasus whispered as she picked up a small rhinestone necklace. “Did I make this? Or did the Crusaders leave this here?” She searched for her lamp and clicked it on. “Who made this?”

“We made them,” a male voice spoke from the floor.

Fluttershy shuffled across the beads, peered over the other side, and found Discord laying in a mass of rhinestone bracelets and necklaces along with beads scattered everywhere. She giggled and picked up a completely blue necklace and looked at it.

“How long ago was this?” Fluttershy then helped the chimera to his feet and looked outside; still dark. “It’s either still night, or really early in the morning.”

Discord brushed himself of the stray faux gems clinging to his body, “It’s only two-fifty in the morning,” he plucked a stuck necklace from his back and put it around her neck. “We started making these things after we’ve decided having a best friend night was best idea; although playing ‘chubby bunny’ with small marshmallows wasn’t really a bright idea at first.”

“Why?”

“For one thing,” he picked up a necklace from Fluttershy’s bed near her pillow; it was made up of marshmallows. “I thought it was a good idea to make one into a necklace, and you grabbed out your rhinestone necklace maker—the one you said you’ve had since you were a filly—and we made a ton for no reason.”

The pegasus sighed and blushed, “I never thought I would actually use the machine ever again, not after what it did to me the last time.”
“What did it do?” The chimera flew from her bed towards the pink sewing machine-style object decorated with white butterflies. “It looks pretty harmless.” He poked around with the switches and small dials.

“It actually hurt me,” she rubbed her hoof. “I was making a necklace like the usual for Rainbow Dash when we were fillies, and once I had finished the last stone, I pulled it out and looked at my work. I noticed red and thought it was paint. I tried to put it down, and that’s when I found out it was actually latched to my hoof and the red was my blood. I fainted as soon as I recognized the blood.”

Discord pursed his lips and found the needle that caused the incident. “That must’ve been one hell of a necklace,” he smiled, poking at the sharp object. “But at least it didn’t happen again like last time.” He took the mechanical menace and threw it into the nearby closet. He wiped his hands. “And we don’t need it anymore!”

Fluttershy looked around the room and saw the amount of scattered rhinestones and beads. “What do we do about this now?” She asked, placing her medipack and gun against the wall. “We can’t just leave the necklaces and bracelets everywhere! My animal friends might accidentally eat it.”

“Do you think we have enough stones for the other ponies to make best friend bracelets for their partners?” Discord placed a claw on his chin, and scratched his head. “I mean, they are leaving today at nine.” He paused and looked at the now smiling pony. “I guess I’ll go and make coffee before you decide to wake the others. It’s going to be a long day.”

(…)

“Fluttershy!” Applejack moaned. “Ah know this is early sugarcube, but this is really early for some of us.”

“Yea,” Dash moaned from Applejack’s back, her eyes struggling to stay open. “This is way too early, you do have some coffee right?”

Discord tapped her shoulder and lifted her with one arm. “I’ll carry you to your ambrosia, but promise me that you’ll only have one cup, got it?” He poured the dark liquid into a cup, and placed it in her hooves.

“Yea okay,” the pegasus said, barely holding the warm cup. She took a sip. “This coffee is pretty good, for a chimera.”

“Thanks,” He replied sarcastically. “Remind me next time to give you my best.”

“Everybody!” Fluttershy quietly yelled. “I brought you ponies here so that we can make something for our best friends!”

Big Macintosh yawned, “Why am I here again?”

“Because I forced you to,” Applejack replied, drinking her cup of coffee. “Besides, you probably want something to give to your partner.”

“Now, the things you can make for them are a lot,” The yellow pegasus explained. “I have a machine over here that can make bracelets and necklaces,” she pointed to the pink object. “I also have loose rhinestones and paper over there; and I have plenty of scrap metal, tools, and paint in my shed in case you guys want to make something complicated.”

“So we’re doing arts and crafts for them?” Twilight asked, “And what about ceramic items? I can quickly heat them up and cool them down.”
“Good on ya!” Spike gave her an approving thumb, drinking his coffee with the other hand. “And while you’re at it, I’ll just go and sew something with that really girly machine you got me.”

“That’s a fantastic idea Spike!” Fluttershy clapped her hooves together as the dragon facepalmed. “Let’s get started shall we? We only have eighteen hours and twenty five minutes left, I’m pretty sure we can get something done today!”

Spike moaned in agony, “Why couldn’t I’ve just slept in today?”

(……)

A bird merrily chirped in the distance as Richard opened his eyes. With a smile, he stretched and reached to the other side of the bed to mess with the pegasus’ morning. He felt around for the pony, but received nothing but sheets. He rose from his side of the bed and decided to walk down the stairs. As the Bostonian reached the final step, a rustle in the kitchen caught his attention.

“Hello?” Richard said quietly.

“Hey brother,” Roxy replied, pouring batter unto a skillet on the stove. “I’m learning how to cook some pancakes. So you’re going to be the one that’ll taste test it.”

“Are they going to be burnt?” Richard opened the fridge and pulled out a carton of orange juice. He opened it and drank whatever was left. “I wonder why OJ is more expensive here.” He said, looking at the price tag.

“It’s because apple juice is more popular around here, so it’s cheaper,” Roxy flipped the cooking pancake. “Almost done, might as well get a plate and whatnot. OJ is also imported from a different farming town about four hours north by train.”

Richard sat down at the cloud table and placed his china plate down. He yawned, “Any idea where baby barf blue is?”

“Don’t know,” Roxy placed the golden brown hotcake on his plate. She then placed a cup of warm syrup and butter on the table. “Here’s the butter and syrup,” the scout nodded and poured the syrup. “I was told by Fluttershy that they’re doing something. But she never really told me what exactly they were doing.”

Richard moaned in bliss as he ate a bit of the pancake. “Dish ish awshum!” He mumbled, and swallowed. “You should try cooking more often.”

“Thanks, but I’m not really into cooking,” Roxy walked to the fridge and pulled out a bar of chocolate. “I don’t actually eat anything except love, but chocolate bought specifically for someone always does the trick.”

“Does it work if I bought you one?”

“It does,” The changeling ripped open the package and ate the bar. “This one was given to me by someone I’m seeing.”

“You mentioned that person last night,” Richard stood and brushed the crumbs off him. “What’s his name and what is he?”

“He’s a unicorn,” Roxy blushed and smiled. “And his name is Leroy.”

“Does his last name start with a ‘j’?” Richard looked at his nails for grime. She nodded. “I bought some chicken substitutes from him the other day; he didn’t really seem to like the job.”

“Yea, he kind of worked there before,” the changeling threw the wrapper into the trash. “But he’s now the CEO of the new Oculi system, and my current stallion-friend.”

“Let’s go see him!” He walked out of the kitchen and up the stairs to his room. “After I change of course, would be bad if they found me in my jammies and laughed.”

“…Did you seriously call those your jammies?” Roxy tried to suppress her laughter. “That’s gotta be the worst name I’ve ever heard those get called. If anything they should be called PJ’s.”

“So?” Richard replied as he replaced his old shirt with a new, non-bloody, white one. “I call them whatever I want them to be called.” He stopped once he reached for his pants. “Could you leave the room or at least turn around so that I may change my pants?”

“I don’t what the big problem is,” Roxy rolled her eyes and turned around to let the Bostonian change. “It’s not like I’ve never seen you naked.”

“What?” He yelled. “What do you mean ‘you’ve seen me naked’?”

“I mean that one time you decided to take a shower,” the changeling replied. “You walked out without any clothes on as I was waiting for my turn. In fact, you saw me and didn’t even care as I sat there.”

“I-I…” Richard paused. “We never had this conversation.” He turned and faced the eccentric bug, “Ever. Now go and put on some perfume or something. I don’t want to walk next to a smelly dragonfly.” He waved a dismissive hand.

“Hey! I was told my uncle was a dragonfly,” she pouted and crossed her forelegs. “Let’s go, I already put on my perfume this morning. I don’t need any more unless you wanna walk next to a dragonfly that smells like what could be described as love.”

“You mean food?” Richard snickered.

“Eh,” the changeling shrugged. “Either way it smells good. Now let’s go before daylight disappears into darkness. It’s a lot quicker now since it’s nearing the end of the year.”

(…)

“For the last time sir, we don’t allow walk-ins,” a mare yelled at the stallion standing before her. “Now good day, and please schedule an appointment next time! Next!” She said, in a strict voice.

“Hey Grace Manewitz,” Roxy spoke, placing a hoof on the table. “Think we can see him today? Oh and this is my figurative brother, Richard the scout.”

“Nice to meet you,” the purple mare said, not looking up from her typewriter. “Leroy is in at the moment, but he’s having a conversation with someone-“

“I don’t care if it takes me two minutes, or two hours!” The door leading into the room slammed open with as a vanilla colored mare was forcibly pushed out. “Just get me whatever’s on that list and pronto!”

A brown stallion from the doorway watched as the mare left the room. “I swear she’s going to be trouble one day,” He coughed, combing his white mane with a hoof. “I can take the next pony right now if… Roxy? What are you doing here?” He ran to her side and nuzzled the changeling’s neck.

“And this must be Richard, nice to meet you.”

“Yo,” the scout waved two fingers at him. “That chicken substitute was okay, by the way. It’s nice to see my little sister see a fancy guy.”

“Thanks,” Leroy turned around towards his room. “Come in, I want to talk personally.”

They slowly walked into the woody, bright sunlit room. Richard walked to a wingback chair and plopped himself in a slouched position; Roxy sat in the chair next to him while Leroy sat behind his lightly colored wooden desk. He sorted his papers and straightened his desk somewhat.

“So, let’s get down to business,” The stallion coughed. “I just want to know, who was that changeling you were walking with yesterday Roxy?”

“That was him,” She pointed to the scout, who was digging into his nose, “In his changeling form.”

“So he has changeling powers? Remarkable,” He smiled. “I have a question for the human; would you like to be in a game that consists of you and your team to fight against others like you?”

“You mean like us fighting a team like ours?” Richard asked, adjusting himself in the wingback chair. “Like how we did back in Las Pegasus?” Leroy nodded. “Sure, why not? Though our team and their team look, and act, completely different, I’m pretty sure you can take our team and make a huge copy, why?”

“Because I have a feeling this is going to be one the best investments I can ever make,” Leroy adjusted and searched through several papers. “As you being the spokesperson for the team,” he pulled out a packet of paper. “I want you to sign this to confirm you agree to the summarized agreement; I’ll take Luna’s team and make a huge copy so that they may fight ones similar to them. It won’t feature your team, just the others.”

“You mean I sign for them? Dude, you should’ve asked them, not me,” The scout replied. He stood up, looking around the room. “I feel there’s someone else other than us three here…”

An uncloaking sound suddenly came from behind him. Richard turned with his Pretty Boy’s Pocket Pistol in hand and aimed it at the uncloaking spy. He lowered it once he noticed who it was; François.

“Bravo kid,” He slowly clapped, taking the scout’s seat. “Not only you noticed that there was a spy here, you’re also really late on getting that document signed.”

“What do you mean?” the Bostonian replaced the pistol into his pocket.

“I mean that we—all of us on the Lunar team—have already signed this sheet of the document. Your fellow teammates all elected you to become the one to sign for everyone—it was you, Jacques, or Arvin. So either way, you were going to be here one way or another,” He grinned, but it slowly turned into a frown as he crossed his legs. “Do you know where the restroom is? It just happens that I’ve been standing here for a very long time with my Cloak n’ Dagger.”

“Out the room, take a left and it’s the fourth door on the right,” the brown stallion replied. He turned towards Richard. “I only want your signature because not only it’s a game based on the battles, but mainly because it features you guys and that would be copyright law seeing how that there’s plush toys of your group.”

“Does that even exist here?” he replied, snatching a ball of yarn from Leroy’s desk. The unicorn nodded. “Wow, didn’t think it would. Anyways, just give me the paper and I’ll be on my way so you and Roxy can talk.”

“Very well,” Leroy reached over his desk and handed to thin packet of stapled papers. “The place where you sign is at the very back, last page actually, and that’s where you sign for our usage of the battle’s looks.”

The human skipped to the back, not even taking a quick skim of the contents, and wrote in what he calls ‘professional handwriting’. Richard handed it back and walked to the exit, where it was wide open from the spy’s sudden exit. The receptionist took a quick glance towards him, but changed her gaze back towards the typewriter.

Tak, tak, tak, tak, tak, tak… “So was your visit today?” Grace said, continuously typing on the machine. “Hopefully it was delightful.”

“It was,” He put his hand on chin and rubbed it. “Not too bad, but really business like and not really a friendly chat.”

She stopped. “That’s Leroy Jenkinson for you. Ever since he gained the CEO portion of his life, he has been focused on the job rather than his social life. But whenever he’s not on the job, or on break, he turns into his old self; the playful stallion who had interests in what young kids would like. He still is a kid, that’s why his co-CEO is his sister.”

A creak of the couch changed Richard’s focus. He looked and saw François sitting next to him. “Missed me?” Richard asked.

“You have no idea my friend,” the Frenchman smiled. “No idea.”

“So,” Richard stretched himself out on the couch. “Are you ready to be sent home?”

“We’re not going until next week,” François replied as he pulled out a cigarette from his case. “Even then, that’s going to be a long time.”

“Who’s taking you?”

“The same chimera that’s taking you guys,” He lit the stick and blew a stream of light grey smoke. “Dammit Discord, why couldn’t he have taken our teams together? I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t make a difference that we went together.”

“I’m pretty sure he can make all kinds of shit happen,” Richard waved the smoke out of his face. “I bet you that the second after we appear back at Harvest, or Teufort, you guys are going to appear as though nothing had ever happened.”

“Yea, but what time is he going to exactly take us to?” François tapped his ashes into a nearby ashtray. “It could be fucking two years after the contract, or even the next Australian Christmas. We don’t even know when we’re going to be back unless we had some calendar.”

“I still got my phone,” the Bostonian raised a flat, rectangular object from his pocket. “Well, it’s more like a pager than anything; but Ms. Pauling gave it to me for some reason.”

“You mean that slim woman with glasses and black hair?” the spy asked, putting out the burning tobacco.

“I always thought it was like a dark brown,” Richard removed his backpack and placed it on the ground. “Anyways, she gave it to me about twenty days after I invited her over for a date.”

“How’d it go?”

“It could’ve gone better, if that giant bread monster didn’t come by and ruin everything,” Richard looked at the door and found Roxy walking out, licking her lips. “I guess I’ll talk to you next time we meet again.”

François laughed and removed his mask, revealing his sharp chin, black hair, and slightly pointed nose. “It’s been a while since I’ve removed my mask. Even then I’ve only removed it because I needed to shower,” He scratched his short hair. “It feels so weird to have my mask off.”

“Wow, it’s like Jacques was your brother or something,” Richard studied the man’s face.

“Jacques and I were co-workers back when we studied biochemistry for a hobby,” He replaced the mask and adjusted it to fit. “It wasn’t until recently that we had an argument about a small petty thing that it was decided that espionage work was the better idea.”

“Well, I ought to go now with Roxy,” Richard stood along with the Frenchman. “See you back at Teufort bud.”

“Good-bye,” François replied with a wave, and headed towards the door.

“How much of a close friend was François do you think?” Roxy said behind the Bostonian as the Frenchman closed the door behind him.

“I’d say if anything, he was a good friend,” Richard bent down and petted the affectionate changeling. “Now let’s go do something, we still have daylight to burn,” His stomach growled. “And maybe let’s go get something at that restaurant I saw on the way here.”

(…)

“I’ll have a hay-burger with large fries and a fizzy drink,” the stallion said in front of the two.

“That’ll be eight bits,” The purple mare with a hat at the register replied. She took the bits as the stallion moved out of the way. “Next.”

“Hey there,” Richard said, resting his hands on the counter. “I’ll take the griffon option with water. Make sure the meat is well cooked, humans can’t digest that. And she’ll just take some chocolate milk.”

“That’ll be err,” She lifted a sheet of paper from under the counter. “Hmm… That’ll be twelve bits.”

“…” Richard looked at her with a blank expression. “…You mean to tell me that the griffon option is more expensive than the order the freaking pony before us had? Are you speciesist against me?” He said loudly, purposely trying to make a scene

“No, no!” She replied quickly, shaking her hoofs in defense. “I-I didn’t mean that! Sorry if you got that idea, but it’s just that your order of the griffon option was only nine bits for a meal and the milk is three bits; we’re running low on the drink, so it’s slightly more expensive,” she blushed and scratched the back of her head. “It’s only a bit more expensive because it’s real meat instead of hay.”

“Uh-huh,” Richard smirked. “I’m just giving you a hard time. I knew the actual price, except the chocolate milk, that’s new.” He placed the credit on the table. “So how long will it be until I get my burger?”

“Five, six minutes maximum,” The mare placed the bits into the register. “Just wait nearby the stallion over there with this,” She handed him a card with a number, and then placed a brown carton on the counter. “And here’s your chocolate milk.”

Roxy grabbed the milk and stood next to the Bostonian. “So is this your first time coming here?”

“No, it’s my second time, and I’ve ordered the exact same thing before,” Richard looked at his number. “I’m number one apparently, I’m usually listed second.”

“Why second?” Roxy placed a small straw into the side of her drink.

“Because Jane stole my spot when they were listing us,” He chuckled. “Just as simple as that, he stole my spot when I supposed to be first.”

“So what do you plan on doing about it?”

“Nothing, just suck it up and deal with it. Like that time when Demoman decided to go on a drinking binge during a battle at a place named Dustbowl. He found a sword, the Eyelander, and started to decapitate the whole RED team. It was pretty traumatizing to watch; I thought I was never going to sleep again,” Richard said, retrieving a tray with his burger. “We kind of fixed his problem, until he accidentally launched a rocket—while finding a bottle of rum somewhere. Tavish took it out with the same sword he used to decapitate the RED team,” He slapped himself on the head. “And it wasn’t until my dumbass-self decided that touching the sword was a good idea! It sent the rocket back to fly mode and it hit our freight facility and blew up.” Richard tuned his head as he heard his number being called. He quickly grabbed his plate of food, and headed to a nearby booth of seats.

“That was real smart of you to do such a thing,” Roxy replied sarcastically. She then walked towards a table and sat down with the human. “So what do you want to do for the rest of the day?”

“I don’t know,” Richard bit into the meat burger, surprised by the amount of juiciness. “I’m already packed and everything. One thing I was wondering though, is it possible that I could take a changeling larvae and raise it?”

The changeling shrugged. “You could Celestia about it. You can talk to her if Spike’s nearby.”

“Any advice if I can?”

“Eventually, it’ll need to eat love,” she started. “The most common way is to feed off of the host which they’re getting love off of. That requires blood, but if you’re rational about it, the least a changeling actually needs is only about an ounce of blood,” Richard shrugged. “It’s not too much, but they’ll only need it about once a week. Now if you give them about a cup, they’re good for a month but that’s stretching it. A pint and they’re pretty much full for two months, and so on so forth.”

“Is there a second option?” He asked, drinking from the fairly large cup of water.

“Yea,” Roxy smiled. “And that’s the chocolate option; you feed them about an ounce of blood. That should satisfy them for about a month if you feed them a bar of chocolate—given from whomever to them—about once a day. Sometimes you could skip a day, but that’ll make them cranky.”

“Sounds like you know a lot about care of a changeling when it comes to feeding,” Richard wiped his face with a napkin.

“How’d you think I’ve survived this whole time?” Roxy chuckled as she threw her carton to a nearby trashcan. “Did you think I’ve survived on nothing but blood from random people this whole time?”

He shrugged, “I thought you guys lived off of emotions and usual things.”

“That’s kind of the truth,” The changeling shuffled her hooves. “Some changelings grow to be ‘normal’—they live like regular ponies—and others live to be emotion feeding—they’ll feed of the host until they’re nothing but husks of meat. But you are most likely not going to worry about them being emotional feeding, that’s normally Ferals and lower grunts.”

“But don’t Ferals slaughter their victims?”

“They do, then they feed off of the emotions kept within the blood,” She sighed and hugged Richard’s leg. “I was going to become a Feral until I made my first slaughter, then I realized that wasn’t the life I was meant to have. I eventually hung around with Elites and accepted their way of life—which was to live off of the smallest amounts available. It was hard to do, but if I didn’t do that, then I wouldn’t have met you.”

“I just called up a random changeling to help me by bringing a wheelchair,” Richard admitted. “That day went by really fast for some odd reason.”

“Wait, I thought Arvin said he asked for my help?” Roxy squinted her eyes as she slowly realized the situation. “You mean to tell me that it was you that called for help?”

“Yea, but I only called for just general help about five minutes before I fell into the wheelchair,” Richard pointed to the door, notifying the changeling that he was going to leave. He placed the tray of trash on the trashcan nearby. “Then I asked for the wheelchair in case I get too tired.”

Roxy sighed as she opened the door to head out of the restaurant. “So we met out of luck? That’s got to be the most life-changing moment of anyone’s life.”

He smiled. “You can say it was a changeling in atmosphere!” He weakly laughed as she slowly shook her head. “No?”

“Don’t ever make a pun like that again,” Roxy walked towards an apple stand, where a light yellow filly stood. “Hey there, I’ll take two apples.”

“Okay,” she replied, grabbing two bright-red fruits. “That’ll be two bits!”

“Thanks Applejack’s sister,” The changeling placed the bits on the filly’s hooves and grabbed the fruit. “Hey Richard! How good are ya at catching?” She pitched an apple.

“What do y-,” He stopped as the fruit hit him square on the chest. “Oh crap that hurts worse than a glass bulb.”

“How about another?” She yelled as she threw the other apple.

The scout looked up at the oncoming apple as it came close to his face. He flinched, but opened his eyes as heard a whoosh sound in front of his face. He looked around, and saw an arrow lodged in a nearby sign of ‘Quills and Sofas’.

“You’re welcome mate!” An Australian voice yelled to his right. “Next time, learn how to dodge!”

Richard clutched his chest as he brushed the broken apple pieces off. “What was that for?” He yelled at the smiling changeling.

“I just saw Nick over there with his Huntsman on his shoulder and decided that he should be able to hit moving targets,” The Australian waved and walked up to them. “He missed the first shot and hit someone’s sofa over there then the apple hit you on the chest. He hit the second one, but it went through the apple and hit the sign.”

“You threw it too fast the first time Roxy,” Nick slung his bow over his shoulder. He then looked at his Rolex; quarter after three. “I was just walking around to tell our teammates that we should be over at Fluttershy’s in about forty minutes. I’m going to head on over since I’ve nothing better to do.” He turned around and started to walk away with favorite coffee mug in hand, not caring about the arrow still lodged into a pony’s sofa and on the sign.

“We’ll be there!” Roxy yelled as she helped up Richard. “Well, I guess we should follow him. I should get a thing of coffee or some candy, would be good to have at that time.”

(….)

Arvin stood at the door as the pair came up to the cottage. “What took you so long? The girls, and couple guys, have been waiting for everyone to appear so that they can reveal our ‘go away present’,” he quoted with his fingers.

“Well, sorry,” Roxy said sarcastically, placing a brown paper bag on the ground. “Just went grabbing some things like coffee, and maybe some snacks.”

“Well, what’d you get?” The German peered into the bag. He smiled. “Nice to know that candy and potato chips were most of the few things inside this bag.”

“Yea, couldn’t decide what kind of chips to get,” Richard shrugged, grabbing a bag labeled, ‘Spicy Stuff’. “This sounded great at the time, but I think either me or Jennifer are going to be the only ones that’ll eat it.”

“I’ll maybe try it,” Arvin knocked the door and waited until a small crack appeared.

“H-hello?” A small and quiet voice spoke behind the door, barely past a whisper. “Is everyone here?”

“Yes Fluttershy,” Arvin lightly pushed the door open and entered the naturalist’s cottage. He then turned around and cupped his hands around his mouth to create a loudspeaker-like thing. “Guys, we can go inside now.”

The rest of the seven mercenaries—more like just regular humans—stood from various places around the house and walked towards the building entrance. Richard and Roxy looked at each other and shrugged before entering the woody living room. Sharp, sweet smelling incense flooded the humans’, and changeling’s, sense of smell and awoken them up with sudden adrenaline. Fluttershy smiled and presented several couches and chair scattered around in an audience-like position.

“Please,” Fluttershy picked up a napping rabbit from one of the chairs, and placed it in a nearby basket. “Sit here. The other ponies will be out here in about a couple minutes.” She opened the door behind her that lead into her room, and slipped inside without letting any of the humans see what’s behind.

Fluttershy closed the door behind her, and without a second thought, locked it. A wave of doubt washed over her as she thought the humans might judge her for not being trustworthy of them. She shrugged it off, gotten this far, might as well go with it.

“Hey Fluttershy,” Twilight said behind the pegasus. “Are they out there yet?”

“Yes,” She turned and smiled. “And I think we should go ahead and show them our presents!”

“Yes, yes,” Rarity happily said from her spot. “I should go out first and amaze Jacques with this fantastic present!” She pulled out a vanilla colored suit that looked it should belong to fancy gentleman’s nightly garment, complete with a small puff-like bulge of cloth nearby the neck. “He told me that he wanted something similar to this, so I made him one!” She gleamed.

“That’s… wow!” Twilight looked at the suit. “How’d you make it all today?”

“Well,” Rarity started. “I sort of worked on this for the past three days; this was the second day I actually worked on it in terms of sewing on the pieces and accessorizing.”

“Good!” Fluttershy grinned. “Is everyone pretty much done?”

Pinkie held up a small purse-like bag with a yellow flower on it. “Yeppers!” She nodded her head frantically.

“How about you two stallions,” Fluttershy peered over Spike’s and Big Macintosh’s shoulders.

Spike pulled the object he was working on close to his chest and covered it. “I uh, I’m almost done.”

Big Mac revealed a small head of a robotic changeling. “Eeyup,” He said, grabbing the dangling chain connected to the top of the head.

“That’s uh, nice?” Twilight raised a brow then shook her head. “So let’s get ready to reveal our gifts!”

Fluttershy walked to the door and opened it, revealing the mercenaries playing another game of poker with hats scattered around the table. She coughed quietly, getting their attentions. “Every one of us has made a present for you guys, and uh, we’re about to give them to you.”

“About bloody time,” Nick grunted, crossing his arms and legs. “So who’s going to be first?”

“I am,” Fluttershy said as she walked to her German counterpart brown pack. She then placed the package at his legs and smiled. “Open it!”

Arvin looked at her then picked it up. He chuckled as he ripped the top of and peered into the bag. He gasped, and pulled out a modified medipack. It was white, but instead of the usual blue cross, it was designed with Fluttershy’s cutie mark, and the electrical prongs on top of the pack were replaced with neon pink ones. Arvin smiled and hugged the shy pony, making her squeak like a rubber duck.

“It’s great!” He said. “Thanks.”

Fluttershy nuzzled into his chest and closed her eyes. “Next,” she said, not removing herself from his grasp.

Big Macintosh walked out of the room holding the robotic head from the chain. “Hrmf if fur oh,” He muffled through the chain in his mouth. He dropped it on Mikhail’s lap. “There,”

“What’s it for?” The heavy replied, scratching his head.

“It’s a small decoration for Sasha,” The stallion said. “You just wrap it around the minigun barrel a couple times to hold it there, and it should make a nice addition to it.”

The Russian smiled. “Thanks for gift friend.”

“Eeyup,” He smiled back. “I reckon it’s my sister’s turn.”

“Darn right it is,” Applejack appeared holding a toolbox on her back. “Dell, Ah made this from some scrap you had and I think it’s great for you!” She, somehow by any means of physics, tossed the box from her back and watched as it landed in front of her.

“What does it do?” Dell pressed the button on the tool box and watched as it constructed itself. As quickly as it started, it finished and ended once it looked like a lain back lawn chair. A small table propped itself on the right side. The engineer sat on the chair and studied the design.

“You’re supposed to lay back and have a mug of cider or two,” Applejack gave him a bottle of Blue Streak and placed a couple on the stand. “I call it, Relaxer!”

“I got a better name,” He sighed and relaxed with his left hand behind his head. “Let’s call it Rancho Relaxo. Oh and thanks for this, I’m going to use it a lot.”

“Ah was never really good at making up names,” Applejack replied. She smiled. “And you’re welcome; next pony!”

Pinkie walked out of the room and jumped on top of Jennifer’s lap. She then revealed her gift of the purse. “I made it just for you! We pyros know what’s up.”

Jennifer chuckled. “Thanks pinks. I also made you a present,” She reached behind her.

Pinkie gasped dramatically and pressed her cheeks in with her hooves. “Thankyou-thankyou-thankyou-thankyou-thankyou-thankyou!” She grinned and hugged the human.

“No problem,” Jennifer smiled and lightly pushed away the pony. The pyro then pulled out a small, white, and furry ball. “Here, it’s the biggest secret that I’ve got and I think that it’s about time that he belongs to someone special.”

“You mean I’m your best friend?” the pony’s smile got larger.

“Yep, and this guy here, his name is Cloudpaw,” She placed the small ball into Pinkie’s hooves. “Take care of him; he was one of the only kittens that I rescued out of a burning kitten orphanage.”

“D’aww,” the pony cooed. “Don’t worry little guy, you’re mine now.” The ball opened up to reveal the small kitten’s features; everything ordinary of a kitten except a small nick on the right ear.

“Oh thank you Jennifer,” The pony smiled, and placed the small bundle into her hair. “And don’t worry about him inside my mane, it’s like a blanket and a nest inside there,” she giggled. “Come on Dashie! It’s your turn!”

“Do I really have to?” The usually narcissistic pony slowly glided to Richard and set herself down at his feet. “I’m still pissed at you for not getting here like the others. So I made you a gift in case you’re mad at me too.”

Richard patted the top of the pony’s head. “Oh well, shit happens,” Suddenly, without warning, he picked up the pegasus and turned her around, facing her back. He then stood and raised the pony high above his head. “Ahh-se-venya, Mama-ne-chababa! Seji-woo! When-naah-ah, when-naa-ma!” The Bostonian chanted

“Could you please put the poor pony down and accept her gift?” Jennifer slapped his back, making him jerk forward. “And she’s not a lion cub! Isn’t it time that you think The Lion King is old?”

“And don’t forget about the copyright infringement!” Pinkie commented as almost all eyes looked at her. “What? It has to be mentioned every now and then.”

“Oh shush, she enjoys this! Don’t you, you purty pony?” Richard looked back at Rainbow Dash and realized that he was holding her upside down. She crossed her forelegs. “Oops.” He set her down and sat down. “Alright, gift time,” He rubbed his hands together.

“Here,” Dash said, placing a small parcel on his lap. “It’s just things that I thought would be nice for you.”

Richard ripped away the brown paper to reveal three objects. He picked one up and analyzed it; an azure blue, uncut, opaque, rock. “What is this, a sapphire?” He took a closer look at the gem.

“No you numb-nuts!” Dash barked. “It’s a Lapis Lazuli! It was given by my mother when I turned eighteen.”

“And when was that?” Richard polished the gem on his shirt and picked up a small patch that had a lightning bolt with wings. “Nice emblem here.”

“Thanks, and I turned eighteen about…” The pegasus put a hoof on her chin, and turned towards the pony pyro. “When did I turn into eighteen?”

“Your birthday was about a couple weeks ago,” Pinkie mentioned. “But even then I didn’t know how old you were. Fluttershy’s the oldest of all six of us.” The said pegasus glared daggers at her. “And she’s only about two years older than me; I’m twenty-two by the way.”

“Wow,” Dash turned back to Richard. “I got the emblem from the Wonderbolts Academy when I was a part of it.” She picked up the last object; a picture of herself with a signature. “Here, you stupid human,” She handed the photo to him.

“…Why this?” Richard looked and studied the photo; just her in a pose in front of a yellow background. He sighed. “Never mind, I like it. It’s good enough to keep actually,” If my brothers don’t sneak into my room and see this. He thought.

“Good!” Dash hugged him. “Can the next pony go before I end up killing this guy of hugs?”

“Yes of course!” Rarity walked out with the suit on a hanger, all of it covered with a plastic bag. She handed it to Jacques and smiled. “I made this suit for you! I know how much you liked the fancy sleepwear in the magazines I have in my lobby.”

“Why do… never mind,” Dash replied.

“What? I only have them for fashion ideas, and in case somebody wants something based on something,” Rarity defended.

“It’s nice actually,” Jacques removed his outer suit and replaced it with Rarity’s. He then adjusted it for his lithe frame. “And it’s very comfortable.” He sat back down, legs crossed.

“I’m glad you like it!” Rarity smiled and decided to lie in his lap. “So how about the next pony?”

“I’ll go,” Twilight walked next to Nick and just jumped to his lap.

“So uh, no gift like the others I assume at least?” The Australian spoke.

“Yep,” She yawned. “I used a spell to turn all your hats and equipment to an unusual status and they’re all strangified.”

Everyone’s mouth dropped—except for Roxy, oblivious what that means—and Nick just blinked.

“You’re not happy about it?” Twilight’s lower lip stuck out. “I knew it.”

“No-no-no!” Nick waved his arms. “It’s just that, wow! You went above and beyond to give me such a thing! It really shows me how much I mean to you!” It’s bloody brilliant! Totally faking it, I’m totally faking it.

“I understand how you feel, it’s a huge shocker to you, for me to do such a thing,” Twilight’s eyes gleamed then turned her head towards the general crowd of humans. “I’m glad you came here and helped us, we wouldn’t even be here if it wasn’t for you guys!” She smiled. “Alright Spike, it’s your turn!”

The small, purple drake appeared, holding a wooden box. “Hey Jane Doe,” Spike said nervously. “I made you something.”

“Well bring it over here cadet,” the American replied, waving him over.

The dragon practically dragged his feet just to reach the rocket jumper, and handed the box over. Jane looked at the outside, “So you gave a block of wood, anything else?”

“You have to open it,” Spike said, pointing to a small latch, barely connecting the two halves.

The solder flipped it and pulled the lid apart. Inside it was a barber’s razorblade, a pipe made specifically for smoking tobacco, and a black object connected to pin.

Jane held up the black object, “What is this?” He asked, with a curious look.

“It’s supposed to be a medal to you for no specific reason,” Spike rubbed his arm. “And the other things were stuff that I thought you would find perfect later on.”

Jane smiled. “Thanks Spike,” The patted the top of the drake’s head and attempted to tussle his hair. “I appreciate it.”

“I believe it’s my turn to give gifts to my dear comrade,” An enthralling voice spoke from the bedroom door. “And it’s about time that it is to be had. Anyways, I was busy working on this one specific potion for the longest time! And thanks to Tavish over here, after this, I’ll never have to rhyme ever again!”

“I thought we had that taken care of?” Tavish rubbed his nose and grabbed a bottle of rum from the crate sitting next to him. “Want another?”

“I calmly refuse your offer Scot,” Zecora pulled out a swirling blue potion from her side pouch, popped the lid, and sipped on it. “Maybe later I’ll take a shot,” She handed the potion to the Scotsman. “Take a sip, and I’ll be cured of my troubles. Besides, this is my gift to you.”

Tavish shrugged and drank more than half of the potion. “Aye, that’s stronger than my rum here! What is that stuff?”

“It’s rum,” the zebra smiled, “and it’s also mixed with cream, a type of herb, and vanillin.”

“Bloody hell,” Tavish smiled and drank the rest of the liquor. “That’s some good drink!” He licked his lips. “Thanks mate!”

“No problem Tavish,” The zebra then looked at Applejack. “And you’re an orange, so you better act like some.”

The farm pony glared and looked away. “That ain’t right,” She mumbled.

Fluttershy walked from her lap-sitting and stood in front of her fireplace, where she could see everybody and possibly get their attention. “Hey everyone,” She yelled as loud as she can—which could be mistaken as common outdoor talk, “Can I please have your attention if you don’t mind.”
“I would like to say thank you for these stallions that are with us today,” Fluttershy said. “We would love to have you come back someday again. Maybe tomorrow, maybe next year, who knows?” She smiled as she felt her eyes slightly water. “But I would like to thank Arvin, who became a parenting figure in my life now.”

The German smiled, and Fluttershy continued. “But I just wanna let you nine know that we couldn’t have done it without you,” The pegasus turned and pulled out her signature oil burner. “So here’s to everybody!”

Tavish immediately stood, forgetting that Zecora was just sitting in his lap, and raised his bottle of rum. “To our homeland,” He yelled.

“To friends,” Twilight joined.

“To life,” Arvin said.

“And least of all,” Applejack started. “To family.” She smiled and looked around.

The humans moaned and shook their heads. “Now who’s being the sappy one?” Jacques smirked. “And here I thought Arvin was going to make the cheesiest comment.”

Applejack frowned and sat back down in gloom. “Hey, it’s okay,” Dell patted her back and scratched her head. “We’re just giving you a hard time. But if I were you, then I might need to take a bottle of one of the beers.”

The farm pony grabbed the liquor from his hand and took a drink. Her mouth felt the aftertaste, “It’s not actually that bad, though it’s a bit more fermented than my ciders I make.”

Tavish grabbed her shoulders and shook her. “You make good scrumpy?” He asked. “I want some.”

“I’ll be sure to ask, if I can’t help it, Discord to see if he can teleport a barrel to you before you leave,” The Scotsman’s mouth watered.

“Actually,” the chimera’s voice spoke from Fluttershy’s room, behind her door. “I will, after I’ve had a barrel also. I wonder what alcohol is like, never decided to have one my entire life.”

“Not to be a douche about this,” Richard pointed to his watch. “But we don’t have much time left.”

“Aw come on!” Dash whined. “Can’t we just be together for another hour?” She thrust her lower up out and put on her best begging face.

“Nope!” Discord chuckled, lifting the pegasus off of his lap and taped a large dress hanger to her. “But the one thing you should do is that maybe you can do one favor for me.” Dash blinked once after seeing a twinkle in the chimera’s eyes, only for it to disappear. “I want you to-“

“Discord! What did I tell you about doing things like that?” Fluttershy scolded. “It’s not being nice and you know it.”

He frowned, and hung the pony on a nearby rack. Dash tried to flail her body around to remove the stiff object, but to no avail. Fluttershy raised an eyebrow. Discord groaned and snapped his fingers. “The things that I do for a good friend,” He muttered as Rainbow Dash fell to the ground, in a frenzied attack against the coat hanger.

“You know Skittles,” Richard snatched the hanger from under her. “This is on the endangered species list and you should feel ashamed that you tried to kill an innocent hanger.” Dash rolled her eyes at the remark.

“It’s sad I couldn’t throw a farewell party to my good friends,” Pinkie yawned and rolled to her back. “But I’m just too pooped.”

“Aren’t we all,” Nick smirked and adjusted the strap on his huntsman. “Now let’s get bloody going before the other team ends up having to wait for us.”

“I’m with ya on that one,” Richard leaped from his spot and opened the door to be met with a large, blue, and muscular minotaur. “Yo, move out of the way,” he said, trying to get past.

The minotaur didn’t budge. “What did you just say to me, pipsqueak?” He prodded the scout’s chest.

“I said move!” The Bostonian pulled out his Sandman and swung to the beast’s abdomen. The minotaur doubled over, and got hit again at the back. “Now move before I make sure your face hurts!” Richard spat as the creature fell on the ground.

“Stop!” Fluttershy yelled from inside her house, rushing towards them. “That’s a friend of mine, Iron Will!”

“Whoops,” Richard shrugged his shoulders, and poked the minotaur with his bat. “Sorry, but I gotta go.” The scout ran past Iron Will as he groaned on the ground.

“Didn’t know the humans were so,” He coughed, “brutish.”

“It’s okay, go lie down on my couch,” Fluttershy rolled his back over and attempted to pull him inside the house. “Hey heavy, think you can help me with this?”

“No problem,” The Russian walked next to the creature and picked him up. “I’ll take him to couch,” The nodded his head towards the village. “You worry about heading over to town.”

The pegasus smiled. “Thanks,” she said as she started to walk with her pony friends. “So, when do you actually think that they’re going to be back?” Fluttershy said to Twilight.

“I don’t know, but I doubt that Princess Luna actually remembers how she’d summoned them,” Twilight pondered.

“We could always ask her,” Fluttershy sighed and watched as the humans a couple meters in front of them talk happily. “It’s like he’s already gone.”

“Don’t worry,” Twilight stopped and hugged the shy pegasus. “Just know that they’ll remember us too with the gifts we’ve given them.”

Fluttershy chuckled, and wiped the oncoming tears away. “I’m pretty sure Nick will remember your gift.”

The alicorn laughed in reply and started back on the dirt path. “Let’s go, before Mikhail gets there before us.”

(……)

Discord yawned as he stretched his body out on a chair inside Sugarcube Corner. The main door swung open, to reveal Richard holding his bat on his shoulder. “Hey Discord,” He said, sitting down on the couch next to him. “Were you serious about rebuilding your race or something?”

The chimera sighed. “Yep,” He spawned a very frothy chocolate milkshake with a snap of his fingers. “I’ve travelled the world to find out what happened to our empire—we even ruled this country—but found nothing except artifacts pertaining to my petrification.”

“Well,” Richard replied. “You always try and do self-fertilization.” The Bostonian cursed himself for ever learning that word, mainly because of multiple explanations of the Red Pyro.

The chimera gasped in realization. “Why have I never thought of that?” He clasped his head with his hands. Discord then grabbed the human and shook him. “You’ve completely saved our race!” He guffawed as he held Richard in the air.

“Uh, you’re welcome?”

“How will I ever repay you?” Discord’s yellow eyes glowed with happiness. “I can give you anything; anything! Just tell me what you want, and it will be yours!”

Richard swallowed. “C-can you uh,” He looked away, nervous.

“Can I what?” the chimera pulled him closer. “You don’t even have to say it too loud; just whisper it into my ear, and the task will be done.”

Richard bit his lip and thought about it. “I want uh,” He leaned in and whispered in Discord’s ear.

“Oh?” He grinned, and made sure that his tooth gleamed brighter than room itself. “That’s what you want?” Discord chuckled. “I’ll be sure that it’s done. A deal’s a deal.” He snapped his fingers and a faint pink aura surrounded his hand then changed to green.

“That’s odd,” Discord fondled with his white beard with the other hand, leaving Richard to hover in midair. “It seems like the spell that I casted was null.”

“You mean,” Richard frowned. “It’ll never work?”

“Let me try a different way,” the chimera smirked and snapped his fingers again to create another pink aura. He then threw the aura straight at the young man. Richard drew in a breath as he felt a force push against his chest. “Now,” Discord smiled. “How does that feel?”

“It hurts like hell,” He coughed as he was gently placed back on the chair.

“Good!” The door opened again to reveal the rest of the group. “Welcome! No more sitting!” He spread his arms wide and laughed.

“Great, now we wait,” Jennifer commented as she entered the door, and then saw Richard on the chair. “Looks like you just saw some things, then was forced to do it at the same time; like having to do the human centipede.”

Richard gagged. “That’s disgusting; I really hope that never happens to anybody.” He stood, clutching his chest. “I had a spell hit me by Discord,” He looked at the pyromancer, and saw that she was standing closer. “Are you okay?”

“I-I’m not sure,” She backed away, blushing. “It’s like something is trying to force me to do something, but I don’t know what it is.” Jennifer shook her head. “It’s probably nothing.”

“Alright everybody,” Discord’s voice echoed in the building. “Do you have all of your things together? If not, then just ask me to get it.”

Suddenly, everyone raised their hand, reminded that they forgot the run home to grab it. “I knew you would forget them,” Discord once again snapped his fingers, instantly making the bags appear. “So I brought them here and ready. So who’s first?”

Jane Doe walked up first with a larger backpack than the Cozy Camper and a bag in hand. He then turned around to face everybody, and saluted. “Last one out, lock the door!” He yelled as he turned around to face the chimera.

Discord clicked his tongue twice, making a round, and blue, spiraling circle with a black hole in the middle appear next to him. The soldier then jumped into the hole, instantly disappearing as his body went completely through.

“Decided not to wait for us?” An elegant and benevolent voice spoke at the door way.

“The soldier wanted to leave first, and soon,” Discord replied, smirking. “But Celestia, maybe if you were here earlier, then we wouldn’t have to worry about it.”

“We had trouble back in the hotel room,” Luna looked at her sister with frustration. “If only somepony could at least be more organized with her materials.”

Princess Celestia sighed. “I didn’t pack my suitcase this time Lulu!” The alicorn said. “And you know how busy I usually am during the day.”

“Please ‘Tia,” she rolled her eyes. “I just woke up mere moments ago and I still got more ready than you.” Celestia only growled in response.

“Girls, girls,” Arvin raised his hands up and separated the two by standing in the middle. “If you two don’t calm down, I’ll have to ask Mikhail to do so.”

The said human walked into the building, standing behind the German.

Luna scoffed. “We shall see about that,” She looked around the room, not knowing whose name belongs to whom. “Now who is this Mikhail?”

“I am,” The Russian pointed a thumb at his chest. “I am Mikhail.”

Luna looked at the large, bulky human and shook her head. “If only I had guards that were so built,” she muttered. “Very well; please draconequus, if you may continue.”

Discord pointed to the portal once again, and saw that Jacques was standing next to him. The spy sighed, “If only I could come back and visit once a while.”

“You can, but it requires a certain qualification to do so,” the chimera replied. He then handed Jacques a yellow stone marked with the chaos symbol on it; a circle with four large arrows pointed up, down, left, and right, and four smaller arrows between each of the large arrows. “Just think of this as a way to call my name, similar to a human’s telephone back in your world.”

Jacques nodded, knowing that this was like a similar way of calling the devil. “How do I activate it?”

“It’s already in your bag as a note,” Discord said, pointing to the suitcase.

The Frenchman smiled, and entered into the portal carrying his luggage. Similar to what happened to Jane, Jacques walked into it and completely disappeared once walking through. “Anyone else want my stone?” Discord raised the yellow stone that rested in his talon. “I will guarantee that it will bring you back here for a visit. Anytime, from anywhere, I will bring you here.”

Richard shrugged his shoulders and motioned the chimera to put it in his bag. The Bostonian then walked up to the portal. “I’ll miss you guys, for a while until I want to come back for a visit,” he said. He took a step, but was interrupted by a pony latching onto his leg.

“Can you at least say good-bye and give me a hug before you leave?” Roxy asked, rubbing on his calf.

Richard smiled, and leaned down to hug crying changeling. “It’s okay,” He cooed. “I’ll be back soon, maybe next year, maybe next month. But I’ll be back. I will be back.”

And set of legs surrounded the human; he looked and saw Dash with a pleading look in her eyes. “Pinkie promise?” She asked, feeling her eyes slightly water.

The Bostonian chuckled, “Yea sure.” Richard stuck out his pinkie and lodged it into Dash’s forehead, “I pinkie promise that I’ll come back and that I’ll bring me some chicken too.”

A knock on the door caught everyone’s attention. “Hey uh, human,” Rogue’s voice could be heard just barely outside the door. “You never told me what the food you gave me was.”

He chuckled, “It’s fried chicken, a type of specialty we humans have.” Rogue’s subtle gagging sounds could be heard. “And don’t worry about it, as long as you don’t end up eating the hard parts which are the bones.”

Richard stepped closer to the portal, and lightly pushed the ponies off of him. “You can’t come with, it’s too dangerous for creatures like you,” Richard adjusted his hat and threw his luggage into the spiraling vortex. “Hey guys, see you on the other side,” and with that statement, he leaped into the portal.

Arvin stepped up to the vortex and also threw his bags into it. He then adjusted his glasses and looked at Celestia. “I have a feeling you are going to say something,” He chuckled. “But what’s stopping you?”

The princess looked at the medic, then to the rest of the mercenaries. “I used to have a slight school filly crush on you, but whatever was there is now gone,” She sighed, feeling the stinging pain of admittance in her words.

“I knew it,” Arvin stated, straightening his back. “I knew something was different about you whenever I’m nearby. Very well, I must go now.” He quickly hopped to the alicorn and hugged her. Celestia sighed in delight as she finally felt what the humans did to each other, but something she never received.

Arvin jumped into the portal, instantly getting swallowed up by the slight tug of an invisible force pulling him. His vision went bright as he knew that he entered the portal. He closed his eyes for a moment to stop an unusual wind from drying out his eyes. And once he opened them, he was being pushed out of the vertex and landed at what looked similar to the BLU team’s headquarters. Arvin looked up, and saw Richard holding a hand out to help him up.

“Hey,” Richard said, pulling the medic up. “What’s up doc?”

The German tilted his hand back and forth. “It was a delightful experience, don’t you think?”

“Yea, it was decent,” Jane commented, looking at his ‘medal’ that he was given the by the dragon. The American sighed. “He was a fine cadet.”

“Don’t worry Solly,” Richard patted his back and looked around. “Hey, where’s Jacques?”

“He left,” the soldier commented. “France decided to go and check up on any updates to the systems to make sure the companies just didn’t shut down or anything. He’s more concerned about his job more than anything.”

“Where is he right now?”

“He should be in the control room…”

(….)

“Fuck!” Jacques muttered under his breath. “How could this happen? I thought they completely hated each other?” He spoke to himself, until he heard the doorway open. “What do you want?”

“Hey spy,” Richard replied, standing next to him. “I just wanted to know how you were doing.”

“I’m doing decent,” He replied, pressing several buttons on the panels. “I just need to understand one more thing.”

“Which is?”

“It’s that the companies are now one and we’re practically just a delivery service,” The Frenchman rubbed his chin. “But another strange phenomenon happened; a new company named Grey Mann has appeared and decided to try and take over our company. Or more like take it down.”

“So what do you want to do?” Richard played with a butterfly knife, Pink Rose, a knife he looted off of a backstabbed spy. “I mean, we can’t do anything until our team shows up.”

“We’ll wait,” Jacques chuckled. “And once they all appear, we brief them the news, and then start up a defensive line.”

“How?” Richard motioned the area around them. “We don’t have any idea how they’ll attack!”

“We can always do one thing,” Jacques lit a cigarette as Jennifer appeared, holding her Powerjack. “We can always do what we had done back in Stalliongrad.”

Richard smiled and threw his last cube of ‘Bazooka!’ bubblegum into his mouth. He watched as Engineer appeared through the vortex, holding his Strangely, Genuine Widowmaker over his shoulder. “Might as well get started,” the Bostonian said as his eyes flicked a bright blue color.

Author's Note

Hey my fellow ponies! (and/or mercenaries) I want to thank you being there for me! I know this story had rough edges here and there (And I plan on fixing them soon), but it was worth it.
Sorry about the late end, I had to finish my semester (And I'm having to head on to another one) and study for the finals that happened a week or so ago.
If you have any questions, just ask me as usual down below (the comments)! If I somehow reach more than fifteen, I'm going to have to add a Q&A!

If you want, you can check out my story "Beyond Cosmos". It's in the same universe , as well as my other planned stories, as this story. Just a different timeline; I also plan on having most of my future stories fall after one another, like those "Tales of/from ___" series. Just to say, it should be sometime after the leaving of the mercenaries. The beginning need loads of work, especially near the end. I might need to fix up on that.

Love you guys, and peace out! (Muselk! Why did I have to get dominated by you?! I'm for sure I'll get you back! I will! And I'll be sure it'll be a glorious death!)