Death is all around me, the sheer amount is inconceivable. Death is coming for me, he is in the hearts of all I hold dear, and they come for me. My skin is perforated by the blades of my allies, the sting so immense that I am on the verge of blacking out. I am however kept alive to witness my demise, I can see my bleeding husk, and I am above my body. I am alive until my closest friend puts in the final strike, the life begins to leave my body and everything goes black. I am now in a place where nothing and everything exist, this is death's domain, a place of darkness; I am alone in death.
I woke up, drenched in sweat and gasping for air. The dream that has haunted me for 12 years still leaves me completely spooked and I do not wish for sleep to call my name again. I sit in my bed thankful that dreams do not reflect the real world but still unable to get the images out of my head, thus is the life of a paranoid near psychosis pony like me. Light is just now coating the land and the red glow has painted my room, I would have enjoyed a few extra hours of rest but I decided to get off my lazy ass and do something. I was then greeted by a face full of the floor. “Stupid sheets” I said as I untangled my hoof and threw them on the cot.
I trotted to the broken mirror at the other side of my room, the rotted wood creaking at every step. I looked into the mirror trying to find a good angle that didn’t have my face disfigured, I honestly looked like shit, but when did I not look like shit. I shrugged and swept a bit of my mane to the side so I didn’t look quite as unkempt. I started down the stairs and noticed the pungent smell of burning food; it seemed that mother had burnt the meat we had traded for last week, such a waste. When I got to the bottom of the stairs I saw that the stove was still on with no-one tending to it. No wonder the meat had been burnt, she wouldn’t have just left the stove unless something was urgent. I turned off the stove and began looking for any sign of emergency. There was nothing, not even the sound of children playing in the street. “Mother?! Father?! Anyone?!” Again nothing, nobody must have been in the house. I decided that the best course of action was to go into town and see what had everyone’s attention. I walked into the main room and felt a cold, sticky, puddle.
I looked down and saw the crimson, and then I slowly looked back up. Bile soon followed, the sight in front of me was grotesque and unholy. Limbs were scattered, intestines were hung, a torso had become a light cover, and the heads of my mother and father rest impaled on railway spikes. The entire room was covered in blood and had to have been conjured by all things evil. As I stood there trembling a dark figure walked behind me.
In the midst of a demented cackle he spoke “Look at this kid, its fucking hilarious Red, get over here. He’s frozen solid like he tried to have a staring contest with a cockatrice.”
The one who must have been Red came next, I turned to see the jagged carving knife in his mouth, and he hooked his hoof around my neck as he spoke. “So kid, do you like my masterpiece? It took four hours and was made harder ‘cuz the little bitch wouldn’t stop squirming, even after I cut her throat she still wouldn’t stop mouthing the name; Axel. It was hilarious, like a damn tragedy play directed by yours truly. Now it’s on to the finale, but first you need to understand something. I am called Red by ponies for a good reason, I paint the every town I find red with my beautiful plays. The stage is set, the show must go on, so let’s have a glorious climax wherein the kid tries to get revenge for his parents and dies a horrible death, joining the rest of his town; and sce-“
The tirade stopped as his head rolled in front of me, blade still in his mouth and a hole through his skull. I quickly grabbed the knife and turned on the accomplice, I jabbed his jugular and then perforated his chest, cracking his ribs. He pleaded for his life, clutching his neck until I put in the final blow, rupturing his heart. I left the blade in his chest cavity and turned to see a unicorn with a magnum floating in her telekinesis.
I just sat there and gawked, i couldn't comprehend the events that had transpired before me. My stupor didn't last long however as suddenly the mare bellowed out. "Come on you fucktard, do you wanna stay here in that puddle of blood and die, or are gonna get up and do something?"
I slowly stood up and trudged to the doorway, she had already turned and gone down the street. I turned my head to look in for reasons which escaped me. My body was numb as i looked upon the mess that was once my parents. I felt nothing, thought nothing, and said nothing; what could i say in the state i was in. Bellowing from around the corner i heard “Come on kid, there isn’t time to mourn, it’s a fucking war zone out here.” I needed to just suck it up so i could survive and mourn later.
I ran down the street to catch up with the foul mouthed mystery mare, she led me in the direction of the courtyard at the center of the town. As we walked i heard the cacophony of gunfire, almost as if it were playing its own tune. One shot would fire, followed by 5 more and a faint scream. Whether it be friend or foe, i had no idea.
A raider came from an alleyway at the mare in front of me, she used her telekinesis and deftly took the bucks combat knife from his side and put it through his eye, pistol dropping from his mouth as the rest of him formed a lifeless heap on the bloodsoaked streets. She wrapped the pistol in her magic and put it in her saddle bags. She was scary…
We soon came out into the courtyard and i was greeted by the site of a few others that had survived. As i surveyed the crowd i noticed one chilling thing, there were no parents, it looked as if there were only children...orphans…
My eyes soon caught the site of the a crimson mane, it was Rose! She had survived as well, one of the few people which i could actually call a friend. I made my way over to her happy that at least one person dear to me was still alive.
As i reached her i noticed the hollow expression on her face, she was in the same shape i was, possibly worse. She had always been the stronger of the two of us in the emotional department, always there when i had emotional issues like death of famil- son of bitch here comes tears. This was going to be a mess, and awkward beyond reason, i just knew it.
I sat down next to her and said the first thing that came to mind “sup”. Which sounded hoarse as hell due to the tears, i also wanted to slam my head through the closest wall for my stupidity. The response i got actually surprised me, in a voice of resignation she said “Nothing much, you?”
It was like nothing had happened, though i could tell she was just putting on a facade in order to mask the pain she was feeling; the exact same thing i was doing. Our eyes met and they only affirmed our feelings, we were broken, all we wanted to do was cry until we died but we were completely numb from the shock. We were just shells going about day to day activities to pass the time until we too died and faded into the ground.
I felt a rough, crusty, substance on my hoofs and realized that blood had caked my hoofs and dried. I walked across the courtyard and picked up a small bucket, then i filled it with water from a rainwater barrel next to the 2 Bits. I walked back to Rose and began washing my hoofs. After i had finished i looked up to see that her hoofs were caked with blood as well, i looked farther up and saw that her cream coat had black splotches of dried blood, her mane as well (though that was harder to see due to it blending in with her crimson mane). I began washing her hoofs, thinking that i probably should have grabbed a washcloth. When i finished with the hoofs i looked into her eyes, they were hollow, this blood was more than likely her father's. Her father was a strong buck, he was rumored to have hoof wrestled a hellhound and won. I uttered a chuckle and Rose finally spoke “What’s so funny to you Axel?”
I regained my composure and responded “Oh nothing, just the tall tales our parents would always tell us about themselves, complete bullshit but funny nonetheless”.
She chuckled as well but it was completely fake, there was no lightening the mood, when she was down she stayed down no matter what. There two ways of taking something, accepting it, and denying it, she was denying it and it was hurting a lot.
I surveyed the rest of the crowd and noticed a chilling trend, all that was left was children from grade school age to teenagers. Most of the young ones were trembling in their siblings hoofs, flinching at each shot fired in the orchestra of gunfire and screams. The orchestra finally stopped, one side had come out on top and it was time to see who. The children reluctantly stood up and the teenagers braced a hoof against them. I ran over to the only other entrance than the one i had come in at, i grabbed a nearby shovel and waited around the corner. From my right i heard voices, one female, two male. When i saw the first head come around the corner i swung, then felt my entire body fling backwards. “Get the fuck off me you loser, we cleared the town for you and this is the thanks we get from you fuckin’ pussies, thanks i really appreciate it.” It was the unicorn mare from earlier and damn did she hurt.
I started to stand up and she began barking orders towards the town. “Alright you shits, if you want to live line up outside the town, if not stay here. That wasn’t the first wave of raiders, hell no; there are more coming. They come like a school of piranhas when they smell blood and they sure as hell drew blood here so you are gonna need some big fuckin bandages or something bigger than a piranha.” A group of ponies began to head for the gates of the town, I wasn’t sure I would go but I could see Rose among the people so I went.
We stood outside in a line as they inspected us, I assumed they were seeing who was fit for battle. I was the last one in the line as I usually was, someone has to pull up the rear. The unicorn got to me and said “Well at least half of you are in peak shape, the others not so good but they’ll become fit if they want to survive. Here’s your reward!” Suddenly I felt a cold smack on my hooves, then I heard synchronized clicking. Fuck me running, I looked down dreading what I knew was down there. Hoof cuffs, what the fuck is wrong with this day!. I had to say something “What the fuck is wrong with you, y-you bitch! You save us only to do this to us, what was the point anyway we’re gonna die anyway now!”
She responded with a smile that you could see was forged from years of the craft “Easy kid, the young ones make a lot of money because they will grow up to know work, the teenage ones are the fittest. Don’t worry though the little ones will have school so its not all bad. But should be thanking us for your enslavement its a hell of a lot better than the raiders 3 course meal they planned for you. Kill and skull fuck your parents, leave the kids, come back and use them as personal cocksleaves till you’re all too loose, then they’ll eat your asses.”
That was that, with that every ounce of hope in the hearts of the survivors of our town died in flash of cold truth. This was in a better than the raider fate but not much, slavers were the worst kind of ponies. They still had their sanity but chose to abduct other ponies to do their work for them, they did it for many reasons some noble but it doesn’t change the fact that it is ponies they are transporting. Their kids wouldn’t be happy to find out that they ostensibly ended the lives of thousands in order to make ends meet and provide for them. Slavers are the bane of the ponies of the wastes.
Next thing I knew we were being loaded into a caged caravan, my mind went blank save for one word that permeated the abyss “survive”, well that and “fuck! a flea already!”
Footnote: Level Up
New Perk: Wild Wild Wasteland- You ready to see some shit that will make you question your purview of things such as your conundrums of philosophy?
What is purity? Is it the absence of fault, or the innocence of the soul? Could it be the virginity of mind and body? How exactly can one know what purity is when we have no examples of purity? Even the purest of water has imperfections, though we call it purified. We need these slight impurities in order to advance ourselves, thus purity is detrimental to us and is blasphemous to strive for. Why then do so many try to make themselves pure, this is something I truly will never understand. For one to remain a virgin means hindering their species, innocence is lost and unattainable moments after birth. Thus we strive for meaningless endeavors, hoping to find that there is salvation in doing so. The truth of the matter is, there is no salvation, there is only survival. Living day to day is all that we have and all we can ever hope for.
Now in the dying wasteland we are waking up to the reality that our façade of a glorious world is gone, and has left behind its true form. A dark desolate place in which the organisms that are fundamental to life struggle to survive. We live off of the scraps of the old world, a place of lies and deception hoping that we will live through the night and rebuild. However rebuilding would be pointless for the cycle would simply repeat, in the end the world is an endless cycle of death. The rising and falling of empires matters little to the rest of the universe and thus is insignificant, we are but fools killing each other in order to have a false sense of glory. There is nothing that we can do to stop death, even when we delay it, it will inevitably find us and take us, our mark meaning nothing in the end. Our endeavors are pointless. And all for what? a few years of glory? a few years of prosperity? In the end nothing matters, the blight that has taken over is nothing, this is but another chapter in our species timeline which dissipates as it is written.
In truth there is no reason to live, thus I search for it. Something to make me forget all which I have previously stated, something that will allow me to live knowing that I am an arrogant fool. This is the madness known as life, why not experience it to its fullest, we won’t make it out alive.
P.S.: These may sound like the musings of an insane person, however this is the thought process which comes to mind whenever a subject is brought to my attention, in the long run it leads to nothing. However it serves to express myself and my feelings so I will let it sink in.
Author's Note
This is a partial look into our protagonists mind as well as mine, this is the thought process i go through when i think about anything in life but i enjoy it, feeling content with this, Axel is in part based on myself.
