No, Miss Scratch, I expect you to Dine

Vinyl Scratch was not your average unicorn. Well, that kind of goes without saying, but that’s only if you know her well.

She was known, though, as the esteemed musician DJ-PON3, one of the most sought after DJs in Manehattan, but few actually knew her. If they did, they would be privy to the knowledge that, in the eyes of a certain government agency, DJing was a side job.

The Canterlot Intelligence Agency was probably one of the least known and respected agencies within the Equestrian government. A group that consisted mostly of techs and analyzers, the CIA was considered to be good only for knowing what kind of coffee a griffon dignitary was drinking and whether or not the Prench ambassador was wearing socks that evening. Anypony that had dreams of fieldwork usually transferred to the Night-Guard or Dawn-Patrol.

But not Vinyl Scratch. She saw an opportunity.

Making music was her passion, but her parents had demanded she get an actual job. So when her friend (and kinda sorta colt-friend) Neon Lights let slip that he was applying to the CIA, Vinyl took a chance and asked him about it.

Neon had a habit of going on long-winded monologues when the mood struck him and asking him a question held the chance that the mood would strike him. This instance was one of those times and while Vinyl had been bored half to death, she saw a loophole.

She and Neon applied together and, due to some bribery and a few favors, were trained as field agents. Now, the training of a field agent in the CIA was hardly different from the training of a Night-Guard, but a Night-Guard had a better chance of actually using their skills. But this was exactly what Vinyl was counting on.

Following her graduation from the training school, she put together a carefully worded paper and submitted it to her CO. The paper said that Vinyl had skills as a DJ and her skills could be best put to work in intelligence gathering. She could be implanted in a city and, using her skills, work parties where less than savory characters might show up. And since no pony ever pays mind to the hired help, she could potentially gleam little nuggets of information that could go a long way towards the betterment of society.

It took all of ten minutes for her CO to read the paper and call her out on her gambit, but the old mare with the Trottingham accent said she was impressed by the unicorn’s gall and the way she had executed her plan. A month later, Vinyl had been set up in Manehatten with a slush fund to pay for her equipment and her living expenses. Considering that Vinyl already possessed all the necessaries for her DJ-ing, she had little trouble finding an apartment that would suit her needs.

And so, from there it went; Vinyl built up her name and reputation in the city by playing anywhere she could. Within a year she was getting job offers at least once a week. And while it wasn’t often she overheard something she shouldn’t, Vinyl heard and passed along enough to keep her boss happy and a government paycheck in the mail every month.

Life was good for a time. But one day, Vinyl received a package along with her paycheck. Inside the package were a dress and a letter. The letter instructed Vinyl to squeeze herself into the dress by any means necessary and use the provided invitation to get herself into a party tomorrow evening. The party was to comprise of Manehattan’s elite, among them ponies with connections to Manehattan’s mafia syndicate.

She was to mingle and make small talk, seeing if she could gleam anything useful from any of the guests. But there was one pony she was warned about in particular: a hitter and high-level member of the mob that used her talent as a musician to go about unnoticed. The writer of the letter didn’t hesitate to point out the similarities to Vinyl. If possible, Vinyl was to get in this mare’s good graces.

The mare’s name was Octavia Philharmonica.

******************

Vinyl sighed as she stood inside the lavish high-rise apartment, listening to run-of-the-mill classical music playing on speakers hung in the upper corners of the room. The unicorn was way out of her element. A thin green dress covered in glitter clung to her body, the lack of a back ensuring that whenever somepony opened the door to the balcony she got a chill. She had a glass clutched in one hoof, half-filled with watered down champagne.

Vinyl looked around the room again, her magenta eyes roving over the gold and black decor with boredom. This place was so… bleh. It was gaudy and uninspired, decorated with the intention of showing off how rich and tasteless the owner was. And the music was terrible: a simple tune that didn’t go anywhere, like the musician fell asleep while playing.

Vinyl did appreciate older music - she had a fondness for string instruments - but she preferred it to be lively, or dramatic, or… anything but what was currently playing. Whoever was in charge of the play list should have snuck in something jazzier or maybe an orchestra piece of some sort. Just… something.

Of course, the reason Vinyl was so concerned with the music selection was that if it had been any good, she could've at least listened to it instead of the dull conversations the other attendees were having. The talk was either entirely pointless drivel or words so vague only a pony who knew exactly what the other meant would get it. So much for hearing interesting tidbits.

So, in short, Vinyl was chilly, thoroughly not entertained, bored, and above all, not drunk.

The unicorn sighed and meandered over to the punch bowl to refill her glass, if only so she would be doing something. She took her time, gripping the ladle and bringing it up. She was just about to tip the ladle’s opaque liquid contents into her glass when she noticed somepony had put lemon slices in the bowl.

Vinyl felt a faint smile on her lips as she opted to put the ladle back in the bowl and try to snag a lemon slice. That way, she could have an excuse for making a sour face.

Vinyl managed to busy herself for a minute or two, trying to find the best lemon slice and coax it into the ladle. She giggled softly, quickly checking to make sure no pony was watching her. Finally, Vinyl selected a lemon slice she wanted and brought it and a fair amount of the watered down champagne up in the ladle. She refilled her glass, taking care to ensure the lemon slice went in, and placed the ladle back in the bowl.

She made her way to a table not far away and sat down, placing her glass in front of her. She took a moment to stare at the glass of watered down champagne, wondering why anypony was at this party when the music was terrible and all the drinks did was give you a headache.

“This seat taken?” a voice suddenly asked, startling Vinyl from her musings.

She looked to the source of the voice and had to bite back a gasp. Before her stood a mare who seemed to have an air of refinement. Her grey coat went well with her long black mane, which cascaded down her back like an obsidian waterfall. Her violet eyes matched her silky purple dress, which had a slit on the side that went up far enough to show off her cutie mark, a purple musical note.

“Hello?” the mare said. “Are we all here, dear?”

“Huh?” Vinyl said dumbly before snapping back to reality again. “Oh, right, uh…” the unicorn tripped over her words, trying to compose herself. “Uh, the seat isn’t taken.”

The grey mare smiled. “Ah, thought not.” she laughed softly, the joke being that there wasn’t a single pony sitting at the table or any table nearby save Vinyl.

The mare pulled out a chair and sat down, sighing softly, apparently glad to be off her hooves. She smiled at Vinyl, who was becoming more and more nervous by the moment. This was Octavia, the mare her superiors had warned her about. According to the rather brief file they had sent over, Octavia was a ruthless killer, not shy about gunning down her enemies in broad daylight in the streets. And according to the file, she was also one of the best cello players in Equestria. She had even played the Grand Galloping Gala once, although she had refused the offer to play it again.

Octavia once again startled Vinyl from her thoughts with a question. “So, what brings you here?”

Vinyl blinked a few times before her brain managed to comprehend what Octavia had asked. “Here? Aw, you know, just… trying to rub a few elbows.”

“Is that so?” Octavia said, a faint smile on her lips. “And what do you do that makes you want to rub elbows here?”

“I’m a… musician.”

This seemed to pique the mare’s interest. “Really, what sort of music?”

Vinyl hesitated, but decided there was no harm in saying what her real passion was, so long as she left out the part about being a government agent.

“Electronic mostly. I work in clubs dropping beats and getting ponies dancing.”

Octavia’s face was near unreadable. “Hm, interesting…” she paused for a moment. “What’s your name, by the way? I might have heard your work.”

“Uh, well, my stage name is DJ-PON3, but my real name is Scratch. Vinyl Scratch.” Vinyl threw in what she hoped was a suave smile, trying to make a joke of her introduction.

It seemed to work, as Octavia giggled. “Well then miss Scratch, my name is Octavia Philharmonica.” she extended a hoof. “I’m not sure if you’ve heard of me.”

Octavia Philharmonica

Cello Player

Vinyl took the hoof and shook it. “Actually, I have heard of you. You played the Grand Galloping Gala once, right?”

Octavia took her hoof back and nodded. “That’s right, I did. Dreadfully boring affair all things told. I had to play a pre-selected piece that was just terribly bland. The only upside to the whole affair was what a disaster it turned into.”

Vinyl nodded. “Yeah, I heard it was really something to see.”

“More interesting than this place.” Octavia added, glancing irritably at a speaker. “If I had my cello with me, I’d show them some real music.”

Vinyl nodded. “Yeah, I heard one of your pieces on the radio once. Much better than this.” in truth, Vinyl had actually listened to a sample of the mare’s music on her record player in her apartment. It had been part of the package she’d been sent.

Octavia smiled. “You're too kind, but if I might say, quite correct.” she glanced at Vinyl’s glass. “Pardon me for asking, but do you actually enjoy drinking that stuff?”

“Honestly? No.”

Octavia glanced around like she was worried somepony was watching and then hiked her dress up a bit. Vinyl’s eyes nearly popped from their sockets before she noticed Octavia was just extracting a silver flask from a small belt she had hidden beneath her dress. The mare opened the flask and offered it to Vinyl.

“Have a sip if you’d like.”

Vinyl hesitantly took the flask and put it to her lips, allowing a small amount of the liquid inside to trickle into her mouth. She swallowed, the liquid burning her throat. Straight scotch.

“Thanks,” Vinyl said a bit hoarsely, handing Octavia back her flask.

“Anytime.” The grey mare took a swig from the flask before closing it and hiding it back in her dress.

There was a brief silence between the two, which was once more broken by Octavia and her questions.

“Do you want to get out of here? Go get something to eat or…” Octavia shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe we could go listen to some music. Or make our own if you feel like it. Anything but staying here.”

Vinyl took a moment to calm herself down. This was actually a lot easier than her superiors had made it out to be. Her target had just invited her to leave the party together. Now all she had to do was slowly work her way into Octavia’s life and see what she could find out.

“With you? Of course.” Vinyl said, happy things were going so swimmingly.

***********

Vinyl’s breath came to her in ragged gasps. She wrestled with Octavia, but the other mare was far stronger than one would think. Octavia succeeded in their little test of strength and threw Vinyl back against a wall, only to pounce on her in an instant.

Vinyl let out a drunken, breathy laugh as she felt Octavia kiss her neck, the earth pony mare’s hot breath and soft lips tickling her fur. Vinyl then let out a moan as Octavia’s hooves began roaming her body, seeking out its weak points.

Octavia was so engrossed in what she was doing with her hooves that it allowed Vinyl the opportunity to shove the other mare off of herself. Vinyl followed this up by quickly shimmying herself out of her dress and kicking the pile of fabric aside. Octavia, panting, responded in kind, pulling off her own dress and kicking it aside.

The mare stood at the edge of the bed, daring Vinyl to come closer with a few raises of her eyebrows. The unicorn grinned and ran forward, intent on tackling Octavia onto the bed. The other mare had other plans, however, and pivoted her body as Vinyl reached her, grabbing the unicorn and using her momentum to throw her onto the bed.

Octavia was on Vinyl once more, kissing and nipping. The unicorn soon grabbed hold on the mare’s head and pulled her into a deep, tongue-probing kiss.

They broke apart and Octavia let out a laugh. She kissed Vinyl softly on the lips again before she began trailing more kisses down the unicorn’s body…

************

Vinyl groaned as consciousness returned to her. The sunlight steaming in from the balcony was like white-hot pain to her eyes, which in turn seemed to make the pounding in her head worse.

She rolled over so the sun wasn’t shining on her and groggily opened her eyes. She nearly bit her tongue when she saw what was a scant few inches form her face.

Octavia laid beside her, the earth pony sound asleep, her black mane a tangled mess. Vinyl dared not breathe too loudly as she slowly pushed herself up into a sitting position and took stock of herself and the room.

The large bed in which she and Octavia lay was disheveled: blankets mussed and tangled, pillows thrown about, most on the floor. Joining the pillows on the floor was Vinyl’s dress, crumpled and forgotten. Also among the items on the floor were a few bottles, some still half filled with their intoxicating liquids, surrounded by a few stains. The thing that made Vinyl cringe a little was the big rubber dildo that had landed inside a pie. A blueberry pie.

It came back to Vinyl a little now. She and Octavia had gone to a little diner and gotten plenty of food to go, stopping off at a liquor store on the way to Octavia’s hotel. When they had gotten inside, they had eaten the food and drank a fair amount of the alcohol until they spontaneously began kissing. Vinyl wasn’t sure who started it, but judging by the aching of her body, the taste that lingered on her tongue, and the dildo in the pie, she had a good idea of where it had led.

Vinyl tried to get her breathing under control, trying not to imagine how fucked she was, having slept with the very mare that she had been sent to spy on.

The only upside was that Vinyl knew from college that she was bisexual, so she had no need to panic about betraying her sexuality.

She did however; need to panic about explaining this to Neon.

And, just as Vinyl managed to regain control of her breathing, a loud sound startled her so much she physically leapt into the air.

Of Techno and Thompsons

Author's Note

My take on the classic OctaScratch fic.

I had this idea for a while and just needed to get it down before someone else did.