The ID

by KaBar42

Rating: mature
Tags: Main 6, Princess Luna, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Comedy, Adventure, Queen Chrysalis, Princess Celestia, Alternate Universe, Human
Length: 1126

A twenty year old with odd powers is in Equestria.

I am Dante, The Vice of Adaption, selfishness, and chaos. Discord is the God of chaos, but my species apparently represent chaos.

Imprisoned for two thousand years in stone, a recent... incident released me.

Freedom has never been so awesome!

Published 2014-02-24 10:30:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-03-22 09:18:50 UTC

Freedom!

The ID.
Chapter 1

I looked longingly at my neck, well, atleast as well as one could when they’re stone. It saddened me, to have my constant companion taken from me. The source of my power, my ID.

Oh, where are my manners. My name is Dante. That’s my only name, I dropped the rest of it a few years after I came here. That was about two thousand years ago. Why was I sealed in stone? I had some freaky ass forbidden power and freaked out the ponies. Yeah, you heard me right, ponies. Apparently this world is dominated by ponies. Multi-colored three foot talking ones.

Also being a biped alien is apparently illegal over here. That was one of the charges those motherfuckers read to me. After being turned into stone. Oh, well.

I wonder where Discord is, it’s been awhile since I talked to him.

“Miss Cheerilee, what’s that?”

Oh, brilliant. Another tour group. At least they’re not pigeons. Stupid motherfuckers.

“That, Applebloom, is the vice of adaption, selfishness, and chaos.”

Bullshit, those motherfuckers wouldn’t know a vice even if it smacked them in the face. This position was really beginning to annoy me. I couldn’t see a damn thing! My left arm was bent in a U shape, with my right arm raised vertically.

Besides the fact that I wasn’t even the “vice” of chaos. Their definition is weird. Discord is the official god of Chaos, whereas I was just given his abilities, for some odd reason.

I could hear an argument breaking out between a few of them. Then one of those fuckers graced me with this line.

“Why is he so ugly? I mean the plaque said he always walked upright, he’d be so weak!”

You motherfucker, I’ll have you know I defeated the entire guard without permanently injuring one of them. It wasn’t until Solaira and that other guy, her husband I think, pulled out those fucking elements of Harmony.

The sounds of hoofsteps fading sounded. Oh, well. It’ll be a little while before the next tour gro-

*crack*

Wait a minute, what the fuck? Is that what I think it is?

My stone prison shattered, and I fell to the ground.

I’m back, motherfuckers!

(-)

I didn’t have my normal power I normally had, but I had enough to conjure my mask. What mask? Why, the PayDay2 Wolf mask, of course. It always scared those fuckers.

I slipped it on. Now, time to find my ID. I started walking out of the gardens. I knew where it was, stored with the EoHs. Meh, no big problem.

I got to the entrance I was looking for. Two guards were at watch. A unicorn and a pegasus. I could deal with them.

I continued strolling up to the door. The ponies saw me, and the unicorn raised his spear in his telekinesis.

“Halt creature!” It yelled.

Nope.

“I will use lethal force!” He continued.

Like I’m afraid.

“Shimmer, that’s the vice of adaption! Don’t attack him!” The pegasus tried to warn his unicorn buddy, whom I assumed was a mare. The unicorn didn’t listen, however, and threw the spear.

I raised my right arm, and the spear stopped in mid-air.

“My name, my dear ponies, is Dante.” With that, I closed my palm destroying the very matter it was made of. I’m not completely bound by the laws of physics.

I took the mare, Shimmer into my TK grip and slammed her against the wall. I don’t kill things that aren’t threats. That’s not my MO. The pegasus guard, smartly backed off. I slammed open the large entrance doors and continued on. So long as it was only guards, I’d be fine. But if it was Celestia or Luna, or even Celly’s prized student, I was fucked. I continued in the long hall, finally reaching the area where I could feel my ID. Turns out my initial assumption of it being stored with the Elements was wrong. Damn, I wanted to kill two birds with one stone. Oh well.

There, in the large room that had quite a few tapestries hanging up, was a door. They put a magical seal on it, how cute.

I walked up to it, and touched it. Focusing all of my magic onto the door, I essentially short circuited the seal. Now it was nothing but a door.

Raising my foot, I pushed forward and caused the door to crack in half. I’ve always wanted to kick a door. There, in the middle of the room, was my ID. A source of extreme magical power.

I walked to it. I had missed it so much. I slipped the lanyard that read “DANTE” In block white letters onto my neck. My dad’s old lanyard from Trinity High School. Also where he got my name. Wonder how he’s doing now.

I walked out of the room and headed back down the hall, I knew this area. The main doors weren’t too far from here. I walked down the hall, taking out contingents of guards when needed. No one died. I did come to a roadblock when I reached the main hall, however.
The roadblock was ten contingents of guards, six civilian ponies, and two alicorns.

“Well, will you look at that! Witta Woona and Tiny Tia are all grown up!” I yelled, as I descended the stairs, conjuring a top hat and tipping it. The two alicorns blushed at the nicknames, but quickly recovered.

“Dante, why are you here?” Celly asked, I reciprocated. I made the top hat disappear.

“Thank a couple of fillies. How about this. Neither of us want to fight, so we go our sep-,” I began but was a interrupted by a cyan mare.
She flew about midway between Celly and I yelled. “We’ll take you any day, freak!”

“Do not interrupt me when I am speaking.” I snapped my fingers, causing her mouth and both her wings to disappear. She crashed to the ground. She quickly recovered and was feeling for her wings, clearly panicked. It would wear off in a couple of hours.

“Well than,” I began, conjuring another top hat, cape, and cane. “I would love to stay and chat, but freedom awaits me. So, I bid you adieu.” I bowed, holding the cane out the side as well as the top hat.

I than proceeded to teleport.

(-)

I looked at the dilapidated structure and smiled.

“Hello, old friend.

Author's Note

Yeah, so testing how I write god-like characters. This will probably continue.

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