The Worst Possible Apocalypse

by CodaColt

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Random
Length: 2683

Before the horrible curse of the Squeeze Fleas can take over Spike's mind and turn him into an affectionate drone, he takes one last look back at the week leading up to this disaster.

Spike – being of sound-ish mind, reflects on the previous week wherein the relatively harmless Hug Bugs were accidentally genetically altered by Twilight, and transformed into something far more sinister, something that has no regard for personal space.

(Somewhat inspired by "Huggled" by RedSquirel456)

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-02-26 21:50:03 UTC

The Hug Bugs (Sunday)

Spike ran as fast as he possibly could -- the horde of ponies chasing after him.  He knew that if he slowed down just a little, they would catch him, and then- he didn't want to think about it.  Nay, he couldn't think about it!  He was running too fast, and his focus was entirely on getting to the library.

"Spike! Spike! Come here!" and other similar statements were flung at him from the mob.  Spike recognized some of the voices and very nearly turned to look, but no, they weren't his friends anymore, they were just monsters.

As he made his way ever closer to the library, other zombies (for lack of a better term) who weren't in the mob were prowling the streets, looking for uninfected to attack.  Spike had to dodge some of their lunges and choked back tears as he noticed them attacking other ponies who hadn't found safety.  Their screams in terror only made him run faster, and he could finally see the large tree as he turned another corner.

"Almost there," he thought as it got closer, and closer...

The door made a bang as he forced it open and he quickly tried to close it.  In the mob, a few of the fastest ponies had been far ahead of the others, and one of them managed to get her hoof stuck in the door, so he couldn't get it closed -- try as he might.  "Come on, Spike, open up!" she practically begged, and by the sound of her voice, and the color of her hoof, it must have been Rainbow Dash.

"No!  Get," Spike grunted, "back!"  With a final push, Rainbow Dash screamed in pain, and pulled her hoof out of the door.  The door finally closed, and Spike wasted no time in locking it fully.  "Twilight!  Are you in here?"  He called -- moving to check all of the windows.  Twilight did not respond however, and the only sound Spike heard as he locked the windows was the sound of the mob trying to break down the door.  The door was strong, but it wouldn't last forever.  He needed to find Twilight, she would know what to do!

Spike ran to the lab where Twilight had been working on a cure, and called out for her again.  "Twilight, are you here?"  After a quick glance at her work table, he ran back out in to the main room of the library.  He called out again, but was only answered by loud slamming coming from the front door, and the voices from the mob.  "Let us in, Spike!", "Why are you afraid of us?", and other comments almost made him pity them.  If he didn't know any better, he would have thought that they meant no harm.

Spike quickly made his way throughout the building -- checking rooms along the way -- until he came to his and Twilight's room.  "Twilight, you in here?" he asked.  He closed the door behind him, locked it, and began to move a bookcase in front to prevent any intruders from entering.  Before he could finish, however, he heard a voice from the hall outside the door.  It called his name.

Spike instantly recognized the voice, and quickly unlocked the door.  "Twilight," he said, relief rushing through him, "Where were you?  Why didn't you answer me?"  He opened the door and saw a silhouette  at the other end of the hall, concealed in shadow, and slowly trotting closer to the room.

"Spike, come here," was all she said, and her voice had something, wrong about it.  Spike took a few steps towards his friend and adoptive sister, but then stopped as her words sunk in.  Spike couldn't put his claw on it, but warning signals were going off in his head.  He knew Twilight, and something seemed wrong with the way she said that.

"Uh, Twilight, are you okay?"  She was about a third of the way to the room now, and her facial features were getting clearer as she stepped into the light.

"Spike, I am fine.  Come here."  Twilight's pace quickened to a small canter.

Spike began to be afraid.  Was Twilight infec-  Suddenly, she sped into a gallop, and her face could be seen in the light from the open door.  The last time Spike saw her face look like that was that time she had almost missed her deadline sending Princess Celestia a letter.  But this time, she looked worse.  The feathers on her wings were ruffled, her eyes were bloodshot, and her smile was wide.  "Come here Spike!"  she yelled at him in an almost sadistic tone, paralyzing him in fear.  How could this happen to Twilight, how could- his thought was interrupted when she finally closed the distance between them.

"Noooooooo!"  Spike screamed, but his protests were for naught.  Twilight lunged, and knocked him to the ground, and then the worst possible thing happened: she hugged him.  Spike was terrified out of his mind now, and he struggled in vain to release himself from Twilight's crazed embrace.  Despite Spike's discomfort, Twilight's expression seemed to relax as she hugged him -- as if her stress was gone.  Spike -- desperate for an escape -- was forced to bite Twilight's snout, and she released him from the pain.  Spike knew that wouldn't stop her for long, and so he pushed away the affectionate alicorn and fled to the open door.

"Spike, no!"  she cried as she got back up.  Spike had already managed to limp back into the room, though, and by the time she lunged at him again, the door was closed, and he was pushing the bookcase in front of it to stop her.  "Spike, open up!  I'm not gonna hurt you!  I just want a hug!"  Her voice was filled with desperation as she banged on the door.

Spike collapsed at the far end of the room.  He looked up, exhausted, to find the window was opened.  He painfully got up to close it, and was disheartened by the sight he saw: ponies everywhere, hugging each other.  It was the most horrifying thing he could have imagined.  He looked down and witnessed the defeat of a brave, brown stallion as he was swarmed by a group of the fiends.  Spike could see his struggling against their hugs until he resisted no more.  Noticing that their victim was defeated, his attackers released him in favor of a green mare.  The stallion shook himself off before donning that all-too-familiar smile and joining his ex-enemies.  Spike could just make out the words that he said:  "Come here, Lyra!"

Spike slammed the window shut and collapsed to the ground.  He was hugged.  Twilight herself was the one to infect him, and now he would turn into one of those affectionate monsters.  "M-maybe I can fight it?"  Spike thought about it, and a flicker of hope came to mind.  That metaphorical flicker however, was metaphorically blown out once Spike remembered Twilight's own words mere hours earlier.   "The parasite is incredibly powerful, Spike.  It will not stop attacking the brain of the hugged until it has control.  I doubt anypony has enough willpower to defeat it."

Spike felt horrible.  He was going to turn sooner or later, and there was nothing he could do to stop it.  It didn't even matter that he managed to escape Twilight, all that meant was that he would turn a little more slowly.  Maybe he should have let her keep hugging him so that it would end quicker.  Spike shuddered at the thought of being hugged again.  No, he would wait in here until it happened.  To go out there would be a fate worse than death.

It was almost unbelievable that all of this had happened in less than a week.  It was sunset on Wednesday now, and it was sure to be Spike's last.  Just as ponies lives flash before their eyes, Spike's week flashed before his eyes.

"Spike, wake up already!"  Twilight Sparkle shook Spike awake on that fateful morning.  Normally she would let him sleep in on a Sunday, but, as she reminded him constantly, today was important.  The constant reminders didn't seem all too important though, and so Spike made very little effort to go to bed early the previous night.  And now, he was to suffer for it.

"Oh, come on, just five more minutes -- or hours, maybe."  Spike attempted to pull his blanket over his face, but Twilight had already used her magic to levitate it out of reach.

"No, Spike!  You've got to be awake and ready for my correspondence with the institute!"  Twilight, despite becoming an alicorn princess, really didn't change much -- at least in the personality department.  She was clearly anxious and excited..

Spike sat up in his little bed and rubbed the sleep from his eyes.  "Why does it have to be today, anyway?"  he asked, clearly grumpy from his awakening.

Twilight groaned in frustration and facehooved.  "Why do I even bother reminding you?" she asked rhetorically.  "Like I said about seven-million times before, today is the day when they finally send me their answer on my application to study Hug Bugs!  If I can develop a non-lethal pesticide for them, scientific progress will be furthered!"  Twilight's excitement seemed to grow with each word she said.

Surprisingly, Spike remembered at least parts of Twilight's lecture on Hug Bugs.  They were apparently a rare kind of parasprite that used to grow exclusively in Saddle Arabia until some dumb-witted camel brought them back into Equestria.  Ever since then, their population has steadily risen.  Apparently, they fed on affection -- not unlike Changelings -- and would sneak into the fur of unsuspecting victims during hugs (hence their name).  Being infected by them made a pony depressed and in need of a hug, and so they spread.  They weren't a big enough problem to be called an epidemic, but Twilight wasn't going to wait for them to become one.  She had sent a letter to the Equestrian Institution of Biological Studies asking for specimens for her to work on.  She cited her authority as Princess Celestia's Ex-student, and newest princess in her application.  It was today that they would answer her.

"Why do I have to be awake for this, again?"  Spike asked with a yawn.  Twilight let out an exaggerated sigh and another facehoof.  Before she could give him the obvious answer however, Spike felt the familiar unpleasant sensation of an upcoming belch.  He covered his mouth in a vain attempt to keep it in, but he couldn't stop the burp.  Green fire shot out of his mouth along with a rolled up piece of parchment.  Twilight practically squeed in excitement as she grabbed for the roll before it even touched the ground.  She was so excited that she read it aloud:

Dear Princess Twilight Sparkle, your request for specimens of the species Paraspritis Complectus has been examined and approved in accordance with the guidelines listed in your letter.  At your earliest convenience please report to the Ponyville Post Office for delivery.  You are aware of the risks involved, and are expected to exercise the proper precautions with them.  Have a nice day.  

Sincerely, U. Kary Ote, Secretary of the president of the Equestrian Institution of Biological Studies.

Twilight let out another squee before rolling the paper up again and placing it on her bed,  Spike took that as his cue to go back to bed before he felt the familiar sensation yet again, and burped out another piece of parchment.  Twilight took the piece of parchment, looked it over once or twice, and then placed it on the bed next to the other roll.

"What was that all about?"  Spike asked, surprised that she didn't read this one aloud as well.

"Oh, it's just legal stuff; animal rights, my deadline for experimenting, you know."  Twilight was about to leave the room before she stopped and turned around.  "Are you coming or not, Spike?"

"Why do I need to come with you?"  Spike whined.

"I'm going to need some help getting the Hug Bugs from the postal office to the lab.  Didn't I tell you that yesterday?"

Spike thought for a moment.  "No?"  he asked, unsure.  Twilight sighed again, gave a final facehoof, and levitated the little dragon onto her back.  "Come on, Spike.  Maybe i'll get you a jewel afterwards."

Spike begrudgingly accepted her terms and didn't make any other effort to resist.

⁂

"Here they are, Your Highness; they just arrived a few minutes ago."  The light blue Pegasus mailmare at the post office pointed the two to a couple of sealed metal boxes behind the counter.

"Please, just call me Twilight."  Ever since her coronation, all of the ponies of Ponyville kept calling her Princess, or Your Highness.  Twilight always felt flustered when this happened; she just wanted to be treated like anypony else.

"Sorry about that, Your Highness," the mailmare said, oblivious to the discomfort it caused Twilight.  Spike held back a laugh while they moved back behind the counter.  One of the boxes was huge, and was about thrice the size of Spike.  The other was only half the size of Spike.  The bigger box had chain-links on the top of it -- no doubt to allow air inside, but the smaller box had no such chains.  Upon both boxes were pieces of paper with the address of Twilight written on them.

"Okay, Spike.  Grab that smaller box."  Spike hopped off of Twilight's back and walked over to the smaller box.  He expected it to be heavy, but it was relatively light.  Twilight activated her magic, and lifted the larger box into the air -- her purple aura enveloping it.  Her face looked strained.

"Okay, miss, could you please open the door for us?"  Twilight asked, clearly uncomfortable with her heavy load.  The

Pegasus seemingly snapped back to reality and gave a salute.

"Yes, Your Majesty."  She flew over to the window and opened it before standing at attention to its side.

"Um, thank you, but we need to use the door, not the window," Twilight said.

"Oh, yes, of course.  Forgive me, Your Majesty; my eyesight isn't the best."  She stumbled over to the door and opened it.

Spike, since his claws were full, couldn't hold back his laughter.  He quickly paid for this when he let go of the box to cover his mouth.  "Ow!" he cried.  The box wasn't as heavy as he thought it would be, but it sure didn't tickle when it fell on his foot.  Spike quickly feigned recovery, and picked the box back up.

"Be careful, Spike, some of the things in there are fragile."  Twilight turned to the saluting Pegasus.

"Well, thank you, miss.  We'll be going now."  Being a princess had its perks.  She didn't even need to sign paperwork because she was already recognizable to all.  Then again, it may have been because the mailmare forgot to get the paperwork.  Honestly, both were valid possibilities.

On the way back to the library, Spike had to walk in front of Twilight to let her know of any obstructions.  Among the collisions he prevented was a rock, a pothole, and a group of crusading fillies who were attempting to get their obstacle cutie marks.  ("What would an obstacle Cutie Mark even look like?")

Once they made it back to the library, Spike placed the box down and opened the doors for Twilight to get in.  "Sorry if I couldn't use the window, Your Highness," he giggled.

"Oh, stop it.  She tries, and that's all that matters."  Twilight trotted inside and Spike picked up his box before following her.

"Well excuuuuuuuse me, princess."  The two made their way into Twilight's laboratory and she directed him to place the box on a table while she placed hers in a corner.

"Thank you, Spike.  Come back for lunch and I'll get you some gemstones."  Twilight used her magic to open the smaller box and levitated several small instruments out of it before placing them on the table.

"What are those?" Spike asked.

"These are different tools that my lab was lacking.  I ordered them right after I applied for the Hug Bugs so that I could use them for studying them."  She levitated a small bowl of leaves from the opposite side of the room and placed it next to her other tools.  She moved the metal box to beneath the table and got to work preparing for her study.

"What exactly are you going to do to study those things?" he asked, curious for once.

Twilight was occupied with her preparations, but she answered the dragon absentmindedly, "Oh, I'll see what they eat, how they react to various stimuli, examine their cells beneath a microscope, try to determine what repels them, you know, stuff like that."

Spike looked at the corner of the room where the larger box lay.  He wasn't sure, but he thought he saw it move...