Whether We Like It or Not

I yawned as I stretched my arms over my head in exhaustion, only having recently woken up.

Looking around though, I found myself pleasantly surprised by a small change in schedule. Something that, evidently, was so out of place to me that I just no choice but to remember it. The food trays were already inside of the room. And one of them had already been voided of their contents.

"Seems that you finally woke up." I looked to my right and noticed Chrysalis, as awake and aware as ever, looking to me with a bored expression.

I had, apparently, overslept. Whatever that meant in the current circumstances. It was great! Such a wonderful distraction, and so rare too! An absolute joy of a day that could be celebrated from that day on! Just fan-fucking-tast-

*OW*!

The hell? Where'd you get that newspaper???

Alright, I'll ease up on the sarcasm, sheesh.

"It would seem that thou hadst a peaceful slumber." Nightmare Moon was the next to comment.

I nodded in response, surprisingly managing to keep from being surprised by her sudden intrusion into my head as I stood up and made my way to my metal serving tray that did not look like a grenade had exploded inside of it.

Beyond those differences, it's still dark, I'm still stuck in this room, and I still don't remember why.

By all means, it was the same old, same old. Just a different coat of paint.

"Now then, if you would simply try to inform the guards of their negligence. I believe they have forgotten to pass me my usual serving."

I figured that Chrysalis was talking about the fact that she only had one serving's worth of 'food' as opposed to the prior day's.

I watched as a portion of goop slid through my provided utensil like starch and soup, deciding to distract myself from the biological crime I was about to commit in the only way I knew how.

"Alright, but first, I got a riddle for you. What's my name?"

By all means, I could have sworn it was going to be another day like the others.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Princess? Is everything all right? You seem stressed." A fellow guard asked his monarch.

True to his words, Princess Celestia seemed absolutely a mess, magically rummaging through several layers of paperwork, signing over several papers while reading through several more. Bags were clearly visible under her eyes, several cups of tea or coffee were strewn around her, and her mane seemed to struggle to maintain its usual flow of elegance.

Things has gotten busy since the winter had begun and Celestia could only handle so much of it. Of course, it also didn't help that Discord was roaming around the castle after being 'reeducated' to control his chaotic habits. Truthfully, Celestia had thought this to be nonsense. Nonetheless, she allowed it, if only to please the friends of her prized student.

"I am fine." Celestia lied, momentarily looking away from her paperwork and giving her guard a kind smile.

"I have simply... had a lot on my plate. Nonetheless, I have been through much worse."

The guard gave a slight look of concern nonetheless.

"If you wish, you highness, I could send for somepony to assist you?"

Celestia simply shook her head and chuckled at this. She had done these reports on her own for decades, centuries even. Were things a bit difficult at the moment? Yes. But she didn't keep Equestria in the state of peace it was in by simply asking for help at the slightest of inconveniences. She was perfectly independent and capable, all obtained through years of hard work and effort. She could do this on her own.

She had for a long time.

Nonetheless, a thought of worry shot through her mind.

"Then again, I didn't have to deal with a roving Discord back then."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"What to do, what to do?" The chaotic incarnate mused to himself as he floated backwards through the halls of the castle, paintings tilting by just a few degrees as he passed by them. He had been in this castle for over a month now: a month without any major acts of chaos to occupy him.

To him, it was like torture. He was absolutely itching to do something. Anything, really, but if the princesses noticed, he would have a lot of explaining to do... and he'd probably be turned to stone. Standing in one place and staring at the same thing for years on end, not fun. Also, birds tended to target him as a restroom he noticed.

Sure, he had turned some of them from deadly, powerful, and almost unstoppable beings of pure scaley destruction into chickens some million or so years ago, but surely making it so that he needed to be cleaned every other week was a bit much?

" I was told not to purposely cause any chaos..." He hummed and hawed, speaking to nobody in particular as a mischievous grin formed.

"... Which means I wasn't disallowed from accidental chaos!" He tittered to himself at the idea. A delightfully devilish, yet technically correct, idea. The best kind of correct!

Covering his eyes with one of his mismatched appendages, a small pepper shaker 'poofed' up out of nowhere. He giggled before 'unintentionally' tilting and spilling a small amount over his nose.

For a moment he inhaled sharply, the usual symptoms of a sneeze beginning to show. Then, right at the precipice, just as he was about to exhale and let out that little bit of biological chaos that every living being has, he burped.

"Woops! Shouldn't have had that glass and wire burrito earlier." He commented, patting his belly as a small breeze of magic is blown down the halls of the castle from his gaseous exhalation, looking for something to interact with.

"That should hold me up for a bit. Though I do wonder what it will do... Ah, where's the fun in it if I spoil the surprise."

Unbeknownst to Celestia, her sister Luna, or even Discord, the less than pleasant breeze had already selected a target with which to interact with. Flowing through the many halls of the castle, guards shivered as they felt an odd cold pass by them. Yet, they still held their positions like stones.

Soon, the breeze began to travel downwards, sounds of its fellow stray winds passing along it. It crisscrossed through the labyrinthine depths of the castle, occasionally blowing dust around with it through its journey. Reaching its destination after what had seemed like an endless search, the wind picked up in strength. It blew out torches as it readied itself for its last moment of freedom. One last push towards the end as, finally, it slammed harmlessly into nearby door. All the magic and energy it had held within itself was lost in less than a fraction of a seconf. It's journey was done.

The journey of the three behind the steel door it had collided with though?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Am not."

"Are too."

We had reached the arguing part of our day yet again.

Nightmare Moon was likely sitting by and watching as Chrysalis began to stand again and I made my way to the steel door. As to what we were arguing about, it was whether or not I was a 'blubbering fool'. I really hoped that Nightmare Moon wouldn't have me shut up this time around. I was on a bit of a roll with that 'self-centered ladybug' comment and I really didn't want to lose it.

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am no- Whoa!" And then that moment came.

Panic. Pure, unadulterated panic. Not the kind that comes from an actual life threatening situation, or anything like that. Rather, its the type of panic that comes from leaning just a bit too far backwards on a chair and almost falling over. Yeah, that seems about right for what I felt right about then.

I flailed my arms as I fell for what seemed like hours. Okay, no, that's pretty overdramatic.

I just fell over and hit the floor with a thud, the wind being knocked out of me like a punch to the stomach.

I groaned, rolled over, and picked myself up. There was more than a little embarrassment in the back of my mind over the fact that I had apparently slid against the steel door and fell over. But, hey, I had a stupid argument to win! Priorities!

"This proves nothing, Chry-" And that was as far as I got before whatever I had wanted to say died in my throat.

There was something distinctively different about where I was. No longer was I in a dark little room with barely enough space to run back and forth for all of a second or two. Instead, I was in some kind of stone hallway, lit by far off scattered torches that hung from the walls. A few of the closer ones were darkened, some even having small hints of smoke coming from them as though they had only recently been snuffed out.

I remember just staring as the little wisps of smoke blended in with the dim hall, not really able to process anything that had been happening. I probably would have stayed there longer if it were for the sudden sounds of metallic thuds echoing through the hall from right next to me.

There was a door there. A big one. One that was concerningly and vividly familiar. It was the same door that I had become superbly familiar with over the past few months. Only, now, I was looking at it from an entirely new perspective.

From outside.

I dunno if I was smiling or not. I think I was. I certainly remember giving out a laugh as a medley of different thoughts shot through my head.

Thoughts of finally figuring out what was going on. Thoughts of going home and sleeping in my own bed. Thoughts of asking who the hell had thought it to be a good idea to lock me away for so long without so much as an explanation why.

But, again, there was the sound of something hitting the metal door next to me. Harder than prior. More desperate. With more... finality, I guess.

... The thoughts turned to the two behind the door. To the months I had spoken and interacted with them.

I just... couldn't move on. So, I did the first thing that came to mind.

I looked every inch of that door, touching every portion of it that I could while trying to see if I could maybe--just maybe--repeat whatever had happened before. All I came up with was a pair of keyholes; One for the door and the other for the slide they pushed our food through.

I had more than a few questions about why that that small opening needed a lock but could wait for later.

I let out silent sounds of strains as I tried to stuff my fingers into the lock like some kind of invalid, hanging onto this random, nonsensical idea that I might just be able to fiddle with it if I used, I don't know, my fingernails or something? I wasn't in my right mind, obviously. Everything had happened so fast, so out of left field, so out of... whatever else it may have been. I just wasn't able to form a proper thought.

To my credit though, I wouldn't say that there wasn't a time limit, of sorts.

"Ugh. I hate working the night shift." I froze as I heard the deep sounding voice of a guard resound through the hall.

That time limit I mentioned? It had evidently decided to speed up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Ugh. I hate working the night shift." The royal guard complained, having recently been pawned off the prisoner watch for the night by his acquaintance. Sure, he owed him, what with him being the reason he was able to find such a cheap place in Canterlot to bunk, but this was hardly the most entertaining duty that they had on the roster.

After all, the prisoners couldn't escape from their chamber if they had tried. Two of them were too weak to use their magical energy and the other couldn't use magic at all, judging from the reports.

Letting out a sigh, the guard turned the corner to the innermost dungeons where the steel doored chamber lay. To his surprise though, he couldn't really see the chamber. Not that it wasn't there, its just that the torches in the hall that all lead to the room, for some reason, were dimmed.

"Oh, for Celestia's sake..." He grumbled, making his way down the darkened hall as he resigned himself to adding replacing torches to his nightly duties.

Being a Unicorn, the lack of light was hardly much of an issue. He brought about a faint glow in his horn as he thought of an unspecific spell. Sure, there was a proper light spell, of sorts, but he was far too annoyed by the situation to put even that little effort more forward in order to resolve the situation.

Each of his steps echoed in the hall, almost taunting him as he soon approached the steel doors of the prison chamber. As he glanced to one of the nearby torches, he couldn't help but notice that they didn't really seem as though they had burnt out. There was still ample cloth, and by no means should the enchantment placed on them have allowed them to just die out quickly or without reason. By all means, they should have had another few hours of light.

His ear flicked ever so slightly as he heard the sound of wood giving out a slightly audible creak. He assumed that it was one of the torches settling into place in their respective sconces, turning more out of instinct than anything else. Much to his surprise though, he wasn't met by empty hallway and crackling torchlight. Rather, the figure of a rather distinctive individual, the sconce of a torch that he had managed to quietly remove in his hands.

There was a moment of silence between the two beings, each one another a cursory glance as they slowly but surely realized the situation they were in.

The now former prisoner's mind, evidently, was more willing to let his actions function before his thoughts.

He sprinted towards the guard, stumbling as his hold on the sconce tightened and he reeled it behind him. The pony, in a state of shock, was barely able to do little more than use the magic he had already held in his horn for another simple spell. For the pony, everything went black, but not before he could let out a single magically transmitted message.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It uh... was by no means a well thought out plan. Hell, I'm amazed I came up with even that, considering the circumstances. Thankfully, I hadn't killed him. I checked and, yes, he was still very much bleeding. Probably had a concussion, and would be dealing with the absolute worst headache of his life when he came to, but he was alive.

Also, in hindsight, he was a unicorn. Couldn't he have just... lit all the torches from far away?

God, neither of us were ready for that night, were we?

I couldn't help but sharply breathe in through my teeth as I noted the already growing bruise on the unicorn's head, mumbling a silent apology to the guard as I looked him over for his keys.

Fortunately for me, they weren't hard to find. Unfortunately for the guard, he had landed on them. Ouch.

I flipped him over carefully and grabbed the keyring stabbing into where his cutie mark and rear leg met. Three keys hung off of it.

No less than a second after I had gotten them had I begun to look through the three keys, testing each of them out on the door. I'll give you a wild guess as to which one ended up being the right one. Here's a hint, the last one I tried.

Pretty much the moment I turned the key, the door practically came to life. Several steel mechanisms grinded and shook, likely working through magic as it unlocked the previously impenetrable door. Before long, the door even went so far as to open on itself.

At least, all of three or four centimeters. The rest, evidently, was manual, which was just lovely.

If I hadn't realized just how out of shape I was before, I certainly did as I struggled against the door. By the time I was finally able to get some good leverage on it and pry it all the way, I could practically feel myself sweating and my muscles screaming.

I could only put lean against my knees as I struggled to catch my breath, but nonetheless I managed a smirk as I saw the familiar form of Chrysalis in the corner of the room. The surprise on her face was well worth the likely sore muscles I would suffer from. Hell, I think that was arguably one of the most out of character expressions I had ever seen her make.

"So, to finish my thought-," I began, giving a wave as I caught my breath, "am not!"

I'd say I won that argument, thank you very much!

"Thou... thou returned."

I shook my head as I heard Nightmare Moon's voice echo through my head once more, already taking the opportunity to make her way out of the room it had seemed.

"Well, yeah. What, you think I was going leave you two?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As a matter of fact, that's exactly what they both thought. After Jeremy had somehow phased through the door, Chrysalis began to bang on the door with all her might in an attempt to follow suit. Suffice to say it didn't amount to much, as she soon gave up, moving to the corner of the room and attempting to sleep off the anger and misery she had felt. Nightmare Moon, having no way of following through the door either, settled on keeping Chrysalis' mind company as she did so.

So when the door's lock clicked, Chrysalis' head shot straight up and Nightmare Moon quickly severed their connection as the door slowly but surely opened. The time needed for the hunk of metal to be dragged away was agonizing, but the sight of Jeremy smiling up at the two almost made it worth it.

Either he had been freed, or he suddenly had found a way to escape, that much was certain. Yet he chose to stay back and help the two. There would be no time to dawdle on these thoughts, however, as Jeremy straightened himself and spoke once more.

"All right, everyone out. Mind that first step and the unicorn shaped bump on the floor." Jeremy quipped. Rather than so much as receiving a chuckle in return, however, Jeremy watched in silence as Chyrsalis expression shifted from one of surprise to one of concern. Within the shadows surrounding them, Nightmare Moon made her way to the body of the guard, well aware of what inspired this concern to begin with.

It was not out of a sense of worry for the health of the stallion. Rather, she was much more due to the fact that the guard had been a unicorn.

Chrysalis quickly stood as she made her way to her bipedal roommate.

"Did he see you before incapacitated him?" She asked, a sense of urgency in her voice.

Jeremy could only raise a brow at the question.

"Uh, yeah, for a few seconds, I guess. Doesn't really seem like it matters, but-"

"You foal! In that time, the guard could have sent a warning to the other guardsman!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Look, in my defense, I had no idea how magic worked. I still don't know how it works, so how was I supposed to know they could do stuff like that?

And as if to add insult to injury, Nightmare Moon elected to chime in at that moment, confirming just how badly I had apparently fucked up.

"She is correct. We have found magical remnants from a telecommunication spell."

In human terms, it was only just about then that I realized I had apparently tripped the silent alarm.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Celestia let out a sigh of happiness and relief as she looked over her previously immense pile of paperwork. There was only one more paper to sign. The last requisition paper of the season. Granted, she would likely have much more work thrust upon her by the end of the day, but by all means the worst of it was now out of the way.

Bliss in her imminent reach, she began to bring the quill down to the paper, her magical grip surrounding it in its usual golden glow. Just as she was about to make the last signature though, a group of her and her sister's guards rushed into the room, practically breaking down the door in the process. Celestia, normally quite composed, flinched. As such, the quill in her grasp shot straight through the paper, directly into the ink pot, then straight through the table. Celestia could only blink as she looked at the newly formed holes before her, as well as the spreading ink from the now broken inkwell. A breath escaping her as she realized she would need a new copy to sign, as well as more ink, a new quill, and likely a request for table repairs.

She was already mentally tracing out the processes she would need to perform as she turned to look towards the guards, stopping only as she saw the look of grim seriousness behind their many muzzles.

"Your majesty, we received an urgent relay message from GlassCannon below! One of the three prisoners in the depths have escaped!" Celestia froze at the news, shock being the first sensation to hit her as her jaw tensed. Within a moment though, she recovered, realizing just what had been said. Her eyes narrowed as she threw all sense of concern for everything but the present away.

"Ready yourselves to capture and retrieve!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"... Shit. Go! Go now!" I yelled at the two, pointing to the hall that I assumed would lead us out of the dungeon. Specifically the literal only passage that there was.

It wasn't much of an option, obviously, but beggars cant be choosers.

Chrysalis rushed past me and rounded the corner before I had even looked back. It was the fastest I had seen her move in quite some time. By which I meant, at all.

So I was a little bit caught off guard.

Behind her, for all of a moment, I watched a small round shadow followed as it left the darkened hall and joined the torch lit path leading around the corner. It left a short wispy trail as it went along, seemingly marking and staining the ground before just as quickly disappearing.

Again, I was caught off guard.

I was honestly expecting something a little more intimidating, or with more eyes, or-

FUCK, RAMBLING AGAIN.

God, and I've got some bad news too. I was just about as distracted back then as I was just now. So by the time I finally got around to making a run for it, well...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As quickly as she could, Celestia teleported herself and her guards down to the lowest dungeons of the castle. Normally, she wouldn't risk such precise teleportation with such a large group of ponies, but she had to act quickly before any of the three had any chance to escape.

She had to recapture the prisoner that was out and keep this situation under control. If anypony learned of their escape, even if it was for all of a moment, it would without doubt lead to a panic.

Fortunately for her, one of the individuals she was after had been far too slow for their own good.

Before the flash of light from her spell could so much as begin to fade, Celestia felt something impact against her, not quite enough to hurt her, but certainly enough to give her a shock. Taking a step back, she looked down towards where the impact had come from, her eyes landing squarely on the sole human in Equestrian as they held their eyes closed from the sudden bright light that had likely blinded him.

She took a moment to look over the prisoner, already trying to piece together how he may have escaped, before then illuminating the hall with another surge of magic. To her chagrin, the steel door to the chamber at the end of the hall hung open. The chamber itself, even worse, lay completely empty.

No longer was this a simple incident. This was now a full-scale disaster.

She barely restrained herself from grinding her teeth as she looked down to the human, who by now was finally able to look through the sudden onset of light as his eyes adjusted. Already, the guards were surrounding him, spears brandished to ensure that they could easily react should something be attempted against them.

She leaned her head down towards the prisoner and spoke in a low yet clear tone. Her voice was even and controlled enough to caress silk, yet dangerous enough to tear apart steel.

"...Where are they?" She questioned.

The prisoner, despite her words, seemed to look at her more annoyed than anything else. Maybe it had been how long he had been in the chamber. Maybe it was as a result of the pain he felt from falling to the floor yet again. Maybe he was just in a bad mood, or maybe it was just instinctual, but the prisoner felt his own jaw tense as a sense of irritation overcame him.

As he picked himself up off of the ground and dusted himself off, acting as though he weren't being glared at by the mare that moved the sun over the world above them and a battalion of her guards, he found his thoughts wandering for a clever response. Something. Anything.

He looked towards her and gave a glare of his own. If looks could kill, Celestia would have been killed a hundred times over. Then again, the human would have been killed over a million times, and he knew this. Still, he finally found the words.

"How about you check up your enormous a-" He was cut off rather quickly as a metal tray hit him over the back of the head, effectively rendering him silent and non-hostile. Behind him was the royal guard by the name 'GlassCannon', an oddly shaped bruise clearly visible through his metal helmet as he glared at the creature he had just returned a less than pleasant favor to.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I mean, honestly, I probably deserved that. Besides, I wasn't about to say anything all that clever to start with.