It was a bright, shimmering day in the wonderful equine-filled land known as Equestria. And Twilight Sparkle was walking down the street, heading home after a long day of researching snails. As she opened the door to the library, a strange odor wafted into her nostrils.
“What the buck is that?” Twilight’s nose wrinkled at the peculiar smell. “Spike, have you been eating the green crap from under the fridge again?”
Silence.
Twilight sighed and trotted up the staircase, shouting his name all the way up. When she arrived at the top, she took another sniff. The dreadful stink appeared to be coming from her bathroom. As Twilight opened the door, her eyes widened and her jaw slowly dropped at the sight in front of her.
Her normally pure-white bathroom was completely in a state of disrepair, and lying in the centre was the small purple dragon she called her number one assistant, lying face-down in a small pool of his own blood. Twilight tried to scream, but all that came out was came out was an incoherent mess of butchered words reminiscent of what a foal would say if they had just found out that Hearth’s Warming Eve was cancelled.
Twilight opened the door to the building. She had just came back from Spike’s funeral,thankful that Fluttershy had been able to throw something together last minute, and glad that all of her friends had been able to show up on such short notice.
The smell was gone, and Twilight forced a small smile. Twilight sighed as she slowly walked up to her bedroom. She sat down at her computer and pressed the small orange button on the bottom of the monitor, causing it to blip to life.
Twilight had one new Skype™ message.
Taking hold of the mouse with a hoof, she maneuvered the cursor down to the taskbar at the bottom of the screen. She then clicked, and a Skype™ window opened up. She scrolled down her contact list to see who had messaged her. She scrolled down her contacts—all six of them.
Fluttershy.
Pinkie Pie.
Rainbow Dash (1).
Rarity.
Shining Armor.
Spike.
Oh. Spike’s contact information. He wouldn’t be needing it any longer. Twilight grimaced as she right clicked on his name and hesitated for a moment before deleting him.
Applejack—lacking a computer—did not have a Skype™ account, which upset Twilight whenever she wanted to talk to her, but didn’t want to make the trek to Sweet Apple Acres
Twilight clicked on Rainbow Dash’s username and the Skype™ window changed to her chat.
[19:17:27] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: gflaifklbargasdklbrae
[19:17:59] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: gah soory. hard to type wit hoofs.
[19:51:34] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: hey egghead u there?
[20:05:36] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: egghead
[20:35:41] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: egGHEAD
[20:41:45] Twilight Sparkle: Yes, Rainbow Dash?
[20:42:36] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: sup faget
[20:42:51] Twilight Sparkle: Nothing much, really. And please refrain from calling me a small bundle of sticks, if you can.
[20:44:04] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: ok ok calm your mare parts down
[20:44:37] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: i just wanted to show you this cool pic
[20:45:69] Twilight Sparkle: No. After that “Lemon Party” you linked me to last week, I refuse to click any links you send me. -_-
[20:47:14] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: aww come on
[20:47:35] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: http://www.notarealwebsite.com/
[20:47:55] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: its cool i promise
Twilight Sparkle clicked on the link that Rainbow Dash sent her via Skype™. Then, unexpectedly, her CD drive popped open.
"wat," Twilight Sparkle said.
Twilight looked at her CD drive. She started to wonder, was this real? Was it actually happening? Hell, was anything real? Time started to slow down into a whirlwind of blurry motion as the inner complexities of her mind ordered her hoof to raise from the mouse.
But she just couldn’t do it.
The mare lacked the emotional strength to lift her hoof up. She started to think; maybe her CD drive popping out had some deeper meaning; like it was some kind of divine intervention. Twilight’s hoof trembled as she forced it off of the mouse, using all of her energy to keep her hoof in the air. She moved her hoof towards the drive, her breathing slow and heavy as she struggled to keep herself from toppling out of her seat. Twilight could feel the sweat forming on her brow as her anxiety started to get worse, causing her heartbeat to increase and her pupils to dilate out of fear. Her hoof lightly brushed against something. She looked down the length of her arm, eventually realising she had touched the CD drive.
First contact.
Twilight let out a squeal of excitement as she started to push the piece of ergonomically designed plastic back into its respective slot. She managed to get about halfway without any problems. Then it jammed. Twilight blinked in confusion as she looked at it. Just what was going on? She gave it a hard push, but it felt as if the mighty King Sombra himself was holding it open. Twilight Sparkle grunted and pressed again. It refused to budge. Twilight screamed and pressed against it with all of her strength. Eventually, it gave way to what she believed was her immense power and shut with a satisfying click. Twilight let out a sigh and sat back upright.
And then the CD drive popped open again.
Twilight looked at it in defeat. “Fine!” she yelled. “Have it your way!”
She then promptly burst into tears and looked back at her screen.
[21:01:51] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: twilight?
[21:17:12] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: hello
[21:46:24] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: equestria to egghead
She had been screwing around for almost an hour trying to get her damned CD drive back in.
[21:47:14] Twilight Sparkle: Hello. Sorry.
[21:49:34] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: hey where were you
[21:53:33] Twilight Sparkle: I was having a mental breakdown as the metaphorical phallus of Discord was repeatedly rammed into my mouth due to my computer being mere steps away from exploding.
[21:58:51] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: uh what
[22:00:00] Twilight Sparkle: My CD drive popped out.
[22:02:51] Rainbow “Swagalitious” Dash: oh yeah that’s what the website does
Twilight reread that last message several times before it sunk in.
It was at that moment that she logged off of Skype™ and never logged back in.
