Shogun Deezutra vs. The Pastby trahzoChaptersAct 2: Pinkiespike vs. GarildaPrologue: The Shogun Appears!Act 1: The Darkness Appears!Act 3: Defend Fluttershy: Big Mac, Discord, and Angel vs. Queen ChrysalisAct 4: Princess Twilight Sparkle vs. The Mane-iac!Act 5. Rainbow Dash vs. King Sombra!Act 6: Rarity's one sided fight!Act 7: Applejack vs. Dark Applejack! A Secret Truth.Final Act: Deezutra vs. Xeenam! It's Really Been Long The Last Time We Met!Act 2: Pinkiespike vs. Garilda"Okay dork, time form me to finally settle this!" "Hey, Stinky Pie, I want payback!" "Those voices!" Pinkiespike already knew who those were. "That's right!" the 2 said "Garble!" "Gilda!" "And look, the 2 of us became boyfriend & girlfriend for double the danger!" They answered as they held hands "Garble and Gilda, so together you're..." Pinkie was then cut off "Don't say it!" Said Gilda "You're..." Then Spike was cut off "Nooooooo..." Said Garble "You're..."Then Pinkiespike was cutoff "We said don't say it!" they both said. "Garilda? Hahaha." Granny Smith said as she passed by. "Yes, yes, yes! We're Garilda!" Said Garble "That couple name sounds so stupid! That's why we refuse to hear it!" "I don't know, sounds kinda nice." said Spike. "Just like our couple name!" Then She & Spike held hands, looked at each other with cute eyes & said..."Pinkiespike." Then they nuzzled. "Ugh, even though me and Garble are together, doesn't mean we're that disgustingly cute!" "Wait, what's that around your finger?" Then they both held up their ring fingers. "We got married!" "Ah, Spike, even though we're enemies, I gotta say that you just threw your life away!" *Bitch slap!* "Hey, what was that for? Wait, were you seriously expecting me to propose?!" "Every girl wants to get married you idiot! I know, we talked about how meaningless marriage is & we can be happy with being boyfriend & girlfriend, but even so, even if I did say no, I still wanna hear it!" "Haha, Garble's in the dog house!" Pinkie mocked!" "Enough of this mindless talking, let's fight!" Gilda made the 1st move and was countered by Spike! Then Spike set both his hands a blaze to fire punch Garble! Sure dragons are fireproof, but the fire fists were much more fierce! Ha, just look at the slow motion punches, Spike was beating the hell outta him causing him to cough up blood & mucus! Gilda tried to attack but Pinkie called Dan over to help her! Dan came over in a sec and began using guns! Gilda was so fast Dan couldn't get a clear shot! Then he was punched back to his universe by Gilda! Pinkie then stuck a cupcake in her eye! "AAAAAAAH THAT STINGS SO BA..." Then Gilda was cutoff as Pinkie hit her away with...is that Amy's Piko Piko Hammer? "That's it! Come 'ere you bitch!" Gilda was coming in fast! "Pinkie, catch!" Spike pulled a bowling ball out of his bag of tricks! Tossed it to his wife, then Pinkie put it in her Party Cannon, and fired! It got Gilda right in the gut! Gilda's body was torn apart & she fell dead! "Gilda! Okay, you guys are in for it!" Then Garble roared and became bigger, then he started punching Spike and as Spike lay there taking the hits, Pinkie ran over to block the hit that could've killed him! "Spike, you gotta go into knight mode!" "Good idea, IMAGINAAAAAAATION!!!" Then Spike turned into the muscular knight he always imagined he'd be one day! The gallant hero, with sword in hand ran up the enemy's tail, then as he made it to the head, he jumped into the air & used the momentum from falling to create a giant cut in the back of Garble's neck! (Hey, an Attack on Titan reference!) "Roaaaaaaaaar!" then Garble fell dead, on top of Gilda! "Oh yeah, we're killers!" Pinkie said in her victory dance "Uh, not the best story to tell our kids don't you think?" "Okay, we'll tell them when they're teenagers." "Deal." Then they kissed as the sounds of dying and explosions continued on! Prologue: The Shogun Appears!It was a quiet night in Canterlot, until a portal from another world opened up! That portal spit out something only Twilight Sparkle & Spike have seen from the movie! His Shitagi (Samurai Shirt) had a flaming pattern all around it! The Hakama (Samurai Pants) was bitch black like ash! His Left hand wielded a magical spiked golden sword that had the face of a dragon at the tip and a purple hilt, while his Right hand wielded a Kanabo! His eyes were brown like the mighty grizzly bear! His hair was black and tied up in a ponytail (Very Manly!). He was standing there motionless, then he started walking only to be halted by the Canterlot Royal Guard! "Halt, who & what are you?" He looked around, seeing he was surrounded! "I said tell us who and what you are!" The guard insisted. Then he raised his sword, creating a dust storm "What the? Gack!" "Gyah!" "Arrrrgh!" The guards were all beaten to submission lightning fast! Then that's when... "What is the meaning of this?" Princess Celestia said as she and Luna descended from the sky. "H-he beat us with the hilt of his blade!" They looked towards the mysterious man. Luna thought he was a threat, but Princess Celestia saw light within him, she walked towards him, and spoke. "You are a very formidable fighter. Tell me, what is your name?" "I, am Deezutra Xargashio! I am a Samurai General, but sadly as you can see, I don't have an army to lead anymore because of a horrible man who killed them all! I have been hopping through dimensions, worlds, and universes because he told me that our final battle would take place somewhere called Equestria! Tell me, is this the place I seek?" "Yes, it is!" "Then, my journey is over, I shall wait till he arrives!" Then, before he left. "Wait, would you like to enlist in my army?" "..." "You can command an army, since you were after all a general!" "...Okay!" So, throughout the years, Shogun Deezutra fought alongside his very own army of Stallions! Sending criminals into the slammer, bringing down crime lords, serial killers and cereal killers were executed, that guy you thought was a rapist was beaten down as well! Shogun Deezutra was the greatest general in existence! One day he was told to leave Canterlot and watch over Ponyville. That's when he made great friends. They didn't think anything at all except befriend him when introduced to this brand new creature they have never seen before. Act 1: The Darkness Appears!"I'm so happy you 2 are together!" said Twilight Sparkle "But where are you 2 going to live?" pointed out Deezutra "Well, we already had that planned out." "Really?" asked Deezutra "No, we haven't." Pinkie replied, as her mane deflated. "Oh Pinkie, don't worry about it, we'll figure something out, after all, we are in this together!" then her mane inflated spontaneously! "Your right Spikey, we will figure this out, not me!" "Glad that you've come to your senses." Then the 2 hugged. "Alright, we need about 3 bedrooms in case we get twins or want another child." "Yeah, and it needs a big backyard so our kids can play and have a camp out with his or her friends." Twilight smiled at how grown-up Spike has become. Everyone else was happy on how Pinkie has stopped being so stupid. Then there was a loud slam! "What was that?" Said Rainbow Dash. "It came from outside!" pointed out Rarity They all exited Sugarcube Corner to see a gigantic black mist! "So, this is when it happens huh?" "What was that?" Asked Fluttershy. "Mmuahahahahahahahahahaha!" The laugh came from a dark and threatening voice! Then coming out from the dark mist, was an army of samurai, weilding spears and bows, and not just samurai, but Goblins who held clubs & Diamond Dogs as well! "...My men!" Deezutra held in his rage. "Huh?" said Applejack. Following them...a giant robot with sickly white eyes on it's box shaped face, tanks for feet, a cylindracal torso, and giant pincers! On the left & right of the robot where 2 yellow cyclopses with mallets! Above, where changelings and crows crows, which held explosives in their talons. Finally, standing on top of the giant robot, 8 mysterious figures! "HALT!" commanded their leader. Then all 8 jumped off the robot and landed safely in front of the army! "Shogun Deezutra Xargashio! We meet at last for the final time!" The man, or rather monster who spoke was humanoid, completely pitch black, except in the eyes & teeth. His eyes were scarlet like the Scarlet fever, and his pearly white teeth where sharp and had fangs on both ends! Everytime he spoke, fire leaked out! He had a demon wing on the right and an angel of darkness wing on the left he had no fingernails, they were infact replaced by claws, he had a Ninjaken sword with an evil grin in one hand and a Kanabo in the other, he wore black shogun armor and had the characters for 'the end of it all' written in blood on his scarf. Finally, a dark aura was just radiating off of him! "Shogun Xeenam Mostalgihu! I will have my revenge for what you have done to the people and the city from our former home!" "Look at the determination you have in those eyes of your's pathetic! Today is the day I take over all worlds and the day you die!" "And we'll make sure he wins!" Said Twilight. "RIGHT!!!" Said everyone else "My generals, would you kindly take care of his friends?" "Yes master Xeenam!" Then the battle began! Act 3: Defend Fluttershy: Big Mac, Discord, and Angel vs. Queen Chrysalis"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Fluttershy was flying away because the changelings and Queen Chrysalis were trying to kill her, they then had her cornered in a dead end alley way! Was this the end of her? *Smack* *Poof* *Wham* No, it was in fact not! As Fluttershy looked up, Big Mac, Angel Bunny & Discord all had there backs turned to Fluttershy with their fists up to fight! "Well, well, well, looks like the shy one has some boyfriends to do the fighting for her!" "Shut-up you bugly fuck!" said Angel! "Angel, language, and when did you learn how to talk?" "You know the 5th toxic waste dump we stopped? Well, the waste kinda got on my fur & effected my vocal cords! I've been keeping it a secret until the right time comes!" Angel explained. Imagine him with G1 Spike's voice or some generic little cartoon boy voice. "I've arrived to protect you my friend!" Discord explained "Okay, so big Mac, what about you? I thought you'd help Applejack." "...Uh, Eeyup?" "He's right, let's talk about this later, right now! Fluttershy, you may wanna look away because I know you can't take so much violence!" Said Angel So Fluttershy stood bye & let the 3 fight! Angel was secretly a kung-furry master, who was the best at kicks and yiff! He fucked all of them over & actually fucked them as well! Discord, used his magic to hit them with various things. Trombones, Deer horns, Flat Screen T.V.'s, Spatula's, etc. etc. and he even smacked a Changeling upside the head causing it to whine like a bitch! Big Mac, no matter how many foes pile on him, he overpowers every last one of them! he mowed down everyone with his brute strength to get to the Queen! Soon, he got to her! "Hmm..you're a very silent one, you wouldn't even explain why you came..." She monolouged for minutes and Big Mac decided to just shut her up! *POW!* Big Mac refused to tell why he came, he just attacked and attacked but he may have done a little to much because even though she stopped moving and there was blood all over her body and his hands, he didn't stop. then Fluttershy tried to stop him. "Big Mac, quit it, she's de..." she was stopped when Big Mac kissed her. So they stayed like that for a while because Fluttershy now understands why Big Mac came to help her. "Oh my, bold move Big Macintosh." Said Discord. "Indeed." Angel chimed in. Act 4: Princess Twilight Sparkle vs. The Mane-iac!Twilight Sparkle had her shields up but didn't know how long she could keep them up before she tires out and when the Mane-iac breaks through. then she realizes she's an alicorn! She could do 2 spells at the same time! So she used the freeze ray she learned from The Power Ponies episode! Then she lowered her shield then caused even more immobility by using her stop spell from the Castlemania episode! But I'll be going Final Fantasy on this shit & say she went with the highest level of stop & used stopza! Twilight then went in for the attack & temporarily made herself bigger to stomp on her she shrunk down afterwards! The Mane-iac was still okay, then slashed with 10 whips but she manuevered past all of them thanks to Rainbow Dash's training! (Rainbow Dash taught her how to do a Sonic Rainboom, which apparently makes you move at the speed of Mach10! That's fucking 7700mph! Holy shit right? But I still side with Sonic the Hedgehog!). "MINIONS!!!" "(Of course, villain's traditional cowardly move!)" Twilight fired a magic aura blast that went in 4 separate directions & spun around mowing down everylast minion! Then a tendril flew at her! *GRAB!* *Cackle! Cackle! Cackle!* "Surrender! I've got you!" "You have no idea who you're messing with!" Twilight then set herself on fire "Preferring to die on your own terms? Sorry, no can do!" Twilight flew out in a ball of fire & rose up to the sky then... *KA-BOOM!!!* Twilight Sparkle transformed into her Rapidash form from the episode: Feeling Pinkie Keen! Then Twilight Sparkle fcharged up a fire ball! "Whatever it is you're doing, your not going to do it!" She then pulled out the Hairspray ray of doom! Attempted to use it, but then Twilight flew over to the top of the fireball to avoid it! After a while, she kicked it down! Mane-iac tried running but the fireball homed in on her, then the inevitable happened & she got burned to a crisp! "Have fun in Tartaros!" Act 5. Rainbow Dash vs. King Sombra!Rainbow Dash was face-to-face with a badass bad guy! Rainbow tried to hit him but, he turned into mist, and then circled around her! spikes then popped out from the inside the ring of mist! He tried to shred Rainbow to shreds but she was just way too fast! Sombra used a spell to hold her down. Then he started punching her, with no mercy! "After I'm finished, that damn dragon & Princess of romance are next!" Rainbow Dash was able to use enough sheer force of will to break through the magical binds & counter punch him really hard in between the eyes & nose. She then used her skills as a black belt in karate to unleashe a beat down that didn't stop! King Sombra then turned into mist and went behind her! He then drop kicked Rainbow! Sombra then kicked her while she was down! Rainbow had a hard time to get up, but then... "Leave Rainbow Dash alone!" Cried out Scootaloo. Sombra was distracted allowing Rainbow Dash the edge! She managed to get up. Rainbow got her revenge by starting off by kicking him in the left ear! Then a chop to the forehead. Rainbow went in for a punch, but then Sombra grabbed it, and slammed her into a wall! Then he held her up by the neck. Rainbow struggled to get him to let go. He threw Rainbow Dash to the floor! Sombra picked up Rainbow then dropped her down so his knee got her in the back, then he kicked Rainbow causing her to roll. Rainbow Dash used a long stick to pick herself up off the ground. She saw King Sombra coming in fast! Rainbow hid the stick behind her back! Then she smacked Sombra in the face! Rainbow Dash then continued hitting him with the stick then soon it broke in half! Sombra got very angry! "You are a very durable bitch, you know that!" Then he started becoming giant. Sombra then tried to crush her but she was too fast! "Catch me if you can sucka..." She completely forgot about the magical binds! "Die!" *SLAM!* Rainbow was still breathing. "Grah! I can't believe you're still alive, but just barely! I'll leave you alone to die!" She couldn't get up, her breathing was shallow, her sight was going blank, but then... "You can do it Rainbow Dash!" Scootaloo's words got her to wake up & not give up! Then a gloved hand offered yo get her up. "So, ready to go super?" "If it'll help me defeat King Sombra, then sure!" Then all 7 Chaos Emeralds surrounded them...wait a minute, Chaos Emeralds!? She teamed up with Sonic the Hedgehog! The both of then transformed into Super Sonic & Super Rainbow Dash! They flew towards King Sombra who was still searching for Spike in the chaos of the war! "Hey stupid!" Yelled Rainbow! "WHAT!? YOU'RE STILL ALIVE!?" "Let's do this Sonic!" "Yeah!" Then they killed King Sombra with a fusion of Sonic's boost & Rainbow Dash's Sonic Rainboom! "AAAAAAAAAAH!!!" Then for a 2nd time in a row, he blew up! "Whoa, looks like you can explode twice!" Spike commented as he & Pinkie took down a cyclops. "Alright, I gotta go! I was only passing by!" "Later!" She told Sonic as he ran off & killed all of the enemies in his path outta Ponyville. Act 6: Rarity's one sided fight!"Oh, I'm going to..." Then Rarity smacked a bitch, AKA Prince Blueblood! "Hey! How dare you assault the face of a roy..." She interrupted him again! "You are no prince! A true prince is a gentleman like your cousin Spike!" Then she slapped the bitch AKA Prince Blueblood multiple times. Blueblood tried to attack, but tripped ovet himself! Then Rarity placed Tom right on top of his back "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!" Blueblood screamed lika a little girl! Then got Tom off of him! Blueblood tried to use magic, but then Rarity slipped a magic negating ring on him! She then had Opal attack his face! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, make it stop!" He grabbed Opal trying to pry her off his face! "Don't you dare touch her!" She then bent his spine with her magic! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, FUCK!" Rarity then kicked the bitch, again AKA Prince Blueblood! "Oh Sweetie Belle!" She called out. "Yeah sis?" "I want you to scream really loud in this man's ear!" She did as Rarity commanded. High pitched whines were screeching & ringing! Blueblood just couldn't fight anymore even though he did Jack diddley squat! The final blow was struck after he was crushed with Tom. "Really, the only true princes of Equestria are Shining Armor & Spike!" Act 7: Applejack vs. Dark Applejack! A Secret Truth."How many more of these guys are there?" Complained Applebloom. "No time for complaining, only time for doing!" Applejack said, as she lassoed a Goblin, forced it over to her & kicked it into the next county! A dark mist wrapped around Applejack "What in tarnation?" The mist then moved away from her then took on her form! This monster looked like Applejack except the orange was replaced by a darker shade, her stetson was replaced by a baseball cap, her green eyes were replaced by grey eyes, I wonder how her voice sounds. "Howdy!" Okay, low & demonic. "W-Who are you?" "Oh, I'm you! Doesn't the fact I look like you mean any thing you idiot?" "I know that but why become me?" "Oh right right! I'm the true you that you hid away for years! THE YOU WHO LOST HER CHANCE TO CONFESS HER SECRET FEELINGS TO SPIKE!!!" "WHAAAAAAAT!?" Pinkie screamed outta pure shock! "Applejack, is what she said true?" Spike asked. *SIGH!* "Yes, I was keeping it a secret for years trying to finally find that chance, but when you & Pinkie got together, I had to abandon a part of me..." Tears flowed out of her as she continued "...So that's why we haven't really talked much after that fateful night you 2. I just didn't want you to be concerned & live the rest of your days together, I know, I'm a horrible friend, I've been keeping a secret about being in love with one of my best friend's boyfriends. I'm sorry Pinkie & Spike, if you don't like me anymore that's alright. I promise not to be friends with you ever again. At least, I got to be honest." She then turned, with a sad aura coming out of her. Then Pinkie put a hand on Applejack's shoulder. "Whu?" Spike put his hand on the other. "Applejack, don't cry, we're all best friends till the very end!" Spike said "Yeah, no matter what, we'll always stick together." Pinkie added "You guys forgive me?" "Of course! Besides..." She then whispered in A.J.'s ear "...You can be our mistress." Applejack's smile came back, and she hugged them both! "Thanks you 2!" Then she turned to face the other one. "Alright Dark Applejack, You're going down!" "Grr! I HOPED TO BEAT YOU WITH PAINFUL EMOTIONAL SADNESS! GUESS I'LL JUST BEAT YOU WITHIN AN INCH OF YOUR LIVE, ALLOWING YOU TO SQUIRM FOR A WHILE BEFORE I THROW YOU INTO THE GROUND & BURY YOU ALIVE!!!" Dark Applejack ran toward Applejack, then Dark A.J. was tripped by a swift kick from Applejack! She then got on top. "I'll be the one beating you with in an inch of your life! I'm Applejack, the most dependable pony ever! I refuse to let anyone, even myself cause me to give up when my friends really need me, not even myself!" Then Applejack started beating Dark Applejack to a bloody pulp. "(Congratulations me, you've finally gotten over it.)" Then Dark Applejack dissolved. "Applejack, I'm so glad that you're..." He was cutoff by a kiss "Don't worry Spike, she's our new mistress." Spike wanted to object, but Applejack deserved it. Final Act: Deezutra vs. Xeenam! It's Really Been Long The Last Time We Met!*ting!* *ting!* *ting!* *ting!* *ting!* *ting!* "Firaga!" "Really? You still haven't made it to..." Xeenam was cutoff "Firaza!" "What!?" *Boom!* "H-how?" "It seems you've forgotten our sensei's teachings! Remember? He said to always keep your foe guessing! Zantetsuken!" "Gah! You even mastered the Zantetsuken! I'm impressed, but mastering these moves while I was gone wont save you! Dark Firaza!" "Reflega! Alright Xeenam, now take this! Fire Ball jutsu!" "Fire Ball what?" Xeenam jumped out of the way. "You may have been gone, but I hopped through the worlds, learning many amazing techniques! Now here I go! Steel Samurai Smelting!" *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* "Grah, minions, fight as I heal myself!" Xeenam commanded! Deezutra was then surrounded by his former army! "My men...it's me Deezutra! Xeenam is con..." He got interrupted "You seriously thought we were being mind controlled!? Boy, are you a joke! Hahahahaha..." The rest joined in on the laughter. "We were never being controlled in the 1st place! We didn't even like you on day one! So when Xeenam sacrificed his humanity, we actually intended to kill & rape your daughter! It was never by Xeenam's command! Yeah, we hated you that much, somehow a nerd like you became our general & we didn't take kindly to it! It was also our will that threw your wife into the machine that helped her go to other worlds never to be seen again! Your talks about being an honorable man made you sound like such a windbag! We can't believe how much of a pathetic man you are! Ahahahaha..." He was cutoff permanently by Shogun Deezutra's punch going right through the head! "YOU IDIOTS!!! How dare you? The point of being a samurai! Is being an honorable person! That is part the Samurai Code: Bushido! Looks like all of you dis-honorable men have now forfeited your lives to me! Now I must follow my duty, the other part of our strict samurai code & do my duty protecting my new home! BIG BANG ATTACK!" The explosion killed every last one of Xeenam's army & somehow all of the innocents and buildings were okay! I guess Pinkie did that. Xeenam was still alive because of a powerful barrier spell! "You may have obliterated my army, but not even an explosion of that calibur can cut through my barrier!" *Shing!* Then Deezutra broke through Xeenam's barrier! "WHAT!?" *Ting!* "Behold the shadowless thrust! I knew it would help me but I had no idea it worked this great! I guess it was the force of my magic sword allowing me to cut through!" "About that sword , where'd you get it?" "I got it from the souls of the dead citizens of our former home! The 10 millions of them poured every last drop of their magical energy to create it before they all crossed over to the after life!" "Grr, even in death, those damned people don't allow me to rule the worlds!" "Time to end it you demon!" *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* "Aaaaaaaah! Aaaaaaah! Aaaaaaaaaaaaah!" "Now, for the fi..." Then Deezutra was stabbed to the chest!" "ACK!" "Heh!" *Poof!* "What the!?" Then the dark sky glowed blue! Xeenam looked up & was in for an unbelievable sight! "Sage Art: Giant Rasengan Ultra Barrage!" "I'll see you in hell Shogun Deezutra!" "In Equestria, it's called Tartaros!" "Fuck you!" "That's buck you!" Then Xeenam was bombarded by countless Giant Rasengans! After that, the clouds parted showing a 100% clear sky! Everyone in Ponyville came to him! "Alright everypony, let's give a loud round of applause to our hero: Shogun Deezutra Xargashio!" Twilight said, as she & the rest of the Mane 7 picked him up & threw him repeatedly! Deezutra finally avenged the people of his former home! Then someone called out! "Dad!" "Riolu!" "Oh, sorry! I-I called yah dad again!" "Don't worry son, it's okay to call me that now!" "YAY!" Then Riolu hopped onto Deezutra's stomach before he was tossed again! "(All's well that ends well.)" Shogun Deezutra thought. Then a huge victory party was thrown, and Deezutra along with Riolu & The Mane 7 were granted eternal life by Princess Celestia as her gift to them for saving all worlds from an eventual doom by a powerful darkness! Then, Deezutra continued his duties, then soon the day came that he became captain of the royal guard. Pinkie & Spike had a daughter they named Shindig, who was just as wild as her mother. Oh boy, imagine the crazy antics the citizens would get into with this girl who will become the next Super Duper Party well half pony, but you know what I mean. THE END, now get lost!
Act 2: Pinkiespike vs. Garilda"Okay dork, time form me to finally settle this!" "Hey, Stinky Pie, I want payback!" "Those voices!" Pinkiespike already knew who those were. "That's right!" the 2 said "Garble!" "Gilda!" "And look, the 2 of us became boyfriend & girlfriend for double the danger!" They answered as they held hands "Garble and Gilda, so together you're..." Pinkie was then cut off "Don't say it!" Said Gilda "You're..." Then Spike was cut off "Nooooooo..." Said Garble "You're..."Then Pinkiespike was cutoff "We said don't say it!" they both said. "Garilda? Hahaha." Granny Smith said as she passed by. "Yes, yes, yes! We're Garilda!" Said Garble "That couple name sounds so stupid! That's why we refuse to hear it!" "I don't know, sounds kinda nice." said Spike. "Just like our couple name!" Then She & Spike held hands, looked at each other with cute eyes & said..."Pinkiespike." Then they nuzzled. "Ugh, even though me and Garble are together, doesn't mean we're that disgustingly cute!" "Wait, what's that around your finger?" Then they both held up their ring fingers. "We got married!" "Ah, Spike, even though we're enemies, I gotta say that you just threw your life away!" *Bitch slap!* "Hey, what was that for? Wait, were you seriously expecting me to propose?!" "Every girl wants to get married you idiot! I know, we talked about how meaningless marriage is & we can be happy with being boyfriend & girlfriend, but even so, even if I did say no, I still wanna hear it!" "Haha, Garble's in the dog house!" Pinkie mocked!" "Enough of this mindless talking, let's fight!" Gilda made the 1st move and was countered by Spike! Then Spike set both his hands a blaze to fire punch Garble! Sure dragons are fireproof, but the fire fists were much more fierce! Ha, just look at the slow motion punches, Spike was beating the hell outta him causing him to cough up blood & mucus! Gilda tried to attack but Pinkie called Dan over to help her! Dan came over in a sec and began using guns! Gilda was so fast Dan couldn't get a clear shot! Then he was punched back to his universe by Gilda! Pinkie then stuck a cupcake in her eye! "AAAAAAAH THAT STINGS SO BA..." Then Gilda was cutoff as Pinkie hit her away with...is that Amy's Piko Piko Hammer? "That's it! Come 'ere you bitch!" Gilda was coming in fast! "Pinkie, catch!" Spike pulled a bowling ball out of his bag of tricks! Tossed it to his wife, then Pinkie put it in her Party Cannon, and fired! It got Gilda right in the gut! Gilda's body was torn apart & she fell dead! "Gilda! Okay, you guys are in for it!" Then Garble roared and became bigger, then he started punching Spike and as Spike lay there taking the hits, Pinkie ran over to block the hit that could've killed him! "Spike, you gotta go into knight mode!" "Good idea, IMAGINAAAAAAATION!!!" Then Spike turned into the muscular knight he always imagined he'd be one day! The gallant hero, with sword in hand ran up the enemy's tail, then as he made it to the head, he jumped into the air & used the momentum from falling to create a giant cut in the back of Garble's neck! (Hey, an Attack on Titan reference!) "Roaaaaaaaaar!" then Garble fell dead, on top of Gilda! "Oh yeah, we're killers!" Pinkie said in her victory dance "Uh, not the best story to tell our kids don't you think?" "Okay, we'll tell them when they're teenagers." "Deal." Then they kissed as the sounds of dying and explosions continued on!
Prologue: The Shogun Appears!It was a quiet night in Canterlot, until a portal from another world opened up! That portal spit out something only Twilight Sparkle & Spike have seen from the movie! His Shitagi (Samurai Shirt) had a flaming pattern all around it! The Hakama (Samurai Pants) was bitch black like ash! His Left hand wielded a magical spiked golden sword that had the face of a dragon at the tip and a purple hilt, while his Right hand wielded a Kanabo! His eyes were brown like the mighty grizzly bear! His hair was black and tied up in a ponytail (Very Manly!). He was standing there motionless, then he started walking only to be halted by the Canterlot Royal Guard! "Halt, who & what are you?" He looked around, seeing he was surrounded! "I said tell us who and what you are!" The guard insisted. Then he raised his sword, creating a dust storm "What the? Gack!" "Gyah!" "Arrrrgh!" The guards were all beaten to submission lightning fast! Then that's when... "What is the meaning of this?" Princess Celestia said as she and Luna descended from the sky. "H-he beat us with the hilt of his blade!" They looked towards the mysterious man. Luna thought he was a threat, but Princess Celestia saw light within him, she walked towards him, and spoke. "You are a very formidable fighter. Tell me, what is your name?" "I, am Deezutra Xargashio! I am a Samurai General, but sadly as you can see, I don't have an army to lead anymore because of a horrible man who killed them all! I have been hopping through dimensions, worlds, and universes because he told me that our final battle would take place somewhere called Equestria! Tell me, is this the place I seek?" "Yes, it is!" "Then, my journey is over, I shall wait till he arrives!" Then, before he left. "Wait, would you like to enlist in my army?" "..." "You can command an army, since you were after all a general!" "...Okay!" So, throughout the years, Shogun Deezutra fought alongside his very own army of Stallions! Sending criminals into the slammer, bringing down crime lords, serial killers and cereal killers were executed, that guy you thought was a rapist was beaten down as well! Shogun Deezutra was the greatest general in existence! One day he was told to leave Canterlot and watch over Ponyville. That's when he made great friends. They didn't think anything at all except befriend him when introduced to this brand new creature they have never seen before.
Act 1: The Darkness Appears!"I'm so happy you 2 are together!" said Twilight Sparkle "But where are you 2 going to live?" pointed out Deezutra "Well, we already had that planned out." "Really?" asked Deezutra "No, we haven't." Pinkie replied, as her mane deflated. "Oh Pinkie, don't worry about it, we'll figure something out, after all, we are in this together!" then her mane inflated spontaneously! "Your right Spikey, we will figure this out, not me!" "Glad that you've come to your senses." Then the 2 hugged. "Alright, we need about 3 bedrooms in case we get twins or want another child." "Yeah, and it needs a big backyard so our kids can play and have a camp out with his or her friends." Twilight smiled at how grown-up Spike has become. Everyone else was happy on how Pinkie has stopped being so stupid. Then there was a loud slam! "What was that?" Said Rainbow Dash. "It came from outside!" pointed out Rarity They all exited Sugarcube Corner to see a gigantic black mist! "So, this is when it happens huh?" "What was that?" Asked Fluttershy. "Mmuahahahahahahahahahaha!" The laugh came from a dark and threatening voice! Then coming out from the dark mist, was an army of samurai, weilding spears and bows, and not just samurai, but Goblins who held clubs & Diamond Dogs as well! "...My men!" Deezutra held in his rage. "Huh?" said Applejack. Following them...a giant robot with sickly white eyes on it's box shaped face, tanks for feet, a cylindracal torso, and giant pincers! On the left & right of the robot where 2 yellow cyclopses with mallets! Above, where changelings and crows crows, which held explosives in their talons. Finally, standing on top of the giant robot, 8 mysterious figures! "HALT!" commanded their leader. Then all 8 jumped off the robot and landed safely in front of the army! "Shogun Deezutra Xargashio! We meet at last for the final time!" The man, or rather monster who spoke was humanoid, completely pitch black, except in the eyes & teeth. His eyes were scarlet like the Scarlet fever, and his pearly white teeth where sharp and had fangs on both ends! Everytime he spoke, fire leaked out! He had a demon wing on the right and an angel of darkness wing on the left he had no fingernails, they were infact replaced by claws, he had a Ninjaken sword with an evil grin in one hand and a Kanabo in the other, he wore black shogun armor and had the characters for 'the end of it all' written in blood on his scarf. Finally, a dark aura was just radiating off of him! "Shogun Xeenam Mostalgihu! I will have my revenge for what you have done to the people and the city from our former home!" "Look at the determination you have in those eyes of your's pathetic! Today is the day I take over all worlds and the day you die!" "And we'll make sure he wins!" Said Twilight. "RIGHT!!!" Said everyone else "My generals, would you kindly take care of his friends?" "Yes master Xeenam!" Then the battle began!
Act 3: Defend Fluttershy: Big Mac, Discord, and Angel vs. Queen Chrysalis"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Fluttershy was flying away because the changelings and Queen Chrysalis were trying to kill her, they then had her cornered in a dead end alley way! Was this the end of her? *Smack* *Poof* *Wham* No, it was in fact not! As Fluttershy looked up, Big Mac, Angel Bunny & Discord all had there backs turned to Fluttershy with their fists up to fight! "Well, well, well, looks like the shy one has some boyfriends to do the fighting for her!" "Shut-up you bugly fuck!" said Angel! "Angel, language, and when did you learn how to talk?" "You know the 5th toxic waste dump we stopped? Well, the waste kinda got on my fur & effected my vocal cords! I've been keeping it a secret until the right time comes!" Angel explained. Imagine him with G1 Spike's voice or some generic little cartoon boy voice. "I've arrived to protect you my friend!" Discord explained "Okay, so big Mac, what about you? I thought you'd help Applejack." "...Uh, Eeyup?" "He's right, let's talk about this later, right now! Fluttershy, you may wanna look away because I know you can't take so much violence!" Said Angel So Fluttershy stood bye & let the 3 fight! Angel was secretly a kung-furry master, who was the best at kicks and yiff! He fucked all of them over & actually fucked them as well! Discord, used his magic to hit them with various things. Trombones, Deer horns, Flat Screen T.V.'s, Spatula's, etc. etc. and he even smacked a Changeling upside the head causing it to whine like a bitch! Big Mac, no matter how many foes pile on him, he overpowers every last one of them! he mowed down everyone with his brute strength to get to the Queen! Soon, he got to her! "Hmm..you're a very silent one, you wouldn't even explain why you came..." She monolouged for minutes and Big Mac decided to just shut her up! *POW!* Big Mac refused to tell why he came, he just attacked and attacked but he may have done a little to much because even though she stopped moving and there was blood all over her body and his hands, he didn't stop. then Fluttershy tried to stop him. "Big Mac, quit it, she's de..." she was stopped when Big Mac kissed her. So they stayed like that for a while because Fluttershy now understands why Big Mac came to help her. "Oh my, bold move Big Macintosh." Said Discord. "Indeed." Angel chimed in.
Act 4: Princess Twilight Sparkle vs. The Mane-iac!Twilight Sparkle had her shields up but didn't know how long she could keep them up before she tires out and when the Mane-iac breaks through. then she realizes she's an alicorn! She could do 2 spells at the same time! So she used the freeze ray she learned from The Power Ponies episode! Then she lowered her shield then caused even more immobility by using her stop spell from the Castlemania episode! But I'll be going Final Fantasy on this shit & say she went with the highest level of stop & used stopza! Twilight then went in for the attack & temporarily made herself bigger to stomp on her she shrunk down afterwards! The Mane-iac was still okay, then slashed with 10 whips but she manuevered past all of them thanks to Rainbow Dash's training! (Rainbow Dash taught her how to do a Sonic Rainboom, which apparently makes you move at the speed of Mach10! That's fucking 7700mph! Holy shit right? But I still side with Sonic the Hedgehog!). "MINIONS!!!" "(Of course, villain's traditional cowardly move!)" Twilight fired a magic aura blast that went in 4 separate directions & spun around mowing down everylast minion! Then a tendril flew at her! *GRAB!* *Cackle! Cackle! Cackle!* "Surrender! I've got you!" "You have no idea who you're messing with!" Twilight then set herself on fire "Preferring to die on your own terms? Sorry, no can do!" Twilight flew out in a ball of fire & rose up to the sky then... *KA-BOOM!!!* Twilight Sparkle transformed into her Rapidash form from the episode: Feeling Pinkie Keen! Then Twilight Sparkle fcharged up a fire ball! "Whatever it is you're doing, your not going to do it!" She then pulled out the Hairspray ray of doom! Attempted to use it, but then Twilight flew over to the top of the fireball to avoid it! After a while, she kicked it down! Mane-iac tried running but the fireball homed in on her, then the inevitable happened & she got burned to a crisp! "Have fun in Tartaros!"
Act 5. Rainbow Dash vs. King Sombra!Rainbow Dash was face-to-face with a badass bad guy! Rainbow tried to hit him but, he turned into mist, and then circled around her! spikes then popped out from the inside the ring of mist! He tried to shred Rainbow to shreds but she was just way too fast! Sombra used a spell to hold her down. Then he started punching her, with no mercy! "After I'm finished, that damn dragon & Princess of romance are next!" Rainbow Dash was able to use enough sheer force of will to break through the magical binds & counter punch him really hard in between the eyes & nose. She then used her skills as a black belt in karate to unleashe a beat down that didn't stop! King Sombra then turned into mist and went behind her! He then drop kicked Rainbow! Sombra then kicked her while she was down! Rainbow had a hard time to get up, but then... "Leave Rainbow Dash alone!" Cried out Scootaloo. Sombra was distracted allowing Rainbow Dash the edge! She managed to get up. Rainbow got her revenge by starting off by kicking him in the left ear! Then a chop to the forehead. Rainbow went in for a punch, but then Sombra grabbed it, and slammed her into a wall! Then he held her up by the neck. Rainbow struggled to get him to let go. He threw Rainbow Dash to the floor! Sombra picked up Rainbow then dropped her down so his knee got her in the back, then he kicked Rainbow causing her to roll. Rainbow Dash used a long stick to pick herself up off the ground. She saw King Sombra coming in fast! Rainbow hid the stick behind her back! Then she smacked Sombra in the face! Rainbow Dash then continued hitting him with the stick then soon it broke in half! Sombra got very angry! "You are a very durable bitch, you know that!" Then he started becoming giant. Sombra then tried to crush her but she was too fast! "Catch me if you can sucka..." She completely forgot about the magical binds! "Die!" *SLAM!* Rainbow was still breathing. "Grah! I can't believe you're still alive, but just barely! I'll leave you alone to die!" She couldn't get up, her breathing was shallow, her sight was going blank, but then... "You can do it Rainbow Dash!" Scootaloo's words got her to wake up & not give up! Then a gloved hand offered yo get her up. "So, ready to go super?" "If it'll help me defeat King Sombra, then sure!" Then all 7 Chaos Emeralds surrounded them...wait a minute, Chaos Emeralds!? She teamed up with Sonic the Hedgehog! The both of then transformed into Super Sonic & Super Rainbow Dash! They flew towards King Sombra who was still searching for Spike in the chaos of the war! "Hey stupid!" Yelled Rainbow! "WHAT!? YOU'RE STILL ALIVE!?" "Let's do this Sonic!" "Yeah!" Then they killed King Sombra with a fusion of Sonic's boost & Rainbow Dash's Sonic Rainboom! "AAAAAAAAAAH!!!" Then for a 2nd time in a row, he blew up! "Whoa, looks like you can explode twice!" Spike commented as he & Pinkie took down a cyclops. "Alright, I gotta go! I was only passing by!" "Later!" She told Sonic as he ran off & killed all of the enemies in his path outta Ponyville.
Act 6: Rarity's one sided fight!"Oh, I'm going to..." Then Rarity smacked a bitch, AKA Prince Blueblood! "Hey! How dare you assault the face of a roy..." She interrupted him again! "You are no prince! A true prince is a gentleman like your cousin Spike!" Then she slapped the bitch AKA Prince Blueblood multiple times. Blueblood tried to attack, but tripped ovet himself! Then Rarity placed Tom right on top of his back "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!" Blueblood screamed lika a little girl! Then got Tom off of him! Blueblood tried to use magic, but then Rarity slipped a magic negating ring on him! She then had Opal attack his face! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, make it stop!" He grabbed Opal trying to pry her off his face! "Don't you dare touch her!" She then bent his spine with her magic! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH, FUCK!" Rarity then kicked the bitch, again AKA Prince Blueblood! "Oh Sweetie Belle!" She called out. "Yeah sis?" "I want you to scream really loud in this man's ear!" She did as Rarity commanded. High pitched whines were screeching & ringing! Blueblood just couldn't fight anymore even though he did Jack diddley squat! The final blow was struck after he was crushed with Tom. "Really, the only true princes of Equestria are Shining Armor & Spike!"
Act 7: Applejack vs. Dark Applejack! A Secret Truth."How many more of these guys are there?" Complained Applebloom. "No time for complaining, only time for doing!" Applejack said, as she lassoed a Goblin, forced it over to her & kicked it into the next county! A dark mist wrapped around Applejack "What in tarnation?" The mist then moved away from her then took on her form! This monster looked like Applejack except the orange was replaced by a darker shade, her stetson was replaced by a baseball cap, her green eyes were replaced by grey eyes, I wonder how her voice sounds. "Howdy!" Okay, low & demonic. "W-Who are you?" "Oh, I'm you! Doesn't the fact I look like you mean any thing you idiot?" "I know that but why become me?" "Oh right right! I'm the true you that you hid away for years! THE YOU WHO LOST HER CHANCE TO CONFESS HER SECRET FEELINGS TO SPIKE!!!" "WHAAAAAAAT!?" Pinkie screamed outta pure shock! "Applejack, is what she said true?" Spike asked. *SIGH!* "Yes, I was keeping it a secret for years trying to finally find that chance, but when you & Pinkie got together, I had to abandon a part of me..." Tears flowed out of her as she continued "...So that's why we haven't really talked much after that fateful night you 2. I just didn't want you to be concerned & live the rest of your days together, I know, I'm a horrible friend, I've been keeping a secret about being in love with one of my best friend's boyfriends. I'm sorry Pinkie & Spike, if you don't like me anymore that's alright. I promise not to be friends with you ever again. At least, I got to be honest." She then turned, with a sad aura coming out of her. Then Pinkie put a hand on Applejack's shoulder. "Whu?" Spike put his hand on the other. "Applejack, don't cry, we're all best friends till the very end!" Spike said "Yeah, no matter what, we'll always stick together." Pinkie added "You guys forgive me?" "Of course! Besides..." She then whispered in A.J.'s ear "...You can be our mistress." Applejack's smile came back, and she hugged them both! "Thanks you 2!" Then she turned to face the other one. "Alright Dark Applejack, You're going down!" "Grr! I HOPED TO BEAT YOU WITH PAINFUL EMOTIONAL SADNESS! GUESS I'LL JUST BEAT YOU WITHIN AN INCH OF YOUR LIVE, ALLOWING YOU TO SQUIRM FOR A WHILE BEFORE I THROW YOU INTO THE GROUND & BURY YOU ALIVE!!!" Dark Applejack ran toward Applejack, then Dark A.J. was tripped by a swift kick from Applejack! She then got on top. "I'll be the one beating you with in an inch of your life! I'm Applejack, the most dependable pony ever! I refuse to let anyone, even myself cause me to give up when my friends really need me, not even myself!" Then Applejack started beating Dark Applejack to a bloody pulp. "(Congratulations me, you've finally gotten over it.)" Then Dark Applejack dissolved. "Applejack, I'm so glad that you're..." He was cutoff by a kiss "Don't worry Spike, she's our new mistress." Spike wanted to object, but Applejack deserved it.
Final Act: Deezutra vs. Xeenam! It's Really Been Long The Last Time We Met!*ting!* *ting!* *ting!* *ting!* *ting!* *ting!* "Firaga!" "Really? You still haven't made it to..." Xeenam was cutoff "Firaza!" "What!?" *Boom!* "H-how?" "It seems you've forgotten our sensei's teachings! Remember? He said to always keep your foe guessing! Zantetsuken!" "Gah! You even mastered the Zantetsuken! I'm impressed, but mastering these moves while I was gone wont save you! Dark Firaza!" "Reflega! Alright Xeenam, now take this! Fire Ball jutsu!" "Fire Ball what?" Xeenam jumped out of the way. "You may have been gone, but I hopped through the worlds, learning many amazing techniques! Now here I go! Steel Samurai Smelting!" *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* "Grah, minions, fight as I heal myself!" Xeenam commanded! Deezutra was then surrounded by his former army! "My men...it's me Deezutra! Xeenam is con..." He got interrupted "You seriously thought we were being mind controlled!? Boy, are you a joke! Hahahahaha..." The rest joined in on the laughter. "We were never being controlled in the 1st place! We didn't even like you on day one! So when Xeenam sacrificed his humanity, we actually intended to kill & rape your daughter! It was never by Xeenam's command! Yeah, we hated you that much, somehow a nerd like you became our general & we didn't take kindly to it! It was also our will that threw your wife into the machine that helped her go to other worlds never to be seen again! Your talks about being an honorable man made you sound like such a windbag! We can't believe how much of a pathetic man you are! Ahahahaha..." He was cutoff permanently by Shogun Deezutra's punch going right through the head! "YOU IDIOTS!!! How dare you? The point of being a samurai! Is being an honorable person! That is part the Samurai Code: Bushido! Looks like all of you dis-honorable men have now forfeited your lives to me! Now I must follow my duty, the other part of our strict samurai code & do my duty protecting my new home! BIG BANG ATTACK!" The explosion killed every last one of Xeenam's army & somehow all of the innocents and buildings were okay! I guess Pinkie did that. Xeenam was still alive because of a powerful barrier spell! "You may have obliterated my army, but not even an explosion of that calibur can cut through my barrier!" *Shing!* Then Deezutra broke through Xeenam's barrier! "WHAT!?" *Ting!* "Behold the shadowless thrust! I knew it would help me but I had no idea it worked this great! I guess it was the force of my magic sword allowing me to cut through!" "About that sword , where'd you get it?" "I got it from the souls of the dead citizens of our former home! The 10 millions of them poured every last drop of their magical energy to create it before they all crossed over to the after life!" "Grr, even in death, those damned people don't allow me to rule the worlds!" "Time to end it you demon!" *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* *Shing!* "Aaaaaaaah! Aaaaaaah! Aaaaaaaaaaaaah!" "Now, for the fi..." Then Deezutra was stabbed to the chest!" "ACK!" "Heh!" *Poof!* "What the!?" Then the dark sky glowed blue! Xeenam looked up & was in for an unbelievable sight! "Sage Art: Giant Rasengan Ultra Barrage!" "I'll see you in hell Shogun Deezutra!" "In Equestria, it's called Tartaros!" "Fuck you!" "That's buck you!" Then Xeenam was bombarded by countless Giant Rasengans! After that, the clouds parted showing a 100% clear sky! Everyone in Ponyville came to him! "Alright everypony, let's give a loud round of applause to our hero: Shogun Deezutra Xargashio!" Twilight said, as she & the rest of the Mane 7 picked him up & threw him repeatedly! Deezutra finally avenged the people of his former home! Then someone called out! "Dad!" "Riolu!" "Oh, sorry! I-I called yah dad again!" "Don't worry son, it's okay to call me that now!" "YAY!" Then Riolu hopped onto Deezutra's stomach before he was tossed again! "(All's well that ends well.)" Shogun Deezutra thought. Then a huge victory party was thrown, and Deezutra along with Riolu & The Mane 7 were granted eternal life by Princess Celestia as her gift to them for saving all worlds from an eventual doom by a powerful darkness! Then, Deezutra continued his duties, then soon the day came that he became captain of the royal guard. Pinkie & Spike had a daughter they named Shindig, who was just as wild as her mother. Oh boy, imagine the crazy antics the citizens would get into with this girl who will become the next Super Duper Party well half pony, but you know what I mean. THE END, now get lost!
