You Have What?

by They Call Me Infidel

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Other, Spike, Random, Pinkie Pie, Slice of Life, Human
Length: 1451

After a few years of living in ponyland you finally find out that the ponies have a sport you love.

A short story about bowling. I've never seen one on this site since I joined so... why not?

After some time of living in Ponyville you would've known all of the local hangouts right? Well the ponies here have a bowling alley and didn't tell you about it. Whelp... now I'm mad, time to take it out on some pins with some ponies.

Published 2014-04-27 05:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-04-27 05:50:01 UTC

Picking Lanes and Names

Bowling is all physics and energy distribution. It's F = ma. So it is actually one of the most science-y sports, because it literally is just a ball and a surface and objects to knock down. - Chris Hardwick

Throughout your time here in ponyland they've surprised you may times with what they have. But you've been kinda disappointed that they didn't have a favorite hobby of yours. But, you can understand since the sport requires the use of hands and being bi-pedal. And these ponies don't have either but they have magic so that should count, right?

Apparently so.

Right now I'm with the pony that told me that there is bowling here in Ponyville. Pinkie Pie.

"Aww... Come on. Don't tell me that you're still mad at me for not telling you about the local bowling alley," asks a worried Pinkie.

All you do is grunt at her.

She self-proclaims that she knows all about you over your stay here in Equestria and she never picked up about your joy for the sport in countless conversations? How does she not understand why? But you can't stay mad at her for long so you give her a true answer.

"Let's just go and bowl and I may forgive you for not telling me," you put out there.

At these words she brightens up but you remind her of that one word.

"May."

She just nods and goes back to leading you and your little posse of bowling enthusiasts. Applebloom, Scootaloo, Sweetie Belle, and Spike.

Apparently Spike loves to bowl whenever he has the time between cleaning up the library and gushing at Rarity. And all I can say about that is it's very few times he's been bowling. And with the trio of troublemakers they are trying their shot at another round of bowling cutie marks. I asked why they wanted to try again and all they said was they wanted to try a full game instead of just one frame. I asked if they could elaborate more but they just turned quiet.

Whatever.

Rounding a corner you come face-to-face to the bowling alley and you just stand still, planted to the ground.

The alley had the typical German hamlet feel to it just like the entire town, well, at least the first floor of it did. The second floor/roof of the building had a luscious rolling hill with the name of the alley on a funky looking wood board. The board kinda reminded me of a certain cartoon symbol that I use to know when I was young. What was it? Bomberang? I think that's it. Living here for some time tends to make your memory spotty. But never mind that, the sign read out "Holly Star Lanes" in funky lettering.

"Now where have I heard that name before?" You ask to yourself.

"I don't know, man. But let's bowl. I haven't bowled in forever since Twilight turned into a princess," replied Spike.

Shrugging you follow the purple and green assistant along with the others into the bowling alley.

Once entering the establishment just about all of your senses are attacked with the familiar items that come with an alley.

Taking a deep breath through your nose reveals the oily and musky smell of the Alley and its hard working, yet repeating, pin machines.

After that breath your ears pick up all of the noises inside. Weather it be the constant crashing of pins against bowling balls or the customers enjoying themselves with some arcade games like air hockey, ball drop, or ski ball. Or even the snack bar distributing various unhealthy or greasy foods.

Taking a look around while getting familiar with the smells of the Alley you firstly notice the pop-art that serves as background on the lanes. It's... girlier than what you've expected for a bowling alley. The background consists of a huge heart that varies every lanes but repeats every two lanes. One is pink with a dull peach colored heart while the lanes surrounding that one is reversed in color scheme.

Also upon your scouting of the Alley in the soles of your shoes you can feel every pin getting struck down by a ball. The floor feels as if you're on a battlefield that's getting bombarded with enemy mortar fire.

Let's not get into the taste part of this experience because you don't want to start licking the lanes or any bowling equipment. (Cue ball licking jokes.)

After a few moments of getting lost in your little slice of heaven Pinkie decides to interrupt you with a light rapping of her hoof on your leg.

"Um... I know you're still a bit mad at me," Pinkie replies with a bit of sorrow in her voice, "but I was hoping that with me buying three games and giving you a present would cheer you up!"

"I don't think the house would be holding onto any bowling shoes unless your 'present' does," you reply with sarcasm towards the pink mare.

She lowers her field of vision towards the ground and scuffs her hoof.

"Well... that's part of the present."

You lift an eyebrow at the pony. 'What does she mean by that?' you ask yourself.

Taking the brow lift as a cue to explain she tells you to close your eyes and wait until she says so.

"Come on, Pinkie. Do I really need to close my eyes?" you ask trying to squeeze out her reasoning.

"Yup, yup! Now do it or you won't find out!"

Sometimes you don't know what to do about this pink pony at certain times and this is one of them.

Obeying her you close your eyes and hear some scurrying amongst the crashing pins and a cheer of a group of ponies. Once the noise stops she informs you to open your eyes.

Cracking open your eyes you can't believe it...

This crazy mare somehow managed to grab your entire equipment for bowling. All seven fingertip bowling balls, your white dot ball, and your bowling ball bags that contain these items.

Taking a kneel to make sure she isn't playing a prank on you, since she tends to do that a lot to you along with her rainbowed assistant, you reach out and unzip one of the compartments on the three ball bag and pull out a pair of bowling shoes. Some Ebonite black shoes. Putting those back you check out another zipper and it reveals some tools you used to use during tournaments when you were younger. Putting those back as well you open one of the two zippers that should contain a ball. Slowly you pull out the ball and feel its greasy surface. You know what ball this is just by touching it. It's your white dot ball, a Columbia 300. You've never cleaned it since you use it as a spare ball. Putting that aside you open the main part of the bag for it to reveal two out of the seven fingertips. One Roto Grip Riot and another Roto Grip product a Defiant.

Not even bothering to check the other two bags you scoot over to Pinkie a hug her with all your might.

This pony pissed you off this morning when you were going to the marketplace to grab some parchment by literally running into you saying that she's late for a meeting with her friends at the bowling alley while helping to round up the loose paper. Now that caught your attention when she said those words so you asked her what bowling alley. She gasped about as loud as she did when you first came here and started saying all this and that on how cool this place was and invited you to come with. So you just started to berate the mare for not telling you earlier about the Alley while meeting up with the four munchkins.

Now this same mare has given you the gift of some homeworld joy within this alien land of ponies.

You did what anyone would do. You bawled your eyes out while whispering 'thank-you's in her ears.

After her apparent shock she hugs you back while rubbing your back soothingly.

After a moment you separate from her and her wonderful smelling mane you clear your eyes and stand back up.

"Pinkie, all is forgiven between me and you, even when you dyed my hair pink."

She chuckles at this and replies.

"It was funny how you looked mad with a pink mane. And your welcome. Come on everypony! Let's get a lane and choose our names!"

Upon finishing that sentence our group cheers and approaches the front counter.