Cupcakes and Nachos

by TheEasterNacho

Rating: teen
Tags: Sad, Original Character, Spike, Tragedy, Derpy Hooves, Pinkie Pie, Twilight Sparkle, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark
Length: 2053

This is my version of Cupcakes when Pinkie Pie gets ahold of me, Nacho...

Well... I have heard so much about the story cupcakes, so i decided to go online and read it, and by the time i was done, i was both disgusted and amazed. I thought 'What if Pinkie got me?' so that is how this fan-fiction came to be. Well, I hope you enjoy!!!

P.S. This is my first fic, so tell me where it could use some work, but go easy kay?
~Nacho

Published 2012-03-27 17:54:03 UTC
Last updated 2012-03-29 18:04:05 UTC

Day 1 in Ponyville

It's such a wonderful day! The sun is glimmering, and illuminating the cloudless sky! I wish this day could last forever! I thought as I glided through the air, every now and then dodging oncoming birds. My orange and red mane was blowing in the wind. My name is Nacho, by the way, and I am an orphan pegasus, and a 13 year old girl. These are the days I wish my parents were here. Then, almost like out of nowhere, another pegasus pony ran into me, throwing off my train of thought. I looked up and saw a grey mare with a blonde mane and tail and a cutie mark that was made up of several bubbles. She was apparently a mail pony with a lazy eye.

"Oh, I appologize. I didn't mean to run into you. Huh, your mail is falling! Let me help you!" I appologized.

"Huh, oh man. I... I'm sorry! You don't have to help me," the mail pony said, "Really, It's fine."

"No, I insist! It was my fault! Here, I'll help you." I replied. I swooped down to grab the bag and those letters that escaped. I flew back up to the mail pony and handed her the saddle bag, after neatly placing the letters into it."Here you go!"

"Thanks! Uh, I gotta deliver these now. Bye, and thank you!"

"Oh, it was nothing! I was glad to help! I appologize about the delay, if it's okay, I could help you deliver those to make up for lost time." I said, smiling.

"Thank you! I'm Derpy Hooves, What is your name?"

"The name's Nacho. Nacho Cheese."

"Wow! I have never heard that name before!" Derpy said, gigling.

"Yeah, it is pretty unique. Hehe."

"Um, after we get done delivering mail, I would really like it if you came with me to see my daughter, Dinky."

"That would be wonderful!"

"Yay!"

"Well, how about we split the mail, and i will deliver half and you can deliver half, then we can meet back here, then we will go see Dinky. Kay?"

"Sounds good! Uh, here." Derpy said, handing me a bundle of letters and a package from her saddle bag.

"Alrighty then! On your marks, get set, GO!" I said, then we both took off, and I noticed that she didn't fly too straight.

I looked at the letter first letter in the stack, and then read the address."Mmmkay," I said before taking to the skies to look for that street. Hmm... There it is! I thought, then i dove towards the street in the address. Once I landed, I started walking through the streetlooking at each mailbox number.Hmm... Twilight Sparkle. Found it! I thought. I dug through the letters to find any that was for her. Turns out, there was two letters and a package for her. I stuck the letters in the mailbox and proceeded to enter the building to deliver the package manually. I knocked on the door with one hoof, and my other arm was around the package, and the bundle of letters was in my mouth. The door opened and I was expecting a pony, but was greeted by a baby dragon. I said "Pkge fr Twrite Spawrkle." I couldn't speak right 'kuz I had a mouth-ful of letters.

"Huh, oh right. TWILIGHT, MAILPONY'S HERE!" the dragon yelled.

I looked up and saw a lavender unicorn, with a purple and pink mane and tail walking towards the doorway, where I was standing. That must be Twilight Sparkle.

"Oh, please come in! Here, let me help you." Twilight Sparkle said, taking the letters motioning me to come in and sit, so I did.
"So, are you a new mailpony? I haven't seen you around here before."

"Um... Actually, I was flying through town when i ran into the mail pony, Derpy, and i made her drop her letters so I am helping her deliver mail. So, yeah. Well, anyways, here's your package, and i stuck your letters in the mailbox." I said.

"Well, how nice! So, you gonna be staying In Ponyville for a while?"

"I don't know."

"Well, you should stay for a few days, I am sure you'd like it. I am Twilight by the way, and this is Spike."

"I'm Nacho."

"Well, Nacho,I hope you enjoy Ponyville! Do you have a place to stay? If not, you can stay here! Oh, yeah here is something to help with the mail," Twilight said, handing me a saddle bag.

"Thank you, but I don't want to take this from you. I appriciate the thought, though."

"Oh, but please, I insist! I have plenty more!" she said, insistantly.

"Thank you," I said, accepting the saddle-bag. "I will bring it back when i am done."

"No, you don't have to. Consider it a welcoming gift!"

"Thanks!" I said, sticking the remaining letters into the bag, then throwing it over my back."Well, I gotta go. These letters won't deliver themselves ya know! Nice to meet you, Twilight! Thanks again for the bag!"

"Bye, Nacho!" she said, as I walked out the door.

Hmm, next letter... I thought, while randomly pulling a letter out of the saddle-bag that was given to me by Twilight.Sweet Apple Acres? I think I saw that on my way into town.I started heading towards the location, only to be greeted by a rather hyper pink mare.

"Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie! You must be new here! What is your name? Do you like parties? I like parties! Oh, Boy! I am gonna throw you one! Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! I'm so excited! Come on over to Sugarcube Corner! I just love it when new ponies come to Ponyville! Come on! Let's go!" she said, without even letting me answer her first question.

"Uh... I, um... I have to get to Sweet Apple Acres."

"Oh! You're Going to see Applejack aren't you! I'll come with you! You can count on me to get you to Applejacks! Let's go! I'm so excited! I haven't seen Applejack in ages! It has been like TWO whole days!"

"Uh... Have you ever considered decaf?" I said to the jumpy pony.

"HA! That is a funny joke! That joke deserves you a free cupcake!" Pinkie Pie said, pulling a cupcake with green icing out of no where. "Here you go!"

"What kind is it?" I replied, looking at the strange smelling cupcakes.

"Avacado!" she replied.

"No thank you, I am deathly allergic to avacados." I said, although it didn't really smell like avacados, more like medicine; I couldn't really put my hoof on the type of medicine.

"Oh," the hyper-active mare said dissapointed. "I better get back and make some more then, but not avacado flavor. First, I have to show you to Applejack's. I can't wait to introduce you to her! Wait, what is your name, and what is your favorite flavor of cupcakes?"

"Nacho, and my favorite flavor of cupcakes is chocolate."

"Cool! Well, do you like parties?" Pinkie Pie said, as we started walking.

"Sorta, I'm not really a big fan of 'em, but I can tolerate." I replied.

"Well, that sounds great! I know you'll just loooove my parties! They're super duper ultra AMAZING!!"

"I guess I could come with you to Sugarcube Corner for a few minutes. Not for to long, though. Gotta deliver the rest of these letters, ya know."

"Okie dokie lokie! We can plan your party there! Ooo! I'm so excited! Like I said, you'll love my parties! Come on!" Pinkie said, grabbing me by the hoof and leading me to a sweets shop.

Me and Pinkie walked into the building and she led me to the kitchen.Hmm... This seems weird, I just met this pony and she wants to throw me a party, and make me some wacky smelling cupcakes. I thought.

"Okay Nacho, close your eyes!" the strange pony said.

"What? Why?" I said, becoming paranoid.

"It's a surprise silly! It's ok!"

I guess she's right. She seems harmless. I'm becoming too paranoid! I thought."Okay. I'll close me eyes."

"I have to make sure you don't peek though, put this on!" she said, putting a blindfold over my eyes, then tying it in the back.

I heard her walking, then I think I heard her pick something up. Then I felt a sharp pain in the back of my head, then, everything went black.

*I am gonna work on this some more, but i ran out of motivation. Tell me what you think so far please. More to come, as soon as i get motivated. BYE!!!!! Now, go comment, then make me a sammich.*

~Nacho

U mad bro?

Punishment

When I woke up, I found myself bound to a table, I couldn't move my arms or legs, or anything for that matter. I said, "Um... Pinkie Pie, where are you? I can't see anything. What's going on?"

"Hi, Nacho! I better take that blindfold off, silly me!" I heard the pink mare say, as she took the blindfold off."There we go!"

I still couldn't move my head to look around, so I said, "W-Where are we? What happened, did I black out?"

"Yeah! Well, only because I hit you in the back of the head with a frying pan! You were out longer than I expected, so I had to give you a shot of adrenaline!" she said, holding an empty syringe in front of my face.

"What? Why?"

"Silly filly! I couldn't have you sleeping at your own Welcome-to-Ponyville party!"

"Huh? What do you mean?" I replied, trying to move around.

"Guess I'll have to release your head restraints so you could see the party I put together!" Pinkie Pie said, removing the matal band around my forhead.

"Uh... Pinkie Pie, w-what is this place?" I said with my eyes wide.

"It's my special party room, you silly filly!"

"I... I don't think I want a party... "

"Of course you do! I mean, you said you can 'tolerate' parties! And plus, I told you my parties are super-duper-ultra-fantastic!"

I was just looking aroung in horror at her sick and twisted party decorations. Pony organs filled with helium, floating around like ballons, intestines hung around ths hellish room like streamers, and I could've sworn I saw a table made from bones! But worst of all, there was what looked like a pony's body with blue fur, a rainbow mane, and severed wings hanging above the body. I screamed at the sight. "Pinkie Pie! W-Why are you doing this? This... .This is no party! This is horrible!"

"Grrr! I worked SO hard to put this together just for you, and what do you repay me by? Insulting my hard work, that's what!" Pinkie replied. "I have to think about a suitable punishment for you! Hmm... I know!"

I saw the pink earth-pony walk over to a table and grab a knife. "This is a perfect punishment!" she said, knife into a fire. Then, after a few minutes of holding it in the fire, she walked over to me and said, "I hope you can see with a knife in your eye!" and almost exactly when she said "eye", she stabbed the burning hot knife into my eyeball, and pulled itout, then stabbed it again, and again, and again; my eye squirting blood all over me and the pony stabbing me. I screamed as he burning hot steel peirced my eyeball over and over again, and all I could see from my left eye was red. Blood red. "That's enough! I guess that eye isn't any good anymore, so I'll just take it out, kay?" Pinkie said, walking over to replace the blood-stained knife with an ice-cream scoop.

"NO!!! PLEASE DON'T!!!" I screamed, then she walked to me and slowly but surely, scooped my eye out, careful not to puncture anymore veins."AGHHHH!!!!! DEAR GOD PLEASE MAKE IT STOP!!!!"

"Oh, Nacho. It's done! I already got out that useless eye!" Pinkie said, waving the dead eye over my good eye, making sure I saw it. "Here! Try it!" She popped the eye in my mouth, then she clamped my mouth shut to make sure I swallowed it, and I did.

"Wh-Why? I d-don't understand." I said, then I blacked out.