Inspired by The League of Humans Acting Villainous

A guy dresses up for an Expo as a character from an original story he and his friend are writing when he buys a pair of bracelets too good to be true from a sketchy booth, next thing he knows his costume is real, he's in Equestria and he's leaking molten metal from his pores! and the cherry on the top of this blunder sundae? both Celestia and Luna are out to gut him like a fish for a little language barrier issue he had over a thousand years ago.

Minor uses of foul language, and Russian words. Translations can be found in the Authors Note at the bottom of every chapter with Russian in it.