"Attention!" I yelled as my clones got into two rows around me. A few spaces were bare as the clones got into formation. "Alright...who's missing?"

Twelve let out a short cough. "Dude, Eleven's staying with a local, Nineteen is off in the jungle somewhere, Nine is fixing the machine thingy and Twenty's-- ''

"Found him!" Another clone yelled as Ten and Twenty were thrown into my view.

"Asshole!" he screamed at the offending clone, taking a few steps forward. "Oh great, you are back, well fuck you too!"

I glared at the rebellious clone as they joined the ranks. "Anyways.... Assignment time! Form single rank and march to me!"

My miniature army snapped into place, the first in line quickly walking up to me. The first stood and saluted. "Two."

I nodded. "Two, maintenance." He nodded and walked off, the next taking his place. "Three, find me as many volunteers from everywhere." the next came. "Four, mess duty. Five, probe bay two. Six, probe bay three. Seven, plumbing."

Six and seven stopped each other. Six stepped back infront of me. "Hey One, bay three is the...the male probing area right?"

I nodded lazily. "You two wanna switch?"

Seven coughed. "Yes...I would...enjoy being there...."

I shrugged and moved them on. "Gay clone you are...unique. Eight, public relations. Ten...." I glared at the somewhat rebellious clone. "Field probing."

Ten cracked a smile and started laughing. "That's it?"

"Yep, go find me some dragons and probe em."

Ten went extremely pale as he lurched off. "I don't...dragons...I'm gonna die...."

"That's the idea, next!" A strange zebra wandered up to me and bowed. "Uh...what is this?"

The zebra undid her hood. "I humbly ask to be allowed my simple task. Clone cum helps create, a powerful concoction for cognitive recollection." She pulled an empty flask out of her bags. "And so here I am to collect said cream, from your most creative clones."

I stared at her before looking around the room. "Anyone get that?"

Eight poked his head back into the hall. "She asked if she can milk some cum, something about a potion or something."

I scratched my chin roughly. "Well...I guess that's okay. Go pick a clone." The zebra bowed and walked off into the ship. The next clone stood in front of me. "Dude Twelve, public relations."

Twelve nodded. "Dude, I'm on it!"

The next person in line stood in front of me. "Uh...hello?" I spoke calmly to the blue maned pony as she bobbed her head. "Can I help you-- wait...Vinyl?" I recognized the mare from Octavia's memories.

"Hey, awesome, you already know me! I'm here to help."

"Oh...uh...you wanna play some music?" I asked as I grabbed the next clone in line. "Vinyl, Thirteen. Thirteen, Vinyl. Now...both of you, moral boosting!"

Thirteen started snickering. "Moral boosting with a mare? I can do that." He picked up the now jubilant mare and stepped out of the line.

The next clone took their place. "Fourteen, find me crystal ponies! Fifteen, find me bat ponies! Sixteen, find me griffons! Seventeen- you're not seventeen." A bright red headed pony stood before me. "So...who are you?"

"Roseluck, I'm living here now." she stepped next to me and turned around. "We're best friends and I live here now."

I scratched my head and stared at her. "Uh...alright. Next!" Seventeen stood in front of me. "Seventeen, security. Eighteen, laundry."

"Oh course...whatever." he grumbled boredly as he wandered off.

At last I could see Twenty, just beyond a mint green unicorn. "Hey...can you move?" I asked as I tried to step past her. She blocked my every step. "Seriously?"

The mare pushed me back and stood on two hooves. "My name is Lyra, you probed my backside, prepare to hug." she snapped forward and wrapped her forelegs around me. "I love you." she started nuzzling my groin as I held my hands off her.

"Oh...how nice...." I lightly pet her head as I stared at Twenty. "So who is this?"

Rose walked in front of my and yanked Lyra off. "Down, he's mine you whorse!"

"Uuuh, what!?" I asked, on the verge of immense laughter. "You do realized there are like...twen--"

"Stay out of this penis, I'll sort this bitch out." Lyra pushed Rose back and lit up her horn. "Bring it slut!"

Rose got into an aggressive pose and started dragging her hoof along the smooth metal floor. "Gonna buck you up, bucking skank!"

I left them to their cat fight while I talked to Twenty. "Twenty, for crimes against...yourself, I sentence you to--" A loud thud interrupted me. "Uh...the fuck was that?"

Twenty just glared at me. "Get on with it jerkoff."

I nodded. "I here by sentence you to--" another loud band cut me off. "Okay...I-- Fuck you ship, stop interrupting me! For crimes against yourself I sentence you to the pit. Have fun shoveling shit." Twelve flipped me off and walked off. "Well, next time just deal with it! It's not like I told anybody about the pig."

"Fuck you--" Twenty was cut off as one of the clones started running up to me.

"One, One, One!" he slid to a stop in front of me and started panting. "There's something coming...something big!"

Everyone froze as the thudding grew louder. A clone was tossed from another room and slid down over to me. "Shit, fucking pissed!" he scrambled to his feet and bolted. The thudding grew extrmely loud as a dim blue cloud floated into the room.

"Moon man!?"

I locked up as I recognized the voice. "Uh...Nightmare...how...how are you?" The blue mist faded as a dark navy mare strolled over to me. "Uh...you're not Nightmare."

Nightmare's imposter did a bow before hooking her foreleg around my back. "I have banished the evil Nightmare Moon, I am once again Princess Luna!" she shouted with a hardy amount of pride. "And you are the Moon man, returned at last!"

I tentatively returned the hug. "Yeah...it's you. Can you let go? I was in the middle of pun--" I was cut off as Luna yanked me by the neck.

"Is Phileas still here?"

I tried to pry her off my neck. "The fuc-king stuffed dolphin!?"

Luna tightened her grip around my neck, nuzzling close as she pranced in a circle. "Is he still here!?"

"Luna put me down, he's in my quarters, just let me go and--" I was cut off once again as Luna started giggling.

"Come along Moon Man, we shall enjoy an evening of coitus and cuddle with Phileas."

I grabbed at everything I could as Luna pulled me along with her magic. "Fucking- no- no no no no fuck!" I screamed as I managed to grab onto two things, one in each hand. I pulled the hairy objects along as I was dragged away.

"Hey no no!" Rose's voice broke the dragging sound.

"Wait, wait, just wait, just stop! Let go!" Lyra screamed as I opened my eyes, finding a pony tail in each hand.

"I'm not doing this alone! Last time I tried that she nearly broke my pelvis!" I yelled as I tightened my grip on the ponies' tails. "Not--going--alone!"

The mares continued to piss and moan as they tried to dig their hooves into the metal floor.

Author's Note

Sorry. I'm supposed to be on break but I can't fucking stop writing.

But that also means the chapters will be shorter. So...expect shorter chapters for a while.