1- Boredom Nigh, Anything to Stir Things Up
He had been of the highest of youthful states.
Bored out of his friggin mind. So he traipsed around the house, desperate for something to take his mind off his boredom.
“Mooooooooooooom! Theres NOTHING to dooooooo!” he called to his mother, who was currently deep in work, writing an article for the Galloping Gazette, a local Canterlot newspaper publication.
”Busy...“ she muttered angrily around the pencil clenched tightly in her mouth, not even stopping to take her eyes off the offending half finished page before her.
He shrugged his withers, knowing that his mother had barely heard him as is, and would only grow aggravated if he pressed the issue any further. He walked back to his room, his hooves making a wooden clop that reverberated around the hallway. He stopped suddenly, his eye being caught by a glint of sunlight off of metal.
The light was coming through a window set into the hallway at about neck height, reflecting off of a picture frame on the opposite wall, recalling a family reunion long past.
The flicker of light continued upwards, until it landed on the hanging circlet, attached to a trapdoor set into the ceiling.
THE ATTIC!
Mom was always telling him to stay out of the attic, that there were a lot of very old, very breakable items that they were keeping for some reason or other (some he knew had been handed down from his grandfather, and others he knew were junk from seeing his father levitate a treadmill -he had used it once and never again- directly into the attic, claiming it “a waste of valuable space”)
”Allright,” he said, looking upwards at the door, “I’m gonna get up there...but how?” He looked upwards, the door tantalizingly out of reach. He looked around, but there wasn’t anything he could use as a hoofstool, even a heavily improvised one.
”Horse feathers!” he exclaimed ”...once again, genetics returns to personally mock me...”
Being the offspring of a pegasus and a unicorn, he had always thought it odd that he had been born an earth pony, and had found constant reminders of the fact. In his everyday life, the pegasi were always faster, they always won any race themed or running challenge that came up. And forget any game that required fine motor skills, the unicorns always had an unfair advantage in those games.
He walked slowly down the hallway, wracking his brain for an idea. He stopped suddenly, a reckless plan fresh in the forefront of his mind. Turning around, he lowered his head, slightly scuffing the floor, steadying himself with the intent of charging down the hall, jumping, bouncing off a wall, and grabbing the ring with his teeth.
”DON’T YOU DARE!!!”
He did a half go-stop, landing with his rump high up in the air and his front legs trapped under the weight of his torso, his face half pushed into the floor by his poorly halted momentum.
”Aaaargh, Mooooooom, what the heck?” he nearly yelled, slowly disentangling his limbs and righting himself.
”Don’t you DARE take that tone with me, I told you once, I’ll tell you again, STAY. OUT. OF THE ATTIC,” her voice dipped to a low growl while simultaneously managing to enunciate each word at the end, sending chills down his back while his imagination churned out horrifying punishments she might have inflicted had she come upon him dangling from the trapdoor. ”Seriously Ecks, what am I supposed to do with you? I cant have you noisily trotting through the house when I’m on a deadline, you KNOW this!” She exclaimed, pointing a wing towards the window. ”Why don’t you go outside, run around, burn off that energy of yours?”
”I don’t want to go outside, there's nothing to DO around here,” he whined.
”Well I have work to do, so outside,” she stated, dramatically pointing with both her right wing and foreleg out the window, “Or I swear, I am going to get VERY. UGLY.”
She didn’t have say it twice, a clattering of his hooves and the sound of the front door slamming shut marking the beginning of a quiet afternoon in which to reach her deadline.
”Seriously, that darn colt is going to give me a heart attack one of these days...” she said, walking back to the table in the living room, plopping down again at her half finished paper.
”...AAAAAARRGHHH, WHAT THE HECK ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO WRITE ABOUT MIGRATION PATTERNS? THEY GO NORTH, THEY GO SOUTH!!!” With this she crumpled the page into a ball, deftly tossing it into a bag lined pail behind her without looking. ”Allright...It is the conclusion, therefore, that the flocks of...“
He had avoided a major hassle. His mom was in one of her moods, and nothing short of another changeling invasion would distract her.
He sat on the porch, loathe to submit to his enforced exile from his house.
"Seriously Ecks, what am I supposed to do with you?" he mimicked, hitting the pitch and intonation perfectly. He could have copied his mothers voice exactly, as was his special talent (his Cutie mark was that of a parrot, of which it was constantly getting him folks asking if he liked birds or something like that), but he got a more perverse pleasure in the 'straight up mock'.
"Ey, Echo!" Trotting down the street towards him was one of his colt friends, an amiable unicorn named Rising Crest. His special talent was the manipulation of water molecules, which apparently was an 'unimpressive talent at best' which got him a lot of flak from the neighborhood kids. Seriously, those goat foals were MEAN.
"Hey Rise, what're you up to?" he said, copying his friends voice. He mainly copied to piss other ponies off, but in his tightly knit group of friends, most of them found it hilarious to watch an adults face slowly devolve into confusion at hearing the same voice come from opposite sides of the room.
"I'm on my way to give Penny Whistle her homework," Rising Crest stated, pointing to his saddlebags."Miss Tack also gave me some remedial stuff too..." With this, he glanced sheepishly at the ground, knowing that Echo had already completed all the "home work" for the next week. He tended to take a months work and cram it into a single night, much to the chagrin of Miss Tack.
"Mind if I tag along? Mom's out on the warpath today, if I so much as step a hoof back inside, I think it and I will get thrown out separately."
"No fur off my back, I'll tell you that. Plus, you know her dad likes you better than me anyway, if you're there it'll cut down on," with this, he stopped talking, screwing his face up into mock horror, "THE LOOOOOK" He drawled these last two words out, eliciting a knowing grin from Echo.
Penny Whistle and Rising Crest may have been going steady for nigh on over three years, but her father Tin Whistle just never seemed to warm up to the fact. In fact, it seemed for a time that he had expected Penny and Echo to start 'seeing each other'. Penny was nice, but she was just his friend, nothing more.
"And then he says, I DIDN'T EVEN SEE HER!" With this they both broke out laughing. It was a bit of a trek to Penny Whistles house, so they had chosen to recant old jokes and stories for the way over. Rising always preferred hearing Echo do the stories, as he could mimic the voice of the character and bring life into the simple retelling. Echo preferred when Rising told jokes, always finding a way to twist the punchline or the delivery into something new.
"So..." Echo stated, their destination having been reached, a simple house set alongside two others that for all purposes appeared identical in color, design, and shape. The only tangible difference that could be seen was the house number tagged in white paint in front of each house upon the road. "52117...you know, if her dad REALLY wanted to keep you away, he'd just remove all the numbers on the street," Echo teased.
"Goodness, why don't you say it louder, give him yet more ways to mess with me?" Rising Crest asked, a slight sour grin alighting on his face. "After the whole 'silent treatment' debacle I cant help shake the feeling that he's just waiting, biding his time till he comes up with something really big."
It had happened several months prior, Tin Whistle had simply decided to 'ignore' Rising Crest. Much to the displeasure to his daughter. It had all been ended with Penny Whistle yelling at her dad until he agreed to 'knock it off'. All in all, an exciting couple of weeks. Not one of the worst things he'd done over the years, but not the least horrible either.
"Psssssssssssssst" a hissing sound came from the top left window, connected to Penny Whistle's room. Leaning out was Penny Whistle, a cute little pegasus filly with a headful of yellow mane and a coat of deep tinged orange. "Guys, gimmie a minute, wait there, I'll be right there thank you-" with this she ducked back inside, pulling the window closed with a sharp snap.
"...she seems excited." Echo stated, slightly amused by Penny Whistle's tendency to cram as many words as she could in any given sentence. And breath. In fact, he was pretty sure that if she never had to breathe, she'd never stop talking.
"Dude, did you seriously forget?" Rising Crest asked incredulously, staring at Echo with wide eyes, a confused look stamped across his muzzle.
"Ummm...noooo, never...Hypothetically, if I did-" Echo's query was cut off by a loud groan from Rising Crest, who had lifted his forehoof and was rubbing his temple in irritation.
"I reminded you TWO days ago Echo, two days ago!"
"...Yeah I got nuthin."
With a slight glare to counter his friends amused glance, Rising Crest finally sighed in resignation. "Its our anniversary? Three years? Been planning this for months?"
Echo smiled, an impish grin growing on his face. "Oh ho ho! Mister 'I'm just bringing her her homework', eh? Had me going for a while, thought it was odd for you to show such interest in homework..." he trailed off as Rising Crest rolled his eyes, then focused them on the figure hurriedly walking down the driveway. Penny Whistle had foregone the option of clothing, leaving her cutie mark of some sort of flute visible. She had however, done up her mane in a ponytail.
"Come one, lets go, come on come on come on!" she hissed at them, quickly walking past them and down the road. With an amused glance between them, Echo and Rising Crest followed at a swift trot.
"So we can't go to dinner tonight. Dad found out and I heard him tell mom that he's gonna crash it so we could maybe go to a different place altogether but I'd rather just wait and go to the Tomato Garden some other time since we already planned on going there oh hey Echo why are you here?" Looking back and forth between Rising Crest and Echo, she splayed her ears back with a grimace. "You forgot, didn't you."
"Why does everypony just ASSUME I forgot? I have a good memory, I remember tons of stuff, loads better than you and Crest..." Echo trailed off, seemingly trying to focus his entire undivided attention at a cloud lazily floating above.
Penny Whistle giggled, leaning into Rising Crests side. "Well, lucky for you we have some time to kill now. Wanna hang?" With a glance towards Echo -who had still been embarrassingly examining the floating cloud at this point-, she craned her head forward and nuzzled Rising Crest. Such an action was quickly returned with a giggle of Rising Crests own.
Now, Echo loved his two friends, in the same way he loved his family. But at certain points in his life he couldn't help but feel like the fifth hoof in thier relationship. At least they were young, thinking on it he was sure the pda (pony displays of affection) was just going to get worse as they got older. What if they went and actually got married? Gah, they'd be perfectly insufferable.
"Sure, how bout we head over to Crests?"
"Thats a no go. My dads holding a poker game while my moms over in Hoofington. Unless you want to inhale an entire islands worth of cigar smoke, that is." Rising Crst wrinkled up his muzzle in disgust, he was unsure as to why his father and his friends liked such a horrid activity. The scent clung to the walls of his fathers office, making it a place he tried to avoid. At least he'd get a tongue lashing when Rising Crests mother returned.
"Maybe we could go to the cinema? We haven't checked in a while they might have a new one in by now whaddaya think?" Penny Whistle asked.
"Nope, its still the same one they've had for the past six months. I was over near there with my mom the other day." Echo stated with a huff. It wasn't really the cinema's fault. Making movies was a long, arduous process. He'd even heard that the one currently in had taken over ten years to make. They didn't really rake in that much money, either. Why 'damage' your eyes by sitting in a seat staring at a large screen in the dark for just under an hour, when you could be outside? Because it was a good time waster, that's why.
"I've already seen it 3 times already, don't know about you but I'm fairly certain I could quote it by now." Echo said with a smirk.
Penny Whistle laughed, a derisive snort that stuck in her nostrils. "Took you three whole viewings? Someponys losing their touch~."
"What about your place Echo?" Rising Crest asked.
"Did you already forget about my mom? And here you were ribbing me in MY memory..."
"Actually I was just thinking about her. Isn't that her running this way?"
Echo rubbernecked in the direction that Rising Crest pointed, his eyes bugging out as they locked onto the form of his mother trotting towards them. Her mane was a wind blown mass, she had most likely flown around for a bit before that point. She had on a large pair of saddlebags, stuffed to the brim with paper.
"Echo! Glad I caught you. Look, I'm taking my draft over to the editor, I'll be back home late, don't wait up all right?" She rattled this off in a fast stream of words, and Echo could see the beginnings of a twitch forming from her left eye.
"...why didn't you just leave a note?"
Echo's mother stared at him for a moment, trying to come up with an answer. True, she had been working hard as of late but that shouldn't have made her overlook something THAT simple. "No time, give your dad a kiss from me love you!" With that and a quick peck on her sons forehead, she flapped her wings and took off.
"She....guh. Looks like forgetting stuffs going around. Dads over in Manehatton for the magic conference." Echo let out a disappointed sigh. His mothers cooking wasn't the best, but it was still a sight better than anything he could whip up. "Looks like I'll be dining on the regal, majestic feast of a simple salad tonight. Well, at the very least we now got the house to ourselves." with a sudden smile and a wicked grin, he turned to his friends, "And I know just what we can do..."
"You have an attic?" Rising Crest asked, lighting up his horn and illuminating the seemingly cavernous space. He then made the mistake of breathing in too deeply, causing him to have a sneezing fit and fall back down the collapsible ladder. Thankfully he had two soft bodies to break his fall.
"Sweet Celestia what have you been eating?" Echo drawled, finding his face pressed to the floor twice in the same day.
"As comfy as this is, I have to agree that you are kinda heavy maybe you should go on a diet or something?" Penny whistle joked with a laugh, wriggling out from the pile and dusting herself off. They checked each other for any injuries, thankfully the only thing damaged appeared to be Rising Crests pride. With a flap of her wings, Penny Whistle rose off the ground and poked her head into the horizontal door. "Oooooooooh~ Cresty, you gotta see this, its like a museum up here!" She pulled herself in, and was quickly lost from sight.
"Well than, 'Cresty'?" Echo asked, contorting his vocal cords to match Penny Whistles voice. "Age before beauty!" Echo gestured up the ladder.
"Goodness that's creepy, I thought you said you were going to stop that." Rising Crest reached down after making it to the top, helping Echo make it the rest of the way up.
"Stop what?" Penny Whistle asked, leaning over a tipped over mirror. She had found a wide selection of costume jewelry, having adorned herself with what looked like about five pounds of plastic gems, necklaces and even a large impressive looking crown.
Rising Crest and Echo looked at her in confusion and amusement, before Rising Crest broke the silence. "And who are you supposed to be, Princess Sparkles?"
With a twirl, she declared with an exaggerated prissy sounding accent," Ah ahm Queen Elizabit, The thiiiiiird!~"
"Ummm... Prance?" Echo asked. His history had always been something he struggled over.
"No, its.. forget it, you'll just forget it in a minute anyway ooh Cresty whatcha got there?"
Echo looked over at Rising Crest, who had been digging in a pile of various nicknacks. He stifled a laugh as he saw what was perched on his head.
"Hey, don't knock old Romane armor, this stuff looks awesome." Rising Crest had what looked like an old legionaires helmet on, his mane slotted out through the top like a mohawk. "I think there's a whole set here, gimmie a minute." He turned back to the pile, pulling out random articles of armor, none of it looking in particularly good condition.
"Apparently, we're playing dress up now. Give me a minute, and I'll find an outfit to blow both yours outta the water." Echo claimed with a laugh, and then triapsed deep into the mess that was the contents of the attic. Looking round he saw his parents had apparently collected one of everything. A huge dresser stained with age. A large barrel filled with fake plant leaves. A pile of what looked like failed sewing projects. Oh hey, the treadmill. Finally, Echo saw something that caught his eye. It was a simple, yet ornate chest.
It was a plain midsized wooden chest, with delicate looking horseshoes engraved on both the ends. What truly caught his eye, was engraved onto the front of the box. It was the profile of a parrot, seemingly identical to his own cutie mark. He dragged it out of the pile of random junk, and heaved it up on a nearby suitcase. Cracking the top open, he was momentarily disappointed by what he saw inside. A pink wooden mane brush, carved to look like a shooting star was sitting on top of what looked like a plain blanket. Placing the brush to the side, and was pleasantly surprised when he discovered the "blanket" to actually be a carefully crafted robe of deepest arcanists blue. He quickly pulled it over his head, "Sweet, now I just gotta find a 'magic' staff and my disguise shall be complete!" A glint of light caught his eye, and he saw that hidden under the robe were what looked like four golden hoof sheathes. The golden metal was crafted so that it would rise up from the tip of the hoof. Pulling them all out, Echo poked and prodded the bottom of the chest to see if there was any more hidden goodies to be had. Finding nothing more, Echo careful studied the four golden horseshoe covers before coming to a decision.
"Battle mage!"
Echo came trundling back to the others, a fake beard held on with string causing most of their mirth at the sight of him. He had found a wooden hoofinstick that he used as a 'magic staff", and alighted on his head was a green pointy cowl. Most surprisingly he had somehow managed to tape a wooden bit of junk to his forehead, making a makeshift horn.
"I am the Illustrious battle mage, Orion of the Belt!" he exclaimed, raising the "staff" above his head. This in turn caused both Rising Crest and Penny Whistle to fall to the floor, laughing their flanks off.
"More like the grimy janitor of a thrift store, where the hay did you even find a hat like that?" Rising Crest laughed, pulling himself off of the floor and wiping a tear from his eye. He had since Echo had gone, assembled an entire set of armor, which was obviously made for somepony much larger than his self. It hung off of him, making him look like a little foal. Penny Whistle had also augmented her outfit since Echo had been gone, adding a saddle of purple velvet that had what looked like it had actual diamonds and pearls strung on it.
"It was in a box labeled 'books'. Wanna guess what wasn't in there?" He leaned closer, placing a hoof alongside his muzzle and dipping down to a loud stage whisper.
"Ooooh, pretty horseshoes where'd you find them can I try them on?" Penny rattled off, leaning closer and trying to pry the item in question off of Echo's hoof.
"I found them in a box and- AGH! pull on the horshoe, not my hoof, ow!" Echo retrieved his hoof, and set off to remove the horseshoes with less bone crushing force than his friend had managed. Finding it stuck harder than he had thought, he brought his hoof up to his mouth and clamped his teeth down on the offending horseshoe.
"Ewww, slobber..." Penny Whistle said, sticking out a tongue in disgust.
After several minutes, Echo had to come to a horrifying conclusion.
He couldn't get them off.
Author's Note
Yeah, anyone reading my other stories are gonna be pissed that I've spent my time on yet another story without first giving them an update on what I've already started. For those people, I'm sorry, I'm working on them. For everyone else that hasnt read any of my other stuff, then I hope you enjoy this, leave a comment if you feel like it.
2- Belay That! I'll Do It Myself
"Why you wearing boots, dweeb?"
Echo took a long, hard look at the pony perched on the edge of his desk. A slim, red coated unicorn with blasts of red going through his dark red mane and tail.
Ali O. C.
Alihondro, O'Cloud. In other words, one of the biggest morons in the whole of class C, if not the entire school.
"I asked you a question, Pecko."
It was Ali's chosen insult for Echo. It didn't even make sense! All he did was change it slightly by adding a 'p' on the front, and he used it ALL the time. As if it was actually insulting him.
"Forgot how to say my name again, Ali? It's Echo, no 'p' sound included. Just try saying it to yourself a few times, maybe you'll actually remember it this time. And the boots? Mom said they might be making it rain earlier than expected, so I should at the very least take my booties," he lied, shaking his head as if to untangle some sort of mental cobweb.
"Ha! Little mama's colt, can't even go to school without dragging along on her apron strings." Ali goaded.
"First off, my mom NEVER wears an apron, so that kinda fell flat. Secondly, I know for a FACT the first thing you said when you fell off the dumpster last week trying to impress those seniors was 'Mama'. So you aren't exactly in a position to use that kind of ammo."
A resounding chorus of laughter struck up from the watchers of this little spat, causing Ali to stalk off to his own seat with a barely controlled anger.
Echo adjusted another pencil on his desk, raising his head as a familiar face came through the classroom door. "Oy! Crest. I found your book hidden under the bushes in the garden." A single look towards Ail was enough to confirm his barely contained mirth, "Can't imagine how it ended up there."
"Yeah," Rising Crest started, igniting his horn and causing a cover of sleet to form on Ali's suddenly cold head, "Can't imagine how that happened. Not in the slightest."
"Ms. Tack!" Ali belted out, drawing the tired looking mares attention. "Rising Crest just attacked me!" A bored look at the frost camped out on Ali's head, and Ms. Tack turned towards Rising Crest with a scowl.
"Detention, Mr. Crest. Fighting is not allowed on school property."
"Yes Ms. Tack," Rising Crest sullenly replied.
"Come now students, calm yourselves, everypony settle down!" Ms. Tack called out.
Once everypony had taken their seats, she started class and everything proceeded as normal. Until the test.
Echo was prepared for something as simple as a math test, but he could definitely see some of his classmates looking a bit worried.
Ali looked particularly peeved, it was obvious he hadn't done ANY studying. five minutes in, and he hadn't even written his name down yet.
That dumbass Pecko thinks he's so smart? Echo heard Ali say.
Wait... how come Ms. Tack didn't call him on that? It wasn't like he was being quiet...
Who in Tartarus would even NEED this in real life? Maybe a dweeb like Pecko would use it in his dweeb life, but someone as awesome as me shouldn't have to deal with this bull manure!
Echo stared at the back of Ali's head, wondering how no one else heard his antagonistic rambling. He had even ended on an expletive, there's no way Ms. Tack wouldn't have said something about that.
X divided by five under seven? It's not even numbers anymore, buck this garbage!
Yeah, there was no way she didn't hear that. What the hay was going on?
I wonder is Basketcase is gonna be free later to play some hoofball?
Echo realized with a start, Ali wasn't saying anything outloud. He was hearing his thoughts!
How? Echo couldn't fathom how this came to pass. There was no way this should have been possible, but regardless that didn't stop Ali from mindlessly rambling on and on and on in his idiotic way.
Echo covered his ears, but it did nothing to help. It didn't deafen it at all, and he NEVER. SHUT. UP.
"Something the matter?" Ms. Tack asked, peering over the edge of her hornrim glasses.
"I..." Echo tried desperately to think up an excuse. "I have a bit of a headache, I've finished my test, can I go to the nurses office?"
She gave a slow nod, and returned her attention to her papers.
Echo wandered the halls, heading for the nurses office. His head didn't really hurt, but it was swimming. He didn't really know of any mind reading spells, but what else could this be? You didn't just wake up one morning with the mutant ability of telepathy, life wasn't like a comic book.
"Something wrong, deary?" The nurse asked as Echo entered the room.
"I... just had a bit of a headache," Echo lied.
Probably lying, but the poor dear does look rather ashen, Echo heard her 'say'.
"Well, just take a short rest on one of the beds, and I hope you feel better soon."
Echo lay down, trying to collect his thoughts.
Seventeen down... another word for a bale of hay... I'll come back to that later. Fourteen across, Princess Celestia's favorite flavor of cake... crabapples, I know this one! Meringue? No, that's too long...
She continued on and on like this incessantly, not even pausing to take a breath. Seeing as Echo was apparently hearing her internal thoughts, it wasn't that big of a surprise.
Echo tried to 'turn off' the mind read-yness, to no avail. He shut his eyes in concentration, he tried to think of something else, ANYTHING else, unsuccessfully. Not even a mantra of 'my mind is my own, my mind is my own, my mind is my own,' did anything of note.
Echo finally fell into a restless sleep, the nurses ramblings continuing on into obscurity.
I wonder if raspberry would fit there?
3- Alls Well That Ends Wel-Wait, This Is Only The Third Chapter
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3- Alls Well That Ends Wel-Wait, This Is Only The Third Chapter
"Silly foals, the lot of them. If they'd just let me take control of the project we'd be making a profit by the end of the-"
"Oh Celestia, I'm never going to fit into my dress by the end of the week! Just had to go get a Hayburger, couldn't very well just abide by my diet, oh gosh Try Pod is gonna think I'm a slob! I'll just have each night from here on to the end of the week be diet AND work-"
"Them gosh darned nutters are protesting again? About what? The guard already chased out them shifty eyes zebras, what more could a pony want? Why, back in my day-"
"And then mommy yelled at me! It's not fair! I put it in Wrestles toybox, he should have gotten in trouble for it! How did mommy even know? Could she... wait, mommy said all mommys have eyes in the back of their heads... what if-"
"Shoo-bee-doo, shoop soop bee doo~ Wait... dagnabbit, crabapples, how did the rest of the song go?"
After Echo had woken up in the nurses office, he had once more been privy to the no longer private thoughts of the elderly mare. Deciding that this would be a rather annoying way to waste his time, he instead left school early. Would probably get into trouble with his mom for that, but at the moment anything was preferable to listening to the nurses meandering thoughts regarding how much baking soda should be added to whatever dish it had been that she was thinking about.
You'd think that a lady who basically hung out around a schoolful of rambunctious kids would have more exciting thoughts than baking.
Echo didn't want to worry his friends, but he wanted even less to have to sit there as he listened to every errant thought that passed through their heads. It wasn't that he feared it, just that he wanted to either figure out what the hay was going on before he presented his problem to his friends. First find some basic information, then his friends could help him extrapolate on that, then maybe his mom wouldn't ground him.
Who was he kidding? He couldn't get the stupid horseshoes off, his mom would know immediately that he had been up in the attic, right after she had told him not to go up there. He'd be lucky to leave his room by the time he hit forty. If even then. He'd probably be cleaning the floors for the next twenty years alone if she found out, if only he could get these stupid horseshoes off...
"Paper... paper stock? What the heck does a coated stock have to do with anything? Cream, white, ivory? They all look the blasted same! Vellum bristol? What the hays a bristol? Agh, why was 'I' saddled with run, it's Reg-"
Wait, the horseshoes. First they wouldn't come off, then this stupid mind reading power is left on him like a pegasus dumping packages from on high? Well, at least it wasn't anything as weighty as a piano. Physically, at least. Echo definitely felt as if a burden heavier than a piano was currently resting on his brow. Who would actually want to hear the thoughts of everypony else? They'd probably just keep thinking about boring stuff, or the weird stuff-
"And then once he gets home, then he'll... heeeee~ with the hoofcuffs, and the extra slick... oooh, mamas been needing a personal night. One year of barely any sleep, then four more right after that with barely a single moment of privacy... oooh, overnight sleepovers with new friends are Celestias gift to poor overworked mares like myself. Hope Air Brau can still find an old girl like me attractive... Oh well, I have just the outfit that'll get his goat-"
UGH! NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.
THAT was one of the worst things about being able to read other ponies minds. It wasn't like Echo had a choice of WHO his power chose to funnel directly into his head, besides the fact that it seemed SLIGHTLY based off of who was nearest to him at any point. If the mare who looked about as old as his mom giggling away like a filly was any indication. Once she noticed Echos questioning gaze, she quickly turned a bright shade of crimson and crossed the street.
So... was there anyway to at the very least CHOOSE who he listened in on? At the very least the ability to change the proverbial radio channel would be very useful at this point in time. Listening in to the newest intruder of his mental space, Echo was relieved to find the stallion -who, if he was correct, was the rather tired looking guy walking on about twenty hoof spans in front of him- was only interested in reminiscing over the weekends hoofball game between the East Pens and the West School Crunchers. Close game, the Crunchers had of course been cheating up a storm but the referee had either taken a bribe or a whole bottle of stupid pills.
Echo mused on that. Was there an actual thing as stupid pills? If there was,how did they work, and where did somepony go to get them? It wasn't like he himself would use them, but if somepony like Ali found a couple in his lunch... Wait, no, that wouldn't work. He was already as dumb as a brick, the only pill that could possibly make him even stupider would have to be one of those 'suppositrys' he heard dad talking about one time. Too big to swallow he said, so they had to be REALLY big. Wait, if they were too big to swallow, then how DID you get it in?
"This stupid thing has to be broken. Stupid R&D dumbasses. You'd think a gaggle of mules that work on nothing else BESIDES tech would be able to make something that wouldn't fritz out the second I step a single hoof outta the building. The hay am I looking for anyway? If there really was an alicorn level artifact spraying magic like a firehose out in the city, somepony would have seen it or something. It's not like it could be outputting this much juice and not be noticeable by ANYPONY, right? What the... now it's going the other way? Dang, I feel like such a creep, wandering around with this stupidly oversized can opener. Now it's going left... Oh son of a... It's making me follow a colt in goofy rainboots! It's not even cold out, stupid little bugger... Welp, congratulations Derby, your gadget is worth only as much as the tin you used for the casing-"
Echo turned back, looking at the stallion that had passed him a while back. He had since decided to retrace his steps, following behind Echo at about ten to twenty hoof paces. At being noticed, the stallion gave him a weak grin, followed by giving the device in his hoof -a blocky case of metal that connected to a backpack he wore via a tangled cable- a couple smacks as he continued to grumble under his breath.
"Great, now I KNOW I look like a creeper. When I get my hooves on you Derby, Imma wring yer scrawny neck.
"What're you lookin' at, huh?" the stallion ground out, fixing Echo with a stink eye as he tucked the device in his hoof under his belt.
"Nothing," Echo hurriedly belted out, hightailing his way down a side alley. He heard the stallion call out a cut off expletive, thankfully not following as Echo made his escape. He kept to the backroads, occasionally hearing the passing thoughts of an overhead pegasi. Darned bird ponies, couldn't keep their hooves on the ground and their thoughts out of his head. And pretty much each and every single one of them was thinking about flying, which was -if even possible- more annoying than just the random street chatter. Mind chatter. Matter? No. Mindatter? Good golly no. Uhhh... whatever. He'd come up with an appropriate term later.
But seriously, how much fun can flying actually be? It was basically just walking, but in the air. Or, running. Sorta. Without your legs. Much less safe than actually walking around on the ground. Not that any pegasi would ever admit that. They just such a silly fascination with being off the ground.
'I mean really,' Echo thought to himself, 'whats the appeal? You float around off the ground and then your legs get all flabby. If I ever wanted to get the same feeling I'd just get a running start and take a running jump.'
Echo stomped a hoof on the ground in satisfaction, his mental point making sense to him at the moment. Well, that is to say he tried to stomp a hoof on the ground.
"Woah, almost stepped in a hole," Echo mumbled looking down at the ground beneath him. "That would've been ba...aaaaaaaaaa-" And then continued to look down. And further still.
The ground stretched out beneath his hooves, several hoof spans from actually touching.
"AGH!" he yelped, flinching upwards and unconsciously tucking his legs up under his barrel. "What the- WAIT. NO. All you did was mind reading!" Echo protested, holding up a bootie covered hoof to complain directly at one of the horseshoes. "Put me down put me down put me down put me down!"
With a thump, Echo landed square on his rump, a pained groan escaping him before he quickly whipped his head around to see if anypony had seen him screeching like a kicked pig.
"This is just getting dumb," Echo grumbled, holding out a hoof to inspect it before he noticed something important. Important to him, anyway. "I... I'm not hearing thoughts anymore?" he mused, a moment of panic interspersed as he started floating a hoof above the ground, falling back with a softer thump than before. "Stop doing that!"
This wasn't good. If he couldn't control the mind reading, then how in Tartarus would he be able to control a floating power? He didn't know the first thing about flying! And what if he didn't come back down? Like, he just kept going and going, would he ever come back down? Maybe against all else he could grab onto a star and jump back down. And then crash into the ground and go to the hospital. He'd heard the stories about foolish pegasi that didn't brake in time, managed to break bones and worse. And Echo didn't even have wings with which to brake! At least he didn't have wings to break...
A harrowing half hour later found himself home, a broken bundle of frayed nerves and close calls. If that haystack hadn't been there... well he'd never question the validity of surviving a four story drop into a bale of hay again, that was for sure. A quick tug, and the door was closed. A ceiling above him, a floor less than fatal falling distance below him. He'd probably have to tie himself into bed until this stupid power decided to turn itself off like the other one had, but all things considered, it was good to be home.
"ECHO DA CAPO, WHAT DID YOU DO???"
Echo cringed into fetal position, slowly bobbing at about head height. At his mothers head height, which was reeeeaaally bad seeing as she had apparently gotten home before he had... She didn't even look surprised that her ground bound son was disobeying the law which all earth ponies held to a religious degree, that of gravity. She just was looking straight at him, eyes unblinking as she held a disapproving glare.
"Uh... I can explain everything?"
Author's Note
Happy Birthday to me, here's a present for all of you!
Hope you all enjoy the short chapter, I'd like to take the time to shamelessly plug my other stories, which also have a new chapter today!~
These are URL links
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The Mechromancer; To Build The Best
Sword In The Stone: Courage To Be King
Cout De Jumanji
Applegate
Ready Player One
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Those were URL links
Veneficus asks;Update 'Please? pretty please? with cherry on top?'
I know that saying from 'somewhere', but it fits here perfectly.
But really, please finish this story.
Sorry for the wait buddy, here's something to tide you over...
And as always, please leave a comment or question for a character of your choice! I'll be sure to make 'em respond, so long as you post it.
