Diamond Rizzle

by Mattricole

Rating: teen
Tags: Romance, Random, Diamond Tiara, Apple Bloom, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Snips
Length: 1105

Diamond Tiara decides to be a gangsta. Or does she?

After listening to an amazing CD, Diamond Tiara decides to become a gangsta just like her idols.

Or does she?

Published 2014-03-06 19:30:02 UTC
Last updated 2014-03-06 19:30:02 UTC

The One and Only

“Ugh, Silver Spoon, this music store sucks! Can’t we go somewhere else?” Diamond Tiara said as she glared at the country music section. I bet Apple Bloom would have a field day in here.

“Oh come on, Diamond Tiara, it’s not that bad!” Silver Spoon yelled. She was looking through the classical section, picking up songs from various famous groups. “How can you not enjoy music? There has to be at least one CD you can enjoy.”

“Doubtful,” Diamond Tiara muttered. She continued walking throughout the store, occasionally picking up headphones hooked up to stereo’s to check out the music, only to gag in disgust. “Ugh, these songs are utterly dreadful!”

After a few more minutes of walking around she came across another stereo, this one with a poster of three zebras, dressed in baggy clothing and gold covering their teeth.

“What the heck is this?” Diamond Tiara asked herself. She picked up the headphones and brought it to her ears, gasping as she heard the second most beautiful voice she ever heard.

Yo! The name’s Big T, I got no time!

To make a special cake fo’ your tea lime!

Gonna take my hoof and polish it up!

Right before I pick up my cup!

I drink my tea, no slurping allowed!

As I look to the sky for one big cloud!

“Th-this is the most amazing thing I’ve ever heard,” Diamond Tiara muttered, dropping the headphones and quickly picking up a CD. She quickly rushed over to the cashier and placed the CD on the counter. “Hurry up and let me buy this!”

“Uh...okay?” the clerk muttered, putting his magazine up. He slowly picked up and the CD, when he noticed what the band was and gave Diamond Tiara a questionable glance. “Uh, you sure you want this CD? These guys are kinda-”

“Awesome?! I know!” Diamond Tiara gushed as she threw down her bits and quickly ran off with her CD.

“Wow, and ponies think I have bad taste in music,” he muttered as he picked his magazine back up and continued reading it.

“This is the most amazing thing ever,” Diamond Tiara muttered, tears spilling from her eyes as she listened to the soothing sounds of her brand new rap album. She had holed herself inside her room for for the entire weekend, doing nothing but listening to her album.

The lyrics touched her heart in ways that she couldn’t imagine. It was as if the zebras were speaking from the soul, directly speaking to all those who would be willing to listen. How they came up with such great lyrics like:

Eating cookie dough in my bed!

Gives me time to think with my head!

It truly was beautiful. Such intellect despite their mannerisms! She too often ate cookie dough in bed, and it was truly delicious, and helped her with thinking!

But that was nothing compared to one of her favorite lines, such as:

I’ve been thinking about getting house,

But I can’t afford it, cause I bought a blouse!

All ya’ll haters laugh at me,

Better stop or I’ll throw some tea!

Truly a riveting tale in her opinion. They were truly amazing. They didn’t care what others thought, they said whatever they wanted!

“I want to be just like them!” Diamond Tiara squee’d. She slowly got off her bed and picked up a nearby package she ordered the day before. “Today, Diamond Tiara is dead!” she muttered as she opened the package, revealing a black and white striped T-shirt, sunglasses, and a large hat. “And Diamond Rizzle is born!”

“Yo, Pinks! Get me a chocolate milkshake, extra bubbles, fo’ I bust a cap in your flank!” Diamond Tiara demanded, slamming her bits on the counter.

“Okie doki loki!” Pinkie Pie said happily. She then hoofed over a large milkshake (with extra bubbles) and took Diamond Rizzle’s bits. “By the way, what do you mean by ‘cap’? Is that some kind of new game?”

“How should I know?! I’m just a kid, jeez!” Diamond Tiara grunted. She then took her milkshake and sat down at one of the tables. “All these honky grandmas be whack, yo,” Diamond Tiara muttered as she angrily sipped at her milkshake, glaring at the other patrons.

“Uh, Diamond Tiara?” someone called out, causing Diamond Tiara to growl in annoyance.

“It’s Diamond Rizzle now, yo!” she yelled out, turning to a confused Apple Bloom.

“Diamond...Rizzle?” Apple Bloom repeated slowly.

“That’s right! And you better get out of my grill, fo’ I bust a cap in your flank!”

“Bust a...cap? Diamond Tiara-”

“Rizzle!” Diamond Tiara interrupted, earning a sigh from Apple Bloom.

“Alright, Diamond Rizzle, what in tarnation are ya doing?”

“What’s it look like? I’m a gangsta, yo!” Diamond Tiara shouted. She quickly downed her entire milkshake and jumped from her seat, glaring at Apple Bloom behind her sunglasses. And if you know what’s good for you, stay out of my grill!” Diamond Tiara growled, before she began walking away.

“Diamond Tiara, wait!” Apple Bloom called out. Diamond Tiara slowly turned around and lowered her sunglasses and raised one of her eyebrows.

“What?”

“Well...can ya get a cutie mark in gangsta?” Apple Bloom asked, earning a smile from Diamond Tiara.

“Well we could always find out...together,” Diamond Tiara muttered as she inched towards Apple Bloom, smiling gently with her gold plated teeth.

“Ah...ah think ah’d like that,” Apple Bloom whispered, leaning towards Diamond Tiara slowly.

“I think I’d like that too, yo,” Diamond Tiara said as she brushed her lips against Apple Bloom’s, gently kissing her in front of everypony.

“And that’s why Diamond Tiara and Apple Bloom make a great couple, the end,” Snips said as he lowered his report paper, earning various looks from his classmates. Two particular fillies were glaring at him intensely, disgust evident on their faces.

“I would never wear such atrocious clothing!”

“Ah would never kiss Diamond Tiara if she had gold plated teeth! That’s unsanitary!”

“IS THAT WHAT YOU TWO ARE COMPLAINING ABOUT?!” Scootaloo yelled in disgust, staring in shock as Apple Bloom and Diamond Tiara complained about everything in the story. Everything except the surprise kiss, of course.

“This is the last show and tell we’re ever having,” Cheerilee muttered, drinking her cup of coffee as she tried to ignore the yelling fillies. She slowly turned her head towards the clock hanging by the door. “Three hours. Just three more hours.”

Author's Note

You may be thinking the ending was lazy and hastily put together.

....What? It's true, it was lazy and hastily put together -_-