Despair

by Dark Colt Sabata

Rating: teen
Tags: Sad, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Colgate, Dark
Length: 1927

Why bother trying to live when the world doesn't even try to help? Might as well do to said world a favor.

This is it, the pain, the loneliness, the sadness, I will end it all today.

A/N: This is my final fanfic, it's based off RL feelings, not that it matters anyway. It's recommended that you read this while listening to this song.

Published 2014-03-07 15:40:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-03-07 15:40:03 UTC

Goodbye forever.

The wind is blowing in my face, it actually feels a bit nice I must admit.

I open my eyes to look down at the forest from the cliff I sat on. It's certain that a fall of this height will kill me, just what I was hoping for.

My heart races as I begin to shiver slightly, I will be needing more time to be able to do this. I lay down in a sleeping position as I gaze to the night sky that Princess Luna had given this world, but monsters like me who contaminate this world by just existing cannot enjoy it.

I was alone, no matter what I did nor who I talked to, I was alone. This world has forgotten my existance and left me in oblivion, though I can't blame them.

I remember when I tried to talk with the bearers of the elements, it was the day that any hope I had on my mind had shattered. Not even the Element of Laughter came close to me, there was no party, not a greeting, no nothing. She just turned her back and ran away from me the moment I enter her line of sight.

The others did the same, the brash pegasus calling me all sorts of painful words as if I was some ultimate evil force. So I lived all alone from that day on, continuing to curse the world with my existance, I met someone else one day though.

Sitting on a bench on the lake was a brown coated unicorn stallion, he didn't have a cutie mark and his eyes were completely devoid of life, his long black mane blew for a moment due to a small gust of wind.

He didn't seem to notice the other pony who found him all alone on the lake walking up to him and sitting besides him, the mare smiled at him and he rolled an eye to her.

He recognized her, she was the town's dentist Minuette, also known as Colgate but he preferred to call her Minuette. She could almost immediatley feel the sadness and misery on his eyes, her smile crumbled into a frown as he slowly returned his gaze back at the lake.

"Um...hey there." She spoke first trying to spark a comversation.

Only to have silence as a response.

"What are you doing here all by yourself?"

No respone.

"Come on, is there something wrong? You can tell me anything." She brought up a hoof getting it near his shoulder.

"I cannot." He finally spoke making her hoof stop halfway.

"Why not? If it's about your cutie mark-"

"It's not." He cut her off "I don't care if I get my cutie mark or don't."

"Then what has you so down?"

"It would be pointless to tell."

The dentist mare finally fell quiet, whatever happened to this poor stallion has left him broken beyond any hope. She felt the tears roll down to her cheeks as she embraced the stallion into a hug, but he still was unresponsive.

"Don't worry, I'll help you, no matter what I will help you. You can trust me."

The stallion remained quiet, reminding himself the millions of times he had heard those words.

I sighed at the memory, I knew what was going to happen and it did happen the exact same way it had always happened. I knew what would happen to those who tried to help me, it's always the same.

My heart hurt as the memory played on my mind again.

It has been two weeks since Minuette had met the depressed stallion, he barely said anything but she had the basic idea of what was troubling him. They met again at the lake and she held him close to try making him better.

It was failing.

"So," She started as she released him from her grasp "You don't seem like a bad pony, somepony like you should be having some friends and even a special somepony."

"The day that happens will be the day where the cows fly and the nighttime will be neverending." He spoke with his gaze locked on the lake.

"Come on, don't be so pessimistic, I'm sure some mare will be interested in you." Her tone became slightly glum.

"Yeah right." He looked away from her, a tear escaping from his cheek.

"It's true! Don't be so hard on yourse-"

"Colgate!"

Both of them turned to the new voice calling out, another mare had come here and she was walking towards Minuette with a scowl.

"Look Berry, I-"

"Get over here now." Berry Punch grabbed her from the near and took her to a nearby bush. But what she didn't know was that the stallion could still hear them.

"Colgate, have you completely lost your fucking mind?" Berry yelled at her angrily.

"Look Berry, you don't understa-"

"I understand enough! That guy is bad news and he will just take advantage of you!"

"He's not like that!!" Minuette shouted at her back shivering as she let more tears flow "He's not a bad pony, he's just had a really bad luck, even if he doesn't want to tell me, I respect that."

"He's a parasite, don't you get it? That pony is bad news no matter how you look at it. Haven't you heard the rumors?"

He froze up at the mention of that, he knew of the rumors and most of them were true. Granted he may be a jerk at times, but it was always against the ones who abused of him in the past.

He got off the bench and ran back home as fast as his hooves could take him. Minuette's voice reached his ears, but he chose to ignore it, he wanted to be alone now.

I shed more tears, I had always kept my feelings to myself, after all nobody needs to deal with my crap. I remembered that I had locked myself in my house for a few days. It has always been by my lonesome even now, it's like a new law that the princesses declared in secret.

Speaking of them, I remember seeing Princess Luna in one of my nightmares, she didn't do anything to stop them, all she did was stare as if it was some punishment I deserved.

But I disgress, now there's the events of today that made me decide to make the world a favor.

The stallion was woken up by a knock on his door and navigated his messy home to open the door just enough for his eye to be seen, it was Minuette again who for some reason had visited him.

"Hey there, I'm sorry about Berry back there, she's an alcoholic and all." She started giving a smile to him.

As usual, she was met with silence and that same broken look that would have her in tears almost instantly.

"Don't listen to her, I'll always be there for you no matter what happens."

"Liar..." He whispered.

"What?" She tilted her head to the side.

"You lie, you will abandon me the first chance you get." His gaze fell to the floor as he openly wept.

"I'm not lying, I won't abandon you..." She reassured him on the verge to tears.

"YOU LIE!!" He yelled and glared at her as crows flelw off from a nearby tree.

Minuette led her tears flow free as the stallion went back to his depressed state, sitting on the floor and crying.

"I can't go trough this again, everyone I meet gets hurt sooner or later, and I get blamed despite being a victim." He said between sobs, burying his face on his hooves.

"It's alri-"

"No, it's not alright, it's never alright!" He stood up and dried his tears "No more, this will end today."

"Wait! What are you gonna do?!" She tried to use her magic to undo the chain, but to no avail.

"I'm gonna do the world a favor." He close the door on her and headed to the backdoor of the house. He could still hear her pleas and knocks on the door, but he didn't paid mind to her, he had done too much damage already by merely existing. She wouldn't understand, nobody would understand.

He got out of the backdoor and closed behind him, running towards the Everfree Forest as the night was coming.

This is how I got here, openly sobbing without a care in the world. I appraciate her for trying to help, but she will never understand me, not even the same of my kind would understand.

I have already wasted too much time, I had to do this here and now before I chicken out again and go back to Ponyville. I look back at Luna's precious night sky one more time. My heart tightens again, I feel like I'm not worthy of even looking at Luna's wonderful artwork I advert my eyes from it.

I take a couple of steps away from the edge of the cliff, taking my last breaths of fresh air and opening my eyes at the landscape. Do not worry Equestria, this action will being you lots of happiness.

I finally charge to the edge and leap from it, closing my eyes for one last time for me to embrace the darkness forever.

It is done, the parasite has been vanquished.

Minuette ran through the forest with an illuminating spell, she was getting tired of running for hours but the safety of her friend was more important to her. After running for hours she had earned a few cuts and bruises, she didn't had much choice than to sit down on a clearing to recover.

She had to deal with depression multiple times with Berry, but this seemed like a much more serious case. He was completely paranoid and untrustful of her, but she wouldn't let him be alone to suffer anymore, she would do anything it took to save him.

Her toughts were interrupted by the sound of a loud sickening crack nearby her location, with a loud gasp she galloped to the source of it fearing the worst. A large cliff came into view and at the base of it was what she feared the worst.

She slowed her pace down, letting the tears flow again as she chocked on them. Her friend layed there in a pool of his own blood, some of his back legs bending to impossible angles and blood flowing down from his forehead.

'No...' She stopped in front of the stallion's corpse, her legs shaking as she continued to cry.

'No, I barely knew you, but...' She knelt down and rested his head on top of his chest.

'You didn't have to, I hoped to get to know you better, to be friends and then more. But now all I hope is that you're in a better place now...' She hugged her friend close to her chest one more time, mourning for him for a while more.

'Rest in peace, I love you.'

Author's Note

Well that was crap, but screw it. That was my final fanfic and BOY does it suck, I don't know how many times I jumped the shark, but it doesn't matter anymore.

Soon enough I shall post my final Blog as well, and I'm pretty sure it will be as bullcrap as everything I do.

Also, Colgate represents the stallion's mare of his dreams, just so you know.