A Day with Discord

by jkbrony

Rating: everyone
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Random, Discord, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 6011

Though Twilight Sparkle managed to pass Discord's friendship test, he still remains unconvinced of their friendship. Fortunately, he's come up with the perfect idea for a new test...

Though Twilight Sparkle managed to pass Discord's friendship test, he still remains unconvinced of their friendship.

Fortunately, he's come up with the perfect idea for a new test...

Set after Three's a Crowd.

Published 2014-04-05 03:40:04 UTC
Last updated 2014-04-23 03:34:22 UTC

Missing something, Twilight?

Missing something, Twilight?

11:47 PM.

Twilight ascended the stairs up to her bedroom loft. Ordinarily she would have been more than ready to hit the hay, but she had recently come to realize that ever since becoming an alicorn princess, she was no longer as exhausted at night. This was largely due to the fact that Princess Celestia was no longer giving her any lengthy assignments to complete or reports to compile. She now spent much of her free time studying the mystery box from the Tree of Harmony, as well as doing other research just for the sake of it. Though she wouldn't admit it to Celestia herself, Twilight was starting to miss being her student. This whole princess thing had come so suddenly, so unexpectedly. She had managed to adapt to most of the changes, but the thought that she might have to rule over kingdom someday made her uneasy. She hated it when the thought crossed her mind since every time it did, it took a while for her to think about something else. And now that it had just crossed her mind once again, she needed to do something right now to rid herself of it, otherwise she would lie awake thinking about it.

Fortunately, she had an idea...

"Hey, Spike?" she said, just before the infant dragon climbed into bed.

"Hm?"

"You know, I read in Celestia's journal that she and Luna used to play all kinds of games together. And they had that entire castle to play around in."

"Really?" Spike raised an eyebrow inquisitively.

"Yeah. Isn't it strange to think that they were once children themselves?"

Spike shrugged somewhat indifferently. "I guess. But we already know that there was a time long ago when they weren't ruling over Equestria, so it's not that hard to believe."

"Even so, it's weird to think that they, of all ponies, would have played games like tag and hide-and-seek in their youth—the same games that we used to play together. Remember that?"

Spike nodded. "Yeah. That was fun."

"We played tag all the time," Twilight smirked. "And you never able to catch me."

"Well you did have a bit of an advantage, Twilight," Spike pointed out. "I was still figuring out the basics of running on two legs. It's not like there were any more of my species around who could teach me. But I don't have any problem keeping up with you anymore. If we were play right now, I'd be able to catch you, no problem."

"Oh, you think so, do you?" Twilight grinned widely. "Well, let's just see for ourselves."

Twilight jumped down from the loft and positioned herself in the center of her bedroom.

"Let's play a quick game. If you can catch me, I'll treat you to any breakfast you want tomorrow morning."

Spike looked at her with confusion.

"Really, Twi? Right here? Right now?"

"That's right!"

"But there's hardly any room to run around in here. Besides, I'm kinda tired."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I must not have heard you correctly. You see, I thought the words that you just used a second ago were: 'If we were to play right now I'd be able to catch you, no problem.' But I clearly must have been mistaken. Either that, or now that I've actually challenged you, you're backing out because you don't really believe that you can," Twilight grinned even wider, growing more energized by the second. "So which is it, Spike?"

Spike cut his eyes into a glare. "Okay, Twilight. You're on."

"Well come on, then!"

Spike charged down the stairs, but Twilight curiously made no attempt to move. Just as he closed in on her, Twilight's horn illuminated and in two pink flashes of light, she vanished from that spot and was now back up on the loft.

"Gotta be quicker than that!"

"That's not fair!" Spike exclaimed, once he realized what had happened.

"What's the matter, Spike?" she giggled. "Giving up already?"

Spike grunted and dashed back up the stairs.

The game carried on for more than ten minutes. Spike chased Twilight as she teleported all over her room, giggling and taunting him the whole time. Sweat dripped heavily from his forehead. His efforts to catch her seemed pathetically futile, as she continued to vanish just out of his reach. However, he knew that Twilight was not able to perform vast amounts of magic without tiring herself out as well. All he would need to do was hold out just a bit longer than she could.

"Too...slow!" Twilight said, breathing heavily after teleporting once again from the top of her bed to the middle of her room where she started.

It was more than clear now that chasing after her was never going to work. He needed a new strategy, and fortunately, he had one in mind. He suddenly stopped running and instead walked up to Twilight slowly, his body bent forward and his tail sagging on the ground to illustrate his exhaustion. He stopped just a few feet away from her.

"Are you....giving up?" Twilight asked, looking somewhat relieved.

"Well..."

Spike suddenly leapt in her direction, his claws outstretched and his mouth forming a wicked smile, convinced that he had finally won.

"Whoa!" Twilight was left with no time to teleport, but she was still not without options.

Her wings opened up and she jumped upwards, just narrowly avoiding Spike, who crashed flat on his face in the spot she had just occupied. She hovered in place just above him.

"Nice try!" she giggled.

Spike lifted his head up, now fuming. This was no longer a game; he was going to catch Twilight if it took him all night.

"THAT'S....NOT....FAIR!!!" he yelled as he jumped up several times to touch her, but as always, she was just out of his reach. Twilight grinned mockingly at him.

The task now seemed more impossible than ever. Twilight was going to stay up there forever. She was never coming down. The only way to catch her now was to bring her down. After quickly formulating another strategy, Spike mustered whatever speed remained from his legs and ran up to the loft. With his momentum at its peak, he leapt from the very edge and soared towards Twilight, his claws outstretched yet again.

This was his final effort. He had now consumed the last of his energy and knew that he would have no chance to catch her if he failed to do it now.

Twilight didn't bother moving, certain that he would not reach her. His momentum was dropping quickly and he was falling to the floor.

Spike's arms were extended as far as possible. He was close.

So close.

Just a little closer...

Spike's claws finally made contact with the hoof of Twilight's right hind leg. She was pulled to the ground almost instantly, landing flat onto her stomach. Once she was grounded, Spike immediately jumped upon her back as though fearful she would take off again.

"I got you!" he exclaimed.

Twilight giggled and picked herself back up onto her hooves.

"Alright, I guess you win. That was fun, wasn't it?"

Spike removed himself from her back and huffed angrily. "You cheated!"

"I never said that I would be running," Twilight pointed out. "I only said that you had to catch me."

He shot her an annoyed glare.

"Okay, okay, maybe I was having a little too much fun at your expense," she wrapped a hoof around him and pulled him toward her. "I'm sorry, Spike. Forgive me?"

Spike sighed and his glare faded from his face. "Yeah. Oh, and I think a ruby and emerald omelette would be perfect."

"All right," Twilight chuckled and nuzzled his cheek. "Come on, it's time for bed."

"You don't have to...tell me twice."

Twilight ascended the stairs up to the loft with Spike nearly half asleep on her back, his arms wrapped around her neck. A quick glance at the clock showed that it was just after midnight. Not only had she managed to clear her thoughts, she was now much more ready for bed than she was before.

She tucked Spike into his bed and climbed into her own. They fell swiftly and soundly asleep, oblivious of what tomorrow would have in store for them, but still without any reason to expect that it would be anything more than another ordinary day.

****

Twilight awoke several hours later feeling wholly revitalized with her exhaustion completely washed away. She emerged from her bed to find Spike still asleep with a spot of drool on his pillow ebbing from his wide open mouth. She chuckled.

"Come on, Spike, wake up. Are you ready for—"

Her voice died instantly. She had intended to magically lift the blanket from Spike's body, but no aura had appeared around her horn. She tried again.

Nothing.

And again.

Nothing. Spike stirred obliviously in his sleep.

Twilight froze in a sudden panic. Her cutie mark was a symbol of her magical ability, and yet she was now struggling to do a levitation spell. A levitation spell—the most basic of unicorn magic! A spell that she had mastered as a filly, and now came almost just as easily to her as walking! She trotted quickly around her room, attempting to levitate anything her eyes came across: books, quills, scrolls. However, she was unable to get so much as a spark to emerge from her horn. She couldn't get any other spell to work either, not even teleportation, which she had used more than a dozen times mere hours ago.

She raced downstairs in the hopes of finding a book that would point her in the direction of a remedy for whatever illness this had to be. However, without magic, she was stuck browsing through a single book at a time, a single page at a time. After twenty minutes of searching through books relating to magical illnesses, she was unable to pinpoint one that impeded magical ability entirely—at least not without several other symptoms accompanying it that she didn't have.

With her mind still racing around options, Twilight dashed back upstairs to Spike's bed.

"Spike, Spike, Spike, Spike, Spike!" she shook him rapidly. "Wake up! Wake up!"

The infant dragon jolted upward, letting out a startled shriek.

"Twilight!" he said irritably, rubbing his eyes and wiping away the saliva that dripped from his mouth. "What is it?"

"There's....there's...." Twilight struggled with her next words, as though she was terrified to say them. "....something wrong with my horn! I can't do any magic!"

Spike scratched the back of his head.

"What?"

"I don't know! That's what I'm trying to figure out!" Twilight trotted rapidly in place. "I mean, I'm pretty sure it's some kind of illness, but I can't figure out what it is! It's not Poison Joke, otherwise my horn would be flopping. The Pony Pox has been known to interfere with a unicorn's magic, but it's clearly not that either. And it's not Hornovanitis or Unicorniosis since those illnesses are usually...oh my gosh! I just realized that I've only been looking up unicorn illnesses! But I'm an alicorn, and I don't know of ANY alicorn illnesses! How did I not think to check?! I don't even know if I have any books on alicorn illnesses! What am I going to--?!"

"Twilight, calm down!" Spike threw himself from his bed and placed a hand on her neck.

She looked as though she were moments away from bursting into tears.

"It'll be okay," he reassured her. "We'll just go to the hospital and have the doctors find out what's wrong with you."

Spike reached up and carefully touched her horn. It instantly fell from her head.

Twilight shrieked in bewilderment and numbness overtook her body. That didn't just happen. It couldn't have happened.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Spike cried, reaching down to pick it up. "Here, let me just...."

He instantly noticed that the horn felt unusual in his hands. It wasn't as hard or sturdy as it normally was—instead, it felt almost as if it were a toy.

"This isn't your horn, Twilight. It's....rubber."

"Huh?!"

"See?" Spike bent the horn multiple times, demonstrating its flexibility.

Twilight blinked, feeling even more numb. She was struck with an urge to dunk her head in cold water to wake herself up from this horrible nightmare.

"You know, your wings kinda look a little different, too," Spike remarked.

He touched Twilight's right wing. Like the horn, it instantly fell to the ground. He examined it closely and realized that it was in a permanently closed state and also rubbery like a toy.

"It's...fake," he said warily.

Twilight looked over at her left wing and attempted to extend it, but it remained closed. She touched it hesitantly and it fell from her body like all the rest.

"This is weird..." Spike scratched his head, looking sorrowfully at the now hornless and wingless Twilight.

Twilight slowly pulled herself out of shock. This was no illness. There was only one being she knew of who was capable of doing something like this...

"DISCORD!!! DISCORD, WHERE ARE YOU?!"

Almost instantly, the draconequus appeared just overhead.

"Well, that's some wake-up call," Discord grumbled, stretching his limbs. As he did so, the books in Twilight's bedroom flew off the shelves and began a synchronized dance upon the floor.

"How are you today, Princess Twilight? I must say, you look a bit different since I last saw you. Is that a new mane cut?"

Twilight glared scornfully at him.

"No? Tail cut, perhaps? New coat shine? A little nip here, a little tuck there? Hm?"

Twilight said nothing.

"Oh come on, help me out. I know there's something different about you, I just can't...." he touched the top of Twilight's head where her horn used to be. "....put my finger on it..."

"Give Twilight her horn and wings back!" Spike growled, pointing a warning claw at the draconequus.

"Oh, that's what it is! Well, I certainly shall...eventually," replied Discord. "In the meantime, why don't you hold onto them?"

He snapped his fingers and a bright flash smothered Spike. Twilight cringed at the sight of her horn and wings now attached to his body. Her horn lay just below his frontal spine, and her wings were spread wide open upon his back. Spike yelped and struggled to pull them off, but it was impossible. Her wings were much too heavy for him to support, and he fell forward onto his belly.

"What's wrong with you?!" Twilight finally spoke. "Why are you doing this?!"

"Well, as painful as it is to admit, and as hard as it is to believe, I, Discord, have made a terrible mistake."

"And that would be...?"

"After I recovered from that terrible, terrible flu, I went back home to my thinking tree, and I did some thinking. And I did some more thinking. And I thought to myself, 'Discord, I believe that you may have given Princess Twilight a pass that she didn't deserve. Your friendship test did nothing to prove your friendship with Equestria's newest princess. She didn't retrieve that giant flower and do battle with that miserable worm for you—oh no, no, no, no. She did it so that she could get you out of her hair as quickly as possible, and then continue her special day with Princess Cadence as though you had never bothered her at all. If anything, all your friendship test did was prove how much you two aren't friends because of the lengths she was willing to go to be rid of you.'"

Twilight was livid. "Are you seriously—?!"

"'And even worse!'" Discord threw himself into Twilight's bed, adding a dramatic tone to his voice. "'After you had fallen victim to that dreadful flu and you were in dire need of care, our dear princess was nowhere to be found! She brought you to Fluttershy so that she would not have to care for you herself, and did not visit you even once after that. She wouldn't even extend such a kindness as to get you a simple glass of water...'"

An empty glass appeared in Discord's hand and he shook it in front of Twilight, only to drop it to the floor.

"'It was only by the kindhearted nature of the caring, hospitable, and overly compassionate Fluttershy that were you able to recover at all. If only Princess Twilight could show you just a fraction of the kindness you receive from that lovable pony...'"

Twilight angrily rolled her eyes. Discord removed himself from her bed.

"GET THESE OFF ME!" Spike yelled, continuing to wrestle with Twilight's wings, attempting to manage them in some way that would allow him to stand up straight. Discord ignored him.

"Of course, once I came to that realization, I knew that I had made a terrible mistake in passing you, which means that I'm still unconvinced that the two of us are really friends. And then I realized something else. Princess Twilight only received her little promotion after she discovered the magic of friendship. But how deserving of that title could she truly be if she has so much trouble accepting dear old Discord as a friend, especially after all the work he's done to change his ways?"

A halo appeared over Discord's head and he gave Twilight a misty-eyed stare.

Twilight now glared at him fiercer than ever. "You haven't done—"

"And that was when I came up with the idea of a new test! If you spend a single day with me like any two good friends would, I will consider you worthy of your Princess status and return your horn and wings."

Discord snapped his fingers again and Twilight's horn and wings vanished from Spike's body, much to his relief. In addition, the books stopped dancing and fell flat upon the floor, restored to their inanimate state. Spike picked himself up onto his feet.

"Why don't you just cut the act and tell us what you really want from Twilight?!" he snapped. "I mean, you don't honestly expect us to believe that you're really that interested in being her friend, do you?"

Discord scoffed as though offended.

"Well, of course I am! After all, isn't friendship the very thing that managed to reform me? It's just that apart from sweet Fluttershy, nopony has really taken the opportunity to truly get to know me. It's just so disappointing that I've come such a long way in my reformation, and yet after all of it, I'm only left with one single friend."

Twilight stamped a hoof, now utterly sick of hearing Discord's voice.

"On a day I was able to spend with Cadence, which, by the way, probably won't happen again for a very long time, you faked an illness and had us to travel to some remote area of Equestria while hauling you on an oversized throne the entire way. And once there, you had us retrieve an enormous flower, the petals of which we were to use to create an elixir that YOU DIDN'T EVEN NEED, only to be attacked by a crazy giant worm which nearly gobbled the both of us up. And then after we defeated the worm and brought you the flower, we find out that the entire ordeal was your plan from the beginning. And you wonder why we're not the best of friends?!"

Discord rolled his eyes apathetically. "Oh, come now. It's not like I actually ruined your day. In fact, as I recall, Princess Cadence said she enjoyed my little test far more than whatever boring plans you had made with her."

"Much to your disappointment, I'm sure!"

Discord smirked and shrugged innocently.

"Well, I wouldn't have felt the need to give you that little exam, nor this one, had I not had any reason to believe that the two of us aren't really friends. I assure you, you won't be risking your life this time around. All you need to do is spend a single easygoing, non-eventful day with me. No danger, no unexpected surprises, just bonding and truly getting to know each other. Of course, you'll have to convince me that you're actually trying to be my friend, and not just trying to get this over with as quickly as possible to get your precious horn and wings back. Could you do that, Princess Twilight?"

Twilight sighed and glared to herself.

"Well, it's not like I have much of a choice..."

"My sentiments exactly!" Discord beamed. "I'll be waiting downstairs."

And with that, Discord vanished. Twilight glanced regretfully at Spike.

"Sorry, Spike. Looks like that omelette will have to wait."

"What do you think he's up to?" he asked. "You don't believe he really wants to be your friend, do you?"

Twilight shook her head. "I don't know. Maybe that is what he really wants, or maybe all he's doing is taking advantage of the fact that we can't use the Elements of Harmony against him."

"Are you sure about this?"

"I guess we'll find out..."

Twilight took a deep breath and walked downstairs. This was going to be a really long day...

Earth Pony for a Day

Earth Pony for a Day

Twilight stared blankly into a bowl of strawberry oatmeal that lay on a table just beneath her face. The draconequus sat opposite her, his eyes shut, sipping blissfully on a cup of tea.

They had decided to begin their special day of bonding with breakfast at Hay and Clover. Ponies sitting at nearby tables stared over at them in awe, unsure of which was a more astonishing sight: the infamous draconequus Discord sitting peacefully and not causing any of the chaos he was so well-known for, or the newly-crowned Princess Twilight Sparkle lacking both her horn and wings.

"Isn't this nice, Twilight?" Discord asked setting his tea down on the table. "I absolutely love a cup of tea in the early morning. Truly there no better way to begin a day."

Twilight did not respond, and instead closed her eyes in a vain attempt to rid herself of the humiliation she was feeling. A waiter reluctantly approached their table.

"C-Can I get you anything else...sir?" he asked Discord nervously.

"Another slice of lemon for this tea, if you would," Discord answered in a manner much more civil than what could generally be expected of him.

"Y-yes, of course. And you, Princess?"

Twilight shook her head, her eyes still shut.

"Right. I'll...be back," he said, and walked away hastily.

Steam rose up heavily from the oatmeal, brushing past Twilight's face. Though it had been cooked hot and steamy, just how she had requested, she was unable to find any desire to eat.

As of today, Twilight Sparkle was an earth pony. An earth pony! Yesterday she was an alicorn—which was about as far from an earth pony as a pony could possibly be.

The lack of wings was not really a problem. Twilight had lived most of her life without them and had yet to grow particularly attached to them. Though Rainbow Dash would have surely been driven insane by no longer having the ability to fly, Twilight felt that she could easily continue living without it. After all, it wasn't as though she had actually known that she was going to become an alicorn someday. Flying was not an ability she had ever expected to have. Admittedly, however, she was quite grateful to remember what it was like to not have wings. Her body felt so much lighter that she didn't even realize just how heavy they were until now.

The lack of a horn, however, was an entirely different story. It had been firmly attached to Twilight's head since birth, and she was unspeakably fond of it. The only thing she was perhaps more passionate about than magic was reading. Twilight could still remember the day she had first performed a successful levitation spell—on a book. She remembered being incredibly overjoyed at the notion that she would actually be able to read without having to hold a book in her hooves. Throughout the years, she spent innumerable hours reading through all manner of spellbooks, learning as many spells as she was able while coming back to the more difficult spells after her abilities had increased. Without her horn, Twilight felt as though she had been turned inside out. So much of her life was based around her magical ability—her cutie mark, her prior studentship under Celestia, her Element of Harmony...

However, this was not the first time she had been without it. During her first encounter with Discord, he had removed it while she and her friends engaged in his game to search for the Elements of Harmony in the Canterlot Palace Labyrinth. However, he had returned it to her after they had lost the game, and so Twilight had little reason to believe that he would not stand by his promise to return her horn and wings once she passed his test.

The problem, of course, was actually passing the test. Discord was probably the last living being in the world Twilight would have chosen to spend a day with. Even spending a day with Maud Pie and listening to her recite every piece of rock poetry she ever wrote was a more appealing proposition. As challenging as it would be to find the willpower to endure a day with him, treating him as an actual friend would be an even bigger challenge. Though Discord had supposedly reformed himself and changed his ways, he had not done much to show it—at least not to Twilight. When the Everfree Forest went awry during the last Summer Sun Celebration, Discord feigned ignorance and Twilight did not find out until after it was all over that the whole thing had been caused by seeds he had planted thousands of years ago. And of course, Discord's previous friendship test had been mostly intended to disrupt Twilight's day with Cadence, and the only reason she didn't completely hate him for it was because Cadence had enjoyed it more than having a quiet, relaxing day.

Needless to say, between all of that and everything that had happened that morning, treating Discord like he was a good friend was going to be exceptionally difficult.

"Is something wrong, Twilight?" Discord asked after several minutes of dead silence between them. "I see you have not touched your oatmeal."

Twilight sighed, finally opening her eyes again.

"No, Discord. Everything's just....fine."

"Well, that's certainly great to hear, because for just a moment, I was thinking that you were perhaps wishing that you did not have to spend the day with me," he said, raising a suspicious eyebrow at her.

Twilight contorted her face in annoyance.

"No. Of course not," she mumbled irritably.

The waiter returned carrying a small plate with a slice of lemon in one hoof. Almost instantly, the lemon jumped from the plate and hopped over to Discord's tea cup on the table. It hovered over the cup and scrunched itself up tightly, releasing lemon juice into the tea. Once finished, it hopped back onto the plate.

"Thank you," said Discord.

The waiter stared at the lemon with wary apprehension.

"Uhhh...sure...no problem. J-just...let me know if you need anything else," he replied, and hurried away once again.

Discord picked up the tea cup and resumed sipping.

"So....how has life been treating you since you received your little promotion?"

Twilight looked up at him. Making small talk seemed a pretty good place to start if she was going to treat him like a friend.

"Uhh...fine. Just fine," she answered with feigned enthusiasm. "And how has life been treating you since you've been....unstoned?"

"Oh, I can't complain. Though I must admit, it does become increasingly difficult to resist certain...urges, if you will."

Twilight raised an eyebrow. "What kind of urges?"

"Oh, you know, little things: wreaking chaos and havoc upon the world, sowing some more of my little seeds, usurping Celestia as the ruler of Equestria. Just little things like that. But the curious thing is that I find these urges have become so much harder to resist now that I know that you ponies would not be able to use your Elements of Harmony against me if I suddenly decided to give into them..."

Twilight cut her eyes into a glare.

"Of course, it's not like I actually would," Discord said with an innocent tone. "I'm reformed, after all."

A halo appeared over his head as before.

"Right...," Twilight said, rolling her eyes.

"Oh, why do you have such a hard time believing me?" he asked, crossing his arms. "You look at me and all you see is the old Discord. The Discord who did not understand friendship. Not unlike yourself, Twilight Sparkle. Would you not say that you've become a better pony since you've discovered the magic of friendship?"

Twilight paused, almost stunned that Discord was actually making her think deeply for a response. The life she had led before meeting her friends now felt like a long-lost memory. Once she had been accepted into Celestia's school, reading and studying had been her sole priorities. She remembered constantly being invited to hang out with her fellow classmates, only to reject their invitations every time. She remembered hearing about various parties and social gatherings taking place in the dorms, and thinking it was ridiculous that her classmates would waste valuable study time by attending them. She remembered being annoyed at Spike's continued absence due to him spending time with the ponies she had declined to spend time with.

And she remembered how irritated she had been when Princess Celestia had tasked her with making friends in Ponyville...

"Yeah, I....I suppose so..." she answered casually.

"And yet you doubt that friendship could have the same effect on me?"

"No...," Twilight sighed. "I'm just saying you haven't done much to show it. This..." She pointed to the top of her head. "...reminds me a lot of the 'old Discord.'"

The draconequus shrugged nonchalantly.

"Well perhaps you could ask yourself why you have so much trouble accepting me as a friend, particularly when dear, sweet Fluttershy already has."

Twilight groaned in frustration.

"What do you expect, Discord? We were enemies once, after all."

"Oh, that's hardly an excuse!"

Discord instantly snapped his fingers and a pair of reading glasses and a scroll appeared before him. The glasses had half-moon lenses which were much smaller than his large eyes. Discord put them on and opened the scroll. After clearing his throat, he began to read aloud:

"Dear Princess Celestia,

Friendship is a wondrous and powerful thing. Even the worst of enemies can become friends. You need understanding and compromise. You've got to share, you've got to care.

Your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle"

Twilight's jaw dropped. "How did you get—?!"

"You see, Twilight?" Discord interrupted, snapping his fingers again to make the scroll disappear. The glasses remained on his face. "'Understanding and compromise.' Those were your own words. Do you believe that we are incapable of reaching that?"

"Well...no, but..."

"And how about this?"

Discord snapped his fingers again and a second scroll materialized out of thin air. Ignoring Twilight's obvious disapproval, he took the letter and read it aloud:

"Dear Princess Celestia,

It's hard to believe that two ponies who seem to have so little in common could ever get along. But I found out that if you embrace each other's differences, you just might be surprised to discover a way to be friends after all.

Always your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle"

"Where are you getting—?!" Twilight said, flustered.

"'Embrace each other's differences'", Discord interrupted again. "I'm not a pony, mind you, but does the same concept not apply to me?"

Twilight groaned, growing incredibly irritated.

"And just one more for the record..."

NO!" she shouted, but Discord's fingers snapped anyway, and a third letter appeared in his hand while the previous letter vanished simultaneously.

"Dear Princess Celestia,

My friends and I all learned an important lesson this week: never judge a book by its cover. Someone may look unusual, or funny, or scary, but you have to look past that and learn who they are inside. Real friends don't care what your cover is. It's the contents of a pony that count. And a good friend, like a good book, is something that will last forever.

Your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle"

"You wrote this one after you made friends your zebra friend, if I'm not mistaken? Does that not prove that I do not have to be a pony for the two us to become friends?"

Twilight looked at him with annoyance.

"Oh, don't give me that," Discord said, snapping his fingers to make both the letter and his glasses disappear. "I've read all of your little letters to Celestia. The point is that these are all friendship lessons that you've learned already, Twilight. Therefore, accepting me as a friend really should not be much of a problem for you at all."

"Those letters were not for you!" Twilight said angrily. "You had no right to read them!"

Discord shrugged again.

"I was simply curious," he said with the innocent tone that Twilight was now more than sick of hearing. "From what I understand, you used those letters to restore faith in your friendships after I had....well, you know what I did. There's no point in bringing up the past, is there?"

Twilight sighed, rubbing her forehead with her hoof. Steam no longer rose from her oatmeal.

"How can you just do the things that you do and expect us to be friends? Friendship actually requires compassion and care, among several other things that I've never once seen from you. I mean, do you even know what you put me through this morning?! I was terrified! You couldn't have just told me what you were planning? You had to give me a fake horn and fake wings and wait for me to freak out over it?!"

Discord scoffed, as though refusing to allow himself to be guilt-tripped.

"Fine, fine. I admit that it was probably a bit more extreme than I had intended. Friends do still prank each other, do they not?"

"Not like that!"

Discord let out an irritated sigh and tugged on his beard.

"Fine. I'm...sorry," he said, turning his head to the side so as to avoid eye contact with her. The moment he uttered the final word, his teacup sprouted tiny legs, jumped from the table and sprinted away. "Now was that caring and compassionate enough for you?"

"Hardly," Twilight responded bitterly.

"I'm...sorry," he reiterated with more sincerity than before, but still without looking in her direction. Twilight's bowl of oatmeal also sprouted legs and scurried away after the teacup. "Better?"

"Not really," she replied as she watched her breakfast run away. "A sincere apology requires eye contact, Discord."

Discord grumbled and took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry!" he said loudly, looking Twilight dead in the eye. At that moment, there was a sudden uproar. Every plate and bowl at every nearby table sprouted legs and hurried off, most with meals still on them. The ponies seated at the tables glared at Discord, who shrugged innocently. Twilight buried her face in her hooves.

"All right, Twilight, I shall prove to you just how caring and compassionate I truly am," Discord said as he removed himself from his seat. "Let us be off now. There is something I'd like to show you."

The scene had turned to chaos. Some of the ponies decided to chase after their runaway breakfasts, while others went to their waiters to express their dissatisfaction.

"Oh, and you wouldn't mind picking up the tab, would you, friend?" Discord asked smugly.

Twilight groaned, wishing she could simply teleport or fly away from her seat. The day was already off to a bad start and she did not have much hope that the rest of it would be any better. This was surely going to be one tough test to pass...