My Baby Sister

The torn sky was out of sight. Clouds obscured it and blacked out the light of every star. Not a single ray managed to pierce through them and so the night grew only colder. Yet the orange earth pony wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

The darkness, the cold chill running through her bones and piercing into her wounds, that was all preferable to the sight of a cloudless sky.

Even though she could only barely make out where she was going, at least she could hear that the world around her remained quiet. Apart from her, nopony was awake. She found that a great relief, but her breathing sounded horrid in her ears. It was like the ringing of a bell, begging for the others to wake.

She walked along the road very carefully, barely recognising her surroundings. Barely, but one quick look at the silhouettes still told her everything she needed to know. To her side stood a building she hadn’t visited in quite some time, and the faint but lingering smell of it even touched her nose. Weird; it hadn’t even been a week since she had last been here with her friends. Maybe one of these days she’d go back to Sugarcube Corner with her sister.

One of these days.

She returned to crawling along Ponyville, every step echoing like the loudest shout in her ears. The pony felt how weak her legs were, how hard breathing came to her and she was painfully aware of what would happen if she would misjudge her situation by one step. She didn’t want to wake anypony up. It was late enough for all of them to be asleep, nopony but her was awake.

She couldn’t miscalculate.

Every step felt like the sting of syringe, a boost to her sweating and her shivering. Moment by moment passed as she went past the buildings of her hometown, with nothing but the sound of her steps and her breaths accompanying her. The darkness pressed against her like walls of stone, its weight letting her bones hurt and tears fall from her eyes. Still, she didn’t do anything but move forward. That was all she could do.

The saddlebags’ sweet scent lingered in the air, even above the distant smell of something rotting. She wondered what it was, but only for a moment. If there was anypony dumping their trash on the town square, they’d probably do it for a purpose. If they had a purpose, she should probably just ignore them. They may have known what they were doing, and she was certain to know what she needed to do.

Changing, the road twisted itself onwards. She had walked it a million times, just a few weeks ago. She knew the way to the Golden Oaks Library and Carousel Boutique, she remembered the shop that sold sofas and quills and the path to the Everfree and Fluttershy’s home, even the road to her sister’s school and the one that led down the fields to where a house was built out of a white cloud, home to Rainbow Dash.

This pony remembered all the roads here, and she would never forget, but they weren’t where she was going. No, they were Ponyville, and she didn’t want to be in Ponyville anymore.

Twisting, the road went on, past the last houses and to where the trees started to grow. Some had burnt in a fire, some others had died a long time ago, while only a few remained alive.

They’re there an’ you don’t need to worry ‘bout nothing, she told herself and made her eyes stare forward. Her ears were perked, just in case, but she couldn’t, wouldn’t look. If there was a faintest glow by the edge of her sight it would be over anyway. That’s how it had gone for everypony else, but a small light appearing and then … No, she needn’t think about it.

She tip-toed onwards, her hooves and legs hurting, every move she made reminded her of the wounds she carried. Every single time her left forehoof touched the ground, she likened the feeling to a rusty nail piercing through it and then shoving itself through her arm and then through the bones of her shoulder. The pain was enough to make her scream, but she didn’t.

She ground her teeth so hard they hurt and the tears only grew in number. Maybe she could have just let herself fall in that instance, but it wasn’t over yet, she still had something, somepony waiting for her at the end.

Applejack took her steps like her breaths, slow and controlled. No matter what would happen, she just needed to get home. She tried her best to ignore the darkness, to focus merely on the path before her, but she felt a chill, nervosity growing as she felt herself being watched. Yet she made herself aware that everypony was asleep, they wouldn’t come out before Celestia’s brightest star reached up from beyond the horizon.

Sweet Apple Acres was how they called this place, and it was the greatest apple farm in all of Equestria. She had never managed to count all those trees they had here, nor the fields beyond. Reflecting on it, Applejack found it amazing that they had only lived a modest life despite producing the best apples in the world. An old family recipe it had been, to give as much as possible and survive with as little as possible, as happily as possible. It had been the kind of lifestyle Rarity had frowned upon, Applejack remembered.

“You know,” the white unicorn with the wavy mane of indigo had said, “with how much your family is earning, I never understood why you wear that old hat.”

She had known, back then, and she cracked a smile.

Nowadays, talking like it had all been in the distant past came easy to her, yet Rarity had only asked her a few weeks ago, and Applejack had given her an answer. Strangely, it didn’t come to her now, but instead she simply felt the pain surge through her leg once more, breaking her out of her thoughts. She needed to get home, lie down for a bit, somepony was waiting for her and she needed to be by her side.

Another step, another stinging bolt of pain. I wonder if I’m bleeding? Applejack shook her head, hoping not.

Once more the pain came, digging itself deep into her shoulder. For a moment it felt like the pain would overtake her, but then it was gone and she wasn’t fazed by it anymore. Her sight got all blurry, but she didn’t cry. There was no reason to. Everypony was asleep and she needed to be quiet because of it. Everypony was relying on her.

Honestly, Applejack had no idea why the tears didn’t stop and the shivers ran down her spine as the darkness of the night surrounded her. She needed to be quiet, lest she wake anypony up.

The gate came into sight, the sign with the tell-tale apple offering the promise of the warm hearth she had come to love so much over the years. Applejack dried her tears before she continued on. I can’t let her see me like this, she thought.

The saddlebags were still there, everything was fine, she had made it. There was absolutely nothing to worry about and no reason to look riled up. Everything was fine, and that was all she needed to tell herself.

Applejack moved on then, down the road and up the last hill. Past the well, ignoring the sounds that came from deep down, and past the big red house, ignoring the sight of barricaded doors and windows. Her path led up to where the cider house stood, a large construct with a roof looking like it had been made out of many oversized barrels, with faint light shining through the windows of the highest room.

Applejack put on a brave smile as she stepped onto the top of the mountain, past the lines painted on the ground by Twilight, once, only a few weeks ago, and hurried up the wooden ramp towards the door. A lantern lit the entrance of the house up, a paper one Big Mac had made when he had been much younger. It was the only light beneath the dark sky, the one thing that made her feel safe. It seemed strange to her how Big Macintosh was really close and still she needed a memento of his.

The earth pony almost felt like a little filly again, but she couldn’t be, since she was the big sister and that was something she was perfectly fine with. There was a reason why she needed to be strong and why she could be strong. She’d brave every monster and every nightmare for that pony, her beloved sibling.

With that thought on her mind she lifted her hoof up. The light shone on her coat and the patches where it had fallen off. For the most part, the flesh looked still fine, but every part of her body was littered with bruises and cuts. She didn’t want Apple Bloom to look at them, so she’d gotten bandages from the pharmacy.

Minuette hadn’t been there, but when she returned, she would find money on the counter, because Applejack would never steal, no matter what would happen.

She nodded to herself, that was nothing she needed to worry about now.

Next she let her hoof slip beneath the bandanna around her neck. The piece of cloth was dyed with as many stripes as it had colors, and they encompassed the range of five, each one the coat of a beloved friend who lived in this town.

The piece of cloth had replaced her hat after it had fallen into the well, but it made her feel just as comfortable.

She reached for the keys hidden on a chain beneath, and put them into the lock, nicely and quietly. Everypony was asleep and she shouldn’t wake them up. Granny Smith had taught her the courtesies well and she wouldn’t forget them.

Applejack was a big sister, a role model.

Every thought on her mind was positive now, she was ready to this. She turned the key, every part of her arm cried out in pain. Luckily for her, there was no pain, none at all, and she opened the door quickly, neatly, and stepped into the old cider house.

Most of the barrels were in the cellar, only one stood on the first floor, right across the corridor, though it stood there only as a means to barricade the ladder.

The cider house was fairly small, it had one small room upstairs where once guests slept, and beneath the corridor was her late father’s kingdom. Applejack smiled, before she put out her head again, blowing the candle in the lantern out and closing the door so that the spells would work uninterrupted.

Can’t have any guests disturbing Apple Bloom, she thought and locked this realm from the outer world. She then turned around, moving to the end of the corridor, past the empty walls she and Pinkie had painted red, with smiling golden stars.

She enjoyed them more than the sky outside.

The ladder went up and down behind the barrel, so Applejack decided that the best move would be to pull it away and towards the door before she jumped over it. If anypony would come, the barrel would be in the way and they would leave them undisturbed. Usually, she enjoyed having ponies come over for a visit, but today was not a good day for that. Apple Bloom’s birthday would come up soon enough, and then they could have guests.

Today, all she wanted was to keep the little rascal safe and sound.

She took the ladder with a steady grip, moving up, with the weight of the saddlebags against her. Still, she moved on, because the bandages would need to be applied and Apple Bloom would enjoy the other things she got from her nightly trip to the town. Applejack could do naught but smile as she put up her good arm and pushed the trap-door open.

The room she and Apple Bloom slept in nowadays wasn’t as large as Apple Bloom’s old room, but still sizeable enough to hold two beds, each to one side of the window at the other end of the room; a cabinet with everything cloth related in it; and an old box Applejack had spend a lot of time on to fill with toys.

Between the beds stood a table, painted white, and on top of it were pictures of their friends and family, along with a rotating lamp providing the ambiente of a train riding across the walls, with many animals hurrying alongside it. This room wasn’t the best thing, but still good.

Well, usually, as a distinct odor hit Applejack as her nose came up. It was the kind of smell that made the gag reflex do its job, but Applejack was familiar enough with it to just congratulate herself on good timing.

She closed the trap-door too, and stepped farther into the room, where she put the bags onto the left bed. It was a rather small bed where a pony with a wilder sleep pattern would probably have fallen out, but for her it worked. The sheets had belonged to her mother, they were green with oranges, grapes, apples and bananas on them.

Applejack thought they were hopeful, and lightened the mood at least a bit. The cute smiles they put on only helped, and they made Apple Bloom more comfortable. Just as the big sister needed to do, and so she turned to her sister’s bed.

This one was about the same size as hers, but railings protected the one who slept in it from falling out. The wood was painted white, unlike the brown of Applejack’s, and the bedding was done in yellow on the sides and edges, while the sheets had a green square in the middle, surrounded by a line in the same red as Apple Bloom’s mane. Everything else however was adorned by pink floral motives, the ones that made the filly feel so calm and safe.

Applejack quietly leaned against the railing, and for a moment just went over the one who slept in the bed.

Most of Apple Bloom was covered up, except for her head. The cute little thing had her eyes closed and held her favorite teddy bear close, all while suckling on her binkie. The red mane was a mess from turning around in her sleep, but Applejack was glad the filly had slept and not noticed how her sister had left.

Leaving her alone was painful enough, but if she had woken? Applejack didn’t know whether or not she would have forgiven herself for that.

But her little sister was a stubborn baby as it seemed, probably as thick-headed as their mother or grandmother; she had slept through the night. Applejack felt her fears and anxiety leaving the more she watched her little sister, the more she listened to her soft breaths and quiet suckling on her paci.

The filly seemed content in her sleep, and for a moment Applejack wondered whether she dreamt of something. Then she took another breath, and once more took notice of the smell.

Applejack couldn’t help but giggle to herself, though she stifled it quickly. Whatever her baby sister dreamed of, it was good enough to ignore any real world issues. Yes, and even though it was unnecessary Applejack moved her hoof beneath the covers. All the signs pointed towards Apple Bloom, so it was merely a courtesy to check, but as she got one feel of the diaper, she knew immediately that the filly had soiled it in her sleep. Immediately, Applejack let her hoof retreat, not wanting to invade her sister’s privacy more than necessary.

Even though, she knew how much Apple Bloom hated a dirty diaper, and waking up in one for the first since forever would probably leave her cranky for the rest of the day. Applejack went with her hoof through the filly’s mane, causing a joyful, indescribable noise to escape the filly’s mouth. I’d better change her before she wakes up, then reward her for staying dry overnight.

It was the same old blues as so many years ago, really, as they had just decided to potty train Apple Bloom. Their mother had still been there at that time, Applejack remembered, with a bright red mane and eyes as deep as the sea. Now, she wasn’t here, but Applejack would do her best nonetheless. She went over to the saddle bags, grabbing the new diapers out of the one she had worn on her left.

Apple Bloom would probably see that these ones had prints while the one she was wearing didn’t, but even if she figured that out, the point was that she would never know that she had messed in her sleep.

Applejack turned around then and slowly lifted her baby sister’s blanket up, so that she could change her.

For a moment she stopped, thinking about how long it had been since her sister had been potty trained, about how weird it seemed–but then, Apple Bloom needed her now more than ever, and as the big sister, she needed to make sure the little one felt safe during all circumstances.

Yes, even though Apple Bloom would probably find her Cutie Mark soon, even though she had learned at school and from Twilight Sparkle, and helped Applejack so much on the farm, she needed to be protected.

Dawn would come, everypony would wake up and Apple Bloom would rely on her again. She took the powder out from beneath the bed and as Apple Bloom stirred a bit in her sleep, Applejack rubbed her belly.

“Don’cha worry, you’ll be clean in no time,” she cooed, and weirdly enough, despite every part of her body hurting and maybe some wounds having started to bleed again, she didn’t feel any pain.

There was no pain at all.