My Baby Sister

Cold water ran down her legs, mixing with the blood and dyeing the river in a dirty red. Applejack moved her hoof over her tried to rub gently against the wounds, to clean them a bit. It stung, but now the pain made her feel alive.

Alive was good.

She looked at the water in hopes of finding her reflection staring back at her, but the water didn’t reflect anything. Even with the broken light of the Tear coming down on them, giving Applejack a headache, the water refused to play the part of the mirror. It wasn’t too bad, however, as she probably looked horrible.

She sat in the river, her little sister a bit away from her, dipping her head into the water and enjoying her diaperless freedom. At least Applejack hoped she found some enjoyment, considering they had to move on soon.

There was also the matter of Rainbow Dash. She’d beaten her, hurt her, so she was probably angry right now, had probably told Big Macintosh and now they were both still walking around, wondering where the sisters were gone to. He’d be worried, as always.

He’d been worried the day Apple Bloom was born and he’d been worried the day a young Applejack had moved for Canterlot. Back then, he’d always given her a smile in the end. Big Macintosh always was the more optimistic one in the family.

And Dash? She probably just wanted some cider. Not that she didn’t deserve getting punched for breaking in without a warning, but maybe, just maybe, Applejack had to admit to overreacting about the whole affair. She couldn’t have wanted to hurt Apple Bloom after all.

Right?

She took a deep breath and moved her hoof up, letting it touch against the fabric of the bandana she wore around her neck still. She lifted it up ever so slightly, to look at the colors. The cyan seemed so pale.

As Applejack blinked she saw the fire emerging from her friend’s skull flash up.

“I imagined it,” she told herself.

After all, she couldn’t be gone. None of them were. Not really, they were just somewhere else. Fluttershy was in her hut and Rarity made dresses in her boutique, while Pinkie was with her family and Twilight remained in the library, reading books like she was trying to beat a record.

The cloth was soaked with water, she’d emerged herself in the water almost immediately after they’d arrived her. Only after that had she taken care of Apple Bloom’s diaper.

“We don’t have any others,” the filly had said, her voice carrying suspicion.

“I think nobody’ll mind yer wiggling your hiney around out here,” Applejack had answered with a smile.

But Apple Bloom still eyed her, maybe because she knew that she wasn’t grown up enough to walk around without proper protection, maybe that threat from earlier still hung in her thoughts.

Applejack hoped so, because the threat was far worse than the actual punishment.

She looked over to the riverside, where the onesie lay in the dirt. The diaper itself was carelessly thrown away, but Applejack promised herself to come back for it later once the situation with Dash had been resolved.

Apple Bloom, meanwhile turned back to her, the pacifier still in her mouth.

“Where do we go next,” she probably said, but Applejack wasn’t sure. That binky really wasn’t doing her speech a favor.

That and the lack of teeth. In all honesty, Applejack felt proud of Apple Bloom already talking so much.

“What’cha mean?” she asked, enjoying the conversation for now.

“We can’t go back.”

Couldn’t they? Applejack rubbed her chin with a hoof. Avoiding Rainbow Dash didn’t really seem like a good idea, unless she’d told Granny Smith, who was one of the primary factors why the cider house’d remained untouched for so long.

Now that Applejack thought about it, both she and Apple Bloom might get into trouble for staying in there for so long. To tell the truth, they didn’t have an excuse to stay in there for so long.

Applejack wanted to look to the sky for answers, but caught herself seconds before. The woods were obscuring it for a good part but even if one focused on the ground, on a clear day like this, the lighting was just way too wrong. It came from every angle, in every color, in every brightness. There were darker patches in the woods and some where all that remained of the trees were black patches.

Looking at what lay above also was bad. Twilight had told her not too look, so she didn’t.

She couldn’t really remember why, but that didn’t matter right now. Right now, all that mattered was figuring out why they’d been in the cider house to begin with. Any sort of excuse could work.

“We can’t go back to the cider house. The door got broke. So, how ‘bout we just apologize to Dash. I’m sure it was all just one big understanding,” she finally said.

Apple Bloom stared at her, suckling her binky instead of saying anything. Applejack could easily read the disapproval from her. She shrugged.

“She’s my friend, Apple Bloom. Put some trust into her.”

For a moment, her little sister went quiet, wanted to say something. Applejack’s leg hurt, the gash from the accident still bled a little. Otherwise, she wasn’t in pain at all.

“What about Granny?”

“Well,” Applejack started, biting her lower lip.

“She’ll be furious, y’know,” Apple Bloom said with a tiny smile.

Does she think this is a game? Applejack wondered, but had to admit that she probably did. A little filly like that, still too young to see the bigger picture. She probably thought it’d be amusing to see her big sis get chewed out.

Probably as vengeance for not getting a nap. Actually, Applejack was sure that was the reason.

“Well, we’re all adults,” she defended herself feebly, her voice sounding unusually shaky.

Well, it wasn’t all that unusual. While the Apples were a friendly bunch even amongst themselves, Granny Smith was still seen as the de-facto authority on everything in the household and she knew just which buttons to push to make Applejack feel like helpless filly if she only wanted.

Right now, Apple Bloom needed her to be strong and not weak. RIght now, she couldn’t afford getting yelled at by their granny, because she needed to be a rolemodel.

Apple Bloom stood up and waddled over to her. Even without a diaper, she was unsteady on her legs. If she weren’t just a little filly, it might’ve even worried Applejack.

When she was close to her she sat down by her sister’s side and leaned against her.

“Ya promised we’d go to Twilight’s place when we got the chance,” she said, rubbing her head against Applejack’s better shoulder.

This sort-of annoyed Applejack. A part of her wanted to be mad because Apple Bloom suggested that they’d do the irresponsible thing and run, and another part of her wanted to run from her angry grandmother.

How long had it been since she’d last been truly, truly scolded by Granny Smith? It must’ve been when Apple Bloom was just a foal.

Not too long ago then, a voice inside her whispered, almost reassuringly.

As she looked down into the water she wondered why it didn’t reflect her face. What did her face look like anyhow? Was it an ugly mug? A beautiful piece of art? Were the freckles still there or had the rot eaten them? Was she old? Was she young?

On her way to the river she’d been painfully aware that Rainbow Dash’s sudden fall-scare, or however you wanted to call it, had lead to her relieving herself. Apple Bloom hadn’t noticed, luckily, but that didn’t change that it’d happened.

Weird, with everything that’d happened she couldn’t quite tell what date it was. There had been a bright sun and a blue sky when Apple Bloom was born. There’d been rain and thunder the day before she arrived back at the farm after her trip to Manehatten. Big Macintosh had once helped her clean up wet sheets before their granny could take notice, with a white moon looking down through her window.

Does it matter? she had to wonder.

It did, but everything felt so strange and distant now. Was she truly not an old mare and ages had gone past her? Wounds bleeding, muscles aching, she felt her breaths short and unsteady.

“Applejack?”

A voice called out to her, here, beneath the rotten apple trees she couldn’t take care of anymore.

For a moment she felt like breaking down again, but she stopped herself before the fall. Strength was all she needed.

“What’re ya thinkin’ ‘bout?”

Apple Bloom’s voice was tiny. Her baby sister, her little cutie-pie.

She felt her own mouth open, felt every muscle its movement utilized. Yet no noise escaped her. Apple Bloom was too young to understand, because even Applejack, the older one, couldn’t quite grasp what she thought about.

“Jus’ adult stuff,” she heard herself say, almost like admitting it.

Why had they been at the cider house, why had they stayed away from other ponies? She wanted to protect Apple Bloom, but a part of her felt like it was to protect herself. Granny would’ve been mad if she knew about all the restyling she did to that place, Big Macintosh would probably call her childish, staying there and playing House with her sister.

Childish was what it was and maybe she just wasn’t mature enough to admit that it was.

That’s why it was fine to run away too, right? Because she wasn’t mature enough to face her responsibilities?

“What sort of adult stuff?” Apple Bloom asked.

Applejack grinned, looking at the blackened trunk of a tree that had once been whole, but now its ashes lay scattered across the orchards.

“Dunno, but maybe Twilight’ll know,” she said and rose up, looking down at her sister. “How ‘bout we visit Auntie Twi?”

Apple Bloom looked her in the eyes, clearly focusing on them and ignoring the sky that rose up behind her. She gave a small fist pump and a smaller “Yeehaw,” from behind her paci.

Applejack made sure to at least grab the onesie, Apple Bloom seemed to like it, and then they turned towards Ponyville. Even without the sun, navigating came easy to Applejack, especially the acres. During the day, she was sure to spot somepony long before they would spot them and they were far enough away from the road so that she could be sure that nopony would come after them.

And if someone came, it’d be like a game of hide-and-seek.

Which would be kind of awesome, after all that time. Sure, she was still tired, hobbling on her front leg and her little sister would need some help, too, but it’d be fun.

As they walked along, ever so quietly, she noticed how Apple Bloom remained close to her side, often looking around her back. By this point she was probably getting hit with all the implications of not wearing something protective around her rear.

Yup, thought Applejack, with a certain sense of entitlement, that’s what all those protests before were for. Enjoy it while it lasts.

She didn’t say it, instead tried to smile encouragingly for her little sister, but that didn’t change anything about her demeanor.

Trees crumbled, fruits long eaten by the earth, Applejack felt the melancholy weigh down on her as they marched ever onwards. As fidgety as her sister became about her bodily situation, as much did Applejack became saddened by the state her home was in.

She’d walked on the roads on so many nights, but the darkness always obscured the true desolation the breaking of the sky had left behind. A part of her wanted to touch the trees that remained, wanted to feel if they were truly dead and gone. A part of her wanted to buck one of them, hoping a red, juicy apple would fall onto the ground.

A part of her was just thinking how mad Granny Smith would be about her skipping out on work today. This might well be first time she did that, too.

The mare, no, the filly told herself that there wasn’t that much to work on anyway. It wasn’t her responsibility, all she wanted was to be with her sister and nopony would take that from her.

She spotted the trees parting, the sky rising up and quickly focused on the ground directly before them. One only noticed how hard it was too avoid looking at the sky once it was a necessity to do so.

Apple Bloom did the same. Her sister, however, noticed how nervously she suckled on her binky.

“Are ya that worried that ya can’t stay dry much longer?”

Apple Bloom sort-of rolled her eyes. “Har har. You try wearin’ them bloody thick diapers for months and then goin’ without.”

Months? her mind asked, but her mouth said: “Language.”

Again, Apple Bloom sort of rolled her eyes and then they both halted before a fence. Not any old fence but the most important one. The one that marked the end of Sweet Apple Acres. From this point, there were no more trees, only a hillslope covered in yellowish grass that went downwards. As the ground became even again, the houses of Ponyville appeared.

And Applejack found it strange sight to behold.

“Was it always this beautiful?” she heard Apple Bloom ask, with no binky obscuring any words.

The colorful houses of Ponyville stood there in a manner that an educated eye would describe as “chaotic”. Some houses appeared like they were built into one another without the other even noticing, some roofs seemed more like candy fresh out of a wrapper. For Applejack however, every house was a Pony she’d known.

Even from here, that two-toned house of Tavi and Scratch could be seen. Bon-Bons and Lyra’s home still had that unexplained hole in its roof, while nothing but a ruin remained of the town hall or the clock tower. Some parts were gone, but the memories weren’t.

And the whole town was dyed in all the lights and all the colors. It was a feast of starlight, as if Ponyville was welcoming them back after so much time had gone by.

Only a few weeks, Applejack told herself, despite it feeling like it had been centuries since she’d been here.

“We’re home,” Apple Bloom said, small but happy.

“Yeah,” Applejack said and spotted the hospital on the edge of town. She focused on it and only it, not the sky.

There was a voice in the sky and it beckoned her to look. There was a song amidst that stars that demanded to be listened to. There was a lie whispered in her ear and she refused to listen.

“An’ I just figured out where to go first.”

“Wha-” Apple Bloom said, following her eyes. “No, we need to go to Twilights.”

“Well, Dash’s little maneuver got my leg pretty banged up,” Applejack defended herself. She didn’t have much of a feeling left in it and by now was really just dragging it along like drunk friend after a party. “And I’m not really going to Twilight without getting you some diapers.”

Apple Bloom looked at her hooves, blushing. Applejack didn’t get why, but figured it because she’d promised to get Apple Bloom along with potty training earlier. Truthfully, she probably was going to need a sheet of paper to keep track of all those promises she’d made.

“Plus,” she added, “I’d prefer to not spank ya in front of Twi. That would be a bit harsh.”

And Apple Bloom stood aghast again. “Oh come on, you can’t actually mean to do that. I,” with a twitch of the mouth she put the paci back in. “Ah’m nawt thoing t again.”

“I didn’t get a word you just said, which is really appropriate, because you don’t get a say in how you’ll be punished. Honestly, language is important. Now come along.”

With that, Applejack hobbled onwards and Apple Bloom followed suit. It was refreshing to have her baby sister not fight every step of the way, so Applejack decided to play it out like she was going to reward Apple Bloom for being on her best behaviour. The reward would be no punishment.

Applejack really had to admit that she was getting good at this baby sister thing, again. Yet she felt not that compelled to smile, because she felt her vision get blurry with every new step.

Then, shortly before they reached the end of the slope, she almost stumbled, only catching herself so very barely.

“Applejack,” her sister said.

Too loud.

They heard.

They answered.

And from the corners of the house she spotted them coming around. The first one had remnants of a once-black coat. His dark brown mane, though messy, was still intact. Yet his face was only bones with a bit of flesh drenched in puss hanging from his cheek. Fire were eyes and his innards gleamed with the bite of Tartarus.

Apple Bloom stumbled backwards, but Applejack knew she couldn't trust her eyes and blinked.

Right she was, because once she opened her eyes again, he was standing there. A gentle colt with a brown coat and wearing a shawl that was far too big for him. Before Twilight had come, Rainbow Dash had called him the biggest egghead in Ponyville. Hooves, a doctor. She’d known him before the sky crashed apart, she and Rainbow Dash once fought a great snowball battle against him, Big Macintosh, and Derpy.

Hooves wasn’t a monster, he was alive and smiling and wanted to play.

“He’s it,” she heard herself say and grabbed her sister, lifted her up on her back.

A giggle escaped her as she hobbled forward, towards the hospital. It was just like back in those days. Rainbow Dash, Big Macintosh, Hooves, they were all just playing a large game, and Applejack was sure to make it through together with her little sister. She dragged her limbs across the ground and there was no more pain for a filly like her.